Gong to commit suicide, trips will be my suicide note
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Gong to commit suicide, trips will be my suicide note
'' Whoever read this note, now is cursed, goodnight ;D ''
lol wiener
>>689045849
"This is an experiment, I am not dead. Don't bury me."
>>689046939
This guy ..
I committed suicide because I have cancer, goodbye,
P.S. FUCK ALL OF YOU
>>689045849
"If I die the blacksmith is actually Mafia."
I can not leave without Christina anymore
"my dick is too small, no reason to live"
Hey, we can get quads. GET MODE
>tfw not alive
>>689045849
"I'm an alcohol"
Simpsons did it.
Going back to a previous load out
>>689045849
"I may contain traces of nuts"
"im so sorry mom that i fucked you once in a while while you were asleep, i can promise it will never happen again now"
>>689045849
"died saving his family from a sinking battleship"
Better than killing and raping and being killed
>>689047646
roll
>>689047187
Kek
Don't do it, faggot. Life is shit and we should all kill ourselves but if you're gonna do it anyway then why not try living like you have nothing to lose and try doing whatever the fuck you want before you check out? If that doesn't work out for you, fine kill yourself, but it's not worth doing it before you've gone out with a bang and checked some stuff on the bucket list.
"I'm adopted"
>>689047781
couldn't care less about your opinion anon
it's my life
"Who turns off the ligths"
ravioli ravoli give me the formu-oli
>>689046939
Roll for this
"Please clear my history"
"We ran out of Funyuns."
>>689048003
fucking damn it. re-roll
>>689047900
Ok then your suicide note reads:
"Anon was right, I'm a massive faggot."
>>689046939
This definitely
Cya later
>>689045849
They say that all suicides have a 100% result in death
I can't go on knowing I raped all those innocent children
'I blame Reddit'
>>689045849
"that's all folks"
"my body contains a key to a safe with all my money i made from selling heroin and cocaine, i swallowed it but it perforated my intestines and is somewhere in my abdomen"
add an address that would be fitting
"I never liked The Godfather movies"
>>689048096
AND AGAIN
>333
im a faggot and i ll be ass-raped by the devil throug eternitiy
I killed myself because you were all so mean to me. I hope you can live with the guilt of knowing you were the reason i did this. Toodeloo.
"Omar m'a tuer"
"joining the evergrowing army of the undead do not cremate"
I was a faggot for my whole life
>>689045849
I have finally figured out who was phone.
There's treasure in my ass.
"this is what untreated mental illness looks like"
>>689045849
>See you in Equestria faggots.
We then watch Fox sperg about it.
"experiment 37"
or
"do not move body
explosives are highly sensitive"
"It's been real, and it's been fun, but it aint been real fun."
"Now you will never know where I burried them..."
"ayy lmao"
My planet needs me
>>689048667
>off by one
"I suck at all sports"
"So long and thanks for all the fish"
"I DID IT FOR THE LULZ
I DID IT FOR THE LULZ
I DID IT FOR THE LULZ"
>>689048776
Goddamn you faggots only need one more
>>689048876
rollin
A print out of this car
Trying to sleep do not disturb
The navy seal copypasta pls
*I like Dick*
I guess i cant fly
"Pierce Brosnan was the best 007"
>>689049090
Roll
Goodbye darkness my old friend
>>689045849
"I donate my corpse to the North American Association of Necrophiliacs."
Get prank'd
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo
>>689049217
*hello darkness my old friend
The first clue to the treasure is exactly 253 kilometers from here
>>689047603
Rolling for this
"They said hell has great memes"
"they said i could become anything
so i became an hero"
What the banana did you just fucking banana about banana, you little banana? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the banana Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on banana, and I have over 300 confirmed bananas. I am trained in banana warfare and I’m the top banana in the entire US armed bananas. You are nothing to me but just another banana. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this banana, mark my fucking bananas. You think you can get away with saying that banana to me over the banana? Think again, banana. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of bananas across the banana and banana IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the banana, banana. The banana that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your banana. You’re fucking dead, banana. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred bananas, and that’s just with my bare bananas. Not only am I extensively trained in banana combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine bananas and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable banana off the face of the banana, you little banana. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “banana” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking banana. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the banana, you goddamn banana. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in bananas. You’re fucking dead, banana.
>>689049258
*I've come to talk with you again
"I broke the dam."
>>689045849
Went to buy smokes. Be back later. Don't wait up.
