Any anons ever fucked a celebrity?
Share your stories here.
Once, I beat off while looking at a picture of Taylor Swift.
>>703259853
your mom before she started doing free porn behind the Walmart
>>703259853
Was raped by Bill Murray.
He said no one would believe me.
I had sex with Amanda Bynes after a party 4 years ago. We were both drunk and coked up. It was meh.
>>703259853
I fucked Courtney Love at some shitty loft party in Detroit. And this was before camera phones. Sorry, no pics. But I have herpes, for proof!
>>703259853
Friend fucked Ricci, and said she was disgusting.
>>703259853
Fucked Karmen Karma in highschool, her little sister is hotter though
>>703259853
I fucked Carmen San Diego. Haven't seen her since.
>>703260044
Her body, any good?
No, but I have had sex with women who graduated from Harvard, Princeton, and Yale.
>>703261757
No you didn't
>>703259986
Edgy 12yo fag
>>703262126
I really, actually did.
Princeton was the best.
>>703262282
No, you didn't
>>703261535
Keked slightly.
Fucked Shannon Doherty in the wardrobe room on 'North Shore ". Past her prime, but was fun.
>>703262942
No, you didn't
Lake bell and Kirsten dundst did a movie filmed in my hometown and I was their chauffeur, lake had me go to a party with her because her date bailed
>Her drinking was heavy
>Went to drop her off where she was staying on the beach
>Invited me in for a cup of coffee
>?????
>Best dicksucking of a lifetime
>>703263374
Yeah, that didn't happen
How about the redditor that spent a week fucking and doing heroin with Peaches Geldof?
He deleted it out of respect when the media caught wind of his post, then she died...
https://gawker.com/5502453/peaches-geldofs-heroin-fueled-one-night-stand-at-hollywoods-scientology-centerwith-pictures?skyline=true&s=i
>>703263531
I have pics to prove on my desktop but I'm waiting for another client to finish at a party and I won't be home until 2:30. Doubt this thread will still be alive.
>>703263374
Describe it
>>703263801
Sure you do...
My claim to fame. Had Rachel Riley a few times whilst we were both at Oxford. She was a right dirty bitch. We were still fucking when she got engaged. Didn't see her again after she graduated until she appeared on TV. Still wank off to those memories. Fit as fuck and loved to swallow. Only had anal once, she wasn't into it, but her arse is one of the best I have ever seen and so fucking tight.
For the non British on this thread, pic related. UK TV celebrity.
>>703264023
No, you didn't
>>703264023
Share the best suck & swallow story
>>703264089
Believe what you want. I know it happened and I have the memories. So fuck you.
>>703264194
I see you enjoy fiction...
>>703264023
i want to believe
I buttfucked Amy Schumer before she was famous. Fat ass on that one. good buthole too, bitch knew how to work it. She eats like a fucking horse.
>Any anons ever fucked a celebrity?
Share your stories here.
OK fine I'll contribute.
>>703261535
kek
I've seen the boobs of a woman who was best friends with a guy who is now one of Katy Perry's backup dancers. It's getting pretty serious.
>>703259853
Fucked Dolly Parton on a semi-regular basis for about 8 years.
>>703259853
>Any anons ever fucked a celebrity?
Feet count?
Feet count!
I was just out of college working lighting on a shitty 90s grrl power sitcom called "Can't Hurry Love".
Staff party with booze. Mariska Hargitay was the designated pretty girl on the show -- she's famous now for Law & Order SVU -- and she had a bit too much.
I vocally offer ride home for any who had too much . . . only Mariska accepts.
We get to her condo and she invites me in to "see the renovation". I don't know what to expect, but think that sex isn't on the table because
1. I'm a 23 yr old nobody
2. She's a star
3. She's widely rumored to be a lezbo
Anyway we sit on the couch talking and she's drunk n kinda flirty. She puts her feet on my lap and starts saying how thankful she is that I drove her home. My boner is raging even tough I hadn't been overly attracted to her (she was kinda 'hard' looking when she was younger) and definitely not a foot guy.
She tells me to 'go ahead and take it out'. She jerked me off with her feet and complimented my cock after I came.
We hugged when I left. She acted weird around me after that and I knew better than to tell anyone what had happened.
