Navigation: /b/ - Random [Archive] | Search | [Home]
RandomArchive logo

tell me how you lost your virginity, /b/

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 323
Thread images: 27
tell me how you lost your virginity, /b/
I had sex
ur mom lol
Paid 100 to a tranny hooker. She poped my cherry like a champ. Went back home, showered and found out that my anus was bleeding a little.
Stuck muh dick in a pussy.
Hooker. Done within five minutes of her bj.
>be 18
>hotel room
>beg her to let me stick the flute in
>finally agrees
>out of condoms
i was drunk
found a hooker
was awful
My current gf of 5 years told me 4 months after we started dating to sneak into her room through a window, and yeah, thats how i lost my virginity
File: 1442797073000.jpg (23 KB, 499x750) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
23 KB, 499x750
I put my penis in a woman's vagina.

to my fat mexican babysitter. i was 13. didnt care she was fat. got laid.
One day anon
File: IMG_3924.jpg (21 KB, 511x288) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
21 KB, 511x288
I didn't
I was 16, gf was 14, was in her parents house whilst they were downstairs we fucked in her room, was fucking awesome.
File: 310.jpg (30 KB, 600x646) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
30 KB, 600x646
I never lost it
i didn't

>run to 7/11
>gets call from bitch
>picking up condoms in front of sand nigger staring me down
>get call
>"anon don't forget to get latex free, i'm allergic"
>no latex free
>run to coles
No. Kill yourself. Pastas like this belong to groups of teens who circlejerk it afterwards
KILL ME!!!!!!!
Please Continue
I was 18, she was 23. She told me she didn't have a boyfriend. I fucker her raw and came inside her. She got pregnant and her boyfriend paid for the abortion.
should have just gotten latex and maybe her puss would puff up. otherwise it would have just been a great prank
>I din't
>I never lost it

how many years until wizard?
>Be 22
>She 40
>Fucked some guys wife I met online
>Still at it
>She has 2 kids
>She fucks him 1-2 tikes a month to play happy family
>Poss more but I'm into the whole cuck thing
>Love sending her home full of my cum

Milfs are awesome.
File: 1473835075045.gif (900 KB, 305x196) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
900 KB, 305x196
Not your personal army, Faggot.
Kill yourself
Ill overdose, its okay
12 years ago in the back of my mom's truck. 17 and horny.
17 Sitting in my room with my girlfriend at the time, watching some movie or shit, say, I want sex, you good right now? She gave me a funny look (phrasing I'm sure), then nodded asked if I had a rubber. "Yup" she started sucking my dick, ask me to be slow I'm a little thick (I'm not long 5.8 ) fuck for a while she went home stayed together for a few years, never got to into the relationship more then the sex and interests I don't think ether of us ever loved each other.
File: 147609979772.jpg (7 KB, 224x225) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
7 KB, 224x225

>get condoms
>spend 10m trying to get it in, bitch dry as fuck
>losing boner
>finally get it in
>5m pass
>"anon you can finish whenever i dont want to do this anymore
>fuck you too bitch
>roll over
>secretly broken inside
>"anon, are you ok?"
>"why wouldn't i be, anonette?"

sometimes i just wish i got a hooker instead

lost it to this album

>thinking love exists and/or is worth pursuing

Haha nah
one of the reasons I'm scared of even attempting
fuck my brain
how old are you
just do it while you're both drunk, or get a hooker

pour water on her puss
then she'd be wet
Alright, here's my story
>be 18
>freshman year of college
>at a frat pregame
>make conversation with short Jewess
>she's about a 6/10
>she starts close talking
>wants me to go with her to the bar (it's more like a dance club than a bar)
>we both drunkenly head over to the dance floor
>she begins grinding her ass against my dick with the friction of an electric power sander
>wants to make out in a corner
>I find PDA repulsive, but decide that it's the only way for me to escalate the action
>we head back to her dorm
>make out in her bed
>says she would have sex with me but her room mate would be back soon
>asks "will you be able to finish quickly if I blow you?"
>reply with "uhh.... That's up to you"
>without a word she begins bobbing her head up and down like she is trying to hammer a nail into my lower abdomen using only her forehead
>she sternly says "don't cum in my mouth."
>pull out and finish on her tits
>she gives me her number and tells me to stop by later so we can bang

File: $morty$.jpg (9 KB, 211x239) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
9 KB, 211x239
With a girl at my boss's birthday party. It was a restaurant/cabin rentout place a worked a summer at, she legit just asked to see my six pack then we made out and I took her to an empty cabin and we fucked for 3-4 hours, slept a few, then fucked again. I have never picked up a girl since, I'm pretty good looking and funny when nothing is at stake but autismo when it comes to initiating sex so every girl that ive slept with has approached me.

stopped reading after you said she was a jew
I'm sure attempting is the least of your problems.
Friendly reminder that you're not failing for lack of trying.

Hey guys look at this edgemaster
> samefag

My first time anal was the best sexual experience, 22 , new girl start having sex, going at it a little rough, get out of rhythm, slips out , goes about 1/3 the way in her ass, she moans, doesn't tell me to stop, start go back and forth from pussy to ass to lube it up a bit, she's loving it, she starts rubbing her clit holding my nuts, holding her left him and her hair (she doesn't like pulling but holding is ok) she cums and it tightly squeezes my dick (feels good man) crave that shit the rest of my life. Now my wife.
I don't understand how it's so difficult for some people.

19th Birthday
>highschool sweetheart I met after graduating over facebook
>fooled around at my place after 3rd date
>after dating like a month, (this is the night of my 19th birthday after dinner) we go back to my place and roll around on the bed a little fooling around
>I bought some rubbers at walgreens like 3 weeks earlier
>tell her "hey lets try out those rubbers for my birthday"/spaghetti.exe
>she's like ight, happy birthday
>I put it on, she jerks me off a little, I eat her out, get her wet because I'm not a dumbass like >>707313272
>put it in
>so fucking warm
>fuck her for like 4 hours in all different positions
>felt significantly better about my entire life and have never been suicidal again since.

Now sex is easy shit, fooled around with a girl after we broke up because she was a spoiled bitch, I even fucked a dude before I met my current gf.

Protip: Once you learn that women decide if they're going to fuck you in like the first hour of meeting you you're golden. Men who are into that sort of shit will fuck you regardless, just because why not?
> virgin detected
More like edgemeister.

