ITT: Work Secrets
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
ITT: Work Secrets
Not OP but does anyone have any questions about prison guards
>>674121790
describe a nightmare scenario
>>674121790
post best shank and poison making methods in prison
>>674121790
How much would I have to pay to get you to skip my cell on a routine check
>>674121790
How long you been in? I was a CSO for 4 years, then took over my facilities armory. Been servicing the fleet of pistols, shotguns, and rifles for about 2 years. I don't see the yard much these days
>>674121579
Mazzio's ranch is just buttermilk, mayo, and chuckwagon ranch seasoning.
I'm a supervisor at a factory.... My secret is that I have blacks working under me and I make them work super hard compared to the white guy I have working under me.
I work in retail and it requires everyone to use a walky talky with a headpiece. In turn customers can't hear what is said and the amount of shit talk that is involved related to customers is astounding.
Walmartfag reporting in.
1. cashiers hide extra cash under the cash tray
2. bomb threats will cause everyone in the building to evacuate
3. employees are not allowed to stop if you're stealing something, only security guards can do that
4. everyone uses walkie-talkies, so it's easy to fuck with them
>>674121579
friend used to steal supplies. just keep an eye out on cameras, as long as its not money you can always blame it on the customers
i hire women for 77% of the amount of a man even though they do the same if not more work
i hire men because it makes no sense under this logic
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T59m2AYGo6g
work hard and keep your head down. boss doesnt know im banging his wife on a regular basis.
>>674122476
I'm surprised they haven't noticed yet. The white guy walks around while the other guys are struggling moving furniture. One guy asked me why he gas to work so hard and I told him if he doesn't like it then quit.
In an actual 8 hour day, I only do real work for about 3 hours. The rest of my time is filled with socializing with my co-workers, finger fucking my phone, and wondering around aimlessly making it look like I am looking for stuff. Why? `cause fuck the corporation who thinks they are so high and mighty, they don`t have a fucking clue what is going on, or what their hourly employees actually do and contribute.
I work produce in a grocery store and I like to pee down the drain in the cooler full of food just because
>Mfw
>>674121790
ever been shanked?
>>674122556
code brown for shootings...
niggers much
>>674122944
Checked, I also do the same thing
From what I've learnt the whole fear over germs with food is bullshit. As long as that shit is mostly kept at a certain temperature it's fine.
I first worked at Subway and it was "you touch food, you wear gloves" after that it was at a pizza shop where I never wore gloves, handled money and would touch different surfaces and lo and behold not a single person ever complained about food poisoning.
>>674121790
Ever walked in on a raping?
>>674122556
>being so underage that you think these are "secrets"
>>674122556
>White
>Accident
>Brown
>Shooting
i draw cocks all over the bathroom stalls when i go for a smoke. every monday the nice cleaning people whipe them off so i have more room to draw cocks
>>674123587
You're saying this like it's a surprise? What white person shoots people?
>>674123288
The pizza oven kills the germs. After that, you never touch the pizza with your hands; you use a giant spatula and a pizza cutter. A CEO at Papa Johns personally taught me that at work.
i work in a restaurant. if you are a complete asshole, you're getting pubes/spit/snot in your food or drink. i thought it was a movie stereotype.
nothing quite like going in the walk-in freezer and someone is teabagging a glass of soda.
Had multiple jobs.
Job 1/5
Fast Food
Dropped shit on the ground. Served it. Drank from cups then used them. Would talk shit to customers, they'd call assistant managers number (me) and I'd say that ill fire that guy. Then they get apologetic and I hang up to make them feel bad. Most food sits there for long periods of time. We never washed our hands, Only when food audit was there. Has sex/got head in the back/fridge. Got caught once, the employee just smiled, turned around, and walked away. I was in charge of the sexual harassment training. I was more sexual with my employees than anyone. Any questions?
>>674123288
You dumb nigger, you have bacteria in your ass. If you don't wash your hands properly you can give some one an infection.
>>674123288
Way to stick it to big soap.
>>674122750
Stop trying to promote your shitty unoriginal video
>>674121790
So you weren't going to answer any of the questions, you just wanted to know if we had any?
>>674123787
Yeah, that's not really a secret. It's pretty much restaurant 101.
>>674123800
Kek'd and checked
>>674123787
Yeah I was always worried about chicken being left out but it seems to be as long as it's cooked it can be left out for ages without anything going wrong.
>>674123787
That`s not a secret, that shit happens everywhere in restaurants across the country, jesus fuck I use to do that shit 30 years ago when I was a bus boy.
>>674123288
Look up Typhoid Mary.
>>674121873
Dirty guard
>>674121903
Best shank I saw was made from a spoon idk how they made it
>>674122018
I search it first then decide how much you're willing to pay
>>674122097
2 so far it's not too bad. I work in an open bay mostly
I make videogames and it sucks ass. I miss animation but there's hardly any money in it so it's become incredibly competitive.
>>674123750
>never touch pizza with you hands
Oh I did that plenty and people seemed fine.
>>674122556
>Code blue
>bomb
Why? Doesn't code blue universally mean respiratory/cardiac emergency? Do you walk into a hospital and think there's a bomb threat every night? I suppose this does make sense to avoid mass hysteria.
>>674122484
I'm interviewing for a customer service specialist job at Best Buy tomorrow where they use the same shit. Will I be hearing shit talking?
I'm a paramedic in ambulences.
When you're knocked out, yes, we judge you for everything. Yes, we make fun of you when you're drunk. Yes, some of the guys and girls grope you. I've done it to multiple patients who were picked up after crashes in DUIs.
>>674121790
Is there a Rape Culture in Prison?
