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H-hey Anonymous! It's t-that time of the week again! We

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 379
Thread images: 135
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H-hey Anonymous! It's t-that time of the week again!
Welcome to cooking with Alice3D! 4chan's only OC based cooking instruction thread!
And let's face it, the only real OC on /b/ or /bant/.

S-so come, sit down, h-have a delicious home cooked meal, from my kitchen (and heart) t-to you <4
https://vocaroo.com/i/s1F2ylFy86Cx (embed)
>>
ayyyyy bb you look nice today
>>
>>767682185

its not OC if you just do the same shit every week. log threads wouldn't be OC if they just time stamped their shit each week.
>>
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I've been waiting for this!
>>
i cant jerk off to this
>>
You should wear a bikini again sometime.
>>
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>>767682244
T-thank you very much!

>>767682312
I d-do different things every day dear <4

>>767682366
When it's w-warm out maybe!

>>767682355
ME TOO!
>>
Heya Alice C:

-Raine
>>
>>767682185
happy birthday to nano!
>>
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>>767682440
H-hello dear!


>>767682443
Baaaark~


Alright, let's go over todays meal plan.
P-pulled chicken! Like pulled pork, b-but healthier!

https://vocaroo.com/i/s00KqhxgkG0f
>>
>>767682393
Isn't it possible to wear whatever you want inside?

Pop that outfit off, throw on a good looking bikini. It'd make my day.
>>
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N-Now for the special ingredient!
>>
Finally time to cook nano.
>>
>>767682508
T-the outfit h-has to fit the MOOD d-dear.

>>767682528
now I see why it took you so long.
>>
>>767682185
No one cares about you or your stupid show. Do something with your life instead of being an attention whore doing stuff that requires 0 talent, thus making your audience a bunch of desperate white knight losers.

- a butthurt autist
>>
>>767682564
I disagree it's always a good time to wear something good looking.
>>
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>>767682491
alice will you wear something like this again?
>>
>>767682631
S-sorry, I'm not an attention whore <4

>>767682652
P-probably <4 S-should I set up a way for p-people to suggest outfits?

>>767682646
I l-look good in anything, darling~
>>
is this some guerilla tactic to make all the incels and failures of 4chan better humans to avoid future columbines?
If so, that's genius and should be b-b-b-bumped.
>>
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Alright m-my loves, l-let us look at the ingredients list.

It's basically chicken, spices, hot sauce, and kaiser rolls. Not hard, should be very cheap.

https://vocaroo.com/i/s1vSBlvvGMeG
>>
>>767682688
While true, there's certain outfits that look better than others.
>>
>>767682491
This had better be some real barbecue and not some oven-baked bullshit
>>
>>767682688
Make something keto friendly, Alice.
Trying to lose weight here.
>>
>>767682688
yes please
>>767682652
this outfit is super sexy
>>
>>767682185
Hello sir.
>>
yay!
>>
what is this high velocity roleplaying
>>
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>>767682807
It's oven b-baked, I don't own a BBQ.

>>767682819
T-then you should know high fat and high carb diets are b-basically equal for long term weight loss <4

>>767682802
*shrugs* T-that's subjective.

After all, I don't think I look good at all <4

>>767682898
I'm a g-girl dear <4

>>767682840
Hm hm hm. H-how should I do it? I do h-have a wish list, b-but it's not like I can't afford m-my own clothes....

>>767682942
L-love and cheer <4
>>
>>767682966
whats your wishlist? link?
>>
>>767682185

cook a nigger then rape the dish
>>
>>767682688
You always look good in anything~
>>
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>>
>>767682966
>I don't own a BBQ.
Well get one! What else are you gonna do with those patreon bucks?
>>
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>>767683039
I'll h-have to find it...all I h-have on hand is my patreon, and t-that doesn't really fit...

>>767683091
Thank you b-but I respectfully disagree <4

>>767683071
Why?
>>
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>>767682966
Silly Alice, you're beautiful!

Also if you're going to take outfit suggestions, when can we see this sexy outfit again?
>>
What's with the stuttering in the writing?
Is OP mildly retarded?
>>
this site is the best shit ever... whenever i wanna laugh i come here and read these comments from the most pathetic people on the planet. youre all fucking hysterical. please dont ever change.
>>
Could it be ?
Fucking genuine OC ?
On /b/ ?
Bumping this shit
>>
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>>767683095
I m-mostly spend them on groceries for anons.


Moving on, h-here is your first steps: Season the chicken, drown it in hot sauce, and let it sit for a bit

https://vocaroo.com/i/s1hDvO5v2cdf
>>
alice is a dude, but how cute is she/he? has anyone seen a face or dick?
>>
>>767683190
How new are you
>>
>>767683199
link to patreon?
>>
>>767683116
<4 I agree with your disagreement
>>
I'm fapping to your pictures. I'm so sorry.
>>
>>767683117
I'll l-look for it, I t-think I put it away....

>>767683190
T-that's me!

>>767683178
That includes you d-darling <4

>>767683207
I'm a biological female.

>>767683133
W-what's up with your lack of stuttering!

>>767683232
V-very.

