Ask a psychologist anything.
I'm h-here for you Anonymous!
>>676901135
What is the purpose of MY life ?
>>676901288
There is none. You make your own meaning in life.
Why did you become a psychologist?
How do pass time at work when there's literally nothing to do?
>>676901135
What's your training?
(Don't say psychoanalysis... don't say psychoanalysis...)
I think I found your facebook
>>676901343
Like when i want to have sex... i just have sex ?
>>676901135
how do you get over being forgotten by someone you can not forget?
>>676901432
Generally, I read 8 bit theater:
http://www.nuklearpower.com/2001/03/02/episode-001-were-going-where/
>>676901516
Yes.
>>676901481
Okay?
>>676901591
You forget them right back!
>>676901649
This it?
>>676901591
What if you forget who you're supposed to be forgotten by.
>>676901758
That's my logo; I haven't touched that account in something like five years though.
*downloads*
>>676901775
Stuff changed.
>>676901903
Oh gotcha
dem feelz...
>>676902279
*hugs tightly* It'll be okay Anonymous. It won't hurt forever.
>>676902279
Fag
>>676902279
That is disappointing.
>>676902468
Good morning Mokou. Not a very fast thread today.
Why couldn't the Knicks teams of the '90s get past the Jordan-led Bulls?
>>676901288
>>676902596
Because it had Jordon on the team. Duh.
>>676902618
I prefer dogs.
>>676901135
I love my psychologist. He keeps giving me drugs i can abuse the shit out of for fun.
>>676902279
Don't worry, she'll be fine..
>>676902544
Slow, much like life.
>>676902766
A psychologist cannot prescribe drugs. That's a psychiatrist.
>>676902832
Move to NYC; much faster pace, I guarantee it. I almost can't keep up.
>>676901135
How would I convince my niece to have sex with me? Any subliminal messages I can sneak into her tiny delicious mind?
>>676901135
How do you explain ambivalent feelings ?
Like when you love a girl so much you want to have kid with her and everything but also want to watch her fry alive in oil
>>676901135
What does it say about my psychological Health if i masturbate to pic related? Also,could you tell me why the fuck it turns me on?
>>676902832
You draw this character yourself?
>>676901135
Was it by choice you didn't opt for a doctorate in medicine, or is it because your worthless sense of altruism held you back? Either or, it must be such a thorn in your side.
>>676902797
The Aids?
>>676902884
Then what the fuck is a psychologist?
>>676903111
It's alright little Billy, go play with the worms in the garden.
How would you deal with someone who have an eating disorder and also cut himself?
>>676902919
No, those don't work.
>>676903047
It's really not; I'm a programmer now, so I make plenty of money and use my knowledge to predict human behavior for the financial markets.
I'm content; I'll go back eventually.
>>676902987
Gore doesn't really imply any specific mental illness. You enjoy it because of random input during your childhood years that sparked clusters of neurons to fire. That's all.
>>676902947
What do you mean? Humans are capable of holding inconsistent feelings because a neural network doesn't really give a shit about consistency. That's all there is to it.
>>676903111
Someone who actually talks to you and helps, rather than prescribing drugs.
>>676903121
Seek medical attention.
>>676902884
I am not a huge fan of big cities.
>>676902990
No, my drawing skills are not good enough to really draw anything.
>>676903100
Too bad you got it too, because she's in love with the balck guy for one year already.
Don't cry your heart out anon, and please don't think about what she will do to him in the bed. All the crazy stuff you only heard about..
Oh well, cheer up.
>>676903262
Generally eating disorders are related to anxiety or lack of self esteem. I'd try to fix that to solve the problem completely.
>>676903286
I was lost in the city, alone in the hills....
>>676901135
i'm drunk?
>>676903264
I thought that was a therapist wtf is going on.
>>676901135
Do you think psychology can be studied as a science?
>>676903449
And how? For example, cheering her up, or making complements or what?
Where can I get a nickel to ask you questions?
>>676903211
>>676903522
Seems you need to read a book, Anonymous.