>>674123794
Are you implying I finger my ass and then handle food? I always washed my hands before and after going to the bathroom but other than that unless I properly picked something off the floor I wouldn't wash my hands.
>>674123787
>they'd call assistant managers number (me) and I'd say that ill fire that guy. Then they get apologetic and I hang up to make them feel bad.
This happens at every job. 99% of the time the managers do not give a fuck. Unless you're calling corporate, you're wasting your time.
>>674123787
Job 2/5
Mall Security.
Yes, I am staring at you.
Yes I am following you just because you're hot.
I would ride the gem carts around till the battery died and leave it. Only to blame other employees for it dying.
Rode the cart so hard once that I broke the A frame that's attached to the wheel. Would race other people on my segue. Took naps all night if I worked closed shift. Found some kids smoking pot and told them I'd report them if they didn't give me the weed. Kept it. Would spend hours on the roof. Jacking off, dropping shit on people. Sleeping. Stole anything of value from the lost and found. Got a nice watch out of it and some credit/gift cards.
>>674123776
Wow so edgy.
I never understood the fags I worked with when I waited tables that did that shit.
Like how pathetic is your life that this is what you resort to because someone said a mean thing you? Fucking whiny assholes. A real man handles his business face to face. And this is the story of why I was fired a bunch of times.
But no one ever got away with disrespecting me. Unlike you, who's big comeback was secretly doing something they'll never know about, that won't hurt them in any way, in secret. like a little bitch.
>>674124489
Enjoy your future lawsuit. I saw on the news something that happened with a big time fucking ambulance company.
>>674123078
I had someone cut my arm but not straight up shanked
>>674123316
No but I walked in on a blowjob three times now>>674123838
My bad bro I had to take a phone call
I work in a hotel, any questions? I'll reply honestly.
>>674124514
Yes. There is also a lot of prison homosexuality. Gay in prison straight on the streets
>>674124703
>hurr I'll handle this like a man
>oh no i'm fired
>hurrr manly
any questions for a airline pilot?
>>674124627
Fuck you, Blart
>>674124921
Find any nice shit?
>>674124921
Do you do anything to toothbrushes?
>>674124703
Enjoy your glass of ice tea that I just stirred with my cock that was dripping with cum and your waitress`s drool..
>>674123750
Can't tell if real or elaborate bait to implicate Papa Johns CEO as pedophile.
>>674124981
>a airline
im a lawyer
is true every of us eventually get some nigger's leg broken to commit insurance fraud. being there myself ... questions? (have in mind im not from the states)
>>674124981
how sure are you that you'll die from radiation?
>>674125126
or Hitler
ask someone who works for comcast anything
>>674124627
Job 3/5
Big chain office store
Not much happened here.
Once I became the warehouse manager I stole everything I could get my hands on and mess with the shrink totals to make it look like nothing happened. Best things I got was a nexus 7 and a laptop that retailed about $600. As well as about $400 worth of sd cards and flash drives.
I added up how much I took after 2 years. It was around $3500. Had a system for getting it out of the store. Felt good man.
>>674124483
Yes. We had a handicapped kid working at our best buy that would spew the most unbelievable shit about foreigners over the mic system and nobody could do shit since he was protected by the law for being handicapped.
>>674122556
>code adam
Was adam a pedophile who stole a child? Why is everything else a colour then this is a name?
>>674124981
>Knock Knock
Who's There?
>Mam it's the police your son has been killed by a hit and run driver, the driver was a airline
>>674121579
we make fun of patients all the time
>>674124981
i had a friend that would regularly get blackout drunk and then fly the next morning (the first flights, there at 5-7am). Is this usual or was this the one weird outlyer?
>>674124983
What's even better, is my name is actually Paul. How many times would people call it out in reference to the movie and I'd turn cause its actually my name.
>>674122944
Trust me. They know *exactly* what is going on.
>>674125155
"an" feel better big boy?
>>674125196
about 90% sure its going to fuck something up
>>674125018
I once found a 10 EUR note and some weed but that's it.
>>674125042
What kind of hotel offers toothbrushes lol
>>674124133
no you're wrong fucking idiot
Rogl
I worked at a golf course
One time I peed in the ball washing machine for driving range balls
Am I doing it right?
>>674125266
its named after adam walsh, the kid who was abducted in the 8os and killed. his father went on a crusade to protect children or some shit
>>674125425
Si I feel very better papi
>>674125449
>hotel
>toothbrushes
>working at a hotel
>customers leave their toothbrushes in the hotel
My lord it's brain science and rocket surgery you'll get it one day!
>tfw work at Wegman's and never have any cool tricks or stories to tell
oh well
Not sure how you assholes will use this info but at McDonalds there are two types of workers, grill workers and service. The service people are the ones who work the registers. At Mcdonalds they have this thing called a T-Red. If at any time they put something in the register, like say, a Big mac, and then the person ordering changes their mind and tells them they want a double cheeseburger instead, and they cancel the Big Mac, they get a T-Red. Service people can only get 2.5% of their sales in T-Reds, as in, if they sell $100 of food, and have to cancel off $2.50 of it or more, they get in trouble.Employees can get written up, have their pay docked, and even be fired if they frequently have high T-Reds, which most managers say is anything above 5%. So if you eat at McDonalds and you don't want to be an asshole, make sure you know what you want before you order something.
>>674122320
sadistic shit...sooo YOU got worked by your brotha back in the day and now youre a scumbag boss to your brothas at work? you are gay and full of hate dude.
>>674125265
Well I'm disabled and bipolar so fuck it
>>674121579
I work as a Delta ground agent and I can confirm that the TSA will not be able to prevent a terrorist attack. Airports and airplanes are far less secure than people think. As a delta bag handler, I walk back and forth from "secured" areas with no checks. I often carry bags through these areas. All it would take to seriously fuck some shit up is one ground agent to walk into a secure area with a bag full of C4. Pretty scary stuff Im surprised it hasnt happened yet.
