girls you've fucked
>>768683364
None, I fuck women.
>>768683463
thats pretty gay bro
>>768683364
traps are no girls
ITT we all act like proper gentlemen until somebody gets trips.
Jolly good
Jolly good!
>>768689977
Your double trips impress me greatly good sir.
Hello fellow gentleman, lovely weather isn't it? Perfect weather for trips...
>3:00am
>watching some based icarly like I usually do
>also playing minecraft xbox edition
>get distracted from building my poo poo pee pee themed city in creative mode by miranda cosgroves qtness
>pull out my weenie and start masturbating
>imagine what she looked like as a toddler while im doing this
>its too much for me
>realize before I finish that mommy said she is tired of cleaning up my semen from the carpet
>quickly grab one of my shit jugs and cum directly into it
>dont miss a drop
>mommy comes in at 3:01 like she usually does to clean up my mess
>"mommy look!" i exclaim while i lift the shit jug high
>she looks confused, but then notices what ive done
>"o-okay a-anon. thats a g-good boy." she says
>"what do I get mommy?" I ask while steping towards her
>"a-a good boy point a-anon" she says as she slowly starts to shake
>I run directly into her knocking her over to get through the door
>dont have time to put my weenie back into my undies
>arrive at the fridge panting because it is like a whole 30 feet away
>mom comes up limping with a tears on her cheeks
>she reaches to the top shelf of the fridge because Im only 5'2 and cant reach
>she gives me my tendies with mayonnaise just the way I like them
I stoped cumming in my shit jugs after that though. it was too much work lifting them up
Who is this thread for? People that read your retarded ass story and go “ok”? Get the fuck out of here you stupid ass faggot
>enjoying some pizza rolls while masturbating to iCarly
>bitch mom knocks and tells me to clean my room and get rid of my shit jug and start looking for a job
>start faking pain "Oww! I gots me a booboo!" While sneaking up behind the door
> when she comes in I knock her purse out of her hands and take a big fat shit in it
>"Now take me to Wendy's to get some tendies or I'll fucking kill myself."
> she complies, weeping
> we get there and they have Frozen toys
> I specifically ask for an Elsa toy so I can spunk on it and let it get crusty
> normie BITCH gave me a FUCKING OLAF fucking NORMALFAG I can't believe what my eyes are SEEING right now GODDAMMIT
>see little girl who has the Elsa
>"Trade?"
>she seems scared
> whatever I need it more than her so I rip it out of her hands
> she starts crying and her Chad looking father comes running after me
>"Mom, can you fucking hurry? I'm going to miss Yo Gabba Gabba you slut."
> we get in the car, mom seems on the verge of tears
>"You must realize this was your fault for having me. I don't owe you shit. Your sick pleasure fucking Chad' s dick to have me should be enough reward."
Normies just don't get it
>>768676146
It's for the triggered
>Wake up early its 4pm
>Dont smell tendies in the air.
>I waddle to my door around the piss bottles.
>Start slamming my head into the wall and screaming TENDIES TENDIES I WANT TENDIES
>Slut bitch Mommy slowly opens the door to my lair
>With tears in her eyes she slides in my tendies and juice-box.
>I tell her iCarly is on later so she better prepare the highest luxary goodboypoints can buy
>I make my way back to my bed exhausted from my journey across the room and back i rest
>my diaper seems almost full ill need a change before the big event later
>pondering what is going to happen in tonights episode i drift into slumber my little pony playing in the background
>I am awoken to mommy cleaning my piss jars up i tell her i need a diaper change aswell she nods with a look of disgust on her face
>Soon iCarly will be on the grand event
>The theme songs starts playing i scream at mommy to hurry or ill murder her and feed her to our dog buttersnout
>Mommy enters my room she is dressed in appropriate apperal plaid shorts converss sneekers and a hoodie her hair dyed the perfect shade of blonde.
>Now my Good boy favorite boy reward rivaled only by tendies and juice boxes begins
>I wait for a scene with sam in it my favorite iCarly character she is the best i then have mommy do her special service to me and pretend its sam
>i came five times tonight it was the best i finish by blowing on sams i mean mommy butt and tell that dirty slut to go make me SOME FUCKING TENDIES
>she starts walking away when a sight i never witnessed before appears before my eyes SAM IN A BIKINI JUST SHOWED ON AIR OMG
>With a speed of achilles i move like a lion and grab mommy before she makes it out of my lair
>I throw her on my computer desk and did adult things too her more then i ever thought i could
>when im finally finished mommy isnt moving
>iCarly is over i lay down and start watching adventure time
>covered in my special sauce mommy starts crying
>i tell her GO GET ME FUCKING TENDIES
Is there any love here for chubby/fat crossdressers/traps/sissies? I can't get enough of them.
>>768685915
i hate them
worst kinda shit. lose weight or fuck off
>>768686211
I think theyre cute.
More to hold onto while fucking.
>>768685915
As long as they're not too fat I don't mind a little jiggle, especially if that rump is plump.
does any one have name of this one?
Drumpf hate thread
You just hate Trump because your parents do. Move out of their basement and have an original thought
Fuck Trump he is just a Cheeto he will make USA bankrupt and he will be impeached and uh...... RUSSIA BOUGHT ADS ON FB YOU GUYS!!!
