Fleshlight thread? Post yours and others rate.
I'll start.
here's another pic
>>682029110
that looks nasty af, here watch my vid be warned though...
>it is bad
>i feel bad
>i am just posting it in threads so someone will give me attention
https://youtu.be/G0YeSNUX-RY
>>682029686
Jesus Christ you're a faggot anon
>>682029686
gtfo of my thread faggot
>>682030262
I know right, I gotta start somewhere
>>682030408
roger dodger
>>682029110
>>682029685
timestamp
>>682030508
u even name ur image macros. ffs. i cant tell you to kill yourself because id be legally responsible if u actually did. so go off into the woods and marinate in your own faggotry alone so the main populace doesnt catch the gay
>>682030792
>>682030902
hold up, you think it is gay to name your images? wtf is wrong with you, it takes 2 seconds when you save them lazy fuck...
>read the filename
>>682029686
This is a new brand of autism
Who the fuck admits they browse 4chan let alone makes cringy ass videos about Trump shitposts and dubs
Fucking hell mate get some help
Got a nice little fake pussy and ass for £20 cause fapping meh and I need something to fuck. 10/10 would recommend, will post pictures shortly. X
>>682031300
checked
also op how long have you had that it looks to fucking worn
>>682031371
the one who wants the edgy 12 year olds to watch his vids...
>I don't have integrity
>>682030757
r8?
>>682031610
couple years.
>>682029686
This isnt a cringe thread anon
>>682029110
that made my penis retract inside my body.
>>682032638
10/10 would hide in sock drawer
>>682029110
looks like you pulled it out from a dumpster.
Best thing ever X
>>682032956
wtf is that?
>>682032638
>>682029686
Wow anon I actually really liked that video. I don't know what all these guys are
JUST FUCKING KIDDING BITCH YOU ARE A LITTLE FAGGOT KILL YOURSELF I HOPE YOU FUCKING DIE MATE CHECK MY FUCKING BUDS BITCH
Fake pussy and ass bruh, excellent when combined with porn.
>>682030757
Jesus fucking christ this made me laugh so hard. It's fucking genius, but stupid at the same time.
>>682031700
ever thought about cleaning it?
Pipedream extreme fuck me silly. You can get them in all sorts of ridiculous sizes X
https://www.pipedreamproducts.com/showdetail?Full_Number=RD176
>>682033352
wtf dude the oil is going to ruin your fleshlight.
>>682033460
dude that's so small. How the fuck do you even fit in that?
>>682031700
Congratulations OP. Your really tore that pussy up.
>>682033695
i do clean it
actually ordered another yesterday
ariel lotus on the left, stoya destroya on the right
i've ordered 4 so far, but I threw one out when I moved because I was a huge faggot that was afraid people helping me move might see it.
>>682029686
You're a fucking loser dude holy SHIT
>>682033952
It's an anon on 4chan. it's probably like a hotdog down a hallway to him.
>>682029110
Do you have some kind of AIDS fleshlight fetish?
>>682034109
LOL, fuck, I feel sorry for him.
>>682033952
It stretches to all holy hell. Plus my camera is cancer cause its cracked its bigger than you think. For $27 or whatever I'm pleased. X
>>682034163
yeah.
>>682030757
Protips:
>HOT WATER IN THE SPONGES
>LOTS OF LUBE
>>682030757
>>682033559
IF IT LOOKS STUPID BUT IT WORKS, IT AINT STUPID
IVE GOT THE SAME ONE AND IT WORKS WONDERS
>>682029685
>>682029110
looks like you could catch a couple STD's from that nasty fuckin thing
>>682030757
Thank you, anon
>>682029110
Don't have a picture of your mom at the moment
>>682034602
i'm clean, so probably not.
Where can I order one for cheap?
Not a knock off.
>>682034783
Tenga
>>682034763
That fleshlight really indicates otherwise.
I really can't stress that enough
>>682029110
What's her name?
>>682034783
honestly, if you wanna go cheap, just use lube.
I like ultragel (pic related), because it's water based and it doesn't leave everything as shitty as petroleum based lubes. you still gotta wash if off when you're done though.
>>682034763
yeah you've probly created some new STD from not washing that gross ass fuck tube
>>682034883
Nah I want legit fleshlight brand.
I like them because of how they look and feel. I've had 2 before and usually buy off Amazon but on there and on Fleshlight website they're $70+ so any where I can get them cheaper?
>>682035060
I want a real fleshlight.
