Do you remember how it feels to be happy?
>>751961398
Nope. Might as well kys
Yeah but too many people died
so
I'm only happy once every three or four years. Yeah i remember. Happiness is s fleeting.
those are raspberries you nigger
>>751961554
You mean kms, right?
I really don't OP. I really, really don't.
Do you ever get that momentary glimpse of joy, that you feel in the pit of your stomach..... but it dies out oh so fast, and doesn't return.
I have memories, but the feeling I can not recall
>>751961949
Kek sure anon...
For real though. Does anyone else get that fleeting feeling of joy, that just appears and disappears for no reason?
no
Well fuck. That's depressing as shit. I'm ready to off myself and apparently the once in a year glimpse of joy is more than you poor fuckers feel.... I'm truly sorry.
those are fucking raspberries retard
>>751961398
>filename
those are raspberries
fucking idiot.
>>751961398
lost it years years ago.
I don't even enjoy fapping anymore.
yes, when i leave to go to physical therapy or to my personal trainer.
when i got home from rehab place i got into a car accident, not rehab like drug place.
The same as what it felt like to be stupid.
>>751962830
it's depression, the black cloud which is constantly stalking you wherever you are. I guess?
no.
>>751963777
wasted trips
OP.... why do you think you lost it? Drugs, drinking, just straight up depression? Do you have social anxiety?
I had to delete facebook years ago because watching people happy and bragging about their perfect lives was starting to affect me. Facebook has probably killed more people than AIDS.
I miss being 18 without any responsibility
>>751963828
wasted life
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0v9ITi6T42Q
>>751964013
∧,,∧
(´・ω・)
⊂ノ ニつ
(`(´ ノ
|| ﾉ
(_(＿)
>>751963926
Dear Anon, look it's just the highlights they're posting not the daily high life they constantly live in.
>>751963890
In my case a sum of life experiences and disappointments. The reason I don't kill myself is to not break my mothers heart.
>>751963939
Same here, now every time there is a problem I have to fix it, I think about leaving every day.
>>751963926
Only post I can relate to - and not because I'm miserable like the rest of you sick fucks.
Facebook is like "Look at Meee" central. Ugh. I used to play the game, but finally got off the merry-go-round.
And you're still a bunch of sick fucks. Now kys.
>>751961398
Yes. It was a long time ago, but I think I can get it back. It's going to be rough, at least for the first twelve weeks, but I think I can do it. All I have to do is find the right door in Afghanistan and blast it to splinters. It might take me a few times, but there's plenty of doors out there.
Oh shit... that hit home. Thanks Anon.... first time anyone else besides me thought it was depression. Everyone else seems to think I'm just being a bitch. Thanks Anon. Not sure how or how much yet, but that black cloud of depression statement helped a lot
>>751961398
I don't remember how it feels to feel.
>>751964091
I feel you bro. but killing yourself shouldn't be an opinion at all though. Try to move away, travel, knowing new people, new perspectives. You got the picture?
>>751964145
Yeah I have to FIGHT to get my elementary rights too. But I'm a fighter.
>>751961398
No. My wife kicked me out because I was an alcohol and it was ruining my family. No really though, it was ruining our relationship. I sobered up, lost a bunch of weight, got my finances together, started being Wonder-Dad (I was a good father before this happened, but improved). No fucking dice, she plays these fucking games with me telling me she misses me then when I try to talk to her about it she tells me I misunderstood her and she wants a divorce. Really starting to fucking hate her, it's killing me inside but we've been married over twelve years, have two kids and I would do anything to salvage the relationship.
>>751961398
Happiness is weakness, fuck happiness.
We are in a time where ww3 or civil war may break out. You will never be happy, you will either die or watch your friends or family die in the coming years.
If you survive, your definition of "happiness" will change from IPods and Xbox to I have food and I'm not getting shot at.
Fuck you if you doubt me and keep your head in the sand. Nothing would make me more happy!
>>751964381
Black cloud is my words. I hope you're not being sarcastic here.
But yes it's a cloud I try to escape from sometimes it works sometimes it's stronger than me.
>>751964391
Killing yourself is always an option if the individual considers it to be over. You have no right to impose your morality on someone else. I think the world would be better off without moralfags.
