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How can I subtly fuck with my roommates?

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How can I subtly fuck with my roommates?
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>>698378421
Move all the furniture a little. Like a few inches from where they had been placed originally.
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>>698378491
They wouldn't give a shit about that
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>>698378491
Not everyone is as autistic as /b/tards
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Get a large hand pump type hand sanitizer and leave it somewhere obvious. Motherfuckers love clean hands. When it's about halfway done, empty it out and refill it with lube.

Or add Nair to body wash and rubbing alcohol to shampoo.
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>>698378421
Change the light settings on the tv to vivid for a few days. Once they get adjusted to it, switch it back to cinematic.
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>>698378734
This right here. Lube in hand sanitizer bottle.
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>>698378734
How about he mixes nair and shampoo together
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>>698378734
Two of them are females, I'd be murdered kek
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Make the kitchen table wobbly. Keep making it wobbly the exact same way so they wonder why it keeps getting fucked up
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>>698378421
very quietly insert your dick into them
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>>698378421
>roofie them
>fuck them subtly while asleep
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>>698379509
Fucking winner imo
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Shoot him when he enters the front door
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>>698378421
When I woke up this morning I noticed that someone had stolen everything in our apartment and replaced it with an exact duplicate,

I ran to tell my room-mate.

When he came to his bedroom door, I said "Room-mate, someone has stolen everything in our apartment and replaced it with a exact duplicate!"

He looked at me and said "Do I know you?"
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>>698379702
didnt you read "subtle"??? idiot????
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>>698379997
Then USE A SILENCER.
My god, man, do I have to think of everything?!
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>>698379840
Maybe it's cause you called your roommate roommate
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>>698378421
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QWuSWwIS7c8
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>>698379997
If you do it quick enough he won't notice...
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>>698378421
Start hiding pennies in weird places
Don't make it to obvious at first but gradually start making it more ridiculous.
My roommate finally lost it when he woke up with a penny stuck to his leg.
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Put a dead animal in the air duct in thier room. Should just be 4 simple screws to remove.
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>>698378421
>tryna
FUKKEN TRIGGERED
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>>698378421
Poop on the lid of the toilet
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>>698378421
Print out pictures of frightening things, cut them out like you used to in grade school art projects, and tape them to shit like the inside of cabinet doors so that when they open it they just have Jim Carrey as The Riddler staring out at them.

Alternatively, mess with their food by putting little green food coloring droplets on them every now and then so it looks like it's rotting way too quickly. Then, as they're about to throw it out, say "woah, that's still good, what?" and eat it yourself.

Or, find out where they keep their dildos/vibrators and jizz on the tips of them every time they're out. Just coat the motherfuckers, but in an unoticeable way. Then eventually you'll get them pregnant. kek-worthy.
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Some sand in bed?
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>>698381245
Are you the joker?
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>>698378421
Jump scare them
Always park in the good parking spot
Hide all the forks or spoons
If they have a certain thing they always do change it slightly i.e. move their keys slightly but still in view
Turn off the electric breaker to their room every night before bed so they have no light in the morning
Unplug the wifi when you know they are watching Netflix or gaming
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>>698381437
I bet you ask that on account of how good my pranks are, so I am grateful. You know, I could be the Joker. I've always identified with his struggle. He just has too many funny things bouncing around his head so it drives him mad, you know? Kinda like me. You don't want to see me when things get too funny. No one would last a day in my head. Except maybe my best friend Lawrence. Not because he understands me or anything, we're basically just the same exact person so that's why.
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>>698381245
A better option to actually get them pregnant would be to jizz in their lube
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>>698381784
>pic related
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>>698381877
In an unoticeable way. That part's very important.
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>>698378421
Step 1: Get about 45 dead animals
Step 2: Cut heads off animals
Step 3: Place animal heads everywhere, Showers, food boxes, cabinets, beds etc.
Step 4: Wait
Step 5: Profit
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>>698381245
> Get them pregnant in an unnoticeable way
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>>698382069
Yeah that's Lawrence, my best friend.
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>>698378421
Use one of their shirts as a sploog rag. Put it back in their drawer.
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Use their bathroom and don't flush

Do it all the time

Slowly fuck with them
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>>698382100
Subtle
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>>698378796
Underrated
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>>698382364
Yes it's very important it's in an unnoticeable way, or else they'll notice and think it was you.
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Unpair all of their socks. Put most of the left socks somewhere they will probably never find it, like uder the dresser.
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>>698378491
This is Joker level shit.

