Can i get a feels thread please? Everything is so fucked that i can't think of anything except being numb..and even that's difficult
Fucked how?
>>752478260
Before this thread gets rolling, I just want to encourage everyone here to find a therapist immediately. I was sexually and emotionally abused as a kid, which I've kept a secret for over a decade. It's affected me tremendously, and I only now just contacted a therapist.
The relief you feel in simply knowing you are heard and cared about is tremendous. You have no clue how voraciously your inner child is seeking that.
Spent 11 months in rehab. Got out. Family took me in. Living in the past. Friend od'd. Other best friend flips his car on the highway. I relapse. Family kicks me out. Old high school friend takes me in. Her and everyone at my job give me rides everyday. 20 bucks here and there cause my fuckin pay card is taking weeks to get. Haven't been able to pay my friend anything yet. Feel like a fuckin charity case. Fucking head hurts from depression and over thinking. Can't sleep. Quit my meds. Fuck it. Most my days i just think about nothing. Fucking blank.
>>752478685
And now i just feel horrible. Your past alone is so tragic that mine is basically glitter and rainbows. But it still fuckin hurts
>>752479202
We're not competing. Get help, you need it. You don't want to hit your mental breaking point like I did before you realize you need to get your ass moving.
I mean how can i justify how low i am..how numb i am when there's so much more suffering out there?
I have serious problems trusting women, help me /b/ please. I trusted one girl when i was younger and she shat all over me to try to get with a chad, i didn't even try to get with her it was platonic but she is the girl i trusted the most in my life, and she always assured me of how much i meant to her and that she was worthy of that trust.
If she was willing to break my trust, what girl wouldn't? How am i ever supposed to leave loneliness and find someone to spend my life with if i can't trust her?
>>752479581
You gotta wait buddy. I have serious trust issues. May not be what you want to hear but get put from where you are now. Move states, make a new start and until then, bide with time. Take care anon.
>>752479105
It doesn't matter how long you freeload as long as you're polite and repay kindness with kindness.
If you need help sleeping, I suggest lifting in the afternoon. It somewhat helps me to take things off my mind and helps tire myself out.
>>752480800
Thanks, anon.
>>752478685
ive been to five and here i am getting drunk for probably the 34th night in a row
so many newfags cant spot obvious bait
Whats her name anons?
Hair color?
What did you like about her?
How did you lose her?
>>752484020
Don't say her name, it only makes it worse to forget. It only gives it more power.
>>752484195
It gives it even more power if you don't say her name and you try to repress. Like how we commonly use the word Nigger. It's lost it's edge to us but it hasn't to others. Say her name more so it becomes less edgy. Mine was Emily, fucking cunt left me high and dry out of the blue. Hurts to think about that when it happened but easier as time goes on.
>>752484020
Iris
Black
loved me for my faults. Was basically the same person as me just better, smarter, more loving
She got depressed and wanted to pay attention to school cause she was failing. I let her and she eventually lost feeling for me in the process.
>>752484497
How long ago was that?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FJJ8hWDXWGs
>>752484587
a 2 weeks ago. Still not okay. I try to talk to her still but she ignores me and it just makes me feel worse cause it wasn't my fault and theres nothing I can do. I still love her and genuinely care about her and ask her hows she doing but she never lets me back into her life to help. I feel like I should stop texting her all together cause I just feel so weird about it
>>752484020
>doesnt matter
>red, fire crotch
>not much. i built up fake expectations before meeting her irl
>i tried harder than she did despite her saying she wanted more. i told her how i felt, she ghosted me
i dont really give a fuck but it still bothers me
>>752484895
meant this sad boy gif but who cares lol
>>752484895
probably the smarter idea to back up. Work on yourself. Girls will hate it if you're begging to be in their life. If you lose her you lose her find another girl. It sucks and it's hard to understand it during the process but it's whats needed. Good luck man, I'll try and catch these threads as often as i can at these times.
>>752478260
Judging by the opoid crisis along with every other fucking person being addicted to drugs alcohol or something else. I'd say that makes you normal.
>>752484930
Redheads are my weakness. I remember I got dumped by my redhead GF. She just wanted to recontrol her life and wanted people not to pressure her. I felt really guilty as if thats her way of saying i pressured her into sex. which we never fucked but i'd eat her out any chance i got. Went on a binge and started to talk to this other hot redhead few grades below me. I think I came on too strong. Another redhead again came on too strong. Then i realized i was a douchebag
>>752484221
So u wanted to fuck the dog?
>>752485059
>>752485320
He was the goodest boy I never got to pet.
>>752484020
Lilian.
Blonde.
She had empathy and compassion; she was gentle, with a warm heart. Traits I still look for in the women I meet now. Some women have them, but they never come to the surface the way they did with Lilian.
We drove each other away with distance and the immaturity of youth. We'd grown up together and then moved far apart; I had the opportunity to uproot my life and start it over closer to her, an opportunity that I did not take. In looking back, that was a huge mistake; a decade later, I still regret that mistake.
>>752485063
She's depressed and has attempted suicide before I just don't want her to feel like she is alone and that I still care about her no matter what. I'm thinking she still loves me in a way but shes's just pushing me away in retaliation. As she was breaking up with me she was literally telling me how I'm the perfect guy in the world and i'm the boyfriend she'd always wanted when she was younger. I just don't think I can happy without her. but hey maybe ill get a second chance
>>752484517
His Grandpa is a pussy
>>752485410
Might've been for the best. What if you had a falling out later and you would've been far from home. Call me a pussy but I'm certain I will die in my city. How long ago was that my guy?
just try to write music or something
>>752485460
Keep tabs on her. She might need distance but just be mature enough to have your door open even if it's plutonic, some people might say thats a cuck approach, it might be but at least you'll build yourself up and also help her if she needs it.
>>752485586
Shut up faggot I hope you get zika when your wife gets pregnant
>>752484736
Damn that's heartwarming.
>>752485874
brb lemme crush that warmth
I feel a lot better now that I've been bitch free for a while. I'm thinking they're just not for me. Every time they just drive me to the edge of checking myself into the funny farm.
