What's the most disgusting perverted thing you've ever done?
killed innocent villagers in Nam
>>750766660
Jerked off to a friends leaked nudes, even though I knew she was devastated about them. Came HARD.
>>750766660
Posted in OP's faggy thread
>>750766660
pissed myself for fetish purposes
Hid in the bushes outside a man's building so I could spy on him and make a map of his daily route.
>>750766825
you're a fag
>>750766772
post em
>>750766881
This was a good 8 years ago or so. Don't have them anymore.
put a webcam in female house mates room for a night
>>750766660
>>750766660
I inserted a carrot into my ass lubricated with olive oil when I was a kid and my friends found out (was home alone and friends came over, friends found carrot standing next to olive oil that I forgot in the bathroom, wanted to kys).
I also used my sisters panties and clothes while masturbating and one day when I went to check my drawer they were fucking gone (she found them and didn't say anything ever about it)
When I was a kid I jerked off to porn with other kids frequently , in groups, idk how I made it happen.
I got plenty more
>>750766851
lol u just pick a random person? were you interested in him sexually?
>>750766772
Damn that's messed up
>>750766660
Get my 19 year old ass rimmed and fingered by an 40 year old for bout 30min , felt really good tbh, Im not gay tho it was just a phase or I think so.
>>750766960
I also think I was kind of raped by my male cousin when I was like 5-6 and he was 7
>>750766660
stare at my teacher's boobs for 5 minutes straight.
don't blame me,she's young,has perfect body and single.
>>750766660
I sucked my dogs cock
I masturbated my friend when he was 5 and I was 7
uhh not much else other than that
had sex with a guy out of college when i was 13.
>>750766936
Show pic of panties
>>750767065
No; yes.
>>750767194
that's it? you must be a virgin if you think thats' bad
Wanked on my girlfriends face while she was sleeping and had her dildo up my arse
>>750767083
Yeah, I felt pretty bad about it. Had wanted to see her naked for fucking AGES. I was younger though.
>>750766660
Got really high out for a walk in the woods, I had a home made triple chocolate brownie with me for just such an occasion, (this one wasn't of the pot kind)
I ate it and it was so fucking good I got a boner, and was insanely horny.
It's common for me to get horny while I'm stoned but this was next fucking level, I literally had to relieve myself.
So I jerked off in the woods, having the most amazing orgasm of my life.
And as I was pulling my pants up I noticed an old lady was walking her dog nearby behind me.
I wonder if she saw me fapping or slinging my load into the grass off my hand after I had finished the act. I don't really care in all seriousness.
Gave my dad a blowjob so he'd pay for my intensive driving course.
>>750767190
Hahahahahaha sheeeeet
>>750766660
Eat my gfs from behind while she took my duck between her big and second toe and jerked me off
Came buckets
>>750766660
Fucked a feminist up the arse, the whole time degrading her, and calling her a whore and a slut.
Surprisingly, she was really into it.
>>750767190
Sucked your dog's cock? Honestly I don't understand why some people do this, it really makes me feel physically sick thinking about it.
>>750767436
She put your duck between her toes? That is seriously kinky.
>>750767457
No surprise there, they are all like that. They love being degraded while putting up a facade of man hating and "all sex is rape" and shit.
Problem is of she turns on you she's gonna say you raped her, as they always do.
>>750767457
pffff
>>750766660
Masturb8ed with step sisters panties. They still had a smell cuz she had just taken them off so I put it on my head and used another pair around my dick. Came loads tho, so worth it
Fucked a really butch short haired dyke. Pussy, up the bum, bj, everything.
>I diarrhea pooped in the ocean and the turds float due to my nasty diet. The tide washed my semi-liquid shit into the kids splashing and playing in front of me. The water was clear and I could see the brown stain slowly drift toward the shore into them. They kept splashing and playing and never noticed. I'm not even Indian and I kind of enjoyed it.
>>750766772
>Bought a laptop from my friends sister and found a video of her on there sucking some guys dick and fucking him. Guy wasn't her Husband. Jerked off so many times to it. Gave it to most of her guy friends. Never had the balls to post it, eventually lost it to time.
>I've lost count of how many times I fed Muslims pork and they commended me for how delicious it was.
>I anonymously harassed and tormented a kid relentlessly in college for months until he had a mental breakdown and dropped out. He played some stupid prank on me at school and proclaimed to himself and the other chads that he was a 'uber troll'. I broke him. The best part is that he was accusing his friends / roommates etc and was sure it was one of them screwing with him. He never found out it was me, and I got to watch him slip slower and slower into insanity everyday. Hear him argue with people and shit, it was fantastic. If you are by some miracle listening Jake, I am the one that trolls.
>Watched a livestream of someone saying they were going to kill themselves. Encouraged them with others. Didn't really think they would go through with it. They did.
>I fucked my ex girlfriend in her parents hot tub and had a 'didn't cum for a week' cum in the hot tub when I pulled out. I literally threw about 5 good ropes. We of course skidaddled to avoid the jizzim. Her family members got in not 10 minutes later and cooked in my seed.
