Feels thread, thinking about making tonight my last night so gonna need some feels
>>710657950
DON'T DO IT.
Sooner or later you'll find happiness
>>710658382
We will find the treasure soon! It could be JUST round the corner. Soon. We I'll have it soon. It will be all ours.. soon.
Nah OP life will remain shit, have a good night and tell me what it's like being dead tomorrow morning.
>>710657950
It's never the better answer but if you think your story come to an end it's your choice.
>>710657950
my story may be hard on you OP, but i dont ever want to have anyone go through what i went through again.
well ill tell my story, i was a crab fisher from the age of 27-34 so ill tell the story of my best friend max. ill follow suit with adonis and will be calling myself Glaucus the fishermans sea god during my story. cont.
>>710659172
>be me 5
>moved around 700 miles to a rural northern town
>kindergarten
>get sat next to a kid named Max
>instantly clicked as friends
>liked the same cartoons, played the same classic vidya
>feelsgoodman
>we got older and were always close friends
>we grew up together and went to different colleges
> straight out of college i went back to my home town
>Max dropped out after his mother was diagnosed with Sarcoma
>Stayed with her for 2 years until she passed away.
>the day after she lost her battle
>we sat on the couch watching football and getting drunk
>the man i saw sitting next to me was much different from the one i grew up with
>he was utterly defeated
>he couldn't cry
>he was in shock of what happened to his mother
> he sat there staring at the TV
>just drinking
>he asked me something which i wont forget
> "Glaucus what do i do now im broke, shes gone and i don't have a degree."
> i responded in the one way i could "I dont know"
>we sat there silently for a few hours.
>we clung to each play, the only thing keeping us sane.
>in the morning, he said he said " I need to get away from here"
>the house was on the market for a little over a month
>max had moved to a port town hundreds of miles away
>one day i get a call from him
>asks me to come down to where he is
>so knowing what hes been through, i took leave from my office and flew to max the next day.
>at this point i was an attorney had taken on a couple of cases.
>when i arrived i was met with a man who was different
>he had been going to the gym, but lived in a disheveled house
>he told me he had been contracted as a crab fisher, and was asked to supply crabs.
>max invited me and the company got a few other people.
>long story short i knew i had to be there for my friend so i did what i thought was right
>i quit my job as an attorney and joined Max in his fishing.
>>710659251
>after joining him life was pretty simple
>for around 7 years
>i got up
>Went to the pier
>fished
>Went home and got piss drunk
>throughout this time Max always seemed distant
>since we lived in the same house i discovered his "secret"
>he was taking one prescription antidepressant and four illegally obtained ones
>he never did get better but i always stayed with him
>one particular day there was a hurricane a few hundred miles over
>We thought it was just a tropical storm
>something we had dealt with before
>no cause for alarm or drama
>so Max, the crew, and I. went to the pier and headed towards open waters.
>We casted our nets and waited
>we sat there in the turbulent waters for a few hours
>this was until the storm hit
>the waves became immensely larger
>and the sky rained ferociously
>we drew our nets in and put the crabs away as we got ready to head back to port
>a particularly big wave knocked us sideways and almost capsized us. we were all almost okay.
>Except for one the companies fisherman, a man named Eddy.
>Eddy was the most reliable person on our crew
>he was there whenever you needed him, he was a jack of all trades in a sense, nicest and perhaps most caring man i met.
>eddy had been rocked to the side of the boat and hit his head, he was knocked out
>once we got our bearings back, we rushed eddy to the ships interior, and began trying to head for port
>not long after a second wave hit.
>This wave capsized us
>Our ship sunk before me
>i rushed under the ship to grab Eddy
>the ship was to far gone to grab him
>Eddy drowned when he was knocked out.
>however i never saw max
>he had simply vanished
>max was gone
>my thoughts all raced to him dying
>when i reached shore, everyone aside from eddy was there
>we got treated for minor injuries and went to Eddies funeral.
