My first attempt at pizza, how did i do /b/?
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Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
My first attempt at pizza, how did i do /b/?
>>767365769
go throw yourself into the oven
>>767365769
I don't even know how you could be this bad at making pizza.
>>767365769
how could you possibly have fucked this up so badly?
It tastes a bit burnt but it seems ok
bro you forgot the cheese
>>767365953
Looks good, I'd love to try it
>>767366018
Its in there....somewhere
>>767365769
that's actually not that bad OP. amerifats don't understand that pizza doesn't need to be 100% see through from the grease with cheese
>>767366084
also where is the sausage?
>>767365769
I´ve seen worse.
>>767365769
>>767366135
Didnt have sausages, used some meat i found in the fridge
>>767366204
I have pizza rolls, it's 8:15am. in Canada, should I make some for breakfast or wait?
>>767366241
doit
>>767365769
Looks like wrecked anus
>>767365769
not bad, but needs better distribution of ingredients and could use some more stuff put on there.
>>767365769
By the look of it, you used tomato paste as your sauce.
Half looks burnt, the other looks like dough. you have a mini pinch of some dried herb or another. I'm guessing oregano.
If I were served this by my woman, I would break up with her.
>>767366372
have you ever had chicken, broccoli and feta cheese on an alfredo base?
>>767365769
>>767366372
Thanks!
>>767366407
hay spidey
>>767365769
It has turned out just like everything on your life, a total failure.
>>767366397
can't say that I have
>>767366601
promise me you'll try it. it's really, really fucking good. the alfredo mixture with the feta is really rich. providing the broccoli isn't overcooked, it adds a great crunch
>>767365769
holy shit dude, don't ever do culinary stuff ever again
>>767366638
aight. The broccoli sounds a bit weird to me but I'll give it a try, Anon.
>>767365769
The main issue regards the leavening aka, try to let it leven until it becomes elastic and stringy, then make it into a ball amd press it gently into a disk. Less sauce next time, priorities are:
-sauce
-4 mozzarella slices
-oil in a rough 6 shape
-oven at max temp for 15'
>Keep it up. Practice makes us perfect.
>>767366722
if I run into you later tonight and you're in north america I'll buy you one when I order my dinner later~
>>767365769
I thought it was a picture of a shotgun blast to the face
>>767365769
Finished eating it, it tasted better than it looked!
Thanks for all of the positive replys, i think my next time will be way better!
Thanks for the negative comments too, i’ve had a great laugh!
> Overcooked. Gotta take it out before the bread gets crispy. It is still warm when removed from the oven, so it keeps cooking for a minute or so.
> Nice round shape
> Why is the entire topping red? Is that sauce? Too much sauce. Put the sauce on the bottom.
> Not enough cheese. Put the cheese directly on the sauce.
> Try adding some actual topping on the top next time.
> Bonus points for adding what looks like pizza-related herbs/spices
2/10 result, 5/10 effort
>>767367203
2/10
u tried op
>>767367203
>>767367267
2/10 is more than i was expecting lol
>>767367326
i hope it was only /b/ who seen ur "pizza"
>>767367203
people in chicago do this unironically
>>767367583
not today FBI this is a wholesome cooking thread. try
>>>/ck/
guys rate my taco
>>767367583
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL09go9ZyhT_67bnZI--PNrWGfqvVJ1sCh
>>767367971
looks tasty is that a floppy disk?
>>767367971
Nice! Must be delicious :D
>>767368026
lmao ya. i got like 2.8 mbs of porn on this badboy haha
>>767368069
thaanks
>>767367971
that's a burrito anon
>>767368253
Retro porn dump thread? retro porn dump thread.
>>767368253
furry porn?
>>767368356
oh okay, im foreign, sorry.
rate my burrito then?
>>767368253
Ya got nothing on me!
>>767368410
i have not seen those things since primary school
>>767368395
1 burrito/taco
>>767368379
nah it's like retro shit, furry porn wasn't so popular in the 2000s.
>>767368410
ya can't beat my retro
>>767365769
Great work for your first pizza friend! My first pizza looked like a menstural disaster!
Try leaving the dough covered in a warm place for 12-24 hours, makes a world of a difference. Also use real yeast, not that active dry shit. And remember, if you can't hand throw it, there is no shame in using a rolling pin. Good luck mate!
>>767368668
Challenge accepted
>>767368589
that's a fair rating. thank u sir.
>>767365769
Also, if you can't afford to make a sauce, get mild ketchup, mix it up with some paprika, garlic, oregano, salt and a tad bit of sugar.
>>767368818
Thank You :D
>>767365769
how drunk are you ?
>>767367971
Would tongue/10
>>767368971
1%
>>767366725
>15'
that means feet.
>>767368903
Here's one of my first tries. The dough looks gorgeous on this one. Tastes great! Also remember, less is more. Overfilling your pizza makes you look like a damn american mong, and prevents it from being cooked properly. Best of luck friend!