Obvious trips
>>689049335
FUCK 2 numbers off
>>689049406
Reroll
Fuck me hard
>>689045849
I am so utterly useless that I decided to consult borderline retards to write this suicide note
>>689049242
reroll
>>689049443
man im so fucking unlucky 1 away from trips
>>689048322
roll
>>689049443
1 off what an almost waste
also roll for >>689046939
>>689049496
#squadgoals
>>689049242
rereroll
>>689049257
RAWL
"I killed myself because I have a small dick."
"no worries, buddhist here, gonna be reborn as a rat and finally lose my v card and have lots of sex
so long suckaaaaz"
>>689049242
rerereroll
>>689049443
1 that time. 3rd time lucky?
>>689049090
Roklll
>>689049335
reroll
I did it all for the nookie
>>689049242
rererereroll
My treasure is yours for the taking, But you'll have to find it first. I left everything I own... In One Piece.
"Only thing I regret in my life is that I didint have strength to live to see the new Ghostbusters movie. Good bye world."
>>689046939
rollll
>>689049242
rerererereroll
"adam and most of all, eve, here i cum"
>>689049668
you have to be fucking kidding me
meh
"Responding in 3... 2..."
"I like string cheese"
rolling for >>689046939
>>689049689
so you can take that cookie
I am kill
>>689049242
rererererereroll
"I'm a huge fag, but that won't stop me from taking dick in the afterlife"
A poster of this
>>689049806
and stick it up your yeah
>the driver was an alcohole
"actually died of cancer on the internet"
COD is way better than Battlefield.
>>689049795
reroll
>>689049335
Rolling again
Not dead yet
>>689049242
last reroll
but if no trips you should do this any way
I know I'm down right now but God loves me and reached out to save me
>>689049837
Tol
kys
Hitler did nothing wrong
"I am an hero"
GOODBYECRUELWORLD
kek>zozl
I'm gay
>>689049915
Sorry, OP. God hates you.
This is the
>get
>>689046939
rollo
"i just couldnt tell my loved ones about my homosexuality"
>>689049335
roll 1/3
"My ass tastes like onions."
This letter
neXT TIME YOU WILL LEARN TO MAKE A GOOD GAME, ACTIVISON
You broke up with me now you will live with this guilt forever
"tell moot he's a cuck"
>being this much of an attention seeking faggot
>>689050060
Roll
>>689049335
roll 2/3
"I actually like the new upcoming Ghost Busters movie."
Ripperoni In Pepperoni
Seacrest out
>>689046939
Roll.
Unwelcome serpent
>>689047900
Anon I have been very close to being suicidal before and the thing is right now i'm very grateful that i'm not dead and I don't want to die anymore.
If I can make it through then so can you. Don't give in to the moment. Call the suicide hotline right now and start trying to fight this so you don't die.
Have you also considered that if you kill yourself before meeting strict religious rules to get into heaven you will instead go to hell? Your death will not end any pain right now. It will create more pain for you. You will probably go to hell and suffer pain beyond your imagination for all eternity if you die now. Think about that. Think about that very carefully.
Imagine putting your hand on a stove burner and having it held down. Imagine that all over your whole body forever. No end in sight. That is less painful than hell.
>>689046939
do this one op
>>689049335
roll 3/3 gg
>>689050060
Rollllllll
"Suicide is for pussies"
"i cant live in a world where a woman becomes president of the united saints of america"
I voted for Trump
>>689050060
Very nice also roll
I love Mountain Dew a lot.
>>689050249
same goes to you too
it's my life, not yours
"women are a meme"
roll the dice
Put this into a dildo up your ass
>>689050363
Kill yourself
>>689045849
trips get
"pls let michael bay direct the movie about my life and why i killed myself over a too small black dick"
don't go in my room after i died
>>689050060
Rollllllli
I did it for the lulz
"because hillary may very well become president"
>>689050363
OP here
i'm british
Suicide is for pussies
ROL L
im not dead
"it was the other one that killed me"
I'm transsexual but I've always been too scared to admit it. Sorry you got to know that this way, I just couldn't bear it anymore. If you ever loved me, please burry me with name Anna and remember me as the woman I could never truly be. I'm sorry, goodbye, Anna xx.
A woman pushed me off this bridge.
Remove women's rights, they don't deserve any. I can't live in a world where women have rights.
All in all is all we are.
