ITT: POST YOUR SECRETS...
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
ITT: POST YOUR SECRETS...
>>672435201
I'm infertile
>>672435201
I can lick my own asshole.
>>672435201
i hate you op
>>672435201
I dream about my xbf all the time. It has been a year and a half now. I don't even want him back I just want to make things right, as in, no hard feelings.
>>672435201
i helped cover up 911
>>672435499
sry. =(
>>672435528
>no hard feelings
you dont want to fuck him in the ass again?
>>672435443
Interesting... Is it painful?
>>672435832
No, I don't want him to fuck me in the ass again.
im gay
>>672435201
I'm not coming back from the vacation I'm taking next month.
>>672435528
I still think about my xgf of 5 years. Tried to move on but the thought of her ruined my past relationships. You're not alone
>>672436226
due to suicide?
>>672435841
Naw, it's not really that hard.
I've been having continuous dreams of going full Hotline Miami on this one person who's been nothing but a complete asshole to everyone around them and really hurt a friend of mine.
I got my new engineering job for my experience in 3d printing. I purchased my personal 3D printer because I wanted to make MLP models
>>672436604
at least you are cool enough to have a 3d printer.
>>672436226
hmm, same
I'm wondering if I would get paid for my "paid vacation days" if I leave the job right after the vacation?
>>672436410
tutorial...?
>>672435201
i cheat on my wife with trannys
In the heat of the moment of having sex with my black gf I called her a prize negress and she broke up with me.
>>672435201
i didnt know what reddit was until i started browsing 4chan, i dont even know what the site is about
>>672436361
Nope. Just going to keep traveling until I'm broke or dead. Money just isn't worth giving up my life for anymore.
>>672436876
You should. Last job I got fired from paid my vacation time out after I was terminated.
I want to double team my gf.
>>672437782
I want to help
>>672437741
were you fired before or after the vacation? also good luck, where are you planning on travelling to first?
>>672436604
Where can you get a 3D printer?
I killed a baby when i was 9
>>672437998
Never cashed it in, it was like a massive bonus on my final check.
>>672435201
I derailed this thread with scat fetish posts.
>>672412693
I'm a lesbian and cheating on my boyfriend with my best friend
I am phone
I enjoy giving blowjobs
>>672435201
Im a heroin addict. Not really a secret though
>>672437998
Oh, right, and also.
I'm hiking the PCT. Everyone knows about this. Then whether I finish or not, I'm just going to tramp around the country until I get bored of it. I may hang out at slab city for a while, while I figure out what else to do. I'm not even sure if I'm going to answer my phone once I leave the trail, and just disappear.
>>672436604
What is a 3D printer ? A printer that print three's and D's ?
Had shemale fetiche. Lost it in /b/'s traps.
>>672435201
I fucked my daughter
Also she's 13yo
>>672438329
>lesbian
>boyfriend
Comment?
>>672439053
secrets, no lies
I'm a closet furfag and have multiple furry (actually scalie I guess) crushes
Literally wish this part of me were dead
>>672438329
Tell him. He'd probably be into it.
In a shitty motel at Port Hedland Western Australia and I'm waiting an asian hooker
I invested in a comic book app called Powfolio from the company Red Giant Entertainment. Markiplier, the you tuber is involved and it was supposed to be big. I subtly hinted to friends to invest while I already sold because they pissed me off. They lost big. Now it's about to bounce again.
>>672439105
I'm so far in the closet I'm eating pussy in Narnia.
>>672439254
Highly doubt it.
>>672439239
Uhh you trolled hard kid
>>672438329
tits or gtfo
>>672437182
like everyone does
>>672439385 (You)
>>672436314
Initials? Is it F?
>>672438070
It is a Solidoodle 3. Bought it online
>>672439042
It prints layers of plastic to create a three dimensional object
>>672439452
ok
I fapped to my sister while she was pregnant... a lot.
>>672439367
Unless you're willing to let him fuck both you than your fucked, and also hope you die for cheating on your bf unless he's a faggot
i slut out to guys on kik i love it and hate it at the same time
>>672435528
Been 5 years. Still dream of my ex. She's married and had a kid last year... Drives me nuts.
>>672435528
I woke up last night from a dream about an ex I had throughout college. The damn feelings in the dream were so powerful. The first thing I thought of when I awoke was "please stop doing this to me..." I'm with someone new now, but still hurts like it was yesterday, you know? Not alone indeed.
then i am hitler, i am inmortal
>>672438663
I want one
Ive always wanted to peg a guy. I don't know why. Part of me just wants to fuck him like a the little ass whore he is.
>>672435201
I'm scared shitless and there's nothing I can do about it. I don't know what's real and what's not anymore.
This isn't some "oh I think I might be a horse" complaint. I'm experiencing schizophrenia-tier delusions. When I was in middle school I had moderate acne. I didn't really think it was that bad but my mom felt obligated to get me medicated for it. I was put on a drug called Acutane and my skin cleared up. But I noticed I wasn't thinking clearly, I would get extremely angry or happy or sad and have no control over my emotions.