I would put the milk on the bottom shelf.
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>>698380526
Fucking kek
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>>698378421
Put a single pube in their milk/soda/whatever bottle. Do it every time they buy a new one and leave it unfinished in the fridge.
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>>698378796
Not a bad idea c
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Put unecessary stuff if the refrigerator to crowd their things out. Start very subtle and reasonable, like your bread. Then hot sauce, then peanutbutter. Go for gold and put some canned food in there.
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>>698381245

Keep in mind if the sperm dries out (e.g. you don't live in a real nice warm and damp place), it dies/becomes ineffective for impregnation.

It's REALLY hard to actually do this in any successful way. Biology just doesn't go your way.
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put a boiled egg in the vent
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>>698380128
this
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Take the caps off of all of their pens.
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>>698382708
whats a left sock?
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Start getting in their way all the time. When they go to open the fridge, rush out between them and the fridge door and open it yourself. When they're trying to leave the house, block the door by vacuuming, etc. Eventually they will hate you but they won't know why
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Go to their computer keyboard. Pop a few keys off and transpose them. If you wanted to make it obvious spell urgay. On the keyboard. If subtle, exchange the comma and period keys.
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Hide the doors, pull all of them out of their hinges and stow them away
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>>698383635
Fucking kek
I think he meant if they have designs not just like plain black/white/whatever
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>>698383635
It's the one marked left. Duh.
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>>698383831
this, or delete system32
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>>698378895
subtly rape them
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>>698383831
Or turn around the numberpad, instead of
123
456
789

789
456
123
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>>698378421
I used to work at pizza hut and i would do that all the time
>>
shove their toothbrush up your ass
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>>698384089
How about glue on their toothbrush
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>>698383111
My father used to keep regular peanut butter in the fridge. How the fuck am I supposed to spread that shit as a kid.
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>>698381346
This is a very good idea
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Powdered charcoal in the showerhead
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>>698379546
kek'd
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>>698384174
Maybe he was a secret /b/ tarf trolling you hard your whole childhood.
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>>698381877
Do this.
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If i had female roommates i would jizz in their yoghurt everyday
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>>698384036
Ah yes, or maybe just the middle keys, making them 654
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If you have on demand, get the comcast remote app on your phone
whenever you all are watching tv, do litte things
>Turn down the volume with the app
>change the channel
>turn up the volume
They will start to get pissed about it, theyll blame the others but the whole time do not tell them you have the app
Then one day, go into the app and select the search bar on your tv
>type into the bar, "theyre coming"
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>>698378421

I hope you get your ass beat for being a pussy ass roommate.
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Snag their phone, see if you can get the front facing camera to work. Take a picture of Putin from the web. Wait....profit?
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>>698378617
>>698378688

they would care if you did it every day for a week
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trim a tiny bit off of their toothbrush, let it get shorter every 2 days or so
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Max strength unflavored Orajel in their toothbrush
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>>698378421
get a bunch of mice and put them in his room
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Beef or chicken bullion cubes in the showerhead.
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>>698383831
Fuckin evil genius right here
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This thread is the exact reason I prefer to live alone
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>>698381053
that wouldn't be a horrible idea if you did it in somebody else's house
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>>698383951
i bet ur mum buys you them
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Take off their shower head. Put half a cube of chicken bullion in it.

Empty the salt. Mix it so 1/4 of it is sugar.
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>>698378421
Subtle:

Start taking things of a quantity. For example, chips, or if they buy something like strawberries. It has to be a slow drain.

Now here is the twist. When they finally start noticing, buy the same product they have, and then start adding some back everyday. S, that their bag of chips lasts twice as long.

Then just stop.

It's subtle and will make them question their perceptions.

Yes, I am evil.
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>>698378421
Put a cow in the living room. Usually takes a crane to get it out.
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>>698384950
Someone did a prank at work where the swapped the pound sign fir the star symbol. I've left it that way because I still think it's funny.
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>>698381538
>Always park in the good parking spot
that's just evil...
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>>698378421
Dirty protest in kitchen
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>>698385066

u did it wrong :(
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>>698383951
but... that image is wrong... why would anyone do this???
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>>698383831
unless you're retarded, most people don't even look at the keyboard.

muscle memory, dude. if someone did this to me, I would never notice.
>>
Buy a potted plant as a house gift for all to enjoy. Every week go get a new one that is a few inches smaller and swap it. Do the same with a fish bowl and a gold fish.

Swap olive oil for sunflower oil.