>this broke the camels back
>My friend max snapped
>He became a depressed and true alcoholic
>he blamed himself for eddy's death
>he had gone over the deep end
>>710659383
>Max went of the grid, and i went back to being an attorney
>he showed up where i worked piss drunk one day
>he told and yelled at me "Eddy is gone because of me, i could have saved him, why didn't i?
>i stayed with him for the next few months, one day Max decided he had enough.
>On june 9th Max committed Suicide
>he left two notes one for me, and one for everyone else
>the note to everyone read
"Im guilty, i wasnt even able to save one of my closest friends. So why i should i be allowed to live knowing he didn’t. I hate this world."
>The note he left me was as follows
"Thank you Glaucus, you were my first and last friend. i am sorry i had to leave so soon, but my memories with you were the only happy ones i have. Glaucus until we meet again -Max"
I know i could have saved Max but i wasn't able to, im sorry my friend.
Op this is what id like to say, i couldn't save Max but maybe i can save you, don't you dare leave us. Because i don't want to live in a world without you
>>710659493
Da fuq kind of name is Glaucus? Also, Max sounds/sounded like a faggot
>>710658725
OP here, I met someone once who told me death is like approaching a black hole. Slowly as you decent into the event horizon you see all that has happened in life all around you as you slowly become surrounded by the quiet darkness. The way he said it was way better but you get the point, I'm looking forward to the event horizon.
>>710659600
Glaucus is a greek fisherman god. if you think that's what Max was like than thats your interpretation, im not going to get into an argument about my dead friend.
>>710659782
Nah I'm just busting your balls man, sorry about your friendo
>>710657950
>>710659493
Op this is what id like to say, i couldn't save Max but maybe i can save you, don't you dare leave us. Because i don't want to live in a world without you
>>710659493
Op here, thanks for sharing your story. I'll take it in consideration.
>>710660773
i hope you choose to say, your end horizon is horrible to those around you. myself included, because The very thing you want the most, might actually end up being the thing you'd least want. If you're not mindful, you might find out too late. -Glaucus
bump
had my first time with the girl i liked for years...we talked a lot that week , but she is always busy with work or studys , she is single for 9 months (exept one night stand and shits)
FFW today , 2 months later, she have a new boyfriend...
MFW i notice i was a "2 night stand"..now i feel fucking empty
>>710663471
Dude don't worry man, you had sex right? Means your not some beta faggot. Girls are girls, you'll find someone thats a match for you
>>710657950
i know how you feel anon, wanting to kill yourself, no one cares about you, you are all alone and shit.
i know how you feel anon
but its not worth it i promis.
You are worth more then you think anon i promis. you can allways turn your life around its NEVER to late you know.
please tell me/us why you are willing to end it all something that we can help with.
>>710665305
OP here. Don't get me wrong, I'm loved. I got a great family that cares deeply about me, thats reason I've kept on going, because I didn't want to case them pain. If I was without them I would of done it years ago. On my mothers side is a history of depression seeing as she grew up with an alcoholic father and agressive mother. Most of her family killed them selfs. she is the only living relative and my father had a severe trumatic youth. They both swear to do things diffrently and they did I give them credit for that! But depression can be inherited genetically and I got the worst from both sides. Existential nihilism has gotten a hold of me and I just can no longer embrace the absurd
>>710659695
I don't think that's an accurate description of entering a black hole, where tidal forces would stretch you very painfully for a very long time as time itself dilates, while your organs shut down and you eventually disintegrate.
Death is not a romantic concept. It means you will forego the chance to witness the great things that happen around you, even if you don't participate.
There are two reasons to off yourself: to save someone else, or because you suffer from some incurable ailment that will cause you greater and greater suffering until you die from it.
If you're considering this because of some stupid teenage angst and self-pity, then I don't care.
Does that help?
>>710666485
Get some help, there is allways people to help you out you know.
get a pet or something to keep you happy.
you need something to do
try and find it anon
suicide is never the awnser, its only a permenant sultion to a temporary situation
Think robin williams said it first but its true.
