>be me, 16 years old
>financial situation not too good, almost got evicted
>mother worked as a janitor, father was unemployed
>one day he says he got a really nice,well-paying job at a construction site
>he actually started bringing money home
>fast forward a few years, got a nice home, even a car
>get a phone call from mom
>OP, your father got arrested for drug dealing
>mom didn't let me visit him, always said he was a bad influence
>he recently passed away
He sold drugs this whole time to keep me and mom safe, and I never even visited him. I feel so miserable, /b/.
Yes, but not much to share
he was a good man anon, he risked his life to protect his familly, you should feel proud
Fuck guys I come here everyday and I dont know who else to ask. Someone I really cared about and have known for like 1/3 of my life, since childhood, just randomly stopped talking to me. Fucking avoiding me even. Its been 6 months and I still dont know why. Everytime I open up my feelings, they just smile. Like they fucking get pleasure from my suffering. I dont know what to do. Ive tried saying Im sorry for just about everything I can think of, but no. Just the same fuckinf cheeky look.
Ive thought about getting revenge some how but I cant bring myself to hurt them physically right now. I want them to feel what I have felt. Im thinking of just living a better life than them, and just shit on them when they come cralling back. I dont know though /b/. Ive been psychologically fucked by them for so long and they dont even realise it. They dont know how bad feeling ignored hurts.
End of blog please subscribe
Long as peoples here i got a bit to share
>be me 18y.o
>Good school results and descent home
>Grateful for my parents
>Everything is fine
>Realise life is boring after and we almost do jack shit
>Try methods to get rich
>Release life gets harder when you grow up and start to believe all shit elders said...
>Now I'm a fucking lunatic no friends
>Lost almost all carrying family members
>Happy to still have a few
>Go on /b/ other fora to expand knowledge
>Releasing I need to act to take responsibility for my family
>Im to one that always take care for some en never felt that feeling for me
>Life is boring and shit
>Spend about 8 months getting girl
>Eventually get her
>She says she falls for me
>Fall for her
>Ended it suddenly a couple week ago
>Shes going away for a while so our relationship would grow she says
>Talk alot still
>Says no relations for as it would be too hard to keep them
>Shes now in a relationship with someone from here
>Feel like utter shit
Fuck it all
I complain every feels thread about the same shit yet i never feel better venting
To anyone who is having a bad day/week/month/year, I want you to know that it will get better one day. You'll get that girl you're dreaming for, that job, that car, that house. You have to believe that one day, you will rise from the dark grim of reality you're currently living in.
I want to become a youtube success, but am afraid of becoming like all of the other narcissistic assholes on that site. So I post my videos on b knowing that the other anons won't let me get too full of myself.
>This Photo Sums Up Me And My Unloving First Girlfriend After 2 Years Of Trying To Get One Im Still With Her Only Because Shes All I Got
Let it go, man. Nothing good can really come out of it. This is not the way to happiness.
Instead, focus that energy on being better yourself. Get ripped, eat healthier, study more, become more intelligent, talk to more bitches, improve your social skills.
Revenge will bring you nothing but more anger and sadness. There's still good people in this world, man. Become a good person too yourself.
That way, you'll be happy. Just hang in there.
>back in 2012
>be me, 17
>lonely Christmas, parents went to fucking France without me as I didn't really want to
>alone for the whole fucking holiday
>browsing /b/, playing games whole days
>occasionally using omegle
>meet a girl
>chating for about four hours straight
>add her on facebook
>not really 10/10 but solid 7.5/10, could have been even 8 if she really wanted
>chating almost every day for about three months or so
>even get some nudes from her
>but as the time goes, it gets slightly too much
>every day, tons of messages
>she thinks I am her personal therapist or someshit
>she keeps telling me about her problems, about all that shit I don't give a fuck about
>when I don't reply she proceeds to spam
>sometimes even 50 in an hour
>I get pretty tired of that
I mean, sure, I'd talk to her, I think I even cared about her a bit but this was way too much
>get back home from school, tired as shit, all those exams
>instantly get 20 messages
>leave me alone for Pete's sake
>tell her I am tired
>doesn't stop her
>"Hey, can I tell you something, Anon?"