Get some hot chillies and remove and dry seeds. Add to pepper grinder.

Take aforementioned seeds and grind to powder and put in shower head.

Swap all coffee for decaf for a week. Then swap back with some espresso blend for one day. Rinse and repeat.
>>
Take a printscreen of their desktop as it is. Then put all icons in one folder and set the prints screen as the wallpaper.
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>>698385572
Dont forget to hide the taskbar
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>>698384447
no one would room with you, because you're a vile creature
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>>698384783
I like this idea
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>>698378734
did the lube at work. Manager was so pissed. ended up moving it to his desk so he could troll people with it
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>>698385515
It works for keys not used much. Most people don't have them all memorized. You could swap printsreen umber lock or scroll lock too.

If they don't notice for a long time could be part of the subtle part too. Imagine taking a year to notice gay wad is spelled out on your keyboard.
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Set all their internet shortcuts to shutdown their computers.
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>>698385805

Whats so bad about lube on your hands?
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>>698385866
basically the only ones I have to look for are ins/del home/end shit

otherwise, if I can't find the right keys, my keyboards shifted to the left or something and everything is fucked up
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Oh dont forget to select all items in the recycle bin to "restore". Keep them busy working out what needs to go back in.
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Go into their Microsoft word. Go into autocorrect and find replace. Make it so every time they type the right type of "there" it auto changes it to "their." Make it auto correct correct spellings to slightly mispelled words such as I before e words.
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>>698386094
instead of alcohol, you're getting oil... it stays there until you wash it off or takes like 10+ minutes to dry. also it's just not the thing you're looking for.

and I'm pretty sure the dude was making a masturbation joke.
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>>698382878
Take it easy, Clarence Thomas.
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>>698378421

Yeah he wont notice
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>>698385031
This
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>>698385866
How would you know that it took a year to notice if you never saw it? Wouldn't you just think somebody just did it?
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>>698378421
Put a spooky skeleton in the kitchen and videotape reaction
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Dust their underpants with Cayenne Pepper
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>>698386454
That one would probably be too obvious. You could just replace one or two keys or space them one apart as well.
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>>698386454
depending on your living situation, maybe.

would be funny if someone finally noticed a year or two down the line and already lives with new roommates. would be likely to blame one of them.
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>>698378421
cut holes in all their pockets.
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Tell them that you are gay and that you have a crush on one of them, that should cause some major confusion.
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>>698378421
Replace everything with generic versions. Like drink their soda and refill it with the off brand. Eat their food and replace it with the store brand, just a lil glue to reseal packages.

Go buy under clothes that are a size or two smaller than what they wear. If you got a dirty roommate with skid marks n shit then do it with other clothes, normally underwear and socks are funniest.

Wear a mask while watching movies playing video games when you know they'll see you. Esp scary masks for horror movies. Sit in your room quietly wearing the mask like you're meditating. Walk into the living room while they're watching movies/games and just stand there quietly for a moment while wearing the mask. Once they address you just look at them for a moment and walk away.

Start arranging all your products that have faces/people/mascots on them in groups. Like Tony the Tiger goes on the shelf beside Mr Clean. When ever it's moved, move it back, then explain to them that some of these people don't get along so you're making sure everyone is happy.

Leave a roll of duct tape laying around with a ball gag. A make shift ball gag works too like a strap thru a tennis ball.

shit, trying to remember all the other ones I use to do.
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>>698386883
Or jealousy, perhaps
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>>698387052
>and you wonder why everyone thinks you're crazy
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>>698386496
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Chrome has a Web extension that replaces all Web images with an image of Nicolas cage. Install it on their computer if they use chrome.
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>>698387386
This. Soo this.
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>>698387386
OP should just order like 30 pizzas to their house and act all oblivious when they show up

memes
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>>698387386
Hahaha like the extension with bananas for 4chan on threads containing YLYL on OP's post. That was brilliant too, I see people complaining every now and then.
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>>698387052
You're weird dude
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Put a wireless mouse hookup to the back side USB port if they have a tower. Wait till they are working on something, then give the mouse a little wiggle occasionally.
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>>698384447
How you gonna open her yogplay and jizz in it man? Anything outside vanilla and youre obvious, plus their individual packages so you can't tamper with them in this exact manner idiot.
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>>698387293
Nope, I know why everyone thinks I am crazy. When I was 18 I lived in a duplex with 4 my friends. Normally everyone always had friends over staying the night. Drugs, alchohol, and lots of parties. Everyone use to fuck with each other. One was running late for work and his brother waited till he was done taking a shower to dump flour over the top of the shower curtain. But that was a long while ago, I still do odd shit for fun.