>>752485751
I just feel like I can't now lol. For the past two weeks I wake up text her good morning, she for the most part responds to that. Text at like 4 asking her how her day was. Memes on twitter that i know she'd like, and a goodnight text, which she usually responds too. I just don't know if she thinks its annoying or not. We left on good terms honestly. she kind of slowly broke my heart over a course of a week till i realized she wanted out. Sure it hurt but I like to laugh through pain Its kind of a mechanism for me. So I cracked some jokes she laughed. I asked her if it was okay if I still occasionally texted her and she said yeah but still think im over doing it for having my heartbroken. Guess im just obssesive
>>752486101
No you're right she's sending lots of mixed messages. Just tone down the texts. Personally to me that's a lot of texting. Just slowly phase out some of those texts to maybe 1 a day or maybe 1 every other day.
>>752484020
His name is James.
He has receding black hair & a gorgeous black beard with a white streak.
I love everything about him. Including his bipolar disorder.
I've lost him to severe bipolar depression. & I don't know if I'll ever get him back.
He won't talk to me. Or see me. It hurts like nothing has ever hurt.
For those of you here with depression. I'm so sorry. I don't have it, but I know what it's like now. I wish I could take it away from him & all of you.
>>752484020
Ann
Black
She was the sweetest girl ive ever been with. Truly generous and caring.
I broke up with her. Convinced myself i didnt love her enough. I think i was wrong but it doesnt matter anyways. She wants to live where she is and i definitely dont, so it probably wouldnt have worked anyways. Still miss her so fucking much though, and i feel terrible for hurting her.
>>752485292
the sex was terrible tbh.
she could deepthroat which was cool, but she talked more game than she acted on. she'd always talk about how horny she was and how much she wanted sex but half the time i initiated it she rejected it without saying it. "oh i have to pee, i have to walk my dog..."
she had a nice ass and she was pretty qt but that's all. never really felt anything for her and should be easy to get over since she lives over 10k km away
>>752479529
This is probably the most mature thing ever said on b
>>752478685
You deserved to be sexually abused.
>>752478685
I feel you. I was molested when I was a kid, took me a long time to come to grips with it. Going to a therapist helped me tremendously.
>>752479581
Block her. Remove her from your life entirely. If she doesn't want you, there's nothing you can do to change that. It fucking sucks, I know. But it's what you have to do. Don't torture yourself with the what-ifs. Just remember that there are many, many women that will make you feel the way she made you feel.
>>752484020
Chelsey.
Red.
I liked how she made me feel alive. I felt as if I knew her my whole life. She made me feel like a completed man.
She had a boyfriend. Her boyfriend is small, feminine and gay as all hell. They've been together for a long time and couldn't imagine life without him (they were very codependent). She doesn't even have sex with him. She was using me for masculine attention, she was never going to leave him. Made me feel like a real idiot. I miss her every day. Blocked her on everything and I don't ever expect to talk to her again.
>>752485596
We spent a lot of time together as kids and were together as a couple (on and off) from 15 to 23. We were 25 when we had the, "We both need to move on" talk; I'm 34 now. We still text and talk now and then, we were best friends for far too long to just NOT have each other around in some small way. She'll usually call me on my birthday and I'll call her on her's, we'll chat for a few minutes and that's it. Its still tough though.
My family was rough. We lived on a farm and my father was obsessed with work. He was angry, as well; I'd try to gauge how angry he was by the sound of the door closing behind him. If the slamming wasn't that bad, I'd stay in my room and play video games. If it was really loud, I'd hop out the window and go ride my bike or something. My mom was just distant and cold, probably from having to deal with his shit for so long. I never had a home while I was living with them; just a place to come back to at the end of the day.
Around Lilian, things were different. She was quiet and peaceful, she made me feel like the rest of the world had melted and wherever we were, we were safe. I think that if I'd moved to her and we'd split, I still would have been close to home.
>>752486101
Wish I had a voicemail from her but I don't think I ever missed a call from her.I miss her voice so much. At least I have the videos of her playing piano for me. She was sweet like that and would practice in front of me all the time
>>752486402
My brother suffers from bipolar and suffers with drug addiction. He's moving into that NEET life. I hate to see the guy i use to look up to turn into that. I want to help him but he's too far into the rabbit hole. I really feel for you. if you stick in there for James, he really deserves you and you deserve the better of him. I can't even hang in there for my own blood.
I didn't think I could be so monumentally heartbroken as I was.
Being alone is fine, I'm used to that.
In fact it's kind of preferred.
But losing someone that was willing to look past all my bullshit and pull me out of it, so that I could be someone great?
A father, no less.
You don't really recover from that, not completely at least.
Everything fuses back together wrong, and nothing makes much sense afterwards.
>>752486476
Girls move on from heart break faster because they mourn first then party while we party, then mourn. Did she leave country or did she move to a different city? Maybe if you ever can you can reconnect, time heals all wounds my guy
>>752486484
I'm assuming you were in high school, my current gf doesn't do much either, she doens't give good head, and she'll say she cant fit my dick in her mouth. I'm not that big tbh it's sort of sad. Sometimes i'd risk dating a whore who knows how to do it.
I also love how redheads taste. Mine at least tasted like strawberries.
>>752484888
The mark of a mature man is knowing that this retarded and believing in "true love" or a "perfect woman" is for naive children. Grow up, faggot.
>be 15, at a low point
>no friends, bad relationship with family
>alone as fuck
>new year, new classmates
>this girl won't stop talking to me
>we become friends
>ffw a few months
>she puts on a wide smile and runs to hug me every time she sees me
>whenever i make her laugh i feel like i just won the lottery
>she starts fooling around with a common friend of ours
>feel happy for them
until
>one day at her house, a bunch of us got together
>her and our friend dissapear for a while
>went to check out something she had painted
>other friend says jokingly "i think they're focusing on the painter more than the painting"
>heart sinks
>realize i love this girl
>realize i wasted my chance
>i'm moving again soon, so i had to act now or never
>talk to her, tell her how i feel
>"I would love to go on a date with you, anon, but i wanna know where things with [common friend] end up"
>pretend it's ok, but i let her know i think it's for the best that we don't see each other for a while
>ffw 10 years
>I've never spoken to her again
>look her up on social media
>she has a new bf
>look at her profile pic
>she's got on that huge smile she used to put on for me.