>implying self loathing jew
Put my dick in my girlfriend.

tell the story of the guy you fucked
faded at house party, fuck chick who had a crush on me in my class. don't remember any of it.
>be 16
>first girlfriend
>she jerked me off in a tent the week earlier for 1st time
>go to her room
>she initiates
>be nervous
>can't get it up
>try again the next day

if you don't remember any of it then how do you know it happened, hmmmm?
Consensual sex in the missionary position
I had a crush on the hottest girl of my school. Her best friend was a fatty and thought I was hot. Crush had a bf who was an alfa Rambo and would beat all her guyfriends because alfa male.
>I fucked the fatty
I didn't, turning 20 in two weeks. Need a drug that makes me social enough to go to a club. Did mdma last month so that's not an option.

there's always a fucking degenerate in these threads.
File: 1472825284601.jpg (164 KB, 1080x1920) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
164 KB, 1080x1920
My dad went on holiday and left his house empty, let my self in with the spare key i had and fucked my girlfriend there
ive never tried
i've been at the point where i was asked "want to fuck?" and i said no
im a loser
im a fucking moron
File: popcrn.gif (2 MB, 256x192) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
2 MB, 256x192
>be horny teenager
>send dick pics to every girl I know
>one of those girls said that her mom also sends nudes to everyone she knows
>send dick pics to her mom
>wanna fuck?
>yes please
i paid $300 to fuck a prostitute. It was good

my father used to molest me.
First time anal is always the best.

>Cuddling under blanket with girl
>Pulls my dick out and pulls her pants down
>Puts my cock inside her, tells me to go slow
>Say "Uh...what hole am I in?" like a fucking moron
>She says don't worry about it and tells me to enjoy it
>Starts begging me to cum in her
>Whispered moans of "Fill me up!" and "Give me your cum!"
>Eyes roll back in my head and I cum so hard my soul gets dragged out

I've loved anal ever since. I've been the first time for every other girlfriend I've had.
>be 16
>friends tell girl im a good root (never rooted obvs)
>she takes me home
>basically stick my nose up her pussy trying to eat her out
>blow after 30 odd pumps
>man those tits.. just like bags of sand
>a month ago
>chat up qt with online dating
>meet up really late
>awkward conversation gets broken by random make out session
>slowly keep trying more and more, pushing it a little bit at a time
>after 3 hours of stealing bases, we are both naked
>I start dry humping naked
>dont expect she would be comfortable going the whole way, especially without a condom
>she grabs it and puts it inside her, so I go to town
>tfw no virgin any more
Are you counting that as your first time or your response for not having sex?
how fat are you both?

first time.
Anal makes my wife cum in like 5 min and that's good bc it makes me come in 5 min heh
Best friend's older sister's college roommate.
She was 20 and I was 16
>>fuck her for like 4 hours in all different positions
Yeah sure, virginfag
I cant possibly imagine thats good for either of you

All the women i've talked about sex said they dont need hours of brainless fucking, at least not on one round

Tell story
File: image.png (8 KB, 960x540) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
8 KB, 960x540
>a few days go by
>I hit her up with a text and tell her that I'd like to meet her uptown again
>her reply contains half of the emoji alphabet, but I could piece together that her response meant "ok, I'll meet you there"
>things go pretty similar to any night on the town
>get drunk
>meet her at the bar
>pretend to enjoy dancing
>etc. etc.
>she wants me to walk her home
>condom is burning hole in my back pocket
>we get into her bed and get undressed
>she asks if I've ever done this before
>I say "yeah... Like three times"
>she blows me for a few seconds and my dick already feels like it is going to explode
>put on condom and enter into her pink Jew hole
>I last about five seconds
>try to pretend I didn't bust, but I ended up just going, "err.... Sorry..."
>she follows up with "anon, I literally don't care. Can you get hard again?"
>I was definitely not expecting that response
>say "yeah definitely"
>go down on her
>get hard
>re-enter for round two
>I have no idea what I'm doing but she seems to be enjoying herself
>actually got her to climax (to my surprise)
>pulled out and busted on her back
>everything seemed to be going well
>I get out of bed and start putting my clothes back on
>I think of something to say before I leave
>"make sure to give me five stars on Yelp"
>she looks at me with disgust
>she replies with "don't make it awkward."
>kicks me out of her room
>I walk home and think to myself "cool I'm not a virgin anymore"
>eat some bagel bites
>go to send her a text
>number is blocked

Things went better than expected
This feels like /b/s first time.
>be 19, she's 17
>living in shit studio motel with mom
>we all hang out, she and mom were cool at the time
>girlfriend and i planned out doing the deed
>tell mom i need her to kick rocks for a while
>mom is kind of a bro in situations like that
>drops us back at the place
>"I've got some stuff i gotta do. Be back in an hour"
>get it on
>didn't last long, cause virgin, also her ex had tiny dick, so she wasn't stretched out enough
>still with her today, 14 years later
>Be 17
>Made out with fat chick at a party
>Later decide we should have a relationship
>Want to have our first time on this Saturday
>We are both nervous
>She is just laying there, i have to do everything
>She bleeds a bit and has a bit of pain, but is alright with it
>I cum after around 10 mins ( had a few drinks earlier so i lasted longer than i anticipated )
>Break up 1 Week later, because she was ugly and i just wanted to somehow lose my virginity

Holy shit i was such an awkward fucker back then jesus christ.
we are both really skinny. why is that even relevant?
You too huh
>be me, 16
>girlfriend and I decide we're ready to take each others v card
>her parents are out every Saturday morning for her lil bros soccer games
>ride my bike over 1 hour to get to her house
>get there
>set up some candles, music
>she puts on red lingerie
>wants first time to be special
>we make out, grind on each other
>I take off my shirt, then whip it out.
>I lay back on her bed and she gets on top of me
>she starts sucking, feels good
She wasn't the best at giving head, and couldn't go very deep, but at the time I was not complaining
>put condom on as she gets on her back
>stick it in, very tight squeeze
>after some very tight chokes on my dick, she loosens up
>go at it for a few minutes
>she wants to get on top
>she rides me till I cum
>paranoid bitch wouldn't let me cum inside her, even with a condom
>take condom off, it's smells rank and stained red
All in all not too bad for a first time
File: raeptiem.jpg (51 KB, 625x473) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
51 KB, 625x473
Nah, that would be rape time with loli.
>20 about to leave for BMT inna USAF
>get about halfway through a bottle of evan williams and notice this little irl embodiment of a half asian catboy who has crossdressing tendencies that used to hang out with this girl I talked to in highschool
>pretty much just flat out tell him something like "hey want to bang before I go and get possibly vaporized" and he sort of said something like "okay nyan~" etc etc.
> go to his apartment and he's shaved off all his bodyhair and is slick as a fucking..
to this day still the most attractive thing I have seen with my dick imho
>long shoulder length hair, about 150lbs, 5'4"ish, light skin, and completely fucking schizophrenic
>we talk and play some destiny on xbone, he starts moving closer rubbing his ass on my dick
>start to grab his tits and remember he's not a titbeast
>bite his neck and nibble his ear, he kisses me on the lips
>not very good at kissing but acts like I am the one who doesn't know wtf I'm doing
>he turns around with the grace only a femboy can create and pushes me down on the bed and pulls his jeans down to reveal a pair of thin white cotton panties and the cutest little uncut dick I believe I've ever seen, unmatched by any chisel jawed wannabe trap in some /b/ tier trap thread
>frottage ensues
>work panties off
>"want me to get my boobs anon?"
>puts on a little stuffed bra and more grinding ensues
>slip a few fingers in, coat cock in lotion
>destroy ass
>cuddle like a couple for the rest of the night, he tells me to kindly gtfo in the morning
>I'm fine with it because he's a compulsive liar and the whatnot was getting annoying
>hang out a little after getting kicked out of the USAF for being a weak kneed bitch or what have you
never did it again, didn't want to stick my dick in crazy, I also knew the time I got a big smear of shit on my dick it would have to be over.
I wish I had a picture. He was scared of pictures, never took one without makeup and tits on. pas