I've done quite a few fucked up things
>>750766660
Believed in the Judeo-Christian god
>>750766660
jacked off to my mom's dirty panties while wearing her dirty pantyhose
Neighbor needed rent money, I needed a blowjob.
I came, she cried.
>>750766660
Broke into a really hot pair of sisters house from my high school and stole a bunch of underwear while they were sleeping in their rooms and such
>>750766660
I posted a penis on /wsg/
>>750766660
Jerked off to my cousin while she was sleeping in my bed for a night (I was on the couch).
>>750767733
pics of your neighbour?
>>750767818
Was years ago unfortunately
I spied on my daughter getting fucked by her boyfriend.
>>750766960
embarrassing shit right there
>>750767829
I've done shit like this my entire life and the only regret that I have is that I haven't done it more. Fuck this gay earth
>>750767676
>>I've lost count of how many times I fed Muslims pork and they commended me for how delicious it was.
You're fighting the good fight.
I had sex with 6 different women in a 24 hour period. Didn’t wash my dick between most of them. Enjoyed having them suck my cock knowing that they had no idea there were other girls juices on my dick. Not hookers. These were ex gfs, coworkers and fuck buddies.
>>750767511
I don't really know why I did it either, and wouldn't again. I was pretty degenerate.
>>750767942
you wish
>>750768003
Were you on drugs or something dude
>>750767942
and they were all 12 right anon?
>>750767942
Came on my friends younger sister's hairbrush hoping she uses it to masturbate, also stole her panties and bra.
Children
>>750768053
not on drugs, just fucked up in the head. I had a sexually abusive dad and neglectful mom. no education. I'm still a wreck today but not as degenerate.
>>750766660
jerked off during study hall in the library
jerked off in my 10th grade spanish class
Fucked a stuffed animal when I was 13. Came inside and left it there. Even though I'm not a furry.
Paid a dole-scum alcoholic dude to watch him fuck his (legal) daughter while I wanked off.
Go to the store
buy a Zucchini Squash
bring home
cut the end off, hollow out the insides
freeze the squash
freezing it damages it so it's softer when thawed
thaw it out, boil it to warm it up.
slather cooking oil inside it and fuck it.
have a large cup full of very salty water to store it in for multiple fucks.
porked my best friend while she was pregnant with her husbands child.
>>750767427
what's the story here?
I once masturbated to a video of myself masturbating to a video of myself masterminding to a video of myself masturbating.
Felt proper perverted after, just a shame I dint record it for masturbation purposes at a later date!
>>750768469
Hope you came inside of her. And it was a regular occurrence.
>>750767942
>I had sex with 6 different women in a 24 hour period
>>750768503
well the thing is I was moving across the country and we always had feelings for each other so it was now or never
>>750768522
Fuck that must have cost you alot of money.
>>750766960
pic of your sis today?
>>750768569
Was it just once, or did you make a day of it kinda thing?Was it worth it?
>>750767106
>got my ass rimmed and fingered by a 40y old guy
>im not gay
>>750767578
If that's the case, you fuck her some more.
>>750767173
pic of her?
>>750767457
Yeah, the most submissive bitch I've fucked was a feminist.
>>750768500
Pics or it didn't happen
>>750768287
Fucking kek
>>750766660
With a partner: had my wife dress up like a puppy, then I took her to the bathroom, laid her on her back and had her piss all over my dick as I jacked off, all as part of her puppy "training"
Solo: found a pair of filthy women's socks on the ground at the local dump. Grabbed them, stopped by a gas station on the way home, went into the bathroom and beat my dick with the dirty socks. Came hard af
>>750768113
Sorry to hear that man, hopefully you can keep getting better.
>>750767676
>not even indian
Underrated post. Ur Hilarious anon
>>750768616
just once, worth it
>>750768696
Well I didn't record it on that occasion so non exist... yet
>>750768486
Needed a licence quick and the courses are a couple of grand. Dad's a degenerate arsehole.
>>750768522
Nope...but this is me, and the pic is number 4
>>750768803
why do you have a picture of a ceiling fan on your wall?
>>750768203
things I 've stuck my dick in
>between the couch cushions
>between the mattress
>in the vacuum cleaner
>socks (of course)
>an old shoe
>the water jet at the Ramada Inn hotel
>your mom
>>750768769
I'm glad man. I had a friend hit me up for sex one night after a party when we were both pretty drunk. She had a boyfriend, and she ended up feeling guilty after she got naked. Still gave me a blowjob though, just disappointed I didn't get to fuck her.
>>750768803
And yes I’m old to you fucks...was 34 when I did it
>>750768847
>>750768799
Guy or Gal?
>>750768847
Thats a painting you fucking dipshit. Its called art. Get some culture.
>>750768803
what do you eat?
what's your activity level?
>>750768803
What's worth that weird painting of a fan on your wall all about? Is it original?
>>750766660
Fingered the disabled girl at my school until she came.
