ITT: You give yourself as a high school freshman advice.
Try to study a bit harder. It's true, rich guys get all the pussy.
Dont worry, Even though u will sleep through all ur classes ull still graduate with ur class. Keep gaming until 5am with no guilt :D
STOP MASTURBATING AND GET BACK TO CLASS
>>697128864
Fuck as many freshman bitches as humanly possible. Your thirty-something self will cherish those memories.
Everyone is going to think you fucked Shannon and Nicole anyway, so just do it. Wear a condom.
>>697128864
Dont fall for victoria.
Drop out go to a city college and then transfer to a uni . you won't deal with all the b.s. of h.s.
>>697128864
Go through will killing yourself, it doesn't get better.
Spend a lot of time with just a few people, not a small amount of time with a lot of people. Take easiest courses so the GPA doesn't suffer
>>697129714
Whats the matter anon? Is it something pancakes cant fix?
Getting good grades actually makes you a lot cooler. Stop trying to look cool and start being cool.
>>697128864
im in love with right grill anon is there more of her?
>>697128864
fuck a hoe
>>697128864
totally wanna get off to that blonde if you can get more of her op
Fuck bitches, make money.
>>697129794
+1 about the friend part. You nailed it
Do not hang out with Josh after the Chem-E car meeting whatever you do
>>697128864
Donate to here, young me
gofundme com/xfmhph8s
>>697130023
Don't fuck butches make money and then fuck barely legal pussy
>>697129969
>>697130004
Not OP but I found the picture on Google images, just reverse search it
Be nicer to your parents. Just do the homework it's not hard at all. Keep playing music and dedicate the most time to it
do ur work
keep hitting that for years but dont fall in love
>>697130104
Agree. Never trusted josh.
"Kill yourself faggot" is what I'd go with
Go after Kendall. She'll be in your life in the future if you don't but you'll realize that you love her which will ruin you since you never see her after you graduate.
>>697129245
fuck off with your like magic
>>697130471
Ow. I dont know why someone celebrating their bday alone always hurts me
>>697129245
Fuck off
girls are a waste of time
fuck your hand forever
Jessie isn't worth your time. She's just going to fuck you up in a few years anyways. Forget about her and get laid.
For the love of God, don't fuck that chick that you fingered during that showing of the "sandlot" movie back in 2006 she is a total crazy bitch.
>>697128864
She is going to cheat on you, be ready when it happens and don't be surprised. The very least I can do for you is tell you it's going to happen.
>>697130650
I always had trust issues and being paranoid doesn't help make lasting friendships.
>>697128864
keeo doing what you're doing, because no matter how much fun everyone makes you're still going to grow up to be a well traveled, smart, nice and well spoken individual.
Use your popularity to start a cult.
Also dont date anyone. Theyre all abusive cunts. This guy will show up later in college who will absolutely adore you. You will match his kink perfectly.
Also dont bother getting a 4.3 gpa. Big name colleges dont give a shit for your grades and sat scores if you dont have the money. Dont stress over homework or grades. You wont ever need perfect straight A's. You will end up going to community college and learning the same shit as that big name college. In fact your professors will be from that big name college.
Get your blood checked out at CHLA in adult medicine department. Trust me.
>>697128864
Keep writing, if you don't you'll pick it up again junior year, but believe you me, you'll want the jump
Stop fucking around and focus on your math classes, get any and all programming/computer related electives. Get at daniela when you meet her, she's beautiful and you'll lose your chance if you don't. Don't even attempt to fuck around with venice, she'll break your heart and WHATEVER YOU DO DON'T FUCK AROUND WITH JEN. Eva is just playing you, don't change gyms and train as much as you possibly can. Fuck chelsea, she changed.
>>697129245
Literally fuck you so hard
Get /fit/ now you fat faggot. There's pussy to crush and hearts to break.
Don't take the people around you for granted. Some of them might not be around for as long as you think.
Dont date that fucking bitch Niki for 5 years because she's never going to put out and you're gonna end up hating her. When that faggot cunt Cole Sanders threw his cleat at y ou in the football locker room, you should have just decked that mother fucker instead of worrying about the consequences. When Eric Holguin punked you almost every day, you should check his ass too. Stop being such a pussy.
Oh and one last thing, stop playing World of Warcraft after wrath of the lich king.
If you are caught with drugs, tell the teacher that you are taking/smoking it because you recently watched bestiality that featured a horse and a pig with bondage. It worked for me, and they never bothered me for the rest of my four years
>>697128864
What's a good major similiar to psychology but actually makes money?
>>697128864
Joe, kill yourself.
Don't be such a dick.
Don't be such an asshole.
Get better grades.
Tell dumb bitched what they want to hear and then insult them.
Finish that chemisty/geology degree
Stay the fuck away from Deanna, Jackie and probably Diane although she is a great fuck. Deanna is a waste of a human being.
Slow the fuck down when you drive.
Seriously though slow the fuck down when you drive. The fines and lawyers fees are a financial motherfucker.
Don't waste your money on pot, booze and whores.
Stay clear the fuck away from short Kim with the huge tits. They're fun but she's a psycho cunt. Not worth it.
Learn more about computers and programming.
>>697131313
checked triple 13's
Just go for it.. to youre bette r off at least knowing you and her werent meant to be. Also, dont waste your time thinking the first time you have sex should be with a girlfriend. Just fuck anyone you can without trying to make it meaningful. Also, stop being lazy. Your habbits WILL fucking follow you. Loosen up. Stop walking like a robot. I had ti wait till i got a job to become a norm as l socially functioning human being. You should get a job. Smile more. Arent you tored of peoole asking if youre depressed? Get off of runescape. Youll be done with it later on anyway. Stop wasing your time. Please learn to call your friends once in a while and stop waiting for peoe to call you. That weird girl straight from japan/china with the odd baggy jeans? Have sex with her. That girl asking for your test answers in class? Give the answers and offer to to do homework in exchange for her tight ass. Jaspers mom? Try to fuck that milf. Dont trust that dude with your friends ipod. Don't drop out of algebra honors. You actually get a higher grade. You know you can blow through algebra. Who cares if she actually grades the homework. In algebra 2 everyone wondered how you slept through class and did good on every test because you litterally just copied one of each example she did to learn it. Play a sport. That girl behind you in rotc was dtf.
