Let's make ourselves cry Feels thread
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Let's make ourselves cry
Feels thread
>>698337927
>poster
>1
>>698339430
I get feels when people ignore my threads
>>698339701
HOW DO I STOP FEELING WHAT I FEEL NOW? HOW DO I MAKE IT STOP? PLEASE HOW DO I MAKE IT STOP. I'M SO ANGRY I SO HATE MYSELF I'M SO FUCKING LONELY I SO LOVE HER.
Having some drinks and feeling empty.
Bump
>>698340446
I'm feeling the same.
We'll get through this shit eventually, but for now I take solace in knowing that there is someone just like me in this thread. I'm glad we can share this pain together /b/rother.
>>698339763
>Things I miss from my childhood that won't ever come back!
You mean like my father?
I don't know why I pulled up my laptop wanting to post in one of these. I've already gone through the major depressive part. The close calls. The drunken phone calls to the hotline. The therapy. The SSRIs. The "partial hospitalization", but lord knows that didn't last long.
Took up lifting weights, finally; it's about time my vastly below average strength and body had something done about it. After finding all the typical treatments didn't really work for me, I eventually just kind of decided "fuck it, I'll just keep living." I also decided to try to have a vague journal kept up of what I do every day.
It's basically looking like
>Workout, nothing
>Nothing
>Workout, nothing,
>Run, nothing
and occasionally hang out with a friend. I'm missing something but god fucking dammit it's driving me crazy not knowing what it is. No, not even crazy--maybe just more apathetic and tired. I want to program more to catch up on all the fucking shit I should have learned the past 4 years of college. Not that I blame my formal education in the slightest--it's absolutely all my fault on that front.
I want to tear my skin off
>>698341320
No friends? Humans or social animals. You need some people in your life, in real life face to face. And you need to find some kind of purpose.
>>698341564
>or
*are
>>698340994
Why did I had to even meet her, why?
>>698341564
Got friends. Hung out with one yesterday, got vague plans with more for next week to go to the beach. Most other ones are out of state for summer school, didn't come back home for the break. Didn't make too many college friends back where I go to school (I'm home atm) that I'd hang out with that happen to live around me. Not that I didn't go out and socialize or whatever but
I dunno
I dunno even the seeing people thing just kind of just feels like I'm gliding on by.
>>698341749
I fucking feel you, anon. i only feel emptiness. happiness is temporary, and all emotions i feel are replaced by sadness and emptiness
one of my good friends has been missing for a day or two, they don't know where he is but they found his phone by a river, if anyone lives in the Philadelphia area keep an eye out please
>>698342335
his name is sean boylan
>>698342335
>>698342396
Sorry about that anon, I hope he turns up soon
>>698341981
I don't want to feel anything. I want to feel how I feel when I sleep. I get so fucking angry when I see her and her new bf. I have no one to talk to, I'm rotting more and more everyday.
Ive been crying already for almost 24 hours now... massive headache and eyes almost closed cause of swelling. But i'll dump what i have since this thread's up and nobody's posting anything really feelsy.
>>698341221
or mine anon :D
guess what?
I just miss her
>>698343069
>>698342554
we are in the same boat. I had been flirting with her the entire semester of school, had a crush on her since grade 9. when I finally got the balls to ask her on a date she got drunk the night before and never showed up. a week later with no communication from her she posted a picture of her and a new bf on instagram. the day before the date is the last time ive recognized any happiness in my life, and what made it all worse was that she said she loved me.
>>698343165
I got to thinking about this image. I find it strangely comforting. The Japanese in the corner says "tsuzuku", or roughly in this context "it will continue", something that in some anime you'll see in the corner of the screen that lets you know that the story goes on next episode.
Why is this comforting? Sad Pepe sitting alone in the rain is, of course, sadness incarnate. But that text in the corner reminds us that Pepe's story doesn't end here, in despair. Pepe is sad now but the story goes on.
So it is for us. When we're feeling sad, for whatever reason, it is comforting to know that the vast majority of the time, the world will go on. We will go on. This isn't the end, no sadness need last forever. Unless we give up, our lives go on.
>>698337927
I am afraid of what I eat.
I was overweight and started dieting to lose it, I'm at a healthy weight now but I'm afraid of eating too much or the wrong things and getting fat again.
I weight myself three or four times a day, and bass my meals off of that.
My sister nearly died of anorexia and I'm afraid I'm going down the same path.
I'm equal parts scared of being fat, and scared of it getting to the point where I have to be hospitalized because I don't eat.
>>698342921
>>698342921
>>698342335
it doesn't make sense, he seemed so happy, he had a good girlfriend, great football player, and was doing well in school
>>698343406
>>698343532
>>698343651
>>698343693
>>698343761
>>698343843
>>698343177
We'll keep on rowing then. I love her, I told her that. She loved me too or so she said. I can't seem to find another girl I can love and I'm trying. Now I still love her while she posts pictures with her bf saying how much she loves him.... on instagram. I feel you /b/ro, but I think it will make things better if I'd had someone to talk to about this so here you are. I wish I had friends that actually care.
>>698343983
>>698344063
>>698343937
all i wanted was her, /b/ro. i just wanted her. but apparently it was too much to ask.
