Greentext thread
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Greentext thread
>>708215326
>no
>>708215326
Take some OC from last night!
Don't let this die please
>Be me
>About 13
>Have 3 neighbours out the back that share a long driveway
>One is a mud hut that terrorisers live in
>Arab neighbour is picking up pebbles off the driveway and trying to throw them through the fence gaps at my dog
>Other Arab kid is a double agent and informs of the attack
>Confront that rag head cunt
>He starts throwing the pebbles at me
>I'm on my lawn defenseless taking Taliban fire
>Having cleaned up dog shit for a week
>Just pick it up bare handed and start dropping dog bombs on Baghdad
>Taliban reinforcements arrive in the guys younger brother and sister
>I'm outgunned but my RPGs are to be feared (rapidly propelled grogens)
>Young kid from another house next door arrives and joins the fire fight
>Shit and pebbles raining down as the battle intensifies
>Lawn is nearly cleared of dog mines
>Pick up my final turd
>Toss it over the fence
>It breaks in to 2 pieces mid air
>Direct hit
>Terrorist sister gets blasted in the chest
>Taliban forces retreat to mudhut
>Me and neighbour kid celebrate the victory
>Return to base
>Go to the kitchen 15 minutes later and look through the window to see the devastation
>See the Taliban leader hosing dog shit out of the garage and down the driveway
>Taliban forces had been defeated and would never recover
>I am now feared
>>708219715
Screencapped
Ｗｏｗ Ｉ'ｖｅ ａｃｔｕａｌｌｙ ｎｅｖｅｒ ｒｅａｌｉｚｅｄ ｔｈｉｓ ｂｅｆｏｒｅ. Ｗｅ ａｒｅ ａｌｌ ｉｎ ｔｈｉｓ ｔｏｇｅｔｈｅｒ ａｎｄ ｗｅ ｈａｖｅ ｔｏ ｇｏ ａｌｌ ｔｈｅ ｗａｙ. Ｂｅｉｎｇ ｔｏｇｅｔｈｅｒ ｉｓ ｔｈｅ ｍｏｓｔ ｉｍｐｏｒｔａｎｔ ｔｈｉｎｇ ａｎｄ Ｉ'ｖｅ ａｌｗａｙｓ ｌｏｖｅｄ ｙｏｕ ｇｕｙｓ ａｎｄ ｉｔ ｒｅａｌｌｙ ｐａｉｎｓ ｍｅ ｔｏ ｓａｙ ｔｈｉｓ ｂｕｔ ｗｅ ｒｅａｌｌｙ ｈａｖｅ ｔｏ ｐｕｌｌ ｔｈｒｏｕｇｈ ｉｆ ｗｅ ｗａｎｔ ｔｈｉｓ ｔｏ ｗｏｒｋ. Ｔｈｅ ｆａｃｔ ｏｆ ｔｈｅ ｍａｔｔｅｒ ｉｓ ｔｈａｔ Ａｓｕｋａ ｉｓ ｔｒｕｌｙ ａｎ ａｍａｚｉｎｇ ｆｒｉｅｎｄ ｗｈｏ Ｉ ｋｎｏｗ ｗｉｌｌ ｓｕｐｐｏｒｔ ｍｅ ｉｎ ａｎｙｔｈｉｎｇ Ｉ ｄｏ. Ｉ ｃｏｍｐｌｅｔｅｌｙ ｒｅｓｐｅｃｔ ｙｏｕ ａｎｄ Ｉ'ｖｅ ａｌｗａｙｓ ｗａｎｔｅｄ ｙｏｕ ｄｅｅｐ ｉｎｓｉｄｅ ｏｆ ｍｅ ｊｕｓｔ ｌｉｋｅ ａ ｇｏｏｄ ｆｒｉｅｎｄ ｂｅｃａｕｓｅ Ｉ'ｖｅ ａｌｗａｙｓ ｓｅｅｎ ｙｏｕ ｔｈａｔ ｗａｙ. Ｉ ｋｎｏｗ ｙｏｕ ｗｏｎ'ｔ ｄｏ ｐｕｌｌ ｔｈａｔ ｓｈｉｔ ａｇａｉｎ ｓｏ ｔｈａｔ'ｓ ｗｈｙ Ｉ ｋｎｏｗ Ｉ ｃａｎ ｔｒｕｓｔ ｙｏｕ. Ｗｅ ｒｅａｌｌｙ ａｒｅ ｂｅｓｔ ｂｕｄｄｙ'ｓ ａｎｄ Ｉ ｋｎｏｗ ｍｅ ｓａｙｉｎｇ ｔｈｉｓ ｗｏｎ'ｔ ｍｅａｎ ａ ｌｏｔ ｂｕｔ Ｉ ｒｅａｌｌｙ ｔｒｕｌｙ ｌｏｖｅ ｙｏｕ ａｎｄ ｇｏｄ ｄａｍｎ ｄｏｅｓ ｉｔ ｆｅｅｌ ｇｏｏｄ ｔｏ ｓａｙ ｔｈａｔ. Ｍｙ ｈｅａｒｔ ｔｈｒｏｂｓ ｅｖｅｒｙ ｔｉｍｅ Ｉ'ｍ ａｒｏｕｎｄ ｙｏｕ ａｎｄ Ｉ ｅｖｅｒｙ ｄａｙ Ｉ ａｍ ｔｈｉｎｋｉｎｇ ａｂｏｕｔ ｙｏｕ ｃｏｎｓｔａｎｔｌｙ. Ｉ ｄｏｎ'ｔ ｒｅａｌｌｙ ｋｎｏｗ ｗｈｅｒｅ Ｉ'ｍ ｇｏｉｎｇ ｗｉｔｈ ｔｈｉｓ ｂｕｔ Ｉ ｊｕｓｔ ｒｅａｌｌｙ ｗａｎｔｅｄ ｔｏ ｔｅｌｌ ｙｏｕ ｔｈｉｓ ｂｅｃａｕｓｅ ｙｏｕ ａｒｅ ｒｅａｌｌｙ ｓｏｍｅ ｏｆ ｔｈｅ ｂｅｓｔ ｐｅｏｐｌｅ Ｉ ｈａｖｅ ｅｖｅｒ ａｃｑｕａｉｎｔｅｄ ｗｉｔｈ. Ｈｏｎｅｓｔｌｙ Ｉ ａｍ ｓｕｐｅｒ ｇｒａｔｅｆｕｌ ｔｈａｔ Ｉ ａｍ ａｂｌｅ ｔｏ ａｓｓｏｃｉａｔｅ ｗｉｔｈ ｙｏｕ. Ｔｈａｎｋ ｙｏｕ ｆｏｒ ｂｅｉｎｇ ｐｒｏｂａｂｌｙ ｔｈｅ ｂｅｓｔ ｐｅｏｐｌｅ ｅｖｅｒ, ａｎｄ Ｉ ｒｅｓｐｅｃｔ ｙｏｕ ｓｏ ｍｕｃｈ ｍｏｒｅ ｆｏｒ ｔｈａｔ. Ｉ ｌｏｖｅ ｙｏｕ ａｎｄ Ｉ ｃａｒｅ ｆｏｒ ｙｏｕ. Ｎｅｖｅｒ ｆｏｒｇｅｔ ｔｈａｔ.
