Good evening, Anonymous!
You know the drill by now, right? Advice, fortune-telling, and friendly conversation found here!
>trips asks a question for the Hermetic Tarot, gets a detailed reading
Got a question for the tarot? I'll give you four card reading in honor of two times two.
>Cheyenne has bad luck this year. Lucky keywords: "Money", "21".
>open front door
>fucking giant package
>wont fit through door
>my new legionary shit
My day has been grand. How about yours?
Doing great! New opportunities just opened up for me today, so I'm pretty hyped. Everything seems to be coming together right now.
Sorry about that. As a consolation, how about you ask a question and I draw one card for you? It's enough to get a vague omen, at least!
Well, its slow today so you might be lucky.
I'm doing great. Got some swords and finished the first half of inFamous 2
Now here's a guy who knows what's up.
Making money off of art opportunities. It seems I might be able to make this NEET lifestyle work after all.
Where's the armor you dumbo?
So i think we just realised who the illegal alien is..
>picks up Marisa
>squirms around in Reimu's hold
>rubs cheeks with Marisa and holds tight
Nothing, just saying hi!
Now, lets not jump to conclusions, I am most certainly a human, a normal human, like any other human
(and to some degree I expected
that I was going to be the Lucky 12th Caller)
I-I don't mind that... at all~
You silly shrines maiden..
THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT AN ALIEN WOULD SAY!
Shes not here every single day (or shes on later during the day)
She should be busy doing her own thread right now. If not, I don't know.
Mm.. I didn't think it was that silly.
>examines Marisa's legs carefully
Not as quiet as the love i got for y-
That doesn't quite work...
>sits back down to rethink her wordplays
Aah.. W-What are you doing..?
>looks around the shrine embarrassed
Oh.. n-nones around..
I havn't ordered it yet. It's pretty expensive, so ill have to wait a while.
A-Ahn.. P-People are coming in Reimu..
By pretending to be the alien you think i'd see you as "Too easy so it couldn't possibly be right" WELL YOUR WRONG.
Aliens are smart enough to disguise themselves as themselves! you fkn xeno! Where is Heresy-chan when you need him!
Would you cuddle with a 10/10 cute skellington who just wants to feel a human touch again just once?
Alice isn't here, dummy. You really think someone has the time to be both of us?
Ah... but... but...
>spooky scary skeletons
I am broke.
Its ok. I'm not frightened!
Did I spook you?
Alice and Reimu. Why'd you call me Alice?
You're pretty much the third coming, but your threads are slow and disappointing.
Oh, right. Well, I'm not trying to be her. I'll have fun whether a lot of people come or not.
some idiot linked this as an alice thread in a third party board
I thought Alice2 was here.
Well I'm just going to trawl through every fetid corner till I find her.
Er... let's just say there were multiple Alices, doing the same thing you are, and I'm like one of the many filthy scribes who chart the history and mayhem that is avatarfag circlejerking.
There is you, there was Alice 2, Haikus... the fortune/advice thing sorta gets handed amongst generations.
Now tell me my fortune!
Well, is not my fault I'm dumb, is the alcohol.
I can probably think of a couple of idiots it could be. This has nothing to do with that other than that she shows up every now and then.
>Daft Punk ha***tremely good luck this year. Lucky keywords: "Void", "30".
It seems the gods liked my nickname for you. Congratulations!
Sorry to bother, won't happen again. @_@
it's cool bro
maybe we can take these over if they don't get banned too hard
no wai you know that asshat?
L-Look at all the people..!!
You're going to have to take care of all of them~
There is something less than broke though
Oh hello there
I do. She's a friend, but I like to stay out of her past since it's all hearsay and conjecture.
You're kidding, right? The only people here are looking for Alice. Screw that.
>takes Marisa to hidden futon
I'll decide who it's time to take care of.
like how he lied about being a girl
and being burned in a house fire?
I've visited a few planets outside of this Solar System, and none of them had any inhabitants.
Why do you think this is?
I had a rather vivid thought, not a dream, but I actually thought it was happening, and had happened, for a little bit.
This is what occured in my thought.
I went to one nice planet, it was chiller than Earth, and had very few craters. I was planning on making some bacteria or something. Adrian was there. I mentioned that he shouldn't be able to survive on the planet, seeing as the atmosphere did not have enough Oxygen, and he said "Well, maybe I'm just not a cocksucking blueberry like you."
I told him that his haircut looked like a stupid fucking mound of peanut butter, and he got mad. Right as I was about to try and create some microorganisms, Veidt shot me with an odd gun he had made (something like the S.Q.U.I.D tech), removing my Intrinsic Field. (It didn't work the first time, and didn't work when he tried it on Earth.)