The weird thing about her is that she looked better @ 50 than in her late 20s because age has really softened her man-jaw and filled out her tits.
Rumor is that she's still (mostly) lesbian and that her husband is gay.
(also fucked Mika Tan at the Bunny Ranch).
>>703264435
No, you didn't
>>703260106
kek
>>703264429
How fucking old are you!!
>>703261535
My sides reached escape velocity.
>>703263801
Prove it faggot, 2:30 start a new thread, I'll keep my eye out
>>703259853
Due to the nature of the story, I have to keep all parties/specifics anonymous.
I was working for a pretty well-known online delivery service. I go to drop off some groceries for a customer and knock. No answer. The door was open, and I stuck my head in and announced myself. No answer. I pushed the door open and saw a pair of legs sitting weirdly askew in the halway.
I walked in and saw a famous celebrity who had hung themselves from a doorknob by their belt. I ran over, checked their pulse and they were gone.
I had always been a fan, and couldn't believe they were gone. Nobody seemed to be in the house. I had always been attracted to the celebrity, but I figure'd I'd never even run into them, much less find them dead. I knew I only had moments. I unfastened their neck from the belt, tugged down their shorts and slid my erection into their anus. I pumped wildly for a couple minutes, then unloaded my seed into the celebs ass.
Suddenly I heard the corpse gasp, then cough. I knew the celeb might tell about my abuse, so I looped their head through the belt and left them as I found them, then legged it out the door.
Got to fuck an A list celebrity, and 2 free weeks of groceries! It was like winning the lottery.
>>703264721
No, you didn't
>>703263949
She only took off her top, but her breasts are very nice. I believe she was a part of the fappening, so you can see for yourself, but the pictures don't do any justice. Her technique was perfect, not too handsy, no gagging even when she went to the hilt (7 1/4" before I get "yeah, because you have a 2" cock, haha"). I would rate her skills at about a 9.25/10, only because I had a dicksucking from a fat chick who was literally the master at it.
>>703264774
did so.
>>703264887
Nope
>>703264429
Jesus man, how old are you?
>>703264866
Swallow?
>>703264980
asked and answered
>>703259853
My ex-wife and I almost had a threesome with the original Storm from American Gladiators.
>>703264944
check the story. totally legit.
>>703259965
did her lack of an ass turn you on?
>>703265077
Nope. Waste of time. I don't enjoy fiction.
>>703264866
I would kill for this to be true.
Not really a me-story but my mom dated Scott Stapp from Creed when they were teenagers. Not sure if they got nasty but I know they dated for a while. This was obviously way before my time though. Never seen him in person or been to a concert or know much about him and his band but it's pretty cool my mom knew him.
I so want to believe all of these are true.
>>703265179
Is this because were were date raped by bill cosby?
>>703265348
No, she didn't
>>703265130
Price check: he's secretly into boys.
>>703264705
Yeppers
>>703265428
Nope.
>>703264742
Fuck dude she's seventy now. How old was she when you were banging her?
>>703265443
She did tho.
I was raped by Bugs Bunny behind the log flume at Six Flags.
He's a lot bigger in person, you know.
>>703265606
No, she didn't
>>703264518
If I were gonna make that shit up I'd have been more creative than a foot jerk.
>>703265659
I believe it
>>703265708
No, you wouldn't
>>703265044
She went all the way down when I came so I guess you could say yes? Went right down the hatch.
>>703264705
I'll be going right to bed anyway because I have to pickup another client at 7am, but I almost considered it until you were a rude ass bitch about it.
I also had vin diesel (he has a house in my city on the beach) as a client one night back when I had a stretch panamera and I wondered why he wasn't talkative because I imagined he would be a bit chatty, then I realised he was getting head, haha.
>>703264429
You magnificent bastard. Hittin' it at Pigeon Forge?
>>703264774
Lel your pretty efficent at trolling
> i dont believe them either
>>703265498
Started when I was 31, so almost 8 years ago.
>>703265348
You're weiner cousins with a rock star.
Both your cawks have been in the same vag.
>>703265659
fake and gay
>>703265788
Get any celebs fucking in the back?
>>703265788
No, you didn't. Because you don't have the pics.