Plot twist, you two fucked each other
My wife likes sex to last 45 min or so she will literally stop so she doesn't cum.. (her orgasm is intense so she only does it once) kinda fucking annoying , so we fuck in a few positions and finish in the ass if she makes it to that point if not she just sucks me off.
File: its_raping_time.png (23 KB, 391x447) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
23 KB, 391x447
Was tutoring this chick in math at my place, but it was just an excuse both of us had to spend time with each other. Took a break from that and started drawing since we were in the same art classes together. I don't remember how it started but we began making out and slowly feeling each other up. That's when she whispered in my ear "I want you... right now." Ended up dating for a long time, but eventually broke up.

Honestly, the sex was probably terrible but it's still my favorite.
Wouldn't mind honestly. After going to a rancid whore. My standards went down to anything i can put my dick in except animals
File: 1378684074109.jpg (138 KB, 720x960) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
138 KB, 720x960
>be 15
>first time doing meth
>do some meth with white trash girl from school
>she is 6/10
>run around spun out all day
>return to my house at night
>sneak her in
>make out and we both undress each other
>she gets on top
>slides my dick in
>we fuck for hours cuz meth
>I finish and kick her out before my parents wake up
>be 25 now, and regret the meth part
>overall experience 8/10
>number is blocked
>Things went better than expected

Good job anon
Girl on girl count?
Still kinda sad that you need to lie about that, sir

femlads are the best when they don't have shit personalities
8/10 nice story
only if you greentext it
Only with strap on

do you think it counts?
>Be me, 15 year old normal white kid
>Sister is 18 going through the underage drinking and weed smoking phase
>Sister has her friend come over to get drunk all the time
>Our mom is chill af
>Sisters friend is thick mixed chick(black/white) who tells my sister how cute I am all the time

You can see the shit being smeared by the toilet cleaning thing. Don't tell me you've never been in a pay bathroom before.
Travel a little anon, it's the little things that make the big differences.
You went to coles? Nah nah nah mate, shoulda used a milky way wrapper, or break a winnie blues box and wrap your willie in that. Its called being frugal mate.
no. Nobody is interested, you may as well just light your keyboard on fire.
Why the fuck would you post a greentext about losing your virginity in a virginity loss greentext thread? faggot.
tits or gtfo
I snuck out of my home at like 1am to visit a girl that i lived near, we fucked outside a church, then she moved cities because of family issues. thank fuck for that because shit between us got weird almost immediately. She's dating a close friend of mine right now and i dont know how i feel about that either
Yeah, unfortunately in my experience all the hottest of any sex or persuasion are either shallow to the point where you question their mental health, or completely fucking crazy/bipolar in some way.
This applies to the opposite end of the spectrum with landwhales and horribly misfired people as well.

depends, are you a 15 year old normal white kid lad or propane grill?
fellow ausfag, where you from?
>be me
>party with friend, neighbors and fam
>neighbors wife calling ny name
>anon you look strong .exe
>can you help me to get some more drinks out of our house
>she rides my benor
>sucked till i came
>came buckets in her mouth
>oh shit anon
>take on clothes
>get drinks
>go back to party
>she never talked again with me
>happy new year
Top kek
Women lie to you to make you feel better about your premature ejaculation problem anon.
That's what they do.

>if mother not home.
>asked to give blowjobs.
>"ill give you this".
>"ill buy you that".
>have bunch of toys.
>bratz dolls, barbies, etc.
>one day asked to get on top.
>"go like this".
>grinding motion on his penis.
>semen between my legs.
>learn about sperm.
>one day doing same thing
>it goes in.
>doesnt really hurt for soem reason.
>it happens again.
>if mother not home.
>sex happens.
>finally get older.
>tired of sex.
>dont want to do it no more.
>i tell him seriously.
>he backs off.
How old were you

nice fake story, pal.
not even interesting. 4/10
my first time was amazing...

>be 22
>meet 19 year old cutie
>we both work nights, so we meet up at 3 am
>hang out and chat for a few hours
>she invites me to her place
>sitting on her bed, kinda awkward, just playing with her cat and chatting for way too long
>she is not even being slightly flirty, but I decide that if I can at least get a kiss out of it, it will be a good night
>jokingly cuddling together, I eventually go in for a kiss
>she was totally ready for it, and started making out hard
>taking turns being on top or bottom, getting really hot
>reaching up her shirt, she doesnt seem to mind
>reaching down her pants, she doesnt mind that either
>finger her to orgasm while we make out
>this goes on for a long time
>take off her shirt, and get a good handful of tits
>I've been hard for hours at this point, finally pull it out
>she notices and smiles, and I start jerking it
>she reaches down and does it for me
>not doing so well, but its awesome anyway
>I decide this has been going on for a while, I guess I will just try to finish myself off now
>for some reason, cant cum. blue balls and urge to pee preventing it
>take off all my clothes, notice she is doing the same
>was not expecting it to get this far, but get on top of her
>finally insert into her and make her cum within a few minutes
>she pushes me on my back and rides me for another 5 minutes until I am about to cum
>I get her off and finish on myself
>she giggles and says "I am on the pill, it would have been okay"
>clean up, say goodbye, and head home, after 3 hours of this

This was only a month ago. I really want to keep in contact, but she is going through some depression and never wants to talk or meet up... I would give anything for another night like that
kek that's awesome, also seems like the most real story on here.
Bullshit. Fuck of neckbeard.