>>767683250
H-here is all my contact infos:

Email: [email protected]
Skype: alicemargatroid2
Steam: Aneki Margatroid or rukiarcx
Patreon: alicemargatroid
Twitter, Twitch, Youtube, PSN, XBOX LIve, NintendoNetwork, KIK: celtyplays
Instagram: nanopup
and of course, my chat: https://anekiho.me/chat2
>>
>>767683286
Thanks for the info!
>>
>>767683133
t.attentishuns
>>
Alice what sort of wine would pair well with this dish?
>>
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taking requests for custom animated gifs
>>
>>767683232
He's probably not new, just old enough to understand that even this is better than all the trash that is reposted constantly on /b/.
>>
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sadly I can't spam your shitty "oc" today darling
that makes me sad
>>
>>767683207
she's actually a girl but her dick's like a foot long. she lets me taste it sometimes.
>>
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>>767683330
M-my pleasure.


And h-here is the second set of instructions: boil the sauce till its good and d-done, then dunk the chicken! Easy!

https://vocaroo.com/i/s0l9qXb9kvfy
>>
>>767683352
loss mem?
>>
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>>767683342
nice nuts. I would suggest a riesling, personally.
>>
>>767683342
G-given the very consent of "wine pairings" h-has been scientifically challenges, I'll g-go with "whatever gets you drunk fastest".

>>767683361
*blinks* And w-who are you again?
>>
>>767683407
what?
>>
>>767683402
Your voice is also cute!
>>
Bump for not cancer
>>
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cant stop stroking fuuuuck
>>
>>767683451
Oh is t-that what they were? I t-thought they were too small....but I suppose that's just how some males are.

>>767683506
I w-worked very hard on it <4
>>
>>767682185
Why do you type stutters but don't stutter in the vocaroo?

ur gay lmao
>>
>>767683534
You h-have some odd tastes....

>>767683554
Why d-do you spell some words correctly and n-not others?

>>767683524
Thank y-you <4
>>
>>767683402
are we currently inside a world which is entirely a figment of my imagination? Are you all in an extremely developed inception-esque world whose sole identity is me?
>>
>>767683451
>>767683472
Ok thanks dudes.
>>
>>767683582
Why do you pretend to be a girl?

I know, I've seen your penis.
>>
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Alright h-here comes the best part of the show: The webm's in w-which you guys make fun of me f-for having nerve damage and t-therefore cutting things very awkwardly!

First up, garlic!
https://vocaroo.com/i/s18WUZNtf1Sb
>>
>>767683535
Balls vary in size, There's no shame in having small balls dear.
>>
>>767683668
>what stuttering?

see >>767683582

>You h-have

>Why d-do you

>Thank y-you
>>
>>767683605
Nope!

>>767683668
R-right?

>>767683669
I d-don't pretend <4 I am a b-biological female.
So where is this dick pic?

>>767683725
I n-never said there was a shame in it <4
Just that I didn't realize.

>>767683729
I d-don't see it.
>>
Let's see that butthole Alice
>>
>>767683705
Look at that gross nerve damage and awkward cutting.
>>
>>767683582
Do more voca.
Your slightly nerdy mumble is comfy.
>>
>>767683772
Serious question alice would you fuck a nigger?
>>
>>767683772
So the "alice3d" with brunette hair isn't you?
>>
>>767683354
I just assumed these threads died, has been a while since I saw the last one.
Anything is better than the ig/fb wankfest, I get the occasional porn but its just ridiculous now.
>>767683232
>pic related
>>
Hey, Alice. Can I have a hug?
>>
>>767683705
How'd you damage your nerves?
>>
>>767683801
I f-fucking called it!
>>
>>767683801
exactly my thoughts

>absolutely horrendous technique. This may be the most vile thing I have ever witnessed.
>>
>>767682185
You again? Why do you do this? Need help? My girlfriend is psychologist
>>
>>767682185
I want to snifff youuu
>>
>>767683534
Jesus Christ those knobbly knees....
>>
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>>767683828
T-the blond hair is a wig dear.
>>
>>767683830
L-love never dies <4
>>
>>767683910
I know. I'm asking if the "alice3d" with brunette hair is you. the nudes. The ones with the laptop.
>>
>>767683872
*hugs extra hard*

>>767683877
Burn damage.

>>767683887
H-how interesting! So am I. I also am bi, s-so for sure, hook me up <4
>>
>>767683938
Will you marry me?
>>
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-squarefag
ill be right back!

ill take the requests when i get back!
>>
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>>767682185
Omg! It's so good to see you!!
>>
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>>767683984
*blinks slowly* I've n-never seen such pictures. P-please show me.
>>
>>767683881
Your cutting actually doesn't look bad today. But since you were asking for it, I had to give you what you wanted.
>>
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>>767684020
R-right back atcha~

>>767684045
fffff
>>
>>767683858
>>767683938
>>767684020
Cutes
>>
>>767683286
Pull the dress out. It's very nice and you look good in it.
>>
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Alice, show us your boobs
>>
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>>767683985
How'd it get burned HOW'D IT GET BURNED?!?!?
>>
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>>767684105
M-maybe one day <4


N-next up, cutting onions!
I've h-heard all sorts of ways t-to stop onions f-from making you cry, b-but doesn't each of us n-need a good cry now and again?