Example, be me going on business trip with few people from Office. We're walking around the court yard waiting for next session to start. I start saying talking to the animals. Hello Sir, How are you Today? I don't wait around for an answer, just keep walking. When ever they start gossiping about people at the office I change the conversation to big foot. One of the secretaries caught on thinks its funny.
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>>698387995
This is pretty good. Lighthearted and hilarious.
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>>698385330
Sorry :(
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>>698378421
put a jolly rancher in his shower head
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>>698378421
Replace the toilet paper with a Roll of Sand Paper

Put an Insert coin notice from an Arcade machine on the cistern

Melt Dark Chocolate with mix in nuts let cool for a bit take some olive oil make it shit shapped put in a bucked and leave in bathroom and don't own up to anything

Replace Tooth paste with Condensed Milk Paste

Mix some flour and salt in a cup with some water to resemble Jizz leave it in lounge room daily
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When their toothpaste is almost empty, squeeze 1/4 more into it from another tube so it never runs out. They will come up with an irrational idea that the brand is so good it just lasts forever.
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>>698379702
>its just a prank bro
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>>698378421
usually chloroform works.
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>>698388171
>When I was 18 I lived in a duplex with 4 my friends.

I almost had a heart attack and thought you were my crazy roommate from way back when... except he probably wouldn't have called some of us friends.

and your shit is lighthearted. my roommate was legit borderline and had a few episodes.
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>>698387986
Hey, I got woken up at 3 am once by a friend so fucked up on drugs he thought someone was on the roof putting trash in the vent above the kitchen stove. I tried to go outside and he'd grab me by the shirt and pull me back in. Had friends so drunk they couldn't find the bathroom so they pissed in the litter box which was adjacent to the bathroom. Found friends sleeping in our vehicles because they were so fucked up they decide to come over in the middle of the night, couldn't get an answer at the door, couldn't make it home so they just crawled into the car through an open window or laid down in the back of the pickup truck.

I was only a pothead. Didn't touch the harder stuf like lsd, acid, or cocaine like they did. Didn't drunk as much as they did. Just mostly pot. I was basically the soberest one around.

I learned to get my revenge on these guys thru fucking with them.
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>>698388171
so this is how retarded people entertain themselves?
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>>698388171
What in the fuck? Are you fucking autistic? You are one weird motherfucker
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>>698388257
Hehe tnx, sometimes I wonder how much I've been subtle pranked in my life and didn't notice.
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>>698388508
and after the 3rd refill do it with mayo
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>>698380128
Its called a suppressor, bro.
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>>698388461
who the fuck has a cistern?
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>>698388597
you did your weird things sober. those idiots were out of their minds
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When you're about to head out to class say dick hair fast. If they ask what you said, say take care.
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>>698385062
Imagine getting caught putting more chips in your roommate's bag.
How the fuck do you explain that.
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>>698388709
Hah yeah then they will be like "man that Colgate gets rough right at the end."
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>>698388608
>>698388616
Sit through 3 days of 10 hour bullshit conferences that are mostly meet n greets, power point presentations, and just general shit we could have done through a conference call or a video chat. You get really fucking bored.
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>>698378491
Works real well in jail.
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>>698388597
What I'm saying is the stuff that you do is just strange. Like the mask shit, arranging products into groups, and duct tape shit. It's all just weird and I don't see how this is fucking with people. They probably didn't get upset they probably just talked about how weird you were. I think you actually have some sort of mental disorder man.
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>>698389126
nigga that shit is bolted to the floor
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>>698388955
Yep I know. I was the youngest one. But the most reliable/responsible. They also picked on me a little bit so it was all fair game to fuck with them.
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Go into his computer in the drive a few levels deep. Create a folder called goat porn. For bonus points put a few pictures of goats like this.
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>>698388722
You hear that? It's the sound of nobody caring.
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>>698384089
nice idea. not only messes with the roommates.... it also feel damn good.
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>>698389255
I'm sorry what do you believe "fucking with people" is? Putting snap pops under their insoles is also fucking with someone but thats just a regular prank. Fucking with people is different than just pranking them.
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>>698389255
Oh, and the ball gag duct tape was left on a friends front seat so when everyone got in his car they were like wtf and he was all "I don't know ... that's not mine.".
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Put a dead body in the shower head.
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my ex roommate never closed his browser, so I set his homepage to goatse. 2 months later when he re-opened his browser for whatever reason, the trap was set. Best part was that such a long time passed, that even I had forgotten.
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>>698378421
Make it so their cd tray will constantly open and close randomly
http://www.howtogeek.com/forum/topic/cd-tray-continuously-popping
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Suck his dick while he's asleep.
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>>698389713
Whatever you say dude..
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>>698378421
kys in the tub
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>>698380736
Will try/10
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>>698389548
It's also fun to make a folder called "Late Night Rambles" or "Drunken Thoughts" and fill it with odd notepad documents. Copy a bunch of shit off the internet and save it.
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Post the face you make when you find a new fetish on 4chan
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Take his keys. Move it to the next piece if furniture over. If on the desk, put it on a side table.
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>>698389893
what's a cd tray?
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>>698390007
Haha nice one.
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>>698390071
I'm retarded, I meant to make a new thread.Not reply to this. Im half awake
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>>698390144
Kids these days
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>>698388985
This made me laugh pretty hard.