>Weeks of sisters friend coming over every weekend, getting drunk, high and hanging out
>They get me high for first time
>Then drunk for first time(separate occasions)
>Sister friend starts telling my sister more about how she likes me
>Fast forward, middle of week
>Tell sis I wanna lose my virginity, ask if mixed chick would be down
>Sis laughs but lines it up
>Mixed chick totally down
>Weekend comes
>Sis, sis friend, and me start drinking e&j
>sis friend gets drunk
>Time to pass out comes
>I'm nervous af
>Sister asks if she's gonna sleep in my room or her room
>Mixed chick laughs and blushes and acts like she don't want to

Like a faggot

send a gift basket of carrots to her
just carrots
carrots to keep the depression away
healthy eating, healthy mind

were you expecting porn?
And homeopathy is a legitimate medical practice... fucking liberals..
I do didn't

big pharma is taking ur money to give u pills that give u autism and also cancer so u keep buying pills
And let me guess, our sharp teeth are not for meat?
To bad the "natural" alternative costs more then the real deal. Liberal cuck

humans r only supposed to eat leaves n shit thats why you never see other primates eat meat except for when they kill small animals or eat insects that's because they're vegan like you're supposed to be
you're also not supposed to drink milk even though all mammals produce milk and feed it to their young ur not supposed to actually consume it
File: 1474542060731.png (1 MB, 1141x1277) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
1 MB, 1141x1277
I was raped by the class bully and three of his goons in the school changing room because I was feminine and everyone else had reached puberty and I stupidly decided to keep long hair.

I was in grade 8. I decided I was into it but pretended not to. Constantly bent over in front of them and started wearing feminine clothes. They fucked me all through grade 8.

Pic related. I kinda looked like that but with Black but short hair and wore pink t shirts and tiny black tight shorts all the time.
Hurry up
i'm sorry i'd have to bang the end result on the right tbh
>tell girl I am a trap
>be feminine guy
>attract bi girl
>get her to do my makeup
>tell her "make me as hot as you can"
>once she is done, I say "do I look hot?"
>she pounces on me and we go for it
I wish I could fuck you. Anymore stories? Did anyone else fuck you?
To two Pringles potato chips taped together so they look like a duck's beak. It was then filled with motor oil.

I was given a Benedryl so i was groggy. I don't remember much after that, when my babysitter ran after me naked making quacking noises. I was only 7 and she was 22. I kinda came to and she said congrats your a man now. My little dick felt wierd and sore but oddly satisfied.
"All the women I've talked to", just coz you've chatted to some chicks randomly over time doesn't equate to knowing what every girl wants lol, not every chick is the same, some would love to get fucked for hours on end, not their fault if you can't provide them with that luxury lol
My uncle used to lick my face all over and made me hug and kiss him alot. His son would graphics my ass or dry hump me as a result.

Almost my whole class had some sort of sexual encounter with me. I guess you could say I was the class bitch.
*Grab my ass
So... still angry about your daddy?

no because the story is fake bruh hahaha
You are what's wrong with the world I hope you know that

Thinks liberal education is education
Thinks art is relevant
Thinks there are more then 2 genders
Believes in astrology
Overly religious
Unwilling to work
Likes reality tv
Follows famous people's life's
Vegan or vegetarian
"Green or organic "
Likes magazines
Scared of firearms
Likes Hillary
This list could be a long one...

im indifferent.
Some daddy issues? Attracted by older guys?
>overly religious

try again buddy you got the wrong wing
>19 yo
>anxous/10, was just learning how to have friends
>get a love note from a girl from my previous school
>we meet up, go to a movie, I visit her at her place her place for a week or two
>eventually stay the night over, getting hot and heavy
>convinces her to take her panties off
>awkwardly fuck her for in missionary for 20 minutes, everytime I build up speed, she tells me to slow down
>not allowed to look, room had to be pitch black
>not allowed to touch anything
>eventually tells me to stop because she wants to go to bed
>2 days later try again, same stuff
>decide to just stop it as soon as she cums
>being an anxious fuck, I stop replying to her more and more
>breaks up with me 2 weeks later

Pretty much given up on relationships at this point
File: thedarklord.jpg (61 KB, 535x521) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
61 KB, 535x521

>likes hillary
Yes, of course i like Ms.Clinton, why would anyone not like such a charming and strong independant woman? She should be the president of the United States for life she's just so qualified...
Just listing things wrong with the world most are related to liberals not all.
Escort. Also, the only time I have had sex. About $300 for an hour. I also gave her anal so all and all not regretting the experience. I think I am too autistic to get a grill to fuck irl and I just turned 25.

none. im normal. just not interested in sex. been doing it for too long.
>I leave to my room
>20 mins pass and there's a knock on my door
>Sisters friend smiling slutty and drunk
>Tell her to come in
>She sits on bed, tells me to turn off lights
>Tells me to come to bed next to her
>I do
>Still nervous af
>I'm kinda fake laughing to kill the awkward silence
>She asks if I have any music
>Puts on slowjam mix volume 2(bunch of rnb music that I know her and my sister were really into)
>She tells me to turn off lights, i do so
>Me and her are sitting on bed next to each other, in dark, slow jams playing
>She tells me to "Come here"
>Darkasfuck.jpg (can't see shit)
>I lean closer to her direction
>She meets me halfway
>Start making out, sloppy as fuck
>Bout two minutes into the kissing, I start grabbing tits outside of shirt
>She takes shirt off
>I unsnap the bra one handed
> just been doing it to long

Yeah that's normally why people don't have sex... what the fuck? Anon

>Start sucking on titties
>A few minutes pass, we both get fully naked and start making out again on bed
>I finger her pussy for a little bit before going down on her
>I eat the hell out of the pussy, she spasms
>Afterwards she tells me to lay down, I do so
>She then starts sucking my dick, soft af btw
>Still nervous af btw
>I'm basically doing shit I've seen in porn
>She sucks me til I get hard
>Reposition for missionary
>Get soft again before I can get dick in pussy
>She sucks me again
>I get hard, switch up again
>This time I get in that soaking wet hole
>We fuck for about 10 minutes then i pull out and nut on bed, like where her ass cheeks are
>Feel good af, start making out with her again
>Get hard again
>I slide back into that pussy with ease
>Fuck for another 30 minutes, she cums, i nut inside her
>Afterwards we lay down and cuddle and pass out
>Next day was awkward until she went home
>I told everybody about it during the next week, proud af
>She ends up coming over the next weekend and we do it again
>After that I didn't have much interest with her. I think she was getting too attached because I was fucking her good. Like I gave it my all.

Ended up ignoring her for awhile and her and my sisters friendship kinda got fucked up over the whole. It was still good pussy though and I'll never forget it. I could probably her up now, ten years later and still get some cooch.

been giving blowjobs since i can remember. sex loses its appeal.
I doing it for longer then you and never bored about it....
Asexual? Or maybe you just need an other kink.. you tried out some bdsm?

sex is a chore to me. like washing dishes. im not interested in it.
That's sad... sorry for you.
You have a bf? I suppose not or sn other asexual ... ever made a therapie for this?

tell some more quality jokes

i have a good friend that knows i dont like sex but i know it will come up. i'd rather be single. men always crave sex.
I have ate shit tons of pussy don't even like to and fucking is still great (I'm 30)

this is one of THOSE kind of girls
The same way i learned how to ride a bike.

