ITT: Tell your name and anons guess stuff about you
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
ITT: Tell your name and anons guess stuff about you
David D Davidson
Jimmy
Average in every conceivable way, would still suck moots dick
Rupert Johannes Cornelis van Alphen
Sean
Dylan
>>703363135
Fat fuck with a short haircut that watches ufc and fucks a questionably aged 20 something
>>703363197
>Massive stoner
>>703363196
Faps to eccentric shit, smokes a fag afterwords
>>703363197
Wear good shoes and clothes but has not come to terms with his sexuality yet
>>703363199
Shoots guns and joins the military, yells slurs about his enemies but doesn't know what they mean
>>703363372
RJCvA here. Only smoke when drunk, rarely fap but to somewhat "weird" shit I guess - I like seeing the girl dominated.
Ioannis (Ιωαννης)
that's an i ^
>>703363920
Severely strict fuck that wants to seem loose and fun. Is fanatical about one particular subject, possible religion, and will talk shit about everything even if he only thinks he knows a lot about the subject, which he doesn't. Relatively huge cock
Eric Krister
Michael
>>703364645
Had sex once in 8th grade, couldn't get it up since then. Really smart with some obscure technical shit.
Ruben
Aidan
Blake
Morgan
>>703365156
You smoke with the plebs to get a feel of what the lower levels feel like. You enjoy looking at your money but don't appreciate it. You have a girlfriend but you feel you could buy a new one and nothing would change.
>>703365200
A cross breed between really smart and really sexy yet completely undecided on what you want to be. The women interested in you are always very beautiful just as the projects you approach are very difficult but in both cases you don't realize it.
>>703365261
You get drunk and do stupid shit. You wake up and realize being drunk is just as being sober. Your girlfriend likes how wide your dick is but you feel inadequate.
>>703365297
You tried being happy once, it was pretty fun so you do it often.
Gregory
>>703365436
Lmao you described me.
>>703365565
Shaped like an ancient greek god but too power hungry to approach healthy relationships. Might be chubby/kinda out of shape but that's only because you might be too young to accept your destiny as a future dictator.
>>703365569
Which one?
>>703365723
Ruben
2ony.(ya that's how It's spelled.).
>>703365781
Cool
>>703365838
You're white but your parents had problem with their parents. You appreciate the struggles they had to go through, especially your mother, but deep down all the issues of your grandparents were postponed until you came into the picture. You're a vagabond and there's nothing that will ever change that.
Luca
>>703365973
get outta My head.....
Daniel
>>703366016
Small town or village boy. You're pretty mentally healthy though now that you live in a bigger city you wonder if you're the crazy one or big city folk just don't understand the basics. You get a lot of sex or at the very least get enough satisfaction from the attention you get from the gender you're attracted too.
>>703366121
You invited me mate...
Matt
>>703365156
You're fat and either white or black. You smoke whatever you can get your hands on, sweat profusely, and enjoy submarine sandwhiches
>>703365261
Wannabe frat star
>>703365200
Decently good looking but shy beta cuck. In a few years you'll break out of your shell and be drowning in fine women. You also dress extremely well
>>703365565
Going out on a limb here, but you are a pretty average dude that never wants his bros to reimburse him when they come over and drink his brews. A living Good Guy Greg meme.
Kyle
Connor
Nikolay
>>703366164
Extremely loved and cared for by many females in your family. You sometimes fantasize about them but love them too much to even double consider that shit. They like you because they think they can project anything and you'll not be phased by it while you like them because with everyday you understand more of the female ways.
>>703366300
Not gonna do you, you're not here to be read.
>>703366221
its scary true.........
>>703366300
I'm not fat and i don't sweat. I work out alot
>>703366016
strange European kid that is in absurdly good shape for the amount of exercise you actually get. Owns multiple goats. Dresses well. All the barn maidens want ur wienerschnitzel
Zorro
Michael
Kenneth
>>703366316
You really ought to grow up but to be honest it feels pretty good to have the young kids look up to you even if they don't understand you're just like them.
>>703366339
Sick 4 knock downs bruh
>>703366355
Unable to be serious though hormonally strong enough to stare down a giant. You drink waaaay over the limit whenever you feel like letting people off is too much.
