Feels thread /b/ >Tell me a bit about her.
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Feels thread /b/
>Tell me a bit about her.
I think I might have made it guys.
My friend just told me today that a girl I've been talking to wants to go to prom with me
Other than that life's not so great, but that's the best news I've had in months
6 months strong, She won't let me fap but won't send pics
>>680083524
Good anon, I hope everything gets better for you. The past couple of months have been rough on me as well.
I do have a green text story if anyone is interested, I would like a bump though if possible to give me a bit of time to write it.
>>680083175
She doesn't love me and I don't love her, but we stick together.
>>680083817
Thanks friend, same to you. How have you been holding up?
>there is no her
end of story
>I guess I could say it was awhile ago but only felt like it was yesterday. I was 16 at the time in high school, I've >always hated the public scene because I always had trust issue with people. I did have a circle of friends that I kept >close, but I'll never forget the day I met this one girl named Ashley. She sat behind me in my English class, she had a >face of an angel but the intentions of a demon. She did catch my interest right away, just by simply through a note over >my shoulder onto my desk asking me simple questions about myself. I still even have a couple of notes I kept over the >years just to remind myself how even though someone can act innocent and loving, they can still be hateful monsters.
>That's when she suddenly asked me to come over to her house, I didn't really care that much about coming over but I >still accepted her offer. Later that night, I arrive at her house, her place seemed a bit ran down and looked a bit trashed >on the out side. I almost thought this was some kind of joke of some sorta, but I stepped out of my Mother's car and >waved her off. Walking towards the turn, before I could even step on the door mat, she opened the door and tackled hug >me. She was clearly excited to see me, and was eager for me to come in. Making our way into the house, it was a >pretty big mess and I figured out quickly why.
>She was still living with her Mother, and a couple of her siblings that had children of their own. I'm guessing they didn't >make much income, but I didn't let that bother me. Times were a bit rough because of the American economy just went >down hill after the home market crashed. We sat in the living room and talked for a bit, and that's when this little girl >who I thought was maybe her sister said "Hey Mommy!". That's when it hit me like a ton of bricks she had a child. I >can't say I was too shocked, but more or less surprised. A lot of girls then got knocked up, it was sad but yet common.
Keep going?
>>680083175
Okay, here goes
>Be me, 16
>greasy little loserfaggot, a few male friends, but more or less resigned to never speaking to girls or having one in my life.
>girl I used to annoy the fuck out of for shits introduces me to her cousin, and we both troll hera bit together.
>Newgirl named Samantha - truly a beautiful person, incredible face and a body to match and the sweetest, most caring personality I've ever seen to this day
>grow to know Samantha more
>She's clearly showing signs of being into me for some absurd reason, although she's very shy
>me, being a greasy faggot, can't quite believe it and don't make a move
>Christmas rolls around
>asks me to be her boyfriend
>complete shock, must be a joke, right?
>after several minutes, agree
Interest? Continue?
>>680084872
Please go on Anon.
>>680084151
That's the fucking truth right there brother
>>680085060
Anon, it's hard to say if you're blessed or not. That is it harder to face the fact that she'll never exist or to know she does exist but you'll never be able to hold her...
>>680084872
>grow to know Samantha more during the spring of 2010
>still look back at this time as the happiest in my life
>Samantha was honestly the most selfless, giving person I had ever met
>had barely any money but would spend it to buy gifts for others just because she loved them
>spent hours wrapping gifts, writing nice notes for people who really needed it
>but problems
>every aspect of her personal life was a complete disaster
>crippling mental issues, anxiety, depression, a fog that would set over her mind and make it impossible to think straight
>low weight issues, incredible and unexplainable muscle and joint pains that doctors were unable to help
>piercing headaches and constant sore throats that left her bedridden, unable to move
>through some strange affliction required an absurd amount of sleep - 12 hours of sleep would leave her as tired as if I'd had 6 hours
>insomnia, only a couple of toxic friends who would mistreat her
>a terrible family life and a borderline abusive sister
>too sick for school, she'd dropped out in grade nine and couldn't reattend
>if there was ever a greater disparity between the life this girl deserved and the one she'd receuved, I've never seen it
Con't
>>680084275
I've been trying harder and harder lately, I feel like everyone is against me. I just gotta keep pushing though, if I make excuse or start crying now I'll never find a reason to improve.
>>680085366
She's says I am I get her off every time but there's no more feels there it's just the act it's self
I lead myself on with ideas and delusions of grandeur with her, while at the same time she brother zoned me. I hated myself and then I got over it
>>680085807
>she brother zoned me. I hated myself and then I got over it
WEW LA. Fucking wew
>>680085475
>>680083175
Fuck her.
>>680085475
>>680085978
>together Samantha and I grow stronger
>she teaches me that I can dress well, actually talk to people, be an attractive person
>I help her painstakingly through each of her issues
>feels like every time one is solved, 2 more arise
>but we make some progress
>Standing up to her sister. Being independent from her family. Going places on her own. Working her leg strength so she can walk further than two blocks at a time
>all the while falling deeper and deeper in love
>her being a minor weeaboo and knowing some things about Japanese culture, I come up with the perfect birthday gift
>She tells me her wisdom teeth will be removed the week of her birthday
>I spend four months constantly folding and number a never ending series of paper cranes
>In Japan, there is a legend that 1000 paper cranes will bring one wish - traditionally, a cure for illness
>her wisdom teeth come out and as she sleeps on the couch I display one thousand paper cranes, laid out across the floor for her to see upon waking
Con't.
Oh you wanna hear about these bitches?
Bitch #1, met her when I was 19 and she was 17. Nice little girl. Ended up not wanting to date me, but God ALMIGHTY, did she flip her shit when I dated other girls. (We HAD had sex) She threatened Bitch #2, who we'll get too. I should have let her follow through. Anyway, I end up actually dating Bitch #1 for a while until I find out 'her friend Kevin' was actually her fuckboy. And I found out because she put on her facebook that she was 'In A Relationship with Kevin'. Not even a fucking courtesy text. She ended up a drug addicted stripper, and I was called by her friends to try to keep her sober and babysit her in my house so she could testify after her new boyfriend beat the shit out of her. She slit her wrists in my bathroom, ran away when I tried to take her to the ER and I tackled her junkie ass and threw her in my car. Got her baker acted and never spoke to her again.
Bitch #2? Basic fucking bitch. I loved this whore, but she was a cosplay girl. You know the type, consistent need for male validation. She'd do ANYTHING to get it, which pissed me right the fuck off. I ended it after tricking her and telling her I read her facebook messages and she broke down and told me she tried to fuck her old fuckbuddy a month ago. To this day claims she never did it, I don't believe her. We got back together a month later, but she didn't dump the boyfriend she got when we were broken up. So she lead us both on until I found out, dumped her in public and called the guy to tell him what was going on. He didn't believe me, and they've been dating for 3 years. My best friend's girlfriend is her friend and told me she cheated on him again recently.
Bitch #3, she lived in a shitty situation. Abusive mother, poor family, all that shit. I was dating her for a month, found out her Mom was beating the shit out of her. We lasted a year, I got her her dream job by writing her resume and she fucked a dude during their out of state job training.
>>680086072
Tell me about her Anon?
>>680086072
she's knows the code, it's all about reality and making some noise
>>680085590
Good shit man. Keep your head up, we're all rooting for you
>>680086082
Anon, I know how it feels to be the good guy. Yeah, we come in last but if you ever heard the motto "Save the best for last".
>>680086082
>>680086473
>Wakes up and is overjoyed, her family is expressing how sweet it is that I want her teeth to heal
>but her and I know
>this isn't a wish for her teeth, but a wish for her life
>a wish that would slowly come true
>other gifts followed - a song I wrote and recorded myself, a stolen street sign with her name on it, intricate and detailed notes and cards
>one christmas, give a series of 12 gifts leading up to christmas day, each more personal and beautiful than the last
>one ornate tea set I'd made myself
>an old spice rack filled with round jars
>hours of scrubbing and washing to get all the scents out
>28 different teas, each selected by hand with different moods in mind
>hand-drawn calligraphic labels tied on with black ribbon
Con't.
>>680084151
Don't worry newfag. You just love the pussy too much. I once was a young fag like you. In it with a bad bitch cuz the pussy was amazing. She would do anything. Needless to say, I hated her and she hated me - but we loved each other at the same time. Bad emotions, bad life, great sex. Get out and find a bitch that makes you better. End of story. you are welcome.
>>680086309
Oh, some of my comment cut off. Said it was too long. I moved Bitch #3 into my house after finding out her Mother was beating her and supported her lazy ass for 13 months and paid for her airfare/hotel even spending money to the interview out of state and gave her money to get set up for the out of state job training for a month.
>>680086618
>tea set
>one of the greatest gifts I've ever given anybody
>she loves it
>I'm the boyfriend she'd always dreamed of
>she'd the girl I never deserved
>some years pass
>we only grow closer, I trust her with everything
>never had I known what is was to be in love
>true happiness
>to have complete and total faith that no matter what terrible events
>having no money, having no friends
>being a weak man
>any of these things are okay
>the worst possible outcome is okay
>because you know that no matter what it is, she'll be there next to you
>support you
>love you unconditionally
>the biggest personal sacrifices and losses are irrelevant
>because whatever you do, whatever you have to do, she'll understand
>even if she can't, she'll trust that you do
>go wherever you will go
>love and hold you no matter who you are
>a stunning example of human success
>or a drunken, weak, sobbing coward
con't
>>680087134
>enter an old friend, Joshua
>also leads a rough life
>an unbreakable attachment to an awful girl
>doesn't allow him friends
>cheats on him while he lays in the same bed
>generally terrible person
>years of coercion from Samantha and I
>he at last leaves her
>a close friend
>but closer to Samantha
>over the last half-decade she's only grown more beautiful
>men trying to take this from me constantly
>but I don't mind
>after all, what are some desperate strangers when you have this level of trust?
>and my trust for the pair of them was extraordinary
>it cost.
Anybody out there?
>>680087589
I'm listening, anon.
>>680087589
go on
>>680083175
>get invited to travel on a plane
>a really cute guy starts talking with a manly voice
>instantly fall in love with him
>he says his name is Ceayeh or something like that
>we become friends
>sexual tension starts building up
>some hours later he just looks deeply into my eyes and says 'youre a big guy' out of nowhere
>i finally decide to make a move and say 'for you'
>as we start going for a kiss, my buddies start breaking through the plane's windows
>oh fuck
>i forgot i had to crash that plane with no survivors
>mfw had to kill the love of my life
>>680087589
>>680087589
>>680087703
>>680087745
thx
>september
>receive a series of texts I never thought possible
>it's ending
>no face-to-face meeting
>just there one day and gone the next
>she doesn't say but I know why
>her final issue we'd been fighting for was her independence
>from her mother, from her toxic friends
>but never could have guessed from me too
>I know she's leaving me to be with Joshua
>but the truth is even more depressing
>a month later I discover
>he and her were never together
>not through some loyalty to me on his part, though
>but because she wouldn't put out easily
>all of this, gone, for such a worthless reason and nothing to show for it
>>680087799
>>680087971
what? after all that, she leaves you for him and he says no?
>>680087971
I'm so sorry anon :(
We're here for you.
She was my everything. I put all my passion into her. She had the cutest giggles you could ever imagine and completed me in every way possible. We had the same exact tastes in music, and we loved it. We loved each other. Until another guy came. Him and her didn't even work out, he led her on. She misses me but wont take me back. She is confused and in pain and there is nothing I can do about it. She is my sunshine, my only sunshine.
>>680087799
I cried.
>>680087971
Wait so you got super friend zone?
That's it?
Weak.