It still hurts.
>>752486563
Nigga cuck the shit out of that guy. Also redheads are my weakness as discussed here
>>752485292
>>752487033
>for naive children.
I adopted that perspective once. It was nice, though double-edged.
I was proven wrong, horribly.
Then again, maturity is very overrated, if not arbitrarily defined.
>>752486994
I'm going to sound like a cuck but as long as she enjoys the sex who cares. When you both grow old and slowly stop all you'll have is the emotions and love you have for each other. you have to move past your lustful desires to see true love
>>752486563
>Block her.
We haven't spoken to each other in a very long time. I don't want her even if i do dwell in what-ifs from time to time.
But she was the most trust-worthy woman i ever found, and i shouldn't have trusted her. What am i to make of it anon? Who am i to trust?
>>752486994
nope. mid 20s, she was the 4th girl i wouldve considered something serious with (3 srs relationships prior)
first redhead though. id been striking out on brunettes and only hooked up with one blonde so maybe the contributed to my hopes of it being better.
on the bright side I just got a 70k/yr job with minimal experience so as soon as i start i know i wont give a fuck about this whole ordeal
>>752487091
If you really loved her, you'll find solace in that she's happy.
>>752484020
How can a man lose someone he never had to begin with?
>>752487199
thats why you never say that shes perfect. Just that she's perfect for you, and that everyone has their faults but you still love her with them
>>752487187
Man, I know, redheads are amazing. Most of them have freckles which is a huge plus.
>>752487033
Awww look at this edgy kid guys! He thinks he's a badass because he calls people a faggot on the internet. I hope you fall hard for a skank and she leaves you for jamal. I hope you have beautiful children that get cancer.
>>752487332
I do, somewhat. What really stings is not finding a smile like hers ever again. I've had a couple of girlfriends since, and dated a few more, but i've never felt what i felt for her again. I wonder if she's the only one i will ever love like that.
What hurts is my mistake.
Last time i felt something in 5th grade
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UYq3W6IjASQ >thread theme
>>752487262
Make a life where trust in others isn't necessary. People will fail you. Take charge and don't depend on other people for validation. You have it within yourself.
>>752486808
I cant relate, i never partied.
>>752486671
Thank you, so much for what you said. & saying his name. I would lay down my life for him. I would steal the depression & l be sunk in it instead, with or without him, so he could be happy & well again.
I didn't know the true nature of bipolar or depression before it overtook him. These are real fucking horrific, life-destroying things. I wouldn't wish it upon anyone ever.
I will stick in there, I will. No matter what. But. Why can't you hang in there for your brother..? Not challenging or scolding. Asking. Curious.
>>752486656
Shit dude, but you lived at least. i assume you have a family of your own now. If not and Lillian is the same way maybe it's time to consider getting it back, but thats adorable shame it fell through
>>752487353
Once upon a time, yeah.
>>752487581
Same sad from the start and I wouldn't say party more like addiction to cope with feeling
I end in prison.
He in a coffin.
You free to live and find love again.
You're welcome.
>>752484020
That image alone is making me close down my desktop goodnight /b/
>tfw doing the Captcha in tears
>>752486484
>>752486994
>>752487290
pic related since everyone has a hard on for red heads now
>>752484020
>Alexandra
>Brown, with a bit of blonde due to being always in the sun
>Everything but the top is her emerald green eyes, most beautiful eyes ive ever seen, and that laugh
>Distance, I move back soon though so maybe there is a chance.
I hope there is
>>752487509
Khai Dreams some underrated shit
>>752487201
Yea she does, and recently I feel like my sex drive has been going down. We can hang out all day and not even touch each other sexually but we still care for each other
>>752484020
>Whats her name anons?
Anita.
>Hair color?
Dark brown but she had these beautiful green eyes and freckles on her nose.
>What did you like about her?
She was easy to talk to, she was the first person in my life where I felt like I could finally talk about our feelings. She was down to earth, we didn't need fancy dinners or anything.
Just cuddling by the bedside and we could just sit and talk on a bench by the lake about our lives.
>How did you lose her?
A couple of days after my birthday she told she didn't love me anymore, that was 6 months ago. Now I've been stuck seeing her everyday in college until next year. And I'm pretty sure I overheard her wanting to try out Tinder or Bumble.
I feel like I'm stuck in hell in perpetual fucking nonstop pain.
>>752484020
Emily
Red
Got her pregnant and she had a miscarriage and we both took it hard but I closed up instead of being there for her and some other shit from my past bit me on the ads and she eventually had enough. My one biggest regret.
>>752486402
>>752486671
My dad's bipolar, he's only been medicated for the last ~10 years. It was hard growing up with him and it's sure as hell an up-hill fight to keep him medicated now too, but it's a fight one has to fight. Even if defeat is inevitable.
The mood swings from seemingly ok to sad to angry are horrible to witness and process, but you must soldier on. Live goes on.
>>752487336
Refer to
>>752484221
>>752487492
You'll find someone who will make you feel what she made you feel, only stronger. You just have to be patient. Make your own path and meet someone on it. If you make someone a destination, you're dooming not only the relationship but yourself.
>>752487739
Youre a fag, as is everyone who posts that image. Bunch of pathetic retards who think a girl is the answer to all your problems.
>>752487760
Message her. Let her know you miss her. Hope isn't lost.
>>752487945
Having someone who's always there whenever anything bad happens in your life. Of course lots of people including me think a significant other will lead to a life of somewhat happiness
>>752487945
She died.
>>752487832
She didn't deserve you, Anon. She only wanted the attention you gave her. She never loved you and only wanted to drain your emotions. You can and will do better.
>>752487882
Was there defeat, for you? For him..?
>>752487581
Maybe it's for the best, at least I'm not addicted to drugs like some frat douchebags
>>752488101
Then you and a lot of people are mentally children with a lot to learn.
>>752487945
The only thing wrong about your statement is that the girl is the problem for some of us, not the answer.
>>752478685
Wonder what it would be like to molest your inner child.
>>752484020
>Name
Doesn't matter.
>Hair color.
Brown. Think it's black now, I forget.
>What did you like about her?
Everything. There was very little not to.
>How did you lose her?
Convoluted fuckery.
