Tried online dating for the first time
>take good picture of myself
>write good profile, etc.
>try to talk to a few girls in my area
>barely even get replies, and if, only rejection
>one girl writes me
>says she finds me cute
>we chat a bit
>not the most interesting girl, but better than nothing
>doesn't have a profile pic, just some flower instead
>ask her for pic
>she declines, says she wants to meet up instead
>think she might be a bit ugly, but maybe she's really nice or whatever
>agree to go on a date with her
>ask how to recognize her
>she tells me she's "wearing a red sweatter with a white heart on it. Also, she's a bit chubby"
>meet up
>watch door for her
>suddenly, it's happening
>a gigantic behemoth of a woman enters the café
>my coffee gets pulled toward her due to gravitation
>fuckdat
>run to toilet
>text her that I'm stuck in traffic
>peek outside, she still pulls everything towards her
>text her again that something came up and that I'm not gonna make it
>even ask if she has time the next day, to act interested
>time passes, she won't leave
>occassional peeking reveals she ordered a whole cake
>hours pass, she is at cake nr. 2 right now
>evening, the café is about to close
>she's the last to leave
>30 minutes later, I get out of the toilet
>dude working there is surprized, but really chill once I explain
>go home, play Overwatch
Never gonna do that shit again.
Pic related, closest to her mass that I found
>>700362324
what the hell is that an image of?
>>700363466
I think it's a jellyfish, I was wondering the same thing.
ahahaha well played
>>700363466
A dead whale inflating because of putrefaction gases
>>700363678
It's a whale corpse, bloated with gas, IIRC
>>700362324
Don't be stupid, obviously the ones who don't show pic have something wrong with them.
>>700363829
that's what I thought. wasn't sure though.
>>700362324
bump, this thread needs more attention.
>>700363780
>>700363829
Thanks.
>>700363466
Pretty sure it's a whale. It's upside down and bloated as fuck.
The stripey part would be the area under it's jaw and along it's belly area.
>>700364012
dont be stupid its his date that an hero when no show
>>700363466
it's a dead bloated whale
I love how nobody is reading OP's post, we're just looking at the dead whale.
>>700362324
You should have fucked her.
>>700362324
Great story! Well told OP!
the advantage of chubby girl is that it's good to hug
>>700362324
I once met this giant whale of a woman through some friends at a bar who was into me.
>Giant fat woman
>twice the size of me
>Giant head
>No tits
>fuckthat.jpg
>kept telling me she had a great personality
>No enough booze in the world to make me fuck her
>>700362324
That shit happened to me once, except I got stuck with her.
>use tinder for the first time
>match with decent looking girl
>she looked like she was at the lighter side of chubby
>ilikethickpuss
>we talk for a bit, really cool girl
>one day later, she gives me her phone number and ask me to call her, she is bored
>has adorable accent, I am pulled in
>meet for date, I'm walking around town looking for her
>"i'm on the bench near ****** street"
>look
>only one bench unoccupied
>fatass
>she spots me
>i awkwardly walk with her, as she comments on how I'm "fitter" than she expected
>i notice she has face piercings and fucking braces
>grossed out, but carry on
>we go to a nice coffee shop, sit down outside since she smokes
>she starts fucking shooting the shit
>she talks so much shit about her friends, super negative ho
>starts talking about feminism and glorifying it
>nope.sfm
>suddenly four of my friends come, and I just wanna hide, but I sit that out too
>they sit down with us and greet and everything, I know they're just holding in their laughs
>i sit through it barely saying anything
>pretend to get important text and say I have to go
>never seen that bitch since
Been there done that
>Chatting up a 7/10 girl on POF
>Pic looked pretty good, not "chubby" but wasn't crazy skinny
>Agree to setup a date to get dinner and a movie
>I get to the restaurant early, so I get a table
>bout 10 mins after I sit down she waddles up
>Looks like she gained 75 pounds from her picture
>It's november and she's wearing torn jeans,not the fashionable torn in the knee/thigh, but the back of the heel torn up
>flip flops that you'd see people wearing in public showers for hygienic reasons
>Bright red UFC sweatshirt with a real tree camo shirt under it
>no make up, different ear rigns in each ear
>hair all fucked up
>wtf.jpg
>I'm taken aback because she looks nothing like her pics
>Que awkward dinner of me giving just enough into the conversation to keep things going while she scarfs her burger
>Scoffs at me ordering a beer at a bar/grill because she doesn't drink
>Fuck you bitch, I'm a grown ass man, if I wanna have a beer I will
>End dinner, she really wants to go see the movie, I don't even remember what it was
>Sit awkwardly through some 2 hour movie
>Kept trying to touch my hand during the movie, etc
>Movie ends, walk her to car, she drives off
>go home and drink heavily
>Next day, get a text "You got mad props for not trying anything with me last night, you're a real gentleman"
>Kept texting me every day trying to get me to go over to her house and have dinner with her family, or take her little siblings to the park with her.
I learned my lesson boys, now I always meet women somewhere public that I can sit off to the side and watch them walk in, and bail if need be. That or get them to send me a selfie or some shit like that the day before we meet up, or the morning of.
>>700362324
>tfw wanting to date a grill via interwebs
>search on profiles
>see an cute girl
>she's chubby
>doesn't matter I need something to cuddle with
>read her profile
>"I only date tall guys, well built, also one that treats me like a princess and buys me whatever I want"
>close the tab
>start searching for waifus
Feminism has fuckin ruined women, you can't even share love from one to another. All women can offer is a fat ass, fat tits, and a wet pussy, that's it.
No woman would die for a guy (except if you're famous and handsome).
I got catfish once.
Met a girl online.
Talked for a week and had a real connection.
We decided it's time to met up.
She came up to me at the bar.
Introduced herself and asked for my name.
I said, " yes. You don't look like your profile pic."
She made the the infamous argument, "I didn't realize looks were more important than our connection."
That get me worked up.
I look her in the eye, " you lied to me about your appearance. You violated my trust in you. I can not start a relationship based on lying. If you lie about your appearance, I can't not start to phantom what else you can lie about."