>>680087971
>>680088299
>>680088334
we aren't done yet
>another month
>recluse, barely leaving the house
>all friends have never known us as anything but together
>the group dynamic, shattered
>but some were still there for me
>in particular a close friend, Alan
>an awesome guy
>so easy to talk with, always gives the best advice, trustworthy, friendly and genuinely concerned for his friend
>buys me beers when I have no money and listens to me drunk ramble
>doing whatever he can to help me through
>two months later
>the group to hang out again
>"oh, Samantha wanted to come too so I said it was okay"
>whatthefuck.bat
>can't just leave
>down a few drinks
>act normal, things are cool
>laugh, joke, have fun with friends and Alan
>she arrives
>tense
>barely can look at her, let alone talk to her
>she leaves to cry
>texts me asking to come talk
>we sit in a stairwell and talk for hours about everything that's happened, about our feelings, about where things went wrong
>maybe we can actually be friends
>maybe this can work
>stay out until 5
>wake up the next morning to a text
con't
I just finished an argument with her, I feel like shit. We all do stupid shit, but she has a way of making me feel worse about it, because I care more about her. She's not as mad right now but I fucked up and I just want to fix it. I love her more than she'll ever know or how much I can ever show. We broke up once and it devastated me, turned me onto alcohol. All in all, think before you act, because she does matter.
>>680087971
when I find that nigga Joshua
>>680083175
mabinogi mabinogi, give me formuloi
>>680087799
Beautiful. Nice dubs btw
>>680088602
>>680088848
>a text from Samantha
>I have something to tell you and I'm scared how you'll take it
>what could possible be worse than the last?
>"I'm dating Alan."
>can barely respond
>hopes and dreams of friendship crumble
>rage-fueled flashes of me and Alan laughing together the night before
>having his arm around me
>looking me in the eye
>I look back to his last text asking me for beer this Friday
>of course
>even he would have the decency to tell me face to face
>two people I trusted most
>how can I trust anyone?
>enter depressive spiral
>much worse than the post-breakup
>barely eating, never leaving home
>speaking to nobody
>compounding with seasonal depression, old anniversaries, and Christmas, valentines holidays
>I've never known a pain like this in my life
>develop terrible coping mechanisms
>run out of money
>pray that if I can only make it through this winter
>if only I can see the sun again
>maybe I can barely pull through
>maybe I can scrape by, wounded but alive
>these thoughts get less and less frequent as I resign myself to living this way, if I can stomach it
con't
>>680089030
Hey man, Mari isn't perfect. We gotta feel sometimes.
>>680087799
Bravo, nolan!
>>680089088
when i find that nigga alan...
>>680083524
godspeed bro, would you tell us how it was?
>>680089088
>>680089453
>>680089088
>but what's this
>a nice day?
>a day not so shitty? Where I can look forward to the evening?
>yes
>I've met a friend, Megan
>we just clicked and I poured out my heart to her
>not only a beautiful person but intelligent as well
>there's something you can't describe without feeling it
>a certain personality click you have with some people
>talk to them twice and you think "yes, I already know we'll get along incredibly"
>the weather turns
>more and more sun and sky
>more and more warm weather
>what is this feeling?
>it's familiar but I can't quite place it
>we hang out constantly
>finally I understand
>it's this feeling from six years ago
>spring, 2010
>a feeling I'd long since archived as unattainable ever again
>a feeling I'd finally closed the book on when Samantha left
>a light heart, a hope for the future, but also so much more
>this is my new spring 2010. This is where my old life ends and my new growth begins
>I know it'll still take time
>to be okay
>I don't know if I can have another girlfiend
>but that's okay because she has no expectations of me
>we can just be whatever we are
>and that's a beautiful new experience for me
>>680087971
OH MY FUCKING GOD
I know this is pathetic, but I really miss /frz/
Back when it was popular we had so much fun, there was so much fresh OC and everyone was really friendly.
Now it's dead. By all rights my life is going just fine but I feel hollow because I don't know when the next time I'll feel that magic again.
>>680089661
One more thing.
>be yesterday
>meeting some online friends for the first time with Megan
>she says she's brought a gift
>because I've been sick and not feeling well
>a tiny giftbox
>"Anon's tea"
>I've never told her what I'd done for me ex
>the tea set I'd given her
>I had to excuse myself to the bathroom
>avoid breaking down and sobbing in front of my friends
>know this, anons
>no matter how difficult your circumstance
>how hopeless everything may seem
>time doesn't stop for feelings
>that's all I could tell myself this winter
>time doesn't stop for feelings
>I could feel lower than any human in history
>but the sun is still going to set tonight and rise tomorrow
>days, weeks will still pass
>and in time, maybe even months or years
>that pain will fade a little
>It's okay Samantha
>I forgive you.
>>680089661
>>680090058
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZUlNjHRTD4E
>>680090058
holy shit that was beautiful. bravo, sir. way to be the bigger man
>>680090058
Thank you anon, your words mean a lot. Thanks for sharing your experiences with us.
>>680083175
we were chatting up a storm, I got my hopes way up, asked her how she felt, and she told me she doesn't know. She has now stopped talking to me. I miss talking to her.
Everyone Anon here has made be feel better, thank you.
>>680090058
This was a really nice story. You know, it's only once in a million years that a greasy fuck like you or I gets a girl like that. We're the lucky ones.
>>680083175
The only girl I wasn't able to get...
>be me senior year
>in gen chem cause I was and am gonna major in chemistry
>2nd semester rolls around and this girl I've known about and who is friends with all of my friends but who I had never talked to.
>I forget how but we start to talk just as friends no feelings what so ever.
>she is an athletic nut likes to run and swim and all she has small boobs but a nice firm butt.
>asks if I want to run with her, me gamer, band geek but I run atleast one mile a day to stay fit don't want to turn fat.
>I say sure cause I have great Cardio we run like 6 miles
>we start hanging out alot after that.
>I'm constantly at her house her mom likes me I spend hours with her, she has a secret she likes to watch anime
>fucking fall for her cause she is just perfect in my eyes even though she has had a sketchy past I couldn't care less
>we spend hours and hours together cuddling watching movies, anime, running, and doing homework together and online test.
>tells me she likes me and and I confess my feelings as well.
>rkoOutofnowhere.jpg we kiss one night she says she doesn't want a bf. Cause of an ex. I respect her decision and tell her I like her but I won't try anything unless she wants to
>stonecoldstunner.gif she starts talking to some other dude and becomes his gf.
>still talk some times the rest of the semester, they break up before graduation and prom.
>made prom date while she was taken fml
>ditch my date and pick her up to be my date for the after party that was getting thrown by my group of close friends.
>great time nothing happens.
>day before I move out to go to uni. I spend most of the night at her place.
>nothing ever happened.
>here's a kicker she so happened to be going to the same uni. As me but this is already too long so I'll leave it at that for now unless someone wants to hear a bit more.
>>680089661
>>680090058
That sucked. She trades your relationship twice and you just take it?
Lame.
Sounds like you were super passive and never truly got to say how you feel. And then thats it. Like a month later we will be reading about Megan.
>>680090692
This was the only thing that made me cry a little.
Which one would you choose Anons?
>Personally... I can't....
>>680090152
>>680090280
>>680090370
Thanks for listening.
>pic related, teaset for my ex
>>680090985
No problem Anon
>brohug
>>680090807
interested
>>680090985
thanks for sharing
>>680090985
Is that a true photo anon?, cause that tea looks alot like this one.
>>680091337
And heres a link:
http://imgur.com/a/mBfRg
>>680090814
I suppose I just took it. But the moment she told me that she wanted to leave, the relationship was irrevocably changed. When I say it came from nowhere, I mean out of the blue. I never possibly would have suspected her to think anything like this.
There wasn't a single person whose reaction was anything other than complete shock when they found out what happened. I knew instantly that there was no going back to what we had from that, and it was less painful to just not say anything.
In December though, I did meet to get my things back from her place. I managed to tell her things from my perspective, and I could tell it pained her a lot to realize what she'd put me through. She hasn't contacted me since although I know she desperately wants to be friends, and I'm fairly sure she's witholding it for my sake.
>>680091337
FUCK I FORGOT I POSTED THAT TO REDDIT
Well, that's my ex everybody, I'm a complete and total idiot.
>>680091591
Prove it.
For me it's a him, not a her.
2 hims, actually, my ex and my crush.
My ex broke up with me 3 weeks ago and I can't get over him all the way.
My crush is just like a male version of me. He has the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen on a person.
>>680083175
She's not so much a 'person,' as she is a country. And even though she's a physical country, when I think of "her," I think of my time there, and regret ever leaving her. I think of all the times, the experiences..some great, some not so great, I had while there, with (or in?) her. I dream of seeing her again someday. I dream of being there again for good someday. Now I'm sitting here, studying her language, wishing I had done so when I had the chance to those years ago. I hate everything about my life now, but I know things would get better if I simply left and never came back. I have to see her again.
>she might actually be reading this.
>friend of my best friend's sister
>be 23
>she 24
>she wanted us to start dating
>be naive and fall in love
>aching because she stopped caring
>feelinglikewoodyallen.avi
>falling in love with a girl that just wants to have fun but nothing serious
>don't just want to fuck, want her to be gf
>feel like an idiot for not being alpha enough to just fuck her and leave
>shootmeplease.jpg
>nevermoralfagagain.json
>>680092139
Faggot.
Or
Tits or GTFO
>Wife and I trying to have child since marriage earlier this year
>Never works but no prob does creative shit to enhance herself and goes to school
>Declares that she wants full time school and no kid for now
>MFW
>Says might be preggo
>Sweet
>Says it's a problem
>Says will resent baby for holding her back
>Pre-req from her side for marriage was to has babies
Fuck my life
I've been in love with my best friend for half of my life and only now is she seeming interested in relationships at all.
I'm hoping that now is my chance to be with her and make sure she's mine forever.
>>680091935
that's my sweater in the pic, still have it
Good enough?
His name is Mark. I was living in his country for a few years. I was supposed to live there forever, but some shit got messed-up with my visa. After lawyers and all kinds of hell my only hope left was to get what they call a "de facto" visa, because I was in a committed relationship. This would require him to be out of the closet and offcially declare our relationship. It tormented him. He grew to hate me because I had always promised him I had everything sorted out. In the end he couldn't do it. I lost everything, my job, my home, and him, and I had to leave the country. By the time I got back here to the USA he had unfriended me on facebook. It's surreal, it's one big fucking nightmare, and here I'm in the same situation he was in there. Nobody knows what I really lost and nobody gives a fuck about my depression. I'm not even the same person, it's like it's not even real.
>>680091217
Ok no one usually responds to what I post but here you go
>uni starts, we hang out a bit, I moved in with my sister and she lives on campus
>we have similar majors so we had 1 class together but we didn't talk much in it organic chemistry not much talking going on.
>I go over to her dorm we play on her wii a bit some days or just watch TV or talk and catch up.
>my feeling stay the same but I'm not sure about her but she seems happy to be around me and I really love her company which is rare for me to like someone's company.
>she buys me lunch one time with her limited guest pass meal plan, I guess I took that to mean she liked me atleast a little.
>Both of us drop the class we have together so no more real communication cause I worked lived off campus.
>one of my friends came over to visit we have a 4 person gaming party 2 of our friends and her since she knows my only friends longer than me btw.
>get drunk play Mario party and Mario kart drinking game.
>me drunk as fuck winning like a boss vs 150 cc bots and them.
>quoting fucking wukong from league of legends the most fun I have had since I got into uni.
>night ends and my two friends leave and get in the car and wait for me outside while I took a piss.
>we hug once I get out, and she makes asks if she really got fat cause one of our friends said so (she is no more than 100lbs) I say no and say she had a great body and I think she is perfect.
>pick her up she wraps her legs around my waist and we go fall to the bed.
>we look at each other smile and just say stupid things I can't remember I was kinda far gone and at that point.
>nothing happens we kiss again and she walks me out.
>don't talk to her for a while again.