I used to have sex with an intern of 16 when I was 28. I'm 32 now and still crave for her cunt everyday.
>>674125556
Oh, cheers anon
>>674125556
ya no shit thats the show america's most wanted you stupid underaged faggot
>>674125497
I'm yet to see anything happen, I worked with cooked chicken for over a year, the chefs would just leave it out on the bench cooling for hours on end and I'd always just leave it on the bench after it was chopped, no one ever got sick even when we used it 3 days later.
>>674125265
>inb4 non-mental handicrapped
>>674125585
Nigga I have never ever found people leaving toothbrushes. What kind of moron would you be to take toothbrush with you and not take it with you again? Holy fuck
>>674125266
Adam walsh was this kid who got kidnapped at this mall like 20 minutes from my house and they found his head in the toilet. That started the whole stranger danger thing in the 90s
>>674125733
just because you don't get sick and throw up doesn't not make it filthy and fucking disgusting.
>>674125674
Oh also we purposely throw bags if they are too heavy. Pack light you assholes I dont have time to gently set down your 90lb bag of shoes.
>>674125266
Code Adam is named after Adam Walsh, John Walsh's deceased son. It started a while ago and it means a missing child. So if you hear that over the loudspeaker, know that a kid is missing in the store. Most stores lockdown the store so no one can come in or out.
>>674125227
Job 4/5
Worked at MAJOR computer component manufacturing plant
Not much could be got away with here.
We had catwalks for some of the machines. Would sleep while a buddy "worked on the machine" below me. Would trade off every 20 minutes for hours. Made fucking bank for almost nothing.
>>674125794
So wait, you've never ever seen someone come to a hotel and leave the roam without their toothbrush?
>>674125449
Oh I thought you worked somewhere nice but you work at a hostel.
I'm a pediatrician.
High school girls usually act as my secretary to earn community service hours.
They usually know a few patients of mine.
I always get pressured to share the penis size of their classmates.
FYI: doctors love to gossip.
>>674125855
So it's filthy and disgusting yet overall doesn't actually cause any damage... right.
At my job we recently started animal testing. Ask me anything.
>>674125674
Thoughts on TSA scanners?
>>674121579
speaking of mcdicks.
yes, some branches (mine is one of them) are as bad as the deepest corner of your brain quietly expects.
employees are dirty niggers (skin color notwithstanding) who are incapable of literally anything else, including basic hygiene.
nobody gives a FUCK what happens to your food before it gets to you.
nigger employees are not punished for anything ever because its expected that the next person they bring in will be identical.
seriously study your location's mcdicks before you ever place an order
>>674125725
uhm he wasnt always the host of that show you fucking cuntbagel... he only became in the spotlight after his kid was murdered and he launched a crusade to protect other kids, and he became a celebrity with his efforts... doing AMW was after the fact. now go google some facts before you come here talking shit you know nothing about you underage nigger
>>674125223
Can i have an xfinity email/password so i can get free wifi anywhere?
>>674125902
what would be considerred bank?
>>674126017
I guess so but goddamn would you let me cum all over your face and in your butthole because overall it "doesn't actually cause any damage"?
>>674125990
Why do you know the penis size of their classmates? Until I thought I had syphilis I don't think I ever showed my doctor my dick after I was a baby
>>674122944
Same. I work at a department store and I usually work really hard those three hours and do nothing the rest of the shift. My job is basically restocking, rearranging the floor and cleaning up after customers.
im prejudice to customers and notify security about anyone who puts their bags on the floor, has a backpack and a hat, looks sketchy, uses a shopping cart with a ton of stuff in it and isn't white or is just a large Micronesian family in general. 85% of the time I've been correct with assumptions and 15% of the time our loss prevention wasn't there or the customer didn't leave any trace of stealing
>>674126044
>checked
Guess I'll start with the basics; what are you testing and do the animals survive it?
>>674125928
Not ever.
>>674125969
its a 3 * hotel. If you're that lazy of a cunt to leave your shit in the bathroom then piss off.
>>674124703
i think you're trolling but i'll bite anyway.
a real man handles business face to face, man to man, i completely agree. do the worst customers follow that motto? no, they have your job as leverage and abuse the fuck out it by treating people terribly. i have seen customers berate staff and demand they are fired. i've seen fragile waitresses in tears because they are treated like garbage by people that would never treat another person like that if they didn't have that person's job held hostage in a sense.
fuck those people, hope they like balls.
>>674125630
That sucks ass. That's probabky a way to shuffle minimum wage and not even pay that. I cab imagine McDonalda having a new employee every 3 weeks or so just so they skip the payment.
>>674126216
You're exaggerating a little bit, just admit you're wrong and move on anon.
>>674123750
>>674123288
You guys realize that oven heat doesn't kill all forms of microbes? There are plenty of food borne illnesses that can survive temperatures past 100 degrees Celsius.
>>674126140
no, they have to be tied to an account on a billing level basis, if i gave you one it would quit working in a few weeks at best.
>>674126265
I work at a hammer factory. We hit the survivors again.
>>674126267
Wow you must be a fucking liar then!
>>674125990
Faggot looking at dicks
>>674126154
Considering my age at the time and the amount of work I did in a day (turned about 11 handles for a machine a day) I was bringing in about 50k a year.
>>674126097
I mean the TSA scanners would make it difficult to get any sort of weapon through but all they really do is waste peoples times. The fact that the rest of the workers like myself dont have to go through these scanners means there is a huge hole in their protection. All they do is make people feel safe. Its not really feasible to scan workers every time they go between secured and unsecured areas.