>>710657950
Helpless to him, captured motion within
The man made of clay, he moves farther with wind
Dependent on thee, he still cannot see
That half of his sculpture is live flesh indeed
He cries and he wallows when calm is the breeze
He wishes for nothing but free will to see
all sides of the world with his own eyes,
to be
Independent of powers that he cannot see
Why must i suffer, my conscience can't be
part of another dull day just for me
He tires of hoping and wishing alone
he makes his attempt at movement on his own
Lo and Behold
His feet did not hold
He runs without stopping
free will is his own
Until he had reached the top of stone hill
His limits were endless, he was happy and thrilled
Excited with glee yet still just naive
His careless decree caused a horror to see
He tripped on a stone
all of him had just flown
The blood he'd bestowed was really his own
Power to be free, he could not believe
had caused his demise, his existence to flee
The man on the hill, created his will
He gave himself nothing, but time to be ill
However eternal, his hourglass had spill
The man on the hill is forever just still
-Art Alv Ant
hold me, /b/
>>710669433
what if i say, around 10 years? is it good to remember?
>>710669433
About a year ago. I was hugged by a girl I fell for. She didn't feel the same way.
>>710664349
i had sex...yes, but i feel like a bag of shit, i liked her , i dont wanted just sex....never had a gf , always is like "friends with benefits" witouth sex till now...
i feel so useless in everything right now, i just want to kill myself
and in the next month , probably i will be homeless , because of the ex-boyfriend of my mother...
>>710671379
forgot the image
Easiest way to end it? I don't give a shit about pain.
sup i have severe depression and used to think about suicide multiple times a day. It doesn't cross my mind as often since I got a pet cat.
Also I discovered that just making yourself smile for a little bit makes you feel kinda happier. Just the motions of a smile is sometimes enough to get your mind on the right track for a bit. Hope this works for you guys.
pic related, me and Guthix
Don't do that anon, you will find happiness.
Help others, that may will help you.
Sorry for bad english
>>710672215
>the fact that scientists aren't working on genetically engineering pet catgirls
>>710663471
Even if it was a long time that you liked her, that's the past, reality is she's a slut, and with that reality in mind you can forget about her and move on, since she's moved on from you. Don't you fucking dare spare her another one of your thoughts that could be better guided elsewhere.
Chin up dude.
>>710672194
>i still want u in my life, and to talk to you everyday
Cut contact.
I'm not even kidding. You don't want to be hung around as a "plan b", pining for a cunt who doesn't appreciate you.
You'll find someone worth your time eventually, anon.
>>710672194
Damn anon...
>>710672194
Had the same deal. Staying in contact will make you miserable. Use that time you would have spent interacting with her in a way that'll make you happy..
You want to dissappear and escape your life right? You don't necesarily have to kill yourself to do that. Just leave, get away. Get in your car and drive or if you have the money buy a plane ticet and fly as far away as you can or if you neither catch a bus or just start walking. Find new people, discover new places, start over, try again.
Death isn't necessarily the best way to escape.
>>710672624
I just told her goodnight. I never planned on talking to her again. I already know everything you said. She was talking about suicide earlier and she had bipolar so I was planning on ending it anyway because she was eating away at me. I'm already depressed and drown all feeling with liquor. She was only bringing me down but ending it is to much. She's the only one there for me and now that she's gone I have no one. I think I'm gonna end it.
>>710666485
Depression is inherited genetically - you're not inheriting 'fucked up personality', but unstable levels of neurotransmitters in brain.
Go to psychiatrists and start taking anti-depressants.
It will balance your brain, you will be 'normie'.
It won't make you dumber, it will make you normal, it can even improve your concentration and intelligence.
>>710672939
My escape plan is either the military or becoming a travelling hobo in search of odd jobs
>>710673125
OP here, I've conciderd that but dont anti-depressants.strip you of any if not all emotions and just make you a hollow shell?
>>710673125
not this guy, but I had depression for a really long time without realizing it wasn't normal to want to kill yourself on the daily
I was scared antidepressants would change who I am, make me into somebody I wasn't.