>>752487604
Like I said he's also struggles with addiction, he's become a different person. It's hard to have conversations with him. We're two completely different people and I wouldn't want him to associate with the people he hangs around. I just get uncomfortable around the things he gets involved with even if it's not illegal or if it is illegal it's just not my area.
>>752488182
He's stable, as long as he takes his meds.
One of the biggest issues with bipolar people is that at some points they believe they don't need to take the meds anymore, even though they do. They'll lie, pretend to take them while only throwing them away. And the cycle starts all over again.
There may not have been defeat, but there sure as hell ain't no victory. There's only the fight.
>>752488209
As someone who has dealt with depression my whole life. Yeah maybe my priorities are a little fucked. But you have no room to judge how other people want to be happy
>>752487739
night bro
>>752487621
I have a daughter, but I don't see her nearly as much as I'd like. Had her with a now ex-girlfriend who absolutely loathes me (its definitely very mutual) and yeah, the legal battles have been long and hard. Aside from that, no family.
Lilian got married recently, little over a year ago now. I wasn't there, saw a few of the pictures on Facebook though, it looked like an absolutely beautiful wedding. She's happy though; my place in her life isn't what it was years ago.
>>752487860
I'm sorry anon. As a man, I often close myself off instead of sharing my emotional burden. It's a tale as old as time. I'm sure she regrets a lot also.
>>752487748
more my guy
>>752488168
I appreciate your support but how did you get to this point anon?
I'm not even talking about JUST relationships but how do you just deal with people suddenly dropping you from their lives like a BRICK. I barely recognize the person she is now.
How can you just drop somebody from your life.
>>752487760
I'm assuming you moved for college. Other anon isn't wrong. Try it nigga
>>752488192
FUCK THIS FUCK EVERY THING.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wxb9qRygIDw
THIS IS OUR FUTURE.
R A C E
W A R
N O W
>>752487832
been there my guy, just move forward. Fuck that cunt, you're on /b/ my guy
>>752484736
>>752484736
BRUHHH!!!!!
>>752484020
I'm not telling you her name. She was blonde. A coworker at McCuck with me (I left about a month and a half ago). I liked the sound of her voice and the fact that she wasn't afraid to tell me to fuck off.
> knew how I felt the first moment I saw her
> decided I needed to become a better man, one that deserved to be with a girl like her
> after a few months, got depressed, gave up, she seemed to sour on me (we were actually somewhat friends for a while)
I think everything that's gone wrong for me in the past year can be traced directly back to giving up on becoming the man who deserved her.
> lost her by quitting the job for a higher-paying one in a pizzeria
>>752487860
Fuck dude, thats some heavy shit. The emotional toll must've been devastating. Just want you to know it's not your fault. Don't feel bad for her or for yourself it was out of your control.
It's been good to talk about my breakup with you anons. I think it's helped me a little. Hope everything turns around for you guys. Remember the grass is always greener on the other side.
>>752478260
Eh, life contracted to a point where I only relate superficially to people now.
Lost most of the people I cared about. Treacherous assholes in all honesty. Better off without them.
Still, don't have the one person that I actually give a fuck about.
Hates me, in fact.
Not a fun feeling.
>>752488452
cutest photo i took of her
not so cute to me anymore but here u go
freckles arent so noticeable in this picture but she has plenty, especially on her chest and arms.
>>752488369
I hope he can come back. I hope it's not too late for him.
>>752488392
I'm ready to fight. But. He won't let me. So all I can do is watch helplessly.
I can't imagine what that must have been like for you, as a kid, watching the euphoria & resulting crash. Am glad there wasn't defeat for you.
>>752479566
You have your own share of suffering and other people have theirs. You cannot compare your happiness to that of others, and same goes for feeling down. I mean, everyone feels the ups and downs man. Nothing big - unless you a chairty / welfare whore
>>752487945
I know people who troll these usually like to see the content. I mean you're surfing you don't want to be exposed and seem weak but again who cares what you think or how you think on this thread it'll be gone in a couple hours.
As much as I don't like you, i agree with you. Women aren't the answer. to be a better person you have to better yourself and that comes with all aspects of life. some people like to think when their young they need love in their life to be happy, but it doesn't hit them til they lose someone close that you have to be independant before you can love someone.
Tl:dnr
i hope you win the lottery and die the next day, so you're daughter has to watch you get lowered in your grave.
>>752488960
Listen to what this anon says
>>752488691
Can someone please advise me on how to get over this? I had these feelings for her for a solid year and never once acted on them. I wish I could let it go, even if I went back there and told her how I felt it wouldn't get me anywhere. She doesn't deserve the burden of knowing how I felt.
I CANT TAKE THIS ANYMORE
I WANT TO DIE FACELESS IN A CROWD OF MY BROTHERS DYING IN SOME WAR WE NEVER BELIEVED IN BUT WERE CALLED TO SERVE.
at least then I'd have purpose
At least then I'd have reason
at least then I'll die proud...
>>752488423
probably the hardest part is seeing people live without you and not noticing. Raise your kid good my guy
>>752479581
Story of my life nigga, went from BFF to platonic to BF and DUMPED for a chad. All in the span of a few months. Still talk to her from time to time. Think I should stop though.
Cant just 'reverse' my feelings for her and everything. I am just keeping in touch for the moral high ground.
>>752480800
Sound advice man.
>>752486563
NICE.
>>752487262
Trust yourself man, thats what I am doing. Dont put all the eggs in one basket like
>>752487555
PREACH IT TO THE CROWD
I've got a girl in my life that I really like. Not sure how to tell her. She's a coworker and I also work with her half-brother. I need help.
>>752489098
If you have nothing more to live for, the military could give you purpose. They will destroy anything that once resembled the man you were and build you up as a killing machine.
>>752484020
N K
Brunette
Everything, was pretty much her way of doing things.
Got dumped hey.
>>752489046
I'm assuming same as
>>752488691
If so, Green text it, theres more details than what you gave us. Did you date her? or was it just a crush that went flop. If it's the second then it cna't be that hard to get over
>>752489308
Why'd she dump you, Anon?
>>752488369
I'm sorry to keep getting into your conversation. I'm the anon with the bipolar dad.