I walk away.
Call some male and female friends and stay in bar.
I see the beast hovering near by the whole night
>>700364715
Life is to short to waste your time being polite about this shit. You will never get that lost time back again
I haven't been on many dates, anons, but what is it with short girls being demon spawn 9 times out of 10?
>beginning of 8th grade, long ago
>Meet girl at school one time
>She's like 4'11"
>Still in my grade, but whatever
>Start talking to her for like a week, she gives me here phone number
>Ask her out, says yes, blah blah blah
>Take her to movies
>Acts super sweet the whole time, all is good
>the following day asks me if I wanna go to this one local theme park
>duh, say yes
>mom insists my dad go with since her dad is a fucking hippie vegan stoner creep
>not even making that up, this guy was sketchy
>she totally changes from then on out, acts super bitchy, chewing me out
>say fuck it, we're over
I think I dodged a bullet there
>>700365936
I'd say I'm a decent looking girl. I've dated a guy and did everything I could to keep him satisfied (including sexually). He never gave a shit about me, treated me like shit, generally was a bitch towards me. I didn't leave him for the longest time because it didn't matter to me, I loved him anyways. You were probably around girls who simply are idiotic and illogical. Once you get a girl to fall in love with you, you could fuck up countless times and she would still love you the same! Yay
>>700366525
That is true, yet for some reason people tend to think its okay to lie to make themselves feel better. I myself am generally interested in what happened with you and him
>>700362324
Nigga one rifle shot and the fucking whale will destroy pearl harbor a second time
>>700366525
Not true without pics w/ timestamp
>>700366525
imo I just think I've had shit luck with previous relationships.
Either that or I'm fuckin ugly. I think it's more towards the ugly part.
Not to mention, I'm somewhat tired of having to do the entire scenario just so I "impress" women, or act up so they fall for me, just so in the end I have to beg for them to say "I love you".
Feels like now day's culture is oriented in a very odd way, I can't understand so I just simply gave up.
>>700366722
Well. Me being a very unstable person, I get attached to people easily. This guy was emotionless, kinda silly and generally not interesting at all to be with. I have no clue why, but I fell in love with him. So we talked more and more blah blah, we got together. I knew he was never going to give a shit about the way I felt, so I always had to keep my feelings to myself. I made him laugh, enjoy himself and have a good time. He never complained about anything, and I was glad to see him doing well. But see, it's very difficult to ignore panic attacks, severe paranoia and mood swings. So sometimes I'd lose it and "break" at him. The way he handled my behavior was careless, emotionless and disturbingly obnoxious. I'd tell him that I felt very bad, and he'd throw a "its ok".. I don't know. I was forced to act like I was into what he was sexually just to keep him with me. I loved him so much and I really did everything I could to have him with me
>>700367144
Speaking from a girls perspective, looks don't matter when someone loves you for who you are. You could be disabled, a complete asshole (like my ex), or absolutely hideous. If a girl truly loves you, she will look pass every flaw, and try to make you feel the best.
>>700367225
Well i promise if you were my girlfriend i would actually care. My girlfriend loves me and says i treat her well
>>700367225
>I loved him so much and I really did everything I could to have him with me
yeah, I know how it feels to give your last piece of sanity to that person, only to find out they don't give two fucks about it.
like I said
>>700367144
I gave up, I used to think "love" was something beyond our realm, but in the end it just turned out to "chemicals in our brain that guides us towards mating".
>>700367417
Maybe in the movies.
In real life and in my country, if you don't have money and if you're not athletic, you have 0 chances.
Not only that but you can even see and feel their disgust towards you.
>>700362324
2008
>Home on leave from Iraq
>willing to fuck almost anything
>hook up site, message EVERY girl in the area
>few replies, mostly just polite getting to know me stuff
>bitch! I wanna fuck!
>Im getting drunk as the monday night draga on
>profile with no pic responds to me
>she says: likes to work out, just got back from a run, willing to fuck tonight
>ok come on over!
>giant blob of a woman shows up
>fml n too deep now...gotta think fast
>genious idea! DRINK TILL SHE IS HOT
>Im doing shots of Jack while I talk to her and wonder how long my floor can support her
>finish bottle, hammer drunk
>look at her...."you gotta go"
there was not enough booze to make her look good.
>>700367225
Sahara?
>>700364126
Confirmed.
>>700366222
>" you lied to me about your appearance. You violated my trust in you. I can not start a relationship based on lying. If you lie about your appearance, I can't not start to phantom what else you can lie about."
What sort of autist delivers speeches at people? Cut down on the anime faggot.
>>700367616
>>700367616
I really want you guys to bare with me on this. Not all girls are the same, there are women out there who are decent looking, have amazing personalities and would love to make you happy. Just because you haven't found the right one yet, doesn't mean they don't exist. My ex told me he couldn't believe I was a real person, but I could say the same to him. I couldn't believe how someone is so cruel and heartless. Anyways, hang there anon, you'll find the right girl for you!
>>700367225
Well hey atleast you get to have fun with people every so often, instead of being a complete fuck and ignoring peoples feelings
>>700362324
you story is shit but your image is fucking as fucky :D.
>>700368118
tits or gtfo
Simply agree to meet in public place, plenty of distance between you, wait for both to nod acceptance or either shake head for 'no way, get fucked, fuck off' in a polite way and leave.
>>700363466
Dead bloated whale, that's the bottom jaw/neck area all filled with gas
>>700368252
Sad thing is these people cannot understand that what they do/think/say hurts others. I tried to talk to him about this 3 times, and he always thought I did it to "blame" him. I'd say something along the lines of "I'm sorry, you don't have to care, but please for once, try to care.. It hurts seeing you like this", and he would freak out and get all defensive and delusional.
> Be me browsing women seeking men on Craigslist
> Ad with cute faced girl, can't see body pic wants someone to go over and cuddle for the night
> OK
> Hit her up, text for a few hours, sends address and wants me to go over
> Get there butch is gigantic. I'm 6ft3 with long as arms and couldn't get them around her
> Walk inside house is fucking disgusting and smells like wet dog
> Tell her I'm going to grab a cigarette before we lay down
> Hop in my car and haul ass
> Texts me "Why did you leave?"