>Start crying how some cunt from her school doesn't want to be her friend or someshit
>Get really pissed and lose it
>this is the last thing I sent to her
>"Now you listen to me, for fuck's sakes. I don't give a fuck about your problems, I never gave any nor I ever will. Stop fucking bothering me, find someone else who will listen to your fucking whining, bitch. If you fucking wanna send me another of your fucking messages, it better be pics of your tits or i don't fucking care, whore."
>Never heard of her again
>Found out she killed herself few weeks ago
Note to say, i don't feel any responsibility and I don't even feel bad really. And that is what wakes me up in the night. I should feel something.
>13 years old
>want to join army at 18 for god, country, and to kill muslims
>turn 18 and join army
>finish infantry school in full hard charger knights templar mode
>ship to iraq
>get to mosul ready to do my crusader thing
>on patrol and fire fight starts
>my first combat experience
>move to a house to take cover
>we breach the door and start clearing room to room
>i enter a bedroom and see a person move
>i get kind of panicky
>i put my dot on the person and fire 3 shots
>person falls to the ground
>i look up from the person and see a small child on the bed
>he screams and dives on what i now see is an unarmed old man
>the old man gurgles and stares at me as he bleeds to death
>the little boy is yelling at me, holding the old mans head and hand with tears pouring down his face
>i just stand there
>i can't even process what i had just done
>i back out of the room and we continue on with our fight
>i still see the old mans face every night
>his eyes staring straight through mine
>i still hear the little boy's screams
>only alcohol or strong medication can get me to sleep
>i don't even feel like a person anymore
To play devils advocate here there's probably a good reason said person is ignoring you.
Is there something about how you act that might detract them from wanting them to see you?
Personally you remind me of someone I once ignored because they were such a shitty person that I didn't want anything to do with them, but I was also too much of a coward/didn't want to stir up any more shit to say anything. So I simply stopped talking to them, and then they confirmed their horrid behaviors by taking revenge just as you're saying now.
Think about it. Chances are it's your fault one way or another. Maybe they've been building resentment against you for so many years they can't help but stay away or else the accumulation of it all will come flooding in and hit them harder than is worth to stay with you.
I'm sorry you're going through this. I guess my only advice is to take a good long look at yourself first before anything else. Ego is poison.
triple dubs checkened
if she offed herself just because of that msg then it seems clear to me that she was a weak willed individual that would have eventually gone there anyways regardless of your attempt to rid yourself of her.
Thanks man. They do get angry randomly like smashing a thumbdrive if it isnt working properly and then laughing about it afterwards. You think that could be a sign of BPD? Also, do you ever feel any remorse for the things you do?
Also I had to break it to you but you didnt 'win her over' after 8 months. She knew you always liked her so she hooked up with you because she needed a confidence boost. Happens to me sometimes, just gotta move on and cut them out of your life.
I just want to stress that I'm really just projecting here from my own experiences and I could be totally wrong. I don't know anything about you or the person you're describing; simply wanted to add some perspective on what might be happening.
If you genuinely haven't done anything to deserve this treatment then maybe it's all on them. Perhaps they're also struggling with depression and who knows what else, and are simply too exhausted to put in the effort to have any meaningful relationships with anyone.
Welp, at least thats relief a bit. I am trying to convince myself that it wasn't my fault but, considering that she was doing a lot better since we had started talking, I can't get rid of the feeling of guilt.
I changed medication and got a good thearpist about a year ago and since then I feel guity about things. I still block people out these days but I try to always be positive around them. Before when I was in a shitty mood I used to twist people just to see what reaction I could get. It was horrible but people can change.
