Christian shitpost thread
I need some awful memes please
Science flies you to the moon religion flies you into buildings.jpg
my fav.
Guys I need pro Christianity ones
>>752258681
there is no one that autistic to make positive christian memes kek
I wish I were born 100 years later, when religion will be remembered only as this goofy, silly, collective hallucinations that people had due to some manipulative hustlers. It will be treated just like now we treat Santa Claus, baba yaga, unicorns and goblins.
It will be beautiful century
>>752258150
Actually science builds airplanes that fly into buildings.
Christians 1, Atheists 0
>>752258379
"The Satanic Bible"
wew, lad
>>752259154
That most likely wont happen... Religion is expanding.
>>752259440
Atheists were predicting a hundred years ago that religion would be gone by mid-century, and at mid-century that it would be gone by the year 2000. It's one of their dogmatic traditions.
>>752257952
isn't Keanu Reeves chinese or something?
why you posting christian memes with chinese people on them? the chinese don't believe in jesus
>>752258379
the bible does not say that is ok
its mentioned in the old jaws of judia that are overturned
thats like saying a history book on ww2 says genocide is ok
>>752259212
>Implying science is designing planes that fly into buildings on their own
Step it up fam your arguments are weak as shit
>inb4 "I was only pretending to be retarded"
>>752258379
Lucifer. One of the strongest entities in the cosmos. I see nothing wrong here.
My favorite.
>>752259754
Shits been debunked forever ago
>>752259754
Lmao he was making a joke you downy
>>752259745
>its mentioned in the old jaws of judia that are overturned
But stuff like the 10 commandments are ok to cherry pick out of the old laws because they fit with our current culture?
Where does it say which laws were officially retconed in the Christian lore?
>>752258681
Well I guess I'm about to be lynched but r/dankchristianmemes is fucking hilarious whether you're Christian or atheist
ya'l niggas need Jesus.
Aint no other brother turning water into wine and healing crippled assed fools
jesus is science nigga, the hospitals n sheit woudnt be around unless jesus made us in the first place.
>>752259754
>Haha be intelligent before you battle me in a game of wits you checkers playing degenerate
>>752260559
fuck wrong thumbnail
meant this one
>>752258681
Here's a wholesome christian meme just for you
Religious faggots are the worst, esp. this new wave of alt right meme faggots that pretend to be religious just to follow the whole le /pol/ alt right theme
>>752261045
Watching you all the time. Every second that goes by in every minute of your life, Every hour of every day he watches you. And me too. He watches all 7.65 Billion of us. And if one time you break his specific guidlines, HE WILL SEE.
and oh boy, HE WILL PUNISH.
When you die, you will be sent to a place of fire and burning, of eternal pain and screaming. You will be trapped there till the end of time as punishment.
But he loves you though. He loves you so much. Oh, and he needs money.
all powerful, all-knowing, our creator,
just cant handle the money (even though they pay no taxes)
I love my lord and saviour,i hope i make it through life unblemished so I can rejoin my Grammy and Jenny in the big cloud land in the sky :) I'm not scared of dying because i wont even be dead!! I will be alive up in heaven for all of time, with all the people i love and sunday roast for dinner everynight, and sunshine all day and it only rains at night while i'm all snug in bed and going to sleep with a big smile on my face :) I'l be looking down on you burning in the bubbling lava pits of hell so glad i didnt break the rules
>>752259629
>atheists
>dogmatic traditions
>>752259745
Remember when Jesus destroyed the law in Matthew 5:17?
>>752258681
does this one counts?
>>752258681
This thread is why Santa is kill
>>752259745
>God isn't a fucking sociopathic asshole, guise
>He changed his mind about all that crazy, arbitrary bullshit
>I mean, like come on
>>752264693
Remember in Matthew 5:18 where Jeebus said that not a jot or tittle of the law would be changed?
If you are looking for a book filled with contradictions, absurdities, horrific atrocities and immoral teachings, look no further than the Bible.
>>752265841
name 1
>>752257952
Jesus was a Jew
>>752265908
Okay, an example of an immoral teaching would be the selling of your own daughter into slavery
Exodus 21:7-11
An example of an atrocity would be the killing of the first born male Egyptian children in the Passover myth. I could go on but I won’t be bothered to reveal the teachings of what I assume is your holy book?
>>752265459
real?
>>752266673
immoral why? if you cant give your daughter a good life, seling her as slavery would be great, slavery provided people food and a home
also God warned the pharaoh about letting his people go or face the consequenses, he play tough and he got what he deserved, that blood is in the pharaoh hands, not God's
>>752266208
so?