>>674125630
What about maintenance, asshole... We clean the fucking grill you cook on you inconsiderate reprobate
>>674125674
>Im surprised it hasnt happened yet.
i'm not. terrorist attacks like that are rare as fuck and unlikely to happen. the media bolsters news about the few that do in order to keep you employed. have any of your coworkers fondled a child yet?
>>674126397
>ovens only get to 100°C
>>674125686
Kill yourself
>>674126044
What do you test on them?
>>674126379
NO U! one day you'll get sick motherfucker. squirting on the toilet. gonna be thinking of me ;)
>>674126429
thanks for making sure my hammers work
>>674126397
The point is I've never seen anything really happen. The one time food poisoning got reported was on our very first day open at a Subway restaurant, all our food was literally fresh and only one chick came in and even then it was from something else because no one else complained.
Seems to be people just freak out over it when in reality little to no care needs to be taken short term other than just storage temperature and that you cook everything properly (and by everything I basically mean chicken).
>>674121579
>hurr durr ask for fries no salt and ask for salt at window to get fresh fries!
I hear this all the time and it's complete bs. You're not clever if you do this. You can just ask for it fresh and chances are we already have a fresh batch ready and you're the pleb who has to wait an extra five minutes for your shit.
Also, some true rumors from a Mcdicks employee:
>drive through soda tastes better than lobby soda
It's filtered through more often
>we have hot tea bags
>most of the breakfast menu is microwaved
>you can do the 2 for 3.33 egg muffin and substitute everything to make any other breakfast sandwich
>you do not get more coffee from large iced coffee
We just load it with more cream and liquid sugar
>you can refill hot coffee
>>674125990
Do you get to see lolis naked ?
>>674126632
I work at a hammer factory
>>674122484
Yeah they have this weird habit of talking in fart morse codes it's annoying
>>674126635
Well no shit I've been sick before, I never got sick eating any of my own food though, have a nice day anon.
>>674125630
the t-red system is fucking stupid. because if you change an item, the customer is still paying for it, and I know what the point of that system is for. its to reduce theft for people ringing up expensive food then changing it to a lower price one after its totaled. thus reducing the total amount. with the dual point system this makes t-reds irrelevant because theres no way to "steal" food this way regardless. they give out the food that was PAID FOR. mcdonalds is living in the past with this system
>>674126530
I mean medical risks of the scanners. Also do you guys still see our dicks through them?
>>674126423
Ah well, worth a shot. Thanks anyways, anon
Work At homeDepot the code for the locks on everything is the store number at everyhomedepot
>>674126447
whatever. You're a wanker if you actually leave toothbrushes in a hotel bathroom.
>>674125990
>be me in high school
>a girl in class randomly accused me of having a baby dick
>i had no fucking clue what her problem was or how she knew my secret
now i know what happened. fuck you
I work at a very expensive and popular restaurant in New York City. After closing every night one of the other sous chefs and I put small amounts of cum, shit, piss, and boogers in pretty much every sauce / food we can get away with doing it to.
>>674122944
anon wat u do
>>674125794
I always buy a shitty tooth brush and leave it at the hotel.
>>674122320
Wow your edge seems sharp bro. Must be as cool as Hitler. Wow, you're so rad. Now you can post on 4chan and be cool.
An hero.
>>674126850
They can see an outline of a dick I suppose (I dont work for TSA, just as a baggage chucker and plane marshaller for Delta). If you're worried about the radiation risk you shouldnt be, its far less than the radiation you are receiving for an extended period of time while flying in the plane.
>>674126694
Wellyou have to understand too that just because you never heard anything doesn't mean it didn't happen. Furthermore not all sicknesses spread from food cause food poisoning they might actually just make someone sick. Did you know handling cash has caused anthrax outbreaks? You'd be responsible for that spread by not washing your hands and wearing gloves.
>>674124826
>ambulance company.
america
>>674124940
Different anon but if you're still here, I've seen other CO's say most of the sex is consensual and that rape is uncommon but you answered yes. Are guards just expected to say that rape is exaggerated in order to cover the department's asses?
>>674127190
calm down bill cosby.
>>674123705
columbine_cafeteria.jpg
>>674127184
Thanks anon
>>674127081
this
they're like a dollar, and way more hygenic than sticking your wet, sink brush in a bag and taking it with you when you travel
I am a police officer in a large US city. I plant weed on as many white teenagers as possible to try to fix the racist arrest statistics that exist.
>>674127144
lol u mad bro
>>674127336
It was a set up for those two boys.
>>674127081
>>674125794
I don't buy a shitty tooth brush cuz I bring my own toothbrush. So what, you buy a new one every time you travel? That sounds pretty retarded imo.
>>674126600
Pressure ovens smart one...besides my point is that microbes are resilient bastards.
>>674124981
Do you like your job?
Was it worth the training and time to get the proper license?
Does it pay decently?
Any recommendations as to where to start training?
>>674125990
Wait, you mean doctors talk about my penis behind my back? What the flying fuck?! I trusted my doctors!
I'm a professional victim I accuse others of racism and sexism until they promote me to get out of their hair. I used to run reddit, but there are millions of people like me.
>>674127417
lol you rad bro
>>674127344
no prob
Pharmacyfag here (assistant) ama
>>674127404
Nigger
I've recently decided to start watching tv shows and shit on my computer at work. With only the last 2.5 weeks to gage from I'm more productive than the last month combined.
>>674127515
I can afford 10 dollars a year on toothbrushes.
>>674127404
Uhh... What?
I drive a forklift
You can tell how far off your forks are from the ground by looking at the ring of dirt around the hydraulic middle pipe/cylinder
>>674121790
How did you get that job? What was training like?