>With my dad holding me from behind
We want that little wet musky hope between yo legs shanty. Give it up
I had sex with a South Korean hooker, It was fun 10/10 would do again.
Ah so a sexist feminist man hater, why not just get a girlfriend?
I forget exacrly. Basically somehow i learned that if i cupped my balls and laid on the floor i could orgasm by dry humping my wrist in that position. I would just cum in underwear and let it dry.

im not a feminist. i just dont like sex. its like a chore. for a good part of my life, it was a chore.
Oh you're so fucking Murican it hurts, what is it with Americans and being so scared/stuck up about sex? It's always Muricans.

read here: >>707316487

Ever tried to do it with a girl ? Do you even masturbate?
>start talking to old friend on fb
>sweet talk her
>one day go to party
>she comes over after party
>commence to both losing our virginity

6 years later we still occasionally fuck, she has a bf to
There are lots of women who don't like sex because they have never had good sex. Do you ever orgasm?

i dont like girls.
Puritans came over from England to escape religious persecution, ended up pushing their religion onto everyone in their colony, their ideals ended up spreading and that's why Merica is more decent when it comes to sexual relations
This is how I almost got laid. I've told this story before, btw

>be me
>just got out of friendzone with chick i’d known for a while
>finally on a date with her after 3 years
>she and I are walking around bored
>ask her what she wants to do
>tells me to follow her
>okay cool i guess?
>takes me to a forest
>suddenly pushes me on the ground
>making out
>feels good man
>she unbottons my jeans
>literally stop
>’what’s going on’ i say
>i’m so out of it i don’t even comprehend what she’s doing
>she pauses
>’well i mean, i was gonna suck you off’
>oh i guess
>first time getting sucked and i say ‘oh cool’, holy shit
>when she sees my dick she says ‘aw, it’s so cute and small’
>not the reaction i’d hoped for
>looked kinda weirded out but whatever
>felt amazing, but an hour earlier i rubbed one out, i couldn’t get hard
>30 minutes later she’s still sucking and i’m soft as fuck
>awkwardly gives up
>try eating her out
>oh lordie it tastes like fish wtf
>actually gag, on her pussy, bump head into her chest and she falls back
>head hits mud
>fast forward 10 minutes, trying to find something to help clean her
>i grab some leaves and rub them in her hair
>looks even worse holy fuck
>she’s pissed
>ask her if she wants to stop for a coffee and whatever because i thought this was a good idea
>she fucking facepalms
>never spoke to her again
So you don't want kids I suppose. ..
you mean that obviously fake story?
I was 17 we were at the beach, this 19y old girl thought I wasn't a virgin, we fucked right in the water.

It lasted barely 30 seconds.

We stayed together for a while though so it wasn't too an hero.jpg

yes. i used to orgasm. but it wasnt that. it was just being constantly asked for sex that got annoying. like eating too much sweets.
not relevant, you Muricans are always stuck up about sex and there is always an excuse. Every Murican girl I have ever been with is like that for some reason, or they just lay there and take it because they don't know what to do. This is not the case for English,German, S.Korean, Thai, ect. It's just Mericans and you always have an excuse, kek I swear it's in the Murican hand book or something.

how would anyone prove anything here?
Yeah you get sic, then you wait a few days and buy the same candy bar... you are full of shit.
my younger, but physically bigger cousin fucked me. I wore my sister's g-string while he did it.
I'd count that as getting laid. Just failing hard at it too.

That is a relative term my friend, Americans are the most stuck up people I have ever met when it comes to sex or they just don't know what they're doing.
22, anal with my boyfriend. He got a little rough, but it was amazing. He came inside.

is everyone always this angry around here?
I didn't put my dick in her pussy, so I don't think it comes close to counting. All i did was eat out the chum bucket embodied and got my limp dick sucked.
i didn't really know what other term to use for the it
decent, humble, sensitive, etc. all kinda work
P in V

no. kids are annoying.
Sounds more like you are doing it for the wrong reasons then... have you ever done it wit someobe you were actually in love with? Also, why would you just do it with any friends who ask?
File: angry.png (12 KB, 631x470) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
12 KB, 631x470
m or f?

either way, cousin on cousin is hot
gay cousin on cousin while one is wearing girl clothes is obviously superior, though
no I meant that it only relates to you, you same decent but others would say stuck up.

it wasnt friends. it was my father.
i really don't know what you mean by stuck up
that's gonna last like 1 second and then it will be drier than ever before
it was a lie is what it was, my guy
I'm male, was 13. He was a year younger but twice my size. He had a weird dick, very curved.
Was never with a guy since.
I didn't.
>be me
>be 16
>first kiss like a month prior
>not well know fact to me was, that i don't look that shabby, thought i was a 5/10, am a 7-8/10 in reality
>meet 2 girls when i was out drunk with a friend
>talk to them shit, was wasted as fuck
>forget about her
>2 weeks later
>on my way home from some party or something like that
>girl behind me says hi
>i'm like "wot", didn't notice it was her
>started talking, she had a shit night, i take her home
>we meet eachother like 2-3 times, 3rd time seeing eachother i get her to drop the pantys(it was in a tippy from some kindergarden shit thing)
>i eat her out, she sucks me a little (using teeth a little, so i'm like "nah, let's just do it"
> i lie down, she gets on top of me
>fucking ground was made out of wood pieces, no idea what they are called
>piercing my ass as she sits ontop of me
>i bust a nut
>feel like who cares if she came or not, was quite a dick back then
>drop her like a hot potato 2 weeks later
>got quite some shit for that though
Only when people are full of shit
........Go back to class anon.
Alright, first time with a giy, or with a chick?
>Love sending her home full of my cum
that's not how a 40 year old woman's body works, virgin storyteller
should greentext
Whichever is the most gay

i've posted my picture here before, but its always the same. the moment you bring up the fact you're a female you have to somehow validate it. then you're asked for nudes. its like you're all teenagers. or stuck in your teenager years.
wood chips are the words you're looking for
>Be <age redacted>, been seeing qt3.14 who is 5 years younger than me for a few years, never done anything though.
>Over at mutual friend's house.
>Go hide in van.
>She keeps telling me she wants it, etc.
>Ask her like 30 times if she's sure it's okay.
>Put on condom.
>Get her wet and try to get it in. Can't find hole in dark cause virgin. She has to help guide it in.
>Finally get it in. Have trouble staying hard because never worn condom before.
>Cum after about 20 minutes.
>Ask her if she enjoyed it, she said she did but she's practically crying.
>"Did it hurt?"
>"No, I'm happy." she says.
>Cuddle her all night in van.