No one got stories to tell?
>>708221754
How about the story I have of fucking our mum
>>708221204
Share?
>>708222069
*your
>>708221754
I do.
I've told this story before.
>Be me 3 years ago
>17
>Have fuckton of loli downloaded to pc
>One day my pc isn't working right
>Ask brother to fix it.
>Playing vidya while he fixes it
>Mom comes in
>"Alright anon, give me your computer."
>Why.jpg
>My brother found the loli
>He ratted me out
>Get pc taken away for 3 months
To make things worse, my sister died a month before that and she was molested when she was 12 so they bring that up to make me feel worse.
My mom cried because of the loli
mfw my family thinks I'm a pedophile
>>708215326
Fucking hell
No sad feels
Just hate
>>708222069
>fucking our mum
>our
>>708217783
>OC
>>708217783
you stupid fucking faggot
>>708215326
Kill your stepmother
>>708221204
If you post this on reddit I will kill you
>>708220462
gold
anyone got any requests? got niggers, tards, women, k, x, tg, misc.
How about you dump man?
>>708222633
Damn anon.
>>708225300
nice dubs. i'll take any and all you have!
>>708225381
24
>>708215326
That is just sad, just fucking sad
>>708225514
i have far too many, you gotta help me narrow my search my man.
i also have shit and fat
>>708217783
faggot
>>708225679
Didn't that motherfucker make a post a month or so later saying he got HIV from that?
>>708225300
/x/ please its been a long time
>>708225646
i lost a greentext folder trying to rebuild it, how about you post your favourite ones? I miss this particular one about Fallout New Vegas from the perspective of NPCs
>>708225679
26 and i'm now pretty much out
>Be me
>be late to class
>keep reading greentext
Worth
>>708225992
got a couple skyrim ones of a similar vein. buckle up
>>708226261
colour me buckled
>be me, boy, 7, first grade
>first day of school, parents tell me to sign up for after school math club, so I do
>math club starts two weeks later
>first day of math club, teacher says I’m not signed up and the club is full
>uh oh, nowhere to go, nothing to do for an hour until mom comes to pick me up
>get really angry (bad shit happening at home, parents screaming at each other all the time, having problems coping)
>have a tantrum, run outside with my backpack, decide to run away
>get about four blocks away from school, calm down, decide against running away, and decide to call mom to see if she’ll pick me up early
>go to nearest house, yellow, knock on door
>guy answers door, a little overweight, graying hair, glasses, dressed in t-shirt and sweatpants
>I ask if I can use his phone to call my mom to pick me up
>he stares at me for a good 10 seconds and then says, “Sure, come on in!”