When I put two and two together I just chucked the medicine into the trash. My mom was pissed as fuck of course. She didn't believe me until we went back to the dermatologist and he said that sometimes Accutane can cause serious neurological problems.
That was almost 15 years ago. For awhile everything went back to normal. But then I started getting these impulses. It's a lot like in a dream when you just know something. Like you KNOW the background to a situation or you KNOW what you're supposed to be doing. It's like that only in real life.
Some of them are simple
>I can't wear my tennis shoes today! My grandma is coming to visit
Even though both of my grandmas are dead. So I'll make it halfway to work before I'll realize I look silly in black shoes and cargo shorts.
>We don't have any eggs because we had friends over last night
When we have eggs and we haven't had friends over recently
And some of them are debilitating.
>Waking up and start to call the police because I think I killed someone
>Waiting in Walmart for hours because I'm supposed to meet with someone who can help me find my car
>Thinking someone close to me is dead
>Crying because I don't know who took my non-existent daughter
Eventually I snap out of it. But I'm so scared. I'm seeing a psychiatrist and he doesn't know how to help me. I'm 26 and I'm going crazy and no one can help me.
I would give anything to be normal again. Right now I'm just scared.
>>672439840
Ahrgggg
>>672439810
>doesn't post username
I fucked a Thai bar slut on holiday in 2014 and she had a baby, 9months later sent me pics on fb. It looks just fucking like me. Soyeah I'm a dad now...
>>672439718
dont forget timestamp
>>672438133
Brutally?
I wanna bang my little cousin so bad, it makes me feel like a monster, but her acting like a little tease doesnt help.
>have no locks in my house other than parents room and front door, not even the bathroom shit sucked man
>nothing to stop anyone from 'just hanging man'
>spend most of my time playing vidyas and watching movies
>little cousin comes over every other week for almost the entire day
>while my mom goes out drinking with the ladies
>left as the free baby sitter
>fucking hate cousin
>she'd always try and flirt with me and escalate everything
>if I would try and ignore her she'd sit in my lap and lie on my chest rubbing me in my gamer chair
>'quit playing your games let's play together anon'
>shed treat everything as a game if I'd ignore her she'd annoy me till I acnowledged her, like turning off my Xbox mid game or grabbing at my crotch when I'm zoning out
>only time she wouldn't be a piece of shit was when I'd give in and play with her
>we'd play husband and wife and she'd feed me food like crackers and pour me tea (water)
>I actually quite liked this part since even though she was 10 I liked the attention
>I'd have to stop playing when she'd try and make me go to bed with her or kiss her
>mfw she told her parents my other cousin tried make her kiss him
>mfw he got the shit Beat out of him by his dad
>mfw she scares me
>>672439053
Pictures. Or it didn't happen
>>672437182
Where do you find them????
>>672440526
is she ugly or something? i dont see the issue
I post nude pics and webms of my wife on /b/ and tell anon that she is my ex. I even encourage anon to spread the pics around. I get off exposing her and knowing anon is jerking to her.
I'm both a urophile and hebephile, but my wife only knows of the former.
>>672438330
this is literally the scariest post i've read on /b/. don't go to /x/. you'll kill people.
>>672439367
Don't be a fucking asshole and break up with your boyfriend.
If the people around you aren't cool accepting you as a lesbian, find new people to be around.
Life fucking sucks sometimes, but kidding yourself and kidding others is a fucking waste of time.
>>672441099
And your daughter only knows about the latter?
>>672441358
lol
I actually like furry porn
this one time at band camp i accidentally a retard flute girl with my trombone
>>672440526
lol she may be playing you, but i got a plan, set up some type of camera in front of your tv like the kinect and hide the little light that says its on, film yourself playing to not make it seem to easy, when she starts "playing with you" let her escelate it to sex, or close to it, after if she wants to snitch tell her you video taped it and will use it as blackmail, then free sex for life, or at least 10 years
i wanna see her sex tape!
>>672435558
Better, trips. Czeched.
>>672442160
10 years to life sounds about right.
>>672441896
>>672440889
Part of me wishes that someone would recognize her and l fully expose her - post the pics to FB, send them to friends and family, the whole nine yards. I can't bring myself to do it myself, but I'd be diamonds if it happened.
I want to harm another person
I don't think I could stop if I began
so I dont hurt people
but I want to
i'm too clingy to be manly
I'm a drug addict. Not very exciting but that's mine. Also I have finally accepted that I'm an alcoholic. My alcoholism is way worse than my drug problem. I could imagine not doing drugs ever again and be alright with it, but it scares me to think that I don't have the power to stop drinking forever.
>>672442531
me too /b/ro
sometimes i think about killing people but i don't think i'd stop once i started
I really want to cheat on my gf
I can only fap when putting myself in a role of submission. I'm bisexual, so it isn't hard.
>>672442531
>
im there with you anon, im there with you
I post my own nudes on here with a fake kik because I love hearing all the comments guys make about me.