>>751964394
> an alcohol
i remember it, from when I was 16 and managed to buy some beer every friday night just before the off license closed, those days felt endless as we repeated the cycle of school, buy fags on thursday, go to the youth club on friday, hang out with the workers there (one of them happened to be a member of one of my favourite bands and a friend of my sister), youth club closed at 10, run down to off license, maybe get served, feel that rush of excitement if we did, hide somewhere in the town (the abandoned racetrack was a favourite) drinking quickly so we didnt get caught with booze, walk about the town joking and chatting with eachother enjoying being alive as we stared out at the lights from the boats on the water, walk home in the dark after the drink wore off and the smell of fags faded, arrive home at 5am sneak up to my room and act like i was home for hours, back to school on monday. As we all individually turned 18 and moved towards our final exams we drifted apart; one dropped out and is now in the psychiatric hospital where I also spent a while over S.t patricks day (god st patricks day was our glory day, we drank more than even my doctors thought possible and we had the best fun), the other hung out with the cool lads instead and has now moved away to college and I, I took to drinking massive amounts all the time (even during school lunch breaks) and smoking 40 a day (instead of the 4 or 5 we all shared on those magical friday nights). I was on several antidepressants and valium within 2 months and seeing a therapist weekly.
I still feel happy every time I see my sister who moved away when I was 7: about once a year. I imagine that's how my dog feels every time I come home from work
>>751964702
Not your blog, faggot.
>>751964566
what dumb motherfucker made this image
it's like saying "we're not gonna ban guns because banning guns ensures nobody gets shot!"
Tell me more OP. What life experiences and disappointments?
I identify with your reasoning. My parents and wife could give s shit if I offed myself. My three kids would be destroyed..... Feels like I'm bring held hostage with no choices. Half could care less, half think I'm a god (for now at least)...
>>751964758
>>751964669
Not trying anything. But killing yourself is a way to radical "way" to "solve" things.
Life means paths you choose, decisions you take.
>>751961398
Yes, MDMA generally helps.
>>751963926
>had to delete facebook years ago because watching people happy and bragging about their perfect lives
exactly the reason I deleted mine
Hell no... not being an ass with the "black cloud" comment. I'm serious. You hit it on the fucking head. No one has probably ever cared enough in the past to acknowledge my depression. Thank you
No. I was too quiet and shy in high school and college so I didn't make any friends and never had a girlfriend. Now that I'm out of college I don't even know how I can meet a girl. I'm so lonely and bored all the time.
>>751965146
we're all sad that you're in a black cloud just like we are, you miserable faggot.
Anons take it as an brotherly advice, please try to always stay positive and eliminate the suicidal thoughts from your dictionary.
Don't take negative things rule you or take it too serious.
Quite severely, yeah.
It was brief, very brief, but for once in my long, arduous, miserable fucking life I was genuinely fucking happy, and a permanent, stable kind of happy too, something unlike the rush from drugs or pleasant conversation.
A genuine, wholesome happiness that infected every last vestige of my life.
Then Hell struck, and it was all stripped away from me.
>>751961398
I was a depressed and a lonely shut-in for most of my 20s until I met my soulmate. She's a neurotic, emotional mess like me and we take care of each other. We motivate each other and cheer each other on, and I didn't realize how lonely I was until she entered my world. We got off drugs together and got our shit together. Some days are still hard, and happiness usually wins out only when the daily stressed are pushed out of mind, but this past year has been the happiest I've been since I was a teen. The anxious unease and worry about the future is quiet now. I started working out again and enrolled for my masters. And I now starve to live the life I've been denying myself.
I've gone to sleep so many nights comforting myself with thoughts about how if things ever got worse, I could always just kill myself and find eternal peace. Hang in there /b/ros, I love you bitter, lonely wounded animals from the deepest part off my heart. Open your hearts and make your own happiness.
>>751961398
Vaguely
I'm glad that there's still some cool anons on /b/ Who're not afraid telling their experience.
>>751964702
Pic taken on one of those nights
Once. I knew a girl. have you ever been able to be yourself? Have you ever been able to speak your thoughts truly to someone who understood you? I have. I loved her in the way that man can honestly love one woman in his life. I was the first boyfriend she ever had. it was the purest love I will never experience in my whole existence. it was naive and real like nobody who has ever been hurt before can feel again. Two years ago she died in a pointless accident. There will never be anyone I can ever talk to freely again, Nobody I can share my self with again. Really, she was the worst first love I could have had. There's no moving on now. I may as well be dead already, but I hope the best for you all. Nothing this horrible should happen to anyone. Especially someone as incredible as her.
