How soon is “too soon” with getting engaged?
bumped
When you have doubts.
Too soon is anything less than 2 years of being together and 1 year of living together. You need to know each other long enough and know you can live together at least. Good luck on your future.
>>768025015
Got married recently after 2 years with her. Whenever it feels natural, I guess - going from bf/gf to engaged then married was a smooth transition that felt right, so I guess that's what you should look out for.
>>768025522
We’ve been together for a year and one month and have been living together for 11 months
>>768025522
Nice double dubs, but you're forgetting that arranged marriages have historically lasted longer than marriage by choice.
>it's not about what feels right, it's about doing what is right
My fiancee cheated on me and dumped me and got engaged to the person he cheated on me with only after knowing them a month
>>768025015
If you want the best advice, I'd say never get engaged to begin with and you'll never feel like it was too soon. But if you want to be told what you want to hear, I'd say whenever you feel comfortable with it, not her. Here's something to think about, why would you want to begin such a commitment when being engaged and getting married is only really about what the female wants? Because you could get married by the justice of the peace right now, pay the $40 or whatever cost for the license, and you're married. The entire process of engagement and marriage is just pandering to females if you want the truth. The females family used to pay the male and his family a dowry back in the day, and even now in some places because when you think about it, a female wasn't really worth anything but one less mouth to feed for her family. If the guy who married her was lucky, she'd give him sons. But it doesn't work that way anymore, even though there still isn't any social utility in paying a year's wages on an expensive ring, a place to say some meaningless vows, and feed everyone who comes. But I digress, just do what you want.
Depends on your age. I married my highschool sweetheart but not after being together for 7 years and having been living together for 5 of them. No regrets, we're as happy as we could be and have been married for 6 years now.
But I imagine if you're 40 you're not going to be waiting that long. Still, anything less than 2 years and not having any experience living together is insanity imo. Many people have a change of heart or get cold feet in the first couple of years of a relationship.
>>768026214
I’m 35, she’s 20
>>768026040
Brooke?
>>768026302
>15 year difference
How do you have any common interests outside of fucking?
about this much OP
>>768026470
We have pretty much everything in common, talked for months before getting together
>>768026512
too soon
such a sad story
Whenever your ready and if it feels right. Asked my gf to marry me after 4 months of dating. Had to wait a year because of church and now we've been married for 10yrs.
That ring is fake
>>768025015
I have the opposite problem. I've been with my gf for 5 years. I know she wants to get married, but I have doubts and aren't comfortable with it. I told her this and that we should break up. Then out of nowhere she says she doesn't care and just wants to be with me. She says she'll never bring it up again if I stay.
I don't really know what to believe or what to do
>>768025015
>ascends high ground
I wouldn't get married unless I was a 'fucking christian'
>>768026905
Okay? It’s not mine
>>768025015
Go through some fights. Get to the point that you and her reconsider even being together. If you survive that you’ll survive anything.
>>768026199
Lol you sound fucking sad
>>768027638
That and marriage is not a fairy tale. It is work with mutual benefits, support and connection.
>>768025991
Because breaking the arrangement will bring shame upon familes .
Not before 18 months, you need to get the phsycoface out of your system before you can make a clear-headed choice.
>>768025991
I think most arranged marriages last longer because in a lot of places they legally aren't allowed to divorce.
>>768025015
lol
getting married is for cucks only
>>768025015
>marriage
>when the legal scales are tilted against men stronger than ever before
You'd have to be a complete idiot to get married in the current year.
It depends on the people involved, my wife and I are both stubborn and are the kind of people who want to work things out and fix things here is our timeline
> Reply to my personal ad 2/01
> she is in Canada
> went to see her in person in 7/01
> secret proposal to her she said yes
> she came to live with me for 6 months
> official propose to her family 12/01
> got married 6/02
> still married with 2 kids
We are lucky, our personality fits each other and we work well together.
>>768025015
It is too soon when you have to ask /b/ wether it is too soon.
>>768026536
>pretty much
Nigga, leave her and let the poor girl have a life. You’ll be 45 when she’s 30. She’ll wake up and realize she married someone who’s most likely going to die long before she does. She’ll also realize soon there are better, stronger, younger and more successful men out there. Do yourselves both a favor and find a 30 year old ya fucking dummy.
>>768025522
Eh I got engaged at a year and a half lived together for 6 months prior been together 2 and a half years getting married next September
>>768025436
/thread tbh
>>768028400
CUCKED LUL
My gf dated for 5 years, shared a room in her parents hours for 2, and had our own house for 2. Then I proposed.
I still consider it early but definitely the best decision. If you can live for someone for 2 years in confinement as small as a bedroom WITH her parents, and still love her, than you are more than ready.
When shes still twelve.
>>768026040
Hate to break it to you anon, but she knew him for more than a month.
>>768025015
The only socially acceptable age to marry is when both partners are at least 24.
Make sure you're not more than 5-6 years apart or the neighbors will talk.
Remember it's all about what your coworkers/neighbors think. Don't bring shame upon your wife, family, self. Uphold yourself with the dignity a white person was born to bear.
>>768028225
This guy knows what's up. Once she hits 25 and your arthritis flares up, she'll take have your shit and love a comfortable life with someone her age. This bitch was born the same year Armageddon came out. We danced our high school homecoming dances to that fucking Aerosmith song. She was literally a newborn when you were doing that.
She's got daddy issues and that's fucking killer. Fuck that crazy girl sideways, but don't get hitched. You're betting half the shit you've ever earned on her having a granddaddy fetish in 10 years.
>>768030902
>arthritis at 40
Everyone at my job is engaged or have kids and they're in their early 20s
>>768031143
sounds like a lower income area
>>768025015
No less than a year living together. If you make it past a year living full time together you should be golden. I even tracked mine like a PI and bought her a cell phone so I could make sure she was true to her word. Been married for 10 years now.
>>768030847
this.
Please god let us return to pre 1970s morals.
>>768031749
Feminism has killed this idea of a perfect family.
>>768031909
Amen. Feminism not only destroyed familial bonds, it also left the West open to total cultural destruction.
>>768026302
Gross. Don't get engaged or married at all if you're that much of a manchild.
>>768028044
You'd have to be a complete idiot to think the same legal system applies everywhere.
>>768025015
Id say if she's 14.
>>768025015
3 years, counting from moving in together. It's the time it take for the passion from the beginning to fade so that both partner see each other as they really is, without the blind bias of unreasonable passion. You must have already fight a lot and go through the shit of life for awhile to be really sure that you can manage to go through the rest of it together.
>>768025015
always
marriage is a trap for men
>>768025015
Flip side, how long is too long?
>>768033151
Why do straight men feel like it's a trap? Just give up on monogamy. If you dumbass Wisconsinites would stop treating women as some sort of possession you wouldn't have this fucking problem. Step up your game.
>>768026957
Enjoy you common law marriage, only takes one signature to file it
>>768025015
I think engagement should only be a formality when you already know you’re getting married (and have a good idea of when the wedding will be). My parents dated for roughly 5 years before they got engaged, their engagement lasted a year, and they have the strongest relationship I know.
before 45, as a guy
before 9, as a girl
I wouldn't until 1 year and 6 months