Post your religion, get roasted.
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Post your religion, get roasted.
athiest
Jewish
muslim
4chan
wiccan. come at me
mormon
wicca
>>671939300
My nigga
buddhist
jewish
Dudeist
>>671939376
Do you actually believe anything that book says?
islam
Mormon
>>671939191
>roasted
>muslim
pick one
muslims can't have roasted meats
>>671939191
rip
feminist
Satanist (theistic)
>>671939058
Greek Orthadox
Heathen
>>671939562
not necessarily. the book is extremely outdated just as any other religious text is.
religion is interpreted too much by text written by some skeleton.
Catholic
Begin
>>671939058
Reddit-tier thread tbh
>>671939300
Fellow Wiccan/Pagan living in Salem
Blessed Be Anon
>>671939784
nordic, correct?
>>671939703
How's 7th grade going for ya, m8
Church of the Swollen Testicles.
>>671939191
>>671939376
>>671939595
>>671939604
Bullshit, you faggots wouldn't be here if you were.
>>671939058
what the fuck, i'm watching too many cooks right now.
>>671939928
hi there!!!! theres one other wicca/n anon here. surprised to see so many jfc (bc three is a lot)
and salem???? fr???? holy fuck
Judaism
Agnostic
>>671939058
Panthiest
baptist
cult of the black pharaoh
>>671939058
Buddhist
>>671939928
Are there many other wiccans in Salem? Even though it might make sense I doubt it for some reason.
>>671939058
Jainism
>>671940215
hello, ra- oh, i mean ted cruz
Pagan
>>671940215
Hello Ted Cruzodiac killer
>>671939300
>>671939440
>>671939928
We need more wicca/pagan threads
>>671940622
check em, you have been blessed.
and agreed
>>671940177
It's pretty awesome tbh. Laurie Cabot literally walked past me on Christmas night when I was high as fuck. Good times. Where you at anon?
>>671940017
Here's my book of Mormon bound in my standard issue Mormon necktie
>>671940349
>>671940622
go to /x faggot
>>671940622
>We need more wicca/pagan threads
Just make a fat, lonely and wears black thread.
Satanist
>JoSser
>Only reliable source I can find for betterment of self, post better resources if you know them
>currently all I can do is fucking store energy and clean my own chakras
>>671940837
Kek
>>671940752
That doesn't prove shit, I could get one right now http://www.amazon.com/Book-Mormon-Another-Testament-Christ/dp/1592975003/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1456976976&sr=8-3&keywords=book+of+mormon
>>671940809
/x/ hates us too
Heathens can be real assholes
>>671940837
Nice meme
>>671940752
How about your mom's bible? Maybe a pic with her standard issue Mormon panties?
None are true.
>>671940752
How does your God let you browse?
How does it feel to bang 4 hoes at once??
Agnostic
>>671940622
Yes. Tbh fam
>>671940922
>JoS
>reliable source
Im a Pastafarian
Comment
>>671941215
>>671940971
What the freak did you just flipping say about me, you little Apostate? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in Seminary, and I’ve been involved in numerous splits with the Elders, and I have over 300 confirmed baptisms. I am trained in the Commitment Pattern and I was the top converter in the entire Church. You are nothing to me but just another unfaithful servant. I will dust my feet at you with precision the likes of which has never been seen before upon the face of the Earth, mark my freaking words. You think you can get away with saying that "anti" stuff to me over the Internet? Think again, brother. As we speak I am contacting my sacred network of Danites across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the brimstone, maggot. The brimstone that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re flipping dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can cast you out in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in the laying on of hands, but I have access to the Signs and Tokens of the Holy Temple and I will use them to their full extent to smite your miserable kiester all the way to Kolob, you little turd. If only you could have known what holy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would not have spoken ill of the Lord's Anointed. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you stinking idiot. I will let Satan's water wash over you and you will drown in it. You’re flipping dead, kiddo.