7 years later, still with her. Everyone else including mutual friend's parents still pissed about this. Feels weird, but shit all they can do about it now.
With my first and only real girlfriend at 21.
Wood chips...
I was watching my dog whilst my father was out of the country for 1 day working (from 5am-8am the next day). So this girl I had been snapchatting with for a while, I hit her up and tell her she should come over (10Miles From her to me), She said she had no ride, so I told her to walk and I will meet her half way. Took my dog with me so my dog would be tired so we wouldn't be bothered. We get to my house we go to the sofa and I start a movie, really akward for about 5 minutes then i tell her we should go have sex and we do (in my dads bed), Lasted about 45 Minutes, Cummed on her stomach boobs and face, we go to sleep and i walk her to the bus in the morning. It was nice.
Boo fucking hoo
Did she ever tell you why she was crying?
don't give a shit bout your nudes, just don't tell a highly unrealistic story without at least the smallest amount of proof that you're even the gender you say you are
> be 21yo version of me
> find that 31yo girl in a videogame
> whispered in chat for 1,5 hours
> she wanted to exchange pictures
> she was 1,65m, long black hair, looked like 24, green-grey eyes, big tits and ass, curvy, not chubby or fat,
> she called me cute (using a word you call little dogs and cats)
> ...
> she lived 1 hour via car away and me, the cute dog, would have no change
> next day she wanted to talk dirty on the phone while we masturbate to each others sounds. felt strange
> visited her 3 days later on friday and stayed till sunday
> mfw i already came multiple times and my balls started to hurt and she told me about 3 costumes she has in her closet.

police costume, housemaid and the third one i cant remember, because we just used the other two. 10/10
My wife cries sometimes when she cums, I think it messes with some girls hormones.
>highly unrealistic story

lol. stop masturbating to porn.
hey hey hey... TITS OR GTFO
you're an anon, not a femanon, there are no femanons, there are just anons, who cares about the Kids here
with the age redacted part and the everyone being pissed, sounds like she was underaged
you naughty anon, you
With my first GF when i was 14, she was 16. We did it when we had the house for ourselves. It took about 35-40 minutes, and a minute later I stole her moms bottle of vodka and went to a party without her. Feel pretty bad looking back at it, tho...
Not a teenager here.. just interrested in your storie and your answers are not faked it seams , even if.. its more interresting as most of the other post here... how old are you now?
No prob dude, my gf is 4 years younger than me, noone batts an eye, apart of me i guess
sometimes shes just so fucking slow
Got my first girlfriend, she finally sucked my wiener. One day she finally slipped a rubber on my wiener and let me stick it in her vagina over and over until I busted a nut.
>be sixteen
>dating girl for a month
>house to myself after school
>she comes over
>tell her I want her to be my first
>she wants it too
>go upstairs and get naked
>start fucking
>I get really into it
>pull her hair
>hair comes off
>holy shit she's wearing a wig
>she starts crying
>I cum
>now I have a fetish for bald crying girls

lmao so fake.

look at how pixelated the boys birth marks are. the girl on the left is actually a girl.

1/10 shop.

Was 15 years old, freshman in highschool. Dated GF for 6 months prior, finally let me shove it in inside her hot tub. Her mom walks out to see if we are okay, little did she know I have 7 inches inside of her daughter. Feels good man.
legit made me laugh 9/10 story
>be 13
>cousin sleeps over
>I'm very skinny, he is a bit chubby and twice my size
>we play starcraft brood war whole night
>after 12 a.m. german porn commercials start
>we both jack off
>he has a "big" curved dick
>he says something like "wouldn't it be great to have a blow job"
>I drop on my knees and suck him off, he jerks mine
>He says he want's to put it in.
>I go to my sister's room and steal her panties, black g-string
>I put them on and get on top of him, reverse cowgirl
>we have no idea what we are doing. we go dry
>hurts like a mother fucker
>he cums in 30 seconds
>cum lubes me up
>he continues to fuck, this time around 5 minutes
>hurts until he cums again
>he goes to the bathroom to clean himself up
>my ass is sore, bleeding, and feels empty
>mfw I want more dick
>in the morning I suck him in the bathroom
>I play it straight and I like chicks but I want dick ever since.
You still see him ? Ever told your mom about it? No pressure from your family to marry and have kids?
>be me
>14 yr emo shit
>a friend of mine wanted to hang out late night
>friend is girlfriend of guitarist in my band (still is)
>said hell yes and rushed out my window
>met up and chilled at a local kindergarden
>walked to the closest gasstation to buy some shit
>met a friends father on his way to a local pub
>him drunk as fuck asked if we wanted to join
>said why not
>waited for him outside as he brought us beer
>Drank it and bailed
>she is a lightweight
>found an old phonebooth and decided to fuck around with it
>ended up with us making out inn it while i foundled her
>we moved on to a football field
>started to make out again
>fucked like animals
>found out afterwards i took her virginity
>Her boyfriend never found out
She said it was kind of just an overflow of emotions at that point. The whole thing was ridiculously emotional for both of us, for a lot of reasons.

I think the biggest reason for her was that her shitface of a stepfather had been raping her since she was like 9 or 10. She said 'finally getting to choose to do it with someone she wanted' made her very happy.
The whole situation was fucked up.

I've still got that fucker on a short list of people I know that death is too good for. His life will eventually be reduced to shit, and then maybe he'll kill himself.
That's the only way we'll be happy with the outcome. The legal system already threw the case out that I handed them on a fucking silver platter, and instead let that cock sucker and his family smear my name and all through the mud.
Should try and fuck Gail Porter. That bald cunt is always crying about something
>You still see him ?

i dont see him and never told anyone. im not interested in creating more problems. my mother sometimes brings up family but she knows im not interested. so she leaves me alone for the most part.
>Be me
> 17 years old working at a summercamp
> On a trip between.the first and second sessions of camp
> Been trying to get laid all summer
> Been fooling around a bit with a guy who was down to experiment, but we haven't done more than handsy stuff, and a bit of moutb play.
> In a situationship with a girl who has a reputation as a massive whore
> She acts like she is super innocent, and keeps leaving me with blue balls.
> One night, she and I are making out for a long time. I go in to grab her tits with one hand, but she won't let me.
> she starts stroking my cock over my jeans while we kiss.
What about if a guy went down on you every time, and was good at it?
>be me, 16 and just lost all beta weight
>lost braces
>meet one of more sluttier girls in grade
>interested in me for sexual purposes
>aw yis
>fingering and making out, nothing big for a few months.
>junior prom, she goes with someone else and offers her friend
>do jr. prom, shit is boring, we all leave and go to girls house to drink liquor.
>everyone passes out, girl climbs on top of me
>somehow grabs my dick by going in my shirt
>walks me upstairs to a bedroom in girl's house
>lays back on bed
>"get naked anon, now"
>strip like that scene in bruce almighty
>lick her once or twice, tastes bitter
>shove dick in
>fuck like dogs for few minutes, notice immense levels of wetness
>immense autism sets in
>she starts pulling me in more, I try and kiss her
>she parries me
>ask where I can come on her
>she says fill her up
>I drop 16 years of unleaded cumbuckets in her 16 year old pussy
>we go back downstairs soon after, try to be lowkey
>she put her pants on backwards, we smell like sex
>gg autism

did you ever enjoy sex at all?
request delivered. 10/10 thanks for the story anon
Tits or gtfo
Hope that you are socially activ... and not an otaku who browse /b/ day and night

probably not. i'd just lay there and get bored.