I've cheated on my wife with her sister, and with my sons girlfriend.
>>672435201
I actually really like the girl that im just "friends with benefits" with.
>>672440836
She's adorable, but that's not the point. The point is that she can say I tried to grab her ass, and end my life.
i want to rape women, but im a femenist man and want all women to be treated equal, yet at night i fantasies about all the chances i would have had if i went trough with it, and how much pussy i would be getting, especialy when i talk to women and they say they have been raped and did nothing back to them, i then think "that could have been me". i get laid like 1 time every year so...
I'm pretty sure my family, parents at least, think i'm gay or something. I dont really date girls but i hang out with them all the time and go on "dates" and have sex with them quite often but I am shy and just dont tell other people about it.
>>672442531
Same here fag if you look at me you'll probably think "look at this faggot boy" but that's how I want people to look at me inside I know I will fuck anybody up real bad and I won't be able to stop like past times . I am fucking scared of the shit I can do actually I feel no pain no guilt no remorse if you fuck with me
>>672442949
That's awesome! Story about sons girlfriend?
Im 23 and only ever FUcked hookers
>>672443552
Hookers and cocaine
>>672443552
did you passionately make love to any?
>>672435201
Whenever I get up to use the bathroom, I always click on a random historical Wikipedia page so that in case I die, people will think I was actually researching something intellectual instead of fapping on 4chan.
>>672443320
yeah, it's not really a question of "is this worth it?"
It's more of a "now that I have already gone so far, why stop? I cant lose anything, I got nothing."
Same with sex, I'm a virgin, and I cant face the prospect of that level of intimacy with another person. I'm pretty sure id just go full lust-retard and more or less rape that person
scary stuff happens when your barriers brake down....
>>672443810
explain how going to the bathroom ends in your death?
I think Just Dance is a fine game
last night while i was driving on the freeways i went over the speed limit by 5 miles.
>get on my level fags.
>>672443953
thats what i was thinking? im guessing his secret is that he goes on 4chan
>>672443953
Haven't you ever seen Final Destination bro?
>>672439810
I do the same thing. I get wet from the danger of giving nudes but guys just keep them to themselves anyway.
my mom's car tried to finger me in the back of my friend's mom.
>>672444279
>i_ain_clicking_dat_shit_nigga.jpeg
>>672444302
but who was driver?
I cried at the ending of mirai nikki
>>672435201
I'm a tranny
I hate being a tranny now but everyone all ready accepted me and I look pretty decent.
Can't really take it back "Guis I changed my mind"
>>672436876
They are required by law to pay your vacation days owed in most states.
>>672444279
this is what i want to do to humans on a daily basis
>>672443320
K KEEP ME POASTED
I raped my mom when she was passed out cuz the drink. I was like 15 yo.
She discover me and kept the secret even when I did the same with my sister.
She had a nice ass.
i am the will of allah
I would love to strangle the person next to me.
>>672437639
so i wasn't the only one..
>>672444279
lol, why is that exhillerating?
you are setting fire to something that cant oppose it in any way, what difference is there between that and setting ablaze some firewood?
that some weak minded shit right there, also it's cute
so lame
>>672444401
jesus christ dont
My sister and I got unnaturally close for a while. She had a discussion with me about how we had to stop so later that night when she was really drunk and we were in bed together I fingered her.
molested. liked it. get off on loli now. that is all.
>>672443703
All sucked i for 3 i had to jack off while they finger their self
>>672444510
>>672435201
father molested me and my sister our whole childhood. would make us do shit to him and with each other. I hope to see him some day so I can Fucking put a hole in his head.
>>672444725
BECAUSE BONER.EXE
>>672444456
lol move out to another town, thats why being a tranny is only ment to be a secret, shit wears out if you do it all day everyday
>>672444456
lol
fucking
idiot
lol
"I'm a tranny, dont really wanna be it. But everyone i know kinda accepts me as that beta-autist tranny-guy so i cant go back. I guess il just be the beta-autist tranny-guy until I die then"
Kill yourself now so you avoid having to face your choices when your 90...
>>672443552
pretty much this.
Fucked many hookers, everything from meth trash on the street to high class.
I've managed to keep it a full secret but the other day pretty sure someone I went to high school with saw me leaving a brothel last week. Oh well, at least it was one of the high class ones.
>>672444829
so you sucked your father's cock?
>>672444765
so you're a virgin then
>>672440135
Just kill yaself
>>672444868
problem is my family and old friends actually like and treat me better as a girl. so it's like
fuck
>>672439367
high five,pussy is neat!
>>672444776
i don't see the relevance
>>672436460
I don't condone this, but if it happens, use Carl plz
>>672442949
Sons girlfriend story?
Nudes?
>>672444829
pics or it nevr happend
i am moot.
>>672444961
anonymous so I'll admit it. yeah. made me sick his dick, fuck his ass, stuck it in my ass. made me fuck my own sister. fucked up shit man. fucked me up pretty bad in the head.