>>671939058
I do anal because i love jesus
I worship smitty werbenjagermanjensen
Praise the Dark Lord Chin Chin!!!
>>671940809
/x/ is awful. Only good real ufo sightings thread I've ever been in was on /b/ that I started. Went for hours. Even the military (supposedly) got in on it
Jedi
>>671941215
Don't you fucking dare
Agnostic
>>671940752
>>671941024
>Nice meme
Its the truth. Besides a couple hippie kitchen witches most pagans are fruity, lonely, broke and usually just wear black. I used to sling coffee in a pagan coffee shop and the meme is reality.
>>671941163
Fucking give me something then. I really don't want to invokate "Satan" but it's eventually going to be my only option unless I can find someone else to help me with this.
>>671940752
>scribbled out 3rd
Fucking Mormons can't figure out the day
>>671941306
>>671941352
>>671941331
Underage b&
>>671941388
I guess it's all about who you associate with
Iglecia ni Cristo
>>671941331
HE WAS NUMBER ONE
>>671940351
Yes. There are a lot. everything from nature lovers to Crowley heads
Hindunesee
>>671940971
Who else other than a Mormon would have this many fucking ties
i worship chaos
>>671941352
fgt
>>671941589
That episode is like over ten or fifteen years old i was a kid when i saw it and i wasnt even the guy who posted that
>>671939185
>>671941737
>>671939185
>be kike
>get gassed
>>671941674
Why do faggots lik that have to perpetuate the fucking stereotype.
IT DIDN'T HAPPEN. IT IS A BOOK.
LOOK UP THE CRUCIBLE.
READ IT.
KILL YOURSELF.
>>671941806
>>671941767
Edgy af m8
>>671941877
>>671940735
wa. theres "wiccans" here but theyre mostly tumblr cunts who like to sit in their room all day and use it as an excuse to get money to buy crystals and light candles.
also theyre retarded.
but theres some cool wicca shops around seattle, with some good texts.
>>671940064
It takes a lot to make a stew
>>671941737
I guess you're tied up
>>671941873
That was 320 years ago.
This is now.
>>671941986
Bokononist here. Ask. Me anything
>>671941986
DONT FUCKING START
I follow Hellenism.
>>671941822
I am mistaken; I saw it somewhere else and assumed it was a reference to that and not in itself a reference to something else.
>>671939058
>>671941737
Me (a banker.)
>>671942083
*flashbacks*
Hinduism
Also i should probably mention im a white american
>>671941975
Yeh tbh I've never wished for anything for myself as a pagan. Would never practice magik for monetary gain, etc.
Whos from Wesboro
agnostic
>>671939172
spelled it wrong you idiot.
>>671941986
A touch of salt and laughter too
>>671942083
Somebody just discovered too many cooks
>>671941667
KEKled
>>671942240
POO IN LOO
Oden loves you now die in battle.
>>671939058
LaVeyan.
>>671941612
>I guess it's all about who you associate with
Yeah we would get all sorts of pagan/wiccan/magician types. Most were nice enough but all were fucking basket cases. One girl used to "see" fairies every where. She was fucking loony toons but damn if she couldn't suck a dick. I got her to rim me once by convincing her a sprite flew up my anus. True story.
>>671939058
The best of the one true religions.
>>671941873
Have you ever been to Salem? It's all over the place.
>>671939058
I'm a Jungian mystic. I'm not sure if that qualifies as a religion, since I'm also an atheist in most senses of the word. I believe that the gods reside as archetypal symbols which reside in the collective unconscious, built into the structure of the brain and shared through morphic resonance.
>>671942261
thats what i always thought was the point. but, now that tumblr got ahold of it theres subsections of witches all associated by color.
like, you and me wouldn't be just wiccan anymore. we'd be "white witches, the minor kind that dont really dabble in the belief"
i hate it that everything has to become selfish. everytime ive practiced spells its been for the benefit or curse of another. never myself
agnostic.