>>682029686
jesus christ the amount of autism... i j-just can't'
>>682035198
then don't go cheap imo. I think they're worth the cost; sleeves are only $50
>>682035358
I was wondering if anyone here got there's from an online sex store that sells them cheap
>>682031300
How does silicon bruise
>>682029110
If you ever want to get to get closest to how a real pussy feels, wrap a banana with duct tape and put it in the microwave for ~30 seconds. Take it out, and press on it so all the insides come out from the endings. Congratulations, you now have a hot, wet, slimy, tight pussy.
The ends are quite small so stick your dick in when you're still soft.
>>682029110
That's filthy you sick fuck. You're supposed to keep it clean, faggot. Buy a new one ya cheap fuck.
>>682029686
Post your background, I can see the sliver of animu
>>682033352
>that blackbeard figurine
Topkek
>>682035662
that second half of the instruction made no fucking sense at all...
>>682031300
Zero Tolerance makes a product called "Masturbator and Toy Cleansing Sanitizer" /b/ro you need to clean your shit before it infects your dick. Go buy some faggot
>>682029686
Fucking cringe worthy
try it, the measurements are wrong but will work with enough dumb luck
>>682035662
>>682035662
this is how you get long term bacterial infection
organic material will travel down penile shaft and get stuck, it will rot and you will suffer.
>>682035038
sugarlips
>>682036804
I did it over 300 times as a teen, nothing ever happened
>>682036732
How long does it last? One use?
>>682036929
if you do it right it'll last maybe a month, you're basically making a synthetic rubber
>>682033993
Which one feels better? Has better suction? Is tighter?
>>682037153
Fuck yes
>>682037239
Destroya is my favorite because the insides are fucking heavenly. tweaking the suction can make it more or less intense. I think Ariel is tighter, but because of the dimensions of the opening and the fact there are less ridges and stuff on the inside, it gobbles down lube.
I've also had a pink lady wave, and in order of preference it's
Destroya
Wave
Lotus
The one I ordered was a heavenly, so I'll see how that is.
>>682037239
On these suction just depends how tight you have the smaller end on. If you put your dick in with the little cap off, then put the cap on tight your dick will barely come out.
>>682037536
Holy shit man
I bought a basic one and it came with a free anus-in-a-beer-can thing.
The full-size fleshlight is barely textured inside. Doesn't feel very good at all and I haven't used it after the first time. The beer can butt, though? My god, it's fantastic. Super tight with all kinds of ridges and nubs in there.
jesus all these beta faggots cant get pussy resulting to fleshlights, get a fucking girlfriend or at least a fucking fuck buddy, its not that hard.
>>682037648
if I could make one more recommendation, either get a pink lady with the inside you want, or tend towards vaginas like Stoyas (decent amount of labias) because otherwise it might not be a tight seal
>>682037999
Wasted trips in a retard comment.
>beta faggots
>>682037999
Trust me bud, it's hard when you're an ugly 5'4" spic living in a white town.
>>682037536
You ordered a 4th one?
>>682037999
lol, please teach me your alpha ways
>inb4 "just have confidence bro!"
>>682036262
you can see it for a second in the vid
>>682029110
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oj9V8VAmwOc
>>682038227
yeah, I've never tried the butt orifice and I wanted to try something that might compete with the destroya
Any recommendations for lube? I'm out and am too lazy to order just yet. So like would lotion or similar work?
>>682029110
Is that the "Crack-whore" model?
>>682038527
>>682035060
I recommend this specifically for fleshlights; I've used mine dozens of times and the material's doing great, see >>682033993
I wouldn't recommend substituting anything in place of lube, it could degrade the material
>>682038263
tinder
>>682037245
dont do it, it makes mustard gas
>>682038185
no its not, trust me im asian ive seen smaller guys than you getting laid
>>682038740
holy fuck i literally never thought of that! WOW! let me throw out my fleshlights and just pick up some chick on tinder? do you think two is enough, or should I get three or four incase one is crazy? I've heard never stick your dick in crazy, so I wanna make sure I get at least one non-crazy vagina.
>>682038129
dumbass wont listen to reason, very well go fuck your fleshlight and while you're at it go fucking think about your life how pathetic you look like
>>682038106
Dude you must be lonely af
>>682038956
do you even know how to talk you girls? jesus christ you do have a mother right?
>>682037999
but small dick
>>682038451
Which pornstars ass did you go with?
>>682036732
Tries this at least 6 times. Either made a useless cup of jello-like hot mush or a brittle cornstarchy lump of drywall mud. And depending on the glass, it can take hours or days to cool down and harden.