>>703366494
Got nothing
>>703366572
You are 100% made of crazy. Nothing comes even close to describing you and you don't care, you know doing you is the only thing you care about so keep doing you.
>>703366614
You dig the whole politics scene but really you're only in it for the pussy. You like it in all shapes and sizes, all colors and forms, even if you say otherwise. The pussy is 99% of your life. Good lord you love dat sweet, sweet delicious pussy even though most of what you get is barely 5/10
I'M Steeven, GIVE ME YOUR BEST
>>703366850
accurate as fuck (I'm Ken)
>>703366928
Protected, underdeveloped, over weight, little muscle mass but thinks he's the shit little cunt.
Zach
I'm gay nigger jewish joe
I bet you cant find hsit about me
>>703367062
You fucking LOOOOOOOOOOVE working. Fuck me dead you'd work all the time. "Why are these people complaining? Haha you think getting paid to do easy work is cool? It's cool I'll agree with you but I think getting paid to work is cool. i'd do this shit for free. Fuck yeah, I don't have to confront anything about myself I just have to fight the world."
>>703367140
Friday nights are fun. Oh shit it's saturday, fuck.
>>703366850
Michael here. That is somewhat accurate.
>>703367325
What's off?
Jonathan
Joshua
cooper
>>703367401
I am crazy, just not 100% crazy
>>703367465
Your parents were old school. Your grandparents were oldschool. You're oldschool. You don't worry about anything or anyone, only about tasks you have to complete. Mental issues are for people who have mental issues.
>>703367528
You'd be really into having your gf suck some other dude's dick but then again that would imply you can get a girlfriend. Keep fapping
>>703367545
About as important or relevant as that 2p you drop on the floor
>>703367571
That's just what a crazy person would say
Will
>>703362933
William
>>703367767
Oh shit you got me
DeMarcus
Ryan
Nicholas
Christian
Onni
brb
>>703367799
Ridiculously strong for your height and weight and with a ridiculous amount of female followers that would drop on their knees in a second for you. Everyone attracted to you is strictly into power plays but you are legitimately too dumb to notice it. Your gf or future gf is probably the first one to realize you are a fucking idiot with a big dick.
>>703367861
Dunno something is off, try again later.
>>703367964
Which one?
>>703368124
Michael
Leopold Squatjigger
>>703366572
Annoying fat fuck
>>703367767
I had a girlfriend but things weren't going great. I do like fapping though and i cant get another girl
Matthew
>>703368259
False
>>703362933
Angie
smitty
>>703368113
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s1X2b0kq9EE&feature=share
>>703368402
you're a liar
>>703368410
daydreaming much
>Till
bryana
Josh
>>703368634
slut or obnoxious as fuck
>>703368573
nonstop
>>703368448
Aw man :D
>>703362933
Chris
>>703367968
You're in it for the fun. Whoever loves you loves you strong enough that all your ego and self worth issues are resolved for at least the next 30 years.
>>703368045
You are never good enough and you will always criticize yourself, even when you surpass the 5% of your career you will look to the side and go slightly off into another field tricking yourself into thinkings it's the same just so you can feel the curshing grind of starting from the bottom. Shorty story shorter, you're a one trick animal.
>>703368058
You like wine almost as much as you like bullshitting. Incredible respectful towards authority figures and people who mastered their fields but only until they teach you their weakness and then you go back to bullshitting.
Victor
Bastian
both tbh
James
>>703368081
Possibly mixed race or at the very least your parents come from different cultures. You are extremely severe by upbringing but extremely "light" by nature which causes conflict and absolutely fantastic sex.
>>703368113
You fucking wot?
>>703368215
You like it in the ass and even though you think this is a joke you know you do.
>>703368938
You left your friends behind to get pussy
Phillip Geller
Toufik
Daniel
>>703369016
You get play of the game for holding left click?
>>703369157
Fan of soy products
Stephen
André
>>703369171
You always tend to isolate yourself from your family as much as possible, and prefer internet to actual human interaction.
jake
>>703369271
1/2 true. not exactly isolated by choice.
Dave
>>703369217
Soy tastes like paper
>>703369109
I wish anon, sleep tight
>>703369298
homo
Sebastian
>>703362933
This weekend saddens me. Tomorrow I am not going out because tommorow it would be 15 years since my Dad died. Suprisingly it was of old age and not terrorist attacks.