>>676903558
I think...it can't...be studied any other way? That'd be philosophy of psychology or just meta physics.
Admittedly, since psychology is relatively young, a lot of the older people studying it were more philosophers than scientists, but today we don't really have that problem.
>>676903593
No no no. You aren't qualified. Get her to seek medical attention.
>>676903623
Always lots by a laundromat in my experience.
Should I continue studying psychology?
>>676901135
>ITT: two semester student is tyring to give out advice
>>676903449
>Generally eating disorders are related to anxiety or lack of self esteem.
Or by a lot of expectations and pressure in the family. Or by abuse.
Could be anything you retard, that's why psychologists do an anamnesis first.
Oh, that hubris..
>>676903721
If you already started, not much use in stopping.
>>676903758
All of which are....sources of....anxiety. Good work; you've insulted someone trying to help, and merely confirmed their assessment.
>>676903678
Don't call me a nigger you cock goblin.
>>676903678
How do i overcome lazyness and procrastination?
>>676903838
I call em how I see em.
>>676903865
seconded
>>676903865
The simplest way is to have better time management.
Get a journal, and write down a list of things you NEED to do. Write a schedule that prioritizes the smallest, easiest to do things first. Then follow the schedule.
Do that every day for 10 weeks, and you'll not be a procrastinator anymore!
>>676903678
Do you think there's a perfect human condition then? It just seems to me that human behaviour is cultured, like art. I don't see how you can study something as a science which can't be pinned down causally.
>>676901135
Why do I feel the need to masturbate all the time?
>>676904034
That sounds stressful.
>>676901288
Can I have this Pepe?
>>676904034
actually, I can vouch for this. I schedule helps out a lot more than it should. plus it'll get you into a routine for getting shit done.
>>676903873
ok if you're really a psychologist then what am i thinking?
>>676901343
>Implying existential nihilism is objectively correct.
Normally I'd say it's very unprofessional to say something like that to someone from a position of authority, but this is 4chan, and anon is probably fucking around, so yeah how do I tell my parents I'm gay?
>>676901135
>psychologist
>psychiatry in image
You clearly dont know the difference so I call bs, timestamp with proof or gtfo.
>>676904243
Peanuts
>>676904107
I mean, maybe you should open a psychology book then.
>>676904170
If you are stressed out by such a simple thing, contact a doctor; you need beta blockers or sedatives.
>>676904233
By opening your mouth and saying "Mom, Dad, I'm gay".
>>676904243
It's a reference to Peanuts, an old comic series. Get some culture in you.
>>676904222
check'd
>>676903825
>All of which are....sources of....anxiety.
Now shit sherlock..
"EVERYTHING IS ANXIETY. makes 200 dollars, now fix your self esteem."
What does this even mean?
You think someone who got raped needs the same advice as someone who always felt under pressure by his father?
Don't you think someone close to suicide needs probably a littel bit of stabilization first, instead of good advice?
I knew someone who slit her arms because it made her "feel herself again" and getting relief from the stuff in her head, which is differnt from someone who want to destroy himself or even kill himself.
Things are not that easy and those "mainstream psychology" answers are not worth anything.
>>676904222
I think you are thinking "Wow I just got trips!"
>>676901135
Why do I switch from having a warrior personality then periods of destitution and feeling completely lost and worthless
TLDR: straight Lion one day ~ pussy bitch the next
>>676904490
I'm a psychologist, not a therapist. I don't make 200 dollars like that.
>>676901135
Card tricks or coin tricks?
>>676904490
fucking this.
>>676904546
Because you try to contextualize yourself as a fucking warrior and you AREN'T.
Just live your life; stop trying to imagine you are something you aren't.
>>676904331
Scheduling just makes me feel stressed because then I feel bad when I don't meet the deadlines I've set for myself. That's why I just to prefer to do things as I go
>>676904658
And how does that work out for you, Mokou?
blah blah blah meditation post
>>676904331
Please don't tell me this is the first time someone has suggested to you psychology isn't a science? It's not an insult mate.