That's not how it works, started taking them about a year ago and it really does just balance your hormones or w/e. At least on the pills I'm on.
Good luck to y'all.
>>710673749
I think that's some weird old wives tale or false phenomena portrayed by media. Try it out after researching it a bit, and come to your doctor with questions like side effects that may occur on the first month or so of taking them, which could happen as your body is adjusting to them.
If you want to die so badly, go out in style. In a blaze of glorious flames, fireworks flying in the air and all your possessions burning down before you end your life with a bullet. And in the flames your favorite song is blasting loud enough for your neighbors to hear. Don't die a mediocre death, die in style if you must die.
>>710660773
I know how cliche it is. But I've seen some shit, had some bad shit happen to me. I don't know how to be happy anymore. But I still don't know if I would rather be a kid again, back when it was easy and there were no issues, back when the biggest worry was that I got a C on my math test. I almost feel like I deserve all the shit that happens to me. I drink, I cut, I'm an edgy faggot but nobody knows. I don't know what I want anymore. I don't even know if I want to die or not. I just....don't ya know? Don't anything.
>>710674183
I hope you get better man. I don't know your story but I bet you're a good person deep down at least. You've got my best wishes.
someone got the greentext about the coping mechanism?
>>710673749
Not at all. Result is exactly opposite. Tke key is finding good doctor that will give you good drug.
I was taking antidepressants for one year, now I'm not tasking them, but they saved my life back then.
>>710673857
Also, this.
>>710657950
If you do feel the need and decide to tonight, will you do an experiment for me first?
I want to know if it is possible for someone to blood choke themselves (compress carotid arteries until they pass out) using only their bare hands.
>>710674614
>tasking
*taking
OP
Someone always cares
dont do it.
she saved me.
>pic related
I can't remember the last time I truly loved someone I've had a recent relationship but I didn't talk to her for weeks did I even love her? or was it just me being desperate.. I don't know but I'm going to sleep night /b/
>>710674783
I really wanted to end my life that day, decided to message her and make up things or try to for the last time.
>>710674900
and im here today cause of her,
i can honestly say
im doing better
>>710672194
Tell her straight it's all or nothing. No picking and choosing. No benefits without accepting the pitfalls.
This is probably a bad place to ask, but any ideas what to get my girlfriend for Christmas?
She loves to read, so books are probably a safe bet.
I just miss her
how do i deal with losing my one friend?
i have songs that make me cry because i used to listen to them while drinking with him
i still get drunk to feel better sometimes
>>710675250
>This is probably a bad place to ask, but any ideas what to get my girlfriend for Christmas?
I ask me the same question everyday.
The thing is she left me 6 months ago: I won't buy her anything.
>>710675339
you go to war
>>710675476
the positive side of war is purpose
or something like that
Gonna dump my favorite, most recent little story.
Made me feel a little better about the generation of kids growing up.
>>710676297
>>710676356
>>710676396
>>710676428
Op here, I could post my story on here to if any intrest?
>>710676540
Go for it, I love reading greentexts, though I kinda like it better when they have a happy ending.
>>710672541
i cant stop thinking of her, we were watching netflix in my bed when it happened, and now everytime i do something in my room or netflix or whatever i think in her, watching her last connection and thinking she is fucking other guy...i feel bad , but cant stop
>>710672194
Isn't that the same chick from the "my girlfriend is suicidal help" thread from earlier?
ALSO FUCK THAT BITCH SHE'S NOT WORTH IT, SHE WANTS YOU TO BE HER BACKUP PLAN AND YOU'RE BETTER THAN THAT ANON.
>>710657950
If you were really planning on doing it, you wouldn't have posted here first.
>>710676809
I'm afraid mine aint got none :/
First I wanna note that all I ever wanted was a boring regular life and the next story probably is beter suited for a incest story board but still here I go. The first time sharing my story on 4chan.