>>703265935
real and SUPER gay.
>>703265789
Yep
>>703265906
Man that's messed up why'd you have to go there lol
>>703265834
Mah nigga.
>>703265834
Oh my fuck
was fucking Elmer Fudd for a while before the stutter and hunting obsession started.
>>703266220
I believe it
Michael J. Fox gave me a hand job once; it was superb because of PARKINSON'S
>>703265233
Very true, sir. I've been a chauffeur for about 6 years since I was about 21, I have had more than my fair share of dicksucking from wealthy women. Most aren't "celebrities" per se, but semi-influential. It helps that I'm a very good conversationalist, I'm 6'5", and I take care of my body. I like to pride myself on the fact that I've only had one client roll up the window on me and not have a good chat, and that's only because they were on the phone the whole time.
>>703266453
Liar.
I choked Linda Lovelace
>>703266002
Being a cunt gets you nowhere in life. If it did, you wouldn't be 350lbs in your parents house in Kansas.
>>703259853
My hand. It's technically part of a famous person.
>>703266453
What other celebs have sucked your cock?
I know a girl who blew Chris Brown and fucked Machine Gun Kelly. I'm sure there are others because she works in LA and dresses celebrities.
>>703266631
Yew right on
>>703266749
Where and when did she blow Chris?
>>703266148
>Man that's messed up why'd you have to go there lol
I have a momcest fetish and never miss a chance to spread the gospel.
>>703266643
Because lying on the internet gets you sooooo much further in life.
>>703266686
Obviously, we are going to ask, who are you.
>>703266749
No, you don't
>>703266944
No, we're not
>>703266902
Right before he slapped her
>>703264023
Can't... Stop... Fapping.
No pictures of her from then?
>>703259853
Many, ive partied with countless Hollywood folk where the back room is always a big fuck fest. I'm kinda famous too but you guys would never guess who I am. You've probably never heard of me
>>703264435
>Can't Hurry Love
wow she really did have a man-jaw
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ORtmP01v51I
>>703267024
No, you haven't
>>703267024
Who's fucking who?
>>703266902
I'm not sure. I'm assuming a party or something. I haven't seen her for a couple years. She was bragging to her friends about it and they told me.
>>703266591
You're welcome to have your opinion about it, but I don't come on this website to fabricate stories. I honestly like having discussions with people and hearing other obviously legit stories like the foot job law and order chick guy.
>>703265982
Naa. Just vin. I've had quite a number of celebs as clients but most wait to let the pussyjuice flow until I've gotten them where their going.
>>703266944
Yeah, no.
>>703267228
Sure you don't. I always come to 4chan to tell the truth about myself to other anons instead of interacting face-to-face with people that I can try to impress with my bullshit stories. Yep. Your logic is impeccable. Liar.
>>703267275
Listen faggot, either you have the balls to tell us, or you don't mention that you're 'famous'. Stupid cunt.
>>703259986
oh i know, but i will have to inform you that the funeral home is getting new locks soon.
>>703267050
>wow she really did have a man-jaw
Yup. . . . it looked even worse when she had short hair.
For someone hired to play a sex symbol, she was never more than a 7 when she was young.
>>703267356
I'm obviously lying. Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
>>703267024
reminds me of that lighting technician guy who went to a celebrity party and saw everyone fucking. must be awesome
>>703267578
Exactly. Cunt.
I didn't fuck anyone but my good friend used to take drugs with miley cyrus often. They'd hit it up every weekend or so. I'm sure they fkd
>>703259853
I know no one will believe this, but I fucked Kimberly Heffner right after she divorced Hugh.
>>703266931
Read
>>703267228
I don't need to lie, I have an awesome job, make 250k/year and get to do what I love most, driving, all day every day.
>>703266734
Not any other celebs, but plenty of multimillionaire daughters.
>>703267146
Usually a couple will stay with each other but some women would join in with another couple.
>>703267835
what's she like in person?
>>703267852
All at least 16 right?
>>703267892
No, I mean any very famous people involved? Like A/B list
>>703267892
do you see teen celebrities fking? or just adult celebs?