I sure did.
https://vocaroo.com/i/s0fgdUB9qY6R
>>
>>767683830
>has been a while since I saw the last one.
Same here. Seems like ages.

>>767683286
Good to see you back Alice.

>>767683116
>Thank you b-but I respectfully disagree <4
Well, it's ok to be wrong sometimes.
>>
anyone have more alice pictures i can jerk it to?
>>
>>767684185
You're a cute, cute!
>>
>>767683938
Tolerance at best.
But hey, OC is OC, who am I to judge.
>>767684034
See, he gets it
>>
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>>767683705
>>
Put a damp towel under your cutting board so it doesn't slide while you use it
>>
>>767684249
I w-was here last week you know <4

>>767684265
If y-you sub up on m-my patreon, you g-get a high def version of one of m-my old threads once a day!

>>767684276
T-those were both me.
>>
>>767682185
What the hell did I just stumble upon??

Haven't visited /b/ in some time and return to a repeating cooking thread thing? Wut?
>>
>>767684338
I'll t-try that next time <4

>>767684354
I've b-been doing this for three years. Lurk moar.
>>
>>767684354
I don't think Alice does repeats?
>>
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>>767684354
you stumbled upon a kind person
>>
>>767683772
Alice Let's see you pull your butt cheeks apart
>>
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>>767684034
I think it is you. I can't find them right now but you're in the same maid outfit thing.

Also you can really tell in this pic.
>>
>>767683985
>H-how interesting! So am I. I also am bi, s-so for sure, hook me up <4

What do you mean with hooke me up? Sorry I'm not a native in english
>>
>>767684342
does it matter how much i donate?
>>
>>767684533
No t-thank you <4


On w-with the show!
Next s-step is to season the chicken!
Make s-sure to get it nice and evenly coated <4

https://vocaroo.com/i/s0SGjm9RopdZ
>>
>>767683705
HOLY SHIT I HAVE THAT SAME JAR THING OFF AMAZON.
>>
>>767684406
What's the schedule? cause I haven't seen you in a while.
Great to see OC that isn't some dudes wife getting plowed by some other guy.
>>
>>767684406
Some time = just about 3 years.
Why /b/ and not /ck/?
>>
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lets all gangbang alice and make her our toy
>>
>>767684565
You're perfect
>>
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>>767683669
orly?
>>
>>767684591
J-just a dollar is enough, I think <4 I've g-got some hilarious stuff /b/tards have r-requested though.

>>767684614
YAY

>>767684582
It means I want to fuck her.
>
>>
>>767683984
Post nudes
>>
>>767684582
Alice is trying to steal your girl.

That's how she do.
>>
>>767684624
H-here, check here:
https://www.patreon.com/alicemargatroid

>>767684637
B-because /b/ is m-my home and I am Alice <4
>>
>>767684673
Link patreon
>>
>>767684603
Alice has a cute mole on her bicep!
>>
>>767684742
https://www.patreon.com/alicemargatroid

>>767684746
H-hey, don't look so closely, I'll g-get embarrassed.
>>
>>767684726
That's a big 10-4.
>>
I still think it's stupid af to type stuttering. This meme is stale and gay.
>>
>>767684673
>>767684686

WHAT THE FUCK?
Well, I'm sorry, but I live in Brazil, and it wouldn't be possible.
>>
>>767684648
That's a bit much.

I kinda just want to cuddle with Alice.
>>
>>767684726
I would move out if /b/ is your home.
The neighborhood is going to shit.
>>
>>767684673
ALICE PULL THEM CHEEKS APART LIKE YOU DO DEM CHICKEN BREASTS GIRL AYY
>>
>>767684842
I t-think it's stupid as fuck to say "af" t-to mean "as fuck".

>>767684843
Oh t-trust me. I l-love the tan ones.
>>
>>767684842
I have to agree
>>
>>767684873
They're similar in that both will never happen.
>>
>>767684811
I did some digging and apparently you're the "fake" Alice that took up the persona.

this is a man, anons.
>>
>>767684342
>I w-was here last week you know <4
I obviously missed you :(
Glad I've caught you today.
>>
>>767684905
I d-don't mind. Just m-means it's my responsibility to help out <4


Next step, we gotta water down the onion; it'll be t-too strong without a bit mixed in <4

As a child, I ate a whole raw onion. I'm not sure why, but I do remember it was awful. Don't do that.

https://vocaroo.com/i/s1zEnuz2t3nW
>>
>>767684726
Uh huh.
That's nice.
Whatever.