>>697131313
>Oh and one last thing, stop playing World of Warcraft after wrath of the lich king.
best advice so far itt
out of nowhere and at the same time 3 different girls will show interest in you. fuck all of them.
learn the piano, dont get into cars
>>697128864
Walk with a pickle in ur ass
Be more confident. Help your Dad more.
Fuck Melanie. Seriously. her and Tammy.
But avoid any romantic entanglements with them and keep them good friends.
Melanie's boyfriend is virtually a rapist and Tammy might have stayed in the country.
>>697128864
Drop out now. Those 2 years you'll spend waiting are a waste of time.
While you're at it start that business now rather than wait cause thats 2 years of back pay i could have spent by now.
Drugs are fun to experiment with why the fuck would you wait for those?
Those 2 chicks totally wanted it from the get go don't wait 2 more years to grow a spine cause thats 2 years of highschool banging you missed with them.
>>697131740
From saskatchewan?
>>697129245
Allahu al balcu
>>697128864
Lift
Socialize more
Approach girls with confidence, flirt with that cutie from the back
Don't let go of your dreams
Visit your family
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA jk faggot , here's a list of winning lottery numbers
>>697130962
sauce of that pic?
>>697128864
mam will be ok with it when you tell her youre a girl inside
Fuck L.C C..H H.L C.O. M.R. C.R. try to fuck K.T. and D.M
they wouldn't mind.
Also take water polo and quit band - pit
>>697128864
Pull your dick everyday so you don't become an adult with a micro penis
Steal the panties during gym class
>>697128864
Look dude you're gonna get a lot of acne while in highscool, people will always comment about it but don't owrry almost a week after your graduate (I fucking kid you not) it will all go away. You'll be lonely and have moments like any other angsty teen, but one thing I can tell you...stay away from Emily, she doesn't like you for more than a friend. Chase after Jasmine before Shaq's brother steals her away, focus in school and most importantly be happy for the great friends you're going to make because once you graduate those two guys are gonna be the only people who care about you until you turn 20 closer to 21.
Fuck your science teacher and Spanish teacher
>>697128864
Fuck all the girls while theyre easy
Moderate your coffee intake,breath,be,they to shall pass into the flame....first do no harm,let food be they medicine...skim read all the non fiction books at the library and buy some decent condoms for Christ sakes
FUCK JANET WHEN YOU GET THE CHANCE
Your best friend is schizophrenic and needs help. You will get a girlfriend at 17, but she is a psychopath. Expect your sister to come mooch off your home soon, she's getting a divorce. Don't eat the fish. That cheerleader likes you, so ask her the fuck out. Go for a jog. Get a job. Get some leather and denim in that wardrobe. Minecraft is starting, so invest in it and learn to host. AP isn't worth it, drop out of Calculus. And get fucking contacts for the love of god, you fucking autist
brace yourself lil bitch
>>697128864
Kill yourself now.
>>697128864
Work harder
Pretend to date girls to get their nudes. That shits like gold when you trade them
Fuck that freshman girl who wanted to fuck you senior year
Take that shitty C++ and Java classes
Get out of track and swimming because that shits not gonna get you anywhere
Fuck with every teacher. Cause them to purposely hate you so you have an excuse to skip that class with minimal effort and use it as a scapegoat.
The janitor does sell drugs for less than your one in the junior class
Fuck with the school security staff so much that they never want to talk to you
Skip 2 days a week instead of 4.
When filling out the school registration, put your own number instead of your moms.
Learn how to hop fences better than your school police officer.
Know that none of the school video cameras actually work
After school bring your own basketball and write your name on it because niggers will steal it
Take as many elective classes in the beginning of your freshman year. Don't fail any freshman or sophomore years, then you'll be able to only go to 1 class senior year which will lead to it being an elective which you actually don't need the credit and can officially start your summer early.
Get a part time job instead of playing sports
IT jobs are fucking gold and where the money's at
Don't trust any thots
Don't trust any bitch niggas
Keep your social circle small
Don't admit or snitch on anything
Fuck the principle
Piss on the fat IT teachers car, preferably in the gas tank, get a screw driver to pop the lid open
"Just do your thing, kiddo. It all will shape you to be the man you will become. By the way, here's these 1.6 billion lottery winning numbers.."
You catch more flys with honey
The people you meet might be you or believe they are aliens from different cultures with a narrative that ultimately undermines you personally so exclude these if and when possible from every possible facet within your personal existance tunnel recognizing the nneed for them to exist in some form aswell....get girls drunk and they will fuck
Meth is cheaper and works better
Hey man boobs. You know how you fucked your knee up over the summer? Well get ready for decade of painkiller andI heroin use. Also, you'll lose your virginity to a fat chick at the end of September. Then you'll not get laid for a year. Then you'll date that girl for 4 years and break up with her on her birthday because you're a scumbag, but it's cool, you'll get your turn at heart break 5 years later when the girl you dumped her for dumps you. Also, remember that heroin I mentioned? Yeah that's gonna get you kicked out, so brush your teeth more often now. It's hard to do when you're living in your car for a year. Anyway. You're in debt now, but your life is getting on track again. You get some great pussy, but honestly, kill yourself. Oh! When that girl dumps you, don't get back together with her. Date your really hot Puerto Rican co worker instead. Otherwise you have to wait like 6 years to fuck her.