>>676904718
It's about the ten thousandth since I've started running these threads. It kinda IS an insult, actually.
Anything is, if you repeat it enough.
There's this friend I have that I am pretty ok with, but I cannot stand the fact that she's getting into a lot of trouble because of how her mind works around problems.
She's pretty much a compulsive liar through and through, not in a good way, not in a bad way. She lies for stupid shit, she lies to herself. Even when there's proof right in front of her of something, she keeps lying about it. And the worst is, she looks like she doesn't understand what's wrong half of the time. Sometimes she will admit that something she says is false and retract her statement, then the next day she'll go back to her own little lie.
And the worst of it is, so far the person that suffers the most is her, anything that she can influence with her lies keeps hitting her back, and she keeps asking herself why. After 3 years of knowing her, I tried to reason with her yesterday because she's in a lot of trouble with her family. She told me something along the lines of "ever since I started being truly sincere 2 years ago, I haven't had anything but problems" but the truth, the real truth of it is, she never changed.
So I'm trying to wrap my head around this whole subject, how someone can keep lying to himself and perceive things differently. And how to help her be straight with it. In most cases her lies cover up things along the lines of "I'm fine with this situation" when she's really not.
>>676904689
So far I have not really missed deadlines set by others even if it did require pulling all nighters
I have a fantasy world inside my head and imaginary friends I'm close too. I've never told anyone, not even my psychologist. They have names and personalities and they've been there a couple years. *normalcy intensifies*
>>676904793
That's a pathological liar; she needs medical help.
You can't help her.
>>676904856
You need to tell your psychologist.
>>676901135
What is the independent variable in the experiments of Standford?
What model should i pick for a quasi experimental experiment with descreptive test ex post facto , an anova or an ancova?
>inb4 I am an introspectivist piece of shit who think Andrew Weiss is 100% serious
Protip, you are ;)
Real student of conductual neuroscience here.
>>676903264
You say using a macroscopic (anthropomorphic) approach to explain inconsistency in the human mind is useless because everything boils down to the analysis of neural network ?
Then I reformulate, how do you explain the formation of antagonist pattern in a neural network ? Because if I follow your train of thoughts an idea is acquired through a learning process by encrypting information in a biological hardware.
More precisely love-hate mechanisms.
>>676904034
Once again you don't fucking know what you are talkign about.
>>676903865
Lazyness and procrastination can have many differnt causes. Sometimes you just need to make more specific targets (instead of "I'll do it somehow"):
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/SMART_criteria
Sometimes it has to do with a lack of motivation. Can be even be depression. Or maybe you don't really identify with what you are doing and only do it because you feel supposed to? Think about what are teh things you can't get done.
Ther's a lot of approaches, you could try out stuff like "emotional freedom technique", meditation, or "structured procrastination".
Or if you don't feel like it's an emotional problem, try you project management stuff (to do lists, "things done" list, eisenhower box).
>>676904927
As both a psychologist with a focus in neuropharmapsychology, and a computer scientist, I can tell you, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that we don't know that yet.
Sorry! Neural networks are hard and behave strangely and non-linearly/non-locally.
>>676904947
Congrats, you took my advice and....uhh, made it harder to understand. gg.
>>676904777
I don't think it's an insult. Like art, psychology goes way beyond science as far as I'm concerned.
Can I get a number 2 with a coke pls. Oh and may I substitute fries with onion rings?
I was raped and forced to dress as a girl every summer from age 11 - 13. Time skip 6 years later I cant get off unless im bound up and dressed as a girl while im getting fucked and i hate my self because of it, wat do?
>>676905111
You can be wrong all you like.
>>676905114
I make about a quarter of a million a year; my taxes were on the order of 40K USD this year.
So I get all my food off grubhub, my glib glop!
>>676904777
Waste of trips. If you are psychologist I am the king of England you piece of shit. If I say 44, Broca and Washoe what do you say?
If you cant answer this you are a proven fraud or a freud.
Dont know what is worst.
>>676905238
Thank god for programming.
Anyway, got to go to work guys.