>>698344152
Anyone still here? Should i continue?
>>698344234
I'm lurking, please continue
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0zMjD6EQp4L
One of my favorite poems, and appropriate for this sort of thread...
Nothing lasts forever.
Not even depression, as this anon so eloquently said >>698343363
>>698344234
>>698344301
>>698344336
Thanks /b/ros... feel less lonely atm
>>698344421
>>698344234
I'm lurking anon, you're doing a great work.
>>698344189
We'll forget them someday, maybe in a few years you'll remember this thread. I know I will. I hope things will be fine anon, good luck.
>>698344189
It will fade if you have the strength to not fixate on the loss. The sympathy of every sad fucker on 4chan supports you, for whatever that's worth.
>>698344421
I'm here too bro
I really wish a day went by I didn't regret something. A day I didn't speak without thinking and confirm to everyone within earshot that I'm a fucking idiot.
rough day. high. sorry
>>698344506
My boyfriend came home from work yesterday... and told me to stop cleaning and told me to sit on the bed and smoke one ...that we gotta talk... his face was serious and his kept looking away...
>>698340446
Sleep, lots and lots of sleep. Or drugs lots and lots of drugs.
>>698344760
And then he took my hand and stayed silent for a few minutes... then he told me " we need to take a break..." ... i froze... i started shaking and choked back tears... i looked down and asked him " why?... "
>>698344910
"Because things are not going the right way... we need a break, we need to figure out if we really love each other... i need to think about what i am and what i should be and what i should do with my life." ... I felt like bugs were crawling all over me... I wanted to scream and cry and get on my knees and beg him not to go. But i couldn't. If i did that i would make a huge mistake. He would either stay and be miserable and later we'd end it in a horrible way. Or he'd break up with me, which is understandable.
http://vocaroo.com/i/s1UEyqN6qn0P
Here's some more eery/dark poetry.
Gives me an excuse to practice reading shit.
>>698340446
feeling the same, worst fucking thing is, she cheated on me and i'm in a relationship with a wonderful girl that I love and will marry, but I just c an't stop thinking about her, it's so hardcore
>>698345218
And so i played along. i told him it's okay. I want him to figure himself out as well, if we're gonna continue our relationship he needs to be sure of what he wants, and if he's really in love with me , and so on. And then we took a last shower together, had the last meal together, and then i helped him carry all his things to his place. And then i broke down... and wept, and wept. I'm sitting here all alone, with barely any family and no friends, nobody really giving a shit about me. While he's surrounded by caring family and tons of friends and probably doesn't shed a tear over this because there's caring people all around him to distract him from the shit.
I always lurk in these threads, never post, but I think it's about time I contribute
>>698345549
>>698344760
>>698344910
>>698345218
Plz stop this hurts me in my soul.
Because I did beg, and I got what I wanted.
He told me that he wished me never married me, that all those times and the decisions in his adult life he was trying to get rid of me but didn't have the heart to do it.
He says he loves me but I don't believe it for a fucking second anymore. But I'm a fool and I still love him, so I endure the pain.
>>698344360
>>698344483
I don't know who you are
I don't know what you want
If it's my feels you're after
I can tell you I don't have much of a soul left
But what I do have is a very particular place in whats left of my soul. A place your posts are tapping into.
If you stop now, that'll be the end of it, I will not praise you, I will not hate you.
But if you don't, I will get hit in the feels, I will praise you, and I will hate you.
>>698345577
>>698343481
fucking eat what you want. If you get fat and don't want to be fat then work out and burn it off. Don't be a lazy piece of shit who makes themselves puke to lose weight.
>>698345612
>>698345764
>>698345544
>>698345602
And so i sit here, waiting for the ultimatum, if he loves me or not, if he's gonna come back to me or not. I'm crying and feeling like it's better to just shoot myself. I sit here, and get to stare at the empty spots where his things were. The desk with no dust spots where his computer was. The empty side of the closet. The half empty shoe spot. Half bathroom empty. A part of me is missing right now. And this is only the 2nd day. And i'm tearing apart inside. And there's nothing and nobody i can go too right now. For even a little bit of comfort. There is nothing right now... that can fill that huge hole inside my chest. Temporarily at least. He's gone, and i DON'T KNOW if he's EVER gonna come back.
>>698345732
I don't make myself puke to lose weight, but I did diet really hard to lose almost 40lbs. Still eating enough in calories, but I have a lot of heat intolerance and working out is fucking miserable, I end up feeling like a piece of glowing charcoal.
I can't break myself of the eating habits I forced, I don't know how to maintain.
>>698343651
Holy shit, this is almost word for word what I think when I'm depressed. What even is life...
Broken souls,
Are drawn to me.
Broken's all,
we'll ever be.
Spend our lives,
Among the whole.
Why must they,
Hate broken souls?
Maybe soon,
My soul will grow.
When broken,
It never shows.
Far too gone
I'm just a hole.
All that's left;
A broken soul.
Not alone,
But still denied.
A kinship,
To feel inside.
Life must take,
It's solemn toll.
Life delights,
In broken souls.