Daddy touched my peepee
>>689050646
re roll
>>689050546
This
666 get
"I couldn't go fast enough. I've failed you, Sonic"
Abandoning thread
I had a horrible god damn day. I lost custody of my fucking son and I have nothing else to live for. Was hoping to laugh at some good pictures for once.
I asked nicely for no spamming with fucking banana and that accounts for all spam.
To all who spammed, just sit there and read this.
You, yes you, are a fucking tumor. You will forever be a fucking virgin. You will never succeed. You are worthless garbage, and should kill yourself.
Abandoning thread, because you have fucking ruined 4chan.
Fucking losing my shit.
>>689046939
roll so much
"To whoever finds this: Please fuck my corpse"
>>689050683
agaiiin
This is only a test
>>689050736
pls
>>689046939
trips get
>>689050433
rollin for this
>>689050688
Roll
>>689050771
AGAIN
>>689050644
damn dubs, reroll for the same
I met a traveller from an antique land
Who said: Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. Near them, on the sand,
Half sunk, a shattered visage lies, whose frown,
And wrinkled lip, and sneer of cold command,
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them and the heart that fed.
And on the pedestal these words appear:
"My name is Ozymandias, king of kings:
Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!"
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away
>>689050765
Reroll
>>689050804
PLS
>>689050765
Again.
>>689050688
This
>>689050645
Reroll.
>>689049275
roll
>>689050646
fuck again
>>689050688
Rollllllll
>>689050645
Reroll
Benis
>>689050765
Cummon
>>689050646
again
to who ever reads this Bury me with a minon plush
>>689050644
reroll
I don't want to die
>>689050702
Reroll
fuck women
>>689050646
again pls
>>689045849
You just had to do, didn't you. Sick fucks like you ruin everything, every time, and this is no different. Well I hope you shitcunts are fucking happy, I'm dead and now I'll never have to sit through the failed abortion that is the new Tarzan reboot. Fuck this world and fuck all of you in it.
"allahu snackbar
damnit, i got carried away once again
sums up all the reasons why i'd end everything like this"
>>689050645
Rerolling
>>689050644
this pls
>>689046939
roll
>>689050688
Fuck this one last roll and im out of here no trips about today OP your faggot life will be spared
>>689046939
THIS
>>689051078
reroll
>>689048606
roll
In his image I will be reborn
>>689051222
Kill yourself
this entire thread
>>689045849
/b/ made me do it.
>>689050644
rerrrolllllll
>>689051222
winrar
>>689046939
Pls this
>>689051222
WINRAR
>>689049335
There he is. There he goes again. Look, everyone! He posted it once again! Isn’t he just the funniest guy around?! Oh my God.
I can almost see your pathetic overweight frame glowing in the dark, lit by your computer screen which is the only source of light in your room, giggling like a like girl as you once again type your little Banana thread up and fill in the captcha. Or maybe you don’t even fill in the captcha. Maybe you’re such a disgusting NEET that you actually paid for a 4chan pass, so you just choose the picture. Oh, and we all know the picture. The “epic” Banana guy, isn’t it? I imagine you little shit laughing so hard as you click it that you drop your Doritos on the floor, but it’s ok, your mother will clean it up in the morning. Oh, that’s right. Did I fail to mention? You live with your mother. You are a fat fucking fuckup, she’s probably so sick of you already. So sick of having to do everything for you all goddamn day, every day, for a grown man who spends all his time on 4chan posting about a fucking banana. Just imagine this. She had you, and then she thought you were gonna be a scientist or an astronaut or something grand, and then you became a NEET. A pathetic Bananafag NEET. She probably cries herself to sleep everyday thinking about how bad it is and how she wishes she could just disappear. She can’t even try to talk with you because all you say is “I REALLY REALLY LIKE THIS PICTURE.” You’ve become a parody of your own self. And that’s all you are. A sad little man laughing in the dark by himself as he prepares to indulge in the same old dance that he’s done a million times now. And that’s all you’ll ever be.
>>689051222
>>689051222
kek
>>689051222
cumgrats
>>689050715
At least we won't have our children taken away.
>>689051222
Gay as aids what A WASTE ANON FAGGATRON POO PUSHING CUCK
>>689051078
REROLL PLEASE
>>689051269
I'm not gonna kill myself. That's OPs job.
"and from the ashes shall rise the glorious phoenix"
>>689051222
OP Here
give me a min, i will post with timestamp
jet fuel cant melt steel beams.
>>689045849
One small step for one man. One giant splat on the asphalt.
>>689051479
where do you live?