It's not healthy, it's not pretty, it's not nice and it might not even work, but: sometimes you need to force your family to get better. Sometimes words and arguments aren't enough and you need to commit then into a mental institution. I had to do it with my dad, and it was horrible, but it helped.
I got to call an ambulance and watch him scream, cry and whail while he was being taken. I got to watch him walk around like a zombie, high on god knows how may meds. To watch my mom getting so drunk on wine the toilet was tinted purple every night. I watched my brother distance himself from any responsability he had. And i watched both sides of my extended family make everything worse by getting on each other's throats. I got to wreck my mind keeping the family together, which was hard as the youngest in the entire family.
But now we're together, we're not perfect bu we're ok. We keep fighting the good fight and we'll probably keep on fighitng it until my parents die. And i'll carry every memory and scar from my childhood with an unmedicated bipolar father, a depressive mother, and what i had to do to keep us together. But last month the whole extended family were all together for my dad's birthday and i can tell you it's fucking worth it.
>>752489279
Society has turned its back on its creators. White men. But who still caters to its every need? Who still fights its wars? Who still builds it up when its fallen? White men.
>>752489308
How long as it been since you talked to her, also when did you guys break up
>>752484686
FUCK
>>752489456
I'm proud for you, but for me it's not worth the hassle. My brother just has personality traits that are not beneficial. He's seen professional help plenty of times but he likes to think they're going to steal his brain or some bat shit crazy thing. Maybe after a while when he's older I'll try and mend it but now he's too unstable and too violent to even help and he rejects any and all help.
>>752484020
>What's her name anons?
Changes daily.
>Hair color.
Does so as well.
>What did you like about her?
Her elusiveness. Ultimately dating the same person in the end, just in different variations.
Platonic in a sense, but it's still a pity.
Her last transformation was spectacular.
>How did you lose her?
Because I chose to know.
>>752487832
She will get old and used up with all kinds of issues and will not be able to love or be loyal to anyone because she has ruined herself with her years of riding on the cock carousel. You will move on and do way better if you learn from this. Eat pray cats for her.
>>752489786
Chose to know...?
>>752489456
No sorry. I wish you hadn't seen what you have but I love the last line. It was worth it.
I'm hoping it will be for me too. But my bipolar one isn't family. He's somebody am in love with. It's easier for him to push me away & ignore me. I can't fight as hard as I want to. Like you did with your fam.
>>752489786
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rSdEzxC0W-U
I get it now.
You're never coming back to me.
I'll get you eventually though.
There's really no other way for it to be.
>>752484020
Mon
Blonde/brown mixed
Her laugh, the atmosphere she created whenever she was around, her eyes, her honesty, her confidence, her sarcasm, her arm scratches, how she would always be curled up against me in the morning when we woke up even if we fell asleep in another position, honestly everything about her god fucking dammit
I have no clue how I lost her. Things were good. We spent the past few months falling for each other. She was out of town visiting family, came back to the city, we grabbed dinner and spent the night in bed smoking bowls watching curb and making out. Next day, she dropped off the grid and called the next day and apologized and said she isn't in a good place to be in a relationship right now. Who am I to tell her anything to the contrary. I told her I understood, because I do, but it doesn't mean I'm happy.
I love this girl, so I'll let her go and see what happens. But I knew from the first night we met through our friends at a bar that she was special. We connected. She suggested we split from our friends and grab drinks at a different bar and talk. So we did. We danced there and kissed. She asked if I wanted to leave with her and I said yes. I got us a cab and we made out the entire ride back to my place and tipped the driver for him dealing with it. I've dated a number of girls, I was in a 4 year relationship with a wonderful girl that ended last year. We had mindblowing sex, followed by walking my dog and smoking a blunt and snuggling up on a bench in a park at 4 in the morning. Something about that scene plays back in my mind like a movie. I couldn't imagine a better introduction to the girl I would find myself falling in love with.
I've never met anybody who has made such a beautiful impact on my life as she has. I hope she changes her mind. She suggested we give each other space, but stay friends. Easier said than done but I just don't really believe this is where it ends. It's been 2 days, I'm a mess.
>>752489752
Anon, if that's the case, you should just cut all ties with your brother. Pray for him if you're religious but you need to move on with your life. If he ever asks why, be honest.
>>752489836
Ignorance is bliss.
>>752487760
I know when I get a chance to see her again everything will be fine, its literally the only thing thing in this world that i am optimistic about. I've gone to Korea for a year, I've gone to Afghanistan for a year, I've buried the my friends I've faced so many difficulties but the one that hits home is the fact that I lost her, but I'll get her back
>>752487990
>>752488506
She does miss me, but i can't help but think if I'm not good enough for her. thats what scares me
>>752484686
right in the fucking feels
>>752488473
It takes time. It's going to hurt for a while. But you have to live for yourself instead of other people, ultimately. At the end of the day, you're all you got, so you have to look after yourself. People will come and go, but you'll always have yourself as long as you're on this rock.
>>752484020
ND
brunette
most everything, she was my best friend
tl;dr: she stopped lovin me. took her for granted.
wouldnt be so bad, cept we were together for the majority of our lives and kids are a thing. kicked me out, had to move outta state. she brings her new guys to the house, confusing the kids.
mfw too broke and hopeless to change it.
mfw im too angry and mentally destroyed to do anything.
>>752489185
That's the plan, man. So far, its been difficult but really, the best things always require effort. I'm in it for the long run.
>>752484020
Rosemarie
she's beautiful in every way possible
I never had her
never will
>>752489951
You're giving her space which is good, but of course, fight for her if you want her. Again I don't know her as well as you do. Sounds like youre doing things right even if you lose her at least you have that memory
>>752489896
>He's somebody am in love with
Then >>752489987
It will hurt, but it's for the best.
>>752489987
I have pretty much, my only interactions are if he's at holidays. I don't reach out to him.
>>752490049
Anon, you still have a chance. You have it within yourself. Don't hesitate Take charge and let that woman know that you're the man for her.
>>752490049
Even if you aren't good enough for her, she's good for you. She'll help you shine. But before you commit make sure you work on yourself you have to find happiness within yourself.
>>752490162
She's a cunt, fuck her anon. I would hate to be burned that bad. Can I ask why you had to move out of state
>>752484483
I cant help it to cry to this song
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z4CXD5cdhcc
Having difficulty getting a grip on anything.