>>671942417
Odin you ignorant fuck. youll never end up in valhalla
>>671939962
kek
>>671942520
It's tough being a witch m8
>>671939058
Im mormon and from utah
>>671942745
Wotan you slavic untermensch.
I'm Jewish (Israeli), pls don't be mean.
Odinist
Illuminist
>>671942603
>curse of another
Careful what you put out there. x3
>>671942603
That is fucking ridiculous. What the hell happened to tumblr. There was a time you could go on omegle type in tumblr and have a decent chance of seeing some tits.
>>671942878
I know.... I know.
islam the true final message of god
>>671939058
Atheist
Believing in religion is for people who don't want to take up responsibilities
Agnostic atheist
>>671939300
>>671939440
>>671939696
>>671939703
>>671939928
>>671940177
>>671940241
>>671940306
>>671940328
>>671940622
>>671940733
>inb4 obese
>>671942925
wrong.
>>671943042
Threefold . MY FUCKIN NIGGA!!! (Salem /b/ro)
>>671939546
Faggeist?
Hi experienced Wiccan here. I've been having a lot of trouble lately with my rituals. I've been missing a couple of infredients, and I can't find anywhere to get them from. I tried ordering them on Amazon but they run out of stock. I asked some friends if they had any, but they just looked at me funny! So I just tried using my magic wand to summon some ingredients. I swung it a couple times, but it flew out of my hand and into my top hat. I freaked out and went to reach for it but i couldn't feel it in the hat. I kept feeling around but I couldn't get hold of anything, that's when I fell into my top hat. Lucky for me my pixie dust was at the bottom, to break my fall! My broom was down there as well, so I was able to fly back out. By the time I got out I found that I had run really low on mana, so I still have to drink some tree sap. Anyways if someone can tell me an easier way to get ingredients that would be great! Happy Wiccaning!
>>671943242
says the atheist...
>>671942354
>ending a sentence fragment with a period
Wiccan and satanists are attention seeking faggots
>>671942432
How's that angst treating you?
>>671941331
he was #1
>>671943187
>islam the true final message of god
and God's message was: "So far I've got them to believe I had a son by knocking up a virgin and then having him die for them. Now I'm going to convince them that a sand nigger fell down a well and chaos must ensue to get him out. If they fall for this one I was going to have a guy pretend to read some fake golden tablets out of a hat. Shit is going to be cash"
>>671939454
Same
Wicca thread
>>671943514
>>671943042
that i will. never where it was not 'asked for'
>>671943062
yeah, uh, socialism became a prominent thing again. its like ppl forgot about what has happened in the past....wow. what a shock
Church of Milo (nero)
>>671943436
Wiccan here. Kek.
>>671939058
Hello, feel like posting more never ending stories memes with religious babbling faggot?
>>671943242
>Atheist
>Believing in religion is for people who don't want to take up responsibilities
Believing Atheism isn't a religion as it might diminish your perceived intellectual superiority.
>>671943730
Let me guess, you use socialism and communism interchangeably?
>>671939058
baptist.
>>671943887
Same faggoting alart! Same faggoting alartSame faggoting alart! Same faggoting alart! Same faggoting alart!
Haven't seen one yet - we're kinda rare anyways. I'm a Thelemite. Thelema is pretty great. If you don't know about it, you might want to look into it. It's made my life a shitton better.
>>671942855
So I did read correctly about how Jews circumcise with their mouths?
>>671939058
Pastafarian
Islam
muslim-shia, google "ashura shia" to know more
>>671943259
i dont get it what you mean by inb4 obese?
>>671939058
My religion is autism, give me special attention.
>>671944064
You point to one post and claim same fagging? Hello new friend, I shall name you potato.
My whole family are Jehovah's Witnesses, and I was too until three years ago.
>>671944233
>>671943460
Where is your argument?