>>751965774
I'm sorry anon, got a pic?
>>751961398
remember how it feels? yes.
Can I force it to feel that way rn? no.
I've never had any experiences or happy memories. I've just sat there my entire life until this point and missed out on all the opportunities you have.
>>751961398
No I'm dead inside l. The only reason I don't off my self is because of religious convictions.
>>751961398
I was happy when hitting niggers with sticks was socially acceptable when they were out of line.
the universe is like a prison no one can escape, whether happy or sad, confinement is always present, just accept it and try to do something constructive
>>751961398
I know I was, once.
All other happiness is hollow in comparison.
>>751964691
You must be new here.
>>751965908
She'd hate if I were to post her on 4chan. She was tall, and blonde, and she had eyes like an icy ocean storm. Every time I'd try to describe her beauty she would jokingly call me a faggot, I miss that more than I can describe, as weird as that sounds,
>>751961398
Happiness is weakness tbh. I will probably never be happy again. Good riddance
>>751966213
Christ that fucking hurts.
>>751965573
>no one could ever love you romantically
>>751966213
Move on.
>>751961398
Every time I masturbate, yea....
>>751966211
I was trying to get it started again.
Moments of happiness are few here in this thread.
>>751966213
I'm in upstate ny, let's grab a beer and get stoned
>>751966316
I just hope she's never forgotten. That's all that keeps me going. She should never be forgotten.
>>751966374
Oh very good, so was I. Carry on.
>>751966398
Western MT. Maybe someday friend.
>>751966192
I broke my own reality. I can still feel happy, but not without that existential dread that comes from being unable to exist with someone as special as she was.
>>751966213
Move the fuck on, jesus christ......
>>751964087
Im not anon but where the fuck are our highlights?
>>751966522
Unless she ate out your ass and made you waffles every morning I don't see what is so special about her.
>>751966213
:( Anon it's going to be okay. It might not feel like it ever will be, but it's going to be okay. I promise.
>>751966340
To what? Have you ever been with someone you could be your unashamed honest self with? Someone you could share anything with? . Nobody can compete, even with the memory. I've tried many times. I don't feel anything for any woman anymore. I wanted to get married, I wanted to have children. But I'm dead. I've dated since. I've had relationships with beautiful women, It doesn't mean anything. I wish it did, but I can't make it.
Yesterday at thanksgiving i saw all the family i care about. I remember looking at their faces and hearing their laughs wondering what it'll be like after i kms. They care and to their knowledge im doing completely fine mentally and academically. Wish i was gook so i could just off myself and they'd understand that i was a failure
>>751966716
nothing could have made her more special, and I wouldn't want my ass eaten
>>751966671
more or less highlights.
I'm sure you have seen some highlights too bro. Don get me wrong anon, I'm stalked by the black guy
cloud too but I give my best to see the sun every day.
>>751961398
yes but i haven't been really, truly, stupidly happy since age 24, im 30 now
>>751966875
In a way I know how this anon feels. The hardest part is that you will never get closure since you will never see her again. That is what hurts the most.
>>751966922
I hope you don't wonder why she left your pathetic ass.
Cry me a fucking river then build a bridge and get over it.
>>751966875
You're being a melodramatic cunt.
If you actually respected her you'd stop being such a selfish cunt and live a life she'd be happy to see.
Every moment you sit there and cry like a little bitch is another wallowing piss stain on her memory you fucking chud.
>>751967087
I know why she left me: I was unable to have been the version of myself that could be with her.
>I can't let go: I can't move on; as able as I am becoming, I can't change the past.
>>751967087
Hope he does cry a river and build a bridge.
I'll walk over that bridge, straight to your house and fuck your girlfriend.
>>751967331
Lol, like I'd have a girlfriend.
You can always fuck my hand for a bit, that would probably be pretty hot.
>>751961398
feel what now?
>>751961398
I AM happy, you retard
>>751962025
I bet a mouthful of sperm would cheer you right up
>>751967279
I tried that, being the sort of person she wanted me to be. I've worked hard, and I've gotten my degree, and I've done my best. I've dated, and I've tried to love. There's nothing there. There's nothing left even though I dig and dig for something. I want to love again. I want the pain to stop. There's nothing there. I don't know what to do anymore anon. I really hope you have some answers for me. I've spent every night for over two years searching for one, and I have nothing,
>EVERYTHING SUCKS, I'LL NEVER HAVE A PERFECT GIRLFRIEND, THERE IS NO COMPARABLE OUTSIDE MOTIVATION TO WHAT I'VE LOST
>>751967663
Then just fucking kill yourself.
