ITT: Post desired superpower, others reply with a condition to make it worthless.
>>705392369
Forgot to tell mine
Time travel.
The ability to destroy energy
>>705392536
2 seconds in either direction
>>705392565
Only when there's no power
The ability to get laid
>>705392536
Forward only, no multiverse
>>705392565
But not the ability to survive the release. You will have to be at a safe distance, but you must be watching your target.
Mine is
>>>/t/heabilitytobluetext
>>705392536
Can only go forwards
>>705392565
The more energy you destroy the less years you have to live
For my super power I'll choose fireproof skin that allows me to manipulate and produce fire at will
>>705392565
Only when you're exausted
>>705392990
on your bed
>>705393043
>For my super power I'll choose fireproof skin that allows me to manipulate and produce fire at will
no fireproof eyes, you must close them if you wanna use your superpower daredevil
>>705392990
Ejaculates razor blades.
>>705393043
But only when you're under water
>>705393223
Ejaculates fire ants.
Immunity to everything
>>705393034
U cheeky cunt
>>705393299
But you must hold your breath
Can control all liquids
>>705393299
Immune to living
>>705393043
But only underwater
>>705393412
Whatever, i would be immune to death
>>705393299
Including oxygen
Ability to never give a fuck about anything
the ability to make my dream woman a reality and nothing bad to happen to either of us or our families and friends
Stoping time for a few seconds, increases duration as long as I live
>>705393481
When gargling cum
>>705393299
cannot lose virginity
>>705393629
but only while taking a shit
>>705393591
Paradox then
>>705393299
Except for "Reply to this post or your mother dies in her sleep" posts
>>705393643
But something awful happens to everyone else. Ability to be healthy
>>705393629
But you only when youre next to obama
>>705393643
But you'll never be able to have an erection
>>705393683
Since time has stopped you can't do anything. Not even move yourself. If you attempted to move, you would be moving at infinity m/s and hence any friction or drag would also be infinite.
>>705393481
But attract solids as you use it.
>>705393629
Stays virgin forever
>>705393643
But then you wake up
>>705393683
But you age twice as fast when cooling time
>>705393629
Except your sex organs are removed and you will never get to fuck anything
>>705393789
i can live with that. they don't matter if they are not my family and friends or hers
I am the powerlevel 9000 healer. I heal through taking the injuries and illness of those I heal onto me and then using my wolwerine x1000 self healing ability to fix the mess.
>>705393481
except bodily fluids
constant orgasm, shitting and pissing leaves you nearly always shivering on the floor in shameful, malnourished ecstasy
>>705393034
Only for links that get you banned
>>705393299
But only during the point of orgasm
>>705393842
that falls under the category of nothing bad happening
>>705393916
Whatever, I don't give a fuck.
>>705393899
but that falls under nothing bad happening
>>705394016
>nothing bad happening
Thats a subjective term
>>705393936
Good luck getting food, any other resources or entertainment. At best you could live like a shitty peasant, working every hour just to have any kind of standard of life.
>>705393916
oh the irony
The ability to create shoe soles out of nothing, but they aren't very comfortable or in very good condition.
My amazing vision give me the ability to see à very long range
Ability to summon varieties of drugs from nothing
>>705394089
refer to
>>705394091
>>705393952
but you have to wait a year before your wolverine powers kick in.
>>705393952
You still feel the relevant pain and you're too much of a pussy to tolerate it.
>>705394109
falls under nothing bad happening
>>705393789
You're a black woman with 14 kids and no job or baby daddy.
>>705394186
But nothing closer than 50 feet
>>705394191
You're black and get arrested for dealing drugs.
>>705392727
Hmm, can it be repeated more than once? Because fuck yeah I'd go back right before a lottery and win myself some cash.
>>705394191
They're all laced with rat poison
>>705394166
One person dies with every sole, you cant decide who
>>705394186
But you cant still see the tip of my penis ;)
>>705394191
Only if you get addicted to all
>>705394216
my subjectivity in this case is the only thing that matters in the part of nothing bad happening
>>705393789
>Ability to be healthy
Dies from a car accident at the age of 38
>>705394364
>make lots of money
>kill drug heads at the same time
the ability to possess any person or persons for as long as you desire (they are totally conscious of this but powerless)
>>705394166
Thus creating environmental pressure to evolve a species of super-rats who find the shoes very comfortable, and they could give a rat's ass about the condition.
>>705393643
Nothing bad ever actually happens but you're always terrified deep down that it will
>>705394191
You can do is only when you're already high, and they are destroyed if you become sober
>>705394404
You have an inverted dick.
>>705394409
waking up from a dream isnt bad, bad will be never waking up.