>>689051222
This here man is a winner
>>689051479
Boi he bout to do it?
>>689051479
Why would you do it? Just leave your home and do whatever the fuck you want.
I was bullied for voting sanders. I can't live in a world where most of the population still believes their own needs are greater than those of the collective.
>>689051479
OP is a faggot
>>689045849
>>689051222
timestamp of written letter by OP
Just imagine this: you enter a bar and you then start shitting on everyone in it. And, if that's not enough, you
start to get naked and try to shove your penis on everyone's throat. What do you think is going to happen? You'll get kicked out! Will you be able to enter the bar again? No, the security will get you!
>>689051667
1 off
Hitler did nothing wrong
Jet fuel can't melt steel beams
>>689046939
Roll
Will OP deliver? Let's find out, on the next episode of "killing yourself on /b/"
>>689051667
TRIGGERED
>>689045849
" its just a prank bro"
>>689051479
OP is just a little bitch he won't do it.
>>689045849
Why you want to commit suicide? Just curious.
>>689051828
Hopefully OP will deliver
Here you go
See you in whatever there is after death anons
>>689046939
Fuck it, trying for this again.
How are you going to do it OP?
>>689051828
I bet my dubs on no.
>>689051614
yeah man, we want to confirm your delivery
or is op a faggot once more?
>>689051937
Will you do it?
>>689051937
Hey at least tell us where you live faggot
>>689045849
Be right back
>>689051937
Add link to thread for max shock value, also stream etc.
>>689051222
nice win.
That said. OP, you better be kidding.
eat me
>>689046939
Rolling.
>>689052099
The UK
why is it important?
>>689051937
>>689046939
Roll
>>689051937
Godspeed
What the fuck is wrong with your handwriting? Give me your money before you leave OP
>>689051937
we know you're british, but where exactly should we look out for the news, what day
>>689052099
probs UK cuz he tried DD/MM/YYYY
>>689047440
Roll
What the fuck is wrong with you? Do you bananafags have a fucking off switch? I don't understand how you can spend all your time on an imageboard, look at countless images and think "THAT THERE PICTURE SURE WOULD LOOK BETTER WITH A BANANA PHOTOSHOPPED OVER IT!" I know the word "autist" gets thrown around a lot here, but I think it might actually be the best word to describe you idiots. You must legitimately be on the autism spectrum. I mean that sincerely; what the FUCK does the original image even have to do with bananas? Why on earth would you associate it with a fucking banana? Did you ever get any sunlight as a child? There's just no rational explanation for why you would keep doing this. You're either a lifelong shut-in or a drooling fucking retard.
>>689052190
So we can confirm your death
>>689052190
where in the uk /b/ro
>>689052279
that's actually normal in any country exept united states
>>689051937
bye anon
>>689052277
check them dub dubs
>>689045849
Dear reader,
I really wish fluffy ponies are real.
Jennifer you're a cunt. Beer never tasted as much as success than it should be. Rapes are like ropes: used correctly you might waste your life.
I secretly had it going for granny. Also traps. I hope that you dont unhang me, i want to feed insecrs for an experiment...
>le greentext stories. Wish i could see trump win or lose.
Dad i hate you.
Sincerly
Mike
>>689051667
Reroll
>>689045849
I wish your circumstances had not resulted in you feeling this much suffering OP. I wish you were not doing this but that is your choice alone. I hope you find peace for yourself.
Benis
>>689052413
I was right anyway bro, its rare to see anyone on here but uk and us at this time IMHO
>>689051937
Bye buddy. I hope you find the peace you are looking for. Also, check 'em.
There he is. There he goes again. Look, everyone! He posted it once again! Isn’t he just the funniest guy around?! Oh my God.
I can almost see your pathetic overweight frame glowing in the dark, lit by your computer screen which is the only source of light in your room, giggling like a like girl as you once again type your little Banana thread up and fill in the captcha. Or maybe you don’t even fill in the captcha. Maybe you’re such a disgusting NEET that you actually paid for a 4chan pass, so you just choose the picture. Oh, and we all know the picture. The “epic” Banana guy, isn’t it? I imagine you little shit laughing so hard as you click it that you drop your Doritos on the floor, but it’s ok, your mother will clean it up in the morning. Oh, that’s right. Did I fail to mention? You live with your mother. You are a fat fucking fuckup, she’s probably so sick of you already. So sick of having to do everything for you all goddamn day, every day, for a grown man who spends all his time on 4chan posting about a fucking banana. Just imagine this. She had you, and then she thought you were gonna be a scientist or an astronaut or something grand, and then you became a NEET. A pathetic Bananafag NEET. She probably cries herself to sleep everyday thinking about how bad it is and how she wishes she could just disappear. She can’t even try to talk with you because all you say is “I REALLY REALLY LIKE THIS PICTURE.” You’ve become a parody of your own self. And that’s all you are. A sad little man laughing in the dark by himself as he prepares to indulge in the same old dance that he’s done a million times now. And that’s all you’ll ever be.
