hey faggots I just bought this thing for my girlfriend. how'd I do?
also I need ideas for funny/embarrassing ways to propose to her. I know she'll say yes regardless so might as well make it fun, right?
Dress aup as Zelda and aske her to be your female Zelda.
>>682635223
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7QH20M7gG0c
>>682635223
Put it around your small ass dick and get her to get on her knees to blow you, pull it out and say 'marry me bitch'
>>682635223
Very pretty ring anon. Early congratulations. Well that depends what does your gf like? What does she find funny. Use that to make your proposal fun and sweet for her.
>>682635397
I'm probably missing the joke here because I never got into video games but isn't Zelda a female?
>>682635447
that hurt my brain :(
>>682635223
>not getting gold
>>682635223
Try relating back to good times you've already had. Go out to the first restaurant you took her to or something.
>>682635223
Small basic ring. You didn't do well at all. I don't know why you're looking for an embarrassing way to propose if proposing with that ring is embarrassing enough.
>>682635223
you are making a huge mistake
>>682635899
Dubs dont lie
>>682635577
this
>>682635577
it's small but not that small. bitch got tiny fingers
>>682635591
thank you, she likes cars and cats and enjoys me making an ass of myself in general so we might actually take her car out on a driving road I know she'll enjoy and I'll try to work it into that. like tell her there's something wrong with her car, pull over and pop the hood and be like "this fucking rock was stuck in the belt" or something. that's the only idea I've had so far
>>682635689
white gold nigga
>>682635782
lol the first restaurant we went to was Outback when we were 15 years old
>>682636111
Do it anyway.
>>682635859
sad
>>682635899
probably but she's put up with my shit for almost 10 years now and I'm starting to like her
Smash the ring in front of her
>>682635223
Don't do something funny or embarrassing. You'll regret it very quickly. Don't do it publicly either.
>>682636227
>'starting'
Yea, that's why people get married. Dumb faggot.
>>682635687
the joke is many people think links name is actually zelda
>>682636227
and in 5 more years you will have nothing
>>682635223
You should spend no less than 12 hours of hard work and brainstorming to find the best way to do it.
You could do things that make it look like your proposing to her but actually just asking a normie question then somewhere in there slip in a real proposal.
>>682635223
Fucking cheap ass, hope she tells you to fuck off,
Also stick it in your ass and get her to give you a rimjob, then shit it out on her tongue,
> romance
>>682635397
You never played zelda did you ?
Stick it up your ass before a date and when you guys finally get back to the bedroom
>Hey honey let's try something kinky, stick your finger up my ass, I want to feel my prostate
>Oooh OK honey
>Mind if this black gigolo rails you as I jerk off?
>Oh honey you made me the happiest woman alive
>Here's one better, if you go a little deeper I'll give you everything I own
>Oh my god, a ring!? I love it
>(Jerome) Nice ring brah, can I put it on my cock as I rail your new fiancée?
>>682635223
So many dubs and trips OP. I think that is a good omen.
>>682635223
wait for her to come home
be on bed, buck naked, ass up in the air, with giant nigger dildo hanging out of ass with ring squeezed around nigpenishead
tell her to "work" you till you shit (hard)
when she finishes and pulls it out, yell "suprise" and start flinging your feces at her face
win?
>>682635223
kill yourself beta
>>682635223
Tell her you felt wome kind of lump in her vag and go with her to the gynecologist. When she's getting check have the doctor say "ohhh here's the problem" with the ring in his/her hand like he just digged it out of her pussy. My english sucks deal with it
>>682636792
I'd actually thought about something like this. I've been dangling it in her face for a long time now so she has no idea when it's actually coming, about a month from now we're going on vacation and I'll probably do it then but I've been thinking about just fucking with her all week first and then doing it right before we head home
>>682635223
Hey man congratulations! Just got married last year, hope it works out perfect for you bro!
My proposal was pretty lame but it worked out fine.