Alexis.
>>703368393
You're soft but in the same time you have certain obscure principles that you develop. Because of their nature they never come out with your relatively large number of friends or acquaintances but whenever they do come up you absolutely dismantle your conversational partners.
>>703368402
Young and extremely hormonal girl or guy in stockings. Want nothing else but to be dominated while also be given the free time and understanding to develop your actual personality and interest. In lack of the sexual gratification your fetishes will intensify and lead to a combination of you personality with your sexuality.
>>703368410
Absolute beast. You will fuck shit up and show no mercy. What even are your interests? Nobody fucking knows, even you, you just streamroll through life. You're not even stressed about it, you're that much of a god damn wrecking machine.
Christopher
Moonman
>pic is me
>>703369081
holy shit dude, spot on what are you psychic
>>703368634
Got nothing, something's off.
>>703368648
Priestly mother fucker with a thing for some kinky fetish thing. Now whether that's little boys or dragon shaped dildos it all depends on circumstance and acquaintances but god damn you are the top of your field in that are, some chilling would do you great.
>>703368857
Everything is intense yet chill with you. What ever you do you're pretty good at it but then again you don't stress enough over it. Your girlfriends wants it in the ass? You read some shit a long time ago about not using butter lube. Your friends want you to play support? You saw some video a long time ago about wards. Really man, you're just cool to hang around.
Dane
Protip: Whatever you say, you're right
Takoda
>>703364054
>everyone on /b/
>>703369896
You're a heavily flamboyant kid that is always hanging around with the opposite sex, even though you have no interest in puss.
>>703369137
You're too rich, too educated and too european to be here.
>>703369157
You're on some weird low level shit. Like you're not capable of going into the middle class, let alone higher class but the way you rule the lower class you make it look high class.
>>703369171
Got nothing, are you asking for someone else?
>>703369232
Good athlete, whether it is e-sports or physical sports. You have that little brain tickle that tells you you can do better and you live for nothing else.
>>703369507
Only fucks black dudes, tried being a vegan once. Smokes Marlboro menthols.
>>703363135
>abusive bf if you can even manage to get a gf
>drop-out
>from poor family
>has big dick
Timo
>>703370240
Really tough guy that's not afraid of kicking ass, whether it's necessary or not.
>>703370070
Except that, I mean don't get me wrong I'm bi. But definitely prefer girls, also most of them are underaged. I have a problem.
Taylor
>>703369078
Tfw everyone passes over my name in every single one of these things.
>>703366016
Mentally ill faggot who blackmails females online
>>703369507
Daddy issues, copes with problems by fucking. Smokes menthols, says they taste better after smoking pot. Dyed hair and attracted to the stereotypical "bad boy".
>>703369244
Very muscular which helps compensate for your emotional development. People seem to stop confutations with you on a strictly "probing" basis because they think you'll take it to a physical level. You won't. You like to sing along to songs and make sweet, sweet love to your partner. maaan, people are dicks.
>>703369298
Lay off the gambling, yeah mate?
>>703369358
Love fighting, love confutations, love being an asshole. It's simply who you are and it totally has nothing to do with your mom.
Walter
Sev or Seven
Stefano
>>703369298
You're the macdaddy dragon from the NYC. Ya heard?
>>703366614
>owns a shiba inu
>actually have a gf
Brad
>>703370409
Here you go James.
You're a painfully average person with very little ambitions in life. You just go with the flow in life, and have no real plan for you're future.
>>703362933
Camilla
>>703370492
Strives to be popular and successful, has a significant other that wants to have a big-shot boyfriend
nick
>>703370521
Escaped scientific experiment with the power to communicate with the veil of shadows.
Shelby, Male
>>703370388
You're a singer with an ex-bf complex
Andriy
>>703370675
Stuck up. Sadistic, shit-eating, cocksucking, butt-fucking, penis-smelling, crotch grabbing, ball licking, semen drinking, dog raping, Nazi loving, child touching, cow-humping, perverted, spineless, heartless, mindless, dickless, testicle-choking, urine-gargling, jerk-offing, horse-faced, sheep fondling, toilet kissing, self-centered, feces puking, dildo shoving, snot-spitting, crap gathering, big nosed, monkey slapping, bastard screwing, bean shedding (or possibly shitting), fart knocking. sack busting, splooge tasting, bear blowing, head swallowing, bitch snatching, hand-jobbing, donkey caressing, mucus spewing, anal plugging, hole grabbing, uncircumcised, sewer sipping, whore mongering, piss swimming, midget munching, douchebag, hole biting, carnivorous mail-order prostituting ASSHOLE!
