Tell me something crazy
>>678350198
SOMETHING CRAZY
>>678350198
The moon is made of cheese. What cheese you may ask? gods dick cheese
>>678350198
YOU WONT GET YOUR CHINESE MEDICINE RAGNAR
>>678350198
BPA positioning is responsible for all the faggots that think they're actually women.
ITT: Shitlord Stories; or, Close Encounters of the Tumblr Kind
Here's mine:
>be me
>high school fag: senior edition (& Knuckles)
>due to personal shit, got transferred from high achieving high school to an "alternative" school elsewhere in the district
>read: last stop before prison
>alt read: whites are the minority
>this place's two main selling points are their "state of the art" daycare and their "independent study" program
>apparently I am considered autistic ebough for independent study
>best academic thing that ever happened to me
>literally all I do is come in once a week to my "teacher's" classroom and hand in whatever the essay of the week was
>teacher's standards are rock bottom low due to prolonged exposure to sand people
>Figured out pretty quick I can hand in what I think is absolute crap to my standards and she fucking loves it
>flawless A's
>eventually 4.0 gpa
>in two months I am valefuckingdictorian
>top kek
>fast foward four months
>at this point I don't even open the books, essays are 5+ pgs of sparknotes and bullshit
>I am turning in my 'work' one week and there is a handful of other kids in the room, like always
>notice one kid sitting by himself in a more secluded corner of the room, kinda doodling in his journal or some shit
>looks lonely
>iknowthatfeelbro.jpg
>feel bad for the guy and decide to strike up a conversation
>walk over and realize he is wearing cat ears and a fox tail
>oh fuck it's a furfag abort abort
>too late, furfag noticed he has a visitor
>"hey dude! You're anon, right?"
>yeah...
>"cool! I bet you never even knew I existed!"
>haha...uh...
>"you have dogs, right?"
>...yeah?
>"you'll find this interesting, then! A Labrador's fully erect penis is as large as a human male's."
>he smiles like as if he just commented on how blue the sky was or something
>what the fuck
>why the fuck
>how the fuck
>so many questions
cont.
>I look around to see if anyone else heard this shit
>no one cares, business as usual
>isthisnormalforthiskidor.jpg
>this is the first interaction I have ever had with the guy
>and he is talking about doggy dicks
>goddamn furfags
what the fuck
>month goes by before i talk to any other students
>learned my fucking lesson
>but apparently I didn't learn it well enough
>because the next time i open my mouth I have the pleasure of pissing off a male lesbian
>this was a biological male who dresses like a typical guy and all that shit
>but decided he was a special snowflake and decided he was now a she
>uses female restrooms and demands female pronouns
>but has no plans to ever transition, uses male pronouns on all documents, and for all intents and purposes, looks like a dude
>a retarded dude but a dude nonetheless
>oh yeah and it's a lesbian too because it got carried away with the labelmaker
>i was stupid enough to call it a he
>half male half lesbian full retard lost its shit and started ranting about gender and society and some shit
>lol k whatevar
>my indifference enrages it with some sort of autistic fury, and with this pure tard anger it is compelled to punch the wall
>wasthatnecessary.jpg
>breaks hand and both it and wall suspended under zero tolerance
>classroom is drafty for a few days as we are missing both a wall and a major source of hot air
oh yeah and this is the best one
>counselor pulls me aside one day
>"anon, you're almost done with your classes and you've been doing good, so I want to offer you the chance to enroll as a dual student at (community college) for extra credits."
>okie dokie counselorino
>tell friend who goes to said college
>"lol anon I have to take an acting class for some reason, you could take that one too"
>alright i will
>never had any experience with acting before
>but how hard could it be?
>answer: not very
>like a thespian fag I actually like it
>first time all school year I've given a shit
>start looking for opportunites to practice outside of class
>fellow classmate tells me about a drag show she is organizing with her club and how they are looking for performers
>"anon you should totally be a drag king!! You'll look soooo handsome!!"
>uh...ok?
>I'll try anything once
>it will be the death of me
>between then and the 'performer' meeting said classmate shows her true colors
>called other classmate out for being a 'cis male'
>talked at length about 'cultural appropriation'
>showed everyone her collection of 'healing herbs'
>is actually a tumblrina
>great
>by this point she had been assigned my scene partner so no escaping her autism
>fucking great
>talks incessantly about the fagformer meeting
>I don't want to deal with the drama fallout that would happen if I don't show up
>I still need to work with this retard for half a semester
>so I waste an evening and go to the meeting
>shaved heads and land whales galore
>apparently she had roped three other normie classmates into going as well
>the four of us awkwardly look at each other while the fatties scream about supernatural and shit
>I especially am out of place with decent hair, 125 lbs and normal people clothes
>stick out like a sore thumb
>tumblrinas notice an intruder in their ranks
>some dissent and confusion
>Draw a famous movie scene as shit as possible and Anons try to guess what it is
>>678349840
Ah yes, the famous one-blue-cactus-in-the-desert-at-night scene from One Blue Cactus in the Desert at Night
>>678349840
Independence day
>>678349840
Independence day?
my attempt
non-porn webm thread
Why do you mock on them?