>>682636890
Great minds think alike
> hive mind
>>682636889
I haven't played it in years. Oh yea you got Zelda who is not the main character. Zelda is the princess/ninja then you got link who is the lill green faggert you play as.
>>682635223
you bough this for your girlfriend
what did she buy for you?
that's right, you're a faggot
and that defines your whole relationship
have fun with your future full of misery and sadness
>>682635223
thats kind of small...
>>682636845
she told me not to spend more than 2 grand, I spent almost exactly that, blow me
>>682636890
she tried playing with my ass once and wasn't into it :(
>>682636955
boom
>>682637160
Its for a 14 year old, so it's about the right size.
>>682635223
If you don't already live together try it for two weeks and see how many times you can do what you want
>>682637160
I'll bet you hear that a lot, huh?
>>682637232
She squirt? If so pop a ring on it, if not then keep on moving.
>>682635397
>>682637076
Please just fuck off
>shit in cake paper
>place ring in poop truffle
>refrigirate poop truffle
>feed poop truffle with ring to gf
>????????????
>profit
>>682637105
sorry all of your relationships have failed but mines been brety gud
>>682637251
well, it is the same size as the one I bought her when she was 15 anyway
>>682637328
we've lived together since 2012
>>682637005
I think in some ways your getting there. But it is a once and a lifetime thing and the more effort you put into planning the more likely it will be unique and special. Obvoiusly sometimes its hard to carry things out accoding to plan sometimes. You could talk to her friends about it in a real non obvious manner so they say something but then just be like no I was talking about this.
I might no be giving you the best advice though. I think there comes a time when trying to get someone to anticipate something just becomes emotionally fatiguing
>>682635223
You bought her a diamond, congrats on getting herbthe most useless piece of shit frivilously over priced, not special or rare gem stone on the face of the earth. Diamonds are forever, because we are never runnibg out of them.
>>682636227
Be careful anon, if she realizes you don't have any option but to stay with her, and that she has the power due to controlling your only supply of sex, she will feel like the dominant partner and will lose any attraction to you. Over time resentment will build up as you either bribe/negotiate/coerce/guilt her into having sex she doesn't want with you, and you not getting enough sex anymore.
Soon all she will see when she looks at you is an annoying, pathetic and needy chump.
She'll either 'give up' and put on weight, or get in shape looking to find someone better before she gets too old.
Always keep the image of power in the relationship. You can't negotiate desire. Stay in shape and stay social so that she knows you 'could' replace her if you wanted. A bit of anxiety motivates you both to make an effort to keep healthy and happy.
C U C K
U     C
C     U
K C U C
>>682637487
sorry you're a desperate pussy whipped loser with not balls
>>682637232
I once bought three hookers in Thailand. While I was banging one of them she stuck her finger in my butt. It was not pleasant. She got kinda deep in there too.
Don't ask what I was doing in Thailand.
>>682636227
>Desperation
>10 years of "putting up with my shit"
>Compromising entire life
Never go full cuck.
>>682637583
Do you know how many brown people died looking for them dimonds?
>>682637487
Dude, I was kidding about the 14yr old. I can tell your serious, holy shit.
>>682637907
That's why they're so valuable
>>682637652
C U C K
U C
C U
K C U C
>>682637907
About three-fiddy
>>682635223
There is nothing wrong with the ring. I obviously can't tell whether it is gold and diamonds because it is a picture and I am a man.
The ring clearly has a stylish structure and pattern to it that is stylish yet casual enough to be worn with blue jeans or to higher class settings . I would say your ring has well rounded style.
>>682635223
How many kt, fag? The diamonds i mean.
>>682637160
So is my dick. She is used to small things but that is okay because shes into domination anyway and I love being humiliated.
>>682637785
We haven't had sex yet because she wants to keep her virginity until marriage.
>>682637863
A real man is the one who provides for and respects women no matter. A real man isn't a selfish asshole and puts HER needs FIRST!