You're obviously fucking worthless.
Seriously, if that is how you feel then what the fuck is holding you back from suicide?
>>751967663
What did you get your degree in?
>>751961398
nah
I'm completely anhedonic and apathetic
The only reason I don't kys is that I'm planning to do something that might make me feel normal again then I can kys
>>751961398
my existence is an interminable maelstrom of torment the likes of which you faggots could not imagine in your worst nightmares.
Yes, I was happy once. Chasing it again is what drives me to alcoholism. It's taken me longer, and seems far more futile. I'll probably never meet a woman again that fulfills me as the "one" did.
>>751967729
>I CAN'T IMAGINE LIVING FOR ANYONE ELSE LONG ENOUGH TO LIVE FOR THEM FULLY
>I COULD HAVE BEEN ABLE TO LIVE FOR EVERYONE ELSE, FULLY, AND HER ABOVE ALL
>>751967740
Not much. I'm all my parents have, I have memories of her that nobody else have. I just keep on doing what I have to somehow. It's the kind of person she was. You know she woke up at 3 AM on the weekend in -30 F weather to shovel sidewalks to pay for college? I can't quit. I owe it to her too keep going.
>>751967787
Mech eng
>>751967995
If you owe her so much then quit bitching about it so much.
Fucking A, get a fucking therapist or something instead of crying on the internet about how dead you are inside like a fucking autistic 12 year old.
>>751968105
What will a therapist tell me that 4chan won't? I like that you're honest. I want the raw real opinion. I like that you tell me what you really think. But anon, you don't understand. I could go to a therapist, hear some bullshit, and accomplish the same thing I do here. But at least you'e honest.
>>751968105
I'm not the guy you're replying to, but, I'm sick of the dumbass bullshit bravado you guys have. Shit happens, it hurts, The guy will stop dwelling in it when he's ready. I mean shit, I was with a bitch over four years ago and that shit still haunts me from time to time, because it was an awesome relationship.
everything else in life is trivial. I can't make it nontrivial; I never realized that she was the only one who did that until it was too late.
>>751968377
Are you wallowing in autistic depression and crying online about how dead inside you are and how nothing will bring joy to your life?
Or do you suck it up, go into work, and act like fucking adult?
>>751968351
A therapist would help you cope with a variety of behavioral conditioning and would refer you to psychiatrist if drugs will make you act more normal.
Depression is a fucking chemical state in your brain, they have pills that can fix that shit for most people.
Then, after therapy, and maybe some good drugs, you can see how much of a cunt you're being about this.
You should be ashamed, that shame should drive you to be better, if you're staying the same but still feel shame you're being a cunt.
>>751968567
Different person. I'll go to work. I'll keep doing my best until I die. It doesn't mean anything though. You don;t know what it means to truly love someone, that can never be replaced. There is no bandaid for this.
"because it was an awesome relationship"
amen stranger, but damn is it hard to remember sometimes
>>751968567
I'm four years removed. This guy's dealing with this shit now. It doesn't really matter. "suck it up" isn't a good reaction to someone reeling from a traumatic experience.
>>751961398
Now that I think about it, no. I'm a 27 year old veteran, alcoholic, pothead, loser, who has been in only fucked up relationships. What the hell am I still doing here?
>>751964566
Retarded image. Not so retarded post.
>>751968834
Getting a feel for what happiness can be, so that you can seek it yourself and feel the feels that come with it.
>>751968707
Two years of constant depression? I wish it were so easy.
>>751968377
I hated my job and my life. I was fucking depressed and an alcoholic. I was so fucking pathetic I planned out my suicide, had everything prepped, and then chickened out like a pussy at the last moment.
Then I got mad, first at everything around me, then at myself. I was ashamed of my behavior, ashamed of what I had let myself become.
So I got over it. I quit my job, I quit drinking, and I literally just got over it.
No more entertaining suicide thoughts, no more entertaining self-loathing.
I fucking moved on.
Its not fucking bravado you cunt. I'm not saying it is fucking easy, I'm just saying its something you have to do.
