What's the fastest way to get someone to unironically worship you, /b/? I have a severe god complex, so I want someone to worship me as an actual god. Its not easy but there has to be a way. Like pay for your face to be made into a gold statue, and then ship it to some poor hindu community that doesn't know any better and tell them its shiva. If you do it a few times, its statistically likely that some use it unironically. I just want to become a god.
>>707816244
Develop mutant powers.
>>707816386
I don't think that's that easy.
Power OP, if you have enough power, you can do whatever you want in our modern society.
I'd say that first you need to get money, then you can begin to gather political influence, once you have enough influence, people will start to respect you, ence, fear you, and through fear, you earn control.
Not even homosexual faggots would worship an insecure, narcissistic queer like you. Come up with a more realistic goal.
>>707817030
That would take too much time and effort. There has to be a shortcut. People do worship celebrities somewhat, but that's not the same. I don't have the time and money to drop becoming famous on youtube.
>>707817061
It doesn't have to be a lot of people. A few people should be realistic.
>>707816244
Blackmail
>>707817666
>>707816244
The whole concept of this thread is fucking cancer and I don't know why I'd ever give a narcissist shit ideas but by far the best way to accomplish your goal would be to claim to be a prophet and start a cult.
>>707817179
>There has to be a shortcut.
Look up psychiatry and behavioral science books.
Find out common mental weaknesses and insecurities, how to detect and exploit them, then start your own cult.
>>707817737
I'm pretty sure most people who try this fail.
>>707817885
Original image source pls?
>>707818491
I don't have it. Sorry anon.
>>707817923
You're right, you'd have to do it the right way.
>>707817922 gives a pretty good example, but people like koresh probably accomplished it out of sheer charisma and skill, so I suppose it depends. Try researching holy books and come up with some bullshit claim about a portion of them that dumber people might not be well-versed in.
Then get the gullible to follow you and split off from their church.
I suppose you could pay an escort.
>>707816244
>i need intensive therapy
>>707816244
Unicron?
Just get swole as fuck moon size....
>>707818818
Nah, I'm not insane. Just because this is something insane people want doesn't mean everyone who does is insane. No one questions when celebrities act like they are gods. Hell, most people think its the correct structure of society.
Go to therapy
>Therapist is forced to listen to your narcissistic faggot ass for 1 hour+
>Can help your psychotic mind get rid of its god delusion
>>707819592
Or he could follow my instructions and become the next David Koresh.
Or just a faggot that everyone makes fun of because he fucked up his prophet charisma game
All I do is wish OP good luck in starting the next suicide/sex cult.
>>707816244
Why not try to be a hero? Try to help people. If you succeed, people will love you.
>>707819592
But why? I don't want or need this. I'm not going to kill anyone. I just want to be worshiped.
>>707816244
Have a successful cult and mythology
>>707819798
No they wont. The most effective way to be a hero on earth is to donate money to the against malaria foundation. Unless you literally invent advanced tech that saves huge amounts, this is by far the most anyone can ever do. But you won't get recognition for it.
Have kids... And be there for them. Support them and guide them into the right direction. Abstain from drugs but be open minded and aspiratious always. It sets them up for success and gives them a role model. It eventually makes them want to be like you... And always look up to you... It starts out as to godhood, and then gets to higher and higher levels... Surpasses godhood
Or hey, get fit as fuck and learn how to drink heavily and not be a total dick, just enough of one. Then practice picking up chicks... They will treat you like a god (partially effective but hey, your getting more in 5 days tops so chill the fuck out)
>>707816244
I am a God.
Is this your wish?
>>707820386
The guy's talking about having dozens of men and women worship him, and depending on his intentions, provide him with a harem.
By the way OP, if you're against the prophet idea morally, don't, just look at your narcissist friends of the past, they have changed the fucking course of history and are revered despite the fact that they were just like you.
>David Koresh: we already mentioned him, he was attractive and charismatic enough to get a harem out of it
>Mohammed: Same thing but he was in it for the sex and power
>Jesus: Master of charisma and pretending to be a prophet
>Joseph Smith: Came up with a BS story about plates and made sure he never had to prove it; got a harem and plenty of power out of it
Buy a dog, treat it well. You'll get that feeling.
