What is the worst thing you've done, /b/?
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
What is the worst thing you've done, /b/?
Me and a buddy did Nazi role-play at a playground at one point, there were kids around
One time i saw a little kitten in the middle of a road when i was going to school. I think he was crippled and couldn't walk, so he was just laying there, in the middle of the street.
I approached to check if he was fine, and then a big ass owl appeared from nowhere and started attacking me. I backed up, then the owl started attacking the kitten. I turned back and continued my way to school with the guilt of leaving the kitten to die to that owl.
>>768441528
Haha, it was like a concentration camp?
I raped a chicken 2 days ago.
I made a fem to male tranny go back to being male and then almost succeed in an hero-ing
At the end of a year in high school, I broke into a locker of some fag who harassed me that year. I took all of his textbooks so that he had to pay the school a few hundred dollars. Also, I smashed his glasses that he left in there.
>>768441313
>be me, 14 and horny
>befriend blind girl at school - we will call her susie
>Noone really wants to be friend with blind girl
>Susie had 10/10 tits, and cute face
>Her parents loved me for bfriending her
>Invite her over when parents are gone for night
>Parents trust me
>Sit on couch talking
>Ask her if she wants to whatch tv as a joke
>Put her hand on rock hard cock
>Susie blushes
>Take it out without saying anything and semi force head down
>cum a thousand suns into mouth and face onnly after 5 minutes
>When tries to find her way to bathroom - had already set up little bros toys on ground
>Land mind army men and lego everywhere
>Had her shoes off - house rules
>When asking for help - hide in house and push her from different angles
>End up pushing her in shower and letting water wash her- with her clothes on
>Tell her it was my friend dustin pranking
>Tell her i need to go to sleep even though it was like 7pm
>Push her outside - she calls parents
>She literally never sees me again
I once ate an authentic Cincinnati Reds coney dog and asked the vendor to leave the cheese off.
>>768441313
i have killed ten thousand people
>>768441313
Stole a loaf of bread from a 7-11 delivery truck nearly a decade ago with a mate - public nuissance charge
>>768442576
Sick fuck
>>768441313
Nice try FBI
>>768442079
idk if i believe that story
>>768441884
go on
>>768441313
Forced my retarded friend join the army told everyone my cousin was gay when I caught him fapping to gay porn
>>768442628
Id had about 30 standards to drink and legally believed that I was a lamp post by about that stage.
>be me
>be on shitty meds that i have to take or else I'll probably try to kill a hallucination
>basically a fucking zombie
>do what i want without even thinking about it
>think its a good idea to piss inside my neighbors air conditioner
>jump his fence and piss in it
>i pissed alot
>like literally i pissed an entire river
>start masturbating for some reason
>zip up my pants and go home
>a month later i see my neighbor changing his air conditioner
>he said that it smelled horrible and couldnt find the cause so he changed it
>be me, 14
>kill Bill comes out
>obsessed with blondes, yakuza, blades, but not weeb
>will forge my own
>two years in the garage setup with my dad paid off, he makes shine, I make weapons
>my own handmade blade was the prettiest I'd ever seen, despite being basic American trash
Skip to being 19
>both movies rocked my world, blondes are my kink now
>neighbour has autistic Asian child, adopted
>he's crazy 88 for sure, can't trick me
>one day he's in their back yard, toward the forest
>looking at the butterflies and shit
>I Naruto over to him
>no sense of morality, have slain 2 homeless and a few large animals
>line up, tense af, every second is so slow, perfect stance
>he looking deadeyed into my soul
>I fucking swing in a horizontal and cut deep into his arm, slashed his chest
>without hesitation he bolts through the trees making no noise
>I dropped to dart for him but left my blade, it was trash anyway
I'll save you the suspension
>within 5 minutes run him down, no Chase scene
>no tension, no buildup, no real drama to it
>sprinting, i grab his little crop of hair and slam his face straight into a tree
>knocked cold, I break his neck and bury him within the hour
>adopters thought he was napped by a phile
I forgot for a few years before I forced myself to revisit repressed memories from my fucked life during a super trip, I've got more fu ked shit unrelated to this if u want
>>768443916
im interested in hearing more anon
>>768443405
This made me kek pretty hard
>>768443916
Go on
I was walking by a jewelry store one day at a mall and noticed they happened to be a rolex dealer, so i walk through and see a nice blue/red GMT master in the display case. I leave and call a fried of mine who can get me a pretty convincing fake GMT master just like that one. Go back to the store with a long sleeve sweater on wearing the fake rolex ask to see the real deal, i slip it on my wrist over the fake, make idle banter with the sales clerk while pretending to move my arm about, casually ask how much does this nice watch go for, clerk tells me the price, still making idle chat i take off the fake and hand it back to her, and say thats way too expensive for me and leave with the real rolex still on my wrist. This was back in 03 i kept the watch until it got stolen when my apartment was broken into last year. :(
Ukraine. Shot a gp35 into an open window.
Found the lower half of a russ kid who was a spotter.. he must have been 18/19.
Hit him right in the chest.. wish I could get that out of my head
Ate my neighbor
Ate out my neighbor
>>768442079
>>Susie had 10/10 tits, and cute face
>>Noone really wants to be friend with her
sounds like total bullshit
>>768441313
I took the gold from Emhyr, didn't have a snowball fight and didn't let her trash the room...