Very directionless. Don't particularly want to do much. Everything I figured out I want to do was shown to me.
I missed out.
This blows.
>>752490197
Never. I will never give up on him. Will willingly hurt for him indefinitely, to be there for him, have hope in him. Only if it hurts him, would I let him go.
Even if I'm being fucking retarded & what you say is definitely the smart & healthy thing to do. I won't. I love.
>>752489454
It was abrupt, she just up and left me for some other guy she apparently had had feelings for a long long time.
>>752489537
Talked to her a week ago, text maybe once a day. Broke up in July brother.
>>752489232
Thats me btw
>>752489424
I've had crushes that went flop before, they're trivial to get over. I never dated her; you're right this should be easy to get over; it's a sunk-cost fallacy coupled with my own gnawing feelings of inadequacy.
> Start job at McCuck mid 2016
> meet her sometime around then
> develop crush on her
> like the sound of her voice, get along well with her, she's kind of a strong woman but not bitchy (idk how to word it, I guess confident is the word. I'm not like a sub or something, I just like women who can challenge me)
> time goes on, we're work friends, we bond over love of animals, shit like that
> October 2016, decide "I'm gonna ask her out sometime in november"
> for whatever reason don't ask her out
> uni gets more stressful, seasonal affective disorder kicks in, become more of a dick around work
> she gets colder, more or less stops talking to me, we're purely professional
> give up on her
> months wear on, become borderline suicidal
> almost fail out of uni
> suddenly a new girl gets hired
> most gorgeous woman I ever met
> desparation translates into chad-tier self-assurance, get with her
> she's a drunken emotional parasite
> relationship lasts a few months, crashes and burns hard
> have mega self-confidence now
> try to bang some other girl, get rejected
> stagnation
> momentum dissipates
> start drinking more
> go back to work, about two months ago
> have bottle of coca-cola/vodka on me
> see the girl I was telling you about
> feel some sort of actual hope that I could be her man
> start trying to turn things around, maybe making some progress idk
> get a new job
> uni gets hard as fuck
> rarely at McCuck, when I am I'm visibly tired and stressed out, people don't like working wiith me
> say screw this, cut my losses and depart amicably
> haven't spoken to her since
I think there was a timeline split at the moment I was going to ask her out and we're in the timeline where I didn't. The moral of the story is don't give up on your dreams.
>>752489951
It's probably not you, Anon. It's her. This sounds like she doesn't have it within herself to give you what she thinks you deserve. She loves you just as much as you love her, and I'm sure she's in a lot of pain. Just play it safe and try to occupy your mind with other things. She'll come back.
>>752490168
I have a coworker who's maybe 4 years older than me, maybe less. He has a daughter who's 2 and his ex wife is a bitch too, and we worker really fast pace jobs, and when he can he facetimes her and has conversations with her before our days go to shit. I hope i can be half the father that guy is to his daughter, and i hope you make your daughter proud as well
>>752490171
Fuck dude hit too hard for my ass.
Wanna share more?
>>752490401
lol its pretty much the worst case scenario. had to move cos she wanted me out (i didnt want turbulence for the kids' sake) and i had literally 0 friends to help me out. beforehand i had to quit my job cos we couldnt afford daycare. had to sell my car cos her hours were cut and didnt need. it sounds like a sucker moveset but i was with this girl for more than half my life. i trusted in her more than anyone at that point.
>>752490641
This is unintentionally fucking hilarious.
>>752490309
>>752490264
No matter what, even if it ends, if it is able to run its natural course i feel like everything will be better.
The whole reason it ended was distance of the military- we weren't dating long enough for anything to be steady and i got weird stations
I know she misses me from her own words.
She admitted to wondering what our lives woulda been like if I was able to take her or I never left
>>752490491
I was left like that too, she left me and fucked a different dude the next week. Like they wanted to spare us from being cheated on. At least we weren't cheated on. But still it feels the same.
>>752490457
What a pure thing to feel, but anon it will be your end.
I urge you to take a stance, i've told you the two roads that you can take. Pick one and do it sooner rather than later.
Either you get him commited into a mental institution or you walk. There's no other way you might find peace.
>>752490496
Next time execute anon, let this be a lesson, you missed out by holding back.
>>752490568
>it made a difference to that one
Christ. Rock on, little dude
>>752490568
That's a rough situation to be in, the dude has my sympathy. I'm trying to live in a way that will make her proud of me one day. Quite drinking so damn much, quit smoking, started working out, started the band I've always wanted to start; just started making things better. Its amazing what that can do for a person.
>>752490752
fuck. this is some srs truth.
>>hurtsalmostworse.jpg
>>752484020
Emma
Blonde
When I was a broken man like all the king's men she'd always find a way to put me back together again
Although one can never lose what one has never had, it's the closest i've ever been.
>>752490558
We're going to hang out and talk a bit this weekend, which will be nice regardless of the outcome. I have final exams over the next 2.5 weeks, so it's a good opportunity to take a step back and keep my mind elsewhere.
The only time it fucks me up is late at night, like now, when my mind feels like replaying all of the little perfect moments we shared.
I believe I'm insolubly fucked and just missed my ticket out of Hell.
>>752484020
Amanda
Black
She was understanding, she genuinely wanted to be with me, and though her laugh was seldom it was worth it
I fell into a cycle of self pity and started to lose touch with her. She realized I don't want kids and dumped me yesterday.
>>752490752
Whats the difference man, these are emotions - you cant just stop feeling things for someone. It was a dick move, but hey plenty of fish in the water man.
Lets try this again in a few months I mean, take all the emotions to help be better OR just focus on better things in life.
>>752490996
You'll get another faggot, nothing is ever over.
>>752490440
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pMErlY2CIs0
This song always makes me feel something. I listened to it when i was depressed when a girl left me for another guy. I rediscovered it when my grandpa was on his death bed. I helped my buddy at a funeral home so we had my grandpas funeral there. I had more to do with my grandpas funeral, i felt a sense of pride. I remember organizing things in the funeral home keeping busy and just trying not to think, and then finally I stood by my dad and looked at the casket surrounded by flowers and I was overwelhmed so much by the emotions of my family and how much my grandpa impacted my life. I miss that guy
>>752491032
>You'll get another faggot.
