ITT: We describe movies badly and others guess what they are.
1.
>"Ugh, it's warm even! You don't even care, do you?"
>"Forget it, I'm not drinking it."
>"About yourself, you dumb FUUCCKK!"
>Also John "Neo the One" Wick features prominently.
2.
>Faggot gets buttfucked as a kid
>Doesn't necessarily enjoy it
>Develops amazing sense of humor later on
>Haggard Mugshot.jpg
3.
>Depressed loser wants girl
>Meets other girl
>JUST FUCK MY SOUL UP.jpg
>Doesn't get either girl
>Gets third girl
>Film predates iconic alimony payments of doomed actor/photographer.
4.
>A sickly young Jew is deeply repulsed by the thought of healthy, attractive Aryans finding true love
>Cheetos product placement in background
>Jew boy's relative also played by Jew who later suffered dementia irl.
>robots are people
>people are robots
>>750915702
1.
> There is a cock and it's being sucked,.
>>750916587
Caligula
or
The Brown Bunny
>Forest Gump gets AIDS
>Dies
>Also, there's a nigger
>The End
Lots of guys die.
One guy survives.
He does stuff.
The end.
4 brothers fight a man with knives.
>>750918701
I Am Legend
>>750918861
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
>>750917481
Great, I'll give you another one... and give answer to every point please and it's combination
1. Man is running out of prison.
2. It's winter outthere.
3. Man is going home...
also combos of 123 12 13 23 counts.
>Hero of the movie is really the bully
>The "villain" is really the hero, albeit a flawed hero
>Chopsticks and wax
>>750918968
Correct. I might have described that too well.
>>750915982
blade runner
>>750916587
your moms selfie videos
>>750918598
Philadelphia?
>>750918701
unbreakable
>>750919702
I'm looking for something on IMDB, I know she has stuff like that but... I'm not going to look at my mom, also there's got to be more blood on IMDB.
>>750919261
What was the first one? I'm assuming it was neither Caligula nor the Brown Bunny, though both of those movies feature actual blowjobs with graphic oral sex.
>give answer to every point please and it's combination
I'm bored, why not.
>1. Man is running out of prison.
>2. It's winter outthere.
>3. Man is going home...
1. The Running Man, Death Warrant, The Shawshank Redemption, Wishmaster II
2. North, The Polar Express, Iron Will, Frosty the Snowman, A Christmas Carol
3. Garden State, A History of Violence, Romeo Must Die
1&3: A Better Tomorrow
1&2: The Santa Clause
2&3: Jack Frost
There's a million others but eh, that's enough for now. Yes, I'm autistic for actually taking you up on this challenge. Or very bored.
>>750919411
>I might have described that too well.
Nah, I'm just good at this game. I don't want to brag but I get a lot of really tough ones and people say "Holy shit, I can't believe you got that!" I'm kind of a big deal.
A prince gets raised by gay hippies.
>>750919805
Correct.
>>750920209
I don't know. It was like 900 movies I saw, every one had the same context scene situation, timeline and everything. So I haven't came up with anything better. Or porn video is not a movie and I'm totally wrong.
>>750920896
The Lion King
A whole lot of "what the fuck is this shit"
But in the end polarities become one
>>750919350
Karate kid, as interpreted by Barney Stinson
>>750921123
Ghostbusters
>>750921210
The Dark Crystal
>>750921197
Correct.
>>750921506
Is that the answer or are you trying to guess at something and tagged the wrong post?
Don't give away answers after one guess (if you're the guy who posted the movie).
Stuff happens.
Guy gets girl.
>Pocahontas
Guy walks around in bath robe all movie.
>>750921794
Man in fire.
It's a horror movie.
>>750921952
The Big Lebowski
>>750921952
Hitchhikers guide to the galaxy
Dinosaurs attack, again.
>>750921952
The one with the dude
What's it called? Something with lebowsky?
It's set in New York city.
It's a movie about toys.
One man can't see, one can't hear.
>>750922268
Small soldiers
>>750922268
toy movie
Tom Hanks stars in it.
>>750922268
toy story?