>>750768958
I eat what I want...moderate exercise. Always been fairly thin. I only exercise so I don’t gross regular women out. Couldn’t care less what the 9/10s think of me because I’d rather be around more humble 6-8s
I had sex with my wife in the missionary position for the sole purpose of procreation.
bumped into the big breasted girl in school on purpose
sat next to the big breasted girl in school on purpose
>>750769002
It’s high concept art...worth thousands.
Let my dog rim me as I wanked.
>>750769418
Shit was cash?
>>750767676
Top post, you earned these godly digits anon.
>>750769449
What does that even mean...?
>I pissed and came in the Soap and Shampoo dispenser of a Hotel.
>Stole dozens of pantys (incl. from a totaly 18 yo)
>pissed and came in my landlords food/shampoo/soap (shared storage room)
> fingered and licked my passed out best friend
this should be the worst as faping to traps is obligatory on this bord
>>750768944
Dudette.
I window peeped a girl I liked while she took a piss. She saw me.
>>750769521
Can’t tell if trolling or summer still here
Put shit in my mouth and pissed all over my face, then came into my shit filled mouth and swallowed.
>>750769335
lucky dude
I try to eat healthy, exercise like hell and still a fat tub of lard.
>>750768803
What's going on with the picture of a ceiling fan on the wall?
>>750769636
Everyone does that their first time jerking off. Quit trying to be special.
>>750768870
Are you by any chance from romania? Tell me your given name's first letter.
>>750769521
Is your name john?
>>750767614
t. Clementine Ford
>>750769683
Oh /b/ this is why I love you
>>750769750
Australia Broski
>>750769794
No..
>>750769586
How can you do that and still refer to him as just 'dad'?
>>750767421
Well played
Jacking it when you're baked and the music just feels like something else.
Cock snottin to phat jams
>>750769297
Down syndrome or wheelchair?
>>750769297
Greentext that shit.
>>750769379
sick bastard etc.
>>750769834
Oh god no.
I wouldn't fuck that with YOUR dick.
>>750769880
“Hey Faggots,
My name is John, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are fat, retarded, no-lifes who spend every second of their day looking at stupid ass pictures. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever gotten any pussy? I mean, I guess it’s fun making fun of people because of your own insecurities, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than jerking off to pictures on facebook.
Don’t be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I’m pretty much perfect. I was captain of the football team, and starter on my basketball team. What sports do you play, other than “jack off to naked drawn Japanese people”? I also get straight A’s, and have a banging hot girlfriend (She just blew me; Shit was SO cash). You are all faggots who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.
Pic Related: It’s me and my bitch"
>>750769864
Meh, i thought you were the one that cucked me.
I will one day stab that guy.
>>750769884
What should I be calling him?
>>750769959
Muscular Dystrophy
>>750769976
It's not much of a story, her friend told me that she like me so we had lunch together a few times and then one time she hinted she wasn't wearing any panties so I helped her out of her chair onto my lap and fingered her.
>>750770056
Hope you get your justice broski. I had my doubts/hesitations until she got her top off. And despite her guilt, sucked my cock like she meant it.
>>750766849
pissed myself multiple times ... not for fetish purposes tho ... just alcohol
>>750770059
/b/ loves incest. But it must have got weird after that.
>>750767676
God damn it, Anon.
I like you!
>>750770165
yeah, he lives in another city, but i'm moving there this year. If we ever cross paths i'll kill him. 4 years in jail are worth it.
>>750770604
Goes without saying that shit was also weird before.
>>750770654
Did they fuck, or did she just blow him? Trust me, its not worth killing him over some 2nd rate drunk head.
>>750770589
If you don't have atleast one story where you got so drunk that you pissed or shit yourself, you probably haven't had enough to drink.
>>750770707
Good point. Well at least you got something out of it. Did you pass?
>>750767676
Mostly fake and gay
>>750766660
In my teenage years i used to be very horny so once I´ve masturbated in public showers on swimming pool :) One dude saw me before I put him back to pants, walked away
>>750769640
Not the guy from the thread but you aren't trying hard enough anon.
You can't say you want something and still be fat. You dont have to do stupid diets or shit either, do some basic reading on real food and cooking and exercise properly with an attainable goal in mind. You will go far anon
>>750770709
Bitch said they just got naked then she felt bad and didnt do shit, but i can't trust that whore's word. I poisoned her dog after we broke up. She deserves no happiness. I am sorry the dog had to pay.
>>750770707
was he just a creepy man? Or had he actually tried shit before?
>>750766660
Sucked my girlfriends little sister’s toes while she was asleep
>>750770056
Godspeed, Vengeance-anon.
>>750770898
In my experiene, she got naked and felt bad shortly before getting on. Said she felt bad because of her boyfriend etc. Then said she felt bad about leading me on, and blew me as a middle ground. Probably had something similar happen.
>>750770898
You're a fucking disgrace. The dog didn't have to pay. You're a piece of shit. Drink bleach now.
On a school camp when I was 12, I smeared 'you're next' in period blood on the toilet wall as a prank.
Shot my hot thin load all over my wife’s cousins toothbrush, watched how she kept rubbing her fingers across her teeth afterwards
>>750770815
Failed the first one but passed a few days later.
>>750770912
He's a lecherous bastard. Always has been.