>>674127768
salary?
>>674126274
>no, they have your job as leverage and abuse the fuck out it by treating people terribly. i have seen customers berate staff and demand they are fired. i've seen fragile waitresses in tears because they are treated like garbage
this is why you are supposed to pursue other careers and get the fuck out of there. fucking liberals. "i did it, a place accepted my dumb ass for once! that means i have to eat shit for the rest of my life now!"
fuck off. yes waiting tables is a shitty job.
yes you will be treated like shit.
to rectify this, get a better job. the human race is not going to magically start being nice because you carried a burger three feet across a room.
I work as a manger at a Papa John's over the summer, AMA
>>674127768
How do you feel poisoning all of us with treatments and not giving us cures?
>>674126919
>>674127832
I watch YouTube, go on CNN, surf the web all day and somehow I have the best review in an office full of people who graduated from top 30 Colleges.
>>674121579
I have floated around the country a bit... mainly because I am from a wealthy family and cant decide what to do with my life... Here are some of the random jobs I have had in my life
>apprentice bartender at a casino in Las Vegas
>Starbucks... both at a normal store and at a Casino (was fired from the casino one for massive kek reasons)
>personal trainer at Golds Gym... (I... yea this lasted a year - they make shit unless you get stable clients.)
>Call center at verizon (decent benefits and pay but... I dont really need money or people fucking my ear over and over with complaints)
>Target floor person
Oh Im also an old fag and worked at
>Hollywood video (from 2001 to like 2005)
>>674128088
Papa bless
>>674128089
Kill yourself retard. How do people this dumb exist? Are you aware of how much longer people live these days thanks to modern medicine / drugs?
>>674127560
You are fucking retarded, 100C is 212F, most commercial pizza ovens cook at more like 600F
>>674125110
That scenario is kinda hot
>>674122320
It's sad that your whole life amounts to that. To show off your temporary 'superiority'. I feel sorry for you if you really have such a feeble mind.
>>674123776
>Rewind 6 years ago
>Hated going to restraunts with my mom
>Everytime she would cuss out the person taking our order or yell at the guy over the fast food intercom
>Don't say anything cause beta bitch
>Know there is a decent chance my order is going to have spit on it too
>Have to eat it anyway because "We don't waste food"
22 now. The only times I actually get mad at servers is when they either give me stuff I'm allergic too when I warn them to exclude before hand or they mess up an order twice. After that it's fair game to call that dumb cunt at dennys who almost killed me a bitch, and throw my food at her.
>>674127189
Could it happen, sure, has it happened, no. I just don't see the danger in it, plus if you're going to suddenly keel over because you touched a coin it's your time to go.
We used to have this one bitch that always said "I'm deathly allergic to seafood so don't get any on there" so I'd change my gloves and my knife and the cunt didn't realize that all the food we touch is cross contaminated with the other food just from us going back and forth when making them. Amazingly, she was full of shit.
Any questions for an atmospheric scientist? (fancy word for I do weather)
>>674128358
Trollers gonna troll.
>>674128341
Keep taking your Prozac kid. Enjoy
I'm a mechanic. I cum in your intake manifolds and do not afraid of anything.
Anyone have questions about industrial slaughter houses
>worked at a race horse track in the "backyard"
>backyard was full of vagrant gambler addicts
>work at food stand
>often had drunk asshole customers give us shit
>pioneer system of fucking gross payback
One of my co-workers had big ass stretched ears
If youre unfamiliar, the skin around gauges rot and smell like gutting a deer mixed with synthetic cheese mix
>beginning of day co-worker feeds 3 hotdogs through death-hole
>put on back of warming machine/leave there until asshole appears
When someone gave us shit, we would use the
code word "frank", serve them an ear cheese
dog, and watch him eat it as we choke back vomit
>>674128254
You have the Papa's blessing
Kmart Layaway associate here.
When a customer comes with an attitude to come pick up their stuff I sit up stairs for about 30 mins "looking" for their thing and then tell them we lost it.
>>674128514
Whats the weather like where you are and how often are your prediction correct?
I work at starbucks, ama
I'm a truck driver who only drives locally. And I can't count how many times I've fucked on the road making my deliveries late or fucked where we store our veggies.
We all do that. Or jerk off to porn when we're tired during the night shift.
Great way to stay awake.
>>674128564
Generalizing all pharmaceuticals just because your mom made you take antidepressants is massively ignorant.
>>674122750
Did you make that video? It's the shittest thing I've ever seen. Get a new hobby and never make a YouTube video again you nigger.
Anyone want to ask a nurse anything?
-Worked burn units
-Current wound care at nursing home
-Prn at a pediatric hospital
>>674124476
the nigger works at walmart you really think they have any insight into an actual paying job?
>>674121579
I work in a sports shop. Everything I buy I get HEAVILY discounted.
Those $250 shoes that you buy cost me $80.
>>674128824
What went wrong?
>>674121579
The McDonald's shamrock shake is actually made with soylent green.
I work at a Toyota dealership and masturbate in the cars that are being serviced.
>>674128956
are there sexual relationships at the hospital or is that a TV thing? I'm curious since I work there and it doesn't seem like it happens tbh
>>674128342
Jesus are you having a bad day? Do you need a hug? I'm not a pizza boy sorry for not knowing pizza oven temperatures. In any case even that is not hot enough to kill certain dangerous microbes.
>>674126234
>contacting loss prevention
Haha fuck that I dont get paid to care about the things i sell only to sell them.
>>674127994
Me too
Why don't you just look at the forks you idiot
>>674128824
Did you ever throw coffee at some one? How many niggers try and order of the secret menu?
>>674126429
Shitty joke you stole from a thread earlier or yesterday faggot.