>>697128864
Buy a shitload of nintendo stock and sell after Pokemon Go comes out
Kill yourself
>>697128864
Don't enlist. Get a buisiness degree and a job at a mortgage lender- money above all. Do coke earlier. It's nothing to be scared of. Fuck without love, love is bad. Empathy is fucking weakness. This world exists for your pleasure.
>>697138336
/thread
Go and get your head sorted out. The depression you have is gonna blow out to fully diagnosed Bipolar, which will fuck up most of your adult life until now. Drinking the pain away will only make it worse.
Also, those chubby chicks that were keen as fuck on you in school and the early pub days - fuck them and don't give a shit what others think. Cause you'll end up going through a MASSIVE dry spell.
Also, try calling Amanda more than once. Don't try once, get answering machine, and then don't bother. She was keen as hell on you. Take advantage of it.
On July 26th 2016 buy a powerball ticket with the numbers 10 47 50 65 68 24.
>>697129245
eh, not reposting. There's probably worse ways to die. At least I'll finally get to touch a girl. Maybe she will lay on top of me. I hope she doesn't mind me having a boner while she is trying to kill me.
>>697128864
don't OD on those quetiapine, don't smoke the devil's lettuce. better to die with your mind and soul in tact.
buy up silver polish & codeine, follow through.
believe me, it's not worth going on.
When that girl said you were cute. Don't run away, talk to her.
>>697138427
I said the same thing to Donald J. Trump when he was 15. I guess it worked out.
if you already have good friends be a phony with everyone you meet in there, it's amazing the things you can get
>>697128864
Next year, you will figure out none of this shit matters. None of this shit matters. You're welcome on getting a year's head start. Your out-of-school life is now going to be fun... and sometimes dangerous. The drugs that are coming your way when the fun begins, do them in moderation.
Fuck those two passed out chicks at Brad's party, and steal their panties
>>697128864
Don't join IB.
>>697128864
>Turns out you have a big dick, use it
Don't do anything different. You're going to be a fucking stud.
Maybe also.... yes those girls staring at your really do want to fuck your brains out and you should impregnate all of them.
>>697128864
It's the hardest thing in the world for you to make long term goals and stick with them, but you have to do it.
Get used to going to the library. Go there every day and actually do homework. Spend as little time as you can at home. If you do this, you will get good grades. This is important. Take the bullshit programming class. It'll do you more good than shop or drafting classes because you suck at both.
Make new friends. Jimmy will become a pedo and Michael into a nutjob conspiracy theorist who will stab you in the back.
It'll piss them off, but stop going to that church. It's bullshit. Read Luther, Calvin, and Schaeffer instead.
You are not ugly. That babyfat can be cured with time. Tonya is a bitch and Nicki is shallow as fuck. Don't bother asking them out. Ask out Heather. She'll probably say yes though she's very shy.
Take Latin seriously and take it every year. Plan now to leave after graduation and never look back. Join a real club like Forensics or scholar bowl. FBLA is worthless to you.
Mostly, I want you to know that you will do amazing things with your life even if you don't follow my advice. However, why suffer when you don't have to?
>>697128864
Learn HVAC now fucko.
tell mom you love her more.
Dont take Japanese. Also don't get involved with Grace, she's kinky and edgy.
>>697128864
no matter how much he begs you:
DO NOT FUCK YOUR GIRLFRIEND'S 14-YEAR OLD BROTHER
here's another one:
MATHS ARE IMPORTANT AND YOU SHOULD STUDY HARDER
here's another one:
ALWAYS USE A CONDOM AND PULL OUT BEFORE YOU CUM
I had three big bite marks on my arse before I got out of school
>>697128864
Pnch fagit op in facE
Make friends outside of the ones you had in primary school which were all a grade above me, because if you don't you're going to spend much of class and lunch time a loner.
>>697129926
>Is it something pancakes cant fix?
zomg, this was literally my dad's answer to everything lol
>>697140639
Kek bet u r fat weeabu faggot
>>697131665
Artificial Intelligence
Get a decent source for Xanax. It could change your life.
For context I have crippling social anxiety which prevented me from having any friends in hs. Borderline selective mutism level.
>>697140922
I bet u r a gae nigur
>>697129245
Thanks Immunity Cat
>>697141334
Lucky guess.
rape her no matter what "classy wink"
Spend more time with dad, he wont be around in another 6 years.
Keep being awesome, me. And check em.
>>697141502
You weren't wrong either
don't be such a beta about HS pussy, hit it and quit it, you'll never see these girls again. none of them are worthwhile anyway.
ignore your GPA since it's fine anyway, focus on the AP tests, since those will help you enormously with college credits and save you thousands of dollars.
dont be such a loner, try to be a leader. a leader has followers.
don't try to be in every club you dumb fuck. focus on 1-2 and be excellent at those.
if you think a girl might be interested in you, she's screaming that she's interested in you, because they're so fucking passive aggressive. hit it and quit it.
always wrap it for hos, raw dog it for the ones you love.
you'll almost die senior year from a car accident. It's in November, drive slow, be smart.
if you can, enlist in the military for the experience and colleagues, and freebies and pension.
Respect your body, work out every day and stop doing drugs. Eat more fruits and veggies. Don't take the county job..
you're a woman, start hormones now or you will regret it, you little bitch
Don't try to be a unique snowflake when it comes to your wardrobe. If wearing skinny jeans is what gets the girls, do it. It's better to be a "poser" who gets laid than some honest virgin.
>Ask Kayla out, you faggot
>Take your grades seriously
>Get a job, ASAP. Being poor sucks.
Calm the fuck down. Nothing you think is 'real' music or 'real' movies or 'real' tv matters for shit because all desires and likes are equally valid given the unlimited number of potential circumstances leading to them. STFU and learn to appreciate everything life has to offer instead of being an insufferable cunt thinking your opinions have more value than others.