>>768683165
faggot
>>768682231
Dude, why did you put a hat on a potato?
> be 17
> snort Meth
> 1.5 grams because why not
> have a party in my place everything is good
> go out for a smoke
> panic.webm
> pace to a nearby woods
> hide
> fear that someone is trying to kill me
> shit myself
> piss myself
> black out
> 10+ missed calls from party guests
> fear that they gonna give me in to the killer
> keep hiding> getting dark
> psychosis settles down a little bit
> decide to go back home
> someone called my parents in
> pants full of shit and piss
> foam on my lips
> white tongue
> pupils like quarters
> they ask what the fuck happened
> Said i drank coffee, redbull and smoked cigarettes
> no one seemed to believe
> MFW
> dont sleep for 3 days afterwards
> get taken to hospital
> no drug tests
> sent to loony ward
> get prescribed with Cypralex
> Take 3 tabs
> sleep for 18 hours straight
> everything ended well
> News spread fast, everyone were giving me the looks
> FF 8 years. Still have anxiety whenever I think of that night.
Share your story fags
>>768683757
>1.5 grams
i am amazed you still live bud
>16 yo
>just moved schools
>this new one is ultra strict boarding school
>i dont get along with anyone
>decide to buy some mdma
>10 pills
>sunday, take one
>ascend to godhood
>strut around school, meet everyone
>love everyone
>everyone loves me
>stay up until 3am talking to a girl on the phone
>wake up at 6 for school
>feel horrendous
>take another pill
>best day of my life, me and this girl kiss in the bathroom after school
>first gf
>wake up feeling shit, take another pill
>i do this everyday of the week
>i take 2 on the last three days
>run out
>get depressed, no serotonin, cant sleep or concentrate
>get a liver infection
>feel literally dead
>gf breaks up with me
>takes 2 months to feel fine again
>such a good week i had tho
nice
>never used anything but weed
>life has always been good to me
>the end
>>768684829
Just buy a shit ton and never stop taking them
>>768685167
ha i would but sadly would quite literally die
Lizzy thread. Looking for op. There’s more of this girl, and I want to see more of her. She was posted in an on off recently. The red head’s name is Audrey.
Can we get this thread bumping
It would be a shame to let her content die...
Oh well I guess this thread is going to die
why are trump supporters so retarded?
She lost, get over it
rural and suburban retards should dump the electoral process so the big cities can in their greater and more liberal wisdom fix every government problem with more government.
>>768686926
Because they are cis white male
>>768686926
I didn't want either to win but that's politics. I'm an anarchist libertarian or something. I really don't care as long as nobody fucks with me.
The NRA is (Not) a terrorist organization.
No shit, they're just lobbyists for gun manufacturers, and they've convinced half-retarded rednecks with a 7th grade education that they somehow support hunters.
>>768683014
Lobbying is bad because?
>>768682921
good for you that you slightly changed the copypasta
>>768683014
The NRA is a 501c. Of the $250mil they get annually, only about $5mil is from gun manufacturers. They spend about $20mil on political activity (which includes lobbying). Do you know how much Michael Bloomberg spends on his anti-gun lobbying? About $50mil per year. Only about $7mil of that comes from his gun control group ("Mayors Against Illegal Guns", "Brady Campaign", etc). Seems to me that it's not money that is getting the politicians to listen to them. If it's money, why are they listening to $20mil/year rather than $50mil/year?
FB/IG fap thread
Big fat white ass thread
BOOM
Hold up Anon, I have reason to suspect you are in possession of illegal dubs. Show me your singles and you are free to go.
>>768688782
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EjekealIyEA
can't catch me popo!
UHHH
>>768688782
Here you go, officer.
prepare to cum edition
Wub wub wub
>Walk into your bedroom
>You find Maisie Williams standing there
What do you do /b/?
turn 360 degrees and walk right out
>>768687087
Get out my troll killing firearm and blow her ugly fucking head off.
>>768687149
So you'd still walk into her again? Go back to math class dumb kid.
Celeb Thread
I Want To ____ That Bunny Edition
>>768686587
cuddle
BREED
Luna b
brown girl thread, not all pajeets are nasty
>>768680688
more of this girl, please.
>>768681611
That I have seen too... more?
Michigan nudes
Bump lefty
>>768684015
more big tits plz
Cheating/ Cuck thread- share your pics and stories of girls that have chucked or cheated on you.
Worst meme ever
Bump
Love talking about/showing my wife. Soulrebel425 on kik.
What would /b/ do to this assholes?
Internet being burned alive is the most painful. Is it right tho?
>>768686694
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EjekealIyEA
CIA NIGGER!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Should have dismembered her as he was raping her.
Sounds hot
bet that shit was all wallered out by the time they got ready to chop her up
Hey b/, just got my first automatic watch today
Did I do well?
>watch thread
phone fags are welcome to bump the thread
ok
>>768684294
Nice !
>>768684294
Looks nice. I'm a fan of sleek, non bulky leather watches so I like yours OP.
pic related is mine but with a brown leather band. Looking at getting a Sternglass next
>>768684294
>Orient
You did good fam
![hemingway-black-black[1].jpg](https://cdn.randomarchive.com/b/image/1526/410/1526410821131.jpg "hemingway-black-black[1]")