I already don't like you
>>
>>767682366
Wait, does that mean it's been confirmed that Alice doesn't have man-parts?
>>
>>767684958
That's true. Still not down for a gangbang though.
>>
>>767685050
Really looking at that 100 a month
>>
>>767684960
*blinks* Exactly w-where did you do digging? ED?
S-someone already posted a picture of m-my vulva basically exposed. Try lurking more <4

>>767685031
I d-do it at the same time every week <4

>>767685059
Correct.
>>
>>767682652
With those clothes, chance of being a tranny is 98%
>>
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>>767684960
Wrong.
>>
>>767684918
Wow you like us? well this is another problem, here in Brazil people aren't all tan. Actually my girlfriend is as white and blond as you, but I'm tan
>>
>>767685050
>As a child, I ate a whole raw onion. I'm not sure why, but I do remember it was awful. Don't do that.
but thats the proper way to eat onion
>>
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>>
200 bucks a month fuck i could fap to that nice patreon baby
>>
>>767685050
My grandma used to eat onions like they were apples all the time. She was tough as nails though.
>>
>>767685145
Alice why was your vulva exposed?
>>
>>767685146
>With those clothes, chance of being a tranny is 98%
even if that was true, most here would still tap it
>>
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>>
>>767684918
>4chan's only OC based cooking instruction thread!
yeah because abbreviating shit is so stupid...either way, it isn't nearly as stupid as taking the time to articulate a stutter.
>>
>>767685207
W-wow! Good!


Alright n-next step!
Add t-the BBQ sauce and vinegar t-to get it nice and tangy <4

https://vocaroo.com/i/s0dUPI7rgxH6
>>
>>767685145
>vulva basically exposed

No, your penis is just tiny. I wish i could dig up those pics again.
>>
Alice, when was the last time you experienced an episode of flatulence?
>>
Alice needs to serve a day in the box for being the badgirl of /b/
>>
>>767682185
Daily reminder for all those newfags. Alice is a man.
>>
>>767685208
>I'm asian d-dear <4

But you have the pale complexion of a corpse.
>>
>>767685273
>>
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>>767685050
Chad onion eater
>>
lets see that vulva
>>
>>767685208
Asian? cool but I need to sleep, good bye Alice it was a nice talk
>>
>>767685208
Alice is from Romania you filthy fucking casual
>>
>>767685305
Should I jizz in it during this step?
>>
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>>767685364
>>
>>767685146
Don't use slurs, Anon. It isn't nice and makes people not value your opinions. If you keep reinforcing the violent rhetoric against trans people, I'm going to bite your nuts in half.

That's right, not off, because that wouldn't be biting your nuts, it would just be biting your scrotum, which would probably hurt a lot less. I imagine having your nuts bitten in half would be way worse.

>>767685145
>S-someone already posted a picture of m-my vulva basically exposed.
I sure hope you weren't in a sub-zero environment at the time. Let me tell you a story why.
>>
>>767682185
Just show your dick already
>>
>>767685249
D-didn't realize my cat suit w-was so tight.

>>767685323
T-they are literally in this thread. T-try harder.

>>767685361
S-sorry, I'm not <4

>>767685363
T-that's because I'm t-three seconds from t-turning into one <4

>>767685413
S-sleep tight!

>>767685399
Scroll up.

>>767685421
Germany, t-try again.
>>
>>767685305
I know what bbq sauce that is.
>>
>>767685429
>>
>>767684135
^ this
>>
>>767684135
'She' won't because 'she' is a dude.
>>
>>767685477
"Bucharest" is literally in her title. You're not Alice at all... You're a great big phoney!
>>
>>767685477
Oh.

That's not exposure, that's just a camel-toe.

That's nothing compared to actually seeing it.
>>
>>767685182
Zero obviously.
I know an entitled attention whore when I see one.
>>
>>767685477
Its not posted here. stop trolling nigger
>>
A what point does she get naked?
>>
>>767682185
kill yourself alice, my guy
>>
N-now comes the hard p-part, for me at least.
Pull the chicken to pieces!

T-this took a lot of strength out of m-me, sadly.
https://vocaroo.com/i/s1Ei67PiNHI5
>>
>>767685477
>T-that's because I'm t-three seconds from t-turning into one <4

Don't die, Alice.
>>
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>>767685482
>>
>>767685208
>I'm asian d-dear <4

That proves it. It is you. The alice nudes i mentioned were of a (korean?") trap.

Unfortunately it seems they have been purged from the internet
>>
>>767685612
Nah, they're still floating around. You can check some archives of older Alice threads. They have a few pictures of him before he even went full autism with this Alice shit.
>>
>>767685305
I like what you're doing, good luck!
Next stop 1,000,000!
>>
>>767685612
good point, there's only one asian person in the world.
>>
Pull your butt cheeks apart next
>>
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>>767685606
>>
>>767685719
Man, he's really good at running that China scam then.
>>
>>767685719
Another "Alice" with the exact same maid outfit, and blonde wig?
>>
>>767685713
>calling someone a retard
>types like a gamer girl as if she's RPing
neck yourself attention whore.
you're only good for fucking.
>>
>>767685612
S-sorry, I'm not a trap <4

>>767685690
T-they don't, because I've always b-been a biological female, b-but okay.

