ITT: We post the best greentext storries:
1/6
>>691520652
fucking gold
http://www.girlsaskguys.com/sexual-behavior/q2033371-question-for-white-guys-only
White guys comment and vote!
>>691520888
jesus
>>691520888
I feel sorry for that guy, but at least he cleared up his life and is back on track. Good on him for getting rid of that shitty "GF"
check da digits
any lurkers in here?
>>691520888
rip crabbo
Anyone got the green text about the anon that was raped by his cousin for years only to get his own back years later, it was long, made diamonds and had a picture of a sexy girl in stockings just to take up space.
>>691524382
Dont have it...
>>691523538
Post the rest of this it's beautiful
>>691523627
I couldn't understand any of this.
>>691525538
ask >>>/a/
>>691525399
i didn't know there was more
>>691525538
>fat rage cause impled lesbians aint true lesbians
>his friend start crying no clue why
>offers waifu pillow to the crying friend
>he refuses cause it aint his girl
>op rages and kicks him out
its cringe really
>>691524995
fuck you newfag. your screen shot is shit and this isn't funny. i hope you rot and die in the sewers where the rats will eat your remains
anyone know if there is more to this?
>>691523627
https://youtu.be/Fib4-S9ENpE
6:00 mark, exact anime and script until end of caps. demo is great though
>>691525935
but but but anon kun....
you think I care
legendary
>>691525829
So yuri means lesbians and he said he came here for the lesbians? Wtf. And the guy knew what that word meant? I was thinking of watching anime, but I don't want to turn into that.
>>691526559
ever been to /y/ or /e/?
i only jack to anime
>>691522201
Underrated
>>691526770
No. I rarely go on other boards.
>>691526559
yuri literally means lesbian in japanese, dakamura is the body pillow with a girl design and such
a lot of people would recommend you stuff like FullMetal alchemist and Hunter x Hunter that are classic adventure anime, can watch pretty casually
But shit derails, if you like it you look for something like it and its worse, you watch more and more and soon you are a weeb like fatty and op there
It happend to me...
>>691526311
Chek'd n' kek'd
>>691520888
touching story, never thought I'd say this about hermit crabs
>>691520915
is that really a question ?
Shotanado always good
>>691526885
shame anon. /b/ isn't a bad place but there any many other great boards. i really recommend checking out a new board a week.
>>691527087
only for fags like you. fag
>>691520888
Damn dude, that's depressing.
Sidenote: nice trips
>>691526887
I don't quite understand how a genre of tv shows can affect you so much. I watched a couple episodes of attack on titan, but I don't like subtitles and I don't like dubs.
>>691524006
Jesus christ why am I laughing so much.
>>691527126
Really? Seems like a waste of time. Went to /fit/ once to ask for advice, seems like half of them were too illiterate to understand my question.
>>691527556
Deadpool waifu
>>691527451
FUCKING KEK
>>691527574
well what other shit are you interested in? they likely have a board that fits it
>>691525286
Have the rest of this?
for the queers
>>691527798
not a greentext but a great archive
>>691527777
HOLY QUADS
>inb4 hurrrrrrrrr ifunny
i don't have it without and don't know how to edit it
>>691527411
I mean he's not wrong
>>691527282
In my case I was almost doing an hero
>depressed as fuck
>feels bad man
So a friend introduced me to anime, shit was okay, but a fuckton better then my life, so I took support of it, watched it day and night non-stop all kind of shit
Should've gone an hero
>>691528230
faggot confirmed
>>691528138
Take snipping tool and avoid the iFunny part.
>>691526813
overposted anon
>>691527777
I like the NFL and astronomy and robbing banks.
>>691524382
What the fuck
>>691528356
I hate my life too. I made a lot of mistakes, I'm very intelligent and proud but never really had any path. I just did whatever. Now I have an okay job but can't deal with the fact that others have more. My sister makes twice what I make, my closest friend is just finishing school and is already making way more than me (dentist, pulls over $100/hr), my other friend just got accepted into medicine.
One of my biggest problems is that I've always wanted to kill myself. I never put much thought or consideration into the future because I always figured I'd be dead. I'm pretty sure I'm going to finally kill myself this summer. I don't know when the best time to do it is though.
Gets me everytime
>>691529684
Post pics of yourself op.
>>691529949
Haha woops i meant anon not op.
>>691529949
I'm not OP. I'm not ugly though.
>>691529832
An unexpected turn of events.
>>691529347
yup this was the op
>>691529949
Since you asked.
I'm OP.