Notice how no one has ever made a reply to this image with a finished product. It's because it doesn't work. It should, but it doesn't. And I would litterally buy someone the current humble bundle if they show me a picture of them making a successful one.
>>682038780
no thats the "make cool crystals at home" one
>>682036732
This shit doesnt work
>>682039191
small or not its how you use it
>>682039103
I mean, a girlfriend would be nice but my standards don't match what I've got to offer, so I'm fine with the status quo
>>682039142
I don't know how to socialize well at all, hit the nail on the head. Every interaction I have, male or female, is sterile and I actively keep everyone at a distance.
>>682039205
I got the standard butt, I don't care about pretending to fuck a pornstar and the regular ones are cheaper.
I did consider getting the ice one, because that interior looks like it'd feel good and it would be cool to see the inside.
>>682039231
>>682039363
How depressing must your lives be if you actually atempt to make a homemade fleshlight
>>682029686
That's some HQ bait man. If not, kill yourself
>>682039457
well unless you can figure that out your gonna cum to fleshlights man
>>682039539
close to suicide
>>682039539
About as depressing as someone looking through a fleshlight thread and judging others about them.
>>682033460
If your dick is smaller than the average pinky
>>682039539
whats more depressing is that using fleshlights than actual pussy
Am I the only one that likes the plain hole one?
A disembodied pussy/asshole kinda freaks me out.
Newfag Here
Was is the best Fleshlight you can buy?
>>682039714
who the fuck cares? I don't base my self worth based on whether or not I have someone at home that is willing to fuck me. I have hobbies, interests, skills, and every day I try to make myself better than the day before so why do I need someone who I won't even be happy with accept a couple humps once a week?
But hey, I can see where you're coming from if your self worth is based on whether or not you can "get pussy"
>>682033015
Pencil holder
>>682040173
like I said earlier in the thread, the Destroya so far is my favorite, but I like the wave and that one is pretty cheap.
never tried other brands though.
>>682040073
it looks like your fucking a bellybutton
>>682040315
lol
>>682040201
>self improvement
>/b/
>>682029110
>>682029685
>>682031300
dude it looks like you have been abusive to you flesh light dont be mean to the only hole that loves you
>>682040073
I enjoy that one as well. Looks like a twinks bum.
>>682040201
getting pussy takes time, dont expect that every girl you talk they want to have sex with you right away, slowly move up to the topic then if you see if the windows open you fucking jump in there and give her the best 40mins of her life until you come and poop and go to sleep
>>682040759
I just thought of it as a strange weird slimehole that I put my dick in but yeah I guess there's that.
>>682040201
>>682039191
nice trips
>>682040201
.
>>682040785
spoken like a true virgin. ahhh, how refreshing.
>>682041160
>>682041253
the image macros, they hurt my pride. please, no more.
>>682041490
>>682040313
>Destroya
http://www.amazon.com/Fleshlight-Stoya-Destroya-Realistic-Masturbator/dp/B006BV60CY?SubscriptionId=AKIAJ7T5BOVUVRD2EFYQ&tag=camelproducts-20&linkCode=xm2&camp=2025&creative=165953&creativeASIN=B006BV60CY
Just need to wait for the price to drop. Thanks
>>682036804
that's why, like real sex, you piss afterwards. Are you stupid?
*Fang banger experience : Take a few zip ties and strap your fleshlight to a saws all (I recommend A blade that has been taken to a grinding wheel to remove all teeth, or not if your a edgy faggot) its like getting fucked by one of those turbo vampire whores in true blood.
>>682041753
camelcamelcamel, set up a price alert :)
>>682041759
Unless you don't wanna get her pregnant. Then you pull it out and pee on her leg.
>>682037999
I get laid 3-4 times a week and I still yank it 5-8 times a week.
>you're putting up pleb #'s.
>>682040429
http://www.xvideos.com/video8187115/vid_20140608_244140_828
Found the video.
>>682040084
that's fucking disgusting. Get a new sock, you ginger fuck.
>>682041490
the whole 40min poop thing is a joke, i was implying it to him because he's a virgin
>>682042037
he is me (the destroya guy), and surprisingly I'm not a virgin. I was even married once.
>>682041865
If I don;'t want her to preg up, it's not pee that goes on her leg, you virgin.
>>682029686
It's not like any of you cunts had to actually watch the shitty video, it is capped in the embed script.
>>682042219
also, pee doesn't go on her leg, it goes on her tits, her face, and in her mouth and ass.
Learn to kink.
>>682042184
>I was married once
you mean in prison?
>>682029110
>>682029685
mold and mildew, chuck the fucking thing and buy a new one, be sure to wash it in high sulfide soaps.