>>750767676
>I'm not even Indian and I kind of enjoyed it.
>>750768469
Look like a girl I fucked too
>>750771054
guess you were never hurt.
>>750771170
Did he cum hard?
>>750767190
did the dog look at you the same way afterwards?
>>750771217
>pressing in your stomach so your dick is visible
fucking kek
>>750767457
>Surprisingly
No.
>>750771217
>>750771341
>>750771278
Yeah I suppose.
>>750767942
I fail to see how this is bad.
>>750771170
Congratulations? He pay for the retest?
Ex in highschool gave me blueballs so I went to her restroom and rubbed one out in the body wash. She shared the restroom with her younger siblings.
>>750771488
Kinda hot. How did you feel?
>>750771537
Option for a retest was included in original price.
>>750768872
I believe you OP.
Done the same thing with 2 back to back.. dropped off my ex then went straight to the fuck buddy.
>>750768799
>arsehole
Anon what country are you in?
>>750771620
This is a really tame conversation for /b/
>>750768861
>between the couch cushions
same
>between the mattress
wasn't possible
>in the vacuum cleaner
you can get severely injured
>socks (of course)
never did this
>an old shoe
what?
>the water jet at the Ramada Inn hotel
ok
>your mom
no
>>750771261
Been hurt heaps of times faggot, don't take it out on fucking dogs you lowlife disgrace.
Fucking piece of shit. Drink the same poison you gave that dog. Faggot fuck. Fucking dumb cunt.
>>750767676
good post
>>750771428
That's a dumb name. I bet you put that entry in yourself.
>>750771580
Default emotion. Not great.
>>750771704
England.
Sniffed moms panties and shoes, only did it a few times, felt horribly guilty after.
>go to a brothel
>go into bedroom with ugly Chink hooker
>she sucks me, licks me, we fuck, etc
>can't cum from wearing a condom
>time is running out
>horn is wearing off
>desperate times call for desperate measures
>get her to lay on her belly with her feet hanging over the end of the bed
>i lick her feet while i beat off
>ready to cum quite quickly
>she finishes me off
>felt shitty afterward and haven't been to a hooker since (was a few years ago now)
>>750771802
At least I can see my dick when I stand up fatty.
>>750771833
Did you keep sucking after he came, or stop immediately?
>>750771869
That's a yes.
>And then he said, "I write for an online dictionary. I go by the name 'da trick biatch'."
>>750771869
Yeah, 'cause it's so small you sure as hell can't see it sitting down.
>>750767942
>>750771770
He foamed at the mouth and started convulsing. I watched at 3 am as he died.
Went home and sad-fapped.
>>750766660
>older brother is wealthy as fuck
>hes 12 years older than me
>be 4 years ago
>gets a hot, spic maid, that doesnt speak English to clean his house
>pic related
>he starts hooking up with her
>ends up marrying her, and adopting her daughter
>be me 2 years ago
>living with my mom
>mom gets sick and dies
>brother asks if I would like to move in with him and his family
>agree to it
>realize just how fucking hot his wetback wife is just after living there a few days, watching her walk around in skimpy "house clothes", yoga pants, and other hot, body hugging workout gear
>she doesn't work anymore, my brother relived her of having to
>all she does every day is take her daughter to school, go to the gym right after, comes home, showers, hangs around until she has to go and pick her daughter up from school
>one morning she leaves to take her daughter to school, and go to the gym
>I don't know why, but I make my way into their bedroom
>moments later I found myself eating pussy crust off her panties from the dirty clothes bin
>next thing you know, I have a clean pair of her panties wrapped around my dick while I fap
>end up cumming into a few pairs of her panties
>have never experienced orgasms this long, powerful, and voluminous
>put them back in her clean drawer for her to wear my cum against her pussy later
>for 2 years, whenever she leaves, morning, afternoon, ect, I cum in her clean panties, her shampoos, conditioners, lotions, food, ect
>she is literally wearing my cum on her cunt, in her hair, on her skin, and has my cum inside her body when she eats her food, Every. Single. day.
>even came up with a system for cumming in her panties
>only cum in light color panties (white, pink, beige, grey, light blue, ect). Cum tends to dry more visible in darker colors, so avoiding the dark colors not only keeps my despicable act unnoticed, but also leaves me underwear I can wear over my face like Bane, and eat pussy crust off of, and avoid eating my own old cum.
>>750771938
You know what, I wouldn't have been worried if you'd have poisoned your ex, but her fucking dog? You're such a low fucking cunt I hope you get aids. Fucking faggot.
>>750771940
Cont...