True story, don't give a fuck if anyone believes it: I fucked the granddaughter of a very famous musician, I am talking household name. The granddaughter was a preop transsexual (she has since had SRS)
Rebecca Black came over to a friend's party in OC and she smoked a shit ton of weed, and i was drunk so i made my move, we started making out then she grabbed my hand and we went down stairs and fucked
>>703267916
Really super nice. Girly girl, but way confident. Everything goes her way and she knows it.
>>703265659
This makes no sense. Bugs Bunny is a cartoon. How can he rape you?
>>703267852
how'd you get your job? sounds dank
>>703267733
I love you as well, anon.
>>703267584
You constantly hear moaning and the rooms pretty hot and smokey
>>703268126
Whore.
>>703260106
heh, a good friend of mine banged her and got herpes too! later got married and his wife freaked when she found out.
Not really a celebrity, but I banged this girl that had her 15 minutes of fame in the skateboarding world. She was in thrasher.
>>703268230
No, he didn't
>>703268255
No, you didn't
>>703268170
Talk dirty to me, anon.
>>703267932
All were 18+. I don't play games like that. I own my company and can't risk that type of shit.
>>703267347
Why don't you go out and do something fun that you can tell stories about instead of trying to accuse others that their liars? It's a lot more enjoyable, I can promise you that. Why come on a thread if you're just going to nay-say everyone on it?
>>703268376
OK. But considering you're 6'5", a great conversationalist, and take good care of yourself, why are you here?
>>703262374
He's either a troll or jerks off with his pinkie out.
I had a 4-way with Lassie and Mr. Ed and Arnold from Green Acres
>>703268334
totally did. he did her for a few months, not just one night. said she was wicked smart woman, but kinda mental.
>>703268681
Nope.
I was supposed to fuck a porn performer a couple weeks ago (she's also a prostitute), but she cancelled
She's not exactly famous, but she has done some work with Brazzers
>>703268065
>Kimberly Heffner
she seems very nice
thats cool
>>703268772
No, you weren't
>>703268652
What does the pinkie thing mean?
>>703267980
I mostly recognize the male celebrities, the women celebrities probably want more privacy and romance than some back room. I do remember seeing chris brown and a white woman who probably wasnt famous but a random chick.
>>703268007
Nope but if i have i dont think i recognized them
i fucked Miranda Cosgrove at a usc party, im pretty sure she was coked out of her mind
>>703268255
WHO BITCH?
>>703268861
It means I have class and am refined in my masturbatory technique.
>>703268889
Give a rundown on who you recognized and what they were doing?
>>703268920
greentext
>>703268125
I started out working as a courier at 16, then moved to chauffeuring at 21, just bought the company from the person I worked for last year.
>>703268515
I wasn't always like this. I started boxing and eating right around 18 and I guess I just like the fucked up humour here. I'm very sociopathic (which certainly helps me succeed) and this place lets me feed my fucked up side and is very entertaining.
>>703268920
No, you didn't
>>703269112
OK.
>>703261535
Where in the world even is she anyways
>>703269112
did you get most of your height after 18 or before?
I haven't, but my girlfriend fucked one
>>703263128
Fuck off, Virgin
>>703269297
Nope.
used to bang this chick on the regular.
The mother from family matters. she got dirty.
>>703260191
Christina is one of my great heart-throbs. I still want to buy her Girl Scout cookies. What was so disgusting about her?
>>703269458
No, you didn't
>>703259853
Yeah uh i fucked kati parry and shilo le buff
>>703269600
prove it.
>>703268772
>I was supposed to fuck a porn performer a couple weeks ago (she's also a prostitute), but she cancelled
If you're gonna do a porn pro you ought to go to the Nevada whorehouses where they at least get tested before they work.
ALL of your favorite pornstarlets have herpes and HPV.
If you're gonna go party with a video prostitute stick with covered blowjobs, hand jobs and tit fucks.
>>703268959
A fan girl of one of the pros. Pretty much only famous for crying when she met him
>>703269222
Nice trips, haha.
I was already 6'4" at 18 and slowly got the last inch between 18-21. The shitty part is that I wear a size 14 shoe so designer shit that isn't made for shaq-esque negroes doesn't come in my size. Honestly, if you are short, don't feel bad about it. It's 2016 and anyone that isn't overweight and has good confidence on top of dressing halfway decent has a chance with any woman.