Ya blow it
The ability to create fire from nothing and control/manipulate it.
>>705394494
They get to possess you at the same time
>>705394525
i can live with that
>>705394619
You can't comprehend the notion of "nothing" since you know about atomic structure.
>>705394619
only works underwater
>>705394619
You're not immune to fire.
>>705394578
it is not a dream though if nothing bad happens. you blew it
>>705394494
But you feel and horrendous permanent itch in the ass when doing so
>>705394544
The flesh is outside?
>>705394619
No fireproof skin
>>705394494
But you need to be near death
>>705393725
Nice joke, dude. Made me laugh.
The ability to get dubs whenever I want.
>>705394856
Nigga its just a game dont take it seriously, that shit will never happen to you, delusional fag
The power to be Hugh Hefner
>>705394924
no, the dick goes inwards, like that of an innie bellybutton
the ability to have a stando power
>>705395021
You're an impotent old man who's the butt of many a joke.
>>705394619
you become such an intolerable controlling dick head that you only spark gas hobs and get scared dickless at the sight of uncontrolled flames because "with great power comes great responsiblah blah"
The power to manipulate probability
If you think about this properly there isn't any way it could be bad
>>705395021
you get gangrene in your dick
>>705395177
You can only manipulate probability against your favour.
>>705394357
3 seconds charge time
>>705392369
the ability to pull guns from out of nowhere and shoot perfectly
The ability to shorten my dick by half every time I see a bird.
>>705394997
But only outside /b/
also check em
>>705395021
with the case of Benjamin Button.
>>705395051
How much do you really wanna see it?
>>705395072
But you cannot ora ora ora
>>705395177
Theres always a chance of failure, nothing is 100%.
>mfw both powers and condition are true in RL
>>705395177
if you happen to believe it works then it does not.
>>705395286
Only works while wearing a fedora and gay leather trench coat.
>>705395286
>shoot perfectly
to your own head
>>705395177
Murphys law/Sods law becomes dominant
>>705395381
Theres no limit on short
>>705394997
get insta banned and thread removed every time
the ability to give life (and then seduce) inanimate objects
>>705395641
Never said there was
>>705395651
>the ability to give life (and then seduce) inanimate objects
They will cuck you for sure, you cannot watch
>>705393591
But, if you hold your breath for too long, when you stop you'll suffocate
>>705395651
Midas-style you can't control it and everything you touch comes alive and gets so seduced it tries to rape you. Your clothes are constantly rubbing themselves against your dick. You can't sleep because your bed wants you so bad. Anything small enough that you touch tries to work its way into your anus.
The ability to get downs syndrome and always be happy
>>705395592
kek
Be able to manipulate atoms and re-form structures on a mass scale
>>705393591
The feeling of suffocation will make you breath again, independent if it hurts you or not.
>>705392990
Only fucks 2/10s
>>705396030
But you are not in this realm. You cannot be in this realm and yet can see it.
>>705395995
Someone not hypocrite will remind you everyday that you are a biological failure of human being.
>>705395995
You're taken advantage of every single day
>>705395962
lol this is great
the ability of metamorphosis into anything of your choosing whilst maintaining your own consciousness, and obvs return to whatever form whenever you want
>>705393643
Turns out dream woman is actually a controlling bitch but you can an hero because nothing bad can happen to your family
>>705396335
Doesn't matter, I'd always be a happy retard
>>705396611
you already are
>>705396335
>But you are not in this realm. You cannot be in this realm and yet can see it.
That doesn't sound like much of a downside. You're just a god that can't interact with their creation, which kinda sucks, but you're still a god
>>705392369
Eternal """PRIME""" youth and immortality.
>>705393952
You do all of this but yet still everyone hates you because you're a dick
>>705396477
Feminists constantly follow you and check your metamorphosis privilege
>>705396477
>the ability of metamorphosis into anything of your choosing whilst maintaining your own consciousness, and obvs return to whatever form whenever you want
You can only do it twice, both 2 days before your death
>>705394277
Enjoying your weekend, middle schooler?
>>705396729
but you have no sensory memory and thus are a totally useless vegetable
The ability to feel love
>>705396477
You need to see what you're transforming into everytime. You're blind
>>705397111
No one will ever return that love
>>705397111
Nobody loves you back
>>705396729
but you must look like a cyst
>>705393299
Because you're dead
>>705395284
kek
>>705397261
>>705397289
Who hurt you anons?
>>705395284
lulz
The ability to grant one wish
>>705392369
What the fuck, who made that bullshit, Rick and Morty should not even be compared to Dr who. Fucking faggot Dr who fans.
invisibility
>but you're always making the sound of an air horn
>>705397479
/b/ collectively decides the negative outcome of that wish
The ability to have perfect mental health
>>705397111
You feel the overwhelming urge to write awful songs about it on your acoustic guitar which you can't really play. Neither can you sing. You're constantly attempting to perform your songs in front of anyone you meet. You try to make them heartfelt but everyone just thinks they're gay.