>Be me 16 in sophomore year
>Family hates me for being a smart ass
>I hate my family because they don't want or have done jack shit for me
>had to buy and cook my own food
>one day meet stupid girl who doesn't know shit about algebra
>I tell her she's stupid as a rock and she gets angry
>Idk why she still stays and asks for my help when more capable people are around
>fastforward to when she asks for my bday
>tell her no one has celebrated it since I was 8
>she goes out of her way to get me a cake
>we get close
>stay friends for a while
>fastforward to 2 years earlier from now
>she stops me from joining the marines
>we actually get really close
>tells me she just wants to stay friends
>I stop talking to her for a while
>out of nowhere she tells me she wants to meet other people
>meets better looking guy
>going out now for months
>I'm still stuck at home
>fast forward to now
>lost my only good paying job
>had to move in with worthless drunk cousin on wellfare from breaking his leg
I really want to anhero but I feel as though Id prove my dead beat dad and my pretentious mom right. Worst of all I feel empty, I just want to give up so bad.
>tfw you're nostalgic for a time that wasn't even 10 years ago.
Anons whatsthe poitn of this all? of this horrible circus of shit. especially if you live in this fucking Russia, they even dont let you to fap. so many hentai sites are blocked. proxies n shit. and if you want to immigrate? there? I want to live in Good Old Germany not is some rapefugee country (Russia is doing this too their soviet way), I want to live in America not in niggerland. evil is won? is already the end?
all I see is degeneracy, stupid totalitarian regimes (in Russia even a lot of hentai sites r blocked), no hope, no light. and dying White Race, even Japanese arent that good. and no country for WHite Men. no country I would be proud to be part of.
"oh we blocked that sites, so you cant fap".
I hate you all, hate your pathetic lives, I still will fap, and I still will be a racist, and nazi all my life. stupid soviet commies. The Truth is the only way. The Thruth is painful and depressing. A Human who knows cant be happy in this world.
please Hitler come back!
> 4 years ago, 15 years old
> Never ever had a real girlfriend, just random hookups, also a virgin
> Met this girl in school that I instantly had a crush on
> We talked and became really close friends
>We'd go out daily, have fun together, laugh, long warm hugs
> I'd die for a few moments every time she hugged me tight or kissed me on my cheek
> Stayed late at night way over curfew just so I could spend more time with her
> I fell in love with her /b/
> but one day
> One day she stopped responding to my messages
> She suddenly got cold. From all those heart emojis and cute texts, to simple, short, boring chats
> I died on the inside
> She found a boyfriend /b/
She gave me hope for 4 months that there could actually be something beautiful between us, and she killed me in the end
To this day I still can't get attatched to any other girl.
I'd say 'find another girl' but I've only done that through dumb luck so can't really give advice. Make sure you laugh that shit off though. Even if you ache on the inside dont let her have the satisfaction.
There has to be a better way to do it. I feel pathetic as fuck for letting her do that to me. She knew exactly how I felt and rammed me with it. Thank you for your advice man I appreciate it alot.
Yeah the first get feels good
Just wait till your first quads or quints.
If you have the luck of the devil you might even end up like the anon above you with glorious sexts one day..
Just keep shitposting and you'll go far kid
That's YLYL for you my friend. Also nice dubs!
You can roughly calculate by checking the post numbers of a thread one week ago to get an average post rate and figure out which day will be one before and it should be around then since post speed picks up a lot close to major gets
your own fault, mate.
4 fucking months and you didn't even try to kiss her.
She was obviously waiting for you to make the first move the whole time, yet you were such a fucking wuss that you didn't do anything about it.
Nevertheless, we've all been there at one point in our lives. Learn from your mistakes. Don't do that next time.
Why not enlist in the Marines then, like you wanted to?
It'll get you out of the house, in a new area, and you'll meet a shit ton of other people.
Although it's gonna fucking suck a lot to be enlisted.