>>672444991
i fucked them but i had to finish jack ing off cant cum with condoms and non want to suck me off raw
>>672435201
Tried to have sex with the family dog when I was 11..
Luckily it was unsuccessful, basically just prodded once or twice with my dick without even touching anywhere near a correct place..
Felt like shit afterwards.. Apologized to the dog and never did anything like it again..
If I had succeeded I would probably have killed myself eventually..
Fortunately the dog couldn't understand what was happening, but that didn't stop me from apologizing..
>>672444525
lol I like the one when a car gets eaten by one of those machines it hurts more
>>672445153
police believed it without pics. he went to prison for a while.
>>672445257
Was ya sisters cunt tasty
>>672440135
right now, somewhere in the universe, there is a black hole, 1000 times the size of our solar system, that can consume all, and will destroy all that falls within it. There is no escape. There is no way out. It is there and there is nothing you can do about it. It feels no pain, no joy, no mercy. The central black hole of the phoenix cluster holds everything together, and it can easily rip you to shreds.
>>672445440
Not something I remember.
i went to alternative school, i was 16 or so, this girl that was a freshman and like 14, we started a friendship, no one thought nothing of it, not even the teachers, one day we needed to go to do some type of work in a barely light computer room and she sat next to me, the teacher sat in a way were she couldnt see us, i was horny af and fingered her in the classrooom, she told me she liked it and we been fucking ever since, 19 btw
>>672445257
maybe he just saw how feminized you were as a kid and figured: "fuck it, might as well get a blow job out of it".
>>672445257
So are you cool now? Now that you know it's "all in your head", can you live normal?
>>672444525
poor moosie :(
>ITT: POST YOUR SECRETS...
Is /b/ a place for teen faggotry? What's next? Are the gonna be threads on who your crush in class is? You're a failure to everyone you know.
>>672438792
Good luck, friend. Hope everything goes well for you.
>>672445511
Well you've been there once go find out idiot
>>672444776
Got more? Orher than the white mous3 one
>>672445586
I think Victoria is pretty cute tbh
>>672445257
have you ever fucked your sister when he wasn't making you do it?
>>672444247
haha no they don't, but it's cute that you think that
>>672445586
>implying there's any adults here.
I ate ass before Kyle
>>672445649
i eat ass
I sexually identify as an observatory.
I make fake IDs just for fun, make some pretty credible ones sometimes
>>672445495
Is it your but hole you're talking about ?
I just really want to shove Wild Woody in my urethra
I SEXUALLY IDENTIFY AS A VLADMODEL
>>672440135
Shit, I think im experiencing schizophrenia too, but i think its mostly the drugs. I also took acutane.. not sure there is a relation
>>672445928
lel i died
>>672445578
I'd murder him and spend life in prison and not regret it. Also I've had the urges to do the shit. but I'm stronger than it. it's hard knowing you're totally fucked and there's nothing you can do to get rid of it.
>>672445574
lol, soooo much edge bruh
I hate cats and pit bulls. If I could get away with it I would shoot them on site.
>>672442431
lol same anon
Something something illegal blah blah blah
>>672445755
no. it wasn't something we wanted to do. we were forced.
Thread is pure faggotry
>>672439053
seems like thats every neckbeard fantasy around here.
im a sjw.
apparently I have a daughter that I never met shes 3ish now
>>672446132
honestly i would just kill the cunt
a man has a code of honor he must uphold
i highly doubt anyone in prison would give you much shit for it considering
>>672446388
>let her grow up.
>meet up with her in teens.
>she developes GSA.
>fuck her tight anus.
>profit.
>>672446423
he lives nowhere near me now. my daughter died a day after birth, someone told him and he tried to get in contact with me through a mutual friend. told her to tell him I'd murder him if I saw him.
I had a dog who everyone loved. We lived in a "party house" of sorts, with my best friends and had a great time. Everyone loved this dog. He was like a mini border collie mix with cross eyes. Just loved to cuddle and be cute but was also a badass. Extremely smart. Anyway he died at the age of four. Too young. And he suffered big time. It was not a quick and painless death. I told my friends he died instantly and didn't suffer at all.
I'm in love with these girls. Particularly the 2nd from the right, Dara. They are the kpop group 2NE1 and i'm a 48 year old metal head.
>>672435201
i knew 9/11 was an inside job but i didn't tell no one. i could of stopped it
fun story was friendzoned, girl got her self fucked up and came to my door middle of the night. Long story short came in her
I've had suicidal thoughts nearly every day for as long as I can remember. To the point that it's become a joke. My family hates me and if my current path falls through (like they want) I'll probably end up on the end of a rope.
The only thing keeping me alive is my University work, the few Professors who have looked me in the eyes and told me that I'm a good person, and the few friends that I've made.
Every so often I talk to one of the girls I know and she just giggles and tells me I'm weird/crazy - It's the highlight of my day.