>>707816244
Grow tits
>>707821062
Oh yeah I forgot a few
Buddha: Meditated and said cryptic shit (much like the other prophets mentioned) so people would think there's something to him
Confuscious: Came up with inspirational quotes and said cryptic shit for pretty much the same effect
Aum Shinrikyo: Another cult where a dude said made-up shit about holy books and acted cryptic and ended up making a militia.
>>707819911
>I just want to be worshiped
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grandiose_delusions
>>707816244
Here's the thing, you can't.
The only plausible thing you could do, is get into a relationship with a very insecure girl, and slowly tear her down. To the point that she thinks she's worthless and you're the only one kind enough to care about her.
Still will probably fail however, and I doubt you want to be a dick
>>707821584
I mean, I did the opposite. I met someone already insecure and helped her get better and she thinks I have magic psychology powers now. But that's not the same.
>>707816244
fuck off.
you're less than nothing.
>>707821734
She doesn't worship you, there's nothing linking her to you now.
If you tear the girl down she stays with you because she think your the only one that loves her
If you help her up, she can leave with no reason to stay, and because she's more confident now, she'll have no problem telling you to fuck off
>>707822125
You might be terrible at dealing with people, but not everyone is. You don't have to be abusive to get a secure relationship. Nor is an abusive one preferable.
>>707816244
Become a steady source of heroin to some junkies and they'll do just about anything for you.
>>707822481
This is fairly plausible.
>>707816244
I can help u with that, but i need u 24h/24 7/7 and u may become a god in 3 years
>>707822287
When did this become relationship advice? This is advice on how to get someone to worship you
A steady relationship isn't worship
>>707822846
And worship isn't abuse. Why would anyone want to be the head of a devil worshiping religion where they are only worshiped out of fear instead of someone people truly think is great. Being a god isn't about harming people to maintain power, but about being a truly exemplary being people should look up to.
>>707817061
so bitchy, just chillax yon dorkus
>>707823218
The problem is, you aren't a god, not even fucking close. You're not great, you're not an exemplary being. You're human, and probably a shitty one at that.
So your only way to become "worshiped" is doing shitty things.
You asked for advice to be worshiped, I gave it. You want my real advice? Seek therapy
>>707823666
>>707823218
Well, what is your definition of "harming" people? If it is manipulating them to happily do what you want then I'm afraid you have no options.
Seriously fam just remember that even Jesus had your desires
>>707816244
If you deep throat me while I take a shit i'll call you "god".
>>707823531
Nonsense. You think the scale of action ranges from uninteresting to shitty? You must lack creativity.
>>707823710
>Well, what is your definition of "harming" people? If it is manipulating them to happily do what you want then I'm afraid you have no options.
That's not the definition of harm. If you manipulated someone who is fat as fuck into dieting and getting healthy its obviously a benefit, not a harm. The outcome obviously is related to whether its a harm.
You want to be worshipped as a god?
Become one.
I used to be worshiped by a beautiful loli tier girl. She was by my side and down to do anything I tell her to 24/7, I fucked up a lot and now she's gone. After knowing the true virtues and pushed boundaries of human affection, everything else is pointless. Better to just never discover it.
>>707824025
Kek, delusions of grandeur are a bitch huh? Anything creative, you wouldn't be able to pull off. Like I said friend, Seek help
>>707824695
Be careful anon, you'll make him angry if you suggest he can't do everything
>>707824196
I'm talking about OP's situation. By all means, unless he becomes famous in another way which he said was already not an option, the ONLY way he could get people to mindlessly follow him would be by doing something negative to them
At the very least you'd have to waste their time with this worship.
>>707816244
Contact info? I'm intrigued.
>>707818769
But how do I effectively Ron Hubbard people out of millions
Like where do gullible people gather?
>>707816244
Lie while making the others self destruct if they doubt you.
You need to use subliminal guilt as well as dependency.