>>752267189
If you think slavery can be justified then you are morally corrupt. Also, you need to reread your fanciful Pharoah story. Your god hardens the heart of the Pharoah against releasing the Heebs. Read...your...fucking...book.
>>752267493
that's showing you that somethings you dont have second times, he had a chance, he wasted it
>>752267641
Can you write in English?
>>752267773
sometimes you dont have second chances hoho
>>752267773
so you better repent and accept Christ as Lord and Saviour or you are going to burn in hell all eternity
>>752268228
Lol, kthanx
>>752268502
so what do you think you can do other than accept Christ to save your soul?
>>752267189
You're a dumbass nigger who got abused by a priest by a child. Hence the Stockholm syndrome.
>>752265779
god clearly has some serious borderline personality disorder
>>752269079
>other fag acting tough
YOU ARE GOING TO GET REKT MATE BY GOD
>>752259307
That's the name of the book they sell, no more "wew" worthy than "Jurassic Park" or some other novel.
Repent or burn forever in a lake of fire.
>>752269938
>believe in the bible
But nobody does this
Not even priests have read the whole book
Most theists don't ever finish reading the whole thing because that would be a lot of work
A true Christian would be going out and stoning non believers to death
A good Christian would kill his wife for not being a virgin at marriage
A real Christian does not use electronic devices because technology is the devils craft
A real Christian only listens to the harp
All other instruments are devils craft
>>752265459
Sauce???
>>752270336
yawn
>>752259745
The new testament brought nothing new except Jesus
Jesus teaches you must obey the old testament for they are his father (gods) teachings
Christianity is just Judaism with Jesus
>>752260419
I show this to theists and they're like "god is more than those things" like wtf nigga
Do all theists smoke crack for breakfast?
Did they even grasp the meaning of what he is saying?
Morons
>>752270336
Are you retarded?
Psalm 150:
Praise ye the lord. Praise God in his sanctuary: praise him in the firmament of his power.
Praise him for his micty acts: praise him according to his excellent greatness.
Praise him with the sound of the TRUMPET: praise him with the PSALTRERY and harp.
Praise him with the TIMBREL and dance: praise him with STRINGED INSTRUMENTS and ORGANS.
Praise him upon the loud CYMBALS: Praise him upon the high sounding CYMBALS...
One psalm, hell of a lot more than a harp mentioned. Also there's references to drums in other passages. Ex-religiofag here.
If god is all powerful why are his messages written on paper in ancient language and not written into our dna?
Should we not be able to tell good from bad naturally?
Do we learn bad from good from books?
>>752271351
it's on our DNA, even the Bible tell you that
you can ignore it tho
>>752265000
Cringe
>>752265068
Post the Full image faggot
I know damn well pepe cummed and shit in those brownies
>>752261177
> not wanting a mate with the emissions of a coal train
>>752260419
Tell me friend, how would you learn to abhor evil without first experiencing it?
>>752265228
Except atheists celebrate giftmas
Santa clause is owned by coca cola
Christmas is a pegan ritual
Jesus was not born on the 25th
Jews are in control of christmas
I just like all the bright lights and gift giving
>>752270336
>>752270965
Ex-religiofag cont.
Many people have read the entire bible multiple times. The standard is once a year - the churches I've been to almost all had some form of a reading schedule for each week that would result in reading the entire thing over the course of a year.
Believing it is a different story, I can't speak for adults to say if any are true believers or not. I know as a kid I was.
An actual "Christian" would be by definition Christ-like. That doesn't involve going out and stoning people - Christ was characterized as a teacher of philosophy and religion. He didn't go around trying to slay Romans for being nonbelievers. Also, he was the kind of person who went around cursing fig trees for not bearing fruit during the season which they don't..
A Christian (or rather his community) would stone an adulterer, so at least you got one thing right.
Technology is neither godly or godless. There's no reference to it in the bible as it didn't exist yet. If you're going off Amish logic, sure, but that doesn't apply to Christianity.
Don't get me wrong here, I'm not here to advocate Christianity. But if you want to point out the problems, at least be remotely fuckin' accurate.
Example: a true christian wouldn't wear mixed cloth clothing.
>>752261123
fuck thats awesome
>>752271466
More like religion is a unintended byproduct of evolutionary biology.
