*blocks your path*
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
*blocks your path*
e-excuse me *walks around you*
>>768314249
"Excuse me, sir."
>>768314274
*grabs you by the shoulder and casually carries you back to the start*
>>768314249
*teleports behind you*
Get the fuck out of my way, man-bitch.
*grabs nose ring*
"hey, look over there, its the patriarchy making rape jokes"
>>768314459
*easily knocks you out from behind & drags you back*
i would start humping
>>768314249
"hehe hey what's up :)"
>>768314249
*sniffs your armpits and cums*
>>768314677
"Okay listen I know what you're thinking, and what I'm about to say may sound funny to you"
''Excuse me, could you please move? I have an urgent meeting with my boss''
>>768314647
*uh-oh*
>>768314726
*kicks you in the balls*
>>768314802
*blushes*
>>768314823
okay
>>768314859
okay, sure
>>768314249
Jizz Attack!
>>768314249
"AY YO, U WANT SUM FUK?!"
>>768314973
*wipes jizz from face/muscles*
>>768314993
*kicks you in the mast*
>>768314249
kick them in the balls
>>768314249
>>768314677
>>768315119
>*kicks you in the mast*
Shiver me timbers!
For real tho, who is this goddess?
*grab her by the pussy*
>>768315316
Donald Trump detected
>>768314249
TITTY TWISTER
>>768315316
*grabs you by the balls & crushes them*
>>768315404
*melts*
>>768314963
"okay so you should just put me down and... LOOK A HIGH PROTEIN DRINK"
>>768315623
*does not put you down*
May I proposition you for some sexual activity M'lady?
>>768315495
Lol plz. Im a massive dude, Im 50 pounds over weight, but at 6'4 280 this little lady couldn't handle me.
>>768315768
*kicks you in the neckbeard*
>>768315792
Id love to fuck a strong woman like that, if shes a dyke however, she disgusts me.
If I was into fucking guys, that would be one tight fuck.
>>768315668
"aaaandd... okay so do you like work out often? because you really have some nice muscles"
>>768315814
:'(
>>768314249
Rawr x3 nuzzles how are you pounces on you you're so warm o3o notices you have a bulge o: someone's happy ;) nuzzles your necky wecky~ murr~ hehehe rubbies your bulgy wolgy you're so big :oooo rubbies more on your bulgy wolgy it doesn't stop growing ·///· kisses you and lickies your necky daddy likies (; nuzzles wuzzles I hope daddy really likes $: wiggles butt and squirms I want to see your big daddy meat~ wiggles butt I have a little itch o3o wags tail can you please get my itch~ puts paws on your chest nyea~ its a seven inch itch rubs your chest can you help me pwease squirms pwetty pwease sad face I need to be punished runs paws down your chest and bites lip like I need to be punished really good~ paws on your bulge as I lick my lips I'm getting thirsty. I can go for some milk unbuttons your pants as my eyes glow you smell so musky :v licks shaft mmmm~ so musky drools all over your cock your daddy meat I like fondles Mr. Fuzzy Balls hehe puts snout on balls and inhales deeply oh god im so hard~ licks balls punish me daddy~ nyea~ squirms more and wiggles butt I love your musky goodness bites lip please punish me licks lips nyea~ suckles on your tip so good licks pre of your cock salty goodness~ eyes role back and goes balls deep mmmm~ moans and suckles
>>768314249
Hello, bye * turns around and finds a different pathing *
>>768315907
sure, would you like to see them up close? *puts you in a headlock*
>>768315961
:)
>>768316018
*watches you disappear*
>>768316071
Hey girl what are you up to tonight?
>>768314249
Effortlessly slaps her aside and moves on my way. Even though I'm not ripped, I have found that I still can lift more than 99% of the most roided out females.
>>768315985
dude you just made me lose like 3 chromosomes
>>768316071
"em, yeah they are just as hard as I thought, sooooo... could you please put me down now?"
>>768316201
Of course you can. You are a man. lol
>>768316191
lifting & kicking butts
>>768316201
*counts stars*
>>768316216
*lets you pass in awe because you actually managed to read that*
>>768316259
no :)
>>768314249
Yo baby you ever had your asshole licked by a fat man in overcoat?
>>768314249
*pulls penis out*
"eek a penis!"
>>768316437
yes
*kicks you in the overcoat*
>>768316216
I bet your pants got tight, though. Lover. :3
>>768316145
*zelda victory music plays in the background*
>>768316512
*rips penis out with bare hands*
"eek!"
>>768316409
"um, what now then"
*twists her dirty pillows*
>>768314444
Alpha quads.
>>768316537
>implying I wear pants
>>768316636
*puts you dont and sits on you until the next guy comes along*
>>768316910
>tfw still alive
"heh, niiice"
>>768316736
*victory pose*
>>768314249
I would ask for consensual sex in a very polite manner
Strike up conversation and compare workout routines.
>>768317784
*politely considers it & proceeds to kick you in the balls in the politest way imaginable*
>>768317889
*reminds you not to skip leg day*
> Baby, I been havin a tough night so treat me nice aight?
> Aight.
> Slip out of those pants baby, yeah.
> I slip out of my pants, just for you, bloodninja.
> Oh yeah, aight. Aight, I put on my robe and wizard hat.
> Oh, I like to play dress up.
> Me too baby.
> I kiss you softly on your chest.
> I cast Lvl. 3 Eroticism. You turn into a real beautiful woman.
> Hey…
> I meditate to regain my mana, before casting Lvl. 8 Cock of the Infinite.
> Funny I still don't see it.
> I spend my mana reserves to cast Mighty F*ck of the Beyondness.
> You are the worst cyber partner ever. This is ridiculous.
> Don't f*ck with me bitch, I'm the mightiest sorcerer of the lands.
> I steal yo soul and cast Lightning Lvl. 1,000,000 Your body explodes into a fine bloody mist, because you are only a Lvl. 2 Druid.
> Don't ever message me again you piece of ****.
> Robots are trying to drill my brain but my lightning shield inflicts DOA attack, leaving the robots as flaming piles of metal.
> King Arthur congratulates me for destroying Dr. Robotnik's evil army of Robot Socialist Republics. The cold war ends. Reagan steals my accomplishments and makes like it was cause of him.
> You still there baby? I think it's getting hard now.
> Baby?
>>768317991
>>768318108
*kicks you in the Green Hill Zone*
>>768314677
Would start fucking the living shit out of that fine cutie.
Banged already a more musuclar one. Shit was cash.
>>768318270
There you go...
>>768314249
Turn on the huge junkyard electro magnet over her head and watch all those piercings rip out.
>>768318263
> I roll a 4d8 and success!
> I pull myself out of the Green Hill Zone
> I readjust my robe and wizard hat
> rolling a 2d20, I cast giganigger 3000.
> SUCCESS!
>>768318270
*knocks you out with a single blow & procees to fuck the living shit out of you with a strap-on*
>>768318479
*final fantasy victory music playing*
>>768314249
I've always wanted to fight with a woman like this. Women, hell most men, aren't ready for what getting punched actually feels like. The first square shot to the jaw lays her face down, ass up 10:1
*counts the balls crushed tonight*
>>768314249
>>What would I do
You know the rules.
Tits or GTFO
>>768318942
*takes the shot head on & does a little "dance" trying to stay on the feet before falling down fae first ass up, counting stars & eyes rolling"
>>768314726
It would be called "dry-humping" in this case.
>>768319067
okay that's just not right
>>768314249
Have you heard about the mating press
>>768314249
excuse me