When you have to do something, it doesn't matter how hard it is to do it, you HAVE to do it. So buckle down and get to it.
If you are unwilling to do it then you shouldn't chicken out of offing yourself.
>You gave up a star-crossed lover.
That burned into memory, and it hurts worse seeing it fade it nothingness, knowing there's little else afterwards.
No amount of writing, thinking, or activity will ever bring back what I had.
Kinda funny, you go through life seeing all these fucked up stories a little grateful that you're not a part of them.
Well, look at you now.
>>751969025
No one said it was easy, just that you're making it out to be some insurmountable thing.
It isn't.
>>751968707
Drugs are for those that either have tried to shake it, and really, really, can't. or those that haven't tried. Fuck using drugs for this kind of thing.
>>751968745
>Two years ago
Pretty sure reeling cuts off after the first few weeks, or months if we're being generous.
This dude lost his chick two years ago, its time to stop wallowing in self-pity and suck it up.
>>751969098
No, I get it, I've been through every phase of it, I've worked out, I've done it. But it is a process, and it has to suck for a while. You can't just start working out and making shit better, and your mind state is going to fix itself automatically.
>>751969213
It's not chemical for two years, What would you have me do? Get married, have strong smart children? What do you know of love anon? Where's the woman you will spend the next 60 years with?
>>751969413
>Pretty sure reeling cuts off after the first few weeks, or months if we're being generous.
You know nothing boy. Nothing at all.
>>751969223
Thus the first thing to do that I stated being a therapist, which will recommend therapy and behavioral exercises first.
I never said use drugs first you autistic cunt. They are a legitimate option over the course of treatment, stop being a fucking retard.
>>751969479
.....Uh, yes it can be.
Its called a chemical imbalance you uneducated fuck.
I repent of literally everything. I am sorry for everything I did, and everyone I was. I am sorry for who I am, and for continuously being unable to exist as the perfect-enough version of myself. I want to change who I am; if I were different, it would be for the better; I wish to be able to.
>>751969655
It's cute you think you understand. You have no idea. I hope you never do.
>>751961398
No. No not really
>>751969542
When my mother died I was lucky enough to get 3 days of bereavement for the funeral and prep.
I worked overtime the entire rest of the week. I had to keep a professional face up the entire time and process my grief in private during the few hours a day I was free from work or sleep.
You can suck my "boy" dick, cunt.
>>751968999
Idk anon. Everything has just felt so bland. Really seems like I've been tricking myself into thinking I had something to live for by just living in the moment (hanging out with friends, parties, relationships) But I think I have been lying to myself this whole time.
>>751961398
fuck you
>>751961398
I only feel anything when I'm sad. I actively try to get sad over small things so I can feel something. Anything. My entire social life has been irreversibly crippled because I'm a 4/10. I'll never be happy like how all the beatiful people are. Life is in black and white and always will be.
>>751969796
You're fucking retarded.
You are fucking clueless.
You aren't fucking special, your case isn't special, nothing about you or her was fucking special.
Thousands of people suffer a loss equal to or greater than yours DAILY.
The difference between you and most of them is that the majority of them move the fuck on.
They aren't autistic fucking cunts crying on the net about how sad they are, they actually go to a productive place or seek actual help.
Fuck off so fucking much you entitled fucking cunt.
>>751961398
No. No, I don't.
Right now, I'd settle for content.
I really, really hate existing. I love existence, and everything, and everyone, and sometimes they make it bearable and even enjoyable. They can never make my hatred of having to exist go away; no one else can: I can't imagine anyone else as able. If I could change who I was, maybe I could change my mind too. I wish to change myself.
>>751966213
>eyes like an icy ocean storm
>>751969894
I had none. I went to class two days later. I went to the place she died the day after. I went to her house and talked to her family and almost lost consciousness from hyperventilation. Don't pretend this is the same thing. Everyone loses their mother. this is not a normal thing to go through. I'm, sorry for what you've been through but I'll go through it eventually. We all will if we don't die first.
>>751970259
You and me are in the same boat my friend.
>>751967740
you're scaring the children!
>>751970074
Who the fuck are you? What do you know?
Things are actually ok right now
If you are depressed medication can help a lot of people
I remember drunk. Is that close?