>>752271988
evolution is a meme grow up
>>752267386
Christianity is Judaism plus Jesus
Christians are jews
>>752272236
jews were a close club, so God said no guys i want everyone, they didnt liked it and made their own fanfic religion, Christianity is the truth
>>752257952
white people shouldn't be christian at least
>>752268769
>soul
>believing in an after life
This is why the world is so fucked and scientists are trying to find a new world to escape to
You faggots don't even care about the life you live and the planet you inhabit
All you care about is your own selfish desires
You want eternal pleasure for yourself and eternal punishment for those you don't like
>>752272385
>>752272499
why would you if you are going to die anyway, life for the next life that's eternal
what the fuck is this>>752272508
kys
![8xsGnV3oMQdjHEV0Vf20zVp7tn76dNKAH6r2L1yBr29Ovke6vg-s8UMbTc6e4oDO7AXvBHT9TA=w640-h400-e365[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/cAtAWD4.jpg "8xsGnV3oMQdjHEV0Vf20zVp7tn76dNKAH6r2L1yBr29Ovke6vg-s8UMbTc6e4oDO7AXvBHT9TA=w640-h400-e365[1].jpg")
God is a password to the next level, anon. Even if you don't "believe" you have to provide the password when you die.
>>752272626
>>752272688
Wow, Jesus is in to three ways? With kids no less?
Gives whole new meaning to "suffer the children"
>>752272008
In what context is it okay to send bears to maul the faces of children?
For calling a girl "bald head"?
Only if you're the Christian god!
What context is it okay to stone your children to death?
According to Christian god, if they argue with you!
Cont?
>>752272431
Neither should blacks
That's the religion which has enslaved them for centuries
Well Christianity and jews actually
>>752273059
>>752272584
live for the next life OOPS
>>752272584
There is no next life
This is all you get and you are wasting it
You enslaved yourself
Religion is a book for power and control
Nothing more nothing less
>>752257952
>>752265068
this just a wholesome pepe
>>752257952
this
>>752262641
the sequels always suck
>>752257952
2
>>752273597
>>752273388
God is not religion, you like it or not is the truth, you want to die AND ALL OF YOU WHO ARENT SAVED ARE IN FOR A BIG UGLY ETERNAL LIFE
look do this:
>9 Because if you confess with your mouth “Jesus is Lord” and in your heart you have faith that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. 10 Trusting with the heart leads to righteousness, and confessing with the mouth leads to salvation.
Romans 10:9
do it, save your SOUL DUDEEEEEE SAVE IT!!!! THROUGH JESUSSSS!!!! AAAAH
>>752257952
44
Fuck, these are really cringe, aren't they?
>>752257952
420
>>752257952
god damnit
what was fun about that road?
>>752257952
4202
>>752259745
If God is omnipotent then why does he change his mind. Also the bible states that he doesnt, and also that he does.... so yea, your argument is invalid.
>>752269569
Sure Dante.
>>752273712
< Cringe >
>>752259154
I wish I was born 100 years earlier, when religion was the single bastion of truth and glory in the lives of of all men. God was treated with respect by nearly all, and we lived with respect toward one another.
It was a beautiful century
>>752270465
I do physical labor, I don't need a gym.
I think rationally, I don't need church.
>>752262717
RIP George Carlin
>>752273877
Circumcision is white genocide by jews
They make a fortune selling your 4
Fourskin
>>752274401
>>752259154
Born too late to explore the unknown world.
Born too early to explore the unknown universe.
What a sad state of existence in which we live.
>>752274341
< HE'S GOING TO BURN IN HELL ALL ETERNITY >
like wtf dude, like ugh
>>752274482
>rationally
>muh 20 genders are totally rational
YOU FUCKING ATHEIST!!!
>>752270802
>imply she's not old enough to remember Nietzsche
>>752274492
>tfw george carlin is burning in hell right now
>>752262717
>there are only 2 places after you die
>hell or heaven
>but you dont want or believe in God, so you walk yourself to hell
>God could have saved you but you rejected his offer
>somehow it's God's fault
you fucking atheist!!! !!!!
>>752274482
>>752274199
The bible is FULL of contradictions
It was written by men not god
Bibviz.com
>>752274575
>threatening with eternal torture for something so small
You worship evil
You are a Satanist
>>752273489
Thanks anon. What a great infographic
>>752273722
basically when I realized this around age 13, I was like wow, everyone is retarded, and I quit going to church.
>>752275043
im not threatening you, im warning you! you are going to burn in hell if you dont accept Jesus gift of salvation, just accept it, say thanks Lord Jesus for your gift i accept you, and you dodge hell
easy as that, are you going to do it? if you dont why the fuck do you blame God
>>752274504
You are absolutely correct that hospitals secretly sell the foreskin for a shitload of money, but don't go calling it white genocide. That doesn't even make sense anon.
Don't destroy the truth with nonsense!
>>752257952
good you deserve it for losing all your critical thinking skills through indoctrination
I'm not mad at you. I'm mad at your parents for brainwashing you
>>752275194
You are threatening me
God would not allow evil to exist and have power over him
God is not real
You worship evil
>>752274942
Here you forgot this.