>one seemingly normal afternoon, I hear her leave to go pick her daughter up. Since i didn't cream her underwear in the morning, which is my preference, I drop my pants and underwear in my bedroom, and make my way over to her bedroom
>I first go through her dirty clothes hamper to munch on some pussy crust from the panties she was wearing at the gym earlier that day
>it was a little tiny thong
>i just ball it up, and shove the whole thing in my mouth
>find another dirty pair I hadn't snacked on yet
>put the crotch part of it in my mouth
>walk over to her panty drawer as I suck the flavor out of the panties in my mouth
>pull out multiple pairs of panties
>turn them inside out to were the silky, absorbent, crotch part of them are facing up so when I cum, the streams of jizz can spray across, and land on said silky, absorbent crotch part of the panties her pussy will hug when she wears them
>get another clean pair, wrap it around my dick, and start fapping
>like normal, im cum in like 20 seconds
>mid nut, in a complete and utter state of bliss, I turn my head to the right, and my sister in law, is standing at their bedroom door, with her mouth wide open, watching as I ejaculate into 4 pairs of her panties set out on top of her dresser, with no pants on, or around my ankles, my mouth is stuffed full of her panties, and I have a pair of her panties wrapped around my dick in the hand im milking my dick with
>I didn't know what to do, so i dropped the panties in my hand, spit out the panties in my mouth onto the floor, and walked out, no pants, cock still hard as fuck, dripping and all, leaving the panties covered in cum on her dresser
>>750770163
how old were you that fingering a cripple was appealing?
>>750770654
>4 years in jail
>For pre-meditated murder
Damn Eastern Europe. Just damn.
I voted for trump
/ thread.
>>750766660
Sucked on a sleeping girl's toe and smelled another sleeping girl's feet
>>750771975
why are people so against dog poisoning for revenge?
She took my happiness, i took hers. Dogs have no souls, they are inferior.
>>750771982
Cont...
>I was fucked. I didn't know what the hell I was going to do, obviously she's going to call my brother to tell him
>I hear her leave again, she must have forgot something, which is why she busted me
>grab my phone, turn it off, because there is no way I could face my brother yet
>i couldn't help but think about how colossal this was, and how done my brother is going to be with me.
>an hour later, she arrives with her daughter
>all of these scenarios start playing out in my head, so i start panicking
>be in a state of panick for a few hours until I see my brothers truck pull up
>my heart sinks
>I'm sweating bullets
>I hear him come in the house
>about an hour goes by, and nothing
>no knock at my door, nothing
>turn my phone on, and no texts from him, nothing
>I decide it's time to accept my fate
>walked towards the living room were I heard them watching t.v.
>as soon as I walk in, my brother greets me like normal
>the entire night goes by, dinner and all, and he never confronts me
>he is acting completely normal, like if nothing happened
>I wasn't sure what to make of it, but I didn't sleep that night
>the following morning I get a knock on my door
>it's my brothers wife
>she tells me in her broken English that she didn't tell my brother
>she asks how many times I've done it
>"just this once". A lie obviously, but she seemed to buy it
>she asks if I've done that to her daughter
>"no". Which is true
>she tells me if I ever do it again, she will leave my brother, take her daughter and disappear to Mexico.
>she says my brother will have no idea where, and how to find her
>I nodded in agreement
That was a few months back. Things have cooled, and I've since started cumming in her stuff again. I wish I could stop, but i cant. It's the closest to pussy I'll ever come to. It's 1,000,000x better than fapping to porn with my hand or even an onahole. Ontop of that, I'm so painfully attracted to her, and the way her pussy smells/tastes. I can't stop.
>>750770920
>>750772010
Done this but it was my cousin.
>>750772067
Because it wasn't the dog who hurt you, it was her.
That's like letting down the tyre's on your next door neighbours car because the other neighbour across the street almost hit you with his car.
Are you seriously that fucking stupid you dumb maggoty cunt?
>>750769297
Demand the full story here
>>750767676
>I'm not even Indian and I kind of enjoyed it.
forced myself in selfbondage to drink 1 liter of my own piss (or drown). Still feel disgusted
>>750771833
Did you swallow?
Fucked my gf at the time while she was sleeping.
Accidentally raped her when it was supposed to be Role Play. After a silent week of shame and avoidance she said it actually turned her on. Now when I just take her(rape), it's somehow more satisfying.
I used to print off pictures of one of my cousins and then jack off onto them. Used to cum so hard too. Aah the good old days
>>750771938
not that other anon
you need to watch this
https://www.youtube.comwatch?v=bc7ZMDRbF2s
in it this guy called destiny tries to make this asshat called XJ9 (yes i'm pretty sure he named himself after my life as a teenage robotto) that his 'revenge' was on an astronomically different level than what was done to him.
you're the same. poisoning her dog, regardless of how hurt you were, is not defensible. It would be reasonable to say 'I was overcome by my emotions and poisoned her dog, I regret it now', but the way you're phrasing it makes us thing you'd do it again.
Though most likely this is just bait and you are fake and a homosexual.
>>750771940
>>750772068
as if you would post it with a pic of her
>>750771917
I didn't linger any longer than necessary. Funky af.
>>750770163
Not really bad, it's not like she was a downie.
>>750772204
Yup.
>>750767849
Yikes!
So how did she do?
>>750767849
How envious were you of her bf?
>>750769750
i'm romanian and i hooked up with your girlfriend. the blowjob wasn't even that good.
Not a bad thing but something I'm pretty proud of non the less.
Got a gorgeous 18 year old who's auntie stays with her family to smell her dirty panties and cum fantasising about her
>>750771833
That sucks. England too.