> No response
> I don't even smoke.
>meet girl on POF
>easily 250lbs despite trying to hide it in pics
>cute face, massive tits, huge ass
>could easily be 8-9/10 if she dropped a hundred pounds or more
>go out, she is obviously thirsty
>fuck that night, surprisingly clean pussy, let me cum inside
>see each other more, shes getting attached
>starts realizing I only want to bang
>banging one night, pussy is extra wet
>somethings not right
>bitch fucking peed on me while fucking
>whole bedroom reeks of piss
>kick her out, have to replace sheets and mattress
>havent seen her since
>still fap to her from time to time
>have a massive chubby/bbw fetish to this day
>>700368118
Mathematically speaking those girls with that mind and attitude are about as rare as 1/10000000. Congrats on being one of them, now for me to find a girl who would sacrifice as much as I would for a strong love, I'd say the odds are against me.
She's either taken, or somewhere thousands of kilometers far from me.
Not only that, the age gap might vary, and if she's even interested in me, there would be no way in hell I'd meet her.
There is no point in having hope for something that will never happen.
>>700368026
He probably plays Reaper a lot
>>700368118
tits or gtfo, unless you're a homo then kys
>>700369082
I understand anon. But hey, since you're willing to sacrifice everything for true love, they could be kilometres away, you could still meet them and have the greatest future you'd ever imagine. Trust me anon, I know this seems generic, but you have to work to get what you're after. If you ever truly love a girl, and see a possibility of being with her, give it a go, it could be worth it! (She could even take the risk and find you instead!)
>>700367225
Whoa there, Mackenzie
>>700368026
it's a good way to get an uggo to fuck off, especially if you don't give a fuck what people think of you
>>700368953
Haha, i like your style. Definitely going to keep the cigarette excuse in mind if i ever need to pull that card. Thanks anon
>>700366525
I'd agree with you, but you clearly don't know the rules...
>>700369048
I think it time you killed yourself.
>>700368023
Reminds me of these
>>700368492
That won't kill you to talk 5 minutes with her even if she ain't hot you know, her friends might be
>>700366525
You sound like a terrific girl anon. What part of the country you live in? Fl. here.
>>700369531
I did. Just so she could spend money on a guy who now cheats on her, and possibly hits her.
I gave her everything, and we're not just talking about money or material things, for nothing.
So... butt fuck it. There is NO such thing about love. Stop bullshitting yourself, you're going to end up very very hurt and possibly in a worse sanity than what you are atm.
Just, adapt yourself to what humanity has become. Leave "love" to fairy tales and movies.
>>700368698
Yup its terrible what people do, im sorry but my dog farted while i was reading your post and omg was it loud XD
>>700362324
Somewhat similar story here, online dating is a disaster. Girl I met online was only 17, didn't tell me til after I went over to her place to probably fuck. Thankfully told me before hand, her house was dirty, dog piss in her bedroom and food everywhere. Turned out to be giant land whale, and smelled like rotten onions and piss. It was disgusting. Deleted my profile and blocked her number when I got home.
>>700370030
this right here. I've gotten laid by some of the hottest bitches in my life by just being cool to the fat friend. they aren't stupid and know when you are out of their league and will hook you up with their friends.
>>700364303
If only you could get your arms around her first.
>>700365324
it's instant dating, so yeah you'll hit a few ugly people because it helps them find each other. It's all about your tastes and hers, if they don't somehow match it's over before it begins. You can have a one night stand but it's really not worth it,
bump for more stories and more pep talking from that adorably naively optimistic girl
>>700363466
lol found this while searching image
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7X0hq0ug9q4
>>700368026
>can't not start to phantom
how2english?
>>700370256
That's so sad anon, and I really am sorry you had to go through that shit. Yeah, you have the right to give up on love honestly. I still want you to have just a small little hope, that the right one will find you. You took the risk and it ended up badly, but I'm sure someone would feel the same passion as you, and go through all that instead of yourself. I'm glad to see that you're not selfless, and are aware of things that may harm you more. Love is all about risks, really. But there's always someone who's worth a chance out there anon. Again, so sorry it ended up like this. Life can be a bitch sometimes.
>>700365324
I had something like this happen too. Getting talked down to by a landwhale because I ordered a beer. what the fuck is wrong with bitches?
>>700368953
Kek
>>700362324
Similar thing happened to me.
>Met at applebees
>She didnt look like her pics
>She was way fatter
>I continued the date like nothing
>At end of date took her to abandoned parking lot
>Put her to suck my cock and came on her fat tits
>Went home happy
>I blocked her number and her profile on OKC.
THE END.
Damn as long you have that whale picture you are all set for life.
>>700363466
Looks like the top half of a giant nautilus
Right?
>>700371074
>applebees
you knew what you were getting into.
>>700371246
yea, I didnt care, i got my cock sucked for a couple drinks.
>>700368026
>Virgin detected
That's the best way to make your point to a woman
>>700368398
Does that rule apply in this context?
>>700370951
Didn't come here for feels.
>>700368118
God I so hate when faggots say this untrue shit
You don't even know this guy how could you even say that?
>>700366525
You sound like an easy bitch, you're no better than stuck up bitches, just the other side of the spectrum.
>>700366222
"I cannot start to phantom what else you can lie about."
Please tell me you actually said this.
>>700371616
Because I don't have to know someone's life story to understand how shitty they felt/feel and try to make their day better. But of course, let's not forget this is 4chan, and everyone has to be a massive cock to eachother for whatever reason.
>>700367534
Beta alert
>>700369082
They're that rare to you because you have nothing to offer.
Would you waste time with you?
>>700368026
Virgin Beta Fag Alert
>>700371825
Your a fucking moron if you actually believe in that fantasy shit you said, go read some more horoscopes, you faggot
>>700363947
/thread
>>700370256
That "divorced dad edge"
So original
>>700371680
So your logic is:
>girl with feelings, willing to go through anything to keep her lover happy
>easy bitch
If it's so easy to find people who think the way I do, find yourself a girl/guy who is going to make you feel like you're worth something, instead of sitting on your ass and complain about how easy everything is.