>>672442969
If she is your age just go for it fagget
>>672435201
All of my reactions to things, vocally, facial movements, postures, are all copied from watching other people and practicing them in the mirror, which I did as a small kid and still do today at 38. I have no idea what thoughts of my own to say to people, so I sit in coffee shops and bars and stand in lines just listening to the things people say and watching he reactions of those listening. I don't watch movies or tv, because those aren't real, and won't lead to success replicating them. Everything I say to people is something I've overheard that I'm repeating to get that same reaction. Most of the time, if I get it just right, with the perfect inflections, timing, and gestures, I'll get the response I'm looking for. Only my cousin, my closest friend my entire life, knows
I do this, and has always told me it's not normal but if it works, do it & just keep it secret bc people will react badly.
I know what sounds good and what makes
>>672446664
my friend this is about restoring your honor and gaining closure
killing him will allow you to put it all in the past
who cares how far away he is make the effort
show that piece of shit that you are a man
I fucked a jew, it was horrible.
>>672440135
friend idk if you are still here but you need to see a PSYCHOLOGIST
>>672435528
nah, you want him back
i find her sexually attractive.
I pee in the sink and bathtub
>>672446688
that's rather young what was the cause?
>>672435201
my dad said if i tell anyone ill get in trouble
>>672447106
>>672445070
and where do you find people who would fuck her?
>>672446982
What makes it sound natural. But every 10-12 months I burn through a set of friends and put in for a transfer to a new town so
I can start completely over fresh.
>>672445320
Was house sitting once. Put peanut butter on cunt, dog loved lapping it up. I came hard.
Felt horrible afterwards. But it's not like I jerked him off or tried to get him to fuck me.
>>672446982
Holy fuck this is awesome!!
I've heard people say that before
>>672446982
Holy shit
>>672446931
lol why would she be her age and making him "babysit her?", shes probably like 5 years younger,
>>672447106
You're not alone in that anon.
>>672440245
How did you manage to get a guy pregnant?
Also , any plans to Keep contact or are you just cool with your kid living in poverty?
>>672447332
I'm a gril too. We all are.
I buy packs of taffy and throw away all of the non banana taffy, and when my family is asleep or gone I cook bacon and eat it with my banana taffy. No one knows about this.
Well, I can suck my own dick, but I tend to think is kinda gay so I don't do it a lot
>>672440135
If this is real you need to be put on heavy antipsychotics and Xanax and probably a lot of other meds. I feel really bad for you man, I'm so sorry.
>>672447267
whats wrong with this? kind of like you have a mask on to hide yourself, i did this all the time in middle school when i didnt know who i was
>>672447631
is taffy a retarded way of saying toffee?
>>672447602
> Dur dur dur.
>>672435201
My friend's uncle filmed us showering and fucking a few times.
Friend was 12. I was 10-11.
The pics and videos are probably still somewhere on the dark web.
I'd be willing to bet at least one of you sick fucks reading this fapped to that shit.
>>672435201
I'm part of an audience watching my brother slowly decend into suicide. We all keep positive, or artificially show it around him; maybe they truly believe it to be so, holding hopes for the future. But I know what will come, and it likely be the death of me along with him.
>>672446982
Not sure but might be actual autism.
>>672447202
>>672447503
How do you guys live with it?
>>672445586
she knows who she is :3
>>672435201
I'm just one bad day way from suicide.
I also am in the beginning stages of ED, AND I have what is either eczema on my dick or a yeast infection.
>>672442531
You're such a little fucking edge lord. You're really just a little autistic cuck like 70% of the people posting on this thread right now. It's extremley common for for people to think about murder and hurting people, it's only abnormal when people actually act on it.
used to get ass fucked from the ages of 10 to 15. then i got a girlfriend and moved on.
>get off on shota though. im a male.
>>672447803
Nein.
Toffee and taffy are two very different things.
Both are excellent, but very, very different.
My FWB has a girlfriend and I'm still fucking him. He told me about her and I kept pushing him to cheat on her because I was jealous he was dating her. We're all going to move in together in a few weeks and we're going to pretend we don't know each other. He wants a threesome and so do I, so we're going to bait her into a threesome with him and I.
>>672447867
wow fuck you if im the brother, i only have one thing to say, FUCK YOU I WILL NEVER KILL MYSELF, YOU PISS SHIT ASSHOLE I WILL BE A DICTATOR AND MAKE YOU WISH I HAD DIED, that is all
I'm separated from my wife. She has no idea that I've already met and slept with 2 other women.
Ive sucked a couple dicks.
Also tried to take a dick up the but
I was going through a Phase that im totally out of now,
Still makes me shudder when i think about it.
None of my new friends know.
>>672447119
me 2
>>672444739
Alright /b/, so, my brother is about eight years younger than me and he graduated from elementary school in June. I ended up going along, partly because my brother's an okay guy and partly because my parents dragged me. So I got there, and the first thing I saw was that there were all these lolis. And the thing about elementary school grad lolis is that they like to think they're grown up. So, of course, they were all dressed really slutty. That was probably the third reason I stayed. Awesome smooth backs and delicious flat chests.