>>705396919
metamorphose into your mother on the 1st and set off a fire extinguisher in your ass, metamorphose into the earth and live forever on the 2nd
>>705397151
metamorphose into nothing create universe
>>705397578
Wew lad
>>705394768
Kek
>>705397704
You'd create a black hole.
>>705397111
But there's no one to love
>>705397681
completely paralyzed
>>705397368
Obvious set up is obvious
>>705397578
everyone around you is doctor who cast and characters
being able to decimate anything standing before me ....with one punch
>>705397681
perfect mental health is a social construct, become epitome under foot figure and bend to the will of everyone you ever meet to fit their criteria
>>705397905
Wow you got me there buddy
>>705394494
all of their sexual organs disappear when you possess them
ability to fill things up with anything you want
>>705398156
You have T. rex arms.
>>705398316
..has to be peed out of your penis
>>705398156
It instantly re-assembles.
>>705398316
The only thing you want to fill is your anus, and the only thing you want to fill it with is nigger dick.
>>705398316
you can only fill them as if they're a picture in MS paint and you're using the paint bucket
>>705398156
But all you wish for is a never occuring challenge
>>705397851
endless loop become reality
>>705398156
quadriplegic
>>705398156
but only on the 2'nd friday of the year between 3:46 AM and 3:49 AM, and in kootenai county.
The ability to kill myself on demand with no pain.
>>705398413
pure torture
>>705398248
Yeahhh but it's not as bad as being fully paralysed also it's awfully specific, have you got some issues you need to work out over there?
>>705398495
No. If you attempt to condense yourself into nothing you'd create a black hole.
>>705398328
you son of a bitch
>>705398650
You enjoy life.
>>705397987
Is this a superpower?
If so, here the catch:
Most of the time its clara oswald annoying the shit out of you
telekinesis
>>705398650
immortal, wake up 5 minutes after death
the ability to shit diamonds, kill Israel and become trumps wife
>>705398757
you have to watch trap porn to use your power
>>705398757
Can only pick up dildos
The ability to regenerate lost apendages
>>705398859
what's the downside
>>705398757
You can only move things with your mind that are in reach of your hands, you can only move things you have the physical strength to move with your hands, and you have to wrap your hand around anything you want to move.
>>705398848
The diamonds rupture your anus when excreted
>>705398859
>>705398879
Not so bad.
>>705398960
You're a newt.
>>705393959
i would do this
The ability to have dubs/trips/quads/quints when ever i want on 4chan.
>>705398704
and black wholes are the centre of the universe nugget
>>705398679
it's more related to the super power also project what you want to project everyone has issues u potatoless irish knob
>>705399036
i keked so fucking hard.
ability to gain all nourishment from the sun.
Can get my dick sucked at any moment in time by hot bitches
>>705399345
Only on /mlp/
>>705399345
But still a faggot.
>>705399345
no one replies to your threads/responses
>>705399491
The hot bitches are literally flaming female dogs.
>>705399491
all of dem are dogs.
>>705399345
Op will never delivar.
>>705399380
>I'll turn into a black hole
>That somehow makes me at the center of the universe
Are you handicapped?
The ability to have a fucking soul
The power to stop time. And to 3N.ET my own suit in nuclear backwash.
>>705399380
Okay now show me on the doll where your dad touched you
>>705399491
Gay.
>>705399036
doesnt matter spend diamond money on further wiping out existence and proof of israel, spend the change on anus surgery (not my own body grafts either, the flesh of super models only)
>i have a very fast metabolism
>>705392369
Gum Gum no Mi
>>705399672
Your soul is in hell.
>>705399491
their mouths are filled with jalapenos
>>705399672
It ends up in hell regardless of morality.
>>705399888
ability to erase your own memories at will.
>>705393043
The fire is always at room temperature
>>705399999
>>705399888
That won't do anything to my dick would it?
Great trips fam
>>705399797
But only when fighting luffy
I'm a big guy
>>705399957
Only using a .45
>>705399957
your grow tits everytime you do it
>>705399957
your asshole still aches with the pain of your uncles fat cock
>>705400031
The only way to find out is experimentation. Remember to do multiple tests to ensure accuracy. Science is your friend.
>>705400082
if I only have to carry it that's not a problem.
>>705399487
but count dracula had better sun protection than you
The power to turn myself into a sentient quantum singularity.
Control anything
Anywhere
Anytime
>>705395274
Lel