>>674129061
Its my first job, cant do much better yet
>>674128872
On the flip side if you have a wife/Special other while being a trucker 99.7% chance she's banging some other dude. my family and their friends do truck driving and all their wives have rumors of infedelity floating around.
>>674129162
Not that guy, but have you ever made fucking food before? You really think you'd cook something in an oven even close to 100°C?
>>674128818
clear, 13C. Accurate 99% of the time, the computers we use to help forecast for weather are extremely accurate and when you forecast for the same area every year.
>>674129162
what microbes are you talking about, uncategorized undiscovered ebola strains festering in the niggeryest bowels of africa?
>>674123750
you met Papa John?!?!
>>674128956
any cute kids that aren't burnt?
>>674128956
is there any patient you've been particularly emotionally invested with? inversely, is there anyone you ever wished he'd die off?
>>674129210
More like a month ago
>>674121579
I got fired for quoting Teenage Dirt Bag on my self appraisal.
>>674129101
which is what?
>>674129151
Some times, it's really rare though. It's more likely you'll encounter elderly fucking in there rooms(Which is very common) than catching a nurse blow a doctor. 90% of the time were too busy to do that shit, and if you're not busy you're not doing your job right or you would home health.
>>674129222
are you 16?
>>674129101
10/10 post anon.
>>674128604
How much is your snap-on collection worth?
>>674129162
That's not pizza boy shit, it's common sense, not to be confused with intelligence, which you seem to lack as well, the kind of bacteria typically found on food and transfered from humans is going to be eradicated at these kind of temperatures, these are similar to standard autoclave temperatures that take care of 99.9% of bacteria, for the other 0.1% of this super bacteria you are so horny to talk about it won't matter what you do, it will infect people whether you wash your hands or wear gloves or any of that shit, get your head out of your ass and think before you speak instead of acting like you know something that you clearly don't
Use to work at Cheyenne mountain/norad. The stargate exists, there is a sign on a utility closet that says "stargate" 100% serious.
>>674121579
I had four secretaries so far and made all of them blow me on a regular base.
btw: I'm not a highprofile manager. just a random guy established enough to have a secretary
Arcade manager here, yes modern claw machines are rigged, go for the older ones. Check the prize hole through the glass (if you can). See transparent plastic? Probably a prize meter on the game.
Also some of the older ones trip every game because they're fucked so they game will never properly payout. Some never trip the prize meter so it improperly pays out. Some give it higher strength every X number of games.
Also prizes generally cost us around 2.50 each depending on the plush, licensed plush is 3-5 bucks. The only thing that is worth less than the price of playing the game are shitty inflatable balls.
Barber cut, Knock it off, Fancy Cutter, Marksman, keymasters, etc are all rip offs.
Don't climb on skeeball you dumb nigger, seriously that shits for mexicans and niggers. Also most skeeballs have noises for certain points, if I hear certain noises I check.
commis for carluccios in uk, ama
>>674129744
You're from the mountains in Chechnya?
>>674129714
>>674128642
hav u ever fucked an animal corpse
>>674129744
Tell them that Universe sucks and we want SG1 back.
>>674126709
Asking the important questions.
>>674128072
asshole in a restaurant spotted
>>674129875
Thanks anon
>>674129404
Yea, but like I said I drive locally and comes home everyday like everybody else.
And I lived with my ex for three years and I fucked her so many times in the banana room at work and in my truck.
Feels great to get paid while having sex.
Here is a good one. Very few places have real cherry coke anymore yet they make you pay more for it. They just mix the Coke with cherry fanta.
>>674125660
>>674128358
Lel u mad niggers?
>>674128072
If you treat people like shit when they don't deserve it, expect some payback. It's simply what you deserve.
>>674129201
Niggers dont drink coffee but little girls are the only ones who order from the secret menu and we hate them all.
I also judge people based on what they look like, if theyre middle eastern they order chai, if theyre chinks they order iced espresso in the biggest cup and fill it with the creamer at the condiment bar because chinks are cheap. I give them decaf every time
>>674124429
oh dude, what games do you make? why no money? why sucky sucky?
>>674130005
The USDA would tell me supervisor, then he'd fuck my corpse.
I Work at a lumber mill in WNY. Sometimes I pee behind the packs of wood when I really have 2/too lazy to walk to the bathroom. It's very dusty so it like dries immediatly lol used to toke 3-4 times a day bc working at a lumber mill is hell on earth. Cleaning up for a new job now tho
I'm an assistant teacher at a high school and it's the black students that always have the lowest grades. Plus they're a lot harder to teach too.
>>674129109
do you have a hybrid tech at your shop and if so what's his rate in US dollars?
Any questions for a Bed Bath & Beyond DM?
>>674130462
>why am I not surprised?
>>674127404
hate you nigger, you cant change reality.
Pornshop fag here. Despite what we say, we totally judge every single person that makes purchases here and laugh our ass of about them when they leave.
>>674125176
Are all lawyer's grammar so terrible?
>>674130585
Yeah why are you guys never fucking hiring?
>>674125660
nigger detected
>>674129485
Cute as in adorable? Oh yeah. One of my favorites used to go around in her wheelchair making flowers for the windows of kids who were on radiation treatment.
>>674129495
Yeah, it was really fucked what happened too. If I had been working that shift though I probably would have gotten fired for beating the shit out of the Nurse who did it. I won't name anyone but one of the kids I worked with I was literally considering adopting them if they stayed if the parents didn't get custody back.
Long story short a dumbass who recently got their RN didn't double check the who to give the drug to and thought bed numbers were enough instead of using a barcode that takes a few seconds longer. Injected the wrong person with insulin and killed 2 kids in the process.
