how to find a woman in her 30s/40s to fuck and call mommy?
damn, if I could find a woman like that, I'd fuck her every day, multiple times a day
if u got more pls add
>>685678647
honestly I want my parents to hear their 18 year old son fucking a 30 something year old woman in his is own bedroom
>>685679311
What about those that can't do it at home?
>>685679674
what do you mean
>>685679769
A younger man may not be so bold to do it like the way>>685679311 fantasizes without being caught or embarassed.
milf fuck friend, that is my dream
>>685679068
Of the woman in OP or other milfs?
>>685678166
>and call mommy?
Why would you want to call your mommy?
Do you get scared?
>>685680640
I think the OP wants to find a woman other than himself and call them that as a fetish.
>>685680640
>>685680996
An older, attractive woman of that kind, anyway.
>>685680996
>>685681147
I want a woman old enough to be my mom
I could call her mom and spoon with her in bed while fondling her tits
i want to feel like a curious child again
>>685681427
Can't you hire somebody to do that for you? You want her to act as a stepmom to you or something more than that?
>>685681912
well, yes but I want a relationship, I want to love somebody
I actually was able to find one on craigslist. Just advertise for older ugly chicks. Most of these housewives think they are ugly because their husband doesnt fuck them.
>>685682045
Are you the OP? If so, answer>>685680476 if you asked that.
... bump for potential... and now I'm 21, so does anyone know how to pick up at a cougar bar?
>>685682155
or maybe I'll just take the word attractive out
tell us your story pls
>>685682291
I don't have any others
>>685682354
does anybody know of any cougar bars in london for that matter? all we've got are shitty pubs full of drunk hooligans afaik
>>685678166
>how to find a woman in her 30s/40s to fuck and call mommy?
THE TEN STEPS TO BANGING A MILF BY ANON
Step one: wear tight jeans that show off dem buns
Step two: go out to some sleezy bar on a friday or saturday night
Step three: talk to the milfs hanging around and buy them some drinks
Step four: get really close to her possibly kissing her and laying all over each other at the bar
Step five: "Great idea lets go back to your place"
Step six: "You ready for a spanking mommy(or whatever stupid shit you get off saying)"
Step seven: bang your balls off her asshole while pounder her pussy like a butcher tenderizing steaks
Step eight: shes still sleeping. look at her one last time and give her a kiss
Step nine: she rolls over and you have one last moment to think the night over
Step ten: bounce nigga
>>685682045
I understand, my fantasy is that, although it has nothing to do with my real mother, but I tried with mature ladies, I talk to them I wanted to call mom. and they can not, then tell me not to and I clarify them to be my aunt? or my stepmommy¡ and the answer is yes. it´s clearly...mommy is best but very hard !
>>685683467
just being with an older woman is enough for me really, I want to be kissed and called honey by a sexy older woman
Milf pussy is the best pussy
>>685683939
Fair enough
you guys are a buncha nerds
>>685680406
what would be anymore embarrassing about getting caught by your parents balls deep in a woman older than yourself as opposed to the current embarrassment they feel for their monitor tanned pale ass shut-in of a son?
>>685686286
nigger
>>685686677
this, sadly
Go up to some woman and ask her if she can buy you some bionicles
>>685687217
wot
>>685678166
mmmmm that pwussy
>>685687462
it ll activate her motherly instinct you faggot also she ll know youre a sex machine cause you like bionicles
>>685686677
It would actually be considered an improvement?
>>685687635
this brings out my autism
>>685687707
a huge one.
>>685678166
literally any bar on a saturday night
>>685688058
they don't have "bars" here, only pubs full of skanks and drunk hooligans :/
>>685687909
If you were in the life and in the same shoes of your aforementioned shut-in and had the opportunity to be in the company of a beautiful, attractive and intelligent older woman compared to being alone for most of your time previously, would it be worth it to take the risk and would you take it?
>>685689096
yes
I'm madly in love with my chemistry teacher she's A+ sadly married with two kids
>>685690183
How about right now? Before answering that, how would they attract and seduce each other?
>>685683973
dude. she is only FAT
>>685687217
best comment ever, was fapping and i stop because of the laughing
>>685690229
What attracts you to her? How does she look?
>>685690229
Got any pics?
>>685691590
Ditto
work at wal-mart. the trick is to hang around dry food aisles and wait for older women and cougars that come by for groceries... more often than not they dress like sluts and are just desperate for attention
>>685692389
>>685692395
What does that mean?
>how to i find <insert description> type of woman?
the answer is always money
Wal-Mart is great for picking up older women.. lots of new summer dresses, shorts and tank tops in the womens clothing section.. hang around "bump" into a milf and pick her up... compliment her clothing, ask grocery questions, creampie.
how can I improve my craigslist ad?
>>685689096
>Intelligent
>Woman
Pick one, and ONLY one.
>>685678166
Just rape your mom, why does everything on /b/ have to be so convoluted?
>>685693129
By insinuating sex instead of coming across as a 11 year old who's too scared of girls his age and seeks advice from actual moms because he's a tard.
Just make it clear that you're young and not imnpotent, that should do it.
>>685678166
You gonna have to kill yourself
I dont have any pics of her
>>685693599
yeah, I tried that, never got any responses that way, I'll fix it up, hold on
Bars are shit for picking up cougars/milfs, at least if you want someone that doesn't have a high chance of being riddled with disease.