>>697141951
>ahs
Don't try to be cool. Tattoos are not cool. Do not fucking start doing crystal meth at 15 and get dumb tattoos at 16 on meth and drunk. Don't try to be fucking cool that shit passes. Stick with one hobby don't be decent at 100, master 1 you attention seeking shit. You are a piece of garbage and aren't entitled to shit until you prove you arent, quit leeching off of the accomplishments of your parents. Also blood on the dance floor will really fuck your head up for a year or so if you start listening to them,they suck and they're for girls. Yeah I know you think you would never but trust me you do and you turn into a girl for awhile
Oh also stay with Carly she loses weight and gets,really hot
Honestly don't give a fuck about anything because nothing is important and the world is going to go to shit over the course of the next decade.
>>697129245
Immunity cat faggot
if you could go back and stop someone from dying , would you? Or would you just let life take its natural course
Party less, study more.
>>697128864
Fuck as many chicks as possible, especially Amanda
>>697129245
Fuck you
>>697128864
Never again will you be surrounded by so much naive pussy, so be confident, not cocky, and you get the babes. (All chicks are attracted to guys who are proud to be themselves)
>>697128864
In a few years, your sister will give birth to a girl. You will love her as much as any uncle is legally allowed to love his niece. The first time you hold her, you will vow to do anything to make her happy, and protect her to the best of your ability.
However, when she turns 11, she will get a cellphone, and start texting you. At one point, she will reveal something shocking about herself in confidence. Do not freak out too much. Be as supportive as possible!
Because it's only going to get worse. In fact, she's very confused sexually, right now. And the whole world will be against you on this. Try not to let it get to you too much. She is a teen now, and you know how you are at this age.
She still loves you deep down, sorta. Just give her time and space.
Also, learn how to hack and nuke a site called "tumblr". It might help in the long run.
Nothing. Shit turned out fine.
Fuck scool, smoke weed, fuck all the bitches(use a condom).
In 2008 There global Stocks will crash.
Ask your Sister how to make money out of that.
Invest in
league of legends (riot games )
Pharmaceutical industry (the Stocks wont stabelize in a long time mainly meds are the only things allways needed.)
Private Military sector (they will take over many Jobs in the degenerating global Military forces)
Don't invest openly.
Do Not,i repeat , DO NOT invest
as a Person. Be undercover. No names, no pictures.
Bei careful to only Talk about this shit to your sis/dad. Moms Not stable enough to Deal with shit. Just make her shut up by giving her money so she can quit her Job and travel (be careful of the sandniggers they will go all out Allah huakbar!!! BOOM on icecream Shops, Restaurants and conventions in Islam Lands as well as in eurofuck.)
Fuck scool; but don't fuck education!
Buy your own scool. Soak in that juicy wisdom.
Get a private army and build a private luxury Bunker in the hills. (Things Don't look too well on a global scale humans will eventually fail)
Have as many children as possible with diff. Woman. Those genes have to be spread for the emperor!
Maybe become a doctator or some shit. Who cares, have fun.
AND FUCK TEAM VALOR!!
>>697143837
okay, ive gotta know: trans, dyke or into you?
Be nicer to your mom she'll be dead in a few years. Make sure you tell both amber's to fuck off. One won't put out. One will ruin your life. Stay a stoner, seriously if you do hard drugs just kill yourself now because it's gonna get bad.
>>697128864
you shoulda smoked weed earlier.
>>697137882
>The people you meet might be you or believe they are aliens from different cultures with a narrative that ultimately undermines you personally so exclude these if and when possible from every possible facet within your personal existance tunnel recognizing the nneed for them to exist in some form aswell....
........ go on please
GET GOOD GRADES!, DO NOT BLOW YOUR MONEY! STAY AWAY FROM DRUGS and for fuck sakes go to post secondary school after highschool
>>697129245
no pls
Turn in your work n fuck dem bitches that give it up
buy more bitcoins
buy an assault rifle because it doesnt, in fact, ever get any better.
You're much more attractive than you think you are. Girls are into you. Stop doubting they're into you, it's obvious to everyone around you, but you keep denying yourself the opportunities because of your lack of confidence.
The future you, at 25, is still a virgin and has still never had a girlfriend. Girls are all over you, but you have the same issue still; you deny yourself the opportunity and now it's even worse because you fear the inexperience.
Man the fuck up and make a move on one of these girls; change history, for my sake.
>>697128864
Lrn 2 grammar
>>697128864
Do it, faggot! There's nothing too look forward to.
Don't get raped by that one guy in gym.
If you have tons of really embarassing childhood or pre-high school memories that others know, do not talk to them. They will do nothing but bring back said memories and prevent you from creating friends. Better yet, kill yourself if you really can't escape the embarassing memories.
>>697129245
i'll fuck her
>>697143837
What is the shocking something??
>>697144245
Originally a Dyke, then figured she was asexual as well. Then figured she's trans, because one of her friends came out as trans. I dunno. She changed her name to basically a gender-neutral version of what my sis told her what they would've been named if she was born a boy. She told friends, they started calling her that. At least that's what she told me. Whether she's seriously considering a sex change, I don't know. My sister says no, but doesn't expand on it much. Kinda wish she would.
Whether she's into me, I hope not, despite where I am right now. Because that would make me feel even shittier right now. For... reasons. She's attempted at least twice (once when she came out as a dyke because of one of her friends not taking it to nicely, and another because she acted like a little shit, to put it bluntly, about her being trans and all, and lost all her friends) and is on antidepressants now.
Start hrt
"You will get Friends eventually! In a few years your social life will expand rapidly. Don't care for the people that don't like you, you shouldn't care about them. Perry and Miguel have got comnections to your real Friends, the Ravers."
-18yo, just graduated high school (Netherlands)
>pic related, I now throw Raves for fun
>>697141599
This.
I know that feel.
Hey anon, quit smoking weed and go to class save your money you idiot you make enough to get a shitty car. When he gets cancer help him I know its sad and you hate it because you dont know what to do. Dont blame them they're doing the best they can. And when you meet her anon dont show her your dubs.