So the entire night was like slutty lolis on parade. But then, near the end of the ceremony, this one loli, who was trying not to look slutty and so was wearing a dress that went down to her feet (but strapless, so she still failed at the not slutty look) goes up. She walked across the stage and got her diploma, and then she headed for the stairs down. Then, right as she got there, she stepped on the bottom of her skirt. I could tell right away it was going to go. She slipped forward and tried to grab it, but by then it was over her delicious flat chest and about to go the whole way. To top it off, she was stumbling toward the stairs. She was about to fall and my mom got scared, she said "You're movin' with your auntie and uncle in bel Air." I whistled for a cab, and when it came near, The license plate said "fresh" and it had dice in the mirror. If anything I could say that this cab was rare, But I thought "Nah forget it, Yo home to Bel Air." I pulled up to the house about seven or eight, and I yelled to the cabby "Yo holmes, smell ya later." Looked at my kingdom, I was finally there, To sit on my throne as the Prince of Bel Air.
>>672447821
did you fuck the uncle or friend? both? highly doubt I have any of it, sadly; but I might..
>>672448149
you'll an hero within a year
>>672438329
Are you my gf?
>>672448210
You'll regret leaving your bromos
Part of my Job is answering phones,
When no one is around i just pick it up and hang up.
Ill do that for about 2-4 hours during an 8 hour shift.
>>672447911
>How do you guys live with it?
it doesnt bother me. everyone i know [friends and family] knows that i dont make a distinction between a beautiful teen and a beautiful 40 year old woman. If the girl is hot, she is hot. period. try fapping to an ugly teen and you'll see what i mean.
>protip: you're not looking at her age, you're looking at her looks.
>pic related.
>>672448145
lol im going to be laughing when she finds out hes cheating with you and both of you wont have that 3 some,
I have a ritual called "terminator". I crouch in the shower in the "naked terminator" pose. With eyes closed I crouch for a minute and visualize either Arnie or the guy from the 2nd movie. I then start to hum the T2 theme. Slowly I rise to a standing position and open my eyes. It helps me get through my day. The only problem is if the shower curtain sticks to my terminator leg. It sorta ruins the fantasy.
>>672448343
whats my initial fucker?
>>672446993
I'm better than him. I almost feel bad for him. apparently he had the same thing happen to him, which caused him to have the urges to do it to us (supposedly)
but then again I don't because I'm not doing the shit he did. but I'm better than him. unless he comes around my child. then he's Fucking dead, kiddo
>>672448210
Same. Tried it, to see how it felt.
Felt fuckin good, of course (or people wouldn't do it).
Haven't done it since.
No idea why tho.
Not turned on by guys whatsoever, so that doesn't really help I suppose.
I dated this really innocent christian girl and got her to start drinking and smoking weed. Basically I'm a huge manipulator and piece of shit because beta af when she totally didn't deserve it she ended up getting pregnant, and I convinced her to have an abortion which she paid for. She broke up w me after we spiraled a little more and basically I ruined her life
Tfw I find out I have a soul and completely regret fucking her life up
>>672448476
nice pasta. faggot.
I think I may have had evidence that my uncle was a child molester before anyone else knew, but I didn't know what to make of it at the time so I didn't tell anyone. That was almost 20 years ago and he's probably been operating unimpeded since.
Given handies to dogs of both genders. I would fuck a horse if given the opportunity. I started with hard beast and downgraded to being a furry due to legal concerns.
I'm bi, probably leaning gay, and only a small segment of people I trust know it for sure, but I think everyone else either has a good guess or has figured it out.
I take most of my shits in the shower. I started when I was little and just didn't stop. I don't get it but I've never made an effort to stop doing it.
>>672448476
lol im going to try this
>>672448476
Topkek
I'm going to vote Hillary unironically.
>>672448476
Top fucking kek
>>672447007
MY NIGHTMARE
>>672448476
autism
>>672448154
Lol she's probably already met and slept with 10 guys
walked my wife around like a dog, leash, nakes, and on all 4's. first couple days ago. she gets so wet i make her lick her puddles. bitches love to get treated like bitches. Who knew? Ps. our relationship has never been better.
>>672448149
I highly doubt you are. I sounded apathetic above, which may be a coat of mine in a way to ease digestion. Anyway, if you are; Take care of your self, please.
Me and my friend sometimes go "munging".
What is munging you might ask? Gather round /b/, for I shall tell you:
Munging is the one thing worse than genocide. One must first have no shame. Then he/she must use a newspaper (or the internet I guess) to find the obituary of a recently deceased man or woman. Then you get a buddy who also has no shame to aid you in this disgraceful act. You and your buddy then go to the cemetary where you dig up your victim. Then you flip a coin (or rock, paper, scissors or whatever). The loser (or winner depending on how sick you are), applies his/her lips to the genitals or anus of the corpse while the other partner proceeds to climb the nearest tombstone and elbow drop the corpse's stomach and thus forcing out a blend of rich bodily fluids and embalming materials into and around the other's mouth/face. This volatile blend is called mung, hence "munging".