>>689052220
Seriously though all jokes aside. Don't do it. You're family will miss you.
>>689046939
THIS NIGGER FUCKING THIS
not gonna reveal exactly where but it's in the south of the UK
>>689045849
"I did it for feminism"
Also don't do it
Captcha was pies. Think of all the pie you'll miss out on
>>689052279
anyone who isn't an americunt writes it that way because day<month<year.
wtf is wrong with you guys?
>>689052579
I hope he does it
Dont do it op. Best way to end your life is to start living it.
>More waiting...
We need a backstory, OP.
>>689051368
>>689052395
I have never actually won a single one of these threads. Everytime I see that comically anthropomorphized banana holding his peel in a suggestive manner, likening the peel to clothes and his peel-less nature to human nudity, I bust up laughing. This happens every time, no matter where I am, be it the house or the bus or in class. Sometimes I laugh just thinking about it. This is a dark memory but a few months back I had just gotten done with a fit of laughter caused by one of these hilarious threads. Suddenly my mom walks in and she's crying. I attempted to suppress the growing urge to laugh but it was getting more difficult. Face red, tears running down her aging face, mom grabs my shoulders and says "Your father's dead."
It was at that moment that I couldn't hold back anymore. I burst into a banana-induced fit of laughter, but the horrible news drew tears to my eyes. I laughed while I cried, tears streaming down my wide open grin, memories of daddy resurfacing and being melded and combined with the naked banana.
I lost two things that night.
"No u"
>>689052605
south west?
>>689052630
We can't help or control the circumstances in which we are born into anon.
>>689052605
Is it Antarctica?
>>689052741
south east
>>689052605
holy shit tell me where in south of UK
legit I live in south of UK (Southampton btw)
>>689046939
this is the only answer
>>689052605
where exactly? come on, we cant pester you until then anyway and atter you're dead you don't care
>>689050060
roll
Is someone screenshoting in case this pans out?
Btw OP don't do it. You're not thinking long-term
>>689052579
Your* fucking fag
>>689051937
Farewell sweet prince
I habe de cancer b0ss
>>689052903
lol xD
>>689052903
of course not
death is for eternity, so it's much longer than 'long term'
>>689047929
With the typo. Roll
>>689052807
damn i would have met up with you if you were closer. for the thrills, nut maybe all you need it to talk about it... i wouldn't stop you. do things as you want
>>689052903
someone do, i am on my phone and wanking
>>689050726
roll
>>689052982
Reroll
>>689052809
find each other and fuck so OP doesn't die a virgin
>>689053000
trips never lie
>>689052605
b r i g h t o n
r
i
g
h
t
o
n
>>689053000
That should be the note . nice trips
>>689053023
dude don't wank to this thread thats gross
and challenging
so i am disgusted by u but also simulataneously respecting u for that
>>689053179
thanks my man, i am training to be able to fuck my gran next week
Before you go take a look at this
>>689053254
I lost it
>>689053316
cyanide pill? it looks fucking massive for one
>>689051937
Peace out man
>>689045849
This is what I'll use
>>689053316
are you the one that stole my nose back then?
>>689053410
Its a fucking tampon you dipshit
I'll cap this guys... anyone know of a way to do it easily with firefox?
>>689052809
Same here dude SO18 reporting in
>>689052605
why city
TELL ME I'M FROM THE SOUTH OF THE UK I'M FROM SOUTHAMPTON
>>689053616
>>689052809
SO15 here mush
>>689053317
yeah i lost my boner, too, b/c of typing so much
really takes an effort to maintain a boner like this
>>689053483
God no...the pain will be worse than anything you can imagine
>>689053547
already doing it via screenshit m80
>>689053483
If this is op make sure you have a quick long drop to sever the neck instead of being choked slowly. But don't do it oc
>>689053616
>>689053660
what the fuck... there's localfags on here???
SO16 btw dudes
>>689053696
thats what viagra is for
>2016
>still falling for this shit