Feels bad ending man.
>>768443916
Complete unrelated story but this involves the blade
>be 20
>think my sword is the shit
>see dad waving fucki mg 7 foot claymore with the word "McLeod" on it
>fucking highlander
>hand my blade down as a keepsake to retarded cousin, is good hiding place for murder weapon
>I'll get a new one
>call friend, M
>M and I go dig under a she'd on his grandparents property
>2 hours later we're beside a McDonald's
>I order 80 nuggets
Waited about an hour when I worked there and whipped up each 24 bag perfectly, wouldve taken 30 mins
>they forgot my milkshake
>park car 200 yd away, near post office
>get high, munch nuggets
>put on worn balaclava, nugget in mouth
>attach surpressor to stockless m4 carbine, M carrying a suppressed mp7 with fucking so many magazines
>ya don't need that many rounds, bud
>we step out of small car fully armed, nuggets and ammo in out pockets
>walk into post office
>munch nugs while I delete surveillance footage
>friend executes the single, underpaid, unmissed postman
>unlock many safeboxes
>split 34 stacks
>leave safely
I got a ticket to okinawa, ended up looking for a new blade, realized the nukes ruined Japanese culture, then fell in love with Japanese culture, and anime tiddies
Never got the blade, but now I teach numbers to slant eyed gangly alien nerds
>>768441662
green text details plz
>In it's egghole? It's butt? Beakjob?
>What kind if noises does it make?
>Is it like half balloon half fleshlight?
>How does your dick fit in a chicken?
>How you get that lined up and ready to go?
>Just ram it in it like you fingerbang that cockwhore first?
>Do rubber chicken noises give you awkward boners?
>Do you think it's ironic that you put your cock in a cock?
>Who's chicken was it?
>Ever been kicked out of a farm?
>Did you face the chicken away and close your eyes or forward and stare into it's soul as you made love to it?
>Did you cum at the same time?
>Did it cook you eggs after?
>>768446311
If you're american please tell me how to sign up, either side, idk Ukraine or russians
>>768441313
punched a grade 3 girl in the face when I was in grade 7. This was on the schoolbus
I don't remember why. I think she said something bad about bionicle
>>768443916
>>no sense of morality, have slain 2 homeless and a few large animals
jesus fuck
>>768447119
what are you even trying to say?
>>768443916
>>768447119
remember that time some dude leaked a bunch of classified shit here and we all called him a fake and a faggot
>.>
>>768447234
Learn russian. Ukrainian is different but kinda harder. Most groups literally has a phone number you can call. Study the culture. the attitude of don't care what side will get you flagged/fraged. Remember it's all nationalism. Also save money flight cost money and travel and bribes not to mention getting robbed then if you do make it and get training you get shitty gear if you don't buy ur own. Also helps if you have family/online friends who are local.
>>768447890
>>768448062
Anything posted here is a work of fiction, you shouldn't believe anything I type
This is why I am no worry about posting any illegals I have done
>>768446875
's dog.*
>>768447460
>bionicle
Underage ban much
>>768448312
LOL
Fucked my GF's friend when my gf was preggo
>>768448312
I care for the sake of gear, and comradery, and side more with Ukrainians but I would like to know what options I have for both. Besides having studied the warring territory and reasons for war I know only that I want the most action with the chance of killing and dying being very high, and if I do good I'll buy cool shit and rape corpses and blow child villages to empty lots
>>768448358
its not that i care if its true or not, I'm simply trying to understand what it is you are saying.
your dad had a sword and you wanted a sword and then you robbed a post office and murdered someone and this somehow let you get to japan without being caught? for a sword?
>>768448667
:0000
>>768448358
i am also no worry cos´worry is worry and better no worry if illegals or worry
>>768443405
Lmfao
>>768448667
was she hot
Took my wife's sisters virginity when she was living with us while she was a freshman in high school. She was living with us because she was a lying cunt and her mom kicked her out. Figured even if she did tell, my wife wouldn't believe her. She never told anyone, still see her at every holiday.
accidentally stole bubble gum from Haitian children after the bad earthquake in like 08 or 09
>>768446986
You wouldn’t make a great dad anon
>>768448956
Doesn't count if you didn't creampie it
>>768449136
Fuck that. That's how you get caught. I pulled out and came on the ground next to her.
>>768448951
gf or thot?
>>768448713
Was jealous of superior blade, cannot commit seppuku on not so sacred ground
I needed lots of money fast to leave the country fast and I wanted a real Japanese blade that costs money so I hit like the easiest target and booked it but because drugs are more illegal (for whites) in Japan I got sober and didn't find a blade and instead found
A career
An escape
A lifestyle
>>768449320
oh
whew that is quite autistic
but that also sounds much more fun than my life
>>768448956
did she want it? how many times did you fuck her?
>>768449562
She was drunk af and pretty wet. Wasn't upset about it afterwards. Only once though. A few weeks later she fucked some jiggalo white trash so I lost interest. Still super friendly and touchy around me, 4 years later.
>>768448737
God that looks so much like Bobby Joe Long it's terrifying.
>>768442079
calling bullshit on this story