>>767685704
I'll t-try!
>>
Can you vocaroo this?
>I am smokin' on that gas, life should be on Cinemax
>Movie, bought my boo bigger tits and a bigger ass
>Who he’s? Not I, I smoke strong; that Popeye
>Louie V’s in my archives, black diamonds; apartheid
>Bread up and my top down, on the block with a block out
>Hit your ass with that bla-kow, dope enough to go in yo' nostrils
>I take your girl and kidnap her, feed her to my mattress
>A skeleton in my closet, it's probably one of these dead-ass rappers
>It's probably one of these pussy-ass niggas, don't try me, I'll pull that trigger
>Got your car note in my cup, and your rent in my Swisher
>That pussy so good I miss ya, head game's so vicious
>And all I get is cheese, like I’m takin' pictures
>>
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>>767685808
>>
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>>767685808
>>
>>767685862
S-sorry, not an attention whore <4
Not my fault you can't scroll up.

>>767685845
Given I d-don't have a dick, apparently.
Check this:
>>767684666
>>
>>767685865
Alice you could stop this if you would prove with pictures that you are a girl(girl)[not boy]
>>
>>767684185
Your cutting technique is cute. Cute!
>>
>>767685883
BUMP
>>
>>767682185
Hey so im an English fag and I've followed a few of your threads, is there any chance you can do a cottage pie and gravy? I don't know if Americans eat it but its a real dish
>>
>>767685845
The outfit and wig aren't unique to her. I'm pretty sure she got them off the internet.
>>
Hi yo, Alice.
>>
>>767685865
Do you get tired of every single thread being half full of people calling you a man and half full of people fapping to you?
>>
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>>767685920
Already d-did so, scroll up.

>>767685928
G-good!


Alright, n-next step is easy! Simmer!
https://vocaroo.com/i/s0Ram173rUQ7
>>
>>767685902
not my fault you can't find attention another way.
enjoy your hordes of orbiters. zero dignity kek
>>
>>767685902
Clearly a tuck job, faggot.
>>
>>767685966
>t. orbiter
>>
>>767685899
>>
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>>767686031
>>
>>767685966
I'm not doing either of those things.
>>
>>767685945
Email m-me a recipe at [email protected] and I'll s-see what I can do <4

>>767685961
Yo~

>>767685966
T-that's my secret.
I'm always tired.

>>767686004
S-sorry, I don't l-like attention <4

>>767686010
Try harder <4 You c-can't tuck a vulva.
>>
Reminder this is a mentally ill man that bullied an underage girl into sex roleplay

also claims he was "internet raped"
>>
>>767686004
Thanks for the bump cunt.
>>
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>>
>>767686086
What are you, gay?
>>
>>767685945
Fellow Englishfag here. Good choice /b/ro.
>>
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>>767686082
>>
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>>
>>767686082
They're not even big, and they look like turds lmao
>>
Isn't this a guy
>>
>>767686116
P-pretty sure I n-never claimed that. Citation needed.


Next step! Add b-back the chicken s-so it gets nice and soaked~

https://vocaroo.com/i/s0iXY4k3RsCW
>>
>>767686125
Looks like I already pissed off one of your orbiters.

>what is sage

stay mad, kid
>>
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ITT: We have two sides. One's that like food and ones that can't read threads.
>>
>>767686130
>>
>>767685977
thanks for stopping by and make this website less garbage, I gotta make my family dinner. bye
>>
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>>767686147
>>
>>767686135
No, just depressed. Plus, I need something more explicit than what Alice delivers to get off.
>>
>>767686116
Do you know where you are newfag?
Nobody fucking cares. Kys.
>>
Hey Alice, can you give me some pulled chicken?
>>
>>767686171
this is when he faked having burned hands for attention

>>767686181
k
>>
>>767686116
wait are you talking about Ikarous? Cuz that never happened, ikarous just made it up
>>
>>767686290
That's Ikarous not Alice you retard
>>
>>767686252
Suck "Alice's" tucked dick some more orbiter faggot.
>>
What is all this anime and is it worth my time?
>>
why does alice look like she just survived the holocaust?
>>
>>767686244
There's nothing more explicit than the true love Alice radiates!
>>
>>767686319
yeah i messed up my wording
>>
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>>767686241
>>
Alice is a dude. Until is see evidence suggesting otherwise, guilty as charged.
>inb4 lurk, scroll up, hurrr
>>
>>767686321
Thanks for the bump, cunt.
>>
>>767686356
then you are insulting the wrong person you retard
>>
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Dear Alice,

Did you ever actually have a stutter?

Follow up question if you did, how long did it take for you to fix it? I had a stutter when I was younger, took me around six years of therapy to fix.

Do you think the stuttering is cute? Not gonna lie, I think due to my past with I find stutters endearing. Sort of like when a foreigner is trying to speak english but it's incredibly broken and accented.
>>
>>767686343
She's basically a corpse.
>>767686353
Love and lust aren't the same thing. Why would love make me want to jack off?
>>
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>>767686373
>>
>>767686439
They don't.. you can listen/watch his faggot ass streams when he does them.
>>
When did you first start cooking Alice?
>>
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>>767686406
I've already p-posted evidence, you are j-just delusional at this point <4


Alright, n-next step is my favorite!
Add cheese! Yum!

https://vocaroo.com/i/s02b9sYSN5sd
>>
>>767682652
I just came to this outfit.
>>
>>767686464
S-sorry, you must have the wrong stream <4 I'm a b-biological female.