>>697145219
>>pic related, me at a rave
>outside
>daylight
>please respond
>>697128864
>Don't go for Blondie. Aim for the redhead, and be willing to settle on the brunette.
>For real, there are more than 3 dateable girls in a class of 400 kids.
>Put yourself out there, don't glom onto bitchy girls that don't return your feelings.
>Don't play magic in the garage all weekend, your friends are all older than you and you'll be fucked when you're a senior.
Play football but still hangout with your nerd friends
>>697128864
Listen to Bach. Pick up classical guitar. Stop caring about anyone but yourself.
It doesn't get better just eat all the pills already
>>697128864
Bring more ammo
Disown your sister
Don't listen to the people trying to shame you for it. She's toxic and doesn't deserve to be in your life.
Work smarter
Not so much harder
Stop trying to get milk from the hardware store.
Get acceptance and friendship from the people willing to give it to you. I know you really wanna get in with the cool kids, but they're phonies pieces of shit who don't deserve you're time. It'll save you a lot of time, frustration, and confusion
Speaking of phonies.
Don't be afraid to be more authentic.
You like to put on this front of being happy and energetic, but people can see right through it and know that's not how you really are inside. People will respect you more if you be more like yourself
Find any and every way you can to fall in love with learning and school. I know the mere thought of school and acadamia viscerally sets off your avoidance bells. But not changing this while you can won't end up in the super yummiest of places.
Treat yourself more. Take out more time for you. Just love yourself.
>don't hang out with the pot heads, you don't even smoke.
>stop being fat, try to lose a lot of that weight now, instead of dropping 10 pounds per year like I did, try to get those 30-40 pounds off during your freshmen year, healthy way of course.
>Stop playing Guild Wars alllllllll day.
>Actually try to not get friend zoned by every female.
>Learn to advance, and take opportunities.
>Summer school is a waste of time, they won't let you graduate early for some reason, or take half days off, even if you are ahead by like 60 credits...
>You're going to get shitty grades, you have no desire to learn Spanish, take French instead, you suck at math, it's fine.
>Dear god, band will be complete garbage, just drop out of it now, you won't be able to change instruments, you're one of the 5 people in California that actually play baritone, so you are stuck.
Know what, fuck it, I tried to change myself, and did, and guess what? Life is shit, just do what you wanna do, it doesn't matter, you will never feel happiness ever again.
>>697145518
It started St about 10 pm, and we contunued way past 8am, so this pic was taken at the end of the Rave, with still some ravers sitting in the grass
"Ask out Pauline or sera now while they're ugly. They'll say yes because low self esteem. Pauline gets crazy hot in senior year and sera gets tits and ass like you wouldn't believe"
You did everything fine, this time just date that brunette from the college prep course you will sign up for in sophomore year. She is practically the only girl worth caring for and she will do more for you than you'll ever expect. Plus she understands your humor more than anyone else you will meet in the next 8 years. Trust me and do it.
Leave 4chan.
>>697144879
Also, if you have a history of embarassing, sperge or autistic moments , then there is no way that you will wind up with a partner in high school. The memories will be burned into the minds of your middle school classmates, continuing to spread to other high schoolers that you don't know. Eventually, nearly everyone in your grade will know about your cringy moments before high school. If you want to save the trouble of embarassing yourself further, then never think about being in a relationship with anyone. It doesn't matter about your sexuality, your embarassing/sperge memories will spread faster if you are looking for love.
>>697128864
Underage b&
>>697128864
just kill yourself. its not gonna get any better
>>697146144
I wish I had taken this advice.
>>697145678
Guild Wars!
>As a boy I spent much time in these lands.
>>697146144
Seconded
Dear Freshman Me,
Invent Facebook. Also, 9/11 is going to happen, so make sure you have a good joke primed for when that first tower falls during 1st period.
Stop fucking your sister. Sure, its all in good fun and nobody is getting hurt, but eventually you will struggle to be sexually attracted to anyone else.
Embrace your racism. It will make you more fun and interesting at parties.
Nickleback is about to become highly ridiculed. Pretend to hate it NOW, before its cool. Chumbawumba will never make another hit, so stop getting your hopes up.
Don't date Nicole, she has hair around her areolas and after you tell the whole school, she kills herself. Just avoid her, because at her funeral you find out that her grandfather is black, and dating a dead quadroon won't help your social status.
Do more drugs more often.
Take the opportunity to suck that black guy's dick in the locker room. You could have been taking the dick daily for the rest of the year and you'd never see him again after that.
That was a huge dick and you won't come across another one like that. The convenience of that arrangement where you could just go into the locker room and fuck, just the two of you, was ideal.
>>697129245
Don't try to be someone you're not, cause even if you do get people to like you, you can't keep pretending forever. May as well be yourself from the get go and just take those people on as friends.
Also punch Kim in the gut when you get the chance.
>>697146795
that got me hard
>>697128864
don't try to grow out long hair, at least cut the sides
shit, I've had great time in HS I don't even wanna change anything
There is love, but no such thing as "true love." Stop expecting to find "the one" and get your dick wet. Also, try to knuckle down and concentrate on your studies, see if you have ADD or something because the shit you can't understand becomes easy as shit when you start to mature
> build your confidence up
> the bad times will go
> there a who really likes you but you're both too shy to approach each other
> keep up the good study, it'll pay off
> don't let the opinions of others weigh you down
> when you're at one of your best mates birthday, there will be a girl who has come just to see you (she's a tag along with her friend.) She'll ask you to go with her "outside" for time just for you two. Do it.
> Mum won't be around forever, love her as much as you can
> dont let life slip you by, its out there to be lived.
There is no god. You're not going to hell if you fuck someone.
Don't marry Jamie.
Don't join the Army
Stay In florida
Study more.