>be me be 11 y/o
> my older brother (13y/o) and a couple of my classmates in the back yard of one of my classmates
> In the bushes we check out each others well junk, I had no idea what the hell was going on seeing as I was a really naïeve child
> In the bathroom of my friends house two of my classmates also 11 y/o start blowing each other as my brother and I watch, me not knowing what was going on
> we go home
> in the evening my brother calls me upstairs after bedtime saying anon I wanna try something
> I go upstairs to my brother who tells me to undress
> I refuse, he says "Don't worry, it's normal I just wanna look at something"
Back in this time I really looked up to my big brother, he wasn't someone to mess around with so I obeyed.
> Get undressed as he pulls away the coves also undressed and has boner
> he tells met to turn around and I obey asking him what he wants to do
> he pulls me down first slowly to position and then once in place with full force
> I squirm desperately trying to get the just inserted dick out of my body as the horrible pain I felt inside of my 11 y/o butt makes me shake uncontrollably
> He is much stronger then I am and holds me firmly in place as he is slowly whispering in my ear, "Dont scream, dont scream be a doll! be a doll!"
> I can't get away and the pain is incredible as he fully slid in. I try to move but can't, I force back but can't. I can do nothing as he quickly turns slides out turns me around on the bed and forces my head in the pillow
> I scream but the pillow muffles the sounds as he slides rights back in and starts pounding my ass.
cont?
I used to be depressed but i started running long distance and lifting and i became more productive actually accomplishing shit. You guys feel like crap because u dont do anything. Do yourselves a favor and improve yourself. And don't let miscellaneous shit pile up; finish responsibilities immediately so u have more time to better yourself. Be better than the hot girl from high school than friend zoned u for a chad. Be better by getting rid of ur vices. Mine was sitting at home all day playing pokemon roms like how the fuck is that supposed to help me?
>>710678883
go ahead, we're here.
>>710679305
I play 2 sports and lift whenever I'm not doing the sports the only girl who's ever shown any interest in me said my body was the best she's ever seen then all of a sudden she lost all feelings for me and I'm about to cut her off and move on I started lifting almost 2 years ago cause I thought it would make me more attractive and now I'm just alone and don't talk to anybody outside of school
>>710657950
Okay OP, I'm gonna tell you a quick story
>Be me, 13
>Really depressed
>try to klil slef
>Literally next day get the girl
>>710679305
It's not just that anon....I do martial arts 5 times a week and go to univ and still feel like shit, I never got used to being around people. Don't get me wrong I don't hate being around other people or anything it's just that I don't feel any different than just staying in my room alone for the rest of the day, people tire me, I barely manage to have a long conversation with someone else because their topics are always the same and boring, nothing interesting it just doesn't feel right, i don't know how to explain it. You can improve yourself if you want to, positive mental attitude is everything but you also have to have some goal, something in life, something or someone you want to improve for, in my case i have nothing and no one, i feel no connection with people, i talk to them but that's it, i don't feel sorry for them if something tragic happens to them i don't feel happy for them if something good happens to them i just can't relate to them, maybe it's because i never experienced it, i never was someone to hang on to people. They always called me arrogant and stuff because i would barely talk with them when in reality i don't talk to them because i simply don't feel a connection. Anyway i am still young, 19 y.o but can't really say i experienced true love, true happiness, fuck, i can't even remember the last time i was truly happy for something, every day that passes seems pointless i can't manage to find a reason to life, everything seems unreal to me, i can't see myself doing normal stuff or improving myself simply because i don't want to, i don't think there is something wrong with me, i just simply can't see why i would want to improve myself for the others when the others mean nothing at all to me, everything seems just pointless.
tl:dr not everyone can make it
>>710669433
I've got ya m8. We all do
I'm sorry it had to be this way anon. I'm a total newfag and I just started using this website because I really don't have anything else I want to do. I see a lot of these types of posts an I fear the day that I will post something like this. I just want to be happy again, and knowing that if you haven't given up on life tonight, then I don't want to either.
>>710680483
Lookup existential nihilism it matches up pretty accurately with what you and I are feeling
>>710680166
girls are suckers for good bodies. test your confidence by going up to girls and try to maintain a conversation. The goal is to get their number; it doesnt matter if u call them or not its just to test if girls find u attractive. If u think one of them will spark a decent friendship, take her out for a movie or coffee, girls love free shit.