>>767686467
Around....5-6 years ago, w-when my good friend Dean helped me <4
>>
>>767685434
OK, so I'm in the crimefighting lifestyle (yeah, not business, lifestyle, I don't associate with capitalists) and one time, a female superhero I was teaming up with made the poor decision of wearing a very scantily-clad costume when we were going to fight evildoers in the arctic.

To this day, I don't know why she thought it was a good idea. I knew I should have talked her out of it, but I didn't want to look like a male pig, telling a strong, independent woman what she can and can't wear.

Well, when we arrived in the arctic, the villains seemed to have anticipated her choice of attire, because they had brought super soakers. I'm not sure how the water stayed liquid in such a cold environment, perhaps they had patented some sort of sinister anti-freezing technology.

Anyway, one of them landed a sneak attack on us and used their soaking weaponry to fire a cheeky jet of water into her nearly-exposed asscrack. I took the initiative, grabbing her and diving behind a snow bank for cover. We got her out of the now-waterlogged g-string she had on. We thought we were on top of the situation again, but I had fallen right into their trap.

Their were several of them behind the snow bank, must have been at least a dozen. The leader, who had an evil mustache, pulled out a dial and snickered, which made the others laugh. He turned the dial up to full and their water guns glowed with a terrible energy.

We were too stunned to act, and they all used their weapons in a perfectly coordinated attack, delivering a massive water attack up her skirt and, you guessed it, into her vagina. The stream of water kept going for a good 20 seconds, and when it finally ended she dropped to the ground and let out a defeated, sultry moan.

Her vulva was freezing shut too quick for me to do anything about it. She was clearly in a lot of pain and was squirming a lot, which made some of the water shot into her ass earlier squirt out. This truly was her darkest hour.
>>
>>767686406
Lies about being a chick are the least of it.

few of the cancerous fag's claims: genius level programmer, got into college at 17, lost friends in the Japan tsunami, being stabbed by mother
>>
>>767682185
T-this s-hit i-is s-so f-fucking c-cancer p-please f-fucking s-stop.
>>
>>767686488
G-give me some, Alice!
>>
>>767685902
in fairness, that could be anyone. there is no kitchen background or aliceface in that webm
>>
Alice, have you ever become actual close friends with somebody from here? Or do you prefer not to take that kind of risk?
>>
>>767686460
>>
>>767686448
I don't know maybe I'm just too stunted to tell the difference.
>>
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>>
>>767686595
Puffy
>>
>>767686554
C-can't stop, won't s-stop <4

>>767686563
I've g-got a whole chat f-full of friends dear: https://anekiho.me/chat2

>>767686562
D-dear, that's...that's m-my green screen. I use t-those for Tea and Celty threads.

>>767686556
C-can do! Here we go! T-tell me how it is fams!

https://vocaroo.com/i/s0UxKU2OKhWe
>>
>>767686595
that is pretty clearly a female vulva
>>
>>767686595
that's a woman wut r u on
>>
>>767686544
that's sad.
seeking attention as a female on /b/ is one thing
but lying about shit like that to boost ones ego
kek
and this person deems themselves worthy of helping others?
and how fucking old is this person? they look like they are in their late 20s, early 30s, acting like this. maybe the tide pod generation isn't so bad afterall.
>>
>>767686595
What are you trying to prove, crackpot? If anything, that's a cameltoe. Actually, I have a great story to tell about cameltoes.
>>
>>767686660
we can't tell your green screen from other's green screens
>>
>>767686660
Hows Captain Cripple legs doing these days?
>>
>>767686595
Nice.

Wonder if it's taken some dick before.
>>
>>767686696
except that they weren't lying and have proven their programming skills dozens of times over
>>
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>>767686660
>>
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>>767686660
Ahh, it's delicious! Thank you, Alice!
>>
Too bad your mother wasn't successful in her late-term abortion attempt.
>>
>>767686729
T-that's fair, but I p-post constantly; go look f-for it in the archive.

>>767686736
Great <4
>>
>>767686582
Love is a hard thing to understand if you don't have any experience with it.

But wanting to fuck someone and loving them aren't the same thing though they can overlap.
>>
>>767686788
He your lover?
>>
>>767686696
i think he's 26

>>767686748
script kiddie =// "genius programmer that has written code that is too complex for most professionals to comprehend"
>>
>>767686660
Whoa back the fuck up where did this macaroni come from?
>>
>>767686779
N-no thank you <4

>>767686784
Glad t-to hear it <4

>>767686786
Yes, m-much too bad <4


W-well, that was my thread darlings <4 I h-hope you had as good of a time as me!

https://vocaroo.com/i/s1iPGJCWGwra
>>
Hey lady, thanks for making this thread thing
I'm from /pol/ and I know toxic, and this board is lame

But your thread is fun
>>
>>767686824
right and she's the latter not the former
>>
>>767686788
I think this is the most wholesome content I've ever seen on b
>>
>>767686748
>t. orbiter in shining armor
programmers are being replaced by AI anyway. hurr durr i can type code all day.
It's no different than learning a second language. In fact, it's easier. I taught myself a lot of that when I was like, what, 13?
>>
>>767686852
Bye, Alice, see you later! Have a nice one
>>
>>767682185
Look how thick that dude's neck is, Jesus
>>
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>>767686852
>>
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>>767686745
>>767686702
>>767686682
>>767686674
>>767686650
Sure thing..
>>
>>767686702
Tell it?
>>
>>767686696
>and how fucking old is this person?