Uhhhhhhh
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>>698384878
Underrated
>>
>>698389911
Alright. Here's one for you and tell me your opinion. We have gourds that grow wildly all over the place and our house was beside a couple acres of unused land. Get off work early, no one is home, collect a bunch of gourds and proceed to draw faces on them with markers. Make a few of them resemble roomates/friends. Take off to the mall and don't return until they are all off work. Come home and act just as baffled as them at wtf is going on.
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Buy light bulbs of all different watts. One day have on 120 watts. Next day switch to low watts like 25. Then gradually thru the week switch between high medium and low. Then at end of week murder them. Also get some hard back books and put one under their mattress every few nights. First day they may not notice one book. Add a book every 3 days. After a few weeks they'll go insane.
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>>698385521
That last one is fucked up.

I like it.
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If they use an alarm clock or standard wall clock change it by 5 minutes plus or minus the real time ever few days.
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>>698385062
Underrated post. I love the idea of fucking with someone while helping them. Super simple thing would constantlly fill their shampoo super cheap idea and never stop doing it. Long con fuckyea
>>
if they use Apple stuff then go to accessibility and change the assisted hearing so one of their ear buds/head phones will be slightly louder
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>>698388985
Been there, not with chips though, it was mashed potatoes. Just owned up I was drunk, ate a bunch of mash, and was replacing what I ate. The key is to act like what YOU are doing is Normal and their reaction is Abnormal.
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>>698379702
This XD they'll never suspect
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>>698390396
Ha that's good. I use to slip those religious flyers you get on the door between my friends porn mags.
>>
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You can make fake jizz by mixing milk, with vaseline. Keep it in a small squeeze bottle that fits in your pocket. Now you can quickly, & easily leave a few drops of jizz in random locations like keyboards & mirrors.
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>>698380736
This is really good, gonna do this
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>>698390503
I literally wouldn't notice unless the bottle was clear. I would use the same shampoo for years and never wonder about it.
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>>698390368
Idk man you have a strange way of messing with people.
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>wedge a potato or baseball in their cars tailpipe

>if you're on the same network open cmd and type 'shutdown/ir' and shutdown their computers from yours

>hide all the toilet paper

>put sugar in the shower head (NOT kool aid using sugar will make them feel sticky afterward and go in for another shower and this goes on until the sugar in the head is gone)

>pepper extract in toothpaste?

>cut out all the centers of the Oreo's and fill it with wasabi
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>>698387052
Love the mask idea, where the fuck do I buy masks from
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>>698390567
>act like what YOU are doing is Normal and their reaction is Abnormal.