>>751970259
I wish to change myself: my physical appearance, bone structure, cell tissue, internal organs, vascular structure, skin generation, and brain matter. I imagine how, exactly, I would change myself. I wish to become more able, in order to.
>>751970074
go back to rebbit
>>751970321
It is losing a loved one, period.
Just because everyone's mother dies, usually before they die, doesn't make it have less of an impact.
Stop being autistic.
This crying bitch lost their GF in an accident TWO YEARS AGO and is still crying on 4chan about it.
If they were incapable of dealing with it themselves in two years they had TWO FUCKING YEARS to get help already.
They haven't.
They are fucking worthless.
>>751970330
this boat is too fucking big to ever find someone as perfect again
>>751970432
What do I know?
More than you apparently.
>>751970576
You're meme is almost as retarded as you are....
>>751970627
You know nothing child. I don't cry about my brother's death. You have never lost a lover like this. You have never loved anyone or had them love you. Don't pretend you understand me.
i dont remember
>>751970801
>calls me a child
>says they don't cry about their brother's death
>Implies I've never lost
>Thinks no one could understand them
Fuck you're autistic
I'm honestly going to kill myself at the end of this year if I haven't changed myself enough by then.
>>751970661
Yeah I know that feeling. That's why I smoke and drink constantly, to literally forget.
>>751970939
To many vaccinations. Stop replying boy.
>>751970964
Save up some money to take care of your arrangements after you go.
Do it in a way so no one has to stumble upon your corpse. Like, call it in or something once you're sure you're about to be finished and dead before any help arrives.
Don't be a total dick about it.
>>751971031
Too many tears
Stop crying bitch
>>751965774
Sorry that happened to you. I fear this everyday. I sincerely hope things get better for you
I wish I could tell people I know that I'm not happy without sounding like an absolute faggot. I deserve to be happy like everyone else but it will just never come.
I want a fulfilling social life. I have lots of good qualities about my personality, more than being your steriotypical "nice guy" fucking loser. But just because I'm slightly below average looking all I attract are toxic, insufferable people I'm forced to call "friends." The social anxiety doesn't help things either. No one I've ever talked to understands what it's like, to be fucked over, to be absolutely unloveable.
I've been on antidepressants for years now but that won't ever change the fact that I'll never have a woman that I can hold in my arms and love unconditionally. Fuck, that's all I really want. Someone who I love and they understand me. No one cares enough to ask what I want though. I want to be happy but it's out of my hands. And I can't think of anything more sad and fucking pathetic than that.
>>751970985
My reality broke. I smoke, and drink, and do drugs to focus by leaving behind the necessity to constantly forget.
>>751970985
I would swear we were the same person if it wasn't for the fact that we were here talking.
>>751971231
>No one I've ever talked to understands what it's like, to be fucked over, to be absolutely unlovable.
Pedophiles, prisons have visiting hours.
You could probably chat to one and gain some perspective.
>>751971231
Shut the fuck up and me a man. Learn how to talk to women from youtube if you have to. You attract toxic women because you put off a desperate vibe. But you're good looking enough to have a real life. Work quick before you;re old and slow. You'll look just like your father before you know it.
>>751971374
I would swear we were the same person if it wasn't for the fact that we were here talking.
>>751971158
I wouldn't, but by suggesting that, you must realize that you are being a dick, and should not question other people's morality until you have fully questioned and resolved your own.
>>751963926
I did this too and I regret it, I had like 500 friends before I became a drug using shutin for years
>>751971495
We're not here... we're somewhere else, and still nothing matters because we're probably not even who the other is looking for; let alone that there's even a connection
>>751971498
I never implied I wasn't a dick.
I never said don't be a dick.
I said don't be a 'total dick'.
Killing yourself is already a dick move to anyone associated with you, you can't even consider suicide without accepting the dickish qualities of it.
I actively planned my own suicide at a low point in my life, then I got over it.
I have resolved my morality.
If you actually go through with killing yourself, take the time to plan ahead so you aren't a total dick about it. You'll be gone but the rest of us will still be here and have to deal with that shit.
I do, that's what really makes it hurt now that that false feeling is gone.
>>751971722
I'm just saying, It's good to find someone who literally thinks the same thoughts I run from all the time. It's just good to know that you aren't "completely" alone
>>751961398
yeah, and that's why I can't ever be.
>>751971767
you shouldn't assume that it is best for anyone, including you, to die. Such an assumption is a total-dick move.