>>691524006
I was in this thread. actually thought about this post for some reason just yesterday, was weird.
>>691530098
Post pics then not-ugly-anon
>>691527574
maybe they were pissed because your question was already answered in the sticky, that tends to fuck them off.
what was your question?
>>691522201
lol holy shit yes
>>691530005
Here's me. Edited the picture for anonymity, so you can't see my face, but you can get the general idea.
>>691524006
Holy shit
>>691530805
The question was a bit personal and stupid, but a guy pointed me to the sticky but it was obvious that he didn't understand my question. Someone actually gave a half decent answer though.
>>691530872
So you want to kys even though you're hot, how old are you? How long ago did you finish HS?
>>691528378
youre on /b/ everyone here is a faggot, it should be us fags calling out cis people
>>691532280
fukkin saved.
No one has Lil' Cheese? That shit was ultra cash.
>>691532740
>cis
MUST BE SUMMER.
>>691532926
Post your lil cheese. We all know the only person who saved it was the creator hoping to get efame on 4chan
>>691527798
beautiful.
>>691532492
I'm not hot. I'd say I'm a little above average, maybe 6-7/10. I graduated hs in 08, graduated college in 2012. Been working for the same company ever since. Make okay money, but nothing compared to my dentist friend. I wouldn't be surprised if he makes $300K next year. If I'm still alive I'll make around $66K next year. I have lots of problems, don't want to get into. Lots of regrets. I don't do relationships well. Dated two girls who were both amazing. Couldn't make either relationship last. Stayed friends though. But it kills me thinking about how I messed everything up.
I wish I didn't under-achieve so much. I could have been anything, but I had no direction. I really didn't think I'd finish school, was sure I'd kill myself first. Now my friends are all happy, some rich, some engaged, and I'm just nothing.
>>691533574
Live in canada? Wanna fuck a cute boy?
>>691527989
severely underrated, i'm fucken dead
>>691533941
Samefag here.
>>691533574
Find new direction in your life. Get some nermit crabs if its your thing. Im much younger than you (4years) ive been sucking blizzard world of warcock for nearly a decade and i keep doing it because of the community, the friends who keep me up when i feel down.
>>691529684
>Now I have an okay job
Curious, what is it? I'm landing a average job office job this week and something tells me I'd rather go back to being a neet.
>>691534461
I can't. I need peace. I have lots of mental problems that I just can't deal with any more. I'm tired. If I won a hundred million dollars and got my ex back I'd consider living a little longer, but even then I'm sure I'd do it eventually. Thanks for the compliment (assuming you're the same poster who called me hot), but this is overdue. I never would have believed at 16 that I'd live to be 26.
>>691528230
He does look good in them
>>691534873
Software developer. I like the job itself. I like working with my head and I'm good at it. If my family and friends didn't make so much money I'd probably be pretty content with my wage.
>>691533528
I have it on an external HDD, but my new pew pewter won't read it. Shit sucks, it was so fucking good, too.
>>691527451
>sand nigger
>>691535138
Yes hot, 10/10 would ride your cock. But im a boy soo..
>>691533419
that was fucking retarded. tulpas are the most autistic thing ever
has this one been posted yet?
>>691535649
hows your first day on the internet going?
>>691535913
Careful your power level is showing
>>691535778
Haha thanks. I'm straight though so not interested. Sometimes I wish I were gay though, I think I'd have an easier time getting a man.
>>691535649
>sand nigger
You might get a sensible chuckle from "dune coon."
>>691536113
Oh thats cute, cuz its not easy unless you find some brainless slave in a trap/boy pussy thread.
Im still single, and a virgin all cuz im looking for a relationship.
If you're gonna kill yourself why not try things before you go. Its called a bucket list.
Its not something you make while you're on the bucket.
>>691536015
yes
>>691535649
>never heard the term sand nigger before
jesus christ how fucking new are you? like not even as an insult just genuinely curious coz thats some shit you see on here every day.
Is this literally your first day or what?
>>691536043
every fucking time
For those of ya who haven't read this, I recommend it. Its long, but one hell of a ride.
>>691536602
HEY HOW DO I MAKE MY TEXT GREEN?
>be me>summer is here>gonna impress everyone on the chans with my school stories>sucked my friends cock in front of the class>it was sex ed>i got so popular>said i had a good mouth>sucked everyones cock>teacher gave me straight A's>joked they were gay A's>confused.internet explorer>going to suck my friends dad cock now
>>691527451
>eat the bacon or I hit you
>eats the bacon
fucking lost it from the mental imagery
>>691527411
Gachimuchi-tier.