Autistic children are probably much more smart than you and me
They think in a way you can't, faggot, they are one step ahead in evolution terms
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lr4_dOorquQ
>>678349745
It doesn't matter how smart you are since this world is owned by psychopaths and social butterflies.
Can't be that smart if they can't even communicate on a basic level.
>>678349745
We are all autists here OP, that's why we are here to begin with
One step ahead but they wouldn't be able to live on their own...
MOOOSECA E TRIKKE TRAKKE TRIKKE TRAKKE
Per la moooseeeca
Would you date an autistic girl?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zgvwqvamdts
Maybe, but I don't think you are a girl.
I hope she dates me. she told me if I pay her she'll be my gf. Seems worth it to have a qt autistic gf.
>>678349508
yeah if she's hot and gives head
>>678349508
Right, because blacks are rubbing themselves with fried chicken and jews aren't taking baths in money. Everybody's got their shit and good for them, too.
What's is the best weed seed I start planting with and why? Im totaly New for this
>>678348518
A solid indica, because they're fast growers and they make you feel slower.
dumbass, use clones
>>678349240
What r those
>>678349240
Fuck this guy ^
question anons. my gf and i haven't fucked in about 3 weeks. last night she asked if we can have a mmf threesome.
pro: we have sex
con: i don't know how comfortable i'll feel
any other anons have experience with this?
Lol get cucked faggot
She has cheated you and feels bad, so she wants to do it because she thinks it won't be a "cheating" anymore. Sorry bud.
>>678349927
thanks for the constructive feedback
>>678349808
just do it
it's fun!
I'm horny. This is my ass. Let me see the cock you'd fuck it with.
>>678349020
bro what the fuck wrong with your toe its the same size as your dick
>>678349379
It's called perspective bro
>>678349020
bump
>>678349020
what's it called when a dude sticks his dick and balls behind his thighs like that?
Step1: Ask a 33 year old kissless virgin anything.
Step2: Feel better about your own pathetic life.
Do the feelings of emptiness ever truly subside?
Will you post a pic of yourself?
>>678349338
What don't you get OP? Pussy is easy.
>>678349482
Alcohol fills the hole pretty well. I am at my 5th beer atm.
Atheists claim to support science, yet they are unable to provide evidence that God doesn't exist.
Any religion has failed to prove God Exist...
>>678350409
Checkmate
this is not the bait you are looking for
Bad logic. Just because I can't prove there isn't a planet of green strawberries 10023 light years away doesn't mean that there isn't.
I had sex with my 8 year old sister when I was 10,does this count as rape??
Idk anon sry
>>678348069
Rape, pedo and incest all at once by the age of ten.
You were born for the chans, captain.
Does she care?
You were both underage so it wasn't pedophilia at least. Did she try to stop you?
/deutsch/FUCKEN 2.0
...
Erster für Vita
Deutschland
t. König des Fadens
>>678350104
mach es für deutschland.
s/fur friday!
the ride never ends!
New Hunger Games Thread
Doing 24 tributes
Claire! is forbidden
>>678350975
Bacontits
Inara
Tay
Charles
It fucking stinks
nigga clean dat shit
you know what else stinks? your mumma
Trips and I'll make it a 'Hitler' 'tache.
>>678350314
And then suck a bunch of Jew cock.
>>678350314
Won't your boyfriend get mad?
sure
>>678350314
I can smell your cock breath from here.
New thread Boxxy/Catie
Forever Queen
>>678350264
Best thought that will ever be thought.
Also the blueballs if there's teasing. Oh jesus fuck the blueballs.
>>678350335
My cousin met her at a party in Burbank last year. They ended up fucking. He said it was totally sub-par. She got shit all over his dick, and violently queefed at the end.
https://encyclopediadramatica.se/Boxxy
Where's that faggot that thinks he knows the rules?
Feel like a worthless trash /b/ need some depressing music to relate to. Also feel thread.
>>678347930
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-o9gf_soFBM&nohtml5=False
>>678347930
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1IdTgDlSVHY&nohtml5=False
>>678347930
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lP077RitNAc
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WpmYwDhxZoU&ebc=ANyPxKp63H9K5EQIrxXySd06IuFxFQ-SXqz2mTKt24CbjivKbWIB3IfmTCm18wEkNaUAeoo0SHOBOuLmzfy2kuk7T8w_PjVnqQ&nohtml5=False