>>700372018
Don't be such an asshole dude, you don't always have to try to tear down people in this world.
>>700370951
Don't encourage his self-pity. He doesn't get better that way.
>>700370560
You narrowly avoided a Chris Hansen moment.
>>700367748
You gotta go...
I lold
>>700372146
You don't have to go around spreading false hope either faggot
>>700371616
>>700371825
Because
>
He/she gives me a little hope to keep on fighting I guess.
>>700371949
But I have offered more than I thought I would.
>>700372056
I wish I had gotten married at least.
>>700372183
He wouldn't get better at all if he wasn't self aware, trust me. More people need to adapt his way of thinking, and put themselves first, or end up being used, just how I did because I don't care about myself.
>>700363678
Its a whale you fucking faggot
>>700371549
Is that clannad?
>>700362324
No pic, no click...
Shit, you're doing better than me, OP.... I've had a profile on a few sites for years now, and still nothing but rejection and fat/hideous women... I mean, I know I'm ugly, but I'm not THAT ugly.... Online dating is a sham.
>>700365936
That's a pretty broad statement. I don't like feminism either but I've been friends with lots of girls who don't even give a shit about that sort of thing. I've even been friends with a feminist and managed to show her how wrong most of them are. She's still a liberal cunt, but she's not sexist against men or women anymore.
Women aren't alien beings out to hurt you, they're people with their own emotions. I feel like I should be explaining this to a preschooler but I'm actually explaining it to a neckbearded man child.
>>700362324
>Ever going on a date with someone without seeing a picture of them first
Absolutely Haram.
Literally no valid excuse for this on either end in an age where almost everyone has a camera phone.
You motherfuckers are just asking to get Catfished with this shit. And anyone who trusts profile pictures is a dummy.
Timestamped picture or video chat or we don't meet in real life, them's the rules. That's how you keep the fatties and dudes away.
>>700372097
truthbomb right here xD
anyway i dont know guys... i personally gave up on dating and started focusing on growing weed, losing weight and working out. So far lost 25 pounds, but still got another 100 to go before I'm fairly happy about myself.
perhaps ill start dating again, but frankly i don't see the point because everyone's so shallow it's nuts. Even when I start again; it'll probably just be to wet my beak because I just don't believe there are many serious girls at online dating sites.
>>700369819
no regerts famalam
>>700367417
I don't think that's every girl I think that's just your personality shining through
>>700371825
I'll be your massive cock.
>>700370256
Sorry to tell you this but you loved the wrong person too much and are now using the blanket statement love isnt real to rationalize it. Obviously love is a chemical attraction but our brains are just a bunch of fucking nerves that react to chemicals.
>>700372514
I completely agree, I don't think most girls would accept someone no matter what.
>>700372423
>Women aren't alien beings out to hurt you
I don't think you really grasp the concept.
I'm not the center of the universe, I'm not someone who NEEDS to be loved, I'm just another person. I was hoping that women should know this too.
>>700372565
>you loved the wrong person too much
>person
I got fucked by more than one.
>>700364715
>ilikethickpuss
>>700365936
Hah! YOU NO CATCH LEGOMAN!
i tried everything i can think of including online dating and craigslist. Can't find a woman I find attractive that finds me attractive and is single. Last night was the last straw and I have given up on finding someone.
>>700367225
>Kept my feelings to myself.
Pray tell, for how long did he ask you what was wrong as you just drew further and further apart?
>>700372514
>>700372695
I can't promise that every girl who you'll be with will see pass your flaws. But I'm pretty sure once a girl truly loves you, flaws, insecurities etc won't matter.
>>700367225
Do you live in SC?
>>700372908
He never asked. He actually never asked because he was never interested in my feelings in the first place. I'd always ask him, but I wasn't expecting him to do aswell.
>>700363466
A decomposing whale
>>700372437
Seems like you forgot your pic anon, but no worries
I got ya
>>700369082
Based anon is based.
Yes, awesome people do indeed exist. However, they are so few and far between, and 99.9% of them are snatched up and married to some douchefuck shithole cock mongler by the time they're 19-20...
>>700371949
Then explain how douchebags with nothing to offer, and wouldn't offer if they did, are usually not single...
>>700367225
Sounds awfully familiar... Was it your first relwtionship and his?
You guys would get pissy and butthurt if OP was a girl meeting up a fat guy. But no, it's funny because she's fat! You fucking peice of shit excuse for a person, you realize she ate those two cakes because she knew you must've saw her and ran and that's the only way she knows how to cope. I bet she's still depressed about it. Maybe suicidal
I wouldve done the same thing as you, OP
>>700372344
I miss iroh so much, good gif man
>>700372746
I see I see, I missed what you were getting at friend.
Unfortunately I'm only good at giving condescending advice and making people feel bad about themselves. If I had any other advice I'd give it to you. Sorry friendo.
The only thing I can think of is to hold back when dating. Don't look for people's pros, look for their cons, that way when you see them when you first meet and won't be surprised about seeing them in the future. You also probably won't be trapped in said relationship because you can call it off earlier if you see any red flags.
Terrible advice, I know, but all I got famalamadingdong.
>>700368953
>>700366222
>Phantom
(He's a phantom. Danny Phantom)
Yo, Danny Fenton, he was just fourteen
when his parents built a very strange machine
It was designed to view a world unseen
(He's gonna catch 'em all cause he is Danny Phantom)
When it didn't quite work, his folks they just quit
Then Danny took a look inside of it
There was a great big flash, everything just changed
His molecules got all rearranged
(Phantom, phantom)
When he first woke up he realized
He had snow white hair and glowing green eyes
He could walk through walls disappear and fly
He was much more unique than the other guys
It was then that he knew what he had to do
He had to stop all the ghosts that were commin' through
He's here to fight for me and you!