I'll see you again at 7-730PM EST
With love
>>676904560
Intersting pictures.
Violent, but subtle.
Have you ever thought about doing martial arts do fix that anger issues? It's not good to keep that anger contained inside, let it out.
>>676905320
Too kek
A small update on homeless brit anon:
I don't talk with him that much anymore. He seems to have found a supprt network somewhere. He worked for his friend's uncle for a while, but the work ran out and he's now trying to find something else.
He fears fears that his depression might catch him if he works something he dislikes. I told him that any work brings experience and that he should work something to get forward in life.
He's been taking a lot of walks and a lot of naps too.
I'll try talking with him al little more, but he's trying to save on his phone bill.
>>676904902
You are a joke.
If someone that is your mother but in fact is a suplantation of your real mother with a cap and is cutting the grass with the mowlaner where is the paradox?
Anyone who has studied afective syndromes could answer this easily
>>676905238
K. Don't bother making any assertions or anything, thought that's what scientists did. Obviously I'm wrong.
>>676901135
I know you arent a psychiatrist but im 31 and want an addy script. What kind of trigger words or phrases are they listening for to give it out?
>>676905095
I'm interested in machine learning and artificial neural network and I'm starting to see some limits for the application to neurosciences (not my field of study anyway)
Do you think one day neurosciences will overcome the current explanation psychatrists are using for ambivalent feelings/antagonist pattern ?
>>676905095
>Congrats, you took my advice and....uhh, made it harder to understand. gg.
Wow, why so defensive?
I said it COULD be a time management issue.
But it could also be an emotional problem.
Or even something related to Internalization, maybe anon is doing something he doens't really want, deep down inside.
I'm not saying that you are wrog with everything, but you oversimplify it.
You're like a doctor that says "OK, you got a runny nose. You have the flu."
Yeah, COULD be. But could be a lot of stuff..
We need to look at the peopel behind it, not just take a random definition from ICD-10 that seems to fit and give some generic advice.
LISTEN to those guys you are trying to help..
Goddamn.
>>676905400
Dubs of truth get answer from real psychofag majoring in conductual neuroscience.
The 44 area of broca is the one designed for language. And washoe was one of the first apes in develop some kind of sign language. They are a constant reference in every single manual. Any questions will be answered with facts. And grammar faults. Excuse me but i m.russia
Or you can ask the other for being a special snow flake.
>>676902797
Answer is "Not enough".
Indeed, she feels it not enough. Not like with me.
>>676905095
If you have a major in neuropsychology and refeer to neural patterns when asked about feelings you have totally proofed to me that the closest you have been to a DSM is in the clinic of your autismo teacher. But once more I will give you a riddle.
What triangle without one side has in common Cocaine and Weed?
>>676905233
someone fix my brain ok
>>676903449
Thats a manual ciclotimia caused by a type 2 bipolarity with and eating disorder wich enmask it. Could be supressed giving lithium and Y peptide and therapy.
Real psychofag goes balls deep in autismo imposter
>>676906415
If this real you migh have in order.
Sexual dimorfity
>sorry I russia so not really good translation in my language dimorfismo sexual
Continuing
Post traumatic stress disorder
Fixation fetish related to power abuss
And if you can get hard and cum.. I would make my bet and say type 1 of bipolarity and some anxiety or in the other hand if you take it in the ass and dont cum probably somo esquizo latent shiet.
Wat do?
>go to hospital/family doctor/clinique
>refeer your health problems to this in the most aseptic, calmed and humble way
>you will be refereed to a psychiatrist and a psychologist
>probably free, so you have to be absolutely sincere and honest. Give details
>relax and let them work for you in you to be a better person :>
In thwe other hand.....
>if you dont do this when you grow older or change habits your brain will do weird shiet
>you could turn into a psichotic esquizo
>probably with pseudo hallucinations
>probably if untreated a very interesting case in the future
>go to doctor nao or you will pay for the lamborghini of a great amount of people :_)
Real psychofag here. Any other questions?
>>676904856
>>676907312
What about me?