>>703370636
Fuck man that's spot on
>>703370037
Anyone?
>>703369078
You are devoid of personality, the human equivalent of wall paper. Often the greatest of your personal stories involve you getting black out drunk and doing something out of character, being that you have none it's quite the simple task.
>>703370675
you like anal
>>703370732
Oh how I wish.
Elie
Adrian
>>703370869
Never even been drunk, that's how white bread I am.
>>703370037
you are a farm guy
>>703369494
An absolute homosex and almost completely fine with it. You're fit, they're fit, they look great and you def miring. There's more to you then your sexuality but really at this moment you just need to get your dick inside something.
>>703369503
No it doesn't, no it's not, no you're not that clever, you're fat and stupid.
>>703369507
Completely angry at your upbringing and parents. Completely absolutely fucking revolted at what you think is unacceptable acctions of other people towards you. Really you're just clever enough to realize social life has rules but not clever enough to realize people were born and learned things before you did. Get over yourself and live life normally.
>>703369655
A bit overweight but your height compensates. Your girlfriend likes you a lot even if you have low self esteem. She liked that artsy shit you did for her and she really wants you to do more or at least experiment with showing her just how awesome you really are, which you actually are.
>>703369743
Racist twat with a fetish for black men on white women. Not really white himself which is the hilarious part.
>>703369762
No just absolutely smashed. Can you tell me who you are please?
>>703370147
(Toufik) You'd sort of be right but it's more with being at the "top" of the middle class.
Sameed
Alvaro J.C.
>>703370764
Did someone with that name hurt you, Anon?
Shannon
Oliver
>>703370974
Adrian you live with your mum and have uncomfortable thoughts about her. You also fingered your dog when you were 14
>>703362933
Alexander Van Goodwin
>>703371004
Get it the fuck together, James.>>703371009
>>703371239
Fat, sings a little bit, easily bitches about a lot of things, has a short hair.
Erika, but everyone call me Erie
>>703371239
you are a skinny faggot and you like watching traps
>>703371276
>secretely jewish
>likes eating girls assholes
>no luck with romance
>>703371239
Goody two-shoes. Social buttefly.
Ron
Dimitri
>>703371279
Part of it it's right I guess... :^)
>>703371332
you are fat
Guido Brenner
>>703371332
tits or GTFO
>>703371332
One of those fairy witch types. Listens to best coast. Reads probably, bet like a whole jar of Nutella has green hair. Tumblr
>>703371029
>Sebastian
Sorry but I'm more into incest, impregnation, bestality, vanilla and sometimes lolli.
>You're fit
Well kind of. I'm in Auschwitzmode.
>>703371490
Cmon you got to say which part!
>>703371545
lurk more
And...fuck you guys for not saying anything
Djilali
>>703371477
you are sitting this way
>>703369896
You drink, you like to like things and all your previous partners seems to be obsessed with you. You know one rule and one rule only, keep going out of your comfort zone. What ever you developed I can't tell but you are developing and you will keep developing, it's who you are.
>>703370037
Could you give me another clue please, I get too much from just Takoda.
>>703370056
Hah!
>>703370240
Likes rap and dirt jokes. You easily make friends with ridiculously powerful people because you simply enjoy the ride instead of challenging them. You honestly either blank out when they spill their shit on you or you just don't get what they're spilling. They appreciate it and you get free shit, win win.
>>703370388
Taylor was a good girl never to be late, poor taylor
you need a daddy figure but don't look to the big fat guy look to the skinny guy, they're the daddy that are not yet daddy
Stephen
>>703371303
I like to be in control of my actions and I'm not over 21 yet. Also have no friends to drink with and I don't wanna get drunk alone because I don't know my limits. Also alcoholism runs in my family.