Maybe. The possibilities are slim, and it's foolish to be hopeful.
>>752487909
I see them but I’ll also never have them.
>>752491162
You'll do just fine my man. Dont worry about that.
>>752490945
Read a study and the worst kind of pain after a break up is knowing that you were inadequate and being easily replaced.
I'd hate to do that to anyone
Can we get more pics? it's the only thing that helps me feel anything at all anymore
>>752491197
Nah, I am genuinely terrified for the well being of my sanity, soul... and someone else.
Man, I really, really REALLY fucked up.
Holeeeee shit.
>>752484815
god damn :,{ rest in peace David higgs
>>752490671
Thats fucked I'm sorry, i sincerely hope things turn up for you and get better. Life ain't easy but if it was it'd be boring
>>752490745
It's hilarious but shit does it hit me in the feels
>>752491135
>I remember organizing things in the funeral home
That is more than enough to be proud of yourself, anon. It takes a stronger soul to be useful in a funeral.
>>752490747
Try it.
>>752490866
Thank you, for saying the things you do. Will think on this, truly.
>>752490904
Do me a favor and walker down that aisle at least at her wedding and it'll be worth it all if you see that happen.
>>752490974
Sounds like you have a lot of life to live. Go live it
>>752484020
Brianna
Dirty blonde
She was perfect in every way
I wasn't enough.
>>752491280
heh, i appreciate the compassion. youre literally the first sympathetic ear ive had since this bullshit happened. thanks anon.
>>752491028
Dude you don't want kids? We gotta keep up the pace of kids or jamals will out populate us
>>752490974
>it's the closest i've ever been.
Words that could fuck up any man.
>>752484020
Sophia.
Blue, though she has it blonde now.
She accepted me for who I was, and didn't try to change me at all. She was always lifting me up and being there for me, asking me how I was and messaging me, or spending time with me. She cared. She made me feel lucky to have found someone like her in my life. Cuddling with her was one of my fondest memories.
I have no idea. One day she told me she couldn't do it anymore, university was "stressing her out" and not seeing me enough was apparently painful for her, so she wanted to quit.
I'm still mad at her. She could've talked about it earlier if she wanted to fix our relationship. I know everything she said when we broke up was just an excuse.
She left around 2014. I've written her a letter that I've yet to send, haven't had the guts. May never do it. I've plugged it in these feels threads before. If anyone wants to read, let me know. It's nothing special.
>>752491032
I like drinking and going on these threads, reminds me of what i did when i was down. I had lots of fun on these threads, and i cried like a bitch but at the end of the night i slept like a baby.
>>752491272
These threads ain't just for sad circle jerks, I don't want my /b/ros to kill themselves cause a hoe got them down
>>752491598
I want to, anon. I've written love letters too. Been commended on my penmanship but little more, though.
i will prob be called a fag but yeah, im a guy and i've had alot of bad relationships with girls (one of wich almost made me kill myself) but over a week ago i start talking to this guy, we start getting really into each other, (yeah the gay kind) but he wants to be "friends with benifits" so now i feel like nothing wants me, he really makes me happy but my friends call me a loser, plus my dad is treating me like i dont exsist now, and my mom is sad cause she "wont have any kids" just kill me
>>752491672
This is some Death Grips shit lol
>>752491329
When my grandpa passed, I helped put him on the stretcher and transfer his body into the vehicle so they can store it and prep him. The day he was scheduled to be cremated i couldn't get out of bed, my buddy said "don't worry i got this. I understand." I fucking lost it after i hung up. I really love that friend. He's a good guy
>>752491414
KEK TRUE
>>752491611
I do the same, these threads have helped me lots
>>752491715
Dude isolation will fuck you up - WHEN IN DOUBT - NUT ONE OUT. Go to a titty bar my dude - you are not a fag.
>>752491696
You'll soon see it's less of a love letter and more of a confession.
>>752491473
Theres more to this or theres less to this. Explain faggot
>>752491801
it's hard to be social when you are just going to give up so fast like i always do
>>752491715
fuck people that dont support you man, dont pay attention to them
you already know their dark side, dont back off now
Ive been through that, let a girl go because of my family, now im stuck with a shitty group of people that dont really care about me and all alone in the world
even if that guy isnt your guy, keep waiting for someone that cares about you. you will find someone, just like i did
dont let them go for stupid stuff
should i forgive someone who ghosted me?
>>752491494
Hey man why not, I see these as support groups. It's where we can be vulnerable where we gain nothing from lying. We might not know the answer but at least a soul knows what you're going through and somewhat understands the gravity of youre situation.
I'll try and be on these feels threads my guy
>>752478260
my life is falling apart as i type this. Yesterday it wasn't. Feels surreal. Maybe is the lack of sleep. I have no idea what to do, be brave and risk even more or accept defeat and face shame?? fucking shit
>>752491744
That's a man to keep close, anon.
>>752491907
It depends.
Ghosting isn't always a malicious act. Sometimes the person ghosting fucked up and they're scared. They let the silence go on for too long. They don't know how they're going to start that first conversation and explain what happened. They don't want to risk the pain of hearing from the person they hurt that yes, they were hurt.
If that note is from the person who ghosted you, and you still have feelings for them or want them in your life, forgive them.
>>752478260
Go back to Tumblr
>>752491892
im going to sound like broken record cause it's been said before, and i always lurk in these type of threads but. i've had so many fuck-ups in my life that i just dont try to hold on anymore, anytime i hold on the other lets go because "im to clingy, or i act so desprate" well i wouldent be so desprate if happyness didint feel so rare to me, friends drift away, family dosent really care anymore, im just here, i try to be happy for others but never happy myself.