yes. when it was a novelty and the feelings were new.
sorry for the lack of steam, was in a hurry

>yes. when it was a novelty and the feelings were new.

So, how did you get to not liking it?

im normal. i just dont like sex.


imagine every time your mother steps out of the house you are asked for oral sex or to have sex. now picture that for years.
I lost my virginity to a prostitute in Amsterdam at the age of 24. Was very awkward and not particularly pleasant. Didn't manage to ejaculate despite going at it for a good half hour.

Sad as it was it probably was a good decision as I felt confident enough afterwards to engage in relationships. I've been in a relationship for three years now. Definitely wouldn't pay for sex again though.
I was 26, she was 16, it was my birthday and she came to my place to pick me up for a surprise party she made at her parents place, with some friends and family. I touched her breast and she cried, but then it all happened. We didn't use protection. Shit was cash.
cool, keep that attitude an things will change. go fuck yourself, nobody will help you. self deprecate and stew in your misery
So basically you are blaming your inability to be interested in anyone for any length of time, on sex... how about to just go have casual sex with new people... will be new and you don't have to commit to anyone
I was eleven years old, she was ten. Children should not fuck.
post picture holding paper that has date on it
> I don't like sex
> I'm normal.

Sorry anon you are not normal.

how do i delete private information from the picture?
What the fuck... do you have you SSN tattooed on your face?
>Be me
>14 yrs old on vacation
>all inclusive hotel, got a wristband from a dude that left, only given out to adults so they can order alcohol
>order drinks for me and my friends
>feel like a champ
>we're all wasted
>blonde chick comes up to me and we make out
>she was 17 and experienced
>no clue why she picked me, I was looking like a fucking child
>get another drink and head towards a small forest
>we continue making out and she grabs my dick
>I kissed girls before but that was new
>she noticed that i was nervous and told me to just let her do her thing
>goes down on her knees and sucks me off
>she undressed herself and told me to get on the ground
>sits on top of me, inserts my dick in her pussy
>after a minute of her riding me a fucking cockroach ran over my chest
>reminder: we were in the woods in turkey
>we both screamed, she stood up and ran away in complete panic
>I'm confused, searched for her
>she was turned off
>we went back to the other people and continued drinking
>fucked her again a few days later
>never met her since
>first time, got cockblocked by a cockroad in a turkish forest
>still profit I guess?

Not a good writer, sorry /b/ros
Take a screenshot and upload the screenshot
MS Paint and then use selector tool to delete the stuff you don't want in it
Kek if true double Kek
>a cockroach ran across my chest
>we were in the woods in turkey

holy shit, some guy just came up and stepped on your chest?
Classic murican, everythings about you and you have such a great story, god i hate people like you.
Shit happens in shit world
File: 1475950705567.jpg (18 KB, 617x416) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
18 KB, 617x416
I haven't...
>have gf
>uncut dick skin too tight cant fuck
>tons of handjobs blowjobs eating her out
>she loves pain i love causing pain
>get cut
>she sits on my dick cowgirl style
>lose v

>have tons of sex
>anal too
>sometimes i go soft in middle of sex
>im bored of her
>fight a lot
>she kisses i guy
>i break up immadeatly

what's with the random numbers
supposed to be credit card info or something?
honestly just waiting to see if supposed 30 y/o with daddy issues actually posts picture
>be me, 21years old.
>get drinks with co-workers
>around 3am only a female co-worker is with me anymore
>she wants me to walk her to a bus station so she can get home
>she is incredibly slow, misses the last bus
>asks to wait at my place for the first bus of the morning
>ok what ever, get to my place, i start playing wow and tell her she can sleep on the couch
>goes in to my bed instead
>i still dont get what shes after
>keep doing a couple of heroics
>get tired, must sleep but theres a drunk girl in my king-size bed, eww..
>try to slip in and sleep, she is awake, says 'finally' and slips her hand in my pants, shes soaking wet and without clothes
>this isnt how i imagined my first time.. shit.. have to stick it in, had trouble getting it up since i didnt really expect this. i also cant refuse since it would be rude, i hate being rude
>i last about 30 seconds, shes disappointed, im just happy to have gotten over it and get some sleep

Thats how I lost my virginity. I'm 29 now and have not sexed anyone else, never wanted to either. I am a hetero sexual but I guess i have a low sex drive.
>I'm 29 now and have not sexed anyone else, never wanted to either. I am a hetero sexual but I guess i have a low sex drive.
More then low... inexistent it seams...
You're a weird dude

jesus christ, my guy

>be 16
>at a party
>some fat chick wants me but i dont want her
>got drunk
>still dont want
>its a sleepover party and the only place i can sleep is the 2 person bed where she sleeps
>"No thanks, ill just sleep on this bench outside"
>she convinces me to sleep inside
>its happening
>suddenly hear faint laughing
>some friends are peeking through the door
>that for years.
At least you had more sex then most of the guys here on /b/
She didn't want it and didn't expected that you raped here suppose. ..
that's pretty funny
what a romantic story
> be 23
> she quite nice
> things starts to get hot
> cold city
> first time completely naked with someone
> too cold for me, am too excited and confuse
> no sex
> :(
> after some time we try again
> go to her family strange apartment
> no one lives there, it's just a junk storehouse
> get in bed
> i start to sneeze
> it's so dusty there i can't stop
> water comes out of my eyes
> no sex
> :(
> she does blow me sometimes, she's not very good but still fun
> and i even eat her out
> i do love her
> we try again, i think, still not working.