I remember a thread that was probably sometime in the winter or spring where an anon said that he's glad that his post will get lost in the wind. His post will be gone and he won't be remembered. This is for you. People will remember. Your voice is heard. Hopefully you're still living.
>>698345929
Would you do that to somebody you loved?
I think he already knew the answer, he was just too cowardly to tell you.
Nothing anybody can say will make it easier.
You sound like a decent person, so I hope you survive this.
>>698345929
There's no reason for me to be alive right now. I quit my job recently because they were abusing me for shit pay. My mom is the only one around me, and she's had it with life as well...she went to alcohol. My dad and brother live elsewhere and give absolutely no shits about me. All my friends left me one by one. I am poor, friendless, with close to no family, nothing valuable besides this laptop. There is really nothing for me in this world. Now all the future plans i had with my boyfriend are going to shit slowly, that makes half my life fall apart. Before i met him i always told myself i'll be okay. Happier times will come. They did, and they've also destroyed everything behind them before leaving. In 3 weeks it's our 1 year anniversary. I imagine he's either gonna come back then, or break up with me then.
>>698345929
He doesnt love you.
If he come back that's because it didn't work with Stacy
And my trump card. Plus one more which is too big to be uploaded
http://9gag.com/gag/a5dj2bo/but-you-didn-t
>>698346470
>>698345945
Do you have any hobbies? If you just eat like a normal human being you shouldn't gain any weight if you're active enough. Maybe focusing on a hobby can distract you from your eating disorder. Just look at what you're doing and ask yourself "Is it even worth getting worked up about what food I eat?" I think if you step back and look at the actual problem you're facing, you'd see that you have the strength to just eat like a normal person and not care what kind of food you eat like the rest of us.
>>698344234
Please sir
>>698346439
>>698346470
Don't get me wrong i don't want to make him look like the bad guy. There's been circumstances and it's a long story. But on short, before we met he was also in hell. He smoked weed all day and drunk and cared about nothing. After we met he changed in 1 second and went from shitman to guy madly in love. He gave up all that to be with me , got a job too , became a better person overall. So i'm pretty sure his brain is somehow stuck inbetween. we had no accomodation time we just met and bam. I know this break is what he needs. Or else we would have no good future together. But that doesn't stop it from hurting. That doesn't mean he wont discover he doesnt really love me, he just needed a hook to get out of the shit he was in before. This might just all be in my head, but there's a probability to everything, and you can never know what's inside another human's head. I feel like an abandoned pokemon.
I hate it how she made me care again
Made me feel like I could do something
But the only thing keeping us together was nothing more than a broken chain
And most of all, I hate myself for not letting her know
>>698346510
fck
>>698346995
>>698346785
I know i love him. There's been other nice guys before him who tried me and gave up when i said no.. they just dissappeared after. I just didn't have any feelings for them and it wouldve been selfish to say yes just so i dont feel lonely anymore. .... i know it /b/ ... this is the love of my life. This is the man i'm supposed to spend the rest of my life with. But in reality, not every time the other person feels the same. And the fact that its gonna take a while for him to figure that out , too long a while for my heart. What am i suppose to do now?
>>698346785
>I feel like an abandoned pokemon
>she's playing Pokemon GO
>i'm playing pokemon GONE
I know I probably don't belong in this thread but and I will try to explain this best I can. Sorry in advanced. The idea of love and being in love with someone is great imo the feeling that you two are inseparable no matter what happens. Sadly I have never felt that way and wish I have, "hook ups" start to get boring, idk I suppose I'm just lonely and hope someone will come around sooner than later.
>>698347057
>>698347055
I said pokemon unconsciously because i was browsing my feels folder and passed by this.
>>698347051
>>698346664
Not really. I'm kinda sad all the time so I just day drink and watch the same scary movies over and over again.
I tried to get into ice skating but I have asthma and it made it act up.
I don't mind eating on a diet long term, I just don't know how far I can go before I start to gain weight again.
I love pasta, I used to eat pasta on a daily basis. I had no self control with this shit, and I know if I slack I'll fall back into acting like a fat fuck.
>>698347208
>>698341320
Get a raspberry pi, get sensor modules, code your ass off with everything you can do that has immediate, tangible results.
>>698347264
>>698343177
She's a child. Fuck her (in a figurative way).
>>698347055
Please, please don't think that he is all that's out there. I am the married anon who posted earlier.
You say you almost had your one year anniversary, so you are still in the stage where your passion is dazzling. He seems like there's all that you need in the world.
For your sake and his, let him go. He wants his freedom so let him have it, I learned too late that there is more to life than love, especially fickle love.
Move on with your life. Find things to do independently, do ANYTHING but don't be ready to grovel at his feet.
>>698347199
Friend found out I liked a girl. He told her something and she started avoiding me. Am I fucked?
About two years ago, I was given the option to either go out to the sticks, where life was cheaper and quieter, and I could get a job in my major, or to stay out here near a major city, where I was born, where there was always something to do.
I picked the latter without even thinking twice.
I have no real achievement to show for it--I have an entry-level job at mimimum wage, and I live in a small rented room in the outskirts of town. The part that doesn't get a red cent on the best of days.