>>682635687
The joke is they made a female Zelda now
>>682638033
Looks like Jabba the Hutt's hand
>>682638150
Zelda is not the main character. Zelda is the princess In the game. Link is the main character. I think Zelda has always been a female.
>>682638150
the joke is they said it's a female Zelda but it looks exactly the same, it's actually the same Zelda but since everyone always thinks it's a female they got sick of having to keep telling otherwise
>>682638097
>A real man isn't a selfish asshole and puts HER needs FIRST!
Relationships are mutual and need balance.
>White Knight/Beta confirmed
>Future/Current Cuck
>>682638097
Drip..... drip....... drip......
>>682638494
Happy wife, happy life is a real thing.
Source, i have been married for 3 years now
>>682638097
I can't
>OP are you just an elaborate troll?
>This can't be real.
>>682638097
>A real man is the one who provides for and respects women no matter. A real man isn't a selfish asshole and puts HER needs FIRST!
Nope. If a woman uses the 'real men ....' they are just manipulating you into doing or being something that benefits them.
Don't fall for it OP. Never listen to what women say they want, how they behave is the only accurate indicator.
Put in her vag and say you've found something.
>>682638627
I think both people should be happy to have a healthy relationship actually. That logic is why we see so many cuck threads on here, men who secretly hate their cunt wives but give them everything thry want. Be an adult and treat your spouse like one, not some princess who owns your world.
>>682638627
To a body pillow?
>>682638494 Femanon here.
Misogynist MRA neckbeard confirmed. Go pack to /pol/ you butthurt nazis hahaha. Women are ABOVE men, whether you like it or not. We have the pussy. You only bring the sperm which is nearly worthless and can be easily obtained anywhere. We women rule the world and you filthy virgin rapists do the heavy lifting and dangerous jobs for us so we can take our pay and go shopping. You better start showing some respect for us Women or your life will be a living hell.
>>682638884
It should be but it's not. Welcome to the real world where things are not fair or equal
>>682635397
>>682639042
>OPs GF detected
>>682639042
Sigh.... Tits or GTFO.
>>682638627
is your wife also your adopted child?
Get on one knee, pull out ring, "anon, will you do me the honor of ruining the rest of my fuckin life?"
Wait for the "I do"
Kill self.
Congrats phaggot
>>682639042
>>682639042
Yup, because I'm just some forever alone neck beard with no college education, sounds pretty judgmental coming from someone who cries about gender norms and privilege.
Or maybe I'm speaking from experience and now how to please my girl friend without having to be a cowering beta. Sorry, its about even with us and if it wasn't, I've been there and dated a feminazi before who use to say "if we cut off all dicks war would stop", ya not going back to that. Have fun living in your hate fueld safe space.
>>682639042
Hey Femicunt, come back, you havent proven your point yet.
>>682639959
WTF has happened to 4chan now?
I know people have been preeching 4chan down the pan for years but this is just unacceptable.
The only response needed to the original comment is simple.
FFS
>>682636444
nice trips
>>682639042
> virgin rapists
Musat be pretty bad rapists
also
TITS OR GTFO
>>682640472
He also mentioned that his GF lurks with him on /b
>>682638097
I think this is her and not some baiting troll, not to sage.
>>682639042
>>682635397
You mean he be Link and she be Zelda?
>>682635223
Ask her if she be the second player
take a non blurred picture of the ring fgt - gemologist
>>682635223
>>682637631
This cuck knows what he's talking about. Listen to him or be miserable, OP.
She's gunna sell the ring in a month for a carton of Newports and a year's supply of Magnums
>>682638097
OP here I fell asleep, this faggot wasn't me.
you guys know squirting is piss, right?
clog the toilet and leave the ring on top of your shit
>>682642635
About 50%, a lot of it is built up vaginal juice. I've tasted it, it has that piss aftertaste but not the constancy or color. Obvious, you've never been there before, feels good man.