He's gonna catch 'em all cause he is Danny Phantom
Gonna catch 'em all cause he is Danny Phantom
Gonna catch 'em all cause he's (Danny Phantom)
>>700370951
You know, not everyone needs hope. Some people like life better without the ups and downs of hope and disappointment.
>>700373106
Thanks Famalambalamps. I needed that one!
>>700373228
land whale detected
>>700373228
>imblying fat neckbeards aren't also the topic of ridicule and the only people who would be salt would be other hambos
Lol are you new, friend?
>>700373154
Honestly anon, you make me feel better about that breakup. I'd probably end up marrying someone who would mentally abuse me and make me feel forced into things. There is no real explanation why that's happening. Its luck on one end of the pair, and love on the other.
>>700373536
Spotted the stoician
>>700364639
>fat with no tits
might as well burn her for fuel
>>700373056
Sorry about that then. Just came back to a stripped clean apartment, despite me trying to figure out and fix things. That last bit lasted about a bloody year.
Been on POF recently to see what's out there
>Sign up, start browsing the stock
>Every single one is a single mother
>walesUK.exe I guess
>Every one of them says some variation of "my son/daughter/baby is my world/comes first"
Seriously, if their children are so important, they'd have stuck with the father.
>>700373497
Underrated kek
>>700373743
Been called an existentialist, a cynic and a nihilist. This was new.
>>700366222
>phantom
it's fathom you sperglord
>>700373154
Fucking preach
>>700373818
Just wait some time anon, in some weeks, things will get better. Also no need to apologise, if I saw a post like this I'd say the exact same thing. But trust me, things get better overtime.
>>700366222
>I can't not start to phantom
>I'm starting to phantom
>>700373978
That wasn't negative, it's a pretty cool school of thought
Waiting for the rest of the anons to realize they're talking to a guy.
Still no tits, still no gtfo.
THIS IS 4CHAN.
>>700371496
Yeah. She started with "I am a girl..."
>>700373453
Probably an advice from who once too felt the way I am feeling now.
Still, we must stay strong, after all nothing really matters in an anonymous board.
>>700374177
>>700374233
didn't realize this had become a dubs thread
>>700369048
>bringing the whale back to where you live
That was mistake number one
>>700374239
>after all nothing really matters in an anonymous board.
dont even need to quantify it like that
nothing matters
>>700374177
Rule applies to attention seekers, with gender not being relevant to the conversation.
>>700373936
It just means they are looking for a new dad. my wifes son is not a meme.
>>700374177
I'm not a guy, and I've seen all those shitposting replies. I'm not here to get nude and be known as an idiot. Most people here have issues with women, and have lost hope in finding a lover. There's a really bad name on women due to most of them not being the right ones, or simply obnoxiously moronic. Snap out of your 12 year old mindset, and try to focus on people who are trying to help, instead of drooling front of your computer expecting nude pictures from someone who has no intent of doing this.
>>700366525
If I pretend to listen to your bullshit, could I fuck you a few times before I get bored and disappear?
>>700374290
'Tis now
>>700374374
Not relevant??
It is giving advice about relationships "attempting" to give OP and other neckbeards faith in women...
Women are out of their fucking minds.
And this one ain't proving itself.
Ok now its time for my story
>be me
>be 21 years old, 3 years ago
>Long-term gf just broke up with me
>At coffee shop trying to think of how to get my shit together
>notice cute girl is has been looking at me for some time
>smile at her and wave a little
>go back to staring at my coffee
>lock up to see her sitting next to me
>asks me what’s wrong
>little reluctant, think it’s a trick
>It isn’t
>feelsgoodman.jpg
>she was dumped recently too
>accidentally stare at her cleavage as she’s talking
>start to get hard
>feel a hand run up my leg
>see her breathing a bit hard
>asks if I like what I see
>guide her hand to my zipper
>she unzips my fanny pack by mistake
>spaghetti falls out
>try to clean it up with my sock
>start to cry
>get embarrassed and fart watery diarrhea all over my man skirt
>smear shit all over the window and ask her to marry me
>mfw she said no
>>700362324
this didn't happen.
you're more beta than I thought. can't even reject a fat girl when the time comes
also what coffee shop sells whole fucking cakes.
thanks for the laugh though, OP
>>700374553
>I'm not a guy
>I'm not here to get nude
then GTFO, you stupid bitch
now I see why no one loves you
>>700374609
Looks like dubs were on hold
>>700374553
Less talking, more timestamped titties.
>>700374625
really makes you think
>>700374239
Nah, I've only felt sadness and grief from one person and i got over it the next day.
I've seen what people have done to my friends and other people, fuels a lot of hatred to see my friends that sad, know what I'm saying?
I know it seems really gay, but I've seen what some people can do and how far some people are willing to go to hurt someone else and it's fucking brutal, so I kinda try not to get myself too involved with people who put me off.
I'd tell a story, though a few of my friends browse this board a lot and they could find out, so not gonna do that.
>>700374625
lel'd
>>700374625
subtle. I like it
aight here goes.
>be me 22 yrs old, metalhead (not relevant)
>found hot goth chick online, she's 18.
>we text and flirt for a few months and we develop a "love-connection".
>We're like teenage raging hormone in love.
>She lives in the north of my country I live in the south.
>one day I look at a train.
>my wallets got a quite a few bucks, fuck it I'm jumping on the train to see my love.
>I run out of money 500miles before her town.
>I'm a spontaneous idiot apparently.
>stuck
>hitchhike
>I finally arrive, she lives with her mother apparently.
>She's a bit taller than she said, ah well.
>I shower, eat, and we fuck like rabbits.
>after a few days of just fucking and sleeping and then fucking some more her mom wants a meeting.
>Her mom and her argue in front of me.... about me....
>Suddenly her mom blurts out "but you're not even 16 yet how is this going to work".
>I didn't care she lived with her mom up until now because at 18 you're considered an independent adult in my country and she had told me she was 18.
>I suddenly realize I'm a 22 yr old dude who has been fucking her 15 year old daughter for almost a week.
>15 yr gf is a screamer...