It took me the better part of a year to get this far; I've already burned bridges with the guy I was crashing with before then. The only thing I've made any real progress on out here is a foray into the arts I know better than to try and bank on.
And it took me this long to realize that living here was a waste of my time. I've spent the last year and maybe a half chasing bright, shiny distractions and vain, unfounded hopes instead of focusing on what mattered. My life isn't the least bit stable--should anything go wrong, I have an all-too-brief window of time to fix it. Any longer and what I pass off for a life is gonna come crashing down. And I know there's no way in hell I can fix that and still live out here, which, again, begs the question of why I even bothered.
TL;DR: My life is a fucking joke, and I have nobody but myself to blame.
>>698347665
Yes.
>>698347209
You gotta get a hobby... Do you have a job? I personally just sit on my computer and play games all day but it's still something to do while interacting with people. If you're not addicted to alcohol yet you should probably save up your money for something you really want. Something that you wanted as a child but couldn't get because you didn't have the money. Now that you're an adult, you can experiment with different interests and hobbies out there. I know this sounds stupid, but if you're afraid it's going to turn into something worse, you might want to get a counselor or something to help you with your eating habits.
>>698347209
Create a schedule. Go over what you'll eat for every meal for the day. Count the calories of each. There's no question of whether you're going over or under your alotted calories when you have it planned out. Also, don't be afraid to deviate every once in a while if need be cause fuck it.
>>698347591
We're on a break, he says we're not broken up (at least yet) ... I know, i did let him go. I understood what he needs and what i need to do. I act all cool and strong in front of him, i tell him it's okay to take his time and figure everything out, give his life a meaning then think if he wants me in the final picture he got there. But you know, that doesnt mean it doesnt hurt. I just locked myself in the room and im crying my eyes out. I'll sacrifice these pieces of my heart and give him the space he needs, if that's what it takes to give him reason to stay. But the whole process hurts like a bitch. He's not all there is out there, but he's all i need and want. There will never be anyone out there close to how he is and if we break up, he'll stay on my mind and heart for the rest of my life. I can't even accept the fact i'll be living a sad life with a guy i won't fully love and meanwhile i'll be thinking of him. JUST LIKE MY MOM.
>>698347939
I do have a job, I work full time. I'm only happy at work, and that's just half the time. I have friends but none of them know my actual issues.
Already on the alcoholic train, so can't really escape that... All I wanted as a kid was pets anyways, and I can't handle more responsibility than a cat.
I like drawing, I like doing things alone. Exploring places, but I can't do it at night here because of methheads. Not too find of doing things during the day.
I guess a counselor won't be a bad idea if It gets bad enough though, I just wouldn't know where to start.
stop it
>>698348014
I don't count my calories on a device or anything anymore, I just mentally track what I've eaten. It's effective, but I will keep losing weight if I stick too strictly to it.
I don't know the right macros for maintaining.
>>698348096
I know exactly how much it hurts. I know the numbing terror of the person you love doubting whether they want to be with you, and I know the relief of them deciding to stay with you.
But that kind of love is not a happy ending. It burns bright and seems like all you need but it isn't.
Do not sacrifice yourself for anybody, YOU come first. Not him or anybody else, it is not selfish, you need to make yourself a priority instead of an afterthought while placing him first.
the past few days I've been waking up unable to breathe and my hearts currently pumping strangely if anything is to happen to me I love you guys
>>698348312
If you get fat, you can just lose it again, ya?
>>698348595
Yeah but i got nothing left... Knowing i have nothing right now is even more painful. If i wasnt so poor i'd get on with this so easy. Id just go away for a few days. Maybe camp in the forest or do something for myself. But i can't. I can't even afford a pack of cigarettes and a beer. I don't even have a license. And i feel like it'd be too miserable to ask anyone else for help. Maybe i could get my dad to take me away, but i dont want people going all banans on me.
>>698348845
I guess so. It only took four or five months to lose 40lbs, and I've got a lifetime.
Thank you anon, that kind of puts things in perspective
>>698348738
Stay strong for me anon. This place won't be the same without you.
>>698348981
>>698348898
No, you don't have him. You are so involved in him that you think there's nothing left, but there is an entire world, and an entire lifetime.
Do anything you possibly can for yourself. Go with friends, build the strength to tell him you don't need him, that you will not be so dependent on him that you can't find your own happiness.
It hurts, and it will hurt for a long time, but you can grow past this.
>>698344483
Ella, this is a beautiful story
>>698342823
God I remember feeling like that as a kid. That first week of summer vacation or winter break was always so welcome. Now I'm 30 years old, and I feel like every minute I have is being squandered by things I don't care enough about.
>>698346109
Did you write this anon?
>>698349085
I tried making friends... They all leave after a little while...ever since i was a child it's been this way. I'm probably not good enough, or fun enough for other people... maybe its because i grew up poor and never had the money to enjoy cards and dolls and going outs with them. I don't have the willpower anymore to do anything... i stuck through it all but this is the last drop... This is the last drop in the cup man... i can't do this. I hanged on and tried my best but i dont think i can get up after this...
>>698349228
Yes I did.
