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ITT: sexual stories thread

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Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

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ITT: sexual stories thread
In this thread sexual stories thread.
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I once banged a minor.
>drinking with small group of friends
>normally live in the next town over, but hanging out at friend's place
>everyone but me and my ex's roommate are passed out drunk
>"Hey anon, let's go crash at my place."
>"Alright, sounds good." - she's lesbian, don't think much of it
>we get to her place, porn dvds and dildos all over the livingroom
>"Yeah, don't mind those, anon, I was busy this afternoon."
>go to sleep on couch
>"Hey anon, want to sleep over here with me?"
>"Sounds good, be right there"
>get on the floor, etc etc, jk
>walk over and lay down next to her, sleep for maybe a couple hours
>"Hey anon, you awake?"
>Uhh, I am now.
>"I'm horny, anon. There's condoms over on the dresser there"
>licked and fucked a chubby lesbian
I touched penises with my friend when we were like 5 or 6. After sword fighting a couple times, he started sucking me. Then he moved away.
I once touched my genitalia in a pleasurable manner, I felt guilty afterward.
>be me

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>post prom
>my buddy's girl karina gets drunk
>pic related
>my bud is kinda drunk too and he wanted to keep talking to old friend so he asked me to take her home
>helped her in car, started driving her home
>eventually started making out with her
>feeling her amazing legs in her satin dress
>she pulls me into her house, barely make it through the door before we start making out again
>manage to hike up her dress and get her legs around my waist
>carry her to her bedroom
>lay her down with her dress up,she shows me her panties, moves them to the side
>Have her wet pussy in my hand
>dick pops through boxers
>push up and into her and just start pumping
>first time so barely lasted 30 seconds
>by the end i just pushed as deep as i can in her and came so hard
>how i lost my virginity

>fucken woman
>make come
> wowzies
No need. I already came. Thanks for that hot story!
No that was great. I finished jerking off 2 seconds after the start.

I have drug my dick through a ton of ugly/fat/gross/retarded/desperate girls through my life.
anyone want greentexts?
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This is now a spongebob thread.
>So, I found who was behind of it.
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God fucking damnit mods, ban this bot.
i cum now ok
>Been talking to a bunch of girls online for a while.
>They are various levels of desperate, purposely target girls who are ugly, fat, and obviously desperate.
>start chatting with one girl, she has a fucked up eye that drifted inward... bad skin, Fat as FUCK, but I can find something dickable about any chick.
>She had really big tits, and pouty dick sucking lips, also cute ass freckles despite the acne.
>convince her to meet me in a park near my place.
>meet up with her and instantly start hitting on her like we were talking online.
>we walk and talk for abit, all of my effort into not staring into that fucked up eye.
>It starts drifting, I'm internally dying because its kinda funny, but try not to laugh.
>get my hand to rest on her lower back, she seems so desperate for any kind of touch, she melts her chubby marshmellowy body into me.
>I ask her if she wants to go back to my place for a pizza and some netflix.
>She nods her head and I shit you not, her god damn eye like, moved with her nodding, like it looked up when her head was going down, then looked down when she raised her head.
>Was she doing this shit on purpose... no... she couldn't be.
>get her to my place
>take her coat and sit on the couch, hand rests on her shoulders and I pull her in close as I fire up the roku.
>Go on Amazon prime, load up Army of Darkness.
>She says "Oh shit, this is my favorite movie."
>No fucking shit it is, shes got pictures of herself in Evil Dead T-shirts.
>I am hard as a rock, rubbing her shoulder a bit.
>I whisper how sexy I think she is, shes blushing as red as a fucking tomato.
>she eventually says she finds me very attractive.
>lean down toward her, ask her if I can kiss her.
thanks you
>We're making out
>I pop one of her tits out of her top and grab it, rubbing it.
>She pulls away from kissing me and says "Fuck that feels good... I want you so fucking badly."
>that fucking eye is looking at the fucking upper corner of the room.
>it shifts to looking off to the right, whatever, fuck it.
>Undo my pants and feel her hand grip my dick
>Hard, throbbing in her hand as she leans down and starts sucking me.
>Her lipstick smears all over my dick, I hold onto her head, my shaft throbbing as she sucks me... bare.
>Lay her down on the bed, open her legs, her pussy shaved and smooth.
>I push my dick in, still bareback, and start pumping into her hard.
>Her eyes are open, that fucking eye keeps moving up and down while I pump into her.
>Now it just makes me fucking harder... she moans, loudly, telling me to keep fucking her.
>I start to get tired, sit on the couch, she gets up and sits on my dick, sliding me back into her pussy.
>Shes a heavy girl, so its a bit awkward, I have to lay down pretty far so she can ride me.
>Cock deep into that hot pussy, balls tightening up.
>Tell her I'm going to nut, she pulls off and stands up.
>she wants to take a break and sits next to me on the couch, stroking my dick.
>waiting for it to calm down a bit.
>tell her to go get me a beer.
>she gets up and I smack her on her cellulite covered ass.
>she giggles and looks over her shoulder at me.
>then walks into the kitchen, grabs me a beer and brings it to me.
>I sit back and feel her lips on my dick.
>My cock is just throbbing to bust, so I tell her to be easy, that I'm still primed to nut.
>She giggles a bit and keeps sucking me while I drink.
>I look down at her and her eye has drifted to looking down at the floor.
>She looks up at me with my dick in her mouth, her eye stared further down at the floor.
>She pulls up and says "You have one tasty dick." I smile and give her a sip of my beer before she slides her lips down my dick again.
>I tell her to stop because I'm about to Klaatu Barada Nut in her mouth.
>she just giggles and bobs fast on my dick, forcing me to nut hard in her mouth.
>She sucks me until I get limp, she gets up and sits on the couch, we sit there naked and sweaty.
>Get the idea to fuck in the shower after the movie
>Shes so fat we can't both fit
>Can see this is upsetting her
>take her to my bedroom and bend her over and fuck her hard.
>I keep imagining her eye bouncing while I fuck her, like its a googly eye.
>Can feel myself about to nut, pull out and cum on her back.