There you have it /b/, my confession. Enjoy
I fingered my stepsister
>>672440135
these legit do sound like scizophrenia-psychotic tier delusions, dunno could be start of schizophrenia. but sounds more like straight up psychosis, i'd get help man, not therapy or whatever. but MEDS, these things typically have organic (i.e. biological) etiologies so, to some extent. can be treated. psychiatrists often do suck and so do the meds (i've heard) but its better than going off the deep end completely and permanently. go see a proper psychiatrist man, all of these delusions are legitimately symptomatic of serious and organic mental illness, dunno about the accutane but this can happen to anybody, get help ASAP
Secretly have a cuck fetish. Always think of exes fucking my bestfriends. Wish I had a gf whod fuck my bestfriends on my bed in my house.
>>672442370
Your new is showing
im voting for trump, and im Mexican
>>672448561
I used to do it drunk all the time.
I actually have no Problem at all with gay or bi poeple i just feel so fucking ashamed that i did it.
>Be me.
>Be 20-ish and beta with occasional moments of alpha.
So I volunteer to work graveyards at Wal-Mart for a couple weeks to get extra hours and make extra money. The night manager has an assistant named April.
Bitch is cuntarific like you wouldn't believe, chews me out for the dumbest shit. Makes up some lies to the store manager and I'm suspended. Two days later I'm pissed as hell so I wait until the night shift starts and I pop April's hood (shitty Toyota Camry, all I needed was a screw driver) and I take a shit in her air filter.
3 days later I get a phone call to come down to the store. I figure I'm busted. Get into the meeting and it's my actual manager and the regional manager. They tell me they've reviewed the tapes, and would I like to tell them anything. I'm shitting my pants so I just say "no". They say ok, we'd like to offer your job back and to make up for what happened they'll give me a week's pay. Turns out my actual manager was pissed I was fired and looked at the tapes to prove April was lying.
This isn't the worst of it though. The day I get back one of my friends from the back say that Brad got arrested for vandalism. He took a dump in April's air filter and got caught on tape. Little did I know we owned the same sweater. Threw it out when I got home. He had to pay for an air filter and do 300 hours community service.
>>672449063
Tl;dr
>>672448636
Addendum: I own around $1000 in Bad Dragon products. I'm very proud of my hoard.
>>672449050
So your secret is that youre an idiot?
>>672437182
Bump been there want to go back.. I live in a lie.
>>672449050
implying you arent white beaner with money
>>672448589
Also I'm completely in love with her even tho I'm currently with somebody else and consistently dream about her and wish I could make my way back into her life though it's probably best to just stay out of her way so she can move on
>be me
>7 years old
>Father always told me he had to inspect my growth
>Used to pull on my little kid penis
>Sexual acts
>Mentally scarred
>Cuts self
Thats me, /b/. Your turn
>>672449063
>>672449063
>>672449063
>>672448541
stop kidding yourself mate you don't have the balls if you haven't done it already brothers are supposed to protect their sisters
i know you're fucked in the head but you at least understand what he did to you
but i guarantee she's more fucked up than you
I had a three some and failed cause my dick couldn't get up . FUUUCCCKKKK
I'm 17 never kissed anyone and also a virgin I'm not even bad looking. I'm like a 6/10 maybe a 7/10
>>672449241
3edgy5me
>>672446982
>pro tip
do the opposite faggot; most conversation or jokes among 'normal' people are just repeated lines or re-hashing of scenes from popular movies/tv shows/sports plays. if you want to be popular with people you need to be able to make connections about that shit. ignoring pop culture will only alienate you further.
I was raped repeatedly by my older and younger brother. when I was around 12-17.
>>672449030
In addition to this i have a huge trap fetish. would love to get cucked by a trap. Watching that boypussy get ravaged is satisfying. Maybe suck them while theyre getting fucked.
this happened probably around the time i was 12... my sister and her boyfriend came home while i was watching TV and they went into the kitchen to get some drinks. while in the kitchen they were doing their whole lovey dovey thing and kissing and playing grab-ass and what not, and it was unappealing to me, so i went up to my room. a few minutes later, i heard them enter into my sister's room and then some rustling occurred. i thought nothing of it, they were probably just making out again on her bed. then i heard her scream and i got worried so i ran over to her room, and opened the door, got on the floor, everybody walk the dinosaur! open to door, get on the floor, everybody walk the dinosaur! BOOM BOOM ACKLAKKALAKKA BOOM BOOM BOOM ACKLAKKALAKKA BOOM!
>>672439367
What makes you think that? This scenario is literally every straight males fantasy.
Present you and your gf to him as a present, let him have his threesome and then break up.
>>672435201
I had sex with my sister when I was 12.
She ran away from home and I never saw her again.
I really just want to die, but I'm too pussy to do it.