>>703371526
i dont think i am, i do run a lot to stay fit
>>703371545
ok
>>703371550
i do love reading and do have red hair but i never went on tumblr, and i have no idea what fairy witch types means so i dont think i am (maybe i am)
>>703371718
you like shitting in a street
>>703371678
blow me :)
>>703371718
Like to fuck goats
>>703370543
nobody?
Henry
>>703371843
Kek i'm not indian
Emily
OP here, I'm out because of alcoholism. If you want me to specifically do you quote me with your name or previous post and I will.
Ivan
Charlotte
matt
>>703371989
you're a lesbian
>>703371895
That more accurate
>>703371977
you're fat and you wear fat girl sweats stained with ben and jerry's
>>703363135
"Internet friends" is a common term for you
>>703371876
you wish :P
>>703371876
I know the weather's hot now that it's summer but you can just get a fan rather than asking people to blow on you :)
Hugh Mungus
>>703362933
If i told you my name you would easily find me on facebook.
Sooooo no...
>>703371986
Stephen
>>703372116
nope, dope. YOU do. :)
>>703371988
you are just like dimitri
Duncan
>>703372098
Very depressed and sad person, I don't know what hurt you or why you forgot who you were but please lighten up and try to refind joy either in old things or new things. You're a good person and you deserve it, even if past event say otherwise
>>703372049
Not true. Straight as your erect dick.
Alexander Grey
>>703372252
you're a horse
>>703372186
Rapist?
Chase
>>703372232
and i assume you don't mind ;)
>>703372166
LOL! you can lick my ass. :)
>>703372315
You're a chad
>>703372186
>>703372264
then you're blond
>>703362933
Bayly
>>703372197
I got nothing other than extremely horny and missing their previous family relationships.
>>703372228
Are you asking for someone you know? You don't feel like a stephen.
>>703372186
Did you just sexually assault me?
Shaun Sapp
Roland
>>703372039
people tend to walk all over you
Jacob
>>703372404
Brown actually. Anymore guesses?
>>703372464
you like fast food
>>703363920
You are a PAOK fan
>>703372509
Underage?
>>703372436
I'm for sure extremely horny
>>703372537
you will post a picture of yourself in this thread
Graham
>>703372408
Is that a real Name?
>>703372653
Or?
>>703372499
right. used to have chad friends and that they did.
>>703372718
you're rich
Suzanne
>>703372436
>You don't feel like a Stephen
:(
Carlos
Manuel
Also can I just say this is a perfect woman? Yeah? Ok thanks
>>703372760
Milf? You sound like a Milf?
>>703362933
David.
>>703362933
Patrick Colin McCormick
>>703372728
it was just a guessing. are you sure i was wrong?
>>703362933
Raphael
I actually don't like fast foods op
>>703372791
you are a drug dealer
>>703372843
You an Irelandfag?
>>703371821
You're naturally skinny, and are pretty quiet in social situations. You're not very ambitious, but you there's something you enjoy, you put in all of your effort.
Btw, same name bros
>>703372791
A true bro. You'd never abandon your friends, no matter what the circumstances. Currently single.
>>703372791
Spanish
>>703372589
24 actually
Kai
>>703372791
You're not voting for Trump
>>703372721
According to me state ID
>>703372771
Strongly independent family ego driven man. You live for others not for yourself, not out of selfishness but because others have more problems than you do and hence you get to grow more by solving their problems than yours. If you go into isolation, which now it kinda feels like you do, you will grow and wither.
Harry Christian Smith
Simon-Pierre
>>703372253
thats... depressing accurate... just like my life :\
Tyler
>>703372821
not yet
>>703372872
Positive. Have another guess. You amuse me :)
Philip Andrews
>>703372875
you are blond, rich and you like to ride horses and play tennis
Thomas
>>703372917
nope
>>703372929
yes and yes
>>703372932
gee i wonder what gave it away
>>703372962
touche
>>703371314
nope.
>>703371372
nope.
>>703371425
100% right about the social butterfly shit.
>>703362933
Richard
>>703373004
a european fitness fag maybe rich
Justin
>>703373074
All are negative.
>>703372998
>>703372926
Both decently accurate, I think.