>>752275397
Jesus literally says tempation need to exist, he said come to me if you want to live, but you wont YOU WONT ACCEPT HIM and when you die, you are going to be in from of him, like wtf dude i thought you werent real, and he's going to say i warned you bro, so many times and you didnt listen, and you are going to be like dang, and burn in hell all eternity
not worth it bro, you still have time accept Jesus Christ
>>752274504
facebook quality meme.
>>752274647
lol wut
>>752275397
evil exists like darkness exists. darkness is just the absence of light. evil is just the absence of good.
>>752274905
i don't get it.
>>752271938
How about when he said,
>Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword
Then he build a whip and beat the shit out of some merchants
>>752275582
All these niggas be trolling as soon as they stub day toe day cry out O god please make it stop. When they mommy and daddy lay dieing day pray please God don't tale dem but day don know he can't hear dem cause day full of da sin and never asked God to forgives dem.
>>752275736
You sick you need a doctor.
>>752275630
And "good" is completely subjective.
Torturing and killing people that knew how to use healing herbs as "witches" was considered "good" at one time.
Putting Galeo into prison for studying the sun was also "good"
>>752275982
Nigger detected.
>>752276092
O all dat persecution come from man baby dat didn't come from God man uses Gods word and twists for day own ends but God know and you have to read dat Bible so you know too,
>>752276207
>>752275582
Nice store you have here, Shame if something where to happen to it, But if you come before me, and give me access to the till, You'll be just fine.
Don't say I didn't warn you when you're burning alive in a building fire.
Not worth it bro, You'd better just pay, you still have time
>>752274401
Not true at all. Islam was the second largest religion back then just like it is now. Hinduism was the third. Learn basic facts.
^
^ ^
>>752276315
How did you determine which parts where written by God, And which parts where twisted by man?
>>752276772
Mmm hmmm
>>752276867
https://youtu.be/XpSOWfFtKJE
>>752276712
>literally Jesus offers you salvation for free
>the only thing you have to do is accept it
>he wont
LIKE DUUUUUDE, IT'S FREE JUST TAKE IT MAN
>>752276867
none of the bible was written by god. the bible is god's teachings through people that had experienced them. like you said yourself it's all subjective anyway
>>752277141
No. I dont want it. Jesus is a fag and I dont want to hang out with him. Ill take hell pls.
https://youtu.be/bFEoMO0pc7k
>>752257952
when was the last time you gave everything youy owned to the poor and followed jesus?
>>752277122
>>752277376
>he believes in the moon landing
>believing what liars tell you what you have to believe
>>752277141
Let's try this again
I have a shotgun to your head, Worship me every day for the rest of your life, Spread my message to non-believers, dismiss all fact and evidence to the contrary, and attribute all good fortune to me, or i'll blow your fucking head off and bury you in the basement
Take the deal, it's literally free, all you have to do is accept it, Nothing immoral here at all.
>>752275210
>a lion is evil
Christians can be so stupid at times, especially the ones on normiebook.
>>752277623
you are just walking to your doom being sick of a weird disease, you are going to die if you dont turn to your right and knock the door of a dude that have the cure, the dude is going to give you the cure for free, the only thing you have to do is knock the door and accept the cure, but you wont, you will keep walking to your doom, and the dude is on the door screming COME BACK YOU CUNT HERE'S THE CURE, YOU ARE GOING TO DIE IF YOU DONT COME HERE
and you are like nooo you want something from me
like
W
T
F
>>752277997
Here you forgot this.
>>752277997
>weird disease
You are born with a disease God created and gave you, You must accept God as your savior and he'll cure the disease at about the rate of chance.
At what point do you realize 'original sin', the sick perverted notion we are all born broken and in evil and must repent is IMMORAL. We live, we do some crumby things, we do some good things, we hope the good things out weigh the crumby things, we die.
Infinite punishment for finite crimes is IMMORAL
Condemning your children to infinite punishment for not loving you is IMMORAL
You don't choose hell, I choose right now not to go, You're sent there. You're sent there on the whim of a God that murdered the fird born children of an entire nation, a God that killed every man, woman and child on earth, Twice? A God who say 'slay the heathens around you, kill the male children, but keep the female children for yoursleves'
Your God is Fictional, nonsensical and Immoral.
Salvation works this way because we are all data that must be processed in order to be SAVED or Backup Up if you will we must come in contact with the source.
>>752276772
the difference is that you had no way of communicating with all of them, no communication whatsoever. use your brain.