>>767368856
okay you win
nice setup
>>767368525
>Primary school
Are you a faggot? You mean elementary.
>>767369055
Nice get, also, holy shit that looks fucking amazing!
any of you guys want your own .me domain?
I bought an edu email so I could get free digital ocean and AWS credit and free amazon prime and I guess it comes with a free domain registration
>>767369120
That soviet amp is gonna last forever :D
>>767369046
two soon
>>767369219
Thank you mate! It's really simple, honestly. I enjoy cooking, and work perfects.
>>767368818
A rolling pin will push out all the air. Use your hands to form it.
>>767366204
Oh, so it's a scrap pizza. I had these. Still, they didn't look like I reguritated all the ingridients before that.
>>767369152
it's a British thing
>>767365769
Looks tastey the more you make it the more you will perfect the art of how you make it have fun bro lol any one that's hateing out thare is just jelly .
>>767365769
That's not child porn.you faggot
>>767369507
It will. But throwing the dough can be very intimidating for begginers. Best to stretch it by hand, and fix minor things with a pin.
>>767367971
Learn how to wrap your meat...
Uh, I mean wrap it properly so it doesn't spill all over your crotch.
This was one of mine first pizzas
R8
>>767365769
what is the topping, vomit?
>>767369734
And this
>>767365769
Where tf is the cheese m8
>>767369793
Under meat
>>767365769
It looks like a gaping fleshwound
>>767369734
Looks to greasy mate, but that's most likely due to the low quality meat on top. If you can't afford good meat, toss it on the pan for a short while to dry it out, and then bake it. Best not to dry it too much, or if you do, cheese on top! Crust looks delicious tho.
>>767369791
Looks a bit greasy there mate, and the sauce looks a bit runny. Thicken up the sauce a bit and maybe opt for a different type of cheese? Edamer works all right and is fairly cheap. Crust does not look half bad.
>>767369734
next time turn your pizza on broil for 5 mins to crisp your bacon desu
>>767365769
it looks like that pic, can't remember what it was from, like a flat face that was just run over by a car, anyone know what I'm on about? someone photoshop that shit on that pizza if you do
>>767366089
And there it is, triggered foreigners >>767369055
>>767370329
>Foreigners
You're a foreigner in your own country. mutt.
>>767368901
>adding sugar to prepared ketchup.
Um, no.
>>767365769
Doing a pizza is easy it's just tomato sauce mozzarella olive oil basil and oregano
>>767371056
Basically yes.
>>767366378
Accurate. I make homemade pizzas often and can confirm this pizza looks like a puddle of bloody diarrhea
>>767365769
youre a fucking retard.
How dare you even show your work when its this fucking bad?
>>767367704
Ahh, not so fast Morty. You heard your mom, we’ve got adventures to go on Morty. Just you and me, and sometimes your sister, and sometimes your mom, but NEVER your dad! You wanna know why Morty? Because he CROSSED me. OK, take it easy, Rick! Th-that's dark. Oh it gets darker Morty... Welcome to the darkest year of our adventures. First thing that’s different, no more dad Morty. He threatened to turn me in to the government, so I made him and the government go away... Ohhh fuck... I repla-burp-ced them both as the defacto-patriarch of your family, AND your universe. Oh man... Your mom wouldn’t have accepted me if I came home without you and your sister. So now you know the REAL reason I rescued you. Ohhhh-woah... I JUST TOOK OVER THE FAMILY MORTY! Oh man. And if you tell your mom or sister I said any of this, I’ll DENY it. You'll deny it... And they’ll take my side, because I’m a hero, Morty. And now you’re gonna have to do whatever I say, Morty, FOREVER! A-and I-I’ll go out and find some more of that Mulan, Szechuan Teriyaki Deep Dish Pizzer, Morty. Wh-what are you talking about? Because that’s, that's what this is all about Morty! Szechuan? Th-that’s my one arm man. I’m not driven by avenging my dead family Morty crawls away- Morty, that was FAKE! -and Morty gets pulled back. I-I’m driven by finding that, Deep Dish Pizzer. Pizzer? I want that Mulan Deep Dish Pizzer, Morty. Mulan? That’s my series arc Morty! What the Hell? If it takes 9 seasons, I WANT MY Deep Dish Pizzer, What're you talking about Rick? SZECHUAN Deep Dish Pizzer MORTY! What're you talking about? TH-THAT’S WHAT'S GONNA TAKE US, ALL THE WAY TO THE END MORTY! SEASON, 9 MORE SEASONS MORTY! Szechuan Deep Dish Pizzer?! 9 MORE SEASONS UNTIL I GET THAT SZECHUAN Deep Dish Pizzer What is that?! FOR 97 MORE YEARS MORTY! What are you talking about?! I WANT THAT Deep Dish Pizzer MORTY!!!
>>767367203
I'd like to express a profound appreciation for this supremely constructive criticism
>>767365769
OP's image looks like a scab I pulled off my back, three weeks after I fell off an E7 6d climb that I foolishly attempted to solo on sight.