>I don't even remember how I got out of it.
pic related, somehow found her pic on goog
>>700374625
Yeah women suck how could she say no fuck em all I hope they die
>>700373936
This!
>>700374750
I believe you, I know because I've had thoughts about fucking shit up.
>>700362324
online dating is shit for males. only desprate faggots use that shit. women hold all the power and you see entitled fatties curving dudes on there they would have no chance with in real life.
>>700374553
>157 replies
>ctrl+f tits or gtfo
>2 results.
This place really has changed. but seriously do you think your advise is helpful to anyone? you just keep saying the right one is out there for you in different iterations. tits or gtfo unless you have some genuinely good advise.
>>700374542
Maybe some. But too many are just after the d. In wales single mothers lose benefits (welfare) if they shack up with a guy.
>>700363466
Google search the image, dumbass.
>>700365936
I stopped reading the thread to go watch HPC.
>>700373936
>stuck with the father
>implying father isn't black and disappeared
it usually isn't the bitch's choice the father doesn't stick around.
>>700374877
Quality post
>>700362324
Well... seems like it would have been quicker to just stick it out like a man.
>>700374849
How the fuck did you run out of money on your way there?
>>700374614
Agreed all women care crazy, have no integrity, and will fuck you over in some way at some point.
>>700374931
>Advise
Noun: advice
Verb: advise
Anon: illiterate nigger
>>700374931
If the definition of "advise" is finding you a perfect girlfriend with huge ass and tits I'm deeply sorry, I cannot provide you that. Want my "advise" to matter? Get out there, and take that huge risk I'm talking about. I'm not going to chew your food for you. Want things to work out in your life? Do something about it.
>>700374614
Chill, I'm advocating against the honoured tradition of " tits or gtfo " in this case. If she's actually a she, I'm well aware she is telling the other side of the story.
>>700374931
>>157 replies
>to the thread
>3 replies to that post
>with 2 saying gtfo or timestamp+tits
>1 of them yours
you don't know how to ignore shit do you. you probably didn't even sage the thread, newfag
>>700374625
>>700363466
A dead whale with stretch marks.
I've got one.
>get message on PoF from older lady
>pics remind me of my fave playmate ever, Petra Verkiak
>talk for a while
>she's not a retard, so I agree to meet
>small Italian restaurant
>I arrive early and talk to the bartendress for about 15 mins
>tell her I'm there on a blind date
>mention that I hope she's not fat
>can't do fat women
>after a while I feel tap on my shoulder
>bartendress' eyes widen
>I turn around to behold a manatee that clearly learned to live on land
>am polite, and don't end the date there
>order food
>I get a small dish
>the sea cow gets all you can eat spaghetti with extra sauce and cheese
whothefuckdoesthatonafirstdate.png
>proceeds to inhale that entire plate and order another
>takes 3 bites out of the second one
>asks for to-go box
whattheactualfuckamiseeing.avi
>leave
>never respond to her again
My friends think she just wanted a free meal.
>>700375081
Bitches have an obligation to their future children to find a decent guy and attain a solid relationship before getting knocked up
>>700375081
It's usually IS the bitches fault the guy's not around
>>700374931
Let's change the lake of Tits or GTFO. Men and women of this thread. TITS OR GTFO. TITS OR GTFO. TITS OR GTFO. TITS OR GTFO. TITS OR GTFO. TITS OR GTFO. TITS OR GTFO. OR GTFO. TITS OR GTFO. TITS OR GTFO. TITS OR GTFO. TITS OR GTFO. TITS OR GTFO. TITS OR GTFO. OR GTFO. TITS OR GTFO. TITS OR GTFO. TITS OR GTFO. TITS OR GTFO. TITS OR GTFO. TITS OR GTFO. OR GTFO. TITS OR GTFO. TITS OR GTFO. TITS OR GTFO. TITS OR GTFO. TITS OR GTFO. TITS OR GTFO.
Okay instead of slut shaming the one supposed girl in here I'll give my two cents of dating sites.
>Try OKC/POF/Match
>Meet several girls, most have children, most post an old photo of them when they were something, now they've just given up.
>Date 3 girls for several months one from each site basically...
>All fall through for varying reasons, probably because I wont pay for all their shit.
You can definitely find cool chicks... more than likely they're taken though. Have fun being stuck in that friendzone.
>>700374625
Damn, makes you wonder if life is even worth living with all the lochness monsters around to walk.
>>700373978
Stoician is probably the most accurate of all of those for what you are with that attitude my friend.
>>700375171
heres a faggot who cant make a point.
>>700375309
ever heard the saying "there are no girls on the internet"? that's because your gender doesn't matter, until some attentionwhore brings it up because they want more replies. the whole point of tits or gtfo is because you don't know it's a female. 99% of the time it's a guy just bullshitting you
>>700367225
What's your name
>>700375443
I didn't say it wasn't their fault. I said it wasn't their choice.
>>700375542
Your mom
>>700367225
What's your name
>>700375542
People used to call me "faggot" in highschool
>>700374553
Shut the fuck up cunt
>>700367225
What's your name or city
>>700375094
Thanks I worked hard on it
>>700375410
>My friends think she just wanted a free meal.
You didn't actually pay for her food, did you?
>>700375647
I'll call you a faggot now. Faggot
>>700375182
youre worthless.
>>700370223
kys
>>700375769
Where I'm from, that is customary.
>>700371074
>applebees
of course shes fat
the food is grease incarnate and expensive as fuck
but boi do i like me a breaky burger
>>700375517
Don't make me whiteknight on a fucking derailed thread mate. Attention seekers start looking their own thread.
>>700375647
youre still a faggot
>>700375542
Not that it matters, but since you're the only autist who hasn't asked for my tits, my name is Jen.
>>700376021
I dont want to see your tits tbh I wanna see your face though I wanna know if you're a qt3.14
>>700375138
yes, that's the only one thing i'm curious about this story too.