Grocery stores have already been mentioned, but I'd also suggest parks. Go work out in a nicer public park if it's available. Not only will it get you in better shape (which older women appreciate in a younger man) but it'll give you something to do while being noticed and not seem like a creep.
what should I put instead what's highlighted?
Backpages. Google "escort" and your city...
>>685694855
be straightforward, don't be creepy, and once you hit it right, they'll eventually start texting you pics telling you they want more(like pic shown here)
>>685695243
More
>>685694855
The problem is the ''no roleplay, just be my second mum''
Half of those women on craigslist already have kids, why the fuck would they want to care for a pervert who isn't even insinuating buttsecks?
Say that you're looking for a naughty mature woman to experiment with, and that your dick is 8 feet long.
Moar pls
>>685678166
Craigslist
ok what write
help pls
>>685687217
Top fucking kek!
>>685695872
I'll write something up for ya.
Also, just found this, kek
>>685695872
''Young healthy white guy, looking for a nice mature woman to romance, and make each-other's fantasies come true.
Always in the mood for fun but just hanging out is cool too.''
Because you have to ease into it, no woman is going to reply to ''PLS FUCK ME WHILE I CALL U MOMMY CUZ I HAVE EMOTIONAL PROBLEMS''
>>685678166
Anyone have milf webms?
>>685687635
Can this just be a milf porn thread already?
>>685696774
alright, sounds good, I'll make a few adjustments using yours as a template
>>685697075
post result
>>685697201
should I include "mother figure"?
34 yo. Milf sucking balls and licking dick atm without me even having asked. No pic bc dark and I can't a just file. Jealoussss
>>685692559
how long does this take? I've been hanging out in the dry food aisle for about two hours and one of the employees keeps walking past and looking at me funny
>>685697298
No, that's too creepy. Ease into that shit, m8.
We mingr be /b/tards, but in the real world, that's fucked up.
>>685696137
holy shit, why are the best women disgusting men ?
>>685697623
suggest a title for me pls
>>685697536
>looking at me funny
That's because they either think you're gonna rob them/steal shit with some other guys, or that you're actually retarded.
>>685678166
Tinder. You will receive no replies on Craigslist.
>>685697730
''Youthful stud looking for naughty mature woman''
or some shit
>>685698193
what about just "mature woman"?
>>685698065
Anon is right. Tinder will help as long as you set the age group the way you want it. It's less serial killer than craigslist.
>>685697624
You ask an interesting question, and the answer (I'm going to over simplify and not get into the psychology) is that many men who become CDs, do so, because they're trying to fill the void of the woman/slut they never found. They become the perfect woman (by their definition).
Found one on a dating site who had a son in his mid 25s. Was a pretty good fuck.
Just gotta get your game on, most women are degenerate filth and will hop all over that.
>>685698357
You just made crossdressing even creepier.
Fucking hell, these craigslist wimmin
>>685693129
it's fucking scary to read the mom thing
just put an add for sex that's it, call her mommy during sex, you're done
>>685698327
Post your ad dude, i need to see it to offer help
>>685699628
one moment
>>685699628
>>685699695
Feels like I should add a little more, perhaps about myself?
>>685700003
Maybe
>>685700003
That you can't write down a fucking thing without someone else telling you what to write?
>>685700929
>>685700944
What if I added:
>I want to be your young man, can you make that happen?
The omega woman, I found her
favorite this post take a leap... (Penna) hide this posting
age: 48
of faith...
The ad:
You are now entering the Twilight Zone. I am a single female from
Penna. Your life could change. And mine...and isn't that why you are reading these?
Ok, 200 of you are bored already and should step away. W'll wait
while you quietly hit Back and go on with your life. All the best to
ya. Hope you find Her.
Now, those of us left here, still reading? Good, that's what I want,
intelligent, sane, able to put three sentences together and look over
the horizon at what could be coming your way.
I am aware that anything that comes off Craigslist must be scrubbed
raw and allowed to heal. At the end, if you are still reading along with me,
we, who have started an exceptional friendship with this ad, meet for real and see how that goes, maybe go for Dim sum, or some great time. And if we hit it off, our hair
flowing wildly behind us as the music plays, because we are mutually amazed at what
each the other brings to the whole experience. Us.
Ok, a few more of you, serial killers, kings of big countries, Brits
who are cheering the oil debacle, step away. Nobody's talking to you.
Again, thanks for readng on. Obviously I haven't offended you YET.
Obviously your mother raised you to imagine good times ahead and how
you could be going places with the most alive (alivliest?) woman you'll ever...ever.
as you are singing Psycho Killer with a keyboard player, a ukulele, bagpipe and 5-string banjo at 4:39 AM to celebrate the pending nuptials of our impending friendship, we join hands and stroll unabasedly around until dawn. We, who are just getting started .
I'm talking about fun, in case you missed it or didn't want to assume.
ONCE AGAIN, if I'm movin' too slow for ya, step away from this ad, go tell your mother she
wants-ya and then...go...click the next ad.
>>685701225
That may make some of those attractive, mature ladies who need some vigor in their lives and see this ad perk up and reply to you, so yeah.
ok r8, i need to go to bed soon
>>685702681
forgot pic
>>685678166
Plenty of fish