>>672449063
Good job anon. Nothing like an application of precision justice.
how do you get your wife to put on a leash in the first place?
>>672448636
if i were to shit in the shower how the fuck do i get it to go down the drain
>>672449282
hah. I was a kid. literally single digit age and my father was making us believe it was ok. at that age you trust your parents, unconditionally.
>>672449428
And your younger brother?
Like at the same time?
How old where all the poeple involved?
I want to fuck my supervisor. He's been sending mixed signals and then all but ignored me today.
>>672449369
you are better off being a virgin than fucking anything above 12 at this point in our culture.
>trust me.
>pic related.
>>672448252
Both, mostly just my friend.
His uncle was pretty hands-y and mouthy, but I doubt he was stupid enough to ever film himself.
He had it much worse than me, being family and all. I don't really know the extent of it, to be honest. I haven't talked to him in years.
>>672449495
Whoa.
Story time?
>>672435201
In order to sleep I have to put the pillow partially overhanging my head, swirl the blanket around it to make it look like, in the low light if the bedroom, like I'm looking out the opening of a large cave out across the sheets and blankets which look like the rolling plains, and huge hunts and things are going on out across the landscape and down in the valley while we warm ourselves by the giant fire, out of the cool early summer drizzle, telling stories, making our hair look fabulous, and trying to imagine what the future of the human race will look like in another hundred years. Will spears still be the same? Oog says ten thousand years, and we all look at him like, Oh Oog, there you go again. That's not even a real number.
>>672449370
Life rolls you shit hands. Kind of expected that kind of response. This is /b/ after all. Kinda why i didnt go into detail.
>>672449553
stomp stomp stomp stomp stomp stomp stomp stomp stomp
I helped my ex suck and fuck a friends dog four times
>>672449651
Damn is that an STD
>>672449795
i was molested by my brother and dont cut myself
I died in Vietnam..
THREE TIMES
>>672448952
Unfortunately, she still thinks we're going to work things out so she has't sept with anyone else.
>>672447911
4chan and TTL (check Mless)
>>672435201
Never understood the beef between 4chan and Reddit.
>>672449907
Damn how did you survive WWII?
I have a tiny dick
>>672449917
and you believe her? lol
I honestly think I'm God and look down on almost everyone even though I've done nothing noteworthy in my life.
I ended up bringing a drunk Girl to my friends house
I was wasted too and we started Messing around
I dont know what i did but i guess one of my nails must have nicked her while i had my fingure in her ass
She started literally bleeding from her asshole (a lot of blood)
she didnt feel it because she was drunk and shit
I ended up not telling her and just making an excuse to bail
She must have woke up covered in arse blood with no idea what happened
Honenstly happened
>>672449616
First I was 12 yo and my younger brother 11 yo and the older brother 16 yo.
Often at the same time
>>672449739
This should be a tv show.
A couple hours ago I ass fucked my wife with no lube. Normally we use Astroglide, which (obvious) slicks her up, but also keeps shit from sticking to my cock. She's a pretty clean girl, so it's never really all that messy, but right now there's little bits of dried shit smeared on my cock, especially right behind the head.
Tomorrow I'm going to see my side girl, and I'm not going to take a shower between now and then, so she can suck my dick and taste my wife's shit pipe. She's really inexperienced, and probably won't know what the weird smell/taste is.
>>672447911
vIadmodels
>>672448145
tits or gtfo
>>672449895
HPV. condoms dont protect you. Hence, the groin and bottom of the shaft.
>stay virgin.
>or buy a child bride.
>nothing above 12 is safe now.
>id trade places with you in a second.
>>672450118
Dude.
Did you ever talk to them about what happned?
>>672449932
wuts TTL I normally just bing search vladmodle.sru
>>672440135
schitzo often comes on later in life; usually around early 20's.
>>672448982
That's called sprunting.
>>672449495
How old was your sister?
>27
Badum tisssh
I spread my friends nudes and her info just because it was hot knowing that other people called her a slut.
>>672449564
yea that doesn't change my point at all
considering how you grow up and realise and it scars you for life
haunts you every day etc
every time she sees you she'll be reminded etc etc
you literally have no ground to stand on with this irrational stance against killing him
>>672450134
>She's really inexperienced, and probably won't know what the weird smell/taste is
Theres being a sexual newfag and then not knowing that a dick shouldnt smell like 2 day old shit.
I am a man who enjoys getting thing stuffed up my ass. I have a wife but she does not like to do that stuff anymore. So now I kinda want to ne gay and fuck trannys, instead I pretend for my wife. We have kids and shit. Some day I will switch to trannys, guys and women. All at the same time in a relationship.
>>672450118
If thats real I would kill them
Just full on shotgun to the face.
>>672450189
Yeah but I rather not be a pedo, I rather just fuck someone around my age and take my chances
>>672450404
I'm not going out of my way to kill him and go to prison, leaving my daughter to grow up without a father.
>>672442757
same bro
>>672450235
No I don't even know where they are