>commercial towing vehicle
>go exploring
>have terrible accident
>man dies
>serial killer starts hunting them
Two wolves get shot in the ass with sleep darts and escape from canada to fuck eachother in the u.s.
Future man comes back to kill someone.
>>750922201
Escape from New York
A man reads his autobiography, and is shocked how similar it is to his life.
>>750922892
Terminator
>an abusive relationship is solved by a plant
A dog plays basketball.
Cars turn into robots.
>>750922502
do you have any sense of humor?
>>750923145
Air bud
Black man and racist come together in a snowstorm shoot out.
>>750923197
Transformers
>>750923145
god damned Air Bud
>>750923260
Django Unchained
Movie in a convenience store.
>>750923287
Clerks
>>750923284
So close but no cigar
>>750923287
clerks
College kids don't know the capital of Brazil and die because of it
BLack guy. Little girl. Mexicans.
WHat movie dis be?
>>750923260
Hateful 8
>>750923492
Ding ding ding ding! Correct!
>>750923260
Pulp fiction?
>>750923402
Hmm don't know. Guessin tourista(s)???
Psychotic men give an empire an explosive theatrical experience.
>>750923607
Okay now everyone is just fucking with me. Go ahead and guess Dusk Til Dawn next lol
This primer is now a copypasta I will paste into future threads when I see them.
***
For those of you failing to grasp the concept behind these threads:
A bad movie description is one that is literally true even if it is vague, hyperbolic or even playfully misleading. There is a difference between a bad description and one that is awful or simply inaccurate. One key distinction is that a properly worded bad description teases the reader's brain but only accurately describes one movie in particular. It's like a map that while puzzling to read, ultimately only leads to one location once deciphered. An awful description is vague to the point of describing dozens or even hundreds of movies while never pointing to any one in particular. Lastly, an inaccurate description is simply flat out lying about happened, effectively creating your own retarded version of the film that no one else watched.
Here is a bad description of American Psycho
>An up and coming investment banker dines in various trendy restaurants with colleagues
Here is an awful description
>A guy does some stuff with people. Also, some other guy does something.
Here is an inaccurate description
>A guy gets dumped by his girlfriend, then some other office clerk hall stabs someone. Also, lmao Russians!
See the difference?
I would like to give the people who do this credit for trolling but it seems more likely they are just fucking retarded.
>>750923402
I Know What You Did Last Summer
>>750915702
A man overthrows the government to save some pussy.
>>750924075
Donald Trump's presidency
>>750922268
Mean girls
>>750923631
Nope. It's a sequel to a well known slasher movie.
>>750922339
See No Evil, Hear No Evil
>>750922135
The Lost World
>>750918701
bagger vance
>>750923986
One missing word from being right
>>750923126
Little Shop of Horrors?
>>750923343
Hateful Eight? Haven't seen it, but you said Django was close.
>>750924287
I Still Know What You Did Last Summer
Never saw it, incidentally. I just remember Roger Ebert making fun of the movie for being so fucking stupid.
>>750924287
I'll Always Know What You Did Last Summer
>>750915702
>Guy goes to the movies
>2 dudes show up to kill him
>Fire
>>750922443
every movie ever fucking made?
Jason kills kids in their dreams.
>>750924530
Inglorious Basterds
>>750924530
Inglorious Bastards
It's a parody of horrors movies.
>>750924557
Freddie vs. Jason
>>750924629
Scary Movie
A movie adaption of a best selling book.
The adventures of 2 stoners friends.
>Guy fights monsters with a boomerang.
>>750924797
Harold and Kumar
or
Cheech and Chong
or
Bill and Ted
A sequel to the hit movie Die Hard.
>>750924797
dude where's my car
>Pacifist turkey hunter goes to war.
>>750924880
>Schwing!!
>>750924963
The Deer Hunter
>>750924797
Pineapple express
>>750923654
Inglorious basterds
that one crazy dude with the explosion things
>>750925021
Nope. Good try.