At least the dumb bitch is in jail.
2? No not really, there are some kids or elderly that I really hated helping but I would quit the day I actually wanted some one to die.
>>674130612
funniest things you've seen?
Nicest customer you've ever had?
>>674130612
Nigga you work at a porn shop. You're the real life quagmire but without all the pussy
>>674130462
real shocker there
>>674126703
>we have hot tea bags
>you can do the 2 for 3.33 egg muffin and substitute everything to make any other breakfast sandwich
Mcdonalds is making the "clear cups" smaller and you are paying the same price. so your frappe and msoothies, orange juice and shakes arent the 12 and 16 ounces they used to be... the cups are about 1 ounce smaller but you dont notice it by just looking at it... and they charging you the same price for these reduced portions
they did this a few years back with the 32 ounce drinks. they changed to a 30 ounce cup
and nobody suspected a thing
>>674125394
You seem like the kind of person who ends on "instant karma" compilation videos.
>>674130634
We're constantly hiring. Seriously, our turnover rate is incredibly high.
However, something seriously wrong has to happen to hire from outside for a management position. We like to hire from inside. It keeps moral and the managers are more pliable then.
>>674130720
So they're all crippled? Fuck that. Any jailbait?
>>674130612
u ever here of a buddy booth? Idk if thats the correct term or exactly what it is. Just curious
>>674130720
holy shit that is fucked up
what would you say is the most important thing for a soon to be doc?
Pipeline welder in canada
AMA
>Work at McDonald
>slap our cocks in every cheese burger
>One day the new kid fucking cums in burger
>Man is upset bc burger is late
>mix the cum with secret sauce
>give it to him
>he never find out
>>674130612
>Works at porn shop
>Laughs at other people
Lol, you are like beta fag max.
>>674128604
Okay, instead of making oldfag jokes, I'll actually bite.
>be me
>get job to put rebuilt 5.3 in 08 Chevy pickup
>get motor in
>spin crank to get all torque converter nuts tight
>start motor
TICK TICK TICK TICK TICK TICK
>wtftbhfam.rar
>drop diff and remove oil pan
>see pick related (shattered pistob
I found a bolt in the #7 combustion chamber. All the bolts were accounted for on my end so we pulled it out and sent it back. A week or so later they called us and said that we didn't have to pay for another engine. I have pictures but they are on my work tablet.
>>674123288
Serv-Safe certified former restaurant manager here. Gloves give a false appearance of sanitation, but I've seen people handle money, touch a garbage can, wipe their nose, etc. and then not change their gloves. Gloves don't work unless they're changed frequently.
Also, I get tired of hearing dumb ass faggots who don't know shit about foodborne illness coming in and saying "your food made me sick." These dumb assholes just assume the last thing they eat made them ill, when some cases can take up to 72 hours to incubate. In reality, you're 100x more likely to get food poisoning from your own kitchen than you are from a properly run restaurant.
>>674125556
"His name was Adam Walsh"
>>674131001
Wasn't talking about a management position, Michael Scott. Just a regular part time position. I've put in there many times and never even gotten a call back
>>674127404
Oh look, /pol/ is reverse trolling again.
>>674131142
sure, kid. Sure.
>>674121790
Father in law is c.o and so is step-father in law. I'm good dude. I know how mentaly fucked 90% of you are.
>>674130721
>Dude shook a turd out of his pants and ran out the door.
>cucumbers with muddy condoms found in arcade bathroom
>dude had a seizure in the arcade and passed out with his pants and underwear around his ankles, woke up to manager trying to help him up, immediately blamed manager for "knocking him out" and called the cops. Hilarious night.
>was offered a blowjob by a completely non-passable tranny and a lonely old man
>Most people are pretty nice
>>674131226
What state? It's actually kind of sad because we're seriously always going through applications.
>>674131459
Delaware
>>674130329
>when they don't deserve it
key words.
you're imagining the qt3.14 who accidentally shorted me a dime.
the dipfuck who dropped a plate of food on me and said "oops" with nothing but a shoulder shrug also exists. you service industry workers tend to think that everyone is you, and that's not how it is. some of your coworkers are complete fucking dipshits and they deserve to be told so
I don't always test my code, but when I do its in production.
>>674128956
Was prescribed Silverdene (and anti-bacterial) for an infected blister- bandage it or open air?
>>674129714
I feel ashamed that I do mostly have snap on tools. But until recently, all we've ever had was snap on My shitty little town.
And when I figured it for equity for my house loan, it was around $38,000.
>>674131085
At one location that I did a tour of duty at there was an arcade that the county only allowed men into. Lots and lots and lots of homosexual activity. Too much to individually describe. I usually worked nights when the bosses left and let them go to town back there because I just didn't care.
>>674128147
You must give your boss the best bj's
>>674124489
Medicfag here. You're that guy. Most of us are nothing like this turd.
>>674123006
I work produce as well, always thought about doing that.
>>674130962
>food places try to make as much money as possible even if they have to reduce portions to do so
NO FUCKING SHIT ANON?
THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING.
>>674131144
Nice dubs fag. I get paid $12 an hour to fuck around on 4chan all night. How about you?
>>674131098
Lol, thats touchy. What I will say is try and make time for everyone you see or deal with, especially at a client, it's really sad when you see guys go in there with back or muscle problems and instead of PT they prescribe a hard core opiod that they'll be on for the rest of their life and have to have increase every few years.
Also. Don't fucking give out anti-botics like candy, I see that more often than anything and dealing with MRSA is one of the most depressing things because it's my job to tell them that we have nothing that will help them get better.
>>674131578
I'm pretty good buddies with the RM in that area.