>>697147255
>Had great time in HS
Fuck off you normie. This thread is only for edgelords.
>>697128864
Don't touch the penguin.
>>697128864
do what you're doing
>>697148001
I feel like this needs a greentext.
Ask her out
>>697141611
Mah nigga
>>697129245
Thank you immunity cat
>>697131665
Advertising. Major in one and minor in the other. They go hand in hand.
Don't spill the spaghetti
>>697128864
Don't worry about skipping classes. Do not skip math, ever, anything else is at your discretion, balance it out, in the end you will suffer no repercussions. Also do not skip any other classes that have an exam at the end of hs. After you have enough grades for a class move it to the top of your skip list, unless it's an exam class. Do NOT try to go to every shitty class,, remember the exam ones and fuck the rest. Highschool is mostly a useless time sink.
Ok, so at this point in your life you might be noticing that the constant anxiety and impending doom in your life is quite hard to live with, especially in social situations. Get comfy, it's here to stay. Up to this point you have considered in the back of your mind that something is wrong with you. It's time to face it. You have social anxiety disorder. You will improve over time, but start fixing yourself early. Put yourself in uncomfortable, anxiety filled situations asap and as much as you can. Don't be sad, there's an ironic plus to it, you are actually highly emotionally intelligent, use that.
Do NOT give a single fuck about grades, I know you think you don't but they do make you feel down. At the end, only the exam matters, and let's just say you were meant for great things.
You will have 4 opportunities to fuck. Don't mess em up you sperg, just be natural. Avoid opportunity #2.
OK, so now that you know all of this, use your newly aquired guilt free time on self-improvement. Play guitar, workout, and learn foreign languages. Do not be ever afraid of picking up something new. You are great at learning and quick.
>>697142022
nice to see that you grew up from that. Congrats!
Sports isn't everything. Take time off to heal. You'll thank me later.
Don't settle. Your sweetheart ends up leaving you anyway. You can fuck around with at least 4 girls that you are really into. Do it before they get fat, pregnant, or married. Don't let Christina move in with your best friend. Apply to more than one university. If you end up being a drug dealer, learn to use a bank or you'll get stolen from for all you're worth.
>>697146995
The dick or the story?
>>697131032
>blood
What's wrong with you, anon?
>>697128864
I honestly just wish I loved my mother more than I did. I was a bratty little shit and she wasn't around for as long as I would have liked. Having someone pass that you love dearly but treat like shit out of ignorance is a truly horrible feeling. I would give everything to change that.
Be nice to those 2 kids that everyone shits on all the time. Also, don't show up to school on 4/20/99.
>>697128864
>Stop being so obnoxious
>You know that sexy Mexican chick with the creamy looking boobs? She thinks you're cute and might want sex, make a move
>Remember to be patient
>yes, that weird girl with the dark brown hair is gonna date you, we're still together and she's your prom date
>speaking of prom, you're prom king
>Ask about fixing your teeth sooner
>don't trust that guy who you hang out with so much, he's gonna piss you off in a few years
>Yes, sex is pretty good
>Stop with the extreme politics, people will think you're closed minded
>Don't be an idiot about coming home
>For the love of breasts, stop being so hopeless, it's a waste
>Tobacco is your friend, but not how you think
>You're not getting a band or a car, but rather way better stuff
>Don't make death jokes when grandpa dies
>Keep pushing yourself in gym
>Watch how you carve that pumpkin
>>697128864
How old is freshmen? I'm not American
But i'd tell me 10 - 12 year old self to get ready, cause there's a lot of fuckwits in your school and class
1. tell the parents you want to start getting into exercise/fitness and get them to either get you some weights or a gym membership and hit that shit hard.
2. maybe also take fighting/self defence classes
and 3. when high school comes, be crazy and mean as fuck when you have to, fight anyone and everyone who gives you any shit at all, and be someone people are afraid to fuck with.
you'll get in trouble and no one will like you, but it doesn't matter, because these people don't matter.
>>697138113
>bottle of water
>toothpaste
>toothbrush
How fucking hard is it to brush your teeth?
>>697129245
M8 I ain't about to have that bad juju on my hands
Don't try to make other people happy. Get good grades for yourself, not because someone told you to.
Also, don't skip 3 levels of math. You're smart, but you're not that smart. Another reason why you should take care of yourself, and not try to impress other people. You're going to get hurt.
don't take that blunt to the face before the game
>>697148958
13-14
try and fuck everything that moves................................oh wait, thats what i did
>>697128864
Can I just listen to what he has to say? I think he just needed someone to talk to.
Lol Chantel went and had a family without you, faggot. Grow a pair and learn how to talk to people that want to be your friend.
>>697150112
That hurt me
>>697150005
>try and fuck everything that moves................................oh wait, thats what i did
>try
>oh wait, thats what i did
kek
>>697128864
play football
talk to that girl
make friends with that guy sooner
make mad gains
>>697129245
thanks immunity cat
>>697129245
Im scared daddy
>>697150448
go away spider
>>697128864
Don't date cucks (personal experience)
>>697150263
It hurts more that I still don't have anyone to talk to, even my so called friends don't want to be there for me despite the fact I've always been there for them.
>>697128864
Finance, health care, engineering is where the money is. Money will not make you happy but it eliminates most of the shit that makes you miserable.
Choose to BE wealthy and instead of trying to appear wealthy. Jews don't get rich driving Escalades. Buy the used Honda.
Start running and lifting now and don't wait until 33.
Go ahead and fuck the Spanish teacher. She won't look that good for much longer.
Go to a junior college for first two years and live at home. Work. Transfer and get the BS. Profit.
>>697128864
Es all good, bro. But here's the winning numbers for future lottos as a bonus..
>>697130471
You're talking to yourself retard
Get the anti anxiety pills sooner. It will cost you your fucking entire life if you don't.
Invest your money into Google and Apple. Cash out on both sometime in 2016. You won't have to do shit for the rest of your life.