Then, I was in some sort of void, and Bubastus was there. She could talk, I don't know why, and she told me that creating another being like myself would be a good idea.
I reformed myself, told Adrian that he was a little fucker, and tried to make another one of me. I ended up bringing back the people that Adrian had poisoned and disposed of with his I.F Subtractor, but they weren't human, just screaming mounds of flesh. I blew them up because they looked like they were really suffering.
Then Adrian got scared and literally pissed his pants.
I don't know what it all meant.
Lemme ask you this. How would I, the Shrine Maiden of Paradise, ever know if any of that was true or not?
It's not like I can confirm it, so who cares.
Wrong thread for that, mate.
>Shrine Maiden of Paradise
That's possibly worse than me calling myself #The Legend
Written it down on a sticky note so I won't forget.
Came here because I also felt absolutely horrible. Normally I would be posting blind drunk. 2sad2drink, 2sad4bed, just nice enough to post in fortune bread.
No, but she is the captain of a meglodeath space station that hosts many, many pods of mechaneko murdermachines.
That is pretty evil tho.
Ah.. okay.. lead the way~!
I agree with Reimu on this one, Lies or not it doesn't matter
I didn't make up the title. Go smack ZUN-kun.
>the Shrine Maiden of Paradise
is that your steam name?
sorry i don't have namesink loaded
do you have a really obnoxious name rn?
there is never a wrong thread
pretty confirmed hear say tbh
Point him out, and it shall be done. I love bopping silly field mice on the head.
Perfect mood to be here. I won't hold it against you since you say it was a mistake.
>6 + 666
Marisa, you win! Ask a question for the tarot!
Was gonna make out with ya but fortune telling awaits!
My name is Reimu.
>1) Go to Japan.
>2) Find the most drunkest Japanese man in his 30's... or has he hit the big 4 yet?
>3) smack away
>4) Tell him to stop adding newhous because Reimu has a hard time keeping up with all of their names.
Tbh, if it was Alice2, I would've posted absolute nonsense, yelling 'TIME IS A FLAT CIRCLE. FROM THE DIRT WE CAME, DIRT WE WILL RETURN' and try to summon old eldritch horrors of breads before time.
Err... got any advice on how not to feel like shit?
The first step is analyzing why you feel like shit to begin with. Why do you think that might be?
HERP THE UNHERPABLE
DERP THE UNDERPBABLE
Okay, my question is "Should i change"
I'll eagerly await your response~
You can convince me by removing that guard helmet of yours and show your true face you scum!
You're sitting on an anonymous board expecting somene to take you seriously and tell you only truth, I don't know man but i can tell you this. I once slayed a dragon.
I feel less like shit now that I'm on some damn fine medication. Also, faking being a very confident, outgoing, not insane person works too. Try that, do it long enough, and you'll start to be the person you're pretending to be after a bit. For the most part.
I mean, if there's anyone who'd be into that, it's her.
Are you the same guy who always says that?
I got kicked out of the local community radio show because I was literally 'too auts for an 80s themed radio show that only pulled in 12 people as audience'. However, they didn't tell me straight as the kind anon above you, but rather waited for a week and got a word from the manager of the youth club saying 'Yeah, he wants to restructure the show how it was, you shouldn't come this day'.
Plus cats pissed on my backpack.
...fucking loved my backpack.
Tried to clean it but you know, nothing removes cat piss. Thought I'd blast it with fabric cleaner before taking my docs into the office, nope, stunk the place out. Great shame, wanted to commit sudoku.
Oh yeah, and didn't come up with my own radio show in time, dude thought I had the idea by Friday. Oh well.
Have Hex lewds
Nah, can't, my problems aren't that huge to say that I have to fake being normal. I'm just fucking awkward. I just need a slap over the head, really.
This, and that idea for the most part is pretty Nito. Otherwise try and find what makes you specifically happy in your spare time, music, creativity, drugs or fucking bitches but just don't overthink what time you may not have.
Her socks are barely visible in that picture. I don't hate you for that, it just seems illogical that socks could be considered 'incredible' when hardly even seen. That is why it if fetishposting. I don't consider it shitposting, just illogicalposting.
Make this Anon donate a million dollars if he wants your socks.
ALOLOLO HE MAD WHOA LOOKOUT WE GOT A BADASS HERE MISTER ANON LEGUN BEHIND HIS 7 PROXYS O SHI...FAGET
Where is the Alice thread?
>Assuming caps lock is cruise control for cool
If that's it, then get some friends that'll help you with your problems.
>Question: Should Marisa change?