> than, one friday night, about three months since we started dating, she's at my room
> we talk about sex and i tell her i don't know, and i'm sorry, i really want to but it scares me
> i cry
> she's cute and supporting
> we go to sleep
> day after, it's satursday noon
> we talk about cosplay, so i show her this wonderful dress i wore once
> she tries it on, it's a bit tight on her chest because she has wonderful big soft breast, which i don't have since i'm a guy
> i hug her
> we start making out
> we have sex
> it's not that scary or difficult as i thought
> it's almost a bit disappointing: that's all? just this?
> it's still pretty amazing
> and fun
> when she's on top she tells me she just came
> in hindsight maybe she lied to make me fill good, maybe not, i'm not sure
> anyhow it was nice of her

Yeah, basically i got raped by a fat chick with my friends watching
I burned the ribs.
>Be my 12-year-old self.
>My best friend's sister, an 11-year-old girl, becomes interesting.
>Have my first sex ed class.
>Try to go and kiss her. She's curious too.
>We meet in their large backgarden.
>Make out like I think adults do.
>We agree to try more of it.
>Go into their supply shed.
>She undresses, I do as well.
>Try to put it in, it doesn't go smooth.
>She says she's in pain, but it's too late.
>I broke that hymen.
>Moving around like a drunk fish, continue until I feel the good feel.
>Came without actual cum.
>We are a couple for a week or two, then break up over some child bullshit.
>She never told anyone.
>She became a huge slut.

Not even my wife knows about this.
what is your first language?
man that really sucks
i hope you didn't get scarred for life or a broken hip from her sitting on you
My dad was drunken. He return home, and cought me with gay porn. He fucked me 3 times, and fall to dream.
>riding bike
>guy screaming
>conversation or movie or tv on can't tell
>i dont like finding spiders in my apartment
why would your wife know about that?
Some men tell their spouses about stuff like that, but I just assumed it would be difficult to explain.
fake and super gay
>Be me 19 yo
>Find a girl who's awfully in love with me
>Not so ugly so "why not?"
>Fuck her
>30 seconds after i'm finished
>Marry her
>20 years later, hang on 4chan searching for p0rn
File: 1465725437538.jpg (46 KB, 575x630) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
46 KB, 575x630
rather not say. why? because of the broken english?
nah, the whole curious kids cliche doesn't seem hard to explain
>I lost it at 22 with my 18 year old gf.
>We're both interested in economics, and we surfed together
>in an MMM early retirement style forum.
>She opened a thread, I answered her and sent some signals.
>She picked up on it, and we started to talk in PM's.
>That same night we went from the forum to texting over the phone and set our first date.
>We've been to 2 dates. She decided to reject me.
>I was kinda disappointed, but moved on and cut her loose.
>She kept coming back for my company. We kind of opened up about sexuality to each other.
>She changed her mind and proposed a 3rd date.
>That night, we've decided to pair up and become exclusive.
>Things escalated quickly, and a month later we both had sex for the 1st time.
>She bled and all, but we were satisfied to be over with it.
>We're still together and we have amazing sex.
The Circle of Life
I got a hearty kek out of that for some reason. Thanks anon
>be 13
>she 14
>ex of a friend
>current gf
>went to her house
>got intimate
>repeat the same till this day

What the fuck did you expect?
"Hey, do you remember that girl you met when we met my childhood friend. I smashed her pussy at age twelve."

She would be all to exited.
Though, girlfriend since four years
>hang on 4chan searching for p0rn
There are better places then 4chan for porn..

Fake story
Why have you never told your wife?
File: implying.png (48 KB, 500x500) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
48 KB, 500x500
Sex in the missionary position for the sole purpose of procreating.
Nah, you just have to be cuddling or something gay like that and be like "hey so what was your first time" and then she tells you some boring story and then you tell her your story and boom that's it and maybe you fuck afterwards
Do you still just do 30 seconds?
>barely 16
>gf 15
>in my studing room
>grandma in the next room so must be silent
>dont want to leave any blood on the floor
>bends over on desk
>lets me backdoor
>i use some vazeline and go all in
nice story, how old were you at that time?
like....the first line says he was 18...
well, it's not a european language, but that's not the reason. it's (mostly) intentional, i like broken english.
>Be 22
>A few months ago
>Talk to a cute chinese waitress at an asian restaurant
>She gives me her number we start hanging out
>She doesn't have a car because she's working abroad
>I drive her to her house a few times and we hang out in her room
>After a couple of times we have sex
>Woah this is weird
>Have sex in a room in my parent's bed and breakfast
>She tells me its funny that my parents are encouraging us since she could never tell anyone about this in China
>Keep having sex regularly, she comes back to my hometown to visit new york and sleep in my bed with me for a week
>We cuddle hard as fuck; always intertwined at night
>Condom breaks once, freak out and buy the pill for her
>Genius idea -- I'll buy lube so that doesn't happen
>Condom slips off and I cum inside
>Freak the fuck out again and drive to a black neighborhood to find a wal mart
>Doesn't have it. Surprise Surprise.
>Cvs doesn't have it
>Next Cvs doesn't seem to have it but I ask if they have any in stock because fml right now
>They have one behind the counter
>Saved and not mugged even though I'm wearing vineyard vines and driving a white audi convertible
>When we dropped her off at the airport we cried.
>This lasted like 2 months. It was good -- I like asians and never had a summer fling. She loved the sex
>We even tried anal but she was too small
Her shoes fit inside mine. Can't complain
a mostly international non-european language
i'm thinking Chinese or Japanese.
>be 15 year old fuckboi
>have everyone around me losing their virginity
>wanks my heart out until i have a (girl)friend who feels pity for me
>sneaks out of house at 1am because i know she lives near me
>fuck outside a church (ironic bc my family is extremely religious)
>walks off
>shit gets weird almost immediately
>she moves cities bc her dads complete psycho
>3 years later
>she starts dating one of my friends
>he completely roasts both of us because he knows that we fucked outside a church
>contemplate my life and their relationship
>She was 13
>Told me she wanted to 'fool around'
>Took off her MLP panties
>Slid inside her
>Tard wrangler forgot something and came back to the classroom.
Still awaiting trial.
a rich white guy fucks a tiny asian?
i dunno....sounds kinda fake
nahh, tho reminding myself of it does help me last longer
Yeah. It's cause the broken English.
what did your friends do?
what website?
>nice thread
Well I'm 22 so that's not the greatest thing in the world. Here's us with my cousin and mom
Thread replies: 323
Thread images: 27

Navigation: /b/ - Random [Archive] | Search | [Home]
Navigation: /b/ - Random [Archive] | Search | [Home]

If you need a post removed click on it's [Report] button and follow the instruction.
If you like this website please support us by donating with Bitcoins at 16mKtbZiwW52BLkibtCr8jUg2KVUMTxVQ5
All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective parties. Images uploaded are the responsibility of the Poster. Comments are owned by the Poster.
This is a 4chan archive - all of the content originated from that site. This means that RandomArchive shows their content, archived. If you need information for a Poster - contact them.