I hate psychologists
How do I be less nervous when talking to people?
>>676901135
Why do I pee/ejaculate in cups and bottles why am I sexually attracted to things I shouldn't B/ ages/animals
>>676901135
I've got the best job I've ever had, plenty of extra cash, live with a girl I love, I'm able to do anything I want to do when I want to, e.g play games, play sports, whatever, but, I constantly feel like shit, never want to do anything, and make up excuses to get out of doing anything. What the hells wrong with me please?
>>676904856
Damn...you are a really good case. Dont worry too much but well...it is not usual. Answer this question while I check a few notes becouse I had a case in psychopathologie exact to yours.
>describe briefly your family and relation with it
>same goes for friends
>do you work study or do sport?
>Do you have fights with the imaginary ones?
>hallucinations? Drugs alchohol and others?
>>676907824
>doesn't find pleasure in activities you would normally enjoy
>not motivated
Sounds like depression
Do you feel numb, anon?
>>676907824
You are tired. No joke. Have a vacation only for you and the people who doesnt ask you anything. Chill. Get loaded. Read a book and go to.movies.
Yes, the real psychofag
>>676908053
I'm not sure if I would say numb...I can enjoy some things, an do still laugh every now and then at tv shows or something...but everything else, I don't feel fussed about.
How would one deal with depression?
>>676908207
I actually went to the doctor recently due to tiredness, they took my blood and I'm waiting for the results
>>676908025
I'm a domestic violence victim my mom and her boyfriend constantly argue and he would verbally attack me (both are bipolar) also have 3 younger children in the house
Social anxiety so not many friends but the ones I have are alright
I don't really do anything. Not motivated to.
No, I don't fight with them.
I used to have psychosis a couple years back...auditory and visual hallucinations
>>676908356
Well I have depression and I take meds but that doesn't help me
Giving life value is the key to happiness so if you find something to be passionate about you should feel better.
Do you have any hobbies or passions?
>>676908687
a few years ago I used to be a semi-pro boxer, I started up again last year, but had to stop 7 months ago due to a job change
iku pls...
>>676908404
Then man you have already the answer. It is not the problem. It is the cause.
>check for bipolar
>try to leave your house even if it means a psychiatric ward
>you might have persistent depression major or initiating chronic depression
>also if physical abused you can have and affective syndrome from A to Z
>we can check man.. but dude you should go to doctor inmediatly and ask for help
>imaginary friends are a conductual exit. It could be God, drugs, binge sex or fighting but you do better with imagination
I would suggest you to read books, do sports and if you can start studying.
And once again. Doctor. Nao.
Not tomorrow or next week. This afternoon. If you find and excuse today you will find it too tomorrow.
Everyday you dont ask for help it will mean more help needed. Every single day you struggle to get out of the shit you will be a thousand times better and cleaner.
If you have.been in the shiet for ten years you have a ton of it to clean. Start now.
Godspeed you /b/ro
Pd repeat with me. Go to doctor/hospital. Find help. Get better. Work. Study. If not, read , workout. Live.
If not. You know the results.
Btw one last thing. Every single thing you do will make you win. If you do it for winning. Lets work. Move nao
Is foot fetish a thing I should be afraid of or should I embrace it? Haven't told anyone except my former gf - until a few days ago.
>>676909262
Did you feel this way then?
If not, then maybe you could either
A)find a new hobby
B)make time to box even if you can't as a job
>>676909680
I moved from my dads to my mothers
My dad doesn't yell and argue but he has a kid with my stepmom that is spoiled af and I hate her guts
She's a controlling bitch and he's pussywhipped
That's why I moved here but I hate both places
>>676909680
I go to my psychologist this Friday btw
>>676909820
well i've always kinda felt like I never wanted to do anything. everything i've ever done has always been cause i've HAD to do it, you know? I've felt like this since I left education and had to become an adult
Make sure to say hello to them.
>>676901135
Anyone who actually get anything out of talking to a psychologist is pretty much weak and retarded and should be shot.