>>697128864
I'd lie to him and say you end up alright. Let him have his fun while he can.
>>697150448
Fuck off you spider
They aren't demons speaking to you. It's not a spirit of any kind. You're a schizophrenic, and you'll go undiagnosed for several years because your piece of shit religious parents don't believe in mental health.
>>697128864
STOP MASTURBATING
DO NOFAP
MASTURBATION WILL RUIN YOUR LIFE AND PLUNGE YOU INTO A DOWNWARD SPIRAL THAT YOU SPEND YOUR WHOLE LIFE REGRETTING
Do drugs and drink alcohol now, get it out of your system. Because when you get a job at 17 and start tasting independence, you'll derail at the wrong time. Get wasted and tell that one girl to fuck off because she will ruin your life.
>>697128864
Don't date Lisa. Don't even talk to her, EVER. Date melanie instead.
>>697129245
Cancer
>>697153081
Ruin it how?
>>697128864
Don't attempt to go to university, go to the army college, before it is too late
>>697151269
>tfw that wasn't the first thing i thought of
>>697130962
My life was ruined because I was too trusting. People will always find a way to take advantage, even if they don't consciously do it.
>>697128864
Don't drink
>>697150448
8 legged cunt, kill yourself
>>697150112
THIS
>>697150112
>tfw this is now a feels thread
>>697153196
Look up nofap.
Your body is biologically designed to get you laid and when it's consistently getting sexual release all the time it has no reason to make you try and you turn into a sweaty, awkward stammering hunchback.
The difference between me masturbating and me on nofap is night and day. Some people actually thought I had a twin brother because they change is so drastic.
>>697128864
be nicer to the kids who share your interest. dont try to be friends with the kids you dont share anything in common with.
try to stay under the radar as much as you can, people wont recognise you as a real person until the later years.
and ffs when layla ask if you want her to hook you up with teagan say yes you dumb fuck
Dont date her. To clingy, too mich baggage, to uncaring. Will be and still is an emotional drain everyday.
No matter how fucked up your family gets, no matter how much you get abused, how much drugs your mother takes or how many of your friends will kill themselves, remember everything will turn out alright.
>>697154401
fuck i had a girl like that. too many problems and didn't give a shit about me in return. always made shit about her
>>697154001
Holy shit can I turn back or have I passed the point of no return I've been fapping everyday for a few years now
>>697129245
i usually go to sleep completely high, with no train of thoughts whatsoever, so ahah jokes on you faggot.
>>697154488
Here are some golden quotes from our last fight
"Literally every fight we have is because of you."
"Why would i want our parents to meet?"
"Sorry i talk without thinking but its still true, i dont care what you think"
its just the little things that add up. Im gonna end it soon. Have to.
>>697140662
>MATHS ARE
burgerstani education, ladies & gents.
>>697154528
IT'S NEVER TOO LATE
I can and will be a martyr for anyone and everyone that will listen to I can save them from themselves
Masturbation is a drug like anything else that is worse for you long term in exchange for quick easy gratification
Please, start now. Look up the nofap community on reddit. I know you may not like reddit but I believe it's the biggest and best community from people overcoming their masturbation addictions
>>697128864
See that big black kid? You're going to break his nose.
Kick harder than you think you should. Maybe if you kick hard enough you can kill the fucker.
>>697128864
enjoy the word filters while you can
>>697154952
You really got me thinking of the times before I was fapping so much back when I could make eye-contact with females I'm going for it thanks anon just deleted my porn folder
>>697129344
these
Also:
Study even if you don't need it yet. You'll need the ability to study when the material gets hard enough. It matters fuck all how good you are in school, nobody will care after the next degree; spend the time making memories. Go with data science from the start, don't into chemistry. You have oodles of free time, build up a breath of knowledge while you can fail without penalty. You'll have three true friends; keep the contact up. Take what you can; give everything back. Don't impress; be genuine; you only loose from living as a tourist in your own life.
>>697154952
I'm replacing my porn collection with nothing but old master drawings. I still have tens of thousands of porn pics but I can't bring myself to delete them.
>>697155456
Good on you man
Remember, an addiction is something that's worse for you long term in exchange for quick and easy gratification. You can overcome it though
Good luck dude, check out that community
Man up pussy.
thats all i need
>fuck kristy
> no seriously fuck kristy
> don't move out
> don't take that shity job at papa johns
> tell Meaghan to go fuck herself every time you see her
> smoke as much fucking pot as humanly possible
> fuck miss schilling she gets fired for it anyways
> buy a 240 not a shitty mustang
I could do this all day
>chances are your parents know about it
>don't bitch; get shit done
>brush your fucking teeth; shave
>experince > theory
>do the fucking paperwork to get a job; being poor sucks ass; the xp is worth even more than the money
Don't be a bitch.
smoke weed when you get the chance and in a few years when she says she likes you more than the other guy, trust her
>>697129344
>ull still graduate with ur class
you must be pretty pathetic if "graduate[ing] with ur class" is a success
highschool is so fucking easy that you'd have to be literally retarded to fail
End your life.
Trust me little anon, you don't want to know what happens after high school.
Blow your brains out with that shotgun. Follow Kurt Cobain, keep listening to Nirvana and then shoot yourself in the head
Don't get greedy with sex.
When Amanda comes on to you take it.
Stop drinking to oblivion at parties
>>697155890
>buy a 240 and not a shitty Mustang
This guy knows.
>>697128864
>start lifting now
>high protein diet
>you're not a nigger so don't smoke weed
>emily has the herp
>actually try in school
>don't drink pop
>don't climb clays cliffs with the guys
>>697128864
mo naked hoes
>>697128864
when rachel shows up in 10th grade, just keep on walking. not worth the bullshit and she doesn't put out.