>>750924628
>>750924603
Correct
>>750925180
The expendables
it's a TV show but here it goes:
>3 buddies live in trailer park
>supervisor is a drunk
>one guy never wears a shirt
>they commit crimes to make money
>one of the 3 fixes shopping carts
>>750925292
What then fuck is Jeopardy?!
>>750924308
Yes
>>750925287
nah
>>750925335
definitely
>weird bookworm girl
>huge mansion
>brown Hank McCoy
>stockholm syndrome
>imprisoned 15 years
>get really angry
>smash fucks with hammer
>fuck own daughter
>realize what ive done
The bad guy was by dog's nephew all along
>Kid cries while his father beats up the air.
>>750915702
>kid gets abused by family
>moves to boarding school
>gets abused there
>bla bla bla
>happy ending everyone likes him
>>750925501
Beauty and the beast
>>750925501
The Haunting
>>750925534
Oldboy
>>750925584
Igby Goes Down
Robin Williams stars in it.
>>750925292
Trailer Park Buddys
Monkey plays baseball.
>>750925762
close but no cigar
>>750925697
No
More (hopefully not easy now):
>british
>>750925584
harry potter? kek
>>750925760
13 reasons?
>>750925849
Harry Potter?
No clue.
>>750925921
Yes
Stuff happens, but in space.
>>750925958
SUM KINDA FUCKED UP
Will Smith is the main character.
>>750925998
space jam
A car crash results in a man in the windshield.
>>750926030
...J-Jersey Girl?
A man in a phonebooth.
Woman loses memory
Woman gets memory back
Woman kills a bunch of dudes and saves a kid
>>750926192
dr. what
>dentist
>slave niggers
>more niggers
this ones easy:
>guys wife gets cancer
>feel-bad-man.jpg
>kills other guys cuz why not
>he dies
>detective guy likes him so he kills people too
>>750926209
Kill Bill?
>>750926321
Fuck i messed up, ignore the word wife
>>750926314
Django Unchained
>soap
Adam Sandler stars in it.
>>750926436
Saw
>>750926503
Happy Madison
Trans guy wants to make a woman morph suit
>>750926381
very similar but not correct.
I'll give you a hint
theres' a scene dedicated to a dog licking its asshole
>>750926503
Every comedy ever
>>750926509
Yea
>>750926565
Silence of the lambs
>>750926645
Yep
>stacy chooses chad instead of autismo
>chad fucks it all up with stacy
>stacy settles for autismo literal retard and become liberals
>also chad drives off a cliff, car explodes midair and later is in the hospital with minor wounds
Jim Varney
>>750915702
>poorfag neet confused with richfag cripple
>hilarity ensues
It's a Christmas movie.
>>750926942
home alone? a christmas story? surviving christmas?
>>750926458
Got it
Boy discoverers a native American in his furniture.
>>750926568
No idea
Two guys drive to Las Vegas.
>>750926891
TBL. Again.
>>750926942
Die hard.
>>750926891
do-over
>>750927102
fear and loathing las vegas?
Crazy scientist in a DeLorean.
>>750927102
Fear and loathing in Las Vegas
>>750927051
The Indian in the Cupboard
>>750927188
Back to the future
>>750927188
back to the future, easy
>>750927099
The Long Kiss Goodnight (sam jackson / gena davis)
Guys build time machine, they fuck shit up with alternate timelines and shit.
>>750927102
Can't think of name but its on Netflix and this fat dude wants to be a comedian but he ends up serial killing with a serial killer. Was I right?
>>750918701
Lone survivor
>>750927240
>>750927241
WRONG!
Back to the future 2.
>>750927051
Indian in the cupboard
>>750927302
hot tub time machine? back to the future?
>>750927364
Wrong, guess again.
>>750927302
Harold and Kumar
Poor bitch decides to stick her nose way into a power company doing dastardly deeds and becomes rich out of it.
>>750927454
Wrong.
(hint, they wear suits)
A tape that kills.
>>750927618
The Ring
Bunch of people can't think outside the box.
>>750927610
how to build a time machine?
>>750927784
Just fiddle around with boxes, a timer and some chemicals in a basement.