I still fuck her every so often
>Klaatu barada nut
11/10 story anon. Thanks for that.
I once banged a miner
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So did I...She was 10

I was around 7 years older than her.
A miner once banged me
I have more, I've fucked and am fucking many a desperate girl.
And a banger once mined me. Shit was cash.
I put my dick in a vagina and busted on her back. The end.
Took my wife's fucked up sisters virginity. She was living with us while she went to high school because she was kicked out of her parents. Got her drunk and she blew me while wife was asleep in other room. Went out to my garage and fucked on the couch. Only reason I did it is because I knew I could get away with hit. Chick had cried wolf way too many times for my wife to believe anything she said. Feels good guys
>be me
>Sitting with hick girlfriend in parents bedroom
tv in the living room was broken
>We watch varsity blues because Hicktown usa
>had to sit on the edge of the bed because parents didn't trust me
>Thats just how i like it.jpeg
>Girlfriend is tucked under covers
>parents leave to go over to girlfriends grandparents crossed the street
>Welcome to hickville.wav
>still sitting at the foot of the bed
>girlfriend gets out from under the covers
>she sneaks up behind me somehow must be the movie damn its good.jpeg
>While she sneaks up behind me I hear the rustling of the covers for a split second
>then before I could react she has her nose buried in my neck and rubs my dick
>things get really hot
>its happening.gif
>I pull her by the hair and spin my self around
>she yelps a little
>I slide my hands from her hair to her neck
>her neck to her shoulders
>her shoulders to her waist
>I'm fully on the bed at this point
>I pick her up by the waist and then slide her panties off
>I eat her out for about 5 minutes until she says it
> the magic words
>"I want you to fuck me anon"
>I pounce into action and pull my dick out
>I rub up against her
>But then the 5 words you don't want to hear when you are in the moment come out of her mouth
>"Uh Anon, do you have a condom?
>Fuck my life.jpeg
>I forgot to buy condoms
>then a stroke of genius explodes from my adrenaline filled mind
> I open up the side table drawer and behold
> Its a Trojan ENZ condom
> I slip it on and have the most passionate sex of my life
>It feels great
>I cum on her tits and that was it
>we went right back to watching the movie
>I was under the covers with her finally
>All she could do was just hold on to me
>It was one of the best times I have had with her in my life
>we were both virgins
>She passed away a few years later 02/01/2014
>It was her birthday
>She was the most amazing woman I have ever met
>She would have been the one
>I miss you
Thats all I just kinda wanted to vent.
Anyone have moar of this girl?
Hilarious writing. Thanks.
I once fingered A minor
Hey, sorry.
Thread replies: 37
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