>>710676469
These are the feels I need
>>710681359
omg you guys are fucking retarded. existential nihilism? what kindof bouji retarded shit is that? fuck out of here you dont know what real depression is like u little shit
OP here, Well thanks for the positive shit you guys said, something I wasn't expecting.
As for what my brother did to me, he used me as his fucktoy for like 6 a 7 years after, mentally scarring me and making my mind completely dark. First girlfriend I had after a while I told her after which she started abusing (because my brother forced himself one me I always become submissive during sex) me because she was into that shit. So the rape continued.
I guess only plus side is that after some time I was able to rape them both back at their lowest point but that did my morality no good. A well story for another time
Only some superficial cuts no artery hit so thats good so Imma head to bed I'm tired and first thing Monday I'll go to the doctors to get myself some anti-depressants maby get some more closure
>>710680483 here
shut the fuck up >>710681837 with your depression if you think your life is so important for someone else to worry about your problems you have to grow the fuck up, depression is just in your head your problems mean nothing, just excuses that you make to not feel so miserable that you are a failure
>>710680483
Youre right. Motivation hit me like a train one day and i decided to go running. I was just tired of being a fucking loser and i wasn't helping myself by continuing my lifestyle. Im 19 too and trying to get as great of a body i can and hoping to run the nyc marathon two years from this upcoming one before i turn 25 because honestly when youre 25 this beta austist shit really has to end or ur fucked in life.
Just think about that girl that dropped u into this cesspool of shit or any other hot girl u couldnt imagine being with because they are too good for you. YOU CAN get these things but only if you believe in yourself. If you doubt yourself, others will be turned off by you.
>>710682049
Goodnight and good luck anon.
If any anons want to add me. I feel like dying too but if you wanna talk or just relate feel free to add me.
http://steamcommunity.com/id/creepachuu/
>>710682255
Great to hear that anon keep up the positive thinking and you'll see that you will improve greatly.
As to the other thing, i have nothing to improve for and honestly i am not feeling miserable about anything, i always was bullied throught all the middle school and then i moved to italy to continue studying for high school since my parents were already here for about 2 years back then, and i never made any friends here, i mean sure i went out like twice with some class mates but idk that's just it, as for the girls things, i always was used by people, i always wanted to help people when they were feeling down and were sad and i was succsessful and that was were it ended with me helping them and then going back to being ignored until someone needed me again, at first it hurt me, being used like that and having no friends, i was always the one that offered help and support when someone needed it but i never recieved even a little bit of support when i needed it and now i got used to it i guess. I don't really care about improving my life since i don't have this great goal in life to get a wife start a family or smth, i don't think i will ever have a family i just don't see myself as being a family man or even married, people don't mean much to me but i always try to make everyone happy even now because i know how weak some people are, me, sure i got strong and just don't care about anything people say or do to me anymore but some people are weak and get offended and sad from every little thing now it's just pathetic. Again i don't think there is something i want to improve for me, i am glad you and every one else can improve and feel better about yourselves but for me, i think this is the most i can do, at least the most i want to, i have nothing to improve for.
>>710682138
says the person that has to refer to themselves for a sense of identity on a fucking anonymous board , what a loser
and depression is backed by evidence, your little nietzsche 2hip4u shit is retarded
>>710684031
sure anon here look at all this evidence, depression is a real problem go pay 80 dollars for an hour with a shrink and also pay for these pills to make you feel less miserable about your life. Jesus fucking christ dude shut the fuck up already
>>710684250
wow do u have the downs
>implying that depression can only be cured with medicine/shrink
>implying that depression doesnt come in different levels of severities
>implying that depression is just about " feeling less miserable about your life"
if you say that you you go about your life claiming that "life has no meaning" or some shit, you have a mild form of depression you degenerate
>>710684031
You are explaining a symptom of depression in this stupid way like you're 14 years old that read his first philosophy book and went on tumble too much. learn to read some scholarly works
>>710684436
i am not claiming life has no meaning, i am saying i can't find a meaning, for you maybe it has for others it doesn't, the answer to what is life depends on who you ask, what i am trying to say is that depression is not something serious, it's all in your head, it's a form of egoism, let's say you feel depressed because you have no social life, do you really think that is a problem? there are people that have much worse lives than you, you have access to the internet you have a roof over your head, people go into depression because they can never settle for what they have, they always want more, you never stop from wanting more to just enjoy what you have now, and honestly feeling sad because you don't have a certain thing is a childish behaviour
>>710676469
>>710676428
>>710676396
>>710676356
>>710676297
thanks for the feels, ill follow suit my favorite new feels post is Adonis's story, mostly because hes a bro in these threads.