It's funny isn't it? None of us will remember this thread. We;ll be on out deathbead before we believe it. If we're lucky we;ll be surrounded by our families. if now we'll be alone in a hospital bed, or we won't be ambulatory because of obesity. But we'll all die sooner than later, I won;t even remember any of you. You won't remember me. And we'll die like every other person in the history of our species. Afraid and alone.
>>751972049
Every person has the inborn right to decide when to get off this ride.
>>751971858
Thank you for saying so. I wish that you find someone perfect, so you're not also completely alone; I can't not be.
>>751972182
yeah, but the best sort of world is the one where everyone is in it, happy.
>>751972273
Ideals are something to strive for, not expect.
Some people in this world can't cope and want out, and it is the height of hubris to tell them they HAVE to stay.
You can request they stay, you can offer help, you can do a lot, but if they still decide to leave you have to let them go.
>>751971477
>>751971767
>>751972182
take your autism pills
>>751961398
I haven't felt happiness for about 4 years.
>>751972481
You first
>>751961398
What's a feels? What's a happy?
>>751972433
fair enough. I'll admit that for some people, and possibly myself, it could not be enough
>>751961398
yes at the moment i dump a nut in a whore
>happiness is fleeting
>>751972273
Replying just in case. Thanks, buddy.
>>751971207
If you were dying, who do you want to be with? Who's eyes are the last you want to look into before you slip away forever? I know without uncertainty who I would want. The person who who would comfort me in my last terrified seconds. I wasn't there for her. She died in the dark on a rural road. I can never repay that debt. I go over it again and again, in my head. What it was like to die like that. Some day I'll die too. And I'm separated from this place. Nobody will ever hold my hand and comfort me like she could. I'll die like she did. Alone, in the dark. I'm sorry for your mother. I haven't lost mine yet. I know it's coming. I'm tired of this tragic life. I can't bear to rise again anymore. It's too much. I've done it too many times. I was always sad, and I have nothing left to give.
pls rember that wen u feel scare or frigten
never forget ttimes wen u feeled happy
wen day is dark alway rember happy day
>>751961398
I remember how remembering it feels like; if that makes any sense. I remember remembering love. I remember remembering happy times with my friends and loved ones. Even as of late, I've been fortunate enough to have a bunch of friends invite me out constantly and want to spend time with me. I often try to engage with them but end up hating how I am spending my time and stay reclused at these parties. I used to smile. Now all I do is drink and sometimes smile at something shitty and relatable. Pic related, me passed out drinking.
>>751972879
Anon, there was nothing you could've done. I think you're blaming yourself. I get that you miss her and that's normal, but if you really convince yourself there's nothing you could've done and that you can't change the past, you might start to feel better, forget. It'll be a tough pill to swallow, no doubt, but this is where you should start.
>>751961398
it's not being hung up on this hopeless constructed fantasy of eating strawberries
>>751961398
Happiness is for children. The expectation and pursuit of happiness as an adult is childish.
>>751961398
>gf, someone I considered my best friend, S/O told me she's no longer in love with me.
>little to no passion in my craft
>hobbies like vidya and capeshit don't give me much enjoyment
>every person I once considered a friend just put on a friendly face act
>always too busy to hang
>petty complaints and drama everywhere
>everybody's toxic and shits behind each other
>feels like I'm going insane for the first time in my life
>suicidal every two weeks
I honestly don't remember, but goddamnit I'm fucking trying my best not to be a cynical nihilist.
Seriously all memes aside, what do you anons think about Jordan Peterson? I'm too broke to afford therapy so I started listening to his videos and it's actually been helping me get back on my feet.
I'm down to listen to other anons tonight.
>>751961398
Would any of us be here if we did?
bump
I member. Im looking forward to the next time actually.
happiness is just side effects of mixed chemicals of the brain, if you find something important in life happiness comes with it.
>>751972273
Please. I'm begging for a good day.
>>751972273
>Reply to this post to have a great day
There's no external power out there to make you have a great day man.
I'm starting to learn that shit comes from within.
>>751972273
Niga niga niga niga niga niga niga im one hundred percent niga
>>751978957
Nigga nigaa nigga nigaa nigga nigga nigaa. Im two hundred percent nigga
>>751979733
poor superman
>>751978957
niga niga niga niga iam two hundred percent nigga
>>751964691
>lurk moar