>>703269708
seems legit
>>703269719
Burden of proof sits on your shoulders, anon.
>>703269815
Sure you did.
its amazing how many losers on this site have fucked celebrities... considering most other threads are about lack of sex and depression haha.
>>703269815
>tfw 5'9" with size 12 feet
thanks for the advice though
>>703263801
What was the name of the movie they were in together, anon?
>>703268786you have to understand that when this woman walks in to a room, at least back then, everything stops around her. It's bizarre. In lifpght of all that she is extremely nice to all her friends and she was a blast to party with.
>>703269971
Interesting. Very interesting.
>>703269833
doesn't matter to me if you believe it.
>>703268772
this is definitely true. Getting stood up by a whore must hurt.
>>703269971
haha yeah its almost like there are 200,000 users on right now and that encompasses a wide variety of personalities haha!
>>703270090
OK, but it obviously does matter to you because you responded initially.
>How dare you challenge my lie, anon?
>>703270040
>you have to understand that when this woman walks in to a room, at least back then, everything stops around her. It's bizarre.
truly amazing.
also how was the sex?
>>703269873
I've seen much better trolling from Ken M.
This dumb bitch. Way past her Go Daddy spokeswomen prime. Met her through work trying to set up some PR. Had to do dinner/drinks. She was boring and annoying but when I started to compliment her it all turned around. I kept feeding her drinks and acting like she was the hottest thing ever and she let me pound.
>>703269458
slayin winslow booty son
>>703270188
youre the one responding to everyone and being buttbothered about this whole thread nigga hahaha XDXD
I fucked Sophie Dee 5 years ago. Cost me 1500. She was o.k. I paid to fuck her, not to get the most mind blowing sex of my life. Would not pay to fuck another porn actress, not even Remy Lacroix.
>>703270267
>>703270270
No, you didn't
>>703268057
Cher's "daughter"?
>>703270270
are you a chad
>>703270335
No, you didn't
>>703270335
Hahaha, I love Sophie Dee, I still wouldn't pay her to fuck.
>>703270098
>Getting stood up by a whore must hurt.
yeah, it kinda sucked, but I didn't take it personally. She had some medical emergency that caused her to cancel her whole tour
>>703270228
Rushed, unfortunately. We were at her friends house and it was a quicky. I didn't complain.
>>703270270
she have insta or kik or snap?
>>703270335
how did you set that up?
>>703270335
How did you arrange this?
>>703270353
Whatever. OP asked.
>>703270408
Yes I did, Took me 3 months to get vetted.
>>703270228
I can tell you the best part.... I didn't know who she was until the next day.
>>703270441
There isn't a porn actress you would pay to fuck?
>>703270463
damn
so you must be some kind of ubermensch to have had a chance with her?
>>703270504
And you lied. On an anonymous board.
>>703270505
Nope.
>>703270353
I didn't?
>>703270404
I'm Mel, the black Chad.
>>703270471
Do you have an insta kik or snap?
>this is another girl
>>703270588
U mad ? It happened and I didnt really care. Is that why your upset ?
>>703270586
>Ubermensch
I wish Nietzsche could reach out from his grave to bitch slap the ignorance from your mouth.
>>703270496
>>703270502
agency. took me 3 months to get vetted (proven that I wasn't a cop or psycho). Saddest part is that I could have waited until she went to the U.K. She is about 500 cheaper there.
>>703270586
It was all completely random string of events.
>>703270588
>>703270588
U mad ? I did and I didnt really care. Is that why you are upset ?
>>703270694
Nope.
>>703270651
Nope.
>>703260010
He was right.
>>703270569
No. Chances are a majority of them have at the very least herpes. I'm not going to pay to have herpes, especially after so many different dudes have came inside of them. Not my thing.
>>703270619
sotty. i lied. I admit that I was fucking you up the ass while thinking I was having sex with Sophie.
I'm 22 y/o male at this present day.
When I was 13, Elton John came to our school to talk to us about music and how much it can have an impact on life. We were a special school for troubled youth and orphans. Essentially it was a school filled with vulnerable kids such as myself. Elton specifically came to my music class and was giving advice to all aspiring students in our class.