>>700375904
u first bitch
>>700375982
applebess is expensive? do you work minimum wage? lol fag
>>700373497
WEW, kek lad
>>700375138
>>700376114
Really this nigga pretty much stayed in a 15 year old girls house fucking her for days while her mom was there and you care about how the dumbass ran out of money
>>700376021
le show me le titties Jen
>>700376021
For your information its artistic. Not autistic. Now tits out for HARAMBRE!
>>700376021
Jen, do you surf b alot?
As a dude engaged to his built-ass, skinny girlfriend of 5 years he met on OKCupid less than an hour from his home town... you guys talking about how impossible shit is and "love's a fairy tale", and "All women are ruined..." You will all be Virgin betafags forever with that attitude. Yes. Procreation depends on us being attracted to each other, and there are 7 billion+ humans, half of which are female. But yes, the odds are so terribly low you'll find someone worth it. You idiots are breeding your defective mindsets out of the genepool. Thanks for your sacrifice. Buck up and try a little, bitches.
>>700376291
>>700376291
Le guys le stop you are gonna le scare le grill of my le dreams
>>700367748
>You gotta go
>>700375309
>>700375994
Yeah I know it looks like I so crave those 4chan replies, but in this case I have to mention my gender so what I'm advising you on makes sense. I'm telling you a girls side on the whole "love" topic. Of course I have to mention that I'm a female myself. If I didn't, it would actually be pointless.
>>700376284
I'm surprised he didn't get Chris Hansened.
>>700374625
Why is there a zipper on your man skirt?
>>700376319
I'm on /fit/ most of the time, only pop in to /b/ if I see a thread of interest.
>>700376284
Was his fucking wallet hooked to the train taking money every mile and when he ran out he got kicked out? I have no clue how it can happen.
>>700375138
because I'm an idiot.
I have poor impulse control and I thought the money was gonna last me longer. I think I thought trains were way cheaper than they are
>>700376427
We need at least a face pic with a timestamp or you could easily be lying
>>700376540
Tits out for HARAMBRE.
>>700376021
mfw my ex's name is Jen and I put her through some shit...
You don't live in New Jersey do you...?
>>700374931
I don't know I kinda like the occasional seriousness. I was annoyed that the raid people suggested didn't take off because of "bullying" but I don't mind the occasional thread of ranting at each other or just us being bitches.
>>700376465
Also, that's not me. But good job anon on baiting people kek. Of course, "i browse /fit/". Gotta make them hope more huh?
>>700374625
old pasta but a goodie
still kekd
>>700366222
>phantom
You could at least specter an idea of what was going on in her head. I poltergeist that it was kind of a rough place you were in but you'll ghost through.
>>700376284
Op here,
don't worry, it wasn't a quality fuck... she could have passed for 25... 183cm tall.... and haaaaaaairy!
>>700376727
Ahh. A Jewish girl. They got mad hair.
>>700368298
Kill yourself pls
>>700362324
>my coffee gets pulled toward her due to gravitation
Many keks.
I don't understand why they won't help themselves with their abnormal bodily structures. The only type of girls I get are chubby ones( I do t get with them they just look like they want to eat me), and it's disgusting. I tried one once and they all end up being feminists or total freaks, although that's one in the same. They can't control their urges, not like there's anything stopping them as societies on there very whim for fear of losing their walking, money siphoning, pocket pussies, then if anyone tries to talk to them like they would a man and tell them to grow the hell up and get a job they make up all this shit to keep up their special view of "I'm perfect just the way I am, I can do anything I want bc vagina"
>they usually have tumblrs
>usually have a whales torso and flamingoes feet
>>700376790
maybe way back in the genes but we're scandinavians... not much jewish blood here ;)
barely have any jews here in fact... muslim camel fuckers tho...
>>700376677
How do we know who's the real Jen then?
>>700366451
you're preaching to the choir bro, same thing
happend to me but i stuck through, was bat-shit crazybut honest to god the coolest, most interesting person ive yet ta meet. Worth
Also she always said short people are like that becuase they're closer to hell
>>700372746
>I got fucked by more than one.
Then you never learned your lesson or continued to date bad women.
>>700376973
>short people are like that becuase they're closer to hell
Interesting theory
>>700376972
Why does it even matter anymore? I made my point and some people heard me out. Whatever is said that's irrelevant to what I was talking about doesn't interest me.
>>700363466
>>700370885
Just imagine the smell
Chicks on OKC are the funniest. Every one of them is a single mom, all militant about how important their little bastard(s) are to them.
What guy is his right fucking mind would step in that pile of human shit?
>>700374313
wait till he finds ot he has a little fatty and a big child support debt
>>700374625
Anon. I am now laying here curled up in a ball...crying. I am physically struggling to laugh and breathe. Such a rollercoaster of emotions. Sadness then the story led to hope for you anon then it all went spuraling down into a dark dark abyss. Please help me.
>>700377100
Hell yeah and check those dubs
>>700376236
>lol
you're calling me the fag
also yes it is when you eat with 2 other people, it comes up to 60-70 bucks
guess you wouldnt know, loner
>>700377121
Nice try dude.
#TheRealJen
>>700366222
I'd give grandiose speeches like that too, if I could turn into a ghost like that.
>>700376677
But your name is Jen?
Okay i got one
>using OKC
>finally get a hit
>match with a chick who has an okay face
>only pictures of her face
>weird but whatever
>talk through message for a bit
>eventually get on skype to chat
>she turns on her web cam
>mfw shes in a motorized wheel chair
>mfw shes missing fucking fingers
>mfw shes all sorts of gimped up
>keep talking to her as i block her on everything i could think of
>delete my OKC account
Fuck this online dating crap
>>700366525
same goes for both sexes, its not male or female, its just people
>>700377362
Even black people can afford Applebees.
>>700377387
What kind of name is Jen anyways kek. I guess due to the other anon, I'll be remembered by 2-3 people as "Jen from /fit/"
>>700374553
no women love nice guys
their subconscious tells them that such guys are merely worshipers or servants, and that they can do better
girls will either friendzone nice guys to use them or date them to screw them over
now tits or gtfo
>>700367748
Lol!
>>700377450
It's actually Andrea.