>>676910600
Well meds don't work for me but you could try it
Or smoke weed
>>676910763
I don't think those are long term solutions though lol, thanks anyway
>>676910936
Well I can't even deal with my own depression haha but I know how it feels, anon
>>676911006
it's bad man, don't even had a libido any more. I'm constantly turning my gf down for sex, and I dont even wanna fap
>>676911368 http://www.webmd.com/depression/guide/depression-types
>>676911368
Depression can make you sad or emotionless
Not finding pleasure in activities you normally enjoy
Not motivated
Depression also goes hand in hand with OCD and anxiety
Why is it that when I finally get a girl to like me I lose interest in her?
>>676901135
Are you Alice-chan from way back?
If you are then you convinced be to come out to my parent.
>>676901135
>psychologist
>That is not even real science
>Might as well go to a gypsy
>>676901135
Hi, society suck, capitalism suck, i hate how people lie about how "productivity" is great and how it makes them feel good and complete,i hate how people refuse to see that they are slaves , i'm having a good college degree and i may have a good job and a good pay but i feel bad Beeing part of such a fake society ... I doesnt want to be rich or wealthy ... I'd rather live a dangerous / out of legallity life than keeping going this way ... I want to see the world burn ... Fuck society (do i have a problem ? Should i see a therapist ? Or embrace my wild side ? )
>>676914020
Same
I'm anprim
>>676913142
GYPSY STEAL YOUR SOUL
>>676914546
Does it mean i'm anprim too ?
>>676914020
>>676914546
u should probably read about existentialism and the science on free will
Why did you hesitate?
>>676914888
Depends
There are many different kinds of anarchy
They all mean no govt just different ways of going about it
>>676914888
>anprim
>labeling yourself on onions.
>
>>676901288
to love the lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul and with all your mind.
It is the greatest of the commandments.
>>676901135
I'm russian what i am to do?
>>676901135
how would I help myself from chronic porning and masturbation? I is pretty much took over my life.
>>676914940
I doesnt believe that slave can have free will, i doesn't really think that the capitalist world will let you have free will, ad are everywhere, propaganda too, We are enslaved, our body , mind and soul are enslaved because cupid people did set up a world like this one ans because a big mass of people accept it as the only way, refusing to embrace reality , refusing to live out of the standard that the propaganda teach. I hate the fact that We live in a undead humanity .... I'm not a big found of zombie apocalypse, because We are already leaving in one .... I want my Brain removed, I want to be part of the leviathan (but please, notice i love life, nature, love, violence and a lot of shit, i'm not depressed)
>>676915806
чизбургер
>>676915303
That was what my sarcasm was implying .... Oh wait i didnt use the ">" ... Should i call myself a cis trans mâle ?
I need to convince a potential roommate to live somewhere further away than they'd like to be from work. The appartments are cheap, modern and clean, it's just a long commute for them. They don't have a car and Telu on the bus. What can I do?
>>676916241
yes
>>676901135
Am I suffering a psychosis?
I am paranoid af and talk with myself from time to time
>>676916068
Are you foreign?
>>676901135
Why are you here giving free therapy? Has something goes horribly wrong in your life and you try to distract your mind from this?
>>676901135
Is pedo a curable illness ?
>>676916621i>>676916621
A anarchist can't be for reign bro ! ... No seriously, I dont Know what you mean by foreign, so i will clarify it : i'm not born on 4chan , and as my ponctuation ans use of accent show, english ( or American, cause you doesnt seem to be anything else) is not my main language
>>676917249
What is your first language?
I'll find a link for types of anarchy for you.
ITT suicidally depressed programming psycologist with new and improved reaction images. Now with less narcissism.
>why do I...?
Because you're lazy and ignorant. Go outside and read a book.
>>676901135
How to take away the gays? I've been suffering from it for a while
>>676917249 http://rationalwiki.org/wiki/Anarchism
>>676902990
game is yume nikki btw
>>676917461
Proudhon's language
>>676918460
Oh thanks
>>676919036
You cut off a rats dick??
>>676919277
Not just the dick
>Also
>>676919697
Also...?