Alice is a baby. She's roughly 10 years old. Or close enough to make no difference.
>>
>>767686852
>not pepsi
Who the fuck are you and what have you done with Alice?
>>
alice is a man
>>
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>>767686858
Thanks for joining us!
>>
>>767686858
G-glad to have you <4

>>767686880
I t-try my best!


Anyway, that was my thread <4 I'll b-be leaving soon t-to set up my anime stream, w-which you can join at 10PM EST at https://vaughnlive.tv/thehotbox (if you want, no pressure).

If you h-have anything at all to send me, f-feel free to do so through t-the following channels <4

Email: [email protected]
Skype: alicemargatroid2
Steam: Aneki Margatroid or rukiarcx
Patreon: alicemargatroid
Twitter, Twitch, Youtube, PSN, XBOX LIve, NintendoNetwork, KIK: celtyplays
Instagram: nanopup
and of course, my chat: https://anekiho.me/chat2

L-love you all <4
>>
>>767686488
that food looks vile
>white people seasoning
>>
>>767686868
How gullible can you be? Do you believe the shit about having caffeine in an IV drip too?
>>
>>767686958
>patreon
and it's shilling

cringe
>>
Stop replying to the retarded trolls who think they're smarter than everyone else because they think they didn't fall for the dick trap. Honestly dont care if its a dude or a chick I'm just here for recipes
>>
>>767686948
and?
>>
>>767686958
Bye Alice! Take care <4
>>
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>>767686958
Have a good weekend, Alice!
Goodnight!
>>
>>767687054
You too!
>>
>>767687017
nigger you can get more educational recipes off facebook. you know, the sped up videos that everyone's mother shares on a daily basis? you're just finding an excuse to orbit a flat chested attention whore. lol
>>
>>767686987
/b/ does not exactly hum with original threads

At least she is doing something about it.
>>
>>767687071
>she
>>
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>>767686958
Thanks Alice
>>
>>767686977
don't forget he's "an infertile female"

yeah i think an infertile female that happens to have a penis is just called a man...
>>
>>767686882
*blinks slowly* So, I have a little bit of context for this actually, given I work as a programmer in finance. We use a lot of deep learning and algorithmic analysis for our code, for sure, but most of our code can't possibly be replaced by an AI.

We use high level description and domain specific languages when we can, but most of the world is simply too complex to model with any sort of generic AI; there always needs to be someone STEERING it.

For example, we have a RNN (recurrent neural network) that I actually helped design and program (I have GPGPU experience, so I was tapped to make a GPU server farm and write code for it). The point of the RNN is to help predict market values and many other variables given past behavior, to allow us to stream real time like data to our clients for asset classes that cannot possibly be priced in real time (takes too long, not enough data, etc).

While phenomenally useful for its job (predicting things in the 5 second to 10 minute range), if you try to push it further, the forecasts get less and less useful, much like weather forecasts in the 5 day to 10 day range.

Some things are inherently chaotic, and require human level analysis to process. Certainly, many things in this range WILL be replaced by AI eventually but...I feel safe in my job for this life time.
>>
>>767687131
/thread
>>
>>767687071
>hunger games
too bad too late
>>
>>767686942
I d-drank it all!

>>767686948
I'm not <4

>>767686971
S-sorry, /b/ is m-mostly white basement dwellers. G-gotta cater to your audience <4
>>
>>767687220
I've seen your streams
your dog is a piece of shit and you are a man
>>
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>>767686852
>all the love
>my infinite heart

PLEASE DON'T GO NOOOOOO
>>
>>767686987
M-made it because /b/tards asked f-for insane stuff <4 It's a j-joke, try harder

>>767687112
M-my pleasure <4

>>767687131
I d-don't have a penis, s-so try harder.
>>
>>767687238
S-sorry, I'm female <4

>>767687242
S-still here dear.
>>
>>767687238
What's your problem with Nano?
>>
>>767687259
>It's a j-joke, try harder
But you still keep it around... and post it in every thread.
>>
Vocaroochan here!

Man I love cooking! I think this is so unique and helpful!


I'm more of an advice giver but if I had a kitchen to myself I probably would have liked to do something like this!
>>
>>767686987
They need it to keep paying for that hormone therapy.
>>
>>767687301
It m-makes me laugh every time <4

>>767687307
Oh h-hello. I t-try to help people in Therapy Tea and General Advice t-threads <4

>>767687327
S-sorry, not on hormones (and if I was, I have health insurance). Try again <4
>>
>>767687275
NICE
>>
>>767687275
Are you one of those that call it a "clitty"?

Let me as this way, is your "clit" in the shape of a penis?
>>
Well, I dunno if you are a boy, a girl, a troll or whatever, but I can't deny your efforts to deliver this thread to us, and you have my thanks for it, Alice
>>
>>767687301
>>767687327
When has Alice ever begged for money? She's clearly keeping it around to troll you guys.