>>698349387
I don't want this thread to end ;_;
>>698349387
Do you work? I find a lot of solace in my coworkers. Granted my husband is still around, but is deployed for seven months at a time so I was forced to spend time with myself. I was forced to see and accept the bad in him, even though I love him dearly.
If you can't find friends enjoy your time yourself. Walk places, explore, take solace I your one alone.
It is not the last drop the in the cup, the cup is infinite.
You took a blow to the knees but you will heal, you will grow stronger, you are so much stronger than you believe you are.
>>698349545
I said before, i quit work this week because they were all abusing assholes, and the pay was too shit to take it. How can i enjoy time by myself when i'm broke? I would love to do something for myself, but all i can do is shower and be on the internet. The fridge is empty so i cant even cook.
>>698348924
Listen, I really want you to try to stop drinking before it turns into something much worse. I've seen people turn into alcoholics and it's the most horrible thing ever. I wish for you the best in seeking a counselor and getting your eating disorder figured out. Before this thread gets 404'd I just want to say that you seem like a really great person. I would recommend doing more things with your friends and family if possible. Anything more than watching the same scary movies over and over.
I'm so tired I just want to sleep and not think about her but ofc I can't sleep
>>698342936
Okay hold up, this is fucking retarded.
>A few million years late.
Do you even star nigger?
>>698349738
Sorry, I'm a bit drunk so I have a hard time remembering earlier posts.
I find a lot of joy in walking to parks, are you in an area with a waterfront within a few miles? Or any parks? If so just go there and walk.
Walk until you're exhausted, then walk home and go to sleep. At least you'll have done something other than wallow.
If you have any money go buy some eggs or something cheap like that, maybe some veggies and combine shit, see what you can make.
I like to make soups, because carrots and celery and spinach are pretty cheap, as is chicken stock.
my girlfriends currently in Canada visiting her parents while she's been gone I picked up my old eating habits and I'm overweight now, she's flying back at the end of the week
>>698349975
I have nothing. just a few coins thrown around the room. Can buy a bread with that. We do have a park 20 mins away by bus, but most of my face is swollen and i dont want to go out like that. I don't want anyone to see me like this. pathetic.
>be me
>be alone
>find a gal in highschool who loved me
>one day ask her out
>she says yes
>imthehappiestmanalive.jpeg
>FF 4 years
>we're happy and planning the future
>one day she stops talking as much
>leaves my messages on seen
>get a random text
>"hey, i think we need a break"
>think "okay, she's mad at me. 3 days and she'll be back. Then ill tell her the good news"
> 3 days pass
> "i think we need to break up anon"
> devastated but keep thinking "its a phase"
> this was one week before my birthday
>tfw i was going to propose
>tfw she already has a boyfriend
>tfw i wanted death again for the first time in 4 years
Pic related - ring i was gonna propose with till i got a better job
>>698349814
I think I may be too far gone for that man. I go through two bottles of vodka a week or so depending on how much I socialize. It's the only thing that relaxes me anymore.
I'd like to go to a counselor but I don't want to be institutionalized. I saw what my sister went through and I can't handle that level of personal invasion.
I and trying to do more with friends, but my family lives a couple thousand miles away.
Doesn't help that my best friend has been away for a week, so I've been really fucking lonely. And he got a girlfriend so I doubt he'll have time for me anymore.
>>698350174
Rustle my jimmies more anon. I feel for you. Im so sorry that happened to you
>>698350122
Are you a lady? I am, and I know puffy crying face is ugly, but take a few shots of liquor if you have it and get out of the damn house.
If the nearest park is an hour then walk an hour.
Fuck what anyone thinks about the way you look. If someone asks either tell them to fuck off, or pour your heart out and get advice from someone who's empathetic enough to notice.
>>698349461
I'll keep this anon, thank you
Im so fucking tired of having dreams that are based around me having a girl that loves me. Tired of waking up and realizing that it was all in my head. I dont want dreams anymore. Better yet, I dont ever want to wake up
>>698350383
Yeah i am... I have no liquor, man if i had id be drunk as shit now then id go to sleep.
I don't know... it's scary... I live in a scary neighbourhood and if people see you weak you might get shit on. Some people even get killed here if they hang around alone and they're weak. Some days its better some days its not. Should i take this risk?
>>698350174
Im the fucker on the right.
And she.. she was my queen
Now she is my destroyer
it might be sad, it might not be sad. I wrote this on a shitty trip and it means a lot to me. goodnight, /b/
>>698350560
The other day I dreamt that I was making love to a kind girl, she was tender, cuddled me, telling me she was in love with me.
>>698350645
I hear that, I alcohol to sleep nearly every night now.
If you are miserable and don't give a fuck what could it hurt? I live in sketch part of town but still walk places, I have nice conversations with methheads sometimes as well.
They're all just people, don't be scared of them anon.
why am i still crying about girls i was too beta to make a move with
>>698337927
>be me at work
>just off my shift talking to AP guy
>AP chick manager comes up and tells me to leave because I'm trespassed
>wtfm8iworkhere
>tells me I'm fired
>go to her cozy office and she says I'm fired for conspiring to steal with old AP guy
>old AP guy shows up and confirms I haven't seen him in months
>she apologizes for accusing me of such crimes
>end dream
I dream about this old AP guy constantly. He was so good, such a cool guy and I miss him so fucking much.
I've seen him twice in the three months since he was fired, and I just want him to be around again.
I have such a hard time coping with even people I don't like leaving, but he was such a big part of my work world...
>>698350867
Not methheads... gipsies, pawn-brokers(if thats what you call them?) , whole clans all around.They will pick on anyone weak and alone because they got a whole army to back them up and the police doesnt get involved ever. It's like the european version of american ghettos, but instead of guns they got knives and swords and numbers. I dont wanna die yet ;_; i wanna know decision first
>>698351167
Ah,I haven't been to Europe so I don't know what that's like. Only risk here is drug addicts.
I have to say I'm sure he's already made up his mind darling. If not now then for a later date, if he doubts things after only a year it will not end happily.
Find your own happiness love.
My life really went really down hill after I hit 23. My mother died, I suddenly inherited all her responsibilities. I had literally no time to grieve. I learned their finances were totally screwed up and they were actually close to losing the family home over lapsed property taxes. I had to sort that out, which was a long winded ordeal with lawyers and courts. I had to raise my kid sister who was just starting middle school. I loved her to pieces so this was probably the only joy I had in my life, though it was hardly always easy dealing with a girl who is was starting puberty. I had to manage a severely disabled father who was probably more dead than alive. It took almost a full year before I was finally able to slow down a bit from all the stress and process the fact that the mother I loved so much was gone. It incapacitated me for a week.
Ended up getting addicted to oxycontin in an effort to be able to show a smile in front of everyone. Had a really shaky relationship for a couple of years in there... It wasn't worth it in the best of times. I was desperate to have some kind of connection outside of my little sister who was 12 years my junior.
A good number of years have passed... My little sister is already engaged and out of the house, and I'm here alone. Honestly, when she finally left, I cried my eyes out since she was the last bastion of love I felt from anyone close by. It's not like she's gone but she's not just down the hallway blasting music or watching anime or something she ended up picking up from me.
Literally 6 days ago, I quit the oxycontin, 9 years after starting it. It was excruciating, and I still feel pretty crappy, but the worst has passed...but I'm going to try to take back my life... God knows if I have it in me anymore after all the stress I've accumulated these past many years, but my little sister is safely in the hands of someone I feel I can trust to keep her protected, so whatever happens will just be what happens.
>tfw have a awesome gf
But i've felt heartache before. Took me many months to deal with it but it's funny, the one day she really hurt me, I was set free... You can learn and grow from pain.
>>698351422
Thank you for everything! This thread is probably gonna die out soon... I appreciate you being here and listening , and i hope you get the happiness you deserve so you won't have to drink yourself to sleep anymore. Be safe <3
>>698351604
How old are you sad anon girl? How old is your bf?
>>698351604
You are welcome, I hope you take the advice to heart. I've seen the darkness of pursuing someone who doesn't truly want you, and I wouldn't wish it on anyone.
Thank you for the well wishes, whenever nightmares stop I'll stop. Have a good night love <3
>>698351767
Night, beautiful <3
>>698351735
I'm 21, he's 22.
>>698351840
Did you have any bf before him?
>>698352290
Course i did. This is the first time it went for so long, because the ones before were all jackasses. Been through plenty heartbreak and this relationship was soooo good. I felt from day 1 that he's the one, before we even got to know each other properly. I didn't feel this with the others, not even half of this.
>>698342335
he prolly dun shat himself in de hed
>>698352454
Tell me whats so different about him? Why him? (cause I know what it's like)
i feel bad for this thing's face
>>698351840
haha i hate you and everyone hates you. dont let anyone tell you differently, you fucking idiot nigger
>>698350221
Well best of luck to you. A mosquito just flew into my freshly poured lemonade so that fucking sucks. Hopefully you find meaning to your life though and pull through healthy mentally and physically.
>>698348738
You're memory will not be in vain, anon
>>698352608
Because he loves me for me. Unlike the others he never asked me to dress up in a certain way or wear makeup or give up makeup(kinky stuff doesnt count) or comment that im not shaven today or that i look like shit or make me do things i didn't want to do. Just being together was enough, even if i was poor, fucked up family and background, emotionally unstable. He just wanted to be with me no matter what and defended me from everything and everyone. There are plenty other reasons but i'm not feeling so good and i think thread is about to die.
>>698352854
>you're
>>698352933
He sounds like me. Hope he sorts his shit out. But just be ready because it could go south... if someone wants a break they want an out. You can go on from this if that happens. I know it may feel as that you can't but you can. It'll take time sad anon.
>>698353197
faggot
NO BALLS HARD CHALLENGE LISTEN TO THIS SONG UNTIL THE END!!!!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0HDM3eYp4KQ
>>698352933
If I lived in Europe I'd definitely chill with you and walk around that not so good neighborhood and get some stuff off our chest
>>698353197
We still message on facebook and he talks like nothing happened... like usual. Is that a good sign?
>>698353449
That would be great. But usually people who want to hang out with me are not from here..
>>698353511
If he's doing that it's probably a sign of him letting you know he's gotten over the relationship and wants to talk like you used to as friends
>>698353511
Give him time. I know it's hard and you want an answer but don't push him. Just talk back as you would.
>be me
>in germany on school trip
>wandering city by myself because I have nothing better to do
>come across a gestapo prison that is now a museum
>hm this looks interesting
>they give guided tours of the cell block, and I don't remember what the tour guide is talking about because I am reading all the information placards on the wall
>carved on the wall by a prisoner many years ago is: wenn keiner an dich denkt, denine Mutter denkt an dich
>when no one is thinking about you, your mother is thinking about you
>mom would always hang out with me and play with me after school
>mom was always smiling and encouraging towards me, even when I wasn't being my best person
>mom would try and make my birthdays enjoyable even though I didn't have any friends
>mom never made fun of the way I dressed, looked, acted, or what I took interest in
>mom was the only family member who helped me pay for things I wanted, expensive things, like extracirricular events in school
>mom was the only family member who came to my high school graduation
>mom was the only person who visited me in the hospital
>I cried when I read those words
>>698353690
We were never friends. He talks to me like we used to talk before the " break" ... Like its all cool and were still cool and we're just apart for a few hours so we gotta talk on facebook chat...
>>698353774
I'm not pushing... im giving him space... but im only human... it still hurts and i feel like insides are tearing up.
>>698353818
Holy shit this just hit me and reminded me of all the times I made my mom cry she was just trying her best
>>698353991
have a fap
>>698353991
wtf is that gay image
I'm too depressed to go on
the only words of advice I have are to not live in regret, to not become as cynical as I am.
It can get better, but only if you let it
>>698354358
Running out of resources here, posted more than half the pics in this thread so far. So much my folder can handle.
>>698354304
That's just gonna remind me of the sex and his amazing body. Inevitable i'm gonna see those images in my brain and make me more depressed.
I still don't know what to do my girlfriends flying back home at the end of the week and I've gained like 30 pounds how fucked am I?
How do I deal with this
My ex, whom I gave my all too, has come back. It's been like 2 years but she wants to give us another try, or at least start working towards it. I'm so worried this is just some bizarre way of using my feelings towards her, and that I'll end up hurt again. It's been messing with my sleep, I think about her so much, it's been so long
>>698354555
Run every morning and evening. Dont eat anymore crap, just healthy food. Exercise a bit at home if you want. Thats all you can do, and if she doesnt like you even after youve done your best to please her then shes not worth the time.
I cry every morning when I wake up.Because this is the only good Pokemon Porn I could find.
>>698354720
Thanks for the advice anon I'm gonna start tomorrow
>>698354660
>It's been like 2 years but she wants to give us another try, or at least start working towards it. I'm so worried this is just some bizarre way of using my feelings towards her, and that I'll end up hurt again. It's been messing with my sleep, I think about her so much, it's been so long
Say no and block her number. She's probably trying to use you as a comfy rebound guybecause it didn't work with Chad and she will leave once again later.
>>698354660
how did you two break up?
how die you feel then
not to sound like a dick, but people aren't likely to change a great deal
Y'all got it easy.My friend died.He was flying home with some skittles and Iced Tea and he Dindu Nuffin!
>>698354785
Good luck buddy. And be confident with yourself, people gain weight and lose weight and its not such a big deal as long as you don't become a disgusting landwhale or a spooky closet skeleton
I feel so empty right now. This sucks.
>>698354480
How did you two meet?
In the words of Shia Labeouf...
>>698354660
It's been two years? If she really was interested in working it out, she wouldn't have waited two years. Gotta let this one go.
I hate summer. It just reminds me that I'm not with her anymore.
>>698354834
>Chad
Her last boyfriend was less attractive than me, and more of a loser.
>>698354872
There were a lot of reasons, I'm only 19 so this was during highschool. I made a shit mistake and had a bad involvement with a friend from a class and she found out (She lives a state over). We had a really good relationship, and the way she makes me feel is pretty unique and different from the other girls I've been with. She feels like a friend, who knows a lot about me, and I know a lot about her, y'know? Most of my other relationships have been fairly vapid, honestly. I always feel really immature saying that kinda stuff, but it's true.
>>698355034
ty anon
>>698355087
>Her last boyfriend was less attractive than me, and more of a loser.
My 2 years gf left me. I'm ugly and a loser.
A-re you him?
JUST DO IT!...JUST...DO IT.DON'T LET YOUR DREAMS BE MEMES.DO IT!
>>698355154
Nah they werent together long, I don't think.
Did you cheat on her with a girl significantly less attractive then her?
>>698348738
>>698348929
>>698352854
going to sleep goodnight /b/ros, godspeed
>>698355337
I'll take that into consideration, thanks for the tip
I love this one
>>698338242
>>698355337
Stfu and gtfo here cunt, we don't need you here.