>>691520652
>>691520652
This is going to hurt, isn't it?
This is fucking worth the read
>>691537121
i've read it b4 anon. can't read it again. here's the last part to it
>>691538049
Thats included at the end of the 4th one already, at least for the one I got.
>>691538246
oooooh okok
>>691526125
Fapped three times to this. Good shit
>>691527451
>he eats the bacon
It had me until there.
>>691537755
Gets me evertim xD
>>691538951
do you know if there's more to it?
>>691527314
kekered
>>691525399
There's more?
>>691520652
VN is called majikoi for anyone interested
>>691526548
does the nerd who made this realize that busboys don't make the food?
>>691537121
THESE ARE NOT TEARS!!! IM LEAKING TESTOSTERONE!!!!!!!!!!!
>>691542994
Its okaaay, anon. I cried like a bitch too. Although, I am a fag, whats your excuse?
>>691528138
you can literally fucking crop on any computer made after 1990
>>691541440
what movie is this from?
>>691520888
Poor hermit crabs. I feel for that anon, god bless his soul.
>>691544420
Try eeternal sunshine?
>>691544444
>>691526125
all that sex, yet still a virgin. wtf
>>691523382
kek
>>691544803
>all that sex, yet still a virgin
>all that sex
>still a virgin
>sex
>virgin
>>691544939
bcuz no penetration. only wanks and bjs
>>691520888
poor crystal, good guy, i hope he is well
>>691545084
>ALL THAT SEX
>>691542826
oh my god I remember this.
I'm 24 and haven't completed any post-secondary and still live with my parents.
>>691536942
>>691537016
>>691537076
>>691537121
Lol
This got posted by this guy on /pol/ the next day (6/11/16)
And I thought he was the original ;-;
>>691544562
thanks man
>>691537121
fuck you /b/
>>691541302
while spooky, thats so fucking cute
not really a greentext but sorta funny
1/2
>>691523382
Underrated
>>691531498
Not the other guy but cmon. What was your question?
>>691535649
Found the newfag
>>691546954
This made me fucking sad... :(
>>691526410
Hahaha fucking gold.
>>691526239
i was hoping i wasnt the only one who noticed
>>691548814
any more sp00ks? this one is the only one i have
>>691542456
I think you're the only one here that even thought about the busboy making food
anyone took screenshots of the incest thread the other day? there was a pretty good greentext in that. didn't cap coz i was on my phone.
Something about a guy and his mom and she watching him masturbate all the time.
>>691527411
Whoa, he does look better in them.
>>691532740
Technically i'm Bi. So i'm half faggot.
>>691550089
fucken skin walker stories anon. those freak me out. i remember going on /x/ a lot and reading tons of these. still kicking myself over the fact that i only saved one of them
>>691527556
Good film
>>691546417
>greentext
>not green
>>691523681
That's funny in a seinfeld sort of way. Like I say outloud "ha, that's funny" cause it was well-thought-out, but I don't actually laugh.
>>691528138
Fuck man...
>>691537121
Fuck, man. Fuck.
>>691523435
>>691523921
I love it cause his joke wasn't funny but he went to jail to make it.
>>691530114
Oh shit, this love story make my day...
>>691524006
My moment is looking into a doorknob at my reflection. The doorknob was eye level at the time.
>>691524289
>bright red crab
>fucker has already been cooked
>>691524995
OMG KEK SO FUNNY THEY SOUND LIKE 4CHANNERS HAHAHAHA kys newfget
>>691524006
Did that with a door handle to our back door.
>>691526311
Supreme kek
>>691522201
I love it. Best one I've read in a while.
>>691551668
>sir, i'm speaking english
fucking kek
>>691554371
I want el dubs pls b0ss
>>691524289
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
>>691537121
Just
Fuck you Internet.
>>691554882
thats not greentext newfag
wincest
lets go cunts
>>691555555
>>691528601
Kek that gave me a weird boner
>>691554966
Am I a pussy for being scared by this
>>691555479
no, shits spoopy
>691555555
lets end it now
bye bye
>>691528681
Jesus Fucking Christ
>Staquafre, English Student
>Staquafre
i'm ded
>>691532740
Whoa, hold the goddamn phone.
Yes, we are all faggots, but we ain't no goddamn queers. Get that through your faggot-ass skull, nigger.
>>691537121
Fuck. Need to smoke a cigarette to get that out of my system.
>>691527451
"You don't have to call the cops, but you do have to eat this."
>>691555408
are there any more?
Bump
>>691545478
Patrick?