>>752278603
you reject Christ, if you reject Christ you accept hell, there's no other place to go, you go to hell by your own, you have the cure, Christ blood, you dont want it
you think killing degenerates sinners is bad? you are a degenerate
if you think not doing what God command is moral, you are a degenerate
if you want to judge God, if you think you know anything more than him you arent worth saving, you are like the worst vermin, and people like you wont get save, but by your own hubris, not that God doesnt offer you salvation
>>752264931
>that uniform
>straight
I got news for you, anon
>>752270694
Fuck I hate lame DLC's
>>752260419
you have 3 options, there is no god (good evidence by statistics, there is inherent intent in nature, its not random fuckwits)
There is a god/more than one, but he is weak as fuck, unable to hold back evil god,lucifer etc
There is an all powerful god, but he is too busy, lazy, or intends for you to suffer.
now one of these answers is the absolute truth. The jury's is still out, since people are undecided about this.
A true religion will reflect harsh reality of life, not some imaginary tale where everything is ok.
Christianity is full with many priest promising good things, which is dishonest, life is fucked up.
If you believe, life is great, ask the little babies getting molested by paedos in every society(paedos are universal)
>>752270647
>how bout dat
>Actually howbow dah
>>752265459
>Forever
Yeah, neither of those cities are around anymore. Sounds legit.
>>752271807
I believe that's called "empathy".
I don't have to have my fingernails pulled out to imagine that it hurts.
>>752270309
lol just as true for a list of God's righteous deeds
>>752279781
>tfw God allow the sun to go up just to faggots like this have an opportunity to bad talk him
we need another fucking flood
>>752268502
What if I told you Christians are the most charitable group of people in the United States?
>>752271938
read Acts and Galatians you dolt, Christianity shunned the Judaizers a long time ago. Islam is the modern example of a literal application of the Abrahamic law.
>>752273816
typical Jew
>>752279285
>If God exists he's lazy, uncaring, cruel, weak etc.
You're acting like God owes you something and as if He's somehow bound by your moral code.
>>752270876
>the father, sacrificed the son, to the holy ghost; because rib woman ate an apple.
Seems legit.
>>752277593
>believes the moon landing was a hoax
>believes there's a guy siting on a cloud writing everything down to hold against you later
>believes the hundreds of thousands of people whod have to be in on a huge conspiracy could keep their mouths shut, oh and they work for the government
>mfw https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o8dKczJj3ks
>>752281641
paedos fucking kids is pretty shitty, anyone how can prevent this but allows it is also pretty shitty.
Its harsh reality. Any religion that says otherwise is dishonest.
That's all i've said. nothing about what's moral or not
>>752270694
wow cant believe you guys don't read your own shit. cmon everyone knows that the laws for the jews have not been overturned, jesus said himself that he did not come to overturn / blot out the law but to fulfill it. jews always have the choice to either follow the old or new laws, gentiles do not.
>>752281641
Are you gay and retarded? "God" hands humanity a moral code, then proceeds to violate it himself in every way possible. According the fictitious bible you cling to god loves humanity, therefore his utter fsil use to protect and care for his creation shows either god is not real, or he is a massive pile of shit
+1 to image limit
>>752283138
the problem is that you are a little faggot that want an easy life and fight for nothing, if you think a cold is God's wrath you are a baby
>>752283301
God doesn't exist. I forge my own moral code and my own life. I don't need my hand held as you seem to enjoy.
>>752283661
how do you know he doesnt?
>>752280706
you mean when joel osteen opened up his mega-church to all of the displaced victims of hurricane harvey?
>>752283661
man i know that God exist, that's why i follow him, you are the one that dont know if he doesnt exist, your moral code sucks
>>752282655
>Pedos are immoral
Without a God to provide a universal code of ethics, who are you to say what is and isn't moral? You don't get your morals from nature and science does not tell what things ought to be, it only tells what it is.
>>752283927
And how do you know he does?
>>752284011
fucking kids sounds pretty bad to me. it doesnt take a magic sky man to realize that
>>752283927
>believing the hood or evil you do is on you
>moral code that sucis
>>752284011
Arent we butthurt
Codes of ethic and law were created so that we dont get murdered by each other
>>752284022
it's fucking obvious! JUST WATCH LIFE WHAT'S HAPPENING what the Bible says, it's just right there!
i cant make you believe, you have to believe by your own
>>752283138
Why does God owe you anything? He could have made you a slave programmed to serve Him, but he instead gave you the freedom to turn away. Do you really not consider love freely given worth more than it being forced?
>>752284086
>>752284361
You still haven't said how you know it's a bad thing. You can't say your view that pedophilia is universally immoral without appealing to a transcendent being.