>randomly snap chats me
>she now had a boyfriend but I got a snap chat from her the other day in a tank top with he laying on the bed alone.
>say hi back doesn't reply.
>>680091217
Fuck man she is the like the great white buffalo. I honestly love her, I can be the real me around her, not even a girl I dated for 2 years came close to this girl. I just don't know man I'm really cold heated with love and all but she got underneath my thick shell.
>>680092881
FUCKING BRAVO GOOD SIR OR MADAM!
Legit story.
>>680093974
Definitely more than I meant to have posted but that's my own fault for being a careless poster
As long as my ex is being posted though, let me put up a better picture
I honestly don't even know. It's been a long time since I really felt something substantial for someone, and I'm not sure i I really am now or not. I wanted to fuck her last year, more of a friend with a fling type thing, but then we got close and I lost that feeling, I just wanted to be friends. We live together with two other people know, he best friend who is also a good friend of mine, and my really close friend. And as of lately thoughts have just been wandering into my head, thoughts about her. And I don't want them I don't think, I like what we have but part of me wonders if I want more..
>>680093701
think about the fact that you're treating her like a friend. It's a shot in the dark really, either you mess up something great or make it perfect. it's up to you man.
>>680093670
Sounds like a relationship where you should have gone for it or left that cause that situation doesn't feel rewarding to be in at all
>>680093701
>>680094515
But play your game smart. Calculative, think hard about your moves. I tend to think of romance as a game of chess, it keeps me out of trouble and i still manage to progress with this one girl i'm dealing with.
Who here feels isolated or just plain lonely? Like there are people in my life and I talk to them every now and again, but I can;t help but feel distant from them all.
It gets to the point where you realize people don't seem to want anything to do with you unless there's something in it for them. Shit's lonely. What do you do when you've always been the person people turn to when they need help, but you have no one who wants to put up with you when you have problems of your own?
Like is it better to have "friends" that make you feel lonely at times, or to be completely alone?
>meet qt freshman year in hs
>we have a few classes together and become fast friends, we're into a lot of the same music, she likes video games, we have a similar sense of humor, we always have fun spending time together
>friends are always asking us about our relationship, we both play it off
>i awkwardly ask her if she'd want to be my girlfriend, she's already seeing somebody
>still hang out with her in class
>they break up after a few months
>im14andwhatisagraceperiod
>she dates someone else, this time for about 2 years
>don't have any classes together sophomore year, hang out in homeroom twice a week
>have a class with her junior year, we sit together every day
>i tried pursuing others in this time, and she always seemed to be interested in who i was crushing on
>turns out i'm not really as good with girls as i thought, or maybe other girls couldn't compare to her
>senior year we have the same classes at different times
>don't spend as much time together, but we talk online regularly
>we sat together at graduation
>hang out a few times after getting out of school
>she has a new boyfriend
>we text occasionally
>stop hearing from her
>don't see her for 3 years
>message her on fb out of the blue and she gives me her new number
>we text each other half the night as if we hadn't spent so long apart
>call her a few weeks later to see if she wants to hang out
>she excitedly says yes
>spend another night talking as if we did this all the time, she suggests things we should do later
>ask what her plans are for valentine's day
>she's seeing a movie with another new boyfriend
>she gives me a hug before i go home
>we text each other sporadically
>she isn't messaging back as much
>she hasn't answered my calls
It really is terrible to meet someone you have such great chemistry with who never seems available. She's so hard to read, I don't even care about being friendzoned because I genuinely enjoy spending time with her.
I'm the type of person who doesn't enjoy people's company so much, except a certain few I only have like 7 real friends i chat with on messenger and all cuz I'm in uni. And moved away. I also just don't know how to make friends anymore I'm only 20, I kinda wish I had more people to talk to but if I did idk what to say to keep a convo going. Unlike with the 7 of my friends we can just talk about anything at all.
>>680094851
Well when she breaks up with the dude I'm going for it I honestly can't stand the feeling of not knowing what could have been.
>>680095837
Anon, a lot of foolish mistakes are made by throwing caution to the wind. If you seriously do this then back up your courage with brains.
>>680096336
I'm not just gonna ask her to be my gf lol I'm not some dweeb but I mean I'm gonna take the risk of setting things up so I can get to that point.
>>680083175
mabinogi... this alone gives me feels
Why is it that we think that other person is someone special? There are hundreds of others out there just like them? Even if they hurt us we try to justify it. Are we just unable to let go?
Why do we keep trying in hopeless relationships? Why aren't we able to just be happy? Why are some people not meant to be loved?
>>680083175
>Be me
>Have awesome job
>Smoke meth
>Fuck prostitutes for hours
>Play WoW on downtime
>Happiest I have been in my whole life
So here is my story:
This is my first year in the University, i'm studying Chemistry so i thought i would be alone when i started classes but it turns out some of my old classmates from school are also in some of my classes. I almost never spoke to them so i had a hard time getting use to them. They had a friend, let's call her "A", when i saw her i didn't thought a lot about her but when i started speaking more with her i realize that she is a really a nice girl. I started getting feelings for her. Then i realized that "A" and a friend were a little bit to close... i don't know how to describe it but if you saw them you would think that they were a couple. So, i tried to stop feeling something for her, then "A" started using profile pictures saying stuff like "It's better not to force things" and shit like that. After that, they stopped being so close with each other but they are still friends. I speak a lot with "A" in person and in chats so it's not like we are strangers, i think we are pretty close, but i feel like she only see me as a friend. I don't want to say that i like her becouse i feel like she will reject me and that will fuck up my group of friends or at least break me apart from them.
What would you do in my place /b/?
>>680099102
Sounds gay and pointless
>>680099237
Well you have somewhat a version of my story lol, but idk about advice since I didn't or still don't have the girl all I can do is wish you luck.
not one for symathy. never was.
> go visit dad in hospital
> recently in for heart trouble
> code blue
> goto room boom
> fast forward two years mom dies of cancer
> lives fine never affected me.
moral: everything you believe, any perception of appreciation could be mimicked in any light with any result of a feeling. you basically must realize all is temporal. if you believe that. all will be gone in a short time. who cares. what we have and what we get is what is right now. and as long as there is a now than everything is forever. as long as we recognize that
>>680084730
Keep going nigga
>>680099705
Thanks, i hope you can solve your situation too
>>680083175
Storytime /b/
>Be me, second semester senior in HS
>Broke up with long term girlfriend a few months ago. My idea, but, still sucks.
>Be a part of Model UN (inb4 gay, just shut up and read)
>At a conference, meet this girl.
>Let's call her L
>L is 8/10 qt3.14 that I meet just chilling outside the elevators
>We talk a bit. Then a bit more. Walk all around the hotel, just... Talking.
>One of the greatest memories of my life is sitting down, and just talking with her.
>Spend the rest of the conference going everywhere together and talking
>End of conference, figure, ill never see her again, whatever.
>She hits me on the head with a rolled up magazine and tells me how stupid I am.
>Gives me her number.
>Spend the entire summer talking to each other.
>Never go a day without texting, never go half a week without calling.
>Talk about everything. Hopes, dreams, fears, what we want to major in, family, everything.
>When we run out of shit to talk about we just say nonsense.
>Realize we're basically the same person. So alike in so many ways.
>Meet up again, just once. She's going to college near my home, I'm going to college a few hours away.
>Take a few photos, walk to the waterfront.
>Go to college.
>Realize I've fallen in love with this girl.
>Because I'm a dumbass I realized too late.
>We talked about relationships, said if we went to the same school we definitely would be in one.
>Wrestle with this for weeks. Back and forth between my not wanting to be selfish and a desperate need to be selfish.
>Sat fuck it. Call her. Tell her how I feel.
>She says she doesn't want to do long distance, but if I still feel the same way at the end of the year to try.
>Not a no, not a yes.
>Not happy, but I figure it's fair. It's reasonable.
>Week later I see on Facebook "L is in a relationship"
>All her friends at college commenting how happy they are for her and some guy.
>Heart stops.
>Can't breathe.
>Cry like a little bitch.
Cont?
>>680100767
moar
>be me
>not complete autist
>bit of an autist tho
>dump 6/10 gf cuz I'm better than that
>be sad and alone
>can't get any qts
>3 years
>jerk to ex gf fb pics like the slime that I am
>depression (surprise faggot)
>say fuck it and buy a swaggy Chad hat
>literally a week later score 9/10 qt
>still autist
>haven't boned her (doot doot)
>get mad anxiety when she dosn't text back
She could easily have any dude she wants.
>>680083175
She's so beautiful
She smells so amazing
Her laugh is the cutest thing
She is actually interested in conversation
She's willing to actually waste the day away on long ass car rides
She's willing to listen to me complain
She's actually worried about my well being
She's just like me. Everything about her.. She has the most beautiful eyes I can get lost in. She enjoys having my car get thrown around corners. She's so indescribable that this entire mess gives her no justice..
I mean. I guess I can't even say she 'cares' about me anymore. I don't know what she feels towards me anymore. I want to say I don't care what she feels towards me.. But I do care, and I always have cared.
I always will.
>>680084730
Good story but FUCKING LEARN HOW TO GREEN TEXT FAGGOT
>>680084730
Lern 2 greentxt
>>680092881
Don't know why this fucks me up so bad.
>High school me
>Popular with all cliques oddly Guess because I was chill stoner dude
>Really weird emo girl probably 80 lbs max
>Had body of a 12 year old not attractive at all
>She had no friends at all constantly bullied for being weird
>Walking in hallway see this shit go down
>Decide to be white knight for some fucking reason
>After incident she tries to talk to me every chance she gets going out of her way to go where I am
>To my friends I act like I hate but secretly enjoy it
>Next semester we have gym together along with a girl I'm currently trying to fuck
>Weird girl always interrupts my suave ways and causes hot girl to walk away, because shes just fucking that weird
>Whatever, I'm not an asshole and probably high
>I get to know her better find out her life is utter shit, pretty obvious just looking at her tbh
>She cuts her mom is dead and dad is abusive pretty heavy shit that I won't go into detail
>She asks to hang out but I'm somewhat popular can't lose face and I'll probably never fuck cute girl if I hang out with weird girl, so I come up with some bullshit reason why I can't
>Realize that's a shitty thing to do but oh well gotta look after my own self image
>Weird girl is almost going full stalker now hangs outside my normal hangout place avoid her
>A year passes I'm a senior shes a sophomore I think.
>I have girlfriend not cute or weird girl
>Weird girl stops trying to talk to me kind of feel bad but that's life
>Weird girl gets a boyfriend weird boy is what I'll call him
>Weird boy is a dick to her, everyone sees it knows about but no one does anything including myself and teachers
>Weird girl ends up pregnant and gives birth prematurely
>Weird boy leaves never to be seen again
>At this point I'm out of high school and I think she dropped out.
>Have her as friends on facebook decide to see whats going on with her because I'm bored
>Baby is dying
Cont?
>>680085590
Bro. You got this shit. Seriously. You're the fucking man. All you have to do is try bro. I believe in you.
>>680100767
Fuck it. Cont.
>Cry like a little bitch.
>Do the "mature" thing. Text her I'm happy she's happy.
>Says she didn't know how to tell me.
>Spend the next few weeks in a haze.
>Try to "remain friends" with L.
>Talk to my best friend a lot about it.
>Best friend is a girl I went to HS with. Very different from me, has a boyfriend, one of the most genuinely nice people I've ever met. Let's call her S.
>inb4 "did you and S hook up?" no. Too different. Wouldn't have been a good relationship but as friends, as friends we're perfect.
>I drink. A lot.
>S tells me I need to cut contact with L.
>I don't want to.
>Of course, S is right. Send a week trying to get L on the phone.
>I'm not a jackass, I don't just stop talking. I give a fucking explanation.
>L just won't call or pick up when I call.
>Finally say fuck it, send her a long text saying it just isn't healthy for me.