>>700364191
>>700367225
Devin I left you because Yenna's pussy game was amazing. Get off steroids and try being more feminine.
>>700370885
this was probably the weirdest thing id seen before coming here all those years ago
>>700367225
LOL this happens to so mAny girls, you aint alone dont worry
>>700376910
As a fat man, I might have some insight.
We don't care enough to work out. I've been told my whole life that no one will ever like me. And my childhood bullies have been right about everything else so far. It's not worth it to do hard work just so people can hate us more. That's why fat people say "Fuck society's standards". Because society has made us feel like shit.
>>700377450
Yes, it's really Jen.
>>700377629
kek'd hard
>>700377714
You aren't at all interesting, so no one will remember you.
>>700364639
>Giant fat woman
>No tits
that's a guy
>>700377705
Hi my name is Greyson and i came to 4chan because i heard is meme factory and im 9 years old. Le derp!
>>700374625
This shit is good !
>>700367225
I told you when it started, it was only friends with benefits not my fault you caught feels
Big tits from having big fat folds is not big tits.
>>700377895
>>700377809
>>700377450
Oh god is it going to become a mini meme now? Kek. None of these are me, and I'm refusing to give out my name. Also, choose better names guys. Andrea and Jen? Really?
>>700366525
Hi! Few things to start off with =]
1. Yes I answered you because you're a femanon, 'tis an awesome thing to see!
2. I'm Brian.
3. Don't be intimidated, but I'm not a stereotypical guy. If anything, I'll be the one in the kitchen =D.
>>700378163
No IM the real Jen.
-Jen
>>700378163
For the record:
- This is (yet another) imposter
- I don't say "kek"
- I'm not giving out my name, or my tits
>>700377877
not fucking your body up by excessive eating is just about doing something for yourself. not necessarily to be liked or hated more or less. from my experience losing weight by eating less isn't that hard once you've started. and its totally worth it. living just feels better without that disgusting fat pulling you down.
>>700378311
Ya. That's a fake ass imposter because I'm Jen.
-signed the real Jen
>>700378267
>I'll be the one in the kitchen =D.
Jc, I forgot about this pasta..
>>700378001
no, fat guys have tits
>>700378283
>>700378311
Finding Jen: The hidden anon
You made my day guys.
>>700378506
Jen approves of this
>>700362324
>>go on okcupid to troll with /b/ 4 years ago
>>Message first cutie pretending to be a dick
>>shes pretty cool about the whole thing
>>2016 been married to her 2 years now
>>Just had sex 2 hours ago.
tfw i kinda found my wife thanks to /b/
>>700378407
kek, don't ever change /b/. I came here to try to give you a female's perspective. Hope it helped a little.
I'm flattered by all the imposters though.
>>700375769
I did. I had to be polite..
>>700378601
is this the first time you're posting?
>>700377877
You made yourself feel like shit society doesn't care about you
>>700365936
It’s called get a girl that’s not fucking stupid
>>700378672
Ya. I the real Jen am pretty flattered. I am disappointed that I don't have fan fiction about me yet.
- the totally legit Jen.
Reminder to ignore attention whores(jen)
Unless tits are shown
>>700378684
You don't have to be polite about anyone lying about their appearance.
Judging is "terrible" yes but lying is worse.
>>700378601
I've trolled chicks on CL. I go to major metro areas and post like I'm a wealthy guy looking for a wife. Then I try to get their nudes.
So many chicks reply, desperate to find a rich guy to latch on to.
>>700363466
OP's new girlfriend skinny dipping
>>700378672
>>700378597
I'm actually laughing so hard at these. Times like this is when I have no regrets browsing /b/. Thank you so much for making my day better
>>700378933
CHECKEM. Also. Lol
>>700378863
The best part is there still aren't any girls in this thread.
>>700374849
>metalhead (not relevant)
Then don't say it ya dingus.
Also metalheads are automatically faggots
>>700379045
I'm Jen. Im a girl.
>>700379045
true.
-jen
>>700372565
our brains are much more than that. theyre the single best computer ever made.
>>700378965
Don't flatter yourself, I'm actually the only real chick in this thread, and I'll timestamp my tits to prove it. (No face though)
From now on. I will sign all posts
-Jen
Funny how guys keep pretending they are me
>>700379123
>>700379144
>>700379045
>>700378830
I still feel like thanking you guys. Holy shit, haven't laughed like this for a while
>>700375081
Not to be racist, but statistically....
>>700379340
Totally. Like why do men keep thinking they are me?
-Jen
>>700378743
>>Getting this buttfrustrated that i didn't post post "properly"
Are you 5? you should venture outside your basement sometimes neckbeard-kun.
>>700378889
I used to CL troll back in the days too sending them to my neighbors house and shit. The shitstorm that ensued when his wife would answer the door would be hilarious.
>>700379340
>>700379123
>>700379144
kek...You guys are great.
>>700370256
>Just, adapt yourself to what humanity has become
Oh it’s just now getting like that
>>700377863
lmao look at how many idiots think it was their ex
hahahahaha dumb bitches thinking someone will care about them.
all people are just self centered narcissists and nobody gives any real fucks about anything, especially not another person
>>700379305
depends on your definition of "best"
also, if humanity doesn't get it's shit together and takes evolution in its own hands anytime soon the brain won't be a match for computers anymore soon.
>>700379500
AM I EVEN MYSELF ANYMORE /B/ WHAT THE HELL
>>700379484
From a girls perspective that's a little cruel, but it's hilarious.
-Jen
>>700362324
>>my coffee gets pulled toward her due to gravitation
>>700379604
Well if girls would time stamp with tits then we would know who was who.
-Jen
>>700379604
Idk anon but good luck with life
>>700379743
-Jen
Every 30s new Jen is Jenerated on this thread, this is fantastic ..., I also am Jan..., The Jan
>>700379743
>>700379789
>>700379713
Thanks! I hope your day goes well aswell!
>>700376932
wait you ran out of monies on a 5 minute train trip across sweden??
>>700370951
>this is when his long lost love kill herself in her apartment