>>710677944
Yeah she was going on about how she wanted to die and how she felt bad so I was about to leave her because everyone said she's just bringing me down. She left me and I've been bawling since. But ya.... fuck her
Does anyone need a friend, or just someone to vent to? Because I need a friend. Just someone I can burn the midnight oil with. God do I need someone like that.
>>710685668
Hey man I could really use someone. Can we talk over texts or kik or something?
>>710659493
Cool story man!
>>710685813
I've got a throwaway skype. I'm a poorfag so no phone, I just survive on a tablet laptop thing. Just look up John Doe. I'll be under zaphod.beeblebrox3400. If you don't got skype it supports texts, it's free, and it takes about 30 seconds and an email address to sign up
>>710685933
well if this is unironic, im glad you enjoyed it, it was nice to get off my chest. -Glaucus
yea... im still lurking.
>>710686138
fyi use a vpn like speedify if your skyping bare ip
>>710686289
I use one too
bump
I dont know why, but this piano song makes me feel kinda melancholic
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G7vqIV6ppB4
>>710686138
Sent a message that says "hey anon"
>>710672194
for a while*
>>710687023
If you're corbin I got it
>>710659493
I'm sorry anon
I hope life is going fine for you
Do it we will miss you but understand, don't do it good for you keep on fighting. Here have a giggle on me!
>>710687567
well since june, ive hit my own "Event Horizon" i broke down after he was gone, i left law entirely, and now work at a small linux startup. The story you read has changed every aspect of my life around, im estranged from my relatives, i know live in a small apartment. i changed everything for a fresh start. things are in the middle of the road right now. well if you cared enough to read this thank you. the basic thing it comes down to is that im more or less lost right now. -Glaucus
>>710672194
Let's see moar.
Keep fighting the Good Fight, OP
Dying now would leave so much undone
If you can't find a reason, make one
Before you go to the Dark, drag down as many motherfuckers as you can with you
Go out with a bang and be remembered
bump
>>710686219
surprised you really interrupted your life for 7 years just to fish crabs with your friend though
>>710687940
You'll find your way eventually. Just keep your feet moving and I'm sure you'll find some reason to keep going. Sorry to hear life's being a dick right now. as far as your professional life goes you sound like a chameleon. I mean from law to fisherman to linux-ing you sound like a pretty interesting guy. I hope you find happiness anon, I'm sure Max would be glad to see you moving forward in life
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dluD8eyPk94
>>710689169
>>710689169
i am too, i didnt leave when i knew about the antidepressants, i just stayed with him made steady cash, and spent my life as usual. My life would definitely be different if i continued law, maybe better. But i enjoy moving around and working everywhere, crab fishing was fun until that day. So i had incentive to be with my friend, and enjoy living by the ocean working with a group of people i knew very well.
I'm 18 and my sisters and parents are convinced I'm gay because I've never had a girlfriend and I've never talked to them about girls. It makes me pretty fucking sad. :(
>>710689294
thank you anon, sincerely thank you. this is great advice, i wish i had a rebuttal for you, but you laid out everything neatly and constructively helped me, so thank you.
>>710690171
/b/ro, if my parents ever thought that I'm gay they would literally kill me. In the real sense of the word. Kill me. It's actually legal here. Thankfully I'm a homophobe and believe that if a man or woman has gay sex s/he should be killed.