>>750766733
executed 7 diaper heads (same family) in an afghan village for lying to my face
>>750766660
>New Years
>at family friends house
>have weird lipstick fetish at the time
>enter bathroom
>find I tube of lipstick
>put it in pocket
>go home
>parents are drunk
>I'm horny
>put on lipstick and start jacking off
>realize afterwards what I've done
>I'm a sick fuck I just realize
>keep lipstick at home for about half a year
>family friends drop by to visit one night
>outside talking to them and they seem really upset.
>oh my god they must've some how found out
>ask what's going on
>dad doesn't reply just acts devastated
>oh my god, I'm gonna forever be known as that perverted kid who jacks off to lipstick
>next day
>dad tells me they were just having a fight
>relieved as fuck
>>750772507
Should we execute you then basement boy ?
>>750767942
You are full off shit man.
>>750769750
I'm romanian. I once had a girl with a boyfriend suck my cock.
I met her one day when she was walking her dog. She loved the way I cared and loved her dog so much she was practically dripping in the pants.
She even told me she was going to suck my dick better than she'd ever done for her loser faggot boyfriend.
I loved making her look me in the eye while I fucked her throat.
>>750771996
I was 16, she was 15. I'd never been in a relationship before and she'd never been touched by a boy before.
>>750772341
Mentally she was perfectly normal, she was just physically wasting away.
>>750772602
>Mentally she was perfectly normal, she was just physically wasting away.
Yeah that's what I mean, crippies need loving too, really you did a good thing.
>>750766660
i told an american "it's nice to see you"
>>750772391
Not bad. Not brilliant. Obviously been watching porn.
>>750772417
A bit, but I'd never try it on with her. Just get a voyeuristic kick.
>>750767649
This is a 9 year old. Gtfo.
>>750772559
Can you tell your uncles and aunts to leave the uk I'm sick of them pushing their styrofoam cups in my face begging for spare change.
>>750772353
was this the first time you did anything like this for your dad?
>>750772488
>that sucks
Pardon the expression.
>>750766660
Masturbated to porn
>>750772760
Kek
I started a fight then as the other guys was more visciois and had knifes I ran away and left my friend to get murdered one against three.
I still feel bad I lost 20 quid while I sprinted away I hate losing money.
>>750772536
People don't generally do me favors...
>>750766660
I stood in front of my dog and jerked a load off into her face.
>>750772799
Sick cunt. kys, I bet there was a man AND a woman in it too. God you're depraved.
>>750771918
There are 14 definitions for that word in the dictionary. If it makes you feel better you can pretend I am da trick biatch. None of this will help with your front tire slim.
>>750771933
samefag, chink m00t ids plz you dumb nigger.
>>750771940
>I can wear over my face like Bane, and eat pussy crust off of, and avoid eating my own old cum.
this man is going places in life
>>750772000
That's not a bad deal if i could kill someone and only do 4 years I'd definitely do it.
>>750772067
Dogs are inherently good. Should have poisoned the bitch instead.
>>750772640
The only downside to doing it was explaining the wet patch on my trousers to my friends afterwards
>>750772882
Jew detected
>>750766660
I had consensual sex in the missionary position for the sole purpose of procreation
>>750772720
That's gypsies or "roma" not romanians.
Fuck you poms are fucking truly uneducated dumbshits.
>>750772353
Does "dudette" mean that you're some kind of trap or girly man?
Or does it mean you're actually a real girl with no Y chromosome?
>>750767720
You sick fuck
>>750773032
There are only real girls and real men. That's how the world works
>>750773004
Nevermind the excuses just recall all your peasant countrymen.
>>750772723
First time that specifically but he's basically a poor English Harvey Weinstein so, blurred lines.
>>750773032
The latter, unless I'm using it wrong.
>>750772960
the Jews have nothing on us tight fisted Scottish bastards.
>>750773169
Pic? We can decide
Sometimes I post pics of wife on /b/
I know this is a normal thing on here but I feel bad about it sometimes.
>>750773292
I missed that mate lets get a swatch of her
>>750769385
Raped the big breasted girl on purpose?
>>750773169
OK so if I recap what you said, you're a british girl who asked her dad to pay for driving license, in return he asked you to suck his cock, and you actually did it and swallowed your father's semen.
I agree with the other guy: pic.
Also, your age and your father's age when it happened.
>>750773144
They're obviously smarter than you inbred wonky toothed faggots.
They're sitting there taking your money for free while you go out and live the life of a chav all whilst hailing her majesty the queen.
shitting out side my garden.....thought i was just too lazy to go inside home..... does it count ? i did get plesure out of it...i was just lazy to to climb the stairs ya know my niggas?
Forced my female jack russell to lick my dick and came all over it's body by holding it in place.
Stole my sister's underwear and came in them.
Put my sister's underwear on a "lifesize" monkey plush and tried fucking it.
Stole my grandmother's underwear and came in them.
Put slamon on my asshole to make my Grandfather's male Japanese Akita lick my asshole.
