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>we're at wal-mart >i tell you to buy 3 things to

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>we're at wal-mart
>i tell you to buy 3 things to confuse or fuck with the cashier
>what do you buy?
>>
Baby shoes, condoms, and rope.
>>
Literally anything. They don’t give two shits what you buy. Worked there 8 years and we’d just talk shit about people trying to be funny. If you really wanna fuck with them, be polite and know how to use a fucking card/self check.
>>
>>767533219
bengay, condoms, bananas
>>
>>767533219
some Hot Cheetos, a lighter, and some new undies. thanks for paying for some of my shit anon, I needed it.
>>
>>767533219
Rice, Tampons, Red Dye
>>
>>767533371
no one cares faggot, this isnt based in reality. its about the idea of purchasing 3 unrelated items that ensue hilarity. so stop being such a fucking buzzkill and think of 3 awkward items to purchase at the same time. bitch.
>>
3 niggers
>>
Only time I've gotten a comment from a cashier I was buying rope, tape, gloves, flashlights, tarps, knife, machette, and a moving blanket.
"Should I be worried??"
"No, I've got my coupon book right here"
Good ol harbor freight.
>>
as a guy
tampons
girl underwear
magazine about traps
>>
3 packages of rollos.
>>
This will be fucking hilarious, guyzzzz. Like totally!!!!!!!

Fucking idiots like you have never had an original thought in your lives. Pathetic.

High school cunts.
>>
>Season 3 of CSI: Miami,
>an industrial sized bucket of rubber bands,
>and a dozen quarts of motor oil
>>
>>767534026
True faggot right here boys. never learned that we all die in the end.
>>
This sort of thing has been done before by far better retards than 4chan retards who won't deliver.

Faggots have just stumbled into the car park sniggering at what they thought would have been hilarious if only they had the balls to actually do anything.

You did nothing, faggots
>>
>>767533748
U mad bro
>>
>>767534277
no shit its been done before. how many fucking threads are going right now that have been done every single moment of every day for the past forever? FORGIB ME for trying to bring a little spontaneity to your "random" board.
>>
>>767534470

You've done nothing. You've brought nothing.

You asked the question 30 minutes ago and you've done nothing. How the fuck is that spontaneous?

Faggot never even left his basement
>>
>>767534470
Damn you suck a lot of dick
>>
>>767534444
Quads
>>
Gun
graduation cap n gown
walkman
>>
>>767533219
Barbeque sauce, an axe, baby stroller
>>
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>>767533371
You some kind of faggot or something? Cringe/10
>>
donuts, donut holes, glue
>>
>>767533219
Bleach
Ammonia
Gas mask
>>
>>767533219
large box of condoms
box of pins
issue of parenting magazine
>>
>>767534633
kek
>>
This fag is just looking for idea to post on his Facebook so all his friends think he is such a crazy guy. Living life on the edge
>>
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>>767533219
>Pokemon Booster Packs
>Bear Traps
>Lube

Walk out muttering 'gotta catch em all'
>>
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>>767533219
a CD, a cassette tape, duct tape

>ask the cashier "do you like CDs and tapes?"
>tell her "because you'll love when I tape my dick to your forehead so you can CD's nuts"
>>
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>>767533894
>Walmart
>magazine about traps
>>
>>767533219
diapers
a gun
bomb
>>
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>>767535049
>because Walmart sells bombs
>>
>>767533894
>magazine about traps

>>767535049
>bomb

Have you faggots ever shopped outside and offline once?
>>
>>767533219
>So...he was behind of it.
>>
Lube, zucchini, children's dolls
>>
>>767533219
I head over to McDonalds, buy a Big Mac, take the meat out, take the lettuce out, and then take the three parts to the cashier.
>>
>>767534633
underrated
>>
>>767533219
Lube, hack saw, baby toy
>>
Binoculars, a fake mustache, and a bucket hat
>>
rope, chair and ceiling fan
>>
>>767533219
A balloon
A container of lube
A MLP DVD
>>
>>767533219
anal lube, shop vac, and a set of billiard balls
>>
>>767533219
Chainsaw, tarp, vasoline
>>
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I feel like this thread would be better if we couldn't choose lube...
>>
>>767537237
fine, crisco
>>
>>767533219
>condoms
>sanitary pads
>straws
>>
Nail clippers, empty jar, random porn dvd
>>
>>767538706
Does Walmart sell porn? Serious question.
>>
>>767538735
I don’t know. Bandaids otherwise.
>>
3x 200ct boxes of imodium.
>>
>>767538735

Of course not dummy, they dont even carry certain books/cds they find too offensive.
>>
>>767538862
k. lol I dunno, that's why I asked. Not all of us have Walmarts or your 'version' of Walmarts in our countries niggah. I know they sell guns in some so, why not porn?
>>
>>767538706
>>
>>767538925