>>750927864
gotta have that flux capacitor
>>750927697
Cube
>Man relocates his business to a vehicle with his family
>>750927914
Yep
Ogiorional
>Henry from Goodfellas hangs out with the nigger from Lethal Weapon
>Also, there's some kid who talks to animals
>>750927302
Primer
>>750922790
No Country for Old Men
>>750926791
Is this an older movie or recent?
>>750927901
Has anyone found this mysterious time machine movie whith alternating timelines, confusing plot, and two dudes in white suits doing experiments with it?
Guy makes meth in an RV.
>>750928058
You won, good job.
>>750928068
No, but nice guess
>>750922268
50 shades of grey
Delinquent kids dig.
Beta uses french alter ego to achieve gf
>Hector has an anger management problem
>>750928272
Some shit with Michael Cera
>>750928272
True Lies
Probably not your movie but it fits.
>>750928000
lol u thought this was r9k
>>750922268
Is it that movie toys?
>>750928255
Holes
>>750928255
Holes
>>750928255
Holes
>>750928377
I'm the guy he responded to and so did I.
>John Wick plays Santa Claus
Some people ruin their lives with drugs and it's dramatic.
>>750922790
Duel? Or that one with Steve Zahn?
Jim Carrey is a shitty relationship partner until a series of unnatural occurrences make him see the error of his ways.
A teenage girl must choose between necrophilia and beastiality
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
or
The Grinch
>>750928677
Beauty and the Beast
>>750928651
Meant to respond to you with >>750928743
>>750928677
Twilight, kek
>>750915702
hugo weaving is consistently an asshole
>>750928812
Yep
>>750928624
Nope, keep guessing.
>>750928970
The matrix trilogy
>>750928970
The Matrix
What movie am I talking about:
Tom Hanks plays the good guy
>>750929343
many options, the most generic would be forrest gump
>>750929343
Pulp Fiction
>kids get off plane
>plane goes boom
>universe fucks the kids up
>>750915702
man reads diary and enters diary over and over again until he gives himself an abortion
>>750929483
The butterfly effect
>>750929404
Good guess anon. Heres a trickier one.
Michael Cera plays a socially awkward young adult
>michael Scott likes mice
>paul rudd is a douche
>friendship ensues
>>750928651
>Liar Liar
>Bruce Almighty
>The Mask
>Mr. Poppin's Penguins
>Me Myself and Irene
>How the Grinch stole Christmas
>Fun with Dick and Jane
>Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
>Yes Man
Pick one.
>>750929727
Dinner for Shmucks
>>750929985
Yes indeed
A man tries to find a toy for Christmas.
>>750922890
Wolvereen Orgians
>Foreign film
>A father accidentally fucks one of his children
>Then he gets revenge by killing his enemies
>Movie ends with his suicide
>Or does it?
>Film was very controversial at the time of its release
Man gets bit by spider.
>>750929164
>>750929200
sorry, no.
>>750930357
Jingle all the Way
>>750930956
Spiderman is the obvious choice but this is probably a trick question.
>Dwight Schrute loses wife
>goes nuts
>raped by Ellen Page
>Kevin Bacon says nigger
>lots of murder
A firey red-haired Jew kills 2 Canadian comedians.
>>750928970
Captain America
>inconceivable
>>750931933
The Princess Bride
>Nick Cage jumps off of a skyscraper
>sad puppy song
>iris
>girfriend dies
>>750932134
Yus
>>750932215
City of Angels
Any two of those four lines was sufficient, actually.
His world is just a tv show.
>>750932375
I was just going to do 1 and 4
Danny devito is a car salesman.
>>750932451
The Truman Show
How about some challenging movies, my dude? Pick something from 30 years ago.
>>750932622
Twins
>>750932622
Matilda
>Ayy lmao
>Niggers with guns
>Does this spic even speak English?
>Different than we may fantasize, the hovering vehicle won't stay in place forever. Tarry not, my fair maiden.
>>750918598
I just watched Philadelphia yesterday!
Tony Montana...
Clones want to prove they have souls so that they won't get killed. Prove they have souls. Get killed anyway.