Are there any femanons lurking?
>>682030757
>>68203090
Fuck
>>682042503
hey cock monster ;)
>>682031300
looks like you made your own fleshlight out of a pig's ear. this is like some kind of redneck DIY fleshlight.
>>682030757
>not using the scrubber side
>>682030757
DONT TRY THIS!
CREATES MUSTARD GAS!!!!!
>>682033352
where did you get a 4chan starter kit?
>>682029686
This is the gayest thing I have ever wasted my life on, I honestly heard womens cunts shrivling up as you spoke
>>682042660
I'm a girl. That's why I asked.
Slut.
>>682031614
you're pretty much inviting them all to come here and spread their cancer
>>682043142
im actually muslim and believe you should where the burka, pretty please do it for me or else my men will come and eat your asshole without permission.
>>682042219
That reference went way the fuck over your head didnt it anon?
>>682041901
That's just fucked
>>682032956
i have that same one bro wtf nzfag
>>682040785
Not that guy, but maybe some people just want to get off without the baggage of crazy broads. even if were just friends, she could get pregnant. she could have a disease, she could get emotional. this flashlight gets rid of the urge and no bullshit. I throw that bitch in the closet. I don't want kids. the world is full of idiots and pretty full. I'll be fine not producing.
>>682043424
>I don't want kids. the world is full of idiots and pretty full. I'll be fine not producing.
I am that guy and I agree 100%
>>682032638
Made me cringe
>>682029686
>>682029110
Best fleshlight ever posted on this website
>>682033372
Kek
>>682033831
>Out of stock
>>682040429
>>682043904
these two are from the same thread. That was a damn good night.
>>682043424
well yeah i agree with you with that one
>>682033831
>out of sock
>>682035545
fucking kek
>>682035545
mold
>>682037536
Heavenly is definitely a favorite of mine.
my man
>>682039231
I made one before actually. used 1 cup cornstarch to 2 cups water. Heated in microwave on high 2 mins then took it out and dug a little hold and then put it for another min. After it was done I stuck something in it to make the hole and left it in while I stuck it in the freezer to firm up. It works and feels almost like a fleshlight but if you try to take it out of the container it falls apart bad.
>>682044955
Did you take it out of the container? Or just used it in the cup? Was it soft and spongy?
>>682045189
I had to leave it in the container. It was a pretty heavy tall hot chocolate mug with a handle. The 2nd I was finished and tried to get it out, it just fell apart. More like a one time use thing IMO. Like I said, it felt like a more firm fleshlight. It's worth trying once if you are really tired of your hand but other than that I would just get the real thing.
>>682043142
Tits and Timestamp or GTFO.
>>682031342
He's right :^)
>>682032638
what kind of needle dick would fit in a toilet paper tube? Sad on so many levels ...
>>682045524
It's 2016.
Come up with a better saying faggot.
>>682046086
he will after we see some tits and timestamp
>>682046345
What, can't score a real girl?
>>682046807
yes, that's true.
but outing yourself as a girl 4chan is an attempt at attention, and only one we allow when the proper payment has been paid.
>>682046986
Post your rotting fleshlights so I can continue lurking faggot
Dick or gtfo
>>682047249
I'll post mine if you post yours
>>682047249
>>682033993
sorry they're not rotting?
the left one is dusty though, so yeah, I'm absolutely disgusting
>>682029686
You sound like an insufferable cunt. No need to kill yourself, someone else will kill u
>>682047249
LOOK AT MY MICROPENIS IN AWE!!!
>>682048009
You're posting 6 months in the future?
>>682048009
>>682048199
OH SHI-
>>682048199
GOD DAMNIT!!! sorry I am dyslexic and messed up the date and month,
>>682048708
How do you even mess up that bad.
>>682048846
dyslexia really sucks....
>>682047249
I posted mine, it is now your turn
>>682029110
My best friend used once one of this... he wanted to experience new shit, now he has 2 inches less of his dick.... no the actuall pic but this was the root of evil in my friends brain...
Sleep egger you horny bastard
>>682049273
what
>>682039231
There is a guy that did the finished project before it looks like shit and smelt weird according to that anon i used to have a pic of the thread but i lost it try looking for it the screenshot
>>682048009
>>682048708
It looks like its 4 inches. I know thats below average but its not micro penis.
>>682033993
Did the one on the right accuse you of raping it?
>>682050814
lol I get that reference. she is my favorite porn star, and it turns out her vagina makes the best fleshlight. some days I do feel like james deen though, 0 foreplay ;)
>>682050556
I know that, I was completely flaccid and intentionally made it look smaller with my bush. I'm not gonna post a good picture of my dick on this website, it's not as fun.