>>752491696
I say that because I was an awful human being to her
>>752492022
I fucked that one already, he's straight edge as hell. We had a group of friends and we wanted to go to a beach and i said i wanted to bring some beers to chill out and he sort of flipped and overreacted. He acted like he called the shots. He got mad because we weren't old enough to drink
hm,dunno if it belongs in a feels thread, but 6 months ago I was diagnosed with a bad case of tuberculosis
I was a pretty lanky dude, 6.46 ft for 143.3 lbs, but it dropped at 99 lbs after 5 months of isolation, where I couldn't even see my friends or family,and was just laying in bed heaving
now I'm out, I'm trying to get back to where I was (I took on a little speech impediment from not talking,and I can barely run) but it's just depressing because I desperately need a job even though I have the strength of a 10 yo and the lungs on a 40 yo smoker
but hey at least I never approached a girl so my mental health is fine I guess
>>752491837
Damn man, that's hard.
If there's something from my experiences that may be useful to you, it's this.
That letter is just for you, right more if you want them but they are just for you.
I might be good or terrible advice, i don't really know.
>>752478685
I got into mental health to do what I could to help people who have been dealt an absolute shit hand. I feel for your story. I wish the field was like that, y'know helping people who are legitimately struggling, but it's full of attention whores who have never struggled, really struggled a day in their life.
>>752491597
Why are you mad? she was crazy for you and wanted more of you. Do you guys still talk?
>>752491981
My life went from wonderful 48 hours ago, to having a massive void. It's hard for me to process the sudden absence of such a great person in my life.
Just be brave. Keep moving forward.
Here's one of my favorites by Charles Bukowski:
"How Is Your Heart?
during my worst times
on the park benches
in the jails
or living with
whores
I always had this certain
contentment-
I wouldn't call it
happiness-
it was more of an inner
balance
that settled for
whatever was occuring
and it helped in the
factories
and when relationships
went wrong
with the
girls.
it helped
through the
wars and the
hangovers
the backalley fights
the
hospitals.
to awaken in a cheap room
in a strange city and
pull up the shade-
this was the craziest kind of
contentment
and to walk across the floor
to an old dresser with a
cracked mirror-
see myself, ugly,
grinning at it all.
what matters most is
how well you
walk through the
fire."
>>752491907
You should just move on dude
>>752484020
>Ani
>light brown
>she was home
>i let her go because i dont deserve good things
i think we could have been really happy if i wasnt me
>>752492162
I struggle with it. I want her to know how sorry I am for everything; but at the same time, I feel like she deserves to remember me as the monster that I was, if it makes it easier for her. Perhaps I deserve that too. There's about 5 parts to this btw.
>>752484103
This fucking hit me right in the goddamn feels. Holy shit.
>>752490875
> next time
That's actually really encouraging man. thanks.
>>752492038
yeah that was him. I still care for him, but it tore me up when he did that, and he expects me to forget. it was a large part of my life the first time I dealt with something like that
>>752492301
Sometimes we overlook small things, attention to detail is a skill that needs to be sharpened.
>>752492260
>>752492194
I'm mad because I hate people who decide to call quits instead of trying to fix the situation. I'm really flexible when it comes to things, I don't mind going out of my own routine to accommodate to someone else. She could've just told me "hey, I can we see each other more often throughout the week?" instead of just dumping me.
No. When we broke up she said she wanted to keep being friends. I tried to talk to her twice, both times we exchanged a few messages and she stopped replying. I haven't tried since my last attempt some months ago.
I should sleep. Thanks for replying. I appreciate it.
>>752492113
We all get into petty arguments with our friends, just text him and go get beers or whatever. All you need to know is let him know you're not mad, and that you don't blame him.
>>752492320
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AO_t7GtXO6w
ABC anon Always be closing
can we get some more feely pics goin.
>>752492436
The ride never ends friends
Almost to the end. If anyone is reading.
>>752492481
of course dude, night. Fuck that cunt and find a new girl
>>752492592
>>752492487
I think he's the one thats mad at me. For our 21st birthday (we share a b-day) I was thinking of texting him asking if he wanted to get a beer.
Five years I spent with her. I haven't spoken to her, seen her or heard about her from anyone since she walked out. She was verbal about how little I meant anymore. There's so much left unsaid.
>>752492607
After spending a lot of time going after THOTs and all, I am going to join the military - live out my warrior spirit ))
>>752492522
like this?
>>752492259
>I want her to know how sorry I am for everything; but at the same time, I feel like she deserves to remember me as the monster that I was
That's a short letter you need to write. Something along the lines of "You deserve to remember me as the monster that i was, but i want you to know how sorry i am for everything."
>>752492788
anything thats feelsy, pretty much the only thing that helps me feel anything anymore
>>752492481
Your second paragraph is the biggest fear I have right now.
She told me she still really wants to be friends. I'm letting her take the lead on that one because I don't want to put myself out there and feel like a piece of shit for trying when she may have just been saying that to be kind.
Hopefully she meant it though.
>>752492829
>>752492210
fuck. thnx anon. really. that right there might be it. i hope
How to detect homos
Make a feels thread
????
Profit
>>752492861
i miss my dog now
>>752492861
Rip pupper :(
>>752492910
Bukowski's writings helped me steer my ship through some rough waters.
I ended a 4 year relationship with a girl who was my best friend and the only way I can describe how I felt was "lost". A combination of sadness, confusion, anger, regret, and whatever else.
His collection of poetry in "You Get So Alone at Times That It Just Makes Sense" may help you steer your ship as well.
Good luck
>>752492802
Maybe one day. Thanks for reading.
is it karma that fucks you up? i see worse people than me doing better all the time and better people than me doing worse so that cant be it. So what the fuck is this?
>>752492213
This felt a little crazy to read, then i thought about having a gf that constantly stesses out my 12 year old dog.
Fuck that. I love my dog.
Hey all you sad motherfuckers.
Whatever "it" is, it'll be alright. It's okay to be sad sometimes, and it's okay to be sad for a little while at a time. But as long as you trudge on it'll be alright. Don't believe in the bullshit that "things happen for a reason" and "if it's meant to be it's meant to be". You earn what you work for. So if you're sad now, that's fine. But don't stay down; get up. And if it gets to be too much at some point, that's fine too. But get back up.
And as a last bit of advice, hold true the quote, "A good beginning makes a good end" from Louis L'Amour. When you wake up do something like make your bed, or take out the trash, cook breakfast, whatever. That way you can start the day off right and when you get to the end of the day you can always say, if nothing else, "Well at least I did XXXXX"
>>752492718
Man, text him. Even if he's not over it already all you have to do is admit your fault and ask him out for beers.