>>750932801
Good movie. Did you spot the cameo by Roger Corman? Maybe I should start by asking if you even know who Roger Corman is, hmm.
>>750933089
Blade Runner
>>750926568
Long kiss goodnight
>Bald, ugly guy with one bad eye steals spacecraft
>Bases operation out of an active volcano bc why not
>Brit sent to kill him
>Brit has to literally become a Jap to that for some reason
>Gets his ninja friends to assault active volcano lair
>Fails to kill partially blind, fat bald guy (even with fucking 100 ninjas helping him)
>Oh well there's another one coming out maybe he'll get him next time
That movie that has lots of explosions and then that guy wearing that jacket dies.
Everyone has AIDS
>>750933452
Africa: The Movie
>>750933369
Austin Powers
A man and his dog...
>>750933530
OP, nope. But you're close.
Don't call me Shirley.
>>750933645
Goldmember? The Spy who Shagged Me?
I only saw the first.
>>750933685
Airplane
>>750933134
I did not know who that is. Looked him up. Still don't know what scene he would've been in. The caretaker at the cottage maybe?
>>750933685
Airplane
>>750933181
Nope
>>750933369
The 007 movies
4chan proginerator plays video games
A film adaption of the Mary Shelley story.
>>750934041
Young Frankenstein
>>750925501
>brown Hank McCoy
That is the best fucking bad description ever
On the hunt for a one armed one legged one eyed man.
>>750924075
v for vendetta
Outbreak
or
12 Monkeys
or
Some zombie movie with a zombie virus.
et cetera
Forgot to tag >>750933452 in >>750934414
>Based on a true story
>A nigger is totally fucking retarded
>People like him anyway
>He's treated like a hero on film and irl
>>750933089
Never let me go
>>750934414
Nope think gayer... Like Broadway gay.
>>750934545
Yes!
>>750934509
The Blindside
>>750934509
the blind side
>>750934641
Rent?
>>750934509
Shawshank redemption!!
>>750934509
radio
>>750934716
Yaaaaas
>>750934705
>>750934709
Good guess, but no.
>>750934751
Oh you!
>>750934802
Yes.
>>750932776
men in black
>>750934869
Is that a win?
Friends go to cabin
Play mix tape
One friend gets splinters in a painful place
takes place in a movie stars hair
directed by jack torrance
>>750935040
Evil Dead
>>750929445
Final Destination
>>750935040
Cabin in the woods
>>750935040
evil dead 2
>>750935125
Yes
It's a boxing movie.
>>750935106
Yup
>>750930688
A Serbian Film
>>750935241
Borat
>>750931080
Super.
Ash has to fight Mewtwo.
>>750935326
Winrar
The guy from 500 days of summer swallows the red pill and fucks Natalie Portman
A guy jerks off a horse, and an elephant.
>>750935241
Yep
>>750935613
Freddy got fingered
>>750935613
equus
Elvis befriends former president
They fight a Univeral monster
>>750935040
Evil dead
A grandpa & boy have some fun.
>>750935689
bubba ho-tep
>>750935589
Hesher, god that movie sucked!
>>750935722
Yup
>>750935710
We didn't see your home movies, anon.
a rockstar brain surgeon dr who type takes on dick from 3rd rock from the sun with the aid of sam from quincy
Akk akk akk!
This thread is past the bump limit and will 404 soon.
New thread here. Copypaste all your unsolved movies there.
>>750935812
>>750935812
>>750935812
>>750935812
See you there.
>>750935710
The Princess Bride
>>750935914
invaders from mars
>>750927188
Rick and morty
>>750935936
under-rated post
>>750935914
Mars attacks!
Sea of purple slime threatens horses
>>750935762
Dude! I love that movie!
>>750936044
Ghostbusters II
or
Power Rangers: The Movie
Just a final reminder to post all new movies in the new thread since this one is about to 404.
>>750935812
Tagging some people so they don't miss the final notice.
>>750935947
>>750935947
>>750935968
>>750935978
>>750935993
>>750936044
>>750936169
>>750936177
>>750936177