And you just keep falling for it.
>>
>>767687391
>she
Sure it is..
>>
>>767687068
>implying this isnt my first alice thread
>implying I care just cause its a girl
If i want to see tits other hundred of pics you shouldn't share threads or /soc/ also theres /ck/ but they dont post webms for each step usually but sure man believe whatever gives meaning to your life as you keep lurking on this thread to reveal the truth and calling out attention whores, I'm sure you rather have the mlp and log threads instead
>>
>>767687424
Show me that dick if you're so sure, my dude.
>>
>>767687350
Nice! It does feel good to help others out. Be it advice giving or cooking tips huh?

I won't lie. I enjoy helping others because it helps me too. Makes me feel useful
>>
>>767686925
Well, it involves the same woman as the frosted vagina story.
>>767686542
We were developing sleak, form-fitting armor so we could be protected in battle and still move efficiently. Now, "form-fitting" isn't supposed to mean "literally skin tight" but a little something went wrong.

The outfit she was testing was an alloy contained in a tiny box with a button. When you press the button, the alloy expands and wraps itself around your body to fit. This version would adjust itself for different body types. There were, of course, areas where it is a little looser, and it fits around your face like a mask, because you don't want your mouth and eyes covered.

However, she was using a prototype. This one wasn't meant to be used at all because it was completely skin-tight with no loose bits, and would completely cover the face. To make matters worse, this was an outdated version of a prototype where each outfit was designed for a specific body type. This one was meant for a body type a good deal smaller than hers.

When she pressed the button the alloy engulfed her, squeezing around her entire body with what must have been a violating tightness. I got a good look at her genitals and they looked like they were chiseled out of stone. Obviously, she couldn't see or breath, and once again, she fell to the floor and groaned.

We had to cut the thing off of her to allow her to breath, since the prototype wasn't designed to easily come off. Maybe she does these things on purpose.
>>
>>767687404
I thought the thread was over?
>>
>tfw can't eat pulled chicken with Alice
>>
>>767687587
I w-wish I felt the same way <4

>>767687600
It is <4 A g-good captain goes d-down with her ship!

>>767687651
W-why not?
>>
>>767687259
What would you do if somebody actually got the AntiHydrogen Account?
>>
>>767687600
The cooking portion is.
>>
>>767687729
c-cute
>>
>>767687676
Aww :(
I'm curious then. What do you exactly gain from it all?
>>
>>767687729
new phone. who dis?
>>
>>767687772
>What do you exactly gain from it all?

Alice never gives a satisfactory answer to this question and it's kind of pointless to think about it. Plus, it doesn't really matter.
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>>767687676
Alice, did you ever watch an anime called "Moonphase?" It was on funimation years back, when I was a kid. Idk, you give off the vibe
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>>767687821
Well i just don't understand someone just doing something mindlessly or without reason.
I mean there's a reason for everything right?
I mean I know i help others because it just feels good to do
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>>767687907
Probably because its a dude.
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-squarefag
back!
>>
How large is your Alice Margatroid image folder?
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whoever is posting the backlog should post it to imgur
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does alice3d have freckles?
>>
alice is still a man
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>>767687945
Your answer is kind of a non-answer that doesn't really answer the question. But like I said, it doesn't matter and I have no problem with how you choose to answer questions about your motives.

I've got several ideas of what it could be and that's enough for me.
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>>767687923
*blinks* F-first you say "gain", then you s-say reason. Are all reasons gains?

As w-well, what is the "reason" behind a decision m-made while, for example, having a s-seizure? People do mindless things all t-the time; you don't zone out?

I do this to help people. That's all. I don't need to benefit to do something for someone else; they are a human being, they need help, I can help them, no one else is here to do it.

If someone was about to step into the street, in front of a car, you wouldn't reach out?
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livestream?
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>>767687852
I'm just curious is all.
I'm hoping no one thought I meant it in a asshole-ish way.

Like I said I contribute to a lot of advice threads and help as many people as I can with their problems but I know I'm not just doing it "just because".
I do it because it makes me feel good. I enjoy the rewarding sense of helping others
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File: it was always me.gif (2 MB, 268x282) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
it was always me.gif
2 MB, 268x282
>>767687844
Checked.
Just me!
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404.
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>>767687936
>>767688079
I'm n-not, but okay <4

>>767688084
*shrugs* I d-doubt any of them are true.

>>767688097
I d-do it because they need help and I c-can help them.
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>>767688149
>and I c-can help them
BS.
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>>767688149
you reply to me every thread saying you're not a dude but provide no proof. I was once a believer, I had faith you indeed did not have a feminine benis but the proof is there. you are a man my guy
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>>767688149
Thank you for spending your day here Alice! <4
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>>767688149
>*shrugs* I d-doubt any of them are true.

You might be right. But if my ideas are wrong then you're probably someone that I need to destroy.
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>>767688245
Take care!
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>>767688085
>If someone was about to step into the street, in front of a car, you wouldn't reach out?

Well yea but I wouldn't consider that a "mindless" action.
I'm doing it because I don't want someone to get hurt and im actively aware of that
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>>767688266
good night my man