>>682030757
I dub it "the post-op pepe"
>tfw I can't keep a flesh light for more than a month or so, they literally begin ripping in half
>>682033352
funny cunt
>>682035060
I work in a porn shop, will tell you that KY is shit. Best water based lubricant for silicone toys is System JO. Goes on like silicone lube, comes off like water based. That or sliquid, maybe Pjur too. I always fuck up the spelling but its like Pjur or Pjure or just plain Pure.
>>682037999
You might say the same about women and dildos. Look at the industry revolving around that shit.
>>682052371
I'll think about looking into it, but I've tried a few and this was the best, but it was only just the shit you get at the supermarket
>Fucking a boring human pussy instead of glorious dragon
>>682043330
Tits or gtfo
Only vapid women watch supernatural, so you know the rules.
Are the ones bad dragon makes any good?
Thinking about the horse one right now.
>>682036732
Can u teach me how to make crystals too?
I have one of these. it hurts without a lot of lube.
https://youtu.be/oEfhUJvn5rM
Subscribe for more
>>682053118
Wtf is even that?
>>682052859
autism/10
>>682052859
why fuck that, just fuck my mouth instead
your cock is glorious
>>682053156
That is the most unfunny video I have ever watched.
>>682052859
My man!
>>682036732
Everyone wondering about this, google Oobleck. No, I don't know how that pic was made, but I suspect trickery. Good news is, it's just cornstarch and water, so you aren't gonna kill anyone.
>>682053477
it's an onahole. it's like a fleshlight, but japanese.
basicallly it's like fucking a robot. which can feel better than fucking a person.
>>682053604
You're not a dragon though.
Want to see a video?
waste of money imo. not worth the trouble of clean up.
>>682049273
if he could get it in, he didn't lose out on much.
>>682040785
I went through a period in my early 40's where I just said fuck it. Started doing escorts, going to massage parlors, and fucking strippers in the VIP. Playing the game just wasn't worth the red tape anymore.
mine! a cheap one
>>682029110
Behold my sextoy collection.
can post more pics if any anons would like....
got a 300$ realistic 20lbs ass and an automatic blowjob machine !
>>682029110
>>682054535
am interested in a video of you fucking the ass toy
>>682054037
yeah, post it!
>>682054535
Why are those called blowjob machines? They are just suction pumps right?
>>682054985
enjoy
https://videos.toypics.net/view/4974/fucking-my-dragoness/
>>682042711
i actually thought that it was a pigs vagoo or an ear too. lol
>>682053888
its a robot? link?
>>682029686
I feel sad for you just watching this
>>682054485
That's some survival/mcguyver shit. Is the olive oil to make it smell italian?
>>682055184
nah dude this one legit has a motor and fuckin sucks ur dick !
> its amazing !
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GSYSgZByPF4
only cost me 80$...... LOL
>>682054882
dont have one. might make one some day anon
>>682040201
Homie,
All you gotta say is you don't want to deal with the drama.
I've had girlfriends, but at the moment I just don't want to go through the intimacy; I don't have any of these toys but I just wanted to say you're chill
>>682045897
>believing something written in a women's advice column years ago
Kek. It was literally the opinion of one whore.
>>682055345
noice
>>682052721
I feel ya. Most time supermarket lubes are pretty bad lol. Just my opinion, but give it a try
>>682054037
bad dragon brothers
i got this one. can't take a photo rn tho
>>682056154
I'm gonna throw my hat in the ring here.
I was married, I have a kid, I've been in toxic LTRs. I'm done for now. I'm gonna look out for myself and do all the cool shit women whine about.
>why do you need so many computers?
>we could use that room for a nursery
>why do you need an old muscle car anon, whats wrong with the SUV?
>why do you keep so much junk in the basement? It's worthless!
>why don't we go out with friends anymore?
>why are you always at work, I need attention
etc... Fuck them. I'm gonna rock my shit and fuck everything that moves (and kick them out BEFORE they fall asleep) until literal 100/10 perfection crosses my path, then I will think about letting her sink her teeth in.
>>682052859
janine a best
>>682058227
>there are many doors in life, Ed Boy
>>682058227
>screenshot
>>682045897
most male penis are small enough to fit inside a toilet paper roll, rare is it that a man would be too large. The average penis is 5-6 inches in circumference which is much smaller than that of a toilet paper roll.
>>682036732
doesn't work, corn starch and water makes what you see in the pic but it crumbles away and cannot be fucked