>>703373071
you are tall and skinny, small boobs and you're virgin
>>703372924
Canacuck
>>703373072
believe in the 32983th gender
>>703373012
Don't worry you'll be fine once you find the girl that's looking for you.
I am so drunk right now though, I have no idea. I'm kinda crazy and I'm waiting for a reply from the person I'm supposed to be here but they're not here so I don't know what's happening.
>>703373239
Why the I think?
Steven
>>703373004
french and your parents live in a small town
Brandon
>>703372509
A real mama's boy, wouldn't hesitate to rat someone out to the authorities.
>>703372360
>LOL!
This is where the banter ends. We do not speak normie here.
Nick
>>703373165
not even close, not european, not fit at all, and i guess im in the higher kinda of middle class
>>703373353
you're overweight
>>703362933
Garrett
Eddie
>>703373454
you have two friends with similar names
>>703373253
Not that tall, fairly slim, I think I have decently sized jugs and yes, I'm a virgin. Aren't we all here?
>>703373435
Tall lanky and kind of awkward
>>703373371
you are the average and you have a lot of friends
>>703362933
Brüno
Brody
>>703373454
you like basketball
Anthony
>>703373528
Gay trying to be straight?
Bruno
Shaun Sapp
>>703373408
ya i am 6'4 255 rip
>>703373435
Nice jaw and facial hair. You like to piss people off but you realy heavily on being able to have a safe space to retreat too, be it your workspace or a partner that holds your shit together. You offer strength to reliability and thus people put up with you.
>>703373528
You know who you are and you know what you're doing, why are you in this thread?
>>703373561
>>703373552
Both in the closet
>>703373561
Sports jock that is always talking about girls
>>703373591
Huge hunk of a man that does not hesitate to beat the snot out of someone.
>>703362933
sharing a name with a 1000 people worldwide means i can't share mine.
>Sadfingerbox.jpg
>>703373345
both true, good g uess
>>703373524
not average but definitely a good social life so kinda right
>>703373557
Painter
Jake
>>703373813
likes paint
>>703362933
Jon
>>703373746
Sometimes you slip, like today, but you slip smartly and you slip incognito. Don't worry your little paranoid self, the resources available are divided somewhere else.
Jerome
>>703373506
you live in north europe and you're considering dropping school to become a full time twitch streamer
>Aren't we all here?
sadly
>>703373813
your lastname is ms
>>703373680
lol no actually I'm very peaceful and not strong at all (179cm and 83KG)
>>703373862
I fucking hate my name for that single joke
>>703373839
Introvert that got held back a couple grades
>>703373894
Eastern European?
Jacqueline Blackhall
>>703373928
Wow
>>703373881
You get shit done. Do you need to fuck a sheep? You'll fuck the sheep. Do you need to make a million dollars? You'll make a million. Who you are is directly dependent on the environment you are cast in by your old environment. You do not own you.
>>703373992
you're fake. that's not your name.
>>703373949
Kind of introverted, definitely didn't get held back.
>>703373921
I do live in north Europe actually. Britfag here.
>>703373284
i found the girl thats looking for me, and im still not fine. i thought the same as you, but i realized my life is still devoid of meaning, purpose, or happiness.
Hugh Mungus
>>703374117
italian here
>>703374165
you are the lord of these lands
>>703373992
You live un southern US, you are a redneck who got pregnant at 16 and has an abusive husband you love.
>>703374118
Get over yourself and then other selfs will make sense.
>>703374213
That's pretty Hot.
Matthias
>>703374293
Greek?
Caleb
>>703374293
Civilian life is not for you. Fight and conquer, what ever your field, fight and conquer, never rest and never stop sweating.
>>703374293
weird nordic guy with Chad like features but severe autism,yet big dick
congrats
Björn
>>703374290
at least when i'm behind a screen. irl i'm not hot at all and btw, you like singing in the shower
>>703373335
You are english, you come from the midlands, you have a university degree but work in a shitty low profile job (such as a bank clerk or administrative employee) and the only joy in your life is to go to the pub to drink pints and watch football.
>>703374537
basketball player who gives girls STD's and call them sluts after you've fucked them
>>703374552
Yes! How'd you guess? And I'm sure you're not that bad looking.
Shaun Sapp
>>703374293
you are fit
Someone make a new thread.
>>703374659
you look like an happy girl