You also need to beat the ego down till it's a miserable crawling sad creature then you give it small doses of catharsis.
I have 3 believers. They carved my name on their chest.
Listen and follow what I said.
Good luck
>>707825221
I'm not insane enough to post my info on /b/.
>>707824695
I can do tons of creative things. I invented the idea of a grill pool you can use that's faced inside your pool to grill while in the pool. You just have to not mind when shit gets in your pool water. But a few onions and hamburger pieces aren't the end of the world.
>>707829042
That's why you have throwaways
>>707825221
What would you want to talk about anon
>>707816244
You'll never become a god.
>>707829424
That picture makes me want to lick it.
>>707816244
I hear if op kills himself, and leaves a message about how he's left this mortal plane because of his spiritual awakening, reply to this or your mother will die in her sleep tonight.
>>707829340
I'm fascinated by cults. Hearing about how you got to this point would be interesting
>>707816244
It will never happen. You come here asking how to be seen as a god. Do you realise how ridiculous it sounds?
Ask yourself what would you do any different if you were a "god".
Then ask yourself why you wouldn't do it as a man.
>>707829424
Kanye is a penis then?
>>707829829
I don't think he'd disagree
>>707829690
That post wasn't me. And there's no particular story. Once there was a wasp hive in my room. It was summer so I left my window open and it was over my bed. It wasn't a huge one. Maybe like twenty wasps at most. I decided to leave it there, because they didn't get in my way and they never came into the room. They were kind of like my pets. I would look at them pretty closely and they still never did anything. I remember thinking it would be pretty funny if I made a small brazen statue of myself so they could worship me. Then That winter I had to close the window, and by next spring the hive was abandoned. So I forgot about it.
When thinking about the concept of divinity later on, it made me realize that it was a little bizarre that celebrities are more or less treated like gods. People put icons of them in their room. And they assume that merely being famous means they are qualified to talk about things they know nothing about. Some people make their whole life revolve around them. I was unfortunate enough to know in the past people who as teenagers literally worshipped the members of blink 182 because they thought that it was funny that they made sex jokes. Its something bizarre about human nature. At the end, the idea of gods is just taking hierarchical thinking that pretty much everyone already uses, and extending it past humanity to some other kind of thing. Its weird and arbitrary, yet its rare to see someone divorce themself from it entirely.
So there's no particular story. Its the same as someone saying they think it would be cool to be famous. But I don't really care about fame that much. It just brings tons of scrutiny, and it gets really awkward when tons of eyes are on you. Even if I made something a lot of people would know about, I'd probably divorce it from myself, and try to avoid attention. So to me it just seems like a more pure better version of that and more unique to become an actual worshipped god instead. Even if only by a few.
>>707830134
*puts on It ain't me...
>>707830239
What?
>>707830391
I am God. Don't question me.
>>707830134
I used to have a weird online friend that literally worshiped Kim Kardashian as his god. Jacking off to her was his form of prayer or meditation.
>>707830502
did he actually use the word god? or goddess?
very different...
>>707830650
He used both god and goddess at times. He fantasized about her and her sisters and the Jenner daughters to an extreme
>>707830802
lol well people can be very odd with their fantasies...
>>707830502
Is it okay to actually worship a fictional god from a videogame. I mean, as a jungian archetype. Jung told me it was okay
>>707830863
Yeah they can. I didn't really think too much about it til I saw this thread
Wander into a desert for a while and drink some cactus juice, write down what you see
It's worked before
>>707830928
I'd think you could worship anything, whether it's fictitious or not. Fictional characters can become real to you if you dwell on them long enough
>>707830928
You can say it's God. But it's really just a part of you.
>>707831199
>>707831122
It doesn't have to be a part of you. Think of it this way. "You" is a construct anyways. an analogue tio effectively anything you want exists as long as you use the right paradigm. For the same reason drawing lines around yourself to think you are a stable thing is meaningful, you can draw lines around other arbitrary things to quantify a real segment of the world. So there is underlying truth to things, as long as you describe them in this thematic sense.