>Few weeks, no word from L.
>Alternate between thinking she's respecting my statements and that I don't even matter enough to her to merit a response.
>Eventually get a text. Says she wants to remain friends, that she thinks I'm being unfair.
>Try to tell her I just can't.
>Won't listen.
>Never could say no to her. I agree, say I'll try.
>Half-ass it for a bit.
>Don't talk much anymore. A few cursory Hey how are you's once every couple of weeks.
>Never more than 3-4 messages in a row.
>Try to say hi once a week.
>She usually doesn't respond.
>Im pathetically happy when she does.
>God I hate myself.
>She said if I still felt the same at the end of the year to call her, remember that?
>Put it on my calendar.
>Saw it when I looked, just last week.
>"Call L"
>I've been drinking again.
>Don't know how to handle this.
>Still in love. Tried, tried so hard not to be.
Still am though.
>>680102210
No happy endings anons. Sorry.
Problem is I still have hope. Gonna be in the same area this summer. Of course she still has a boyfriend. I'm still... Me.
>>680095067
I felt that way for awhile and then I just kinda stopped picking up other peoples messes for them when I realized shitty people will always have problems and almost never help you with yours. Of course then the one person I actually cared about killed himself and now I literally don't give a fuck about anyone else and I've never been more unhappy so idk lol, still feels a lot more consistent and secure
>>680103060
Fuck her.
Give her a reason to hate herself for not being with you.
>>680100767
Ya man please do
what does it feel like to be loved /b/?
>>680102070
Fuck it not many posters and this will at least bump the thread.
>Baby is dying because of complication due to it being a premature birth
>Decide to message her try to make her feel better or something
>She's excited I messaged her and we have a conversation about everything that happened
>Turned out weird boy raped her and got her pregnant don't know if that's true or not but whatever
>She confides in me telling me everything having a real deep conversation about emotional shit obviously
>She keeps messaging me and I don't mind got nothing else better to do and I'm there only one there for her
>Her daughter dies in the hospital
>I go to the funeral
>Literally just me and her
>I'm by no means emotional but this is depressing beyond any means
>the priest gives his sermon to the two of us
>Decide to go to the burial as well still only us two
>I continue talking to her because I'm seriously worried about her mental state at this point
>A few weeks pass and she stops answering
>I had a terrible feeling what happened but didn't investigate
>She committed suicide.
That's not even the worst part either, I was the only one at her funeral. The part that really fucks me up isn't the fact I could have prevented it, it's the fact this girl literally had a shit life way shittier then anyone else I know, even though she was weird she didn't deserve that no one does and because of shitty circumstance after shitty circumstance shes dead and the more I think about her the more I realize how many guys on here alone would think she was the perfect gf she liked metal music watched anime played video games and literally had a loli body some /b/ tards would kill to have that, I just hope that she finds the peace and comfort she so wanted in life in death
>>680104030
Find out
>>680104221
I would if anyone loved me. Some people are perhaps just unlovable.
>>680083175
She moved on
>>680104466
You can't just expect someone to love you, and anyone can be loveable, you just have to be willing to open yourself up to someone else.
I began being attracted by her when I was her teacher, in 2011. She had a boyfriend from 2009 (I think) to 2014. I didn't care too much, so I forgot everything about her. Later, in 2015, I found her in facebook, and then added her. She accepted me! After 3 weeks having long conversations, we went out for a pizza bar. But nothing happend, we just had conversations, full of laughs. Then we went to the movies, to a park... and I didn't notice she was giving a chance to me. And I'm very afraid of trying something. Months later I invited her to go on a trip with me. She agreed and I bought our tickets. It would be the first time of her in a plane. But then things went wrong. I think she waited too long of any move from me and got bored. Like if I was friendzoning her. So she decided to not travel with me and stop talking to me. Months later, in Februray/2016, we came back talking, went out to a the same pizza bar, were all began, and I finally told her whatI fell about her, since 2011. She said she wanted to not have any date now, just have friends. Then we slowly had less conversations and now we have none. She invited me to her party of bachelor degree conclusion (I don't know the name of this kind of party), ans to a party in his house with his family, but nothing happened again. Now we're not even friends and that's it. I have cried a lot since this, that happened in March. She was everything I wanted in my life. I'd like to build a family with her and make us happy every day. =(
Sorry for bad english, it's not my primary language and my vocabulary is very little.
her name is Alexis. I love her, and I always will. We could have had everything but both of us screwed up in our own ways. I screwed up by not telling her to stay with me for New Years instead she flew away with another guy: even though she wanted me. All I had to do was tell her to stay and that I cared for her more then just a fuck buddy. I'll always remember the moment when she was laying on my stomach and I was on my back. It was Christmas Day and I was afraid of her leaving. She laid on my stomach and wiggled her body. She told me she would give me some of her luck by wiggling it to me. last I heard she was drinking herself to death and was finishing the semester in Dartmouths medical ward. And I just ruined a good relationship with a great woman named Megan because I just have horrible trust issues. She dumped me a week ago over text. And I cried, but I cried because of the memories I had with Alexis. God I love her
>>680105039
>anyone can be lovable
Is that really true?
What of the ugly and irredeemable?
Not everyone is able to be loved or capable of being loved. What of the retards of the world, or the hideous, the sociopaths who will never feel true compassion or the dregs of society who are hardly wanted by anyone that has to interact with them?
Love is merely contingent in most cases. Some people may merely be outside of this by having nothing of value to offer others.
Even if you're open it doesn't mean that'll ever be reciprocal.
She's a man-eating fly trap with a gay pet iguana, and I'm just a gangly twerp that she mauled unconsciously.
Females only exist in my reality as a sedative to my rampant loneliness, autism, and horrific coping mechanisms.
>>680083175
I had a girl that I had 6 years of history with.
I tried my hardest to make her happy.
She eventually chooses this other guy over me.
We were pretty mature about it and she just told me plain and simple.
I dont know whats worse, always thinking theres hope or knowing that there is none.
Anyway, the guy she chose over me died in a helicopter crash a couple years later.
I dont know how to feel about it.
I completely let her go and am happily engaged to another girl now.
I watch how miserable she is on social media knowing how fucked in the head she is now.
Im sure she tries to get over it and forget but the guy how died's sisters are always posting on her shit calling her sister and bring up every anniversary of his death.
Im not sure that shell ever be happy.
I am though.
Im sure it kills here to see my engagement photos on facebook.
I havent said a word to her since she picked him over me.
I feel really weird about it.
I would never want anything from her ever again. But I strangely like watching her suffer on social media.
Am i a bad person?
Its pretty fucking weird.
>>680105211
Just to show another photo, now of me with her. We have very few photos together, Thar's my favorite of them. We were in a soccer match of my our favorite team. It was her first time in a stadium.
>>680105691
Anyone can be loveable my man.
There's a paperboy in my town with downs hes overweight and smells like shit but he found another girl with downs also overweight and smells like shit, they are married and have been for over 10 years.
>>680102070
>>680104179
Fuck that's depressing.
>>680084730
After Ashley comforted her daughter for a minute or two, the little girl ran off to another room. Ashley then brought up the fact she had a daughter. She explained to me how she thought I would think less of her. "No, it's fine Ashley things happen ya know?" That's when she started to go into detail about how she ended up with a daughter and explained how she was drunk at a party and raped against her own will. My face went pale, I was morally disgusted.... That's when I was suckered in to believe that this horrible person was a victim.... The night moon slowly started to raise, and that's when I said it would be best to take my leave for now, and invited her to my house.
We started to become closer and closer, and we even started to consider ourselves best friends. We wrote notes to each other in class, we kept a journal recording our personal conversations, and for once in my life... I can say, I felt like someone understood me. The feeling when someone understands you so well, you can just look into their eyes and feel their pain, understand their humor, understand that you're never going to be alone when I'm here for you. Maybe, my heart was over taking my common sense at this point, I wanted to be around this girl and she wanted to be around me. This is when I got too close, and started to see the real demon within.
Sorry Anons, I'll drop the green text then. But I'll keep going with my story.
>>680106032
our favorite team (forgot to delete the "my", because I remembered that was her favorite team too) :P
>>680104179
Life is interesting. It doesn't make us stronger, no it's up to us to make ourselves stronger. Life gives us the ability to witness and experince massive amounts of unhappiness. If we allow ourselves to witness/experience it and not drown it with drugs or sex. We become wiser.
>Been with the same chick for about 4 years.
>Grow to love her quiet a bit
>All we do now is argue
>Found out that all she does is lie to me
>Whole relationship feels like a lie
>I leave her (today, actually)
>I don't feel sad, per se more like angry that I wasted the grater part of my teenage/ young adult life on a lying bitch
>What do to feel less stressed out?
>>680105691
You don't have to believe me. I'm just saying if there's a will there's a way.
>>680106230
I guess at this point, we were considered a couple. Roughly a year has past and I spend a whole summer with Ashley, and even spent some time with her daughter. School started up once again, and fall set back into place. That's when I've noticed she started to hang out with another guy, I wasn't jealous or anything but he was trying to get a bit too close to her. The guy's name was Jeff, and he was a bit of a psycho. He hated me, he would send me death threats on a regular bases, from saying how he would poison my lunch to wanting to beat me to death. He would also try to be outside of Ashley's class just to see her and walk her to her next class. This is when I started to noticed how Ashley took interested in this guy.
My anxiety got the best of me at this point, I felt that Ashley was just ignoring me at this point and didn't even care what this guy said to me. That's when I comforted him about the whole thing, I caught him in the hallway and pulled him aside "Listen, all this pity threats you've been telling me don't scare me. I don't even care about you wanting to hang out with Ashley, but threaten me one more time and I will break your fucking nose." Jeff looked shocked, and scared I could see it in his eyes. He ran out of the bathroom, that's when this really went down hill.
He told Ashley what I said to him. That night she came over to my house and we talked about what happened. She told me she wasn't happy with me at all. That's when I blurted out.... "I can't trust you Ashley, you don't seem like you anymore..." She was then outraged, saying how she couldn't believe this and how I was just jealous. That's when she claimed back down, and said "You know Nicholas, I love you. I'm not a good person, and I don't deserve you."
Anyone still wanting me to keep going?
>>680106032
>>680105211
I'm sorry I feel your feels but I don't have oneitis thankfully and have no way or words of encouragement to give you. I just hope that even if it's not her I hope you find happiness and can start a family.
>>680106308
No words have ever been more true
>met a grill summer after my junior year of high school
>total qt, at least a 7/10
>adorable smile with multiple dimples, really nice body, beautiful grey-blue eyes with brown specks
>pretty smart, a bunch of common interests
>still a pretty faithful christian at this point, so it was at a week of jesus/service camp
>we both felt the connection but the week was over before anything came of it
>i live in GA, she's up in VA, sorta near DC
>10+ hour car trip and neither of us have a car so that's out of the question
>we talk for about a year
>texting, phone calls, skype, all the normal distance stuff
>i'm head over fucking heels for this gal
>eventually she slows down in responding
>i say fuck it after a while and just stop trying to reach her
>never makes any effort to talk to me
>be upset for a while but basically get over it
>spend some time before graduation half-assedly chasing some other tail
>nothing ever came of that
>fastforward to now
>almost a junior in college
>haven't really thought of her in a while, although her face will show up in a dream every now and then
>saw a picture this evening that really reminded me of her
>been lying in bed trying to sleep for well over an hour
why does this shit come back out of the blue like this? how do i move the fuck on for good?
>>680106533
pls anon
Went to prom with a girl I fell for,hard. She asked the guy she likes out in front of me. Then when I took her home she complained that "literally every guy is only nice to her to get at her friend". I just wanted to be happy before I ship to the Army.
>>680106533
Ya man.
