this is a memory that has to be shared with the world
this is the story of Goshko
pic related its him
the story starts a bit slow but bear with me
Was away for a couple of years and came back where i used to live
>be me
>be 13
>see the gang all happy to see me back
>decide to play soccer with them to celabrate and to catch up
>G shows up with his now best to be friend Denis
>Denis is cool and intelligent and hangs out with G cuz mostly he does Denis' biding
>and like a thuner from a clear sky he spits out something
>sais say a joke (in native "kaji shega be" )
>i tarted to tell him the first joke that comes to mind
>G casts interupt and flash backs "say a joke"
>i try a different joke and then he stops me there again with the same phrase "say a joke"
>whattheactualfuck.tar.gz
>in awe i have no idea what the actual fuck is happening
>Denis intervines and explains to me that i have to say litterally "a joke" ( shega be )
>shell shocked i am out of words the only thing that i could come up with is to say fuck no
>he insists
>threaten to beat the shit out of him
>when he spits it out again i charge at him
>then i discovered that he has another superpower
>he fucking runs like a horse - i cant fucking catch up with him
>me.exe has stopped running
>fucking exhausted
>gang sais that they tried but no1 can catch that nigger-of-a-kind fuck
>>674276146
this is the point where retardness builds up
>can't remember when
>one guy from the crew brakes his hand
>next day he has a cast
>crew calls broken hand guy the shaman
>shaman was really cool and simple man
>shaman was also as big as fuck and i mean not fat fucking huge
>when he showe next day he had a huge cast arround his already big arm
>his entire arm was casted almost to the shoulder
>then out of nowhere G fades onto the stage with Denis
>everything is cool cuz Denis is miring the cast so does G
>evryone is at this point talking with the shaman about other stuff (things that kids would be intrested at the age of 13-15 in te 90s )after a few questions regarding weater it hurts or not
>thunderstruck.gif
>it's been already good 10 minutes after the cast is no longer a subject of discusion and G drops A Question
>"did the doctor put the cast on you? "
>needless to say no body cared weather it is a doctor , nurse , a priest or some1 else and not to mention it was rather self explanatory
>we started bashing him with words and then more retarded questions came out
>questions that cannot be recreated in any scientific environment
>we felt obligated to beat the stupid shit out of him
>needless to say we did not catch him
>after this day every1 knew that this soccer monkey had another super power: to ask THE questions
should i cont ?
Still trying to figure out what happened in the first post
>>674277066
it is hard to figure out without help i needed some
litterally he wanted me to say "a joke" so he will be satisfied with his new insanity
>>674276751
little background storry regarding the gang
>G was a skinny litte creature just like elmo
>G had a little darker skin than the rest of us but couldn't be really branded even a gipsy and allways had the surprised look on his face like he rediscoveres the world every day
>Denis on the other hand was a little lard ball but was amazingly fast for such
>the sole reason why Denis and G were best friends is that they lived in the same part of the block
>we have 3 Martins
>The largest Marting we will call him Martin (cuz he is the biggest and he gets to keep his name)
>the shortest Marting was actually the oldest but he was nicknamed the flea
>the last Martin we called the sniper cuz he had glasses and was practically blind without them
>Sniper was related to George who we get to call Gogich
>Sniper and Gogich did not live in the block they lived in a house across our small streat
>every one of this nicknames come from the same person which was named Viktor
>Viktor and his best friend who we got to call Dog were total jerks
>there was this creature that strongl resembles Smeagol but the young years we get to call him the Gnome
>His parrents were super sized
>i mean they were slightly obease but damn they were tall and huge , his father was like the hulk
>so did Gnome grew up tall at the age of 7 he was 1.50 meters as high as most of us (by the age of 13 he was 1.75m high)
rethink this man we need more background info
I really don't understand anon
>>674277619
yeah but it is boring if i start from the start and it is hard to get a thread going :/
>>674277778
almost checked
he has a satisfaction from hearing the phrase "a joke" and presses others say it
>>674277483
>some1 from the gang has found a few kittens and sows them to us
>we go to see them
>they were in the patch of trees in front of the block
>we decide that we will take care of them
>though the day we cuddle and play with the kittens
>one of us bought some dry cat food
>luckily the kittens were old enough to eat
>everyone was there even Denis and G
>and G decides it is a good idea to see what the kittens eat
>he fucking eats a few grains of it
>he fucking likes it
>stupified one of the gang who comes up with the nicknames sais "are you a ricket" (refering to the medical condition rickets that deforms the bones)
>thus has been born a new type of insult for stupidity because one was really needed
>>674278510
>as time passes we discover that G likes to do things in his own way
>the entrance of the block had a locking door and G never ever carried a key or anything else for that matter with the exception of a socker ball
>G never leaves without a socker ball
>when he needed to go home for some reason or to ask for some money to get something from the shop the following happens
>G lives on the 7th floor with his grandma and grandpa
>G carefully positions himself under all the balconies
>G assumes a specific position like telegaph pole with his head leaning backwards
>then G starts shouting " GRAMMA , GRAMMA , GRAMMA... "
>G changes tactics if granny does not show on the window
>G starts to screach "GRANPA , GRANPA , GRANPA ..." (they were nice elderly people)
>G was restricted to those two tactics to open a door
>G switches between untill it is opened
>Some times G awakens the unholly wrath of uncle Ilko who is actually sleeping
>with a mighty intimidating shout of a dreadlord he banishes G from the land with some threats to dismember some limbs
>Ilko was no joke , he did bad things to people who disturbed him
>thus G banishe he forms an idea
>heisthinkingagain.jpeg
>he goes from the back side of the block and starts his song of door opening again
>"GRAMMA ,GRAMMA ,GRAMMA ,GRANPA , GRANPA , GRANPA ..."