>>671944264
Wiccans are often stereotyped as fat girls
>>671944342
Shutup you same faggot.
>>671943887
Is dead an age?
Off a TV channel?
>>671944488
>Stereotyped
I wish I could find a hot pagan girl that would like to experiment with kundalini. Even if I could find one I bet my wife wouldn't appreciate it.
>>671942589
Wow, you are so smart and superior to all of us, and I am sure you would get good grades if you applied yourself honey.
>>671944617
you shut up you big doo doo head poopy face bum licker! Don't make me go ALL CAPS on your ass!
>>671939703
Yeah the edgy pic looks like some 7th grade emo kid art.
>>671944632
T>>671944866
Fuck you m8 I drew that in shit 7th grade while sucking my black emo boyfriends dick!
>>671944728
>>671944632
Atheism is a label just like Christianity, Islam, Buddhism.... If you don't believe in any religion then you simply don't believe. You believe in Atheism and to believe in nothing also requires a leap of faith. Do you get together with other Atheists for discussion? If so then hello congregation.
>>671944488
isn't that some satanic bull shit tumblr thing?
>>671945110
>black
>emo
damn that's like finding a wart on my gf's dick
>>671944739
You would get arrested by the police before you can get within 10 millimeters of her soft skin, you might as well rapd here at night on her way to school.
>>671939058
Not brainwashed
>>671945110
Cry some more
>>671945392
What are you smoking and can I have some?
>>671945415
Raise your hands if you'd rape a pegan at night on her way home, and if she doesn't have a home, capture her and force her to be your sex slave, that would be awesome.
>>671943187
which one out of the 9000 gods in the world?
Satanist, atheistic / LaVeyan.
>>671945668
You dont even believe your own religion.
>>671945852
>rape a pegan
Where can I find a pegan and do you have a picture of one?
>>671945985
What?
>>671945985
No one here does
>>671945852
*Raises hand :)
up your asshole*
>>671939058
None. Not even agnostic.
>>671945852
Fuck off
>>671945280
No that's just not true
Christianity islam etc are doctrines they are a set of beliefs
Atheism is not a set of beliefs
It's the lack of a set of beliefs. Being an atheist doesn't indicates what ones beliefs are, it indicates what they are not. You can't believe in atheism since atheism isn't something to believe in. It's merely a descriptor of the belief status of someone just like how an empty bank account doesn't indicate anything about how much someone makes in a year.
>>671946209
I'll take that as a yes.
>>671940241
Yeah agnostic
>>671946317
Women don't rape other women, pussies can't penetrate other pussies without a cock of some kind. Feminism at it's finest, it's a religion of vagina.
>>671946216
>It's the lack of a set of beliefs.
Intentionally lacking a set of beliefs is in itself a set of beliefs.It is a tough concept to grasp but one day you'll get it. Atheism is just a catch phrase for "intellectual" and I'm just waiting for them to start throwing around the word "bourgeois".
>>671946703
A religion of vagina? You sir, are as high as a faggot.
>>671946966
And you suck mommy's dick like the errand boy you are inbred to be
>>671947197
Fuck you faggonator! I'm only half inbred.
Everybody ITT is a MASSIVE FAGGOT; you fags have religions/ideologies lol
my solution's pictured and i don't even do the -ism part you fucks
>>671939546
Got ordained as a minister last year. Welcome dude.
Roman Catholic
>>671947899
Was your bunghole ever bungled by a priest?
>>671946216
Atheism is by far the easiest religion to fuck with
Pastafarian
>>671945874
i suppose it's the one that make sense to whom ever truly seek to find god, we as Muslims believe that every religion is man made except for the ones that had there books, we call them "ahel al-ketab", those are the Jews and Christians, but they all fucked with with their books, and misled the people for there own selfish needs.
>>671949107
>this
Agnostic
None but i do believe that there might be something or someone that created us maybe i dunno
>>671939058
lapsed Catholic