>>680106182
This story eats at my conscience in such an indescribable way, I've had a rough life combat tours in the military, wife cheating on me while I was away divorced lost almost everything, but this is just an entirely different level of depression almost a hopeless feeling.
>>680106065
Your optimism is reassuring and admirable but being loved and being happy are two separate things. People seem based largely in a set of standards and personal values. love's such a joke. It's just a game of what you can bring to the bargaining table and if that's equivalent. People seem to be out to make a good deal and nothing more really. Somedays I doubt the efficacy of unconditional nature of things in the human condition.
>>680106440
I can't say for certain I belive you, but what if that will leads you to keep pursing a dead end of a relationship? Like pursuing a woman who could hardly give a shit about you? Will and another person's feeling are two separate things. You can hope all you want, but that won;t make someone love you.
No I'm afflicted with tortuous delusions that medication fails to suppress and regularly have homicidal fantasies about women.
Everyone thinks I'm pretty normal though.
>>680106546
Thank you, sweet heart anon!
Just more information about us: I'll be 28 years old in July/04 and she'll be 26 years old in July/11. I dreamed a lot about doing a party for both of us, our family, our friends... I made so many plans. Every sort of plan for a family. I never felt anything like this for anyone before. I don't even know what to do. I'm just here studying in my M.Sc. degree and doing my job fulltime, trying to not think in any women.
>>680091591
She's cute anon, but even a retard could've told you should would cheat on you.
Nobody who dies their hair and gets a lip piercing is emotionally stable enough to maintain a long-term relationship.
We've been doing pretty well, I love her a lot but I feel like I should let her go. I don't get the same affection back as I used to and I'm still showering her with affection. If I don't get what I give back, I don't see this as a worthy girl for me. What do you people think? If I feel like she's cold even though she says she loves me more than anything, should I break up with her?
>>680106755
>>680106889
That's when she told me the truth about her daughter. She was at a party, and she did drink but she willingly had sex with an older guy and then stated it was rape so she didn't look like a whore... I didn't know what to feel. Everything that was told to me.... just felt like a lie. Someone who I bonded with for so long, someone who I thought I understood was never longer there with me in that very room.... Someone who wanted pity, and someone who wanted to be a good person that simply couldn't. Everything that we built on was a lie. "Ashley, I know you can change. Just do it without me.... I love you too." That's when she ran out crying, no a word, no an expression on my face at that point. I had no idea what to feel. That night when I was in bed, I felt a horrible sadness take over me, I didn't miss the girl who I just conforted... I missed Ashley... The Ashley I thought I knew....
>End
Fuck you Ashley, I fucking hate how I can't stop loving you.... I just can't believe you really don't exist..... I fell in love with a beautiful, beautiful lie.....
>>680107104
More to this, I feel like something is off. I'm just not enjoying it as much as I used to. I'm getting bored of her carelessness.
>>680106890
I feel ya. Money can be earned again; same can be said for relationships. But death by suicide just fucks up your mind, there's no way to fix it. I had a friend who sudoku'd 3 years ago, and man it was tough.
Sorry for shitty greentext, on mobile so can't write much
>virgin kissless dateless dude
>never even had the balls to ask a chick out
>only have like, one female I even talk to regularly
>a friend says that a chick is into me
>we start talking, I start liking her
>we talk for about a month, flirt here and there but nothing to really start anything
>fuckyouanon.jpeg occurs
>apparently she's into my best friend instead, being all slutty and shit with him
>Fucking rubs it all up in my face
>back to being the secretly suicidal /b/ browsing faggot I am
>on a slightly unrelated note, what's the least painful way to kill yourself b, I want to but I'm scared
I know you won't see this, but fuck you Olivia and Nicholas, fucking cunts
>She's a perfect gal
>Still pure and sweet, even at her age.
>We share a lot of hobbies
>even though she had a hard life she made it this far and managed to overcome her life circumstances to become someone of import
>Can't help but admire and love her
>she could care less about me
>can't move on
>Getting mixed messages all the time as to whether she really cares about me or couldn't give a shit.
>trapped in a state of emotional purgatory, I want to be with her, but also don;t want to move on.
>She seems like the type you only meet once in a lifetime.
>I don;t know what to do
Lost my small group of friends because of a girl struggling to loose weight shit job got my gun license tho so hopefully soon I can blow my brains out
>>680107080
Completely blocking that out will only make it worse it's a flawed coping mechanism one that I'm guilty of as well though.
>>680107746
Wow I had a similar experience during my teenage years. All that texting, MSN messenger, hanging out, talking about everything - aaaand she ends up fucking my friend. Needless to say I cut ties with both of them. It bugs me until now though, seriously what the flying fuck. We were like building the relationship for almost a whole fucking year, we both know each others' secrets and shit, and out of nowhere she decides to fuck my friend who's not even close with her? The female mind is just cray cray.
>>680083175
This is the first and last time I will ever see Mabinogi on 4chan entirely.
>>680108164
Maybe you're a cuck
Honestly, there is no Her. I gave up on any chance with women before I even got out of high school. I don't really have any goals. My father is always telling myself and my brother and sister how stupid we are and that we don't matter. I have been unhappy no matter what I do. There was one girl, one time, but in retrospect it would never work and besides, she's in a very serious relationship. Even I think we would just ruin our friendship. Any other woman I've pursued has only used me or rejected me hard.I'm only twenty, and both jobs I've had I've been awful at. No college education and mediocre in high school. 300+ lbs and too poor to afford a gym membership or healthy food. I was popular in high school, but I've only retained one or two close friends. I thought i had my depression beat, but I relapse at least twice a week now. I have no job and am unable to move out due to family politics. I don't know if I can do this anymore anons. I feel like my life is headed nowhere fast; like I've already peaked. My only passions are gaming and writing, and I'm afraid I might not become good enough at either to make a living from it. I feel isolated all the time and the more I game, the more isolated I feel and gaming is my only distraction/skill, so it's my natural response to this. As far as writing is concerned, my good ideas come when I'm happy which is spotty. I don't want pity, and I don't think that there is much advice to be given. I just needed these thoughts out there somewhere. Thank you for listening anons.
>>680108164
If I'm to be blunt.
You took to long and your friend was there when she lost hope (She thought you friend zoned her)
>>680108252
We've had a couple threads on 4chan about Mabi. I'm shocked how many /b/tards are on Mari.
>>680107746
Over a girl? Please. Even though I'm unhappy in my relationship and I love my girlfriend a lot, I feel like she's been drifting away and a break up is inevitable, I won't kill myself. I would die for her if situation came, but after our relationship is over, I'm free even though sad, but I will recover, so will you Anon.
>>680107176
Why is is always the Ashley, Megan, and Katies who break our hearts
Be me 13 walking home after school.
Suddenly bully walks out of the corner almost like he was waiting for me he eyes me and says: hey anon where's the rest of your friends ?
Realize that I don't have anyone to help me fend the fucker off. He's a junior in high school and hangs out with the wrestling team he doesn't wrestle but he still built like he does and I'm at least three feet shorter than the guy and pretty scrawny.
Me: there in the drugstore buying some food.(he smiles)
Bully: no they're not I just got out of there your alone.
Me: what's your fucking point ?
Bully: That means no one is around to help your chicken shit ass.
He moves towards me I fucking book it scared that he might beat the shit outta me.
Get cornered under a bridge out of breath out of places to run/hide fan-fucking-tastic
Throw my backpack at him and try to make a run for it.
He grabs me and throws me against the wall (oh shit oh shit oh shit)
Jaw hits the wall hurts like a bitch he starts punching me in the ribs and knocking me upside the head.
Then I hear his pants unzip (wtf) wait what's he's doing ?!
He pulls down mine and starts to violate me all while I scream and yell stop ! And get the fuck off me ! I claw at him I felt so fucking weak.
I try to fight him off but end up breaking my wrist.
Bully: shut the fuck up ! stop fighting !
I hyperventilate as the pain nearly subsides and he finishes I go limp on the ground and kicks me in the groin.
Bully: Listen you little shit if you tell anyone I'll go to your house when your not home and murder your fucking dog.
I lay there holding my wrist scared out of my mind that he might come back and kill me .He leaves I wait an hour later then pick my shit up and start limping home as fast as I could.
>>680108689
I'm not sure Anon, but /b/ won't /b/reak my heart will it? Just thanks for being here for me Anon.
>>680109089
Heard this story before, nice try anon
Most women drift along the peripherals of my life story as some mysterious signal that my life is progressing in the right direction, but that perception is structured by a fantastical narrative that denies the fact they're really savage animals looking for a quick fuck and I'm too incompetent of a human being in order to satisfy them emotionally or physically.
>>680083175
Bisexual faggot here who has feelings for a close friend, how fucked am I?
>>680109244
You clever clever shrew
>be me 19 move to texas meet girl
date for a few months
>move in together she has a son
>start bonding immediately
>kid calls me dad after about a month
>i love that little shit to death
>8 months in i ask her to marry me
>she says yes
>muthafukinfuckyeah
>things start to change
>she's getting distant
>she says she doesn't love me anymore she just wanted to have a good dad for her kid
>try to make things work
>they don't we talk about taking a break
>find out she's pregnant
>try to talk things out
>maybe things will work
>few days later we get into a fight
>she says she's going to her moms
>gone for days
>comes back for her things says it's definitely over
>hits hard bro
>text here next week asking if i can see the kid
>she's pissed says she doesn't ever want me seeing him anymore and if she had her way i wouldn't get to see mine either
>think of killing myself for a few months but eventually decide not to
>see her and kid at store durring this time kid sees me from across the store and almost jumps out of her arms yelling daddy!
>break down have to leave before i cry like a little bitch
>we try talking but she tells me to fuck off
>need time to think
>fuck it im going to alaska
that happened last month still trying to fuiger out my shit
>>680108371
I guess so. It still boggles me though, was she trying to prove something, like making me mad or something since I technically (unconsciously) friendzoned her. Well damn she succeeded though. Things would've turned out quite different if we dated eh. But that was more than 10 years ago, and I have no idea how life turned out for her.
>>680097918
>>680109090
There is not enough women on here for that haha. I think imma go to sleep, good night man. i hope you find the best in this world
>>680109490
I doubt it was done with malice tbh.
>>680109465
>>fuck it im going to alaska
Kek'd
That woman is bonkers. Kid's gonna have a hard life.
>>680089230
I'd fuck the hell out of Nao tho.
>>680109465
kidnap the child. You would make a better parent than a bitch who wont even let you talk to a kid that once called you his father.
>>680109089
Do you ever fantasize of your bully? I miss you cutiepie.
A cat just got hit by a car right outside my place it was yowling in pain, had to put it out of it's misery feels bad /b/ros
>>680109465
That bitch, I feel you even though I don't have kids yet myself. She was never a good person to begin with.
>>680110010
how'd you do the deed? How do you feel about being an angel of mercy for a poor cat?
>>680106615
It's just one of those things you get used to. The feeling never goes away, it just becomes more bearable.
Fuck, I have some major feels pent up... You anons want to hear my tale of woe?
>>680110475
let it out anon
>>680110309
Live in city limits had to use my hatchet. Pretty bitter sweet.
>>680106615
Where in GA /b/rother? Athens reporting in, I hope you start feeling better man.
>>680110576
Sounds heavy yo. Sorry to hear you had to go through that. At least you did the right thing man. good on ya m80
>>680110475
Let's hear it
Alright here we go...
>be me frosh week, age 21 but look 18 still (started late).
>meet this girl on a campus tour, hit it off I guess. Decide to go to this party together after a "welcome to uni" type ceremony.
> Drink a bottle of wine, miss ceremony, but meet a couple dudes who missed it too. Pretty chill.
>head over to buses that'll take us to the party, these guys have some hot girls with them.
>campus tour girl texts me, "where are you I'm omw"
>tell her I'll meet her there, chatting to a qt of higher tier.
>take bus. Go to shitty club. Meet girl but I'm really not feeling it anymore.