>I go in, he directs me into his kitchen and points to the phone, “Here you go.”
>he goes past me into his living room and sits down in an armchair in front of his TV
>I pick up the phone and from there I can see what he’s watching on TV
>it’s naked people bumping against each other, no sound
>I stare at it for a while and then I put the phone back onto it’s cradle and say, “What’s that?!”
>he turns his head to look at me, smiling, and he says, “Oh, it’s just some people having some fun!”
>I keep staring at it, and after a while he says, “Do you want to watch it for a little while?”
>I do, so I go around his couch, put my backpack down, and take a seat in the middle, guy is to the right of the couch in his armchair
>guy unmutes the TV and there’s moaning and breathing and grunting and slapping noises against a background of generic music
>doggystyle wet penis pumping in and out of wet vagina, my first porn, I’m completely blown away
>not sure if I should be watching this
>I look over at the guy and I see his penis is tenting his sweatpants
more?
>>708225882
my absolute favorite one
do you want the few memey ones i have or do you want to be spooped?
>>708222633
>Have fuckton of loli downloaded to pc
they don't think you're a pedophile, they know so
>>708225972
???
so confused
>>708226460
fuck wrong image
>>708226439
god no
>>708226439
Continue.
>>708226337
you can unbuckle, i only had three.
Want d&d shit or something else? i have a rather prolific collection of a wide variety, if there was one you favored but lost in the purge maybe i have it.
in the mean time here is some shit
shit ones always make me laugh most of all
>>708221204
Post it?
>>708225300
nigger pls
>>708222633
Maybe you are?
>>708225081
kek'd hard.
>>708226941
D&Ds are usually pretty fucking sweet sure
>>708227014
we got a taker
anyone know how to have captcha just be the numbers?
Here's some of the loli I had 1/2
>>708227109
flip flop then. D&d
>>708227014
then nigger
>>708227179
also i know i can do something in settings, but i seem to always end up with street signs rather than numbers
>>708227179
buy 4chan pass --> no captcha
>>708227234
the only destijl i liked was the elizabeth one. the rest kinda spoop me
>>708226460
You know what spoop me I'm a security guard at a construction site with no one around
>>708227435
>paying
>for quicker access to an anonymous australian fishing rod repair forum
>>708227562
i'll flimflam you then
as you know, spoops are pretty hefty reads, hit me up when you need another
now i've got the gauntlet for d&d nigs and spoops
d&d combo
2/2
another quality spoop for security man
or maybe not. the one i wanted to post is too large
>>708223525
Holy fuck my sides
fucking niggers man, how do they 'work'
anyone still in here
>>708228981
Yes cunt
>>708227811
I am ready friend who in think may be my twin
>>708224677
fuck...that was painful
>>708229162
try to hit you with more spoops then
my other preferred one is too large sadly
>>708222880
Continuation?
hard to tell if they are spoops or memes, they are just in my x folder
why did the file size get reduced anyways?
>>708226199#
tfw you realize some people are bigger social retards than you
>>708223525
kek
>>708220401
Fake and gay
someone pick a letter
Hell yeah spoops and I don't care if there meme-y
>>708230523
i'll post what little is left in my x folder that fits
>>708230407
The letter t
Also I know if 2 anons post a picture at the same time ( even across boards) some times the files will get switched
>>708224255
well she's cute, better than becoming a schizo murderous beta for an ugly girl
>>708220401
HOLY SHIT FIGHTCLUB
>>708220462
Yes,this is gold.
>>708230777
keep picking, even if its t again
i have too many files, and this is more fun than randomly picking one
what about when the thmbnail doesn't match the image? no one of those grainy ones where that is the point, but one time i had posted part of a comic and the thmb was of kids in swimsuits playing. memes aside, i didn't even have that on my computer
>>708225514
Can't breathe hahaha
tired of fighting captcha
>>708226941
Funny ones please?
>>708223356
Im literally dying right now
>>708231288
You know I'm blaming spooks its about all I can do
this is from a few days ago
>>708217783
Working at a ren fair isn't like that at all my dude.
>>708227395
10/10
>>708217783
>newfag alert
>>708226697
more like this, /x/ is too full of spiritual retards to find spoopy creepypasta greentext without wading through a cacophony of cringey bullshit.
>>708233075
BAW threads are powerful things.
>>708220019
Kek
This is one from fucking /LIT/....crazy bastards
>>708231223
daaaaamn, this one
>>708223278
Fucking love this one
>>708226941
BUT WHAT WAS THE RECIPE???
>>708239425
Only the DM knows sadly
>>708239478
a mystery for the ages
>>708239597
But I had a thought could lycasin be an ingredient? It's what's in those sugar free gummie bears that fucked people
>>708222633
you are a pedophile
the only right thing you can do now is kill yourself