Stuck a dry broom stick up my ass when I was like 13, there was blood on it.
Tried to fuck my male cousin when I was 13, jerked off in the same room as him, dryhumped him and rubbed my dick against him, he was 12.
Fantasised about being dominated and humiliated by my fat best friend by eating his asshole and came to the thought.
Fantasised about my grandfather, his son and his grandchildren all raping me in a massive orgy.
stuck a massive dildo in my ass whilst on the phone to my uncle
Stripped naked in public parks at night to get off
Make my friends cat sit on my lap so that I can get a boner and push it against the cat. Friend doesn't know.
Crossdress and cum into feminine clothing
Am aroused by humiliating or degrading women and have no empathy towards them.
There's probably a lot more I am forgetting but this is all I can think of right now.
by plesure i mean plesure of shitting ya know ?
>>750773429
Like I give those wastes of cum anything other than abuse n kick there pennies all over the street lol
>>750773169
What are some examples of blurred lines? What did he do that was suspect/bad
>>750771833
Checked.
So what's the go, he's basically been raping you his whole life and now you just blow him for cash?
Fucked a couple of kids in Thailand .... just a phase, over that shit now.
>>750766660
When I was between the ages of 14 and 16, I used to show up at my best friends house when only his mother was home. She would let me in, and after a bit I would use the restroom. I would leave my pants unzipped and position my dick so you could see it. I would walk around the house with my dick out, with just the two of us there. When I would spend the, eventually she started walking to the living room, where I slept on the couch, with no bottoms on. Towards the end of me going to their house, we were in the kitchen, just the two of us, while everyone else was downstairs, including her son and husband. I decided to make my move. I took my dick out, and we both sat down to talk, and she just happened to mention how nice my dick is. She started talking about fucking her husband, and started making loud moaning noises. I was diamonds. I started jerking off, and as her moans reached a peak, she told me to cum on her feet. I busted the largest nut in my life, all over her feet. She got up like nothing ever happened, besides the huge smile on her face. The kitchen had carpet in it, and there was a huge cumstain on it for the longest time. Everytime we were in the kitchen together, we would both look at it, and smile. She left her husband and moved to Florida not long after that. I kind of felt bad about it, but I still jerk off thinking about it every know and then.
fucked my mom's vibrator, while wearing her boyfriend's cockring and sniffing my sister's dirty panties, then i came in my mom's bra and put it back in her closet.
>>750773638
greentext
also what age and how long ago?
>>750766660
Looked at my female friends ankles
She was asking for it though fucking slut
>>750766660
I typed "women's boobies" into Google once.
Even now the evil seed of what I have done germinates within me...
Masturbated to my ex girlfriend's pics after she died from leukemia.
While she was alive, I also stalked her for two months after we broke up.
>>750773692
2012
One 15 year old while her sister watched
and a 9 year old
Oldfag, still can't greentext
>>750773755
She died from lukemia but was still alive ?
>>750773788
Okay, just type it out in a non text-wally format?
>>750773788
It's not hard. Just put a > in front of each line. Dumbarse.
>>750773788
How you fit your dick in a 9-year-old? Did it hurt them?
>>750773829
Found the wannabe nonce
>>750773577
>>750773614
Inappropriate touching for as long as I can remember. And I've wanked him off before but not had sex with him. He's a loser.
>>750773891
Learn what a word means before using it on other people.
>>750773877
She was tight, by my cock isn't huge.
Fuck greentext bullshit
>>750773804
Sorry I phrased that weirdly.
After we broke up, I stalked her for a while. Then I was sent to therapy (which was for the better, in retrospect), around 8 months later I'm told she's dead. It was also the first time I'd thought of her in a long time & I remembered I still had her nudes.
>>750774012
I know what it means fuck nugget. You're a wannabe kiddy for fiddler
>>750774035
Then just type it out in a readable format
>>750769297
>>750770163
more details please
>>750774085
The word you want is pedophile, and I really don't fucking care I just wanna read smut
nonce1
näns/
adjective
adjective:nonce
(of a word or expression) coined for or used on one occasion.
"a nonce usage"
Be the first guy to cum inside a girl's jailbait pussy
>feelsgoodman
>>750774035
How much us$ did you pay for 9/15yo?
>>750766772
heh, done the same
>>750766660
traded blowjobs with a stranger from the internet
>>750773964
what were some specific examples of inappropriate touching?
Do you mind talking about it?
>>750773964
Why'd you wank him off?
>>750766660
I've kneed a few girls in the cunt. Repeatedly.
They loved it. Kinky types.
>>750768769
Anymore pics
I tasted my own shit... didnt do it for sexual pleasure, just out of curiosity because I wanted to know what shit tastes like... guess what, it tastes like shit.. didnt do it again
>>750774460
Hard enough to bruise?
>>750774399
To get stuff.
>>750774372
I'm not greentexting an essay but just things like when he used to put sun cream on me, anything involving contact and putting his hands where he shouldn't. 'Accidentally' walking in on me in shower/toilet/bedroom. General lech behaviour.