>Method: Reimu's Mini Celtic Cross
>Ruler of Flux and Reflux
Upright - Imagination. Dreams and psychic impressions. Sometimes psychic work. Illusions. Inability to see things clearly sometimes resulting in personal depression. Sometimes signifies fiction writing or acting, particularly work in the entertainment industry. Losing control of one's daily life. The unconscious mind.
This is you, right now.
>King of Wands
>Prince of the Chariot of Fire
Upright - A charming, responsible, loyal, entertaining, witty, honest, conscientious and generous person. A lover of the home and family life. A very passionate and virile man who is good at moral support and encouragement. When pushed or provoked he acts without hesitation, but can sometimes find this hard as he can often see both sides of an argument.
>Princess of Pentacles
>Princess of the Echoing Hills
Ill Dignified or Reversed - A person with no sense of humour and full of his own importance. A person who enjoys the power he wields over those below him. Depending upon the surrounding cards there may be some unwelcome news concerning monetary matters.
And that's what you would become if you changed! Doesn't sound good, does it? Never change, Marisa~
I've been looking for that shit for like 3 hours, man. Pretty sure I'm gonna walk away disappointed, and you probably will too.
Where is she?
You too huh? Well we can be disappointed together.
You have been visited by The Shifty Drifter. If you don't respond to this post in ALL CAPS, you will never be able to type a capital letter ever again.
Very well then.
>Slowly pulls off
>Face is actually a large, head sized, sweet roll devoid of facial features
>I, am Sweet Roll
>My origin is unknown
>but my purpose is clear
>I must acquire sweet rolls, even if it must be done with petty theft
>The exact reason why... is also unknown
>I, am Sweet Roll
>THIS IS WHO I AM
It sounds like you've just had a bad time lately, which is completely temporary. My advice is to drink, smoke, or do whatever vice is your personal one. Hang out here with us for a while, and most of all, have some fun!
That's the best remedy for a lot of things, but especially this.
I wish. Look at those breasts.
And here I thought you'd left me for Reisen.
THRIFTY SHIFTY, DRIFTER
Yeah, I was gonna do the drink, but I may just post here till I'm good n' ready to sleep and like... plaster everything up.
Usually I'd be annoyed for a week and have everything sorted then so...
thanks for putting up with my nonsense.
>Bows in respect
Thank you oh mighty sage~
>looks in awe at the big donuty shaped ring of sweetness
Well then... You're clean..
This is a nice thing. Thank you based anon.
It's always good to have company in disappointment.
No problem. I'm pretty sure I did some crazy things a couple of nights ago when I ended up staying up all night.
I don't think anyone will mind. Hope I could help!
If you're gonna be petty about it, you're just confirming that I was right to never give you more than my name.
Bye bye, fuckface. Nice knowing you.
Thread therapy best therapy.
Have more spooky 2D girl lewds.
Oh, and err... if you all are big on names and use a namesync thing... well, you can call me SCANNER. I moved from this board onto other dumb things. Most notably onto online boardgames.
I'm not. Namesync is from a generation before me, and in my opinion it was part of their downfall. I'd rather keep it simple and just trust Anonymous not to be too much of a dick.
I have to, I'm a fortune teller. It'd be pretty lame if I didn't, right?
I don't have anything that can pass off as a bemused and nonchalant shrugs in my folders which can encapsulate my answer.
Which is a shame, because I have a lot of other dumb shit that makes no sense but can still be used in context.
Ergo, pajeets on train.
Oh. I do hope the following days treat you better.
Did something go wrong?
Don't worry about it. Someone I added on Steam and, despite my gut telling me otherwise, befriended.
They got upset that I'm not at their beck and call and decided to turn heel.
That's all I'll say about it since even that much was giving them too much regard.
a more diverse crowd instead off most of the regulars (well, maybe a little bit of the regulars, and a little bit of newcomers, i dunno)
going to be an interesting night, maybe
Do any of you want to join Cards against Humanity?
Good interesting or bad inter-
I wanna live in your crotch forever, you modern day prometheus.
Best idea all day.
Yes. Did you set up a game on http://pretendyoure.xyz/zy/?
Now, back to business...
My ilk are sorta into some with shoggoth shit.
Like... old ancient covenants with demibeings not of this earth, passed along by the warm breezes of the summer solstice.
I don't know, it's like a sword that can pierce anything going up against a shield that can't be pierced
It could end up good or bad, but you still might want to see how it goes down
I lost in my CS:GO competitive match because my teammates are so suck at defending the bomb sites.
Well if you're into some strange, I could get some more newfriends later in the week, and a few cans, and we can both watch this planecrash in slow motion.
Much more interesting than to say 'old crazy shitposters comin' for summer lovin'
One sec, setting it up.
>Colin ha***tremely bad luck this year. Lucky keywords: "Void", "36".
