Junkies, please help me. I need your knowledge.
My father is an alcoholic. He recently went to rehab, and I visited him there last month. While there, I spied a wonderful specimen- tall, thin, kind eyes, laughing & beautiful. After I left, much to my surprise, my pops told me that she had asked him for my number. Being the weak, fleshly sensualist that I am, I told him to relay the digits, for which he rightly questioned my judgement (she's a heroin addict, been to jail, this was her sixth rehab). Pops was nonetheless a total bro and gave her my number. We get in touch- she was out in a few days. All goes well and we start seeing each other. I'm 26, she's only 19..
Now I'm no square. Done alot of different shit, recovering reefer addict(laugh it up), never done smack, but I've done plenty of amphetamines and smoked crystal thrice. Felt how bad that shit was, how hard on the heart (I am older now and pride myself on healthy living.) As far as drug use, this girl puts me to shame. She began using crystal at the tender age of 13 to lose weight, discovered heroin not long after. Now she's actually a fucking fashion model, and still hates her body, go figure. Anyway after getting out this time she's on vivitrol- a weekly (or biweekly?) injection that blocks the effects of opioids. However, as I quickly discovered, she still smokes small quantities of meth.
I didn't know how to approach it. To me being supportive was remaining non-judgmental, encouraging of honesty, always suggesting less harmful alternatives, trying to walk gently towards giving it up. Went to some NA meetings with her, proposed fun ways to get her out and exercising (ie:hikes, tennis, etc.) tried to school her on the rewiring of mesolimbic pathways and the myriad negative health effects while simultaneously being hopeful and upbeat- there's still time to change the road you're on, yada yada, the wonders of neuroplasticity via exercise and clean livin'..
Aah I can see how naive I sound, reading this. Sorry to ramble- As of last night, she went incommunicado. No response, nothing. I texted her dad, who says she's holed up in her room, not a peep, communicating with no one. Apparently she stayed with her mom last night, who is a bipolar schizophrenic type and seemingly a destructive influence..
Does anyone know what the right move is here? Yea I could just forget about it, move back to LA, it was just a fling.. but that's too easy. I'm not taking this personally, her reflexive lying, the self-absorption.. she is an addict. But really, objectively, what is the best thing I can do for this poor soul? What does she need? Should I tell her dad about her meth use? Tell him that she hides it in her socks? I risk being less able to help her if I narc like that. What then? Corner her dealer, put a gun to his head? Surveil him, gather enough dirt, give some detective a freebie? She'll just find that shit somewhere else of course (fun to think about though).
So you tell me guys. Is the only thing I can really do just stand back, offer love and support if she wants it?
Thank you so much for reading and weighing in, I appreciate it.
>>767450139
you cant save people who don't want to be saved.
Don't ask for advice on 4chan.
Don't ask for it on /b/ of all places.
>>767450124
Sounds like you love her or some shit otherwise you'd just give her a few days and wait for her to come back for sex
>>767450124
I would not get attached to anyone like that. Her youth will run out quickly and then what will she be left with?
WTF MODS
>>767451141
It's a fuckin midget you dip
I’m so glad I didn’t get involved with anyone that did hard drugs. Had an old girlfriend that liked coke and I didn’t agree with it we ended up breaking up but not because of that. There are weak folk out there that go down the slippedly slope of drugs. Best to stay away if possible. You can’t help someone who can’t admit they have a problem and who doesn’t want to help themselves.
you do sound like an asshole dude, dont make it your problem, or pretend like it is. you cannot save her. no one gets clean unless they decide to on their own, internally, usually after hitting bottom.... a fuckton. as described, she has a long road still. if you want to ride on her rollercoaster a while, set clear boundries on both sides. in writing. the second they get crossed, eject, for the sake of both. and stay out of her drug use completely.
though, for real. from the way that all sounds, and ive seen it a lot, your both gonna have a long road. you already sound codependent (guess it makes sense w/ ur dad) theres something you can do.... educate yourself, you need it.