>>750766660
>Be me
>11-12
>Super horny all the time
>Have a diaper fetish
>Local drug store has the candy shelves directly across from the baby diaper shelves
>Ideabulb.jpg
>Think people wont be suspicious about why a 11 year old is hanging around the diaper section
>Ride my bike there late one Saturday
>No one in store but me and the cashier
>Candy isle obscured, no cameras back then (mid 90's)
>Wearing baggy cargo shorts
>Let's do this
>Rip open pack of largest size Huggies at back of shelf
>Pack 2 or 3 in shorts pockets
>Not enough to cause buldge in shorts
>Grab whatever candy is on sale
>Walk back to front, pay, leave as fast as possible
>Bike outta there like chasing trains with big smoke
>Oceans11BellagioFountainsScene.mp4
>Realize my family is all home right now
>Fuck, now what?
>At the park trying to decide what to do
>Getting dark, only light is from Park bathroom
>Still desperately horny
>Ideabulbagain.jpg
>Go into bathroom
>Lewd myself in park bathroom while wearing a diaper
>Throw the rest in the trash can on the other side of the park in post-nut rage
>Bike home finally
>Shower, get in bed
>Cry myself to sleep
These are the moments I'll never forgive myself for
>>750774113
We were alone in a classroom together at lunch when she asked me to come a little bit closer. She stuttered that her tights had ripped and she could use some help with them. She lifted her skirt and I saw she had no underwear on, and she'd ripped the crotch on her tights open. I lifted her out of her chair and sat her on my lap and asked her if she wanted to have some fun. She guided my finger inside her and tried not to make too much noise. I wasn't sure if she had pissed herself or got really wet at the end though.
When I was younger I would "wrestle" with friends that turned into me try humping their ass. My sister forced me to eat her out a couple of times when I was younger. Used sister in law dildo on myself when I was about 15. When 21 had female roommate who left dildo in bathroom. Regularly used it on myself. Also would sniff her used shorts in the bathroom. She went out of town one weekend and I searched her room for used panties and found nothing. The rush from searching still lead to a great orgasm. Let's see what else... before getting a couple of dildos I would buy cucumbers and fuck those. I've tried fucking myself with my own dick with some success. Can suck my own dick if the day is right.. anally fucked my passed out GF and wife a couple of times..
>>750774709
That's kinda the weirdest anecdote I've ever heard, why were you into diapers at 11? lol
>>750774696
How did it make you feel at the time? Did it ever excite you?
>>750774863
I've had the fetish as long as I can remember. Hell, I used to steal my younger sisters diapers when I was 4
>>750768469
Looks like a hambeast, story?
>>750766660
fucked a man in the ass through a glory hole
>>750775018
How was it?
>>750774904
Nope. He's not really a nice bloke to be around anyway. Never had boundaries.
>>750766960
Dude that shit coulda happened to me.. I did some weird shit home alone and I did have the type of friends that would literally just show up and walk right inside ....
>>750775075
Thats a bummer. Sorry. What did it do to your sex life as an adult? Any noticable change?
>>750775075
How are you because of it all?
>>750767676
>I'm not even indian.
lmao..
>>750775066
It was okay. He slipped me a condom, put it on, his asshole pressed against the plywood wall, popped it right in, came in a couple of minutes.
I've had dozens of blowjobs that way, but that was a first.
>>750773470
what the fuck? are you autistic?
>>750775199
>>750775258
Nothing to compare to. I'm probably more cynical than most people. Sex life is ok.
I jacked off in a church parking lot when I was 13.
>>750774569
Fuck yeah.
>>750774696
What stuff.
>>750775358
Yes, and have many other unresolved mental illnesses.
I sometimes jerk off outside in huge bushes or in some weird alleys, especially when insanely drunk.
also I have masturbated with my 7yo sisters toys and my mum fucking found the toys next to lube and a lot of drug related stuff.
>>750775387
Ahh yeah, worded it weird I guess. I guess I meant and deviance, into younger/older, cfnm, handjob play, or quid pro quo roleplay.
>>750775427
but... why your grandparent?
>>750775438
Your mother probably thinks you're a paedo now.
Then again, you probably are.
>>750772068
Worthless beta ass faggot.
>>750775420
Stuff like iPhone etc. Doing A-levels but no job at the moment and he's not just gonna buy me things for the sake.
>>750775613
Fucking hell. He sounds like he could hire a whore for cheaper. Why does he keep coming back to you?
>>750775540
Idk, I don't have a conscience so I think I just go with things which play out in my mind, and those things happened to.
>>750766660
>Best friend got wasted drunk
>Fell asleep in my room
>Her bf fell asleep playing vidya downstairs
>I fucked her
>Blew inside
>Went downstairs
>Play vidya
>Her still drunk bf wakes up
>Tell him she went upstairs to sleep
>Say it's cool for him to go up
>He goes up and goes to sleep
>FF to the near future
>She got pregnant
>He doesn't believe it's his
>Gets DNA test
>Fails
>Says she cheated on him
>They break up
>I know it's mine
>Dude still has no clue
Many keks she was a party girl so thee's no telling who's it is. I'm not under any suspicion.