>>674278876
>be verry hot summer
>be at late noon time early afternoon
>we are outside with the gang and playing socker
>the deathrays of the sun are weakening
>defeated by exhaustion and sun ray barrage we are hungry
>we head home in a group but something is not right
>there are no summoning screaches
>G has a key for the first time!
>some kind of cataclysm has happened to be a witnes of this event
>his Grandparents will be out the entire day
>i go gome in and out as fast as possible so we can continue and i am one of the first kids outside
>we wait soon the rest of them stream in in a good 10 minutes
>the only ones that are missing are G and Denis
>then Denis bursts out of the entrance laughing
>he explains why they took so long
>he actually ate at home and was quick so he went to see how G is doing
>G was sill busy making some food
>G is not used to forage for food for himself, the fridge jungle is a hostile place for him
>Denis explains that he was buttering some bread
>but it was not the fact that he was buttering bread slowly that was strange, but how he was doing it
>G was motherfocking using a SPOON instead of a knife to do it
>MFW he confirmed with a dead serious face
>we died laughing
>later that day we discovered that he was fapping by pulling the forskin on his dick instead of stroking it like a normal person
>>674279140
>this day the gang wants to make their own soccer field since the streets are no good
>constant hitting of cars and a few hoods were dented
>so Martin , Martin , Martin (yes we had 3 of em), George , G , Denis and I decide to go to the back side of the block and smother some tall ass grass so it can be playable
>the field was pretty big but the only thing was making it unusable was the grass
>it was so tall no1 ever wanted just to go through there they went arround it
>as we were stomping grass which faught back like we were re-enacting attack on titan a familliar sound can be heard
>it was G blowing war horns: "GRAMMA ,GRAMMA ,GRAMMA ,GRANPA , GRANPA , GRANPA ..."
>he really wanted to go home for some reason
>then the unheard of has happened
>G stopped with the mating call
>there must have been a reason for this and a pretty legit one for that manner
>we see him actually going out a big patch of grass whitch covered the back entrance of the block where he lived (it was unaccessable)
>"what were you doing there "
>he explained he was taking a shit
>thesmell.avi
>it was not comming from the back entrance it was comming from G
>his hand was covered with crap
>"what he fuck did you do ? why is your hand covered in shit ?"
>he explained that when he took the dump he grabed the massive turd and spelled his name
>whattheactualfuck.webm
>we could not possibly belive this we had to see this for our selves
>we went there and it was evident
>big brown letters GOGO (gogo is short for George in my language)
>everyone who comes acros this masterpiece will know who did it
>>674279360
>as years pass his mental level stays the same
>we don't really talk to G unless spoken to or nesecery
>he still hangs out with us but gets more strange habbits including but not limited to stupid questions , "say a joke"
>he gets super religeous and whenever we beat him sais that god will punish us with a dead serious face
>When he passes over something white like some trash or ciggarete burns he has to jump over it between 3 to 7 times
>he starts walking 5-10 meters infront of us or behind when we were manuvering arround the hood
>G was allways out with the ball and when no1 was playing he was chasing it arround the street all alone for hours
>he even stays outside and sits on the benches of the next entrance for god knows what reason all alone
not sure if you guys grasp the dept of of his retardnes yet
>one evening a few days before new years eve people were throwing tiny bombs out of the windows because of the new years spirit
>we are just having a normal chat with Denis and G sitting on a bench
>then obvious 3 shots in were heard
>i state the obvios "that was a gun"
>Denis did not really get bothered by this news but then something happens
>it is like G is awoken from some kind of deep trance
>like he breaths air for the first time
>outofnowhere.dlc
>"who's is it ?"
>i swear to god Denis has never cursed like this even his most sworn enemies
>on one hand it was shocking on the other the reaction of G's best bud was priceless
>"G how the fuck can you ask this question ? To what extend are you stupid? I swear to god if there is a test that one of the questions is how many fingers do you have on your hands with the given answer A:5 B:10 C:20 D:Bananas and oranges , you will pick the fruit basket!"