Go after Beth, she's crazy and not much to look at, but the sex is amazing and she is into everything that you're into. Yes, even that thing with the- yeah....that. Saves you two years chasing Serena only to realise she's using you just before she puts on a load of weight.
>>697129245
immunity cat saved me
Don't coast during academics, don't wait to join track those people are pretty chill and fuck the red headed chick so hard she loves you forever
>>697155569
>Look; at; me; I'm; so; smart; I; use; semicolons.
Don't Bother with a GF from another school.
Fuck Derya,Elizabeth,Rita,Vanessa,Derian,Karla,
Michelle,Amy
>>697145984
Pic related
>>697140870
I wish i had a dad
>>697145219
Do you honestly think going to fucking raves is a good thing?
Do not fuck Emma C, that bitch cray
>>697128864
Try harder to be with that girl, she was the best thing in your life and her leaving you led to years of depression and lonelyness
>>697159087
The only useful lessons my dad taught me were to never say your buddy's girlfriend is ugly, and that syrup mixed with peanut butter makes a cheap, filling meal in lieu of dinner.
And how to drink alone until you pass out.
>>697129245
nice, i'd love some loli action tonight
Bruce!!! Listen to me right now!!! It's Lois!!! Lois Lane!!! She's the key!!! Am I too soon??!
Drop the fuck out and do Internet school. No life that shit and go to college early.
Oh and fuck the police isnt just for niggers and criminals.
>>697158964
>implying; semicolons are awesome
This stupid movie doesn't deserve to be quoted
>>697159773
>What... is the capital of Assyria?
Don't be a dumbass and oblivious to sara i know you think she's not dropping hints at you and just acting like she's your best friend but its not you fucking idiot, trust me, she lets you stick it in the pooper.
Speaking of pooper, remember the first week you get your car and go to panda express for lunch, don't do that, or don't forget your soccer clothes. If these things happen you WILL shit yourself on the field while doing suicides. No one knows but Coach Z, thats already too many people.
Stop wearing that checkered wrist sweatband all the time. It's a step down from a fedora. Stop.
Don't shut dad out, He is still an asshole, but will give you a kick ass vinyl collection and strat.
Don't buy that one redhead chick flowers, she won't go to that spring dance with you. Also makes you look like a bitch in front of her friends, its okay though she gets pregnant a like year later lol.
Don't ever jerk off that one time before church, mom makes you talk to a priests assistant.
Thats about it, oh and your dick does not fit magnum condoms, you were putting them on wrong, but you got a indirect hand job from your girlfriend when she puts it on so eh maybe don't fix that.
Study hard and pass your classes because if you dont you end up lifting bricks for a living
>>697128864
Fuck all the bitches. Every one of them. The big ones need love too. Lick all the pussies :)
>>697159937
>mom makes you talk to a priests assistant.
>dad [...] is still an asshole
kek, I feel sorry for your youth
>you were putting them on wrong
how do you even do this?
Your dick is big.
Get better grades.
>>697144491
why not man up now?
Youth wasn't that bad, mom is crazy religious and burnt out a once cool now alcoholic dad because of it but, when they divorced I got a new car out of it so not all bad.
For the condom i just thought you layered it, my mom never allowed me sex ed, so I was clueless
>>697129245
Wew lad
To me:
> That redhead chick Jessica is insanely hot. Don't turn her down like a fucking retard just because she's not popular. She only gets hotter as she gets older, and latches onto the first retard she gets with and never let's go. Don't pass up your chance dumbass.
>>697129245
Can I bang her?
Don't get a girlfriend, fuck everyone who wants to fuck you first
>>697128864
Weed is cool no matter what any bitch says.
Fuck Taylor right in the pussy, she wants it. (hence the foot job during class you stupid fuck)
Guitar Hero will NOT make you ANY friends
Put it in neutral to rev.
>>697129245
A shitty post was made in 2016 by an autist. He posted it on /b/ while he still thought it was clever. The shitposter thought "Why am I still a virgin?" as he posted it. Now that you have read this post, you will meet the autist. In the middle of the night he will be masturbating while he cries. You will become retarded like he was retarded. If you post this, nothing will happen. Your autism will be quickly forgotten.
>>697162415
also ciggs will get you lots of pussy but you will never quit, and eventually get canser. choose wisely.
Get your fucking license asap don't slack on it, and go out with jen you fucking idiot, and get With Jordan when she told mellisa to leave you fucking pussy. Also cut down on the adderall/Xanax it's gonna bite you in the ass. Get a job it's not as bad as you think. Start Accutane early junior year. You'll be good mang
Ask Joyce out, you will regret it if you won't make a move.
Don't fuck around with Phoebe, she's a crazy bitch who cheats on you in the end.
Be there for your mom when she wants to commit suicide and everytime she falls back into depression.
Be a real brother and go do stuff with your brother until its too late and you've grown up.
Don't drink too much alcohol at your best friends party because you'll end up in the hospital.
Could say you should hit the gym earlier so you won't get the stretchmarks even though you're fit but fuck it, I'm happy were I'm now at this very moment bad choices have been made.
have more confidence in your music ability. choose it for your major and don't let others tell you otherwise.
everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
treat everyone with respect until they give you a reason to do otherwise.
there are the same variety of women out there as men. only bother with girls you can be great friends with. ones that you can be yourself around without trying to be anything at all.
get your health shit treated when you feel health shit happening.
>>697128864
Yeah i would.
Past me:
Dont bust a nut over the top of the staircase at school. The principle is talking to Mrs.Green (60 yr math teacher) and your cumnuts will get on a clipboard she was holding...
THERE IS NO OTHER WAY OFF THE TOP FLOOR ANON JUST MASTERBATE WHEN YOU GET TO THE BATHROOM OR HOME!! THIS INCIDENT RUINS YOUR LIFE!!!
I didnt know anyone else was around. Thought it would be cool to bust aheavy load over the top of the staircase but hit greens clipboard.....been forever alone since