>chainsmoke outside of club... Buses are leaving back to campus. And then it happens... This girl in a red dress... Holy fuck. Can't take my eyes off her. Insanely gorgeous.
>she's with crew I made friends with earlier.
>"hey man we're going to a keggar, you should come!"
>need to pursue this girl so I quickly assent...hop on the bus with them and it all starts...
>>680110475
Forgot to link this story is me ^
>>680090058
Thanks for the story anon, I recently went through a breakup and this helped
>>680106413
Gym bro
>recently get diagnosed as a sociopath
>inb4 edgy or fake diagnosis
>Wonder what it's like for other people who are capable of feeling a close bond to others.
>This diagnosis has really fucked me up.
>Almost like a medical certainly that I can never relate or be happy with other people.
>Don't know where to go from here.
>Can't honestly say I care too much
>Just a state of apathy, really.
>May just end up killing myself if things get to be too boring.
>>680113303
meds bro, shit helps
>>680104030
It's great, having someone who you know who cares about you. But there's a drawback. For me, that drawback was that I never foresaw her being with other men behind my back while I was the most vulnerable I have ever been.
>>680113303
I got medically diagnosed as well as a teen. It doesn't really matter to me though.
>>680111810
>try my best to be cool and all that shit. But fuck it's hard to keep my composure around red dress...
>walking to frat house, trying to get her interested.
>tells me she likes "preppy guys" aka chad.
>tfw I don't wear boat shoes :'(
>arrive at lame frathouse.
>welcometomynightmare.jpg
>I've fallen hard for this girl, she's super cold to me though.
>drink loads of the free beer, mixed with orange juice because it tasted awful on it's own. Trying to drink past my spaghetti.
>she's chatting with this prep frathouse guy
>fuck I'm 21 and I'm losing to someone 18 what's wrong with me.
(anyways this much detail is getting long)
>long story short I throw up in the bushes but no one sees, she ends up rejecting this other guy, we eat mcdonalds and chat about life (me her and her dyke friend).
>I drop them off at their dorm and say "uh it'd be um really nice to see you again... u-um could I get your number?" I still cringe at being this beta...
>she says yes though! I give her my phone she puts her name with no number, I'm like uh you forgot to put in your #...
>she puts it in and it's not fake, feel like a champion sorta, I was pretty drunk.
The next part is where everything gets totally fucked. Should I continue?
>>680106905
Happiness is a choice, Anon. Happiness should come within you and yourself alone, no one else should be able to dictate whether you're happy or not
>>680113546
Post dat shit
>>680083175
She told me she hated me the day i was going to say i love you
>>680092881
post tea, those sweaters are everywhere...
>>680113423
is medication even worth it?
What's the point of experiencing happiness if it's only the derivative of medication?
>>680114254
It's something dude, maybe it will eventually help you lead a great life, you never know.
>>680114446
That's a valid point. perhaps happiness supported by a crutch is better than free willed unassisted misery.
>>680114254
bruh i've been dealing with the same sheit
but all emotion is is a chemical balance in the brain, some peoples brains don't produce some of them right, saying that its pointless to feel because of pills is like saying whats the point of living with diabeties because your body doesn't process sugar, trust me brah it'll help, either that or just look for a counselor or therapist
>>680083175
Source on game?
a bit late, but thought I might as well share my tale
>be me 16 years old
>been with girlfriend for about 2 years
>best friends with girl for 4 years prior to dating
>only things that make me happy are her and vidya
>mom recognizes that I have depression
>get on meds, but never remember to take them
>makes focusing and socializing hard, but everything is good when she is around
>girl has been having troubles at home, her mom is a hoarder
>despite me being closer to her than anyone, she doesn't talk with me about it
>she gets mad at me all the time for being sad
>most of the time not sad, just tired
>she ends up breaking up with me
>next week she is already with different guy
>try to confront, ask her why
>tells me that he treats her well, much better than i did
>enraged and defeated, i accept that i must have been a shitty boyfriend
>fast forward a few months
>she is still with other guy, and has since lost many of our mutual friends
>one of them, with whom she shared all her at-home problems with, tells me that she had been cheating on me with that guy for a couple months
>even angrier at myself for not seeing the signs
>see them at school together in hallways
>thatusedtobeme
More?
>>680113869
Nobody should have control over your happiness, but sometimes when you get attached to people that get too close. It's hard not to be hurt by people close to you. If happiness were just a matter of outlook wouldn't we all just choose to be happy all the time? That's the problem anon, I'm seeking the happiness I'm not sure is really there anymore.
>>680114880
maginobi
>>680114939
no do something about it or forever become a cuck
>>680114750
makes sense. Perhaps I;ll look into that then. Thanks for the advice anon.
>>680115283
did do something about it, this was 6 years ago
What's her name /b/?
>>680113546
>text red dress, hey do you know of anything going on tonight? (End of frosh definitely something).
>says she's going to a party but she says she thinks it's all sold out
>should've gotten the message here, but I say I'll grab a ticket at the door.
>we agree to meet there.
>wear chinos to appeal to her prep fetish, drink a bottle of wine again before I leave.
>tfw $10 rosé burps.
>arrive make small talk with her friends, get into club.
>this place was so fucking packed, they completely oversold it.
>so packed you can hardly walk in out or through the place. Full of Arabs, bros, and general degenerates. EDM and trap blares.
>time to pull out my trump card.
>hey turns out I'm 21 want drinks young uni kids? Buy us drinks.
>people are literally trying to grope red dress, so I get protectiveish and block them/push them away. Any decent person would do this.
>we're there for like 15 mins before we decide to leave. Me and her go alone to a bar.
>buy her drinks, buy myself drinks, chain smoke cheap cigs.
>she's snapchatting some guy... But with me in the pictures.
>see the name. ITS THAT FUCKING GUY FROM THE FRATHOUSE.
>maybe I'm winning now? I'm in love with this girl so I hope so.
>time passes she seems more interested in texting this guy... Def losing.
>read texts over her shoulder they're planning on meeting up tonight....
>she says she's going to take the bus back now.
>I'm fucking crushed. I literally have never put my neck out to get a girl like this before. But she was so beautiful I needed to try.
>I get pissed off. Moody af. Walk away with a look of hatred plastered on my face. Head in hands smoking down the block ...
>she follows me and asks what's up.
>"wtf what are you doing texting this guy. I'm right fucking here you know. Do you not feel anything for me at all?!?! What is this shit?!
>"um I barely know you how could I have feelings for you..."
>I continue but she says "you're too old for me, I want someone my age."
>>680116113
Zell, shes with her grandparents now, who actually seem to care about her. So maybe shes doing better, at least thats what I like to tell myself.
>>680113928
Happy to hear my long ass story of pain isn't falling on deaf ears anon
He likes me a lot and I like him as well, but I want to protect him from me. As a girlfriend I'm psycho and have bursts of jealousy so extreme I once send my ex to the hospital. I'm a piece of shit to be committed to, so I try to keep our relationship as friends with benefits. But he gets sad more and more as the days pass, he wants to have something serious, but he just doesn't understand I'm protecting him from the real me.
Do you think it will ever get better or does it only just go downhill from here?
>>680116192
Finale?
>so I don't leave it there. I come home and drunk text her a very long paragraph describing my deep feels for her, while also accusing her of lying to me about the club being sold out of tickets. I tell her she should've just said she wasn't interested, and not led me on like this. All in bitter somewhat harsh words.
>fucking so regrettable. Reading my text the morning after was unglaublich painful.
>moreover I punched one of those glass store front windows on my way home. My hand was really swollen and possibly broken.
>I go about my day. I don't expect her to respond. But I still feel bad putting this poor girl through this. I just got the wrong idea and took things to heart as I tend to do.
>but she does text back.
>I tell her I'm really sorry for what I wrote. I was blackout drunk.
>she asks if I made it home ok,
>I say yeah, thanks. Sorry again.
>I accept my fate and try and forget about this whole thing. Smoke some spliffs as I used to do.
But this wasn't it... There's more. And it's weird, yet short. Shall I cont and finish this up?
Girl I'm into use to date my best friend she's into me and such but friend stares at me when I'm around her he fucked it with her wat do
HER NAME IS AMBER
SHE HAS EYES LIKE HER MOTHER
SHES BEAUTIFUL AND BRIGHT AND THE WHOLE WORLDS IN FRONT OF HER. SHE HAS A SMILE THAT COULD END A WAR.
>>680083175
she had blue dreads. instant in love. she braked me apart ben drinking since then every day
>>680117041
If you both have feelings for each other what's stopping you from being honest with him? Why protect him from you if he wants to get to know the real you? Either way I hope you guys can work something out. Perhaps a bit of honestly would work wonders for your situation.
>we dated
>we loved each other
>I made sacrifices for her
>I planned my future around her
>she got distant
>I tried to save things
>she didn't want to
>we broke up
>she started seeing someone else
>I went crazy
>I wanted to die
>months passed
>I thought I was better
>and now she wants to get back together
What the fuck do I do?
>>680117331
unglaublich gogogo cont
She told me she loved me
then she told me she was afraid of losing her current relationship
They almost broke up over me, but now she's afraid of being alone. FML
>>680118479
ignore her. ex is an ex.. if the first time didnt work.. it never will
>>680083175
I don't know how to describe Evelyn properly, beside the obvious physical stuff. She's a little shorter than me, at 5'7; soft blue eyes and lovely long blonde hair. She has a nice smile and often, when she smiles, she closes her eyes and looks so happy.
I think the defining feature about her though, is that she cares about people. She doesn't need to know them, or have any connection to them, she just cares for them. She was raised by terrible people, who abused her and treated her like dirt; she could have become like them, but decided to take what she'd been shown and turn it around, be nothing like that. She wanted to be something more than they taught her and she worked hard at that.
She went to university and studied architecture, although she discovered she wasn't as passionate about it as she thought. She restarted, focusing on psychology instead; that was a better fit. She loved learning about people and the way the world and their experiences shaped them.
We're the same age; our birthdays are only a few days apart. We met in March; two months after we both turned twenty seven. I fell in love with Evie immediately and spent the next few years learning about her, sharing experiences and growing with her. She had a deeply entrenched streak of sadness that appeared now and then; I did my best to help her through those times, but it became more and more difficult.
Continuing...
She started dating someone. she never told me.
I thought we had a level of confidence and respect with each other that she'd tell me about something that important. Maybe I just don;t matter to her. This is killing me man.
not much to tell you
I love her, that's all I've got
>>680090058
My man.. I have tears in my eye. And I never get emotional. It's so relatable and I hope you do the best to lead a great life sir! May only happy days come in your way.
>>680119046
I had joined a long running local band two years prior to her and I meeting; she ended up being really into our music. She bought all the older albums, insisting on paying for them and supporting us a bit; she'd put them on when she was sad or afraid, it would help calm her down. Our live show is a little intense, so she didn't come to shows after the first one she saw; that's fine though, she was always very supportive and happy that I was doing something that I loved. I'm still with the band, they're very cool people.
Still though, she was sad and becoming more and more sad with every month. I loved sleeping next to her, but she started getting restless and would get up in the middle of the night. She'd play games for a bit, or watch a movie before slipping back into bed, thinking I hadn't noticed she was gone. I'm a light sleeper though. I would get up with her and hang out, at the start. Eventually though, she said I didn't have to, that I should just sleep and get some rest. I foolishly gave in and obeyed.
When we were thirty one, things changed. I couldn't handle her any more. Her pain wasn't overwhelming, but it was always there and I didn't know how to deal with it. It has been a while and I was starting to both take her for granted and become resentful. I when to get a hair cut one day and the stylist caught my attention. She was flirty and asked if I wanted to have lunch when she went on break shortly; I said yes and we talked for a bit, had terrible food court food and went our ways. I couldn't get her out of my mind after that; she was so bubbly and so happy, it was refreshing.