Do you have any kind of criminal background that would hinder your hiring? HR at BBB is super lax. We don't drug test, and unless it's a felony or super recent, we'll hire jailfags.
>>674131441
Also, where do you think is a good place to start to improve your sexual skill? I want to up my game
>>674131889
Imperialist racist us military. Worked the prisons in southern Iraq. I use to be accepting of all humans but after that stint I genuinely believe all Arabs should be gassed, I'm not being an edgelord either, I legitimately hate the people in that region.
Ama.
>>674129743
Here's one for the pizza boys...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1l7FF16GF5o
>>674131952
Take the supplements that the shops sell. It's just illegally used Viagra and Cialis anyway. You can go to town all fucking night on those things.
>>674131915
so essentially common sense and lex artis? shouldn't be too hard, can do that
>>674122320
THANKS YOU BRO
>>674131889
I get paid $4652 a month through the va and ssdi to do nothing all day since I was 28. Never have to work again, get on my level peasant.
>>674122750
this was fucking stupid and so are you stop making youtube videos
>>674131940
My record is sealed so no.
>>674132230
>cripple
>get on my level
I work in an emergency room, the beds get wiped clean like 20% of the time between patient's.
>>674132097
nah, I was thinking more about techniques and lubricants and shit I'm good with my endurance and stamina and stuff
>>674132005
To be fair, you only dealt with imprisoned Iraqis, so there's a very strong selection bias for scumbags.
>>674132230
What is damaged? Mind? Body? Nothing?
>>674122476
>>674121579
I have about 60 people working for me, including women and minorities, and I treat them equally.
Also, I don't fuck the help. I don't steal and I'm loyal to my company. Probably explains why I have a solid 6 figure salary.
However, about 15 years ago I was a mechanic at a gas station, and I robbed a drug dealer that was using our bathroom to sell and get high. Took weed, coke, and cash.
i use to work at a special event place in the kitchen, don't piss people off.
>>674132357
kek. HE TOOK BULLETS FOR YOU SIR. HE IS A HERO
>>674131656
Blister really? That's really more common for burns it must be bad, you can bandage it just note that if you find out you're allergic to it the heat from the bandage is gonna make it absorb into your skin faster.
>>674132386
Eh, google will help you more than us. All we do for dudes is sell Fleshlights, cockrings, porno and supplements.
Just quit being a manager at good old GameStop, something much better paying came along. Ask me stuff and I'll answer very truthfully.
I'm a cop and "keep" confiscated stuff regularly.
usually weed or pocketknifes I like
>>674132447
Iraq took my soul.
I'm a biostatistician for a mid-sized drug company. Lots of drugs are borderline placebos and do very little.
>>674131691
Holy shit dude that is a nice box! I just started in the trade, and Im goddam drooling.
>>674132571
ah dammit that sucks, thanks anyway.
>>674132627
maybe try not being a pussy
>>674122556
cart pusher here
for all you faggots who park in a way that doesnt let me get a cart, I don't hesitate to pull it out if that means scratching your car
>>674132595
I'm sure something better came along. You say it like it's some mystery. Nobody gets rich at GameStop.
So back to your question: how many teenage boys did you molest?
>>674132048
Italian houseparty sung by a jew
>>674132627
What did you see
I work at a big data company.
We have literally no idea what we are doing. Everything is disorganized, we have no idea how to market our product or even how to use it ourselves.
What we did is buy other smaller big data companies and then steal their technology, fire all their workers and then live off of their former business contacts.
>>674132180
Oh yeah.
Don't be afraid to rip into nurses, a lot of us think we know better then providers. Plus it's funny to see a doctor tear an RN an new asshole
>>674132412
I'm talking about the ip, ia, iraqi corrections, interpretors, contractors, visiting family etc. I rarely had problems with the prisoners.
>>674132310
Well we hire pretty much anyone, the only catch is that most of our managers DO hire based on looks.
If you look like an aborted fetus, we may hire you if our receiving staff needs supplementing but as a floor associate? No.
You have to be well dressed, speak politely, and have excellent grooming standards.
Our business thrives off of bridal registries, so to keep a pretty bride happy when walking the floor, you have to have a good looking gentleman or a pretty woman with them on the floor.
That or you're a nigger.
>>674132850
None but they're desperate for those rated M games, pretty funny when you tell them no.
I work as a cashier for Zaxbys. Anyone here from the south knows what I'm talking about.
My stores dinning room closes at 9PM every night. If someone comes in at 8:45 to eat in, you don't know how badly I'd like to actually throw them out of the store.
>>674129151
I worked in a hospital and I fucked this fine ass Mexican woman. One of the housekeeping staff
>>674130994
>watches instant karma comp videos.
>>674132908
How did you get the capital to acquire the smaller firms, though?
>>674123776
>I work at applebees
>>674132874
Someone didn't respect my gender neutrality and called me a faggot.
Ptsd to this day.
>>674132845
And you rightfully should
>>674127903
>I can afford 10 dollars a year on toothbrushes.
ooo, step aside for mr. moneybags here
>>674123776
God i hate waiters. They have the easiest job in the whole restaurant and think they can do shit like that because someone hurt their feelings they can all go fuck themselves.
>>674131179
>Gloves don't work unless they're changed frequently.
> some cases can take up to 72 hours to incubate
Found the guy with actual experience.
>>674123288
the american education system everyone
if you even understood what a germ was you'd know how fucking stupid you sound
Most of the code that runs the system thousands of people use every day was copy pasted by kids fresh out of college and was written years earlier by kids also fresh out of college.
Question for mangers Retail/Fast food
Do you guys really hire based off looks. Also would you hire a young girl with no experience compared to a older guy with some?
>>674124981
Can jet fuel melt steel beams?
>>674133119
Venture capital.