Being that young, I didn't know who the fuck he was, but everyone especially the teachers/adults were star struck and shocked to see him in the flesh. One of the female teachers even cried, but to me I was just like 'what the fuck is wrong with this bitch?'
Why are they making such a big deal out of this old dude with a fucken bowl cut lol. Elton had a bowl cut at the time from what I remember. He was very weird looking and he wore sunglasses inside which I thought was really douchey.
Anyways, I was kind of a late bloomer. I didn't really find out what sex was until I was 15, being an orphan in foster care, I moved around a lot and so I never had a family to keep up with my personal education. I never got the sex talk. I never knew how it worked. I use to think girls get pregnant from a kiss.
I wasn't gay at the time, but I was curious. I didn't understand boners, I just knew that I got them everytime I got excited. Like when they told us we were going on a field trip out of town I randomly got a boner.
Anyways, back to the story. So, Elton was tutoring us kids in the quiet room (A room filled from the floor to the ceiling with acoustic foam, dead silent), every one in the class was assigned or chose a instrument for the rest of the semester. I chose the piano, unaware that, that was Elton's choice of instrument.
So as the students lined up outside for one on one meet & greet/tutor of the quiet room, when it was my turn I was going in really not excited and just didn't give af. I remember those next few minutes so vividly, and I think I always will for the rest of my life. Cont...
I had sex with Reginald VelJohnson in 1988.
He was a gentle lover.
>>703259853
I went down on Terri Schiavo while I was a janitor in her hospital.
To this day still the best tasting vegatable I've ever eaten
>>703270794
I like your honesty. I've never had a breakout, so can't say she gave me herpes.
>>703270839
>Cont...
Not necessary
>>703270839
>703270839
>>703270931
I wish that this was true.
>>703270913
I believe it
>>703270936
Most people who have herpes do not show symptoms. Doesn't mean they can't spread it, or haven't caught it.
>>703270931
I kek'd
>>703270931
I believe it
>>703261535
Oh man this is nostalgic
>>703270931
>>703270496
>>703270502
http://www.eros.com/search/text?sch=xxx&location_id=2&utm_source=overlay&utm_medium=cpc&utm_term=porn-stars&utm_campaign=date-porn-stars
Or you can try the big name Nevada whorehouses.
>>703270651
nudes or gtfo
>>703270699
i wish Nietzsche would slap the snobby arrogance out of you
>>703270020
I haven't the foggiest idea, I don't watch movies very often that aren't sci-fi or have will smith in it and most clients prefer not to have conversations about work so I stay away from the subject.
yea i fucked a porn star before
Here's the video
>>703264721
so you banged robin williams, then left him to die?
>>703264721
You butt-raped Robin Williams. LMAO
>>703264023
She seems like she would be a total cunt to the people in her life.
>>703265834
I saw her up close in the early 1980s and she was already well over the hill.
"The fact of your firm young body … commingling … with the withered flesh … sagging breasts … and flabby buttocks makes … me … want … to … vomit."
>>703266686
Donald, don't you have a campaign to derail or something?
>>703260010
Classic Bill Murray!
>>703265834
You probably shouldn't tell people that anymore.
Gross dude.
>>703271308
I know this is a troll post, but it's much easier than you think. All you need is cash and patience (connections help). If they are UTR, unless you have lots of money and a connection, you aren't getting any. Not all of them are prostitutes. A guy who used to fuck lots of porn actresses tried, very unsuccessfully, to hook up with Alexis Texas and other actresses claimed she was very UTR.
My mom fucked snoop dog before he got famous. She is now addicted to meth and lives in a trailer.
Fucking coalburner
>>703271830
No, you don't
>>703271924
are you looking for another ass fucking?
>>703268058
celebrity thread... not cancer thread
ok, I know nobody is going to believe me, but I got a blowjob from Mike Smith (Bubbles in Trailer Park Boys)
Was a PA on "Dancing With The Stars" when Cloris Leachman was on. She needed a ride back to her hotel because transpo cunts went home because golden time. I called her Ms. Leachman and she was like "Call me Chloe"
Cont?
>>703270270
Shouldn't do that when you're the teacher.