I broke things off with Evie shortly thereafter, knowing that if I didn't, there was a good chance I'd cheat on her. I didn't want to do that, but I couldn't stay with her any longer, it was too draining. She had moved in and moving her things out was both extremely difficult, as well as a massive relief.
Continuing, one more post...
>>680117331
>Switching out of green text for the true finale.
She texts me back a week later. We text back and forth and end up going on a date. She took the initiative, since I didn't want to feel like I was pressuring her anymore. We went for coffee, I didn't drink a bottle of wine beforehand. It was campus in fall, my first year. It was beautiful, she was stunning. We talked and she was really great. Beyond just her being insanely fire hot I actually thought I found a cool girl I could be with. I finally made it to university, and now I can share my life from this point forward with her. See where it goes; everything onwards looked bright.
I thought everything went well, the conversation was effortless and interesting. And she was being responsive, not cold like before. I walked her to class, we hugged, smiled and I truly was beaming with happiness. I tried to schedule another date. She had class then. How about next week? I'm busy. How about... Repeat a few more times. More excuses. Time to let go I guess. Her making excuses had gone on for a while, I really put my due diligence in, but I had to know when to give up. I had a large debt racked up on my phone, and had to switch providers. I couldn't text her with a new number, it'd been too long and I could tell she wasn't interested.
That's that, it was over. She put her full name into my phone so I still periodically stalk her instagram. It still tears me apart seeing her and thinking what could have been. This was almost 2 years ago. I saw her around uni recently in passing. She probably didn't recognize me, but it hit me hard. I still can't forget about red dress.
Anybody have the "Her" picture where its the guy having a ton of things around him and then it cutting to the next section thats just her? I've been looking for it but don't think I have it saved on my computer.
>>680114939
>summer is getting close
>guy she is with will be graduating, won't see him again since he is going to pretty decent school out of state
>it's now or never
>confront him before class starts one day
>tell him that i think he's a shitty person and challenge him like a white knight faggot
>throw first punch, get shit beaten out of me, but still get in some good hits
>do all my finals in in school suspension, but feeling proud of myself
>friend invites me to party during the summer
>being a part-time stonerfag i accept with the promise of weed
>ex is there, and i'm stoned
>her boyfriend doesn't know she's here, and doesn't approve of alcohol/drugs
>don't give a fuck, gonna dance with her
>she grinds on me, we dance for what seems like forever
>after party i offer to walk her home
>on the way she drunkenly kisses me multiple times, telling me that she still loves me
>we get to her house and she says we should get back together
>being the weak bitch i am i say yes
>couple days later she tells me she broke it off with her boyfriend
>go to park next day with her and group of friends
>hanging out sitting on a bench when i see her kissing some other dude, not her ex
>go home and play pokemon
>we stop talking, rearange my schedule so i don't have to see her at school
>halfway through school year she moves in with her dad
>never have to see her again
>one of her old friends tell me that she cheated on me the whole time
>don't give a fuck because she's gone
>>680120239
getting over her took time, for a while i would dream about her almost every night, some nights i still do. looking back i realize how toxic she was, and it took years before she stopped contacting me on different social media platforms to try and reconnect after one of her break ups. it's a pretty shitty story, but she used to be the reason i would come to these threads and find those people who had a worse experience than i did. i just want all you guys to be happy, and i don't want anyone to make the same beta mistakes i did.
>>680118640
That was a hefty vent, and I've never pursued another girl since. Thanks for listening.
>>680083524
Glad to hear dude. Things get better
>>680119795
I started going to the gym again, started running, eating healthier and all that stuff. I didn't miss Evie; she was no longer there, but neither was her sadness and distress. I made a move on the stylist after a little while, but she'd been snatched up by someone else by the time I got around to that; probably for the best.
A month passed, then a few more. The band played more shows, my job started sucking less and things were okay. One night, I woke up at some insane hour and just couldn't sleep. I got up, started playing Fallout 3, made a little snack and at some point that night, it just hit me HARD. She'd cared so much for everyone else and tried to be a good person; she didn't really have anyone in her corner though. I was, for a time. I was selfish though and wanted things my way. I started missing her more and more, started losing sleep over her and started remembering all the times I wasn't good enough, when she was TOO good. I missed her more and more, with the passing of time.
Now, at thirty three, I still miss her. I tried to reconnect with her, but she's not interested in that. She's much happier than I remember though; university is going well, she's made a lot of friends and she just looks better. I think I was part of the problem and when I shed her, she started to shed a piece of her sadness.
I hope she keeps going, honestly. I made a really, really big mistake when I pushed her away and I regret that a whole lot. I see our mutual friends now and then, they all say she's doing well and looks better than she has in a long time.
She just cared so much, had such a huge compassionate, warm heart. Its amazing how I just failed to realize how important that really is and how much I needed that.
>>680118479
you gotta be independent of her, she will just ruin your life again
>>680119396
Ahh be me, 17 year old dummy. Only care about gaming, watching sports on TV and breaking bad. Girl enters life one day.
Cute smile, same music taste.. instantly falls in love. After a while admits she has a crush on me too. Continues for a while until she says she can't have a relationship because of her past experiences. Still be friends. Wake up to her smiling selfies on snapchat every morning. Still very much in love.
Until one day I found out one of my closest friends started dating her. Skip 3 months utter depression, failing classes, anger problems at everyone. She finally "reveals" she was dating him...and he broke up with her.
I mend her up again, take care of her, never leaves her side until one day we reveal once again that... we have a crush on each other. Dummy me falls for it again. Came very close to dating until one day she revealed that her ex (who she ditched me for) took her virginity, left her battered. Again I mend her, give her all my attention. So in love and nothing else matters.
Skip 1 month, she reveals it can't work because of her studies. "Can't date anyone...". Leaving me depressed. Still haven't gotten over it. Never will.
>>680083175
She's super androgynous and amazingly sexy. We both have Mohawks. She loves playing with my hair. I love playing with her hair. We're fucked up and just want to be stable and to lean on each other and feel okay. That's all we need and she gives me more than that. Find someone I hope you find someone who makes you feel like you're gonna be okay /b/ros
Which one you want to hear about?
My heartbreak or my hopeful?
>>680121113
heartbreak
>>680121113
both
>>680119930
Oh yeah I forgot to mention, this was pretty significant. I saw on Instagram she ended up dating that frat guy. Fucking rough.
>>680121678
Heartbreak was rough man.
Her name is Justine.
I met her in my latin class the first day of my freshmen year in high school.
She was a "scene girl" who swore she wasn't emo which was quite frankly a lie.
I was entranced at first sight.
She was a fucking adorable and i was a sucker for any unique looking girl.
I got to know her really well sophomore year. She used to borrow my phone to text people and we'd pass endless notes in class.
She told me she was the first person she felt completely comfortable opening up to and over the next couple years I became the person that knew her best.
She was the most precious person i had ever met. Before her i'd never known someone with a dark and traumatic past.
She'd been molested super young by an uncle, tried to kill herself when she was 6 by drinking some cleaning shit and there were plenty of other attempts after that...one that broke me.
Mid way through sophomore year she got hooked on coke and subsequently raped by her dealer.
She wouldn't give me his location so i dropped it.
Mid way through junior year she told me she was running away from home, got caught, and sent to a mental institution.
When she finally got out her psychosis had done her so dirty she was terrified she was still in there and her life was being locked in a room in the institution while she was rejecting her reality and projecting her world around her...
Basically i knew her really well and she actually got me to open up a bit.
I had completely forgotten that i had been raped when i was younger but when she described her abuse it all flooded back to me minus the dirty parts my psyche gracefully protects me from remembering.
>>680090058
Holy shit someone screencap this. I would but I'm on mobile. With that though I'm happy for you anon. That's an incredible story, thanks for sharing.
>>680090058
holy shit, that is fucked man
damn :(
ironic I got this captcha
>>680122962
not everything needs to be immortalized
this is 4chan
>>680123203
I agree, the fact that these posts will likely be lost in time, like tears in the rain, is an important part of the feels thread.
She broke up with me, definitely, she was with someone else for a month, she just told me. I'm destroyed, i dont know what uim doing, im lost, i feel like i've lost everything, i really dont know anymore, i cant take it she was my world
>>680123203
True. I guess it's up to op if he wants it screencapped or not.
>>680122841
She went to a new school so we had to talk via technology and when she got a new boyfriend i just kinda let her go.
She'd never really seemed much more interested in me short the occasional wave of lust and i only wanted something real with her.
A year passed and she broke up with her boyfriend and started texting me again.
Things had gotten worse while she was with him.
She'd gone off to college and secluded herself so that he was basically the only person in her life.
She was socially crippled and her psychosis hadn't improved let alone her depression.
She told me she loved me.
I broke down and confessed my love for her.
Told her how i had thought of her every day since we'd met, how she'd made me understand myself better and my God how fucking attractive she was to me.
We had a cute little puppy love stage in our romance but after a few weeks I realized she wasn't actually talking to me she was just saying things.
She'd completely shut me off from the truth of her reality and was playing me soft on her surface, but i knew her too well and would ask and probe and eventually beg her to just talk to me.
She would lie, i would let her know it was okay, she could tell me the truth
It fucked her up because she couldn't fake it for me.
We battled like this for months, me begging in tears for her to be open with me and her telling me she couldn't...i was an idiot.
I pushed her.
I should have been gentle and let her take her time with it...but i missed her so much over the year, now that i had her back in my life her keeping me at such a shallow distance while engaging with intimate conversations and very very sexy conversations was fucking torture for me.
>>680123537
fuck that stupid bitch
how can you still be sappy about her knowing that she was a dirty cheating bitch the whole time?
figured id post here just because; a bit different than breakups.
I think I have some severe depression or something that's been getting worse over the past few years.
First I couldn't do well in uni no matter what I did.
Then I stopped showing up for class.
Then I stopped getting up at any semblance of daytime. I slept (and still do sleep) for 12+ hours a day.
Dropped out, figured I should get a job because I was just stressed out from the work at uni.
8 months later and almost nothing has changed.
I have all these people around me who have such high hopes for me, and yet such little expectations. But I can't even live up to those low as shit standards.
The more I try to get help from people around me the harder it becomes. Every time I attempt to communicate just how severe my problem actually is I just end up getting strangled by fear. I don't even know what I'm afraid of.
I have a girlfriend who loves me and I can't even begin to attempt to tell her, let alone anyone else. I only let the tiniest bit of this shit slip out when I try to get help, and it just results in people telling me I'm lazy or to stop goofing off.
As time goes on thoughts of suicide are increasing but I'm still fired up enough to be angry at it and dismiss them. But I'm tired, /b/. So tired. I only have so much rage to throw at myself before I burn out and actually take my life.
how the fuck do i get help
>>680123635
She'd call me up crying in the bathroom tormented by her thoughts just for me to calm her down and tell her i was real, and she was real...
She'd send me pictures of her bleeding wrists because it was the only thing she found beautiful in her life anymore.
Pain kept her sain she said...
She described cutting like a sponge for suffering.
At first it was sharp and harsh but as the pain faded, so did her mental anguish.
And we'd cry together and she'd start to feel alright again.
She stopped cutting and actually started having a healthy diet again and I suggested she feel free to talk to other guys as we were never officially together and I didn't want her to isolate herself to me like she had done in her previous relationship...then she met this guy Patrick.
im a shitty story teller but today just kinda hit me hard and im a loser so..