>>767450124
>To me being supportive was remaining non-judgmental
WRONG
That's the wrong way to deal with females. This girl is going to wrap you around her finger, wait till she wants something to chew on for a while instead of grinding her teeth when shes not on a meth binge or sucking off a meth dealer and a couple of friends for a hit, then she's going to spit you out after she chewed you up. Holy fuck you're pathetic dealing with this girl. I get it, why you would. That's why I know it's pathetic. Seriously just get rid of her or shut the fuck up about your problems because you're going to have nothing but problems with her.
>>767450124
>>767450139
Since you just started seeing her you have to take a gamble here. Is she "realistically" worth it to you then you should carefully get her away from the means to acquire drugs. Show her a better existence. Otherwise you can take a lucky shot at just demanding/forcing her habits to change...which isn't a clever idea in a fresh relationship.
On a totally unrelated note...how do you even come up with the idea to help her when you can' even help your own dad?
You're looking at her like a fixer upper project.
You simply CANNOT fix her period.
You asked what she needs?
She's an addict. She needs to get high. Nothing more.
Been there done that. "Dated" an addict for close to 3 years.
I didn't figure things out until close to 2 years into things. This chick kept her shit hidden well and was never too fucked up to function.
Spent the next year attempting to fix the problem.
You're going to put yourself through so much worthless bullshit it isn't even funny.
Drop her period.
>>767451933
>>767451637
dont run away op, you opened the can of worms, finish it. i was a junky for 18 years before cleaning up. i can disabuse you of your silly ideas like telling on her or dealer nonsense, but im gonna fuck off soon if you dont come back and explain the reasons you are gonna ignore all of us.
really, learn all you can about codependence, substance abuse, iop, rp, disease model, Not disease model. everything you can. even if you do wise up and move on, you could help your dad.... or atleast avoid enabling him.
>>767450124
Even if you are trying to fix her. I don't think you are the man. She picked you, as she can sense you are a junky piece of shit too... and she can share her crap with.
She wouldn't go after a some nuclear rearctor designer that wanks over pictures of the queen on stamps, which is probably what she needs. Someone normal.
You are similar to her, and not strong enough to help her.... so don't. Fuck it and dump it.
>>767450124
Recovery rates for addiction are low. At a given time it's something like 5%. That doesn't mean she's necessarily doomed, it just means she's probably going to relapse this time. There's always next time if she survives. Anyway, if she's in active addiction, stay clear. She's toxic right now. If she seeks recovery again, swoop right in and be the good guy.
>>767450139
nigger half of students to meth every day
Bro she has to want to quit on her own. I'm 78 days clean from Fentanyl today only because of myself. No one else could have stopped me from using. That's what you need to understand. To be honest I think you should just leave because she needs to re-evaluate her life and decide which is the better option; stay high while your entire life crashes down around you or get clean and start experiencing everything you were missing out on.
>>767450124
Leave that suka.
Or you would be the one would suffer at the end of the day.
>>767450124
Get away from her OP, women think they can fix men all the time and always get broken because if someone deep down doesn't want to change they wont. My best friend from high school started smoking pot when he was 14 and always tried to get me involved but my brother always lectured me about drugs (hes fiends also went down in flames) anyway when my friend was 17 started shutting me out i was concerned so i asked his girlfriend what is wrong, she said that he had been using meth and stealing from her. Eventually he went to rehab and got back into school but when we all graduated he hit the pipe hard and never looked back, he stole 2 of my guns and my granddads safe because he had been in my shed before and knew how to get in and what to take. Hes now in jail for armed robbery. They don't get better.
OP here,
Wondered if you guys would be interested in this where I copypasta'd it from https://7chan.org/rx/res/13240.html
lolrofl I hope this becomes a meme
fyi I shoot meth occasionally
>>767450124
Stay away
>>767450124
been there, done that.
you either accept the meth as part of your live together, or you run to the hills. There's no change gonna happen if not from within herself. This may happen, but it also may not. nobody knows.
Sounds like a total nutcase anon, but all females are like that, besides she's just a lil girl, wich is totallly fine, so i'd recommend banging the hell out of her for a few months and then run away like a deer