I fucked ariana grande 100% true no lie
>>703272003
whoops. mistook you for the other anon. You may be able to pick up whores, I mean porn actresses, without having to pay, but I tend to not believe those stories... unless they involve Lisa Ann and a well hung black man.
Back in the day I went to high school at Worthington Christian and got a hand job from this chick name Maggie Denig. Then a few years later she got kidnapped and Liam Neeson saved her. Small world.
>>703272045
Bullshit, he's not a fag.
I had sex with Scott Baio at the repub convention this year.
He's got a small government if you know what I mean.
>>703264429
Meh, who didn't?
>>703272262
I believe it
Fucked Alina Li before she went all porn star nigger dick fucker
>>703271830
>All you need is cash and patience (connections help).
Or you can just use the link I posted >>703271144
>>703271308
she looks stoned.
I fucked my wife's daughter once.
She was pretty famous in school.
>>703271574
ahaha yeah, totally, but you forgot to call him drumph, too ahaha... You fucking disgusting beta libshit.
>>703272218
neither am I. It was just a blowjob
>>703259853
>pic related.
>>703272119
greentext that shit
>>703270839
he molested you at zero hour, 9am. and he was high as a kite.
and i think its gonna be a long long time, till my therapist probes around my brain to find, my balls were diddled by a flaming fag oh no no no....
>>703259853
I fucked Chloe Moretz in a bathroom in Hollywood. She was quite tight, really.
>>703272480
Story?
>>703259853
I fucked a porn star on mdma in the 90's. Her name is Dina Jewel.
>>703268920
Get off the internet dan
>>703272068
*sigh* sure, why not... let's see where this goes.
>>703270839
The quiet room was a 2 part room, the main big one had the drum kit and other large instruments, the second one in the back was a smaller one with a digital piano.
It honestly is so vivid to me. I walked into the small studio area, with my music teacher opening the door for me, and Elton John was there sitting down by the digital piano with a empty seat beside it. He was wearing a fancy shirt with shiny collars on it, with what look like a custom made suit jacket on. He was wearing non-tinted dark shades, which I was confused at the time because it was so fucking dim in there.
it was the kind of shades where it's black but you can just see his eyes. He smiled and looked at me with a gap between his teeth and said "hey little buddy, hows it going" "what's your name?" "Anon, sir" he shakes my hand very intimately. With both his hands and grips my arm for a lengthy bit of time, which I thought was weird.
We sat down and he asked me questions on why i chose music and what I see myself doing with music in the future. He ask me to perform my best song and favorite song for him, and that was Mozart's Sonata No. 11, my own personal touch to it.
He told me it was a very sad and beautiful piece, and told me there were different ways to approach the piece, that every one of Mozart's Major or Minor pieces which may originally appear to portray a certain emotion, can the polar opposite. Yes, I remember everything he told me that day. I remember every moment.
He grabbed my thigh and smiled and I remember everything felt like it froze there for a hell of long time lol. He told me to 'Scoot' over a bit. He played his own interpretation of Sonata No. 11, and I remember watching and listening to him play and being in such awe, then he started singing, it was definitely a magical experience. I was so excited I ended up getting a boner through my shorts.
By the time he was done I yelled out of excitement "that was so cool!!" he started laughing and he put his hand on...
>>703272480
No, you didn't
>>703272528
fucking kys
I fucked Pat Benetar back in 81 or so. Yes, I am an old fuck.
>>703259853
back when I was 14 I had a huge crush on a musician.
I tried to kill myself to one of their songs (lmao).
Anyway, flash forward to last year when I was 20.
Met the musician at a bar, we chatted for a bit. Actually became facebook friends.
And then a year later we fucked in a hotel.
Wasn't as good as I had hoped.
>>703272068
WTF is "golden time"? like Golden Girls time?
>>703272866
No, you didn't
>>703272875
No, you didn't
>>703259853
in a similar thread some aussie anon claimed he fked margot robbie when she wasnt well known yet
>the lies people tell to impress random strangers on teh internet
>>703272262
Donald, don't you have a campaign to derail or something?
>>703272632
So we get to talking and she's really nice. Invites me up to her suite. Long story short, she seemed kind of needy and I've loved her work forever, so I fucked her out of respect for her oeuvre.