Jeez! That's bad... uhh... I'll try and give you more, as a consolation. Here's a tarot card.
>Nine of Pentacles
>The Lord of Material Gain
Upright - The enjoyment of hard earned success. Financial gains made from unexpected sources, such as: monetary gifts, winnings, inheritances and settlements. Unearned income possibly from a divorce settlement. Popularity, common sense and order arising out of chaos
What I'm seeing is that you're going to see some material gains of some kind, whether it be money, power, social clout, or something like that... but it's not going to make up for HOW you get it. You'll feel unfulfilled by it because whatever you traded for it wasn't worth it.
downlowding scripts when you're drunk is always harder when it needs to be
Weren't you going to play cards with the others?
I-I mean i'd rather do this..
I'm calling it. Either it has something to do with shit drugs, cocks or GOTY.
Why would you say that?
Marisa is always very nice.
One post, to the one thread I lurk in. You're out of line and manipulative.
I knew something was wrong and I trusted you anyway. Then on the odd occasion I'm around you call me out for someone elses bullshit.
I bid you good day.
Bell hasn't started the game yet. Besides, I need a kiss for luck. A lot of luck.
>kisses Marisa firmly
Dignity, freedom, a parent... who knows what he's gonna trade, but he won't like it.
I'm never sure what to send someone off with after an "extremely bad"... Best of luck? Hope I was wrong?
Heh... well, come back by anytime if you need company to suffer through it with ya.
>tfw you trade your dad in for Euro Truck Simulator 2014
>Returns the kiss
Good luck honey~<3
There.. There is another Marisa that hangs out in Alice's threads
Which i'm sadly not..
Believe it or not I'm still glad to hear it!
What the fuck are you talking about?
Oh god... now that's extremely bad.
You being passive aggressive then pretending to be ignorant. I didn't call you out for it and even if someone did- you've made it apparent before. :/ I don't get it but this is your thing: I wouldn't ruin that, I was just checking up on you.
You said the thing about steam so I assume you were bitching at me but I blocked you so now you don't have to have me 'expect' at your beck and call. :/ I just wanted to play vidya
When I tell a grand total of two people my real name, and it shows up in my thread, I know which one it was. I can only guess at why, and that's my best guess.
If that was your idea of joking, it's not funny.
I.. I have no idea what i've done to deserve such treatment..
Is it that you two also wants good luck kisses?
H-Help! The Alice regulars think i'm some mean doppleganger and refuses to listen to me!
oh shit man
is it wrong that i don't even know the RIGHT marisa
classic case of mistaken autists
Y-You too Mr.Tp
yeah i guess that one was just sad but would never admit it
Because I didn't want to tell you at first, and only after being asked several dozen times and ways did I finally decide that maybe it wouldn't be so bad to trust you.
So yeah, it wasn't smart. If you weren't doing it out of malice, then I'm sorry to have assumed it. But it's still not cool.
well im helping sort that out
maybe just a bit, the marisa you're thinking of might be found on /pol/ nowadays
I knew you weren't that Risa. It doesn't change my opinion. I'm fairly certain that you're a slag, running quietly through the night, hiding in the dark so as to not be seen.
Man, it went way beyond being sad. Dude went full /pol/ at the end, started doing some holocaust denying type shit.
sorry for the mistaken identity
i mean it WOULD help if your retard ass used an original av
To be honest, dude, I'm like 80% certain there are no/very few original avatars anymore. I think we even had somebody working the tyler perry gimmick you're working at some point.
DRUNKEN BLACK DUDES
AND CARDS AGAINST HUMANITY
oh, and caps lock
fuck man let's go there
this marisa is boring af
Back when I was a teenager, I used to have fun exploring the internet, but now I feel so bored of it. /b/ is mostly porn and forums are dead, so I don't know where to go. Has anyone else felt like this?
Reimu, I want to go to sleep so the morning comes faster, but I'm afraid because my dreams are always not nice. I'm afraid that tonight's will be especially bad because I watched something that was sad and scary today. Everyone i could talk to is asleep right now. What should I do?
833785235 is my number you fuck fuck. Shit to get the most popular 6-7 stulyest I have been busy with the kids at bontier the cafe in the but I don't think so much to say the word Over-Encombered there was no nigger are going well bye batches.
You can't really get a persons personality by just exchanging once sentence, people are more fleshed out than that, So giving me this fake personality without actually finding out my real one just seems lazy..
Yep. It's why I shifted over to posting on sites that are relevant to my interests. Pro wrestling communities make me a happy camper. Maybe try finding something like that.
Try watching something fun, or playing a videogame you enjoy before going to bed. Alternatively, take some benadryl and jack off.
I don't particularly want to not be lazy, tbh