Eh, walmart has strange conservative christian undertones.
>>
>>767539099
Gotcha... weird cause I always thought it felt like that too. Maybe just the color schemes from the ones I've seen.
>lotsa white and pale blue

good sales strategy I guess.
>>
>>767539168

Yeah lot more camo than you'd see at a target. Kinda ironic that they try to be blue collar while they muscle out local businesses to sell a bunch of chinese shit.
>>
>>767533219
Oreos, Cheetos & Cheerios.
>>
>>767533219
Pregnancy test, painkillers, coat hanger
>>
>Birthday cake "Happy Birthday Grandma"
>Box of Rat Poison
>Hallmark "Sorry for your loss" Card
>>
>>767533219
a phone card that they have to load up so you can chat with your 18 children in mexico
a pack of cigs that they don't have... just have them keep searching
dry ice
>>
>>767539687
winner. maximum kek
>>
>>767534633
nice
>>
>>767534886
you dont get out a lot do you..
>>
>>767535049
they got wallmarkts in irak to?
>>
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>>767533219
1. take a full log of bologna, unwrap the tip, hold it with both hands, keep on nibbling on it like a hamster, including the "dont take this from me" look, while walking through the ailes to get the other 2 items

2. a gynormous bag of cotton balls OR like 10 big bags of them. tuck them under your arms while nibbling on the bologna.

3. a single blueberry. put it in a plastic bag,
and tie it with a perfect ribbon

4. ??????

5. profit! (and a confused cashier)
>>
Whipped Cream, Brats, Veggie Burgers
>>
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>>767540302
>3 items
>10 big bags of cotton balls
>>
>>767540475
that's just in case there is no gynormous single pack.
>>
A DVD copy of MVP: most valued primate, cotton buds, and a baby stroller
>>
Actualy i would buy a hook for my ceiling. Like a real good one. Then i'll ask which is the best rope and which itches less.
Then i will buy a chair and go home
>>
Lube, Rope, Bag of Fruit
>>
>>767533219
Pack of condoms
The largest cucumber
Chilli sauce
>>
>>767533219
Extra strong black Trash bags, the largest roll of cling film and a butchers knife
>>
watermelon half
watermelon half
stapler
>>
>>767542457
that one got me. good job.
>>
>>767534667
They're not smart enough for that they'll just think you're cleaning your bathroom or some shit
>>
>>767533219
Tube of KY jelly, the biggest cucumber I could find, and a 3 pack of 5 year old's panties.
>>
Pizza
Pepperoni
Pineapple
>>
>>767542644
Disgusting
>>
2 big bottles of liquor and a jar of baby food. Paying cash with not enough to cover all three items. When the cashier tells me this I say I guess I don't want the baby food then.
>>
>>767533219
Lube, hunting rifle and a juicer.
>>
Banana
Vaseline
Minions on DVD
>>
>>767542685
>not saying "I guess I already have enough baby food" and leaving with just the 2 bottles
>>
>>767542979
Better way of saying it but yeah you're leaving without the baby food
>>
>>767533219
done both of these as a teen
[spoiler]it wasn't even remotely funny[/spoiler]
>lube
>trash bag
>coat hanger
or
>Eye liner
>angsty teen mag
>razor blades
>>
Caffeinated painkillers, Red Bull and cognac
>>
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>>767543297
>but you're not leaving without the baby food
>you have 2 bottles of baby food
>>
Canned pineapple
Canned (or bagged? Precooked, whatever) Asparagus
Cooked pizza

I would go to the food court and top all the pizza with those two things
>>
Nesquik milk enema kit
>>
>Watermelon cut in half
>Super glue or duct tape
>>
>>767534614
HAH WE BOUGHT SOME CONDOMS LOLOLOLOL

fucking idiot 12 year olds
>>
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>>767544078
>joins thread
>doesn't understand thread
>hates thread
>2018
>being this new

(You)
>>
>beer
>skittles
>funnel
>>
>>767533219
a home tool set, benedryl and a cheesecake.
>>
>powdered instant coffee
>straws
>razor blades
>>
>>767534444
Wasted quads
>>
>>767533219
>knife
>rope
>duct tape
>>
A Bible
Condoms
And Dog Treats
>>
Duct tape
Duck
>>
>>767533219
butt plug
super glue
laxatives
>>
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>>767533219
Whiskey, Beer, Vodka and Diapers (or baby food)

When I get to the cashier, I act like I don't have enough money, and put the diapers or baby food back.

Not sure which item is worse.
>>
>>767534633
The first time ive laughed at something on /b/ in a year
>>
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bowl, nails, spoon
>>
> 10L water bottle
> 1L Rubbing alcohol bottle
> Kool Aid sachet
>>
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>>767534444
Faggot quads Kys.
>>
>>767533371
>Worked there 8 years
So, you're a fucking loser
>>
>>767534633
Kek, May not be original but a fucking classic
>>
> Rope
> Squirrel
> Megaphone
>>
>>767533219
bought beer and baby oil once. The cashier kept giving my shit. Honestly it was pretty unprofessional.
>>
>>767533219
Shovel, tarp, and rope.
>>
Stroller, Transformer, cake
>>
>>767533219
Condoms, female contraceptive, coat hangers
>>
>>767544791
A cross
Lube
A bible
>>
>>767533219
Apples, Razor Blades, and Halloween gift bags.
Thread replies: 115
Thread images: 17


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