this is key to getting away with a lot of stuff

than and blackmail.
>>
Wait until he buys a new book. Slip a small flier in it like it's always been there for some rediculous advertisement.
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>>698390823
You don't find it funny for people to come home and find gourds with faces drawn on them that weren't there when everyone left. Obviously someone got in the house. Nothing stolen, nothing broken, nothing smoked/drank. Just gourds sitting around the front room on all the couches and chairs.
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>>698382069
Wow that's badass
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>>698378491
>>698378796
>>698381346
>>698383831
>>698388508
i hope that you use vpn guys or you are fucked up
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>>698390777
trips confirm good idea
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>>698378734
>Get a large hand pump type hand sanitizer and leave it somewhere obvious. Motherfuckers love clean hands. When it's about halfway done, empty it out and refill it with lube.
This
>>
>>698382483
holy shit true friendship. R u a bronie
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>>698390823
I think you're just a killjoy boring cunt
>>
>>698391033
No I don't. Now quit trying to get me to agree with you to make yourself feel better. Just face it, you're a weird ass autistic /b/tard with an even weirder sense of humor. You probably watch anime or MLP or something. Leave me alone.
>>
>>698386415
had a shameful kek
>>
>>698383111
Check
>>
Email them fucked up things. Here's my roommates:
[email protected]
>>
>>698391156
Fucking this.
>>
>>698391074
How's that going to matter?
>>
>>698387052
>Leave a roll of duct tape laying around with a ball gag. A make shift ball gag works too like a strap thru a tennis ball.
That's right up there with the old donuts/donut holes/superglue trick.
>>
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>>698388608
>>698388616
No this is how you find cool people like this dudes secretary.
>>
>>698390929
A lot of bigger cities have party stores that carry costumes 24/7. Hobby stores have supplies for DIY masks.

If not then wait till around Halloween and go to the dollar stores or walmart and buy cheap ass masks. Shit always gets marked down after Halloween too. Like a $10 mask is only $2 week after Halloween.
>>
Post their pictures on 4chan, for dudes to bait to.
>>
>>698378421
Put lye in the handsoap
>>
>>698378421
ask them if you can make a party and if they say yes invite like homeless people and drug addicts and act as if they were your friends
>>
>>698391465
>>698390929
>using the internet
>doesn't just google masks
>doesn't realize you can buy anything you want via the internet
>>
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>>698389318
Not all jails. some just have metal bunks. So you move the psyco cat killers bunk closer to the meth head bunk every day, the result is very entertaining. Dont get me wrong, shit should be nailed to the floor I've seen inmates break metal bed posts off and threaten people.
>>
>>698390712
God is watching you fap
>>
>>698383111
>like your bread. Then hot sauce, then peanutbutter
I normally do this anyway
Unsweetened peanut butter should be refrigerated and refrigerating bread makes it last longer
Depends on the hot sauce though
>>
>>698380515
kek i remember this
>>
>>698383521
Underrated
>>
Set every clock differently, only by minutes though. One can be 2 minutes slow and the other could be 3 minutes fast.
>>
Take their fresh cloths. Rub the collar all over your dick. Fold it back up. Now they have a subtle dick smell wherever they go. Bonus points. Every now and then say......"do you smell that?"
>>
>>698385515
>not knowing that displacing keys changes what is typed
>>
>>698378421
1. Go to chinatown/chinese shop
2. Buy "prawn paste"
3. ???
4. Profit
>>
>>698391074
kek
>>
just leave them quiet at night - like move to another city, change you identity, delete your facebook - they will invest some time in looking for you but will not give a shit eventually so i think it is subtle
>>
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>>698383831
Install pr0n on his/her system32
>>
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>>698391232
I don't care if you agree with me or not. It was just interesting to hear someone in a "fuck with people" thread say a common prank is "weird". You're the first. So it's even more humorous to see you call me names.

Btw, not autistic. I've been tested. ;)
>>
>>698392055
are you claiming that if you switch the L and K keys, the computer will automatically know you did this, and therefore type K when you meant to type L? are you retarded?
>>
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>>698392146
Oh boy, I have some bad news for you
>>
>>698391643
Yes, but depending the mask you want you can't try one on off the internet. Yeah if you want something like a Jason Hockey mask or V for Vendetta, a hard plastic with strap, generic mask sure. But the rubber masks you need to try on and make sure it fits right/looks good when you're wearing it.
>>
>>698392195
If their phone is unlocked switch his mom and girlfriends contact info so he sends it to the opposite person.
>>
>>698391975
If your dick always has a noticeable smell you are a disgusting pile of shit and should kys.
>>
>>698379702
>>698379997
Noscope headshot from behind bushes.
>>
>>698392426
he said subtle, not noticeable.

do you even english?
>>
>>698379702
>>698379997
>>698380128
my fuckin sides
>>
>>698382069
ohohohoho,ehehehehe,ahahahaha!!!
>>
>>698383150
>>>698391074
It's hard enough to get someone pregnant by cumming inside of them
>>
>>698392680
Subtle is still noticeable, it's just not obvious.
>>
>>698384977
same here
>>
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>>698392146
wew lad. Look at my results
>>
>>698392929
nothin to see here. just shitposting. move along
>>
>>698393031
yes, it's easy to get a high score when you know what answers they're looking for
>>
>>698380128
kek
>>
Have sex with them?
>>
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>>698392885
dafuq nigga
>>
>>698386328
Kek
>>
>>698393031
Yeah, I got a high risk too
apparently introversion=autism now
>>
>>698393053
Wash your dick, you fucking animal.
>>
>>698393031
Congrats! You can now apply for medical marijuana!
>>
>>698391546