>>710657950
i miss when it was just furfags and music fans that were fucking up the internet by being pussies....
>>710690406
so whats it like being arab anon?
bump
>>710690663
I am sad for the days of pre 2008.... it used to be so much fun to be a troll, i used to raid fuckers... Now the internet is shitty because no one does it for the lulz anymore.
>>710657950
Sharing my advice.
You were given a body you ungratefull fuck,
reached a point where you basically wasted it beyond restoration and now considering a pussy like way out from life.
There is no way out from life.
You will live, forever.
You will just loose the body.
And all that what brought you to this place. All that anguish and suffering I believe you went through.
You will go through that again, from the very beggining.
Life won't be rewarding, won't be even slightly pleasurable. That's not the point.
You are here to suffer, swallow it like a man. Maybe that'll teacher you a thing or two
Tl;dr: heroing just make you repeat the cycle
>>710669433
2 years ago. She told me she felt nothing towards me one day later.
>>710690406
Eh, I have no problem with gay people. It's just sad that my family would assume I'm into men because I've never had a girlfriend, at the age of 18. Like... why can't they think that it might possibly be another reason?
My love said she doesn't even platonically love me.
Feels...really good man...
>>710691096
Wow - Whose the girl in the pic?
>>710690967
Pussy failtrolls, and fags were all there were to try to false dmca. also trolls had a positive rep amongst normal people. We exposed pedos, Anonymous, and my old trolling acquaintance on yt... TheCanCollector, Ultraforge was around, We successfully ran wolfeedarkfang, and a bunch of zoophiles off... and ran the furfags off youtube... And the pussies... and the Amazing atheist focused on Actual religious videos... I miss pre social marxist and SJW world... and youtube. also this kind of fucking trolling brothers.
>>710690283
you got it man. glad to hear it helped.
>tfw when you will never have a girl starstruck over you like she was high school teenager
>>710691418
No idea tbh
MFW i am in the south and have similar problems....
>>710691096
Trans? or just not able to get one or one you agree with?
>>710691586
I missed out on careless teenage love. Sneaking out to see each other. Having sex in abandoned places. Thinking we're going to be together forever.
Sucks fam.
>>710691595
"Allisen Casey" apparently
>>710691737
I actually did. I was more saying no women will ever act like that ever again because we're out of high school.
Fucking Feels Bad Man
>>710691623
I'm just terribly insecure and boring. Have had social anxiety even as a kid. Despite all that the girls I was interested in I was rejected by. Oh but no, I must be gay.
>>710671822
4 am should be replaced with 4chan
>>710691737
as someone who has experienced it, its overrated. just horny bullshit.
>>710692117
Nothin wrong with being gay anyway, though. Or trans. I hear ya though. I had a thirsty fat fuck who pretended to be gay to be besties with girls, essentially paint me as someone who beat women, and had people call me to threaten me when i was trying to go out with a girl he was obsessed with.
he was a fat slob no one wanted to be with, and i hope he dies alone considering the fucker ruined my rep. i would claim to be gay too if the fattest and ugliest girl in school denied me. he was a faggot, and i hope he dies, especially after what he did to my reputation. I will end up having to move out of this goddamn city or state to find someone, and cover my tracks, he seriously stalks me. he may be gay, for all i know.
>>710672194
You fucking cut her out of your life like a tumor.
My ex was exactly like that. Kept trying to bounce back to me when shit went south with her current bf (who was her ex before me)
It's sucks gigantic, C'thulu sized balls, but cut her out.
>>710692664
What a cunt. She thinks she is entitled to you after saying essentially lets break up so i can fuck other guys.
>>710692536
Definitely nothing wrong with gay, I have gay friends. It's just that they would assume something I'm not for simply not having a girl.
Damn, anon. He sounds fucking mental. No way a sane person would fuck someone like that.
>>710692712
What a bitch
>>710692968
yeah, indeed. I found vid of old trolling group. Al Aqsa Trolling Crew, FