ITT:we pick a minor superpower that we want something dumb like being able to summon pencils
i can decide at any moment if i want a foreskin or not
>>697173063
Omnipotence
th power to shit magma
To be able change the taste of my cum
I always know where I parked my car
>>697173063
to seduce any species of animal
>>697173063
clog / unclog other people's arteries at will
>>697173389
so like black people or something
>>697173408
thats a bit major thats like saying i can decide if someone dies or you mean like you can't kill them just cause them pain
>>697173565
latter
>>697173063
To transform into that raging meat machine of a roo in the pic and just bouce around the outback raping unsuspecting citizens and demanding protection money from local shop owners.
>tldr; i could turn black whenever
>>697173063
Being able to do really satisfying shits that completely empty your bowells
Know people's felling rubbing their ears
The power to convince other people I'm famous, but only if there's no way to take advantage of that fame with the person.
>>697173063
You do realize your power could be used to seduce a lot of hot jewish chicks?
To be able to transfer an image in my head into paper perfectly, and be able to edit it from there.
>>697173063
The power to instantly untangle my headphones when I click my fingers
ability to shift single atoms of anything for 10 seconds with 30 minuite breaks
>>697174177
dubs make em true
>>697173063
The power to eat anything without making/spilling any crumbs
>>697173957
You'd never be bored
The power to make people shiver
Obviously you need the ability to appear slightly to the left/right of where you actually are
The ability to conjure a yoyo whenever I want
the ability to accurately tell the time without looking at a clock.
>>697174177
you mean like changing its atmoic stucture
>>697173063
Can change our eyes one shade lighter or darker.
>>697173063
Reality-warping
The power of having a clean ass after shiting and not needing to wipe.
>>697173063
to be able to bring the dead back to life but only within 12 hours after they die.
th ability to tell when someone reads a text i send them
>>697174986
Thats insanely strong.
>>697174986
Not a major power at all...
the power to use/manipulate electronics with my mind
such as typing without having to use a keyboard
clicking and so on without a mouse. maybe even see whats going on without a screen
happiness
Be able to give people an orgasm by shooting them with finger guns
>>697175252
>implying this is minor
>mfw
>>697175419
this would be incredibly funny and awesome.
>>697173063
Vacuum mouth.
>>697175688
please explain
>>697175769
Well like the power to just suck food away from your friends. Like if your sharing a bag of popcorn and you eat all of the popcorn.
>>697175419
That would be so OP
>>697175769
S U C C
U
C
C
The ability to change the temperature of a room by + or - 1 degree Celsius
>>697175914
Damn
I'm surrounded by naked, horny chicks, but only when I sleep
>>697174880
That would be great for camping.
>>697175419
/bestinthread/
the power to have free wifi anywhere
Control any of my body hair however I want (change length, colour, etc)
>>697175419
this
To be able to silence animals. Yapping dogs begone.
>>697173063
the power to make the room i'm in room temperature
Power to always have the exact amount of money when buying fastfood
The ability to lift anything, but only when its in a thunderstorm.
>>697173063
the ability to make all my farts make girls want me
>>697173063
The ability to make womens hair fall out.
"oh you wont fuck me? Shazam!"
The ability to knock myself out at will
The ability to be immortal but you have to die.
>>697173303
They got pills for that. Ex suddenly got really into blowjobs when i switched from strawberries to chocolate flavor.
Short of that eat pomegranates or pineapples or at the very least their juices. Celery makes it that nice pornstar white color.
Ability to know exactly what time it is at any given point during a day
The ability to always win at Rock Paper Scissors
>>697176899
>minor
The ability to always get dubs.
But never more than that (so no trips and such) + no one ever checks'em
the power to fart furiously before making a terrible choice
>>697173063
To be able to shrink or expand my genitalia's general volume by 3 inches.
It's not even for sex purposes in just want actual support for my balls ans if i can shrink them they can actually fit comfortably in briefs cause as it stands boxers are the only comfortably option and when i run it feels like i'm punching my testes into powder. Jockstraps have the same crushing issue.
>>697173063
Being able to sneeze any time I want.
>>697173063
Human lie detector
The power to summon quarters at will
The ability to spawn any type of pizza when outstretching my hand, but the pizza always blasts out at 99 mph
The ability to take my head off once a day.
>>697177478
>minor superpower
>>697177660
dude you could become an assassin with that power
i can make one part of my body really strong at a time so i can make my arm strong but everything else is just regular then i can make my leg strong and arm will be regular again.
I have the ability to materialize tissues but only when I need to blow my nose.
>>697177737
>anon hears a lie in a crowd of people on a date
>BEEPBEEPBEEPBEEP
>glaring red lights go off and he just points at some random stranger with a look of confused horror on his face.
>>697177746
Would receiving pizza at that speed be lethal? I thought I could just be a very evil pizza guy.
>>697177737
That's as minor as they come in my opinion. OP would be to not only be a lie detector but also having the ability to make someone tell the truth.
>>697177746
a pretty bad one either. everybody would know it was pizza man
>>697177912
The ability to make my jizz infertile at will
the power to postpone pain for later, but no longer than a week later
like if i got shot in the shoulder i could choose to feel the pain straight away or start feeling it the day after.
and if i got hurt multiple times and postponed all of that it would be combined.
>>697173063
That kangaroo is fucking jacked
>>697178077
>>697174360 yeah this
>>697178122
That's why I would need a costume, become One Pizza Man.
Teleportation, but
•once per day
•only between two fast food restaurants of the same franchise
•you have to buy something and eat it
test
>>697175419
hahahahaha! an internet for you
>>697178128
Thats pretty OP anon. We want minor powers not the modern day win button.
>>697178077
THE PIZZA IS AGGRESSIVE
>>697178139
Fuuuuckkkkk that noise. I don't think i would want that power. I think I would rather transfer the pain to someone else. Preferably to someone I really don't like.
>>697173297
Just eat Takis Fuego chips, practically the same thing.
>>697178322
Like, you could go from the bathroom stall at McDonald's in Alaska to the bathroom stall in Tokyo, right? That would be cool. Could be the basis for a novel...
Immortality.
It would be a minor superpower because I don't matter to anyone.
>>697178509
id want that power just to say "im going to feel that in the morning"
be able to consume dirt
>>697178901
rip
Every mechanical and electrical appliance in my house works flawlessly.
The ability to give guys blue balls when they piss me off
>>697178509
might be worth it in a life or death situation. Instead of being rendered incapacitated by a stab or a (not immediately lethal) gun wound you'd be in a better position to run or fight.
but either way since you still take the damage and will eventually feel the pain you wouldn't want to be in such a scenario making it a proper "minor" power.
>>697178923
> one pun man
>>697173063
deadly accurate cum shots
>>697178322
I forgot to add:
•You must pick one franchise for your powers to be tied to
•if your franchise goes out of business you lose your powers
•the others are out there
The ability to pet any animal at will.
>>697177415
>volume
>inches
>>697178896
or, go in a mcd's, rob them. Then, make them accept your money to buy a 1$ drink and teleport to another one.
being able to pee my poop and poop my pee
>>697174880
>never needing to buy toilet paper
Think of the savings!
>>697176899
Trynd ult and Sion passive
>>697178896
Yeah, pretty much. Or you forget to factor in timezones and make local news as the Englishman who somehow got locked in a Chinese McDonald's at 4 in the morning.
>>697175965
That made me laugh harder than it should've
check em
>>697175914
>>697179216
mcdonalds it is then. fucking mcdonalds everywhere and they just keep building more.
Ability to refill a pen
>>697175419
kek, this would be awesome
>>697173471
Hahahah
>>697175419
Holy fuck, this is manga material, you could make this into an anime!
>>697177478
It is minor because lie detectors don't work.
X-ray vision, but it is limited to objects/walls made of glass.
>>697180912
isn't that useless
>>697179216
Crazy OP. I would go on a string of McDonald's robberies, save money, and buy a franchise. Then place my Lair under franchise.
>>697177413
Gold
>>697179309
Yes. Inches. As in inches cubed.
>>697181208
Oh shit you're right, I would REALLY like to see through any glass no matter how opaque it is.
To be able to summon maximum zozzle at any time
>>697179571
kek
>>697181704
better
>>697173063
The ability to store my cum in a special organ located in either nard which can swell to gigantic proportions. Never notice I have this power because I haven't gone more than three days without jacking off since puberty. It could be you anon, how would you know ?
The power to get dubs
>>697179185
Kek
>>697182088
wtf
chek'd
>>697182088
the power to bang little lolis
Be able to turn off a part of my body, but I can't turn it back on.
>>697181988
Sarcasm isn't a foreign language taught in schools these days I take it?
Power to spawn a single ork boy every ten years
the power to sense erections
Obviously the power to be comfortable in any heat
The power to teleport yourself to the exact same location.
the power to believe it's not butter
>>697173471
11/10 would read your posts again
to be 13% bulletproof
>>697173565
You stupid dude? Clogging someone's arteries will indeed kill them.
>>697182503
or in a lolis pussy
the ability to transform into an 90 year old russian woman with a weak bladder
>>697182611
fuck off pedo
>>697173063
THE POWER OF MAKING WOMAN WET FOR LOOKING AT ME
IM NOT THAT GOOD LOOKING, I JUST WANT TO SEE THE LOOKS ON THEIR FACES WHEN THEY WONDER WTF WHY AM I GETTING WET AND HORNY FROM A STUMP
>>697182638
Power to turn into Gopnik at will
>>697182662
pedophiles like children idiot, thats like calling a dude who fucks other dudes straight, i bet you are "straight" huh
>>697182564
wish my parents felt that way...
the ability to grow little wings out of my shoes and frills out of my sleeves/trouser legs at will
>>697182662
the power to hold down this bitch and rape her
>>697182610
thats because you don't hear of medical miracles where arteries are suddenly unclogged seconds after being formed
>>697173063
The ability to summon pencils would be fucking rad if you're a teacher. Goddamned kids lose pencils all the fucking time.
The ability to breathe under water for 3 mins but any time over that, you instantly drown
to be able to know exactly what the weather is going to be like for the rest of the day
OR
to be able to reach into my pocket and pull out the exact amount of change i need to buy the thing im buying
>>697173063
Ability to have taco bell appear right infront of me when ever I want.
the power to shit any type of battery at will
The ability to lose a boner at the snap of a finger
ability to kill with cum shots
>>697173471
Fucking kek
The power to silence kids when the are screaming.
Ability only good in Japan where you can tell which women you can get away with groping on the subway and will just stand stock still with a terrified and ashamed look on her face.
The power to blend into fire
>>697183018
one of those could make you a lot of money, the other is literally making money...too major imo
This is going to be the best JoJo's part yet.
the ability to hand stand with your feet
The power to send a small electrical shock to cocksuckers who drive 10 under the speed limit in the left lane.
>>697173063
20-8-5 8-15-12-15-3-1-21-19-20 9-19 1 8-15-1-24
Post this into another thread or you mother will die in her sleep tonight.
>>697182355
I cringed.
>>697183478
OP IMO
I really wish I had the power to piss from the tip of my pointing fringer, so when someone ain't looking I can piss in their cup or something.
The power to fall asleep at night without thinking about death
The power to alter body fat percentage at will over the course of three weeks.
I'm thirsty the whole time
The ability to walk through walls but you fall through floors
the power to fuck hos like these
the power to make hos worship my cock by putting candy on it
The power to stop making people's mothers die when they don't respond to my posts
>>697183954
the power to fit inside of this
the ability to have a good day
>>697174360
thats sick
>>697183522
certified op here fuck your shit don't care if she died
The ability to hold my breath until i die
>>697182683
Kindly remove yourself.
the power to jam vegetables in little cunts
Products work as advertised
The power to slightly cook or uncook my meal at a restaurant if it hasn't been cooked to my liking.
Take that medium-well done steak. You are now medium.
>>697184292
how does it feel wanting to be a pedofile
>>697184292
Who said you're supposed to be here, exactly?
>>697181292
You could hide in a McDonald's bathroom in California at 8:59 pm PST, teleport to a McDs in New York, Rob it, now it's past midnight so it's a new day and then you port to a McDs in Japan. EZ.
the power to teach your daughters to do this
>>697184292
op here you should get the power to fuck off outta here
My power would be that my feet never stink.
To taste every rice I eat individually
>>697173957
That's pretty shit. Being able to turn images in your into paper? All you would ever see ever is paper. You'd be brain dead, your memories and language would turn to paper in your head, you would only ever see paper.
>>697184281
Fuck yes, that would be awesome.
>>697184445
My only power is that I wish you'd leave and fuck off to a loli thread with all your other toddler fuckers, you degenerate.
the ability to have a good connection
Be able to shit and eat simultaneously
>>697184408
file is computers, you mean "phile" and a pedophile isnt the same as cartoons, thats like calling a horror movie fan a serial killer and calling for his death sentence without any crime
learn about laws, and life llittle kiddo, cheer up little tyke ull be like the big boys on /b/ one day lil tiny fella
>>697182535
underrated
Not be depressed all the time
>>697184698
Megasuperpower
The ability to summon tiny pebbles into shoes not large enough that they hurt but just enough to be mildly uncomfortable
Ability to not having to go through all the bullshit with TSA before getting on a plane.
>>697173063
To instantly become sober if I'm drunk
>>697173063
The ability to make busses stall out so everyone's a little late.
>>697184881
op as fuck
>>697184435
the first amendment of the constitution and the men who wrote it and protect it
kids are fucking dumb now, letting the cops tell them legal shit is against the law, fucking fools
>>697184709
But, can you honestly admit that you are not sexually attracted to prepubescent girls?
>>697184472
i was just gonna say u should gain that power too, but u have it, exit out of this tab little ass faggot
The ability to take back a fart if I regret it -
but doing so causes me to inadvertantly fart at some point during my next blow job.
I want the ability that if i stick my finger up someone's ass while he sneeze , he instantly turns white.
doesn't matter black, chinese, albino,
Finger up the ass + sneeze = turns into a normal white guy.
Shit sounds so cash
summon pizza
>>697184668
so you look at those pics and think of toddler sex? you sick fuck
gtfo of /b/
If you want to you can shit as much as you like.
> eat with unclean fingers
> get diarrhea
> become peepee poopoo sprayer overlord
>>697173063
The power to control the passage of time.
Super strength. That's it though. So no extra bone density or anything. I punch through a brick wall but also suffer breaking all of fingers at the sometime
yes, you guys are the ones posting this shit in threads, im just parroting it back to you, and u get mad?
i dont agree with it, but you sure do like it
I can regenerate limbs, except it's the opposite. So if my hand gets cut off my body dies and grows back from the severed hand.
the power to rip a lolis asshole for the first time
Ability to fly.
>>697185353
Except with that kind of muscle strength, you'd be able to absorb the force the wall exerts on you (assuming that all your muscles are equally strong here)
>>697173297
lol, that would actually be awesome to fuck up toilets like that, imagine the disbelief and confusion.
>>697185515
So basically being a starfish
the power to eat dat ass
>>697185197
No, when I look at those pics, I think about the fucking Seinfield theme song.
You moron, I think everyone would benefit if you closed your tab and fucked off like the little faggot you are :^)
>>697179035
Bitch.
the power to always walk in on this action
>>697185612
Yeah, but it's to the smallest extent too. Finger gets cut off? Guess I'm growing a new body.
>>697185405
damn her pussy looks soft and puffy
FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP
The ability to have any vape you use produce sick clouds
>>697185846
gets haircut, thousands of tiny clones, original self dead, barber confused af
The power to fly but my nose needs to touch the ground
>>697174880
That would be amazing. I can rarely get clean from wiping, the paper will keep producing a hint of brown forever. I shower after every shit, thankfully I don't need to shit in public, I have very regular morning shits.
>>697185901
seriously dude? you need fucking help, na jk her pussy looks bomb
>>697173063
To stop my anxiety from ruining relationships.
>>697185961
i know im gonna be fappin for at least 6 hours, damn that lad
>>697184709
Still a faggot
>>697174360
we need dubs so anon becomes a boxer and trashes mayweather
>>697186061
Just use one of these if it's such a hassle
>>697186222
and you are still an idiot, faggots have sex with men, not females fucking moron
>>697178479
>Impliying he would get a chance to use it
>>697175419
Is it gay to think it would be funnier to do this to dudes? It's messier, they would all be confused and going home.
>>697185159
But you can never wash that finger.
>>697175965
>>697186336
u put that in your butt?
>>697185545
So minor
>>697184964
How?
>>697186183
Good for you, anon?
the power to fuck schoolgirls in the classroom
Ability to get a gf
>>697173063
The ability to evacuate your bowels at any time and place of choosing would improve quality of life for anyone more than they might imagine. Just think about it.
>>697186452
I dunno, I've just heard about this, tbh. You might wanna research it.
>>697186570
arent we all fapping to the toddlercon? lol
>>697173063
Ability to teleport solids into my bowels to counter diarrhea
>>697173795
I'm sitting on the shitter reading this. Wishing for the exact same thing.
>>697186660
so like u put the whole thing in your butt and poop comes out the spout sounds uncomfortable and what if it breaks?
didn't think this thread would pick up then get hijacked
Being able to feel no pain for an hour, but beforehand I would experience intense pain all over my body for ten seconds.
>>697186788
damn i thought u meant raping toddlers for a sec lol
>>697174596
Nigger, that's not a super power, that's just pockets. Learn 2 pants.
>>697185405
hot
>>697186957
i sit in my chair with my cock in my hand for that
>>697182573
Would it be that you are hurt 13% less by bullets, or that 13% of your body is completely bulletproof? The latter would make for a neat party trick.
>>697186715
I wouldn't say all, anon
>>697186870
Dude how the fuck would I know? Research that shit, my nigga
>>697186061
Wet wipes?
>>697177888
Checkum
>>697187181
well besides the 1 angry guy, hes not a real person tho
>>697187399
You take that back, he's real and he's my lover.
>>697187332
im telling u thats how its used, doesnt that seem painful and like it could break, or is it painted steel?
>>697183087
Would sure come in handy when my car battery dies
The ability to actually cum from sex
>>697183609
Underrated
>>697187128
first
what, are you fucking gay?
>>697187630
>>697187763
>what, are you fucking gay?
>>697187630
>Tfw years of masturbatibg left my Dick insensitive
>Tfw I can only cum from sex like 25%
>Tfw my gf thinks it's her fault
>>697187898
is he fucking gay?
>>697187985
i think hes fucking gay
>>697188128
>>697188072
>>697187985
>>697187898
>>697187763
>>697187630
what are you fucking gay
>>697177347
But Anon... I already have that power, except people DO check'em
>>697188644
double dubs obvious bot
>>697173220
>minor
>literally chooses all power
>>697186369
>Doing it to some dude while they pass by children or really old people
I'd target solely one person and make him question himself
>>697174177
>change charge of protons and electrons
>antimatter is actually the most expensive material on Earth
>get $$$
You call this "minor"?
My turn: you can sense when all light bulbs in a 10 ft radius will burn out
The ability to become a minor at will.
>>697179571
If you can't find your way out of a fat food joint that is locked up for the night you deserve to starve there
30 extra IQ points.
>>697173220
>>697173951
>I ... I feel compelled to suck your cock anon!
>>697182781
Fuck off pedophile
>>697173471
10/10 would recommend to a friend
>>697188750
Yes I am in fact a bot
>>697189150
Couldn't you use your god powers to make humanity not die out?
the ability to live forever/choose when to die, at the same time you can choose your shape as in 18yo fit, 18yo fat, 40yo fit etc etc. kinda like a shape shifter.