>>Make a party

You don't have any friends, do you?
>>
>>698393368
I don't need to wash it. I scrubbed it clean on your collar.
>>
Switch forks and spoons xd
>>
>>698393031
Fuck the queen
>>
>>698393746
Replace both with sporks.
>>
Jizz on their crotch while the yare sleeping
>>
make a paw print of any small critter and leave muddy footprints all in their shower, like some wild animal keeps getting in there
>>
>>698393637
affirmative
>>
>>698378734
>motherfuckers love clean hands
didn´t know that.
>>
>>698392055
This isn't true you fucknut
>>
>>698389580

Nah, that's the surpressor working ffs.
>>
>>698392146
Yes you do care. I think you're a weird asshole fucking stinky fag ass.

You actually had to be tested for autism? Lol yeah there is definitely SOMETHING wrong with you if you had a test done to see if you have autism.
>>
>>698384695
Noice
>>
>>698394013
Have a goddamn Snickers you fucking savage
>>
>>698378796
This is some super villain shit
>>
>>698383150
>you don't live in a real nice warm and damp place

you don't know me
>>
>>698389924
Kek
>>
Go into his closet. Spray a subtle shitty cologne or perfume on his cloths.
>>
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>>698394013
Well. Let's address these attempts, shall we?
>weird
Welcome to 4chan, you're on /b/, we're all a little weird around here. You're a self-hater.
>asshole
See weird
>stinky
You can smell people through the internet? Holy shit that's like some mutant powers kinda shit. You should join the X-Men!
>fag
Yeah, fag's have a better sex life than straight people. So essentially you're saying I get laid. Which one of the most important things on the internet is getting laid. So THANKS for giving me props on that one. But being called homosexual really isn't much of an insult.
>ass
You already called me an asshole, that's like calling me a jerky jerk.
>actually tested for autism
Obvious you don't know the image and the site. Welcome to 4chan new friend. Lurker more. Mmkay?
>>
>>698382069
>>698381245
has this switched to a cringe thread?
>>
>>698390396
I leveled my roomates bed with washers. every morning after he went to work I would put a washer under the left legs of the bed. went on for about a month, so around 1.5 inches
>>
>>698390567
>>698390963
Holy fuck I'd like to see the situation where a guy is just re-filling his roommates stash of mashed potatoes, getting caught and play it off casually.
>>
>>698394013
Hey! Hey there lil feller!
>>
>>698394598
Wash their pillow with a lot of starch then put it back in the pillow case.
>>
>>698393031
Wew lad
>>
>>698384174
microwave you dumb shit. maybe he wanted to keep it fresh, barely enough money for peanut butter after buying you clothes and school supplies you miserable little shit.
>>
>>698394817
Also, put corn stach in their underwear
>>
>>698394450
>Ive been on 4chan way longer than you haha you lose
Lol get a life. Also no, not everybody is the same here. Go back to your fluffy thread loser
>>
>>698386268
that's just cruel!
>>
>>698394702
Roomate always had a large bowl of mashed taters. Not the flake kind from the box either. He wouldn't share them with anyone. Every time he made them he'd divide it up into two bowls and the big bowl was off limits. So everyone use to sneak some except his brother who would purposely eat the shit to piss him off. They got in a fight in the kitchen once that resulted in taters being flung all over the place. A group of guys living together in a confined place tends to produce some strange territorial situations. Not just guys either people in general. I've watched ladies get in an argument and made over a parking spot and which chair they sit in at the break room. People are odd as fuck.
>>
>>698392297
Have you ever bought anything online? like shoes?
>>
>>698385062
>>698390503

you guys are fucking stupid, next thing you know you'll be gassing up the roommates car "for the lulz" get better ideas faggots
>>
>>698394450
I've never got why some seem to be proud of their 4chan browsing. Like how they call people new as if it makes them superior. You would never brag about that in real life
>>
>>698395486
>>
Cheese/mayo just under the vent in their rooms.
>>
>>698394106
>2016
>calling tripsdbubs
>>
>>698385165
>pound