>8:00pm getting out of work
>text crush and ask if she wants to grab something to eat since im off early
>says yes
>ohfucknowwhatdoido
>9:00pm roll up to her house (i drive a long distance to work)
>go grab something quick to eat then some DQ drivethrough
>sitting on her porch swing talking about everything and i stutter around her a lot she knows its cause im a shy fucking
>"anon you really need to be more confident"
>we both have pretty low self esteem from previous shit and other relationships but w/e
>"yeah thats easier said than done you should know that"
>"yeah but thats why i stay single now. i dont want to just date any loser. im enjoying being single"
>try my best to hide the fact that it killed me
>0 chance of mission success
>>680123844
see if your insurance will cover visits with a therapist. when i was seeing one i was able to talk to him the same way i talk to /b/. it really does help to find the source of your depression and to take steps with a therapist to squash it
>>680106533
Go on
>>680083175
I don't see her often anymore, but when I do I get this feeling like she's always been a total stranger. When we had first gotten together she was real petite and extremely pretty. Not even 5 ft. she had to stand on her tiptoes to kiss me. Well, 7 years later she leaves me and then gets with my "best friend." Was feeling down in the dumps for a good while, but now I've got another girl in my life. But still, when I happen across my ex, she no longer has that gleam in her eye that attracted me so. Shes let herself go, and my god her face screams TIRED. I'd feel sorry for her if of course she hadn't also developed a "no time for sympathy" personality.
>>680106786
You have to take the lead, anon. You already went to prom with her. You should have asked her out first. I know that it's hard, but trust me, you HAVE to show interest. You're not going to get anywhere if you don't take a chance. If you wait too long anon, things slip past you. You never know how much time you have until you don't anymore.
>>680124108
Patrick was just her friend.
She had him deeply in the friend zone but she was a kind and precious caring little shit show...
That fuck told her he had cancer and was dying.
She'd sneak out of her house and walk 6 miles to see him and he'd ask her to role play with him like they were married and talk about their family together.
It was fucked up but she wouldn't let me get a word in other than I didn't like it but that she should do what she felt was right...being the concerned person she was the night before i went into a psychosis of myself, she went over to him again and he tried to force her into sex but she just wouldn't have it.
He said horrible things to her...called her so many names about her being cruel and heartless and to kill herself...
So she did.
I woke up that morning with a black snapchat that said goodbye.
I immediately knew and denied what i was seeing simultaneously.
The first two days i spent in solitary, mostly in the bathtub with the shower on trying to convince myself that she was just done with me.
I was too pushy, kinda clingy, and she had found a guy and just moved on
That became my story I repeated to myself over and over.
>>680090058
tnx man helped alot:)
>>680124266
i cant talk to a therapist; i can only say any of this stuff here because its so impersonal that its like bouncing ideas off a second brain or something rather than other people
i have lots of close friends from around the country that i only know online that are arguably closer than some of my real life friends, and i cant even tell them any of this shit
i need antidepressants or something before id be able to openly speak like this to somebody face to face
>>680124254
Anon, you fucker. What are you doing. That was a challenge to man up, get your confidence up and ask out on a real date. But by backing down, you only proved to her that you were any other loser. You HAD a chance of mission success, but now it is 0.
died a few years ago, never go to say goodbye, never told her what she meant to me, I feel broken and lost without her.
feelsbadman.jpg
>>680124941
Man you're scared of being judged. Even if your friends are online you still think if you told them about what's going on they'd think of you differently, and you want to keep your relationship with them the way it is. You shouldn't care what a psychologist/therapist thinks of you. It'll be like 4chan except with someone who can give you techniques and consistent feedback. I recommend it, not sure what other options there are anyways right?
>>680124676
The love of my life, the woman i had dreamed about, someone who had demanded a future with me and made me promise to never give up, and my only comfort was that she had gotten sick of me and left but a part of me knew it wasn't true and I rejected it and lost my sanity.
I sent her so many pathetic texts...I called her so many times.
I thought about reaching out to her family but i couldn't face the reality of her being gone so i just prayed and denied, prayed and denied until the end of the week until i came to the conclusion that i was happy at least i got a goodbye.
Then i get a text from her.
The silly little bitch had swallowed every pill in the house and ended in the hospital to have her stomach pumped then didn't text me back for two days because she didn't know how to face me.
I honestly didn't know how to handle it.
My heart was devastated.
That she would just leave me because some fuck said some shit to her made me so incredibly fucked I'm still fucked up about it just thinking of that moment.
It was the greatest relief i'd ever experienced matched with a dagger through my soul on top of my torn and ragged psyche after my weeknlong delving into insanity.
I thought i was dreaming so I started to hit myself until i believed i was in reality and then i went off on her asking her how could she do that to me while comforting her, asking if she was okay, and saying everything was okay, begging her again to just please talk to me.
I blamed myself for not being harder on her and forcing her to talk to me again like we used to.
That she could just get so low and not come to me was my own personal defeat.
>>680124941
Also antidepressants aren't some panacea, you should try talk therapy first. Medication has draw backs, but should be kept as an option if therapy isn't super effective.
>>680124941
>>680125253
if you need antidepressants a therapist/psychologist is the person who is going to give them to you. being afraid of judgement just makes getting over depression that much harder
>>680125556
A psychiatrist can only prescribe. A psychologist may recommend it, but therapy would likely be the initial route. Just from having people close to me take SSRIs I'm biased towards hoping people benefit from therapy and don't have to take pills.
>>680107788
There's only one way to find out, anon. Ask her out on a date. If she says no it won't destroy your friendship. But if you don't do anything then you're just going to be wondering "what if" for the rest of your life. The girl is not going to be the one who asks you out. That's your job. You don't need to ask to be facebook official boyfriend girlfriend right off the bat. Just say "Hey, I was wondering if maybe you wanted to go to [restaurant, movie, picnic, whatever the fuck]. Like, on a date." You gotta risk it to get the biscuit, man. Make sure you specify it's a date, especially if you have some kind of friendship thing already going on. If she says no to you, you'll be no farther from having her than you are now.
>>680124966
no it wasn't
it was the complete opposite
some guys I swear smh
>>680125442
We were both wrecks.
I was fucking batshit.
I went in between feeling incredibly happy just to snap back into immense pain.
My head killed me, my heart felt like it was seizing up for weeks.
Her and i cooled things off a bit and got back into our regular streak of miscommunication again when one night we snuck out because she wanted to have sex...which we had never had because I was always that sad silly romantic dead set on abstinence not for religious reasons, but out of principle or something...idfk how to explain it but i just didn't want to have sex, but that night we both did.
It was like a miracle.
It was going to fix everything.
We found a nice park, stripped down, and kissed each other.
I went down on her...she tasted so sweet...but the whole time she felt fucking empty.
It was like she wasn't even there.
It was worse when she moaned because my instincts kicked in and I realized she was faking for me...she didn't really want it, and that meant I definitely didn't want it.
I was so fucking painfully flacid she was embarrassed and we just kinda out our clothes on and left.
I dropped her off at her place and she drifted away after asking me for a nude, complimenting my dick and asking for another chance and i begged her that we actually get to know each other again...like settle down and be at peace woth each other so we could do it right and both enjoy it but she just drifted off while I manically and desperately tried to keep her in my life.
One week she disappeared and went to another state with some emo looking faggot...she blocked my number while she did and forgot she had until i messaged her on Facebook.
It was pathetic...i was so desperate and she just kept stringing me along and even though i knew she was lying i was just trying to believe we could still be together.
>>680083175
She is still the love of my life....
She was physically aggressive to me...
She bought condoms without telling me and I found the opened box in her drawer...
She mistreated me...
But...she was the only one giving me the attention, the understanding I need..she was always there for me...
>>680125253
>>680125448
im just very reluctant to do therapy because i used to do it when i was younger for unrelated and unnecessary reasons (what shit luck that I might actually need it now, right?) and talking to them seemed useless for me
that and the fact that i already find it hard to keep doing menial things makes it difficult for me to make an attempt to try and get help in the first place
i have nobody to keep me going or keep me on track so everything just falls apart while i get berated for being lazy ad infinitum
but ill take this advice to heart and hope that my previous experience with therapy was just shit because of a shit therapist, thank you anons
>>680126058
She was saying that you need to be more confident. That she doesn't want to date just any loser. She was saying that she was interested in you, but wasn't willing to try it if you didn't get more confidence. And then you showed her you had none. Seems very straightforward to me.
>>680084074
Bump.
>>680126527
I'm not that anon btw
it wasn't some mind game from her to get him to be confident, it was pretty apparent she wasn't interested in him
it's kinda retarded to infer from that that she WAS into him
smh
>>680126180
The last time i messaged her was October 6th.
I pushed.
She blocked me.
I'm still getting over her but I'm pretty much done.
It used to be so bad every time i heard the word "she" or "her" she popped into my mind but now i have hopeful to replace that void.
I know I'm not totally mentally sound, i even had a mental institution visit of my own but I'm a lot better.
Life is still a daily struggle though and it's not even because of her, I'm just incredibly depressed often...but i found life worth living and I won't be giving up.
I did a fucking number on myself but I figure if i did it to myself it's just a matter of time and psychological conditioning before I'm totally okay again.
If i did it to myself, i can undo it to myself.
My heart still aches when i see black floral dresses though and i can barely look at porn without something reminding me of her...
I hate it so much that she's so deep in my fucking head...
I'm sorry this was so poorly written guys there's just so much to it i had to leave a lot out and I'm a fucking wreck right now.
>>680126759
Like if you ever meet a girl, and you find a way for every song you hear to be about her, your daily thoughts are plans with her in the future and how you can make her happier, when your mind drifts into her no matter what subject people are talking about and work is just a devotion to your and her future...just keep a distance until you know she feels the same for you.
Honestly even without the suicide i know i'd have still been about as fucked up as i am just because of how deeply i had turned my world into being for her.
Don't do it guys, it's not worth it to write a storybook romance by trying to be perfect for someone who isn't trying for you.
>Me
>Day 1: "She seems cool, she's not like most grills at this school"
>Day 20someshit: "Fuck I can't stop thinking about her, damn it dude I'm going to ask her out!"
>Yes
>MFW I ShitABrick.jpeg
>Date Night: Compatible
>AM LUCKIEST DUDE EVER
> 3 MONTHS LATER TIME CARD
>Mood changes, she's acting different
>Ignore it
>One month later
>Thinks about her ex "sometimes"
>FML
>She: Anxiety
>Me: Cheer you up, fam
>Max out card/No money
>Month:6
>She:Can't stop thinking about ex
> FUCK VIC! (ex)
>Break Up
>"I still want to be friends"
>Please Kill Me.gif
>TwoMonthsLater
>Find out my own cousin tried to fuck her
>FAGGOT BLOCKS ME ON FAGBOOK
>I'M GOING TO KILL THAT FUCKER AND VIC ONE DAY
>KILLMYSELF.doc
>FUCK EVERYONE
TL;DR: OP IS CANCER FAG
>>680083175
I have been after a girl for about three years and she suddenly got a boyfriend, I told her how I felt but I was too late. I would be alright with it if I knew the guy was a better man than me but I don't know him and I feel cheated because if I had just been more proactive about telling her how I felt I know she would have gone out with me.
>>680106533
go on ya shit I am now emotionally invested in this
EMERGENCY BUMP
I don't know if I want to cry because she's not here or smile because she was here.
TACTICAL BUMP
Masturbation is the only joy in my life. It has envolped me and now I do it more like 5 times a day and it gets in the way of things.
What are some easy ways to find a decent amount of joy legally?
>>680098412
What's your story anon?
>>680106533
plz keep writing anon, I am too emotionally invested in finishing your story.
>>680117041
Give it a try, he should understand, and if he feels something serious towards u, then he will even suffer worse pain just to keep u close.
Had same w/ girl that i love, she wanted to keep me on distance not to hurt me, she abandoned me in 2014, and i couldn't stand being without her, for 2 months while being alone all i wanted was bottle of buzz, and painkillers.
U might be the best thing that could have ever happen to him.
Give it a try, without trying how can u say that something will go wrong? Something happened in the past, so what? Maybe he is the one
Good luck, keep your head up, and show him your smile
>>680130147
exercise man