>>698355645
I can almost see your pathetic overweight banana glowing in the dark, lit by your banana screen which is the only source of banana in your room, giggling like a banana as you once again type your little banana thread up and fill in the banana. Or maybe you don’t even fill in the banana. Maybe you’re such a disgusting BANANA that you actually paid for a 4chan banana, so you just choose the banana. Oh, and we all know the banana. The “epic” banana guy, isn’t it? I imagine you little banana laughing so hard as you click it that you drop your bananas on the floor, but it’s ok, your banana will clean it up in the morning. Oh, that’s right. Did I fail to mention? You live with your banana. You are a fat fucking banana, she’s probably so sick of you already. So sick of having to do everything for you all goddamn day, every day, for a grown banana who spends all his time on b4n4n4chan posting about a fucking banana. Just imagine this. She had you, and then she thought you were gonna be a banana or a banana or somethi
ng grand, and then you became a BANANA. A pathetic Bananafag BANANA. She probably cries herself to sleep everyday thinking about how bad it is and how she wishes she could just disappear. She can’t even try to talk with you because all you say is “I REALLY REALLY LIKE THIS BANANA.” You’ve become a banana of your own self. And that’s all you are. A sad little banana, laughing in the dark by himself as he prepares to indulge in the same old banana that he’s done a million times now. And that’s all you’ll ever be.
>be me
>break up with gf some months ago
>get back drunk to her, cuz im a spineless pussy
>have sex
>feel better afterwards
>go out this weekend, get drunk again
>have sex with another woman
>imagine my ex face while fucking her
>next morning she says im not over ex, she can tell from the way i talk about her
>mfw
>now im laying here on my bed, dont know what to feel
>>698355087res
>only 19
the world has alot to offer anon, and at 19 theres definitely a chance to find some better for you, someone that will love you; but only if you're ready to love them
trust, I've lived through some torrential shit, even if you get back with an ex, if the relationship didn't work in the past due to it being sullied, it will never be the never same
there's trust issues that both of you will never get other, you won't feel comfortable just leaving her alone.
it's sad but unless you're blessed by Saint Valentine himself, it's true; you just have to find someone new, and really commit yourself to them, and really hope they do the same.
The world is rough Anon, the only thing holding us back is how afraid we are to be rough with the world
Been lurking, these posts and stories give me confidence that everything will be alright. Goodnight /b/.
How does one unpuff the puffy eyes after long crying?
>>698347899
Why not go to the sticks now? Even if it's harder.
Never be afraid to start over. I've done it, several times. It's hard at first.
I learned many years ago, everything I go through is just for a short time.
Physical pain, emotional pain, financial pain, etc. The sun will rise again, I'll put my nose to the grindstone and work harder but I will surmount this obstacle.
Get a second job for a while, save money like crazy, live on sweet potatoes and water and go to the sticks. Live in your car at first if you have to.
TAKE CONTROL even if that means sweeping away everything in your life.
Just never family, unless they're toxic. Toxic people MUST be dropped from your life at all costs.
You can do this anon.
>>698344652
Same boat, man. I always feel like I'm two seconds behind on catching what falls out of my mouth.
>>698356232
Hot shower.
>>698356009
goodnight, Anon
Goodnight /b/ros
keep fighting the good fight
>>698355782
any advice how to get outta this?
>>698356438
Really? someone else told me ice on eyelids helps...
>>698350560
I had a dream where i was with a girl and she was holding my shoulder and i was holding her hip and we just got done playing lasertag (i went to the city and loved it and played like 5 times) but i was in highschool and i look.at her face its a petite mexican girl whos smiling brown eyes and natural flower scented hair and im not caring what anyone says while were walking im actually happy.. and then i realize im in the dream because theres no way theres lasertag in the bathroom and she dissapers and im by myself
>>698356562
Try both.
>>698348096
He's not on board with that. If it's progressed this far, he wants someone else and is too pussy to say it.
Find something to do to take your mind off him and for God's sake CUT ALL TIES WITH HIM.
Do not answer any communications, disassociate from common friends (at least til you're in a better place emotionally), don't frequent places he goes.
You are better than a runner up. You are better than his standby in case the new girl sours.
Time does heal almost all wounds.
KYS
>>698356232
Ice cubes, rub em all over your closed lids. It'll make you tear up from the cold, but it's decreasing swelling faster than anything it can cause. You can also wash your hands, moisturize the tips, and gently press massage around the puffiness.
I remember seeing a beautiful girl freshman year I never talked to her I planned to talk to her next year I never saw her again after freshman year I still have dreams about me and her together
Lol,RIP
>>698350760
>>698350760
Dude, you aren't a bad looking brother. Hit the gym and have a shave - you'll be swimming in pussy.
The hurt will leave
>>698346998
>>698347410
This hits me hard.
If I could go back in time, the only thing i would change is telling her i loved her. I told myself if I ever felt anything for anyone, I wouldn't pussy out, but sure enough when the time came I naturally acted like my faggot self.
I still remember she looked slightly disappointed and that was the last time i ever saw her. Literally the only time she didn't smile was the last time I saw her and practically said goodbye forever.
You crawl in bed with him
I lay alone.
His arms wrap around you
Holding you close
I lay alone.
He says that he loves you
You look back into his eyes
And say you love him too
I lay alone.
You married
Had kids
Made a family
And come home from work each day to a beautiful house
Asleep safely together under your blankets
And still
After all this time
I lay alone.
>>698337927
goodnight this time for real