It's called hashtag you dumb nigger
>>
>>698395961
Bait.
>>
>>698395961
It's called pound you underage fag
>>
cut/widdle away about an eighth of an inch off each of their lefts shoes. small enough to not notice but big enough to give them a permanent limp in a few weeks. Hilarious to watch them try on new shoes and still walk funny.

glue a mug to anything you don't use anymore but can't sell. Chances are they'll break the item and you can make them pay for it.

slowly put male or female (target dependent) hormones in their stuff over a period of months and watch as she begins to wonder why her voice is getting deeper and she can't get rid of the unibrow, also start to refer to her as 'kronk' for the more mental side og this plan.
>>
>>698395961
reported for being underage
>>
>>698395613
Buy things online? Yes, lots of items.
Buy things I wear from online? Nope, I try shit on.
>>
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>>698395753
>mfw it's not working like he thinks it is
>>
Every time they rent a video tape, record over a section in the middle with the most disgusting porn you can find. When they return the tapes, they won't know what is going on until the store connects the tapes to one common renter and they get in trouble. Takes a crane to get out of that ne!
>>
>>698395753
>not bragging about 4ch in real life
what are you retarded or something?
>>
>>698390823
his ideas were harmless, ridiculous and had comedic value.

Granted - a pretty dry and sometimes dark comedic value, but I can totally get on board with what he's saying. If I was on the receiving end of this shit and realised I was being messed with, I'd find it fucking hilarious.
>>
>>698396074
These newfags. I swear lol. That guy will probably ask you why fleet wood mac did a cover of the smashing pumpkins song landslide.
>>
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>>698396391
>rent a vhs tape
>>
>>698393031

>wew lad
wew lad
>>
>>698396164
>widdle

heh heh heh heh heh heh...
>>
>>698381053
Don't do this. It takes a crane to get it out.
>>
>>698396391
>rent a video tape.
Lol, do people still do this?
>>
>>698395961

you didn't think it would be that easy, did you?
>>
>>698396596
underage faggot detected
>>
Got $156 dollars? This books for you.

https://www.amazon.com/Pranksters-Ultimate-Handbook-Illustrated-Fiendishly/dp/0965635619
>>
Insert magnetic strips in the fridge door. Put on more strips each day so the door becomes harder and harder to open. After a few weeks, remove them all.
>>
>>698396810
No, 34. But all video rental places here went out of business 5 to 20 years ago.
>>
>>698396993
dude you rule
>>
>>698395051
Are you a fucking retard?
>>
>>698381346
Yeah that sounds good. I've got a really good sand guy too
>>
Fap, clean your cum away, but leave some but not very much. Dip your cock into any of your roommates drinks
>>
>>698391666
cool pics satan
>>
>>698379840
Way to completely butcher a Steven Wright joke idiot.
>>
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>>
Put a crane in their bed. It takes a crane to get it out.
>>
>>698378796
You are a God damned monster
>>
leave one ball hanging out your zipper
always gets 'em.
>>
>>698383951
That fucking pic is backwards wtf. That's not cool bro
>>
>>698397419
in-between middle and top kek
>>
>>698381538
>Unplug that wifi
Found the faggot underage
>>
>>698397276
Kek
>>
>>698391441
>Be secretary
>see autistic faggot talking to himself
>nervous laugh, I really hope he won't stab me...
Yeah, no...
>>
>>698384038
Well you're fucking retarded because pizza hut sells full pizzas and you can't do that to a full pizza only slices unless it's a pizza hut express but you said pizza hut so you're retarded either way
>>
>>698397419
I've done this with those lil mini figures for gaming. Local comic shop was closing and everything was being sold off. So I bought a whole box of little figurines for $5. Would randomly leave them places. Roommate caught on so every time I'd go out I'd leave one somewhere in public. I'm sure a lot of times people mistook them for a lil kid leaving a toy behind.
>>
Change their keyboard settings to Dvorak
>>
>>698396214
You can still google where to buy them in person you fucking retard...
Were you hoping people to give you directions to the nearest "mask store"?
Jesus fucking christ, kids these days are fucking helpless.
>>
>>698394450
Holy shit you must be some autistic newfag man
>>
>>698398054
>google
Fucking google normie REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

>What is Bing?
>>
>>698396391
>Every time they rent a video tape
...have you been asleep these last 15 years?
>>
>>698397819
Actually it gets more amusing when it's addressed and you ask if they speak to their pets. Everyone does. So what I can't be polite to strangers?

You really need to look up the definition of autistic.
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