There are too many small mistakes for me to enjoy it. The script is mostly good, but the direction of the MC is fucking awful. So inconsistent,but I'm sure it's a good show if you can see past that
>that feel when my ex
>is everything i ever desire to be
>being like him is literally my end goal
>we have so much in common, and that combined with a self-image lower than the Mariana Trench, that it felt like i was copying him in everything
>he stopped our relation over the phone
>will probably see this and cringe himself to death
might've posted this the other day
am still confused about her
>meet girl online
>text for a month back n forth
>decide to meet up
>very pretty girl
>same kind of humor
>spends 3 days at my house
>we have a lot of fun, go to the movies, friends party, sex
>continue to meet up for the next 5 months
>just before christmas tells me she cant do it anymore
>gets back together with her ex
>3 months pass without any form of contact
>slowly start texting again
>i get "i've missed you in my life" messages
>some more of those kind of texts
>ask her if she'*s happy
>she says overall yes
that was about 2 months ago
during those she texted me more of those "i've missed stuff with you" texts
yesterday and the day before that we were discussing that matte because i'm fed up with having to deal with it
she told me that
>she thinks about us whenever her relationship is at some negative point
>she misses the sex we had, the feeling i gave her
told her that she was still insecure, that she was using me as a safe haven
she agreed, yet always took the chance to tell me over and over that she "made the right decision" and "just has to life with her choice"
while it's clear she's all like "no idea what i want", she still thinks about me even after 6 months
and i still don't really know why she chose her ex, instead of me, if she is still thinking about me a lot
Thank you SO much, anon, really appreciate it. On the other hand, he did help me get cuter and stuff, as he was the first femboy I had ever seen irl (not the /b/ oversexualised version, just a feminine boy)
Just a regular fucked up guy. Sure we can all relate to this scene.
Aw, you're too kind, anon~
True. Thank you for the tip, anon!
I'm home alone for another weekend. I have nothing to do but watch videos of people playing video games and playing them myself. I've gotten uses to this and I don't really mind it, except that it's starting to get a bit boring to not even have any friends online. I'm thinking about taking a shower and then taking benzo just to not be me for a while
This video always makes me cry... youtube.com/watch?v=2RqgFl2jGdI
meh, she sounds like a manipulative bitch, man.
Fuck her if that's what you want, but I don't think that it would be wise to fall in love with someone like that. Been there, done that.
There are better people around. My current gf would give her life for me, she deserves my love.
The bitch you're talking about sure doesn't deserve yours.
just finished reading... i feel broken just as much as this story. similar, why is this world so shit anons
I remember coming to these threads a couple of years ago and crying like a bitch. I thought I was so depressed and that my life was so hard. I wasn't happy though, that's the truth. Now 2 years later these threads make me cringe, but I'm in such a darker place than I was. I'm so much more lost than before.
I felt so far from home at the time and now I've forgotten where home was. I'm not saying these threads are cringe worthy because they help some deal with their emotions. But you get to a point where the things that used to help no longer do, and realising that makes you feel like you lost your self a long time ago.
>have HFA (High Functioning Autism)
>had to endure 10 years of being school for children with special needs
>literally only 5-6 out of 120+ students had HFA
>unable to develop social skills properly
>wasn't able to obtain a proper education
>Mother's abusive partners ridicule and punch me
>leave school at 16 with nothing and surprisingly get into college
>meet a pretty decent bro on the 2 second week of IT course
>form solid friendship, still friends to this day
>now able to interact like a normal human being
>1 and half years later
>get 7/10 grillfriend and lose virginity down the line
>go to mental health institute for 10 days and complete 2 more years of college
>fast forward to today
>trainee kitchen fitter
>Looked down on by others every step of the way for having autism
There are traumatic events that have popped up throughout, though they're not worth the words.
Thank you, I can't say it is the worst start or even if it is as bad as other may perceive it to be, though one can't be sure after living this life. Maybe it can harden a person, even so, a good majority of these memories are shit as can be.
i was genuinely interested in how her life is going anon
i mean, even if she doesn't want any form of contact, as a normal human being you'd be kind enough to let the other one know right?
Stop whining, you bastards. Alcohol, drugs or prostitutes is a perfect thing to enjoy to enlighten your life. Of course you are depressed if you do not enjoy life. You all try to much to make other people happy. Stop IT now, start making yourself happy.
Sometimes I wish I would just die in a freak accident so I wouldn't have to feel guilty for the sadness of my loved ones when I inevitably off myself.