>>703273015
>margot robbie has never had sex before
the lies some of you believe to feel better about your banal lives
>>703266631
You aren't David Allan Coe.
>>703260408
Any chance of the sister getting into porn?
>>703273119
Oh, you rascal
>>703272934
After 12 hours Teamsters make double time. They can make more than an assistant director.
>>703273119
touché
>>703259853
Had a threesome with trump and hillary,
>Met McLovin at a college house party a couple years ago, maybe 2011 or 2012.
>Any who, he brought a couple kegs to the party and was doing a fuck ton of coke.
>Went to the restroom upstairs and saw some chick giving him a blow job
>Asked if I wanted in on this I said yeah thinking I was gunna get my dick sucked by this chick
>he wanted me to join her and do him
>I walked away and went downstairs back to the party. Told no one.
>>703269971
/b in a nutshell. You said it, man
>>703272875
femanon detected
greentext your story
>>703271076
Glad someone isn't a newfag.
>>703272412
>at a club
>she was there
>I walked up to her and said hey
>she said I want ur dick big boi
>k
>fucked
>sacrificed a small child for satan
>satan appears
>they seem to know each other quite well
That's all I feel like typing rn
>>703273119
yeah one of the hottest female stars in hollywood certainly had sex with this one /b/ tard who coincidentally saw a celeb thread and went on to tell us about it
>>703272970
Righto, mate. Sucks that other people have had more interesting lives than you, doesn't it.
>>703259853
No and every reply in this thread is a fucking lie. The probability of fucking a celebrity is so low that the number of replies in this thread means that I'm getting my dick sucked by Katy Perry right now.
>>703273529
celebrities sexy slutty photos
new blog of slutty celebrities
www.lokysmile.com
>>703273368
hahahaha
REKT
>>703273529
i believe it
I fucked Monica Lewinsky many times in early 2000s. Our first date she turned to me and warned me never to ask about the scandal. I remember getting a blowjob from her once and i was so humming hail to the chief in my head - lol. Believe it or not she was a top tier fuck. Bill definitly was punching out of his weight class.
>>703273657
Nope
>>703273653
>one of the hottest female stars in hollywood
she has the build of a refrigerator kek
>>703273799
No, you didn't
>>703269731
Yeah but I already have herpes and hpv too, so really I'm not too worried
>>703273063
just checked out a video of her winning an Oscar for Best Supporting Actress in '72... I think I'd fuck her now too, just because she was hot back then. Nice job making a woman feel good, anon.
>>703270839
>>703272653
He started laughing and put his hand on my knee. I saw him look down a bit, I never realized until a few years later why he advanced me, but yeah I'm pretty certain so my boner. He started rubbing my thigh up and down and just QUICKLY and once brushed his hand on my erection. while saying "Well... One day you will be able to play just like that, or even better" he winks at me. I thought that was strange.
It was just me and him in the room, and it honestly felt like a fucking long time while he had his hand on my thigh. He just kept smiling and staring and occasionally and looking down. When I was excited I use to automatically pulsate my cock, and it was pretty prominent through my shorts. And I think he took that as a signal.
"I could teach you more if you'd like" and I excitedly responded "yeah that would be awesome!!!" "Alright, I'll see if I can in a bit okay?" "Okay". I left the room, the next student came in.
I remember the whole school watch him leave the grounds and the paparazzi was outside taking photos of him as he got into a limousine. I was kind of disappointed because I thought I was going to see him again to teach me piano.
Later that day I finished school and I kid you not... the motherfucker had been staying there all day waiting for me... creepy as fuck. He followed me home, but I was young and oblivious to stranger danger. I just took opportunities and did things as they went. I was half way home on an empty street in broad daylight when an SUV with tinted windows drives by. I thought.... Okay weird, not usually many nice cars like that around here.
The window rolls down, and surprise surprise it was Elton John in the back of a Sedan. "hey Anon, do you need a ride?" I forgot to mention I was socially awkward. So I was like "umm yeah..."
We drove and talked about music, eventually arriving at his hotel. I told him my faster carers had curfew, but he told me it was all fine and it was going to be okay...
>>703274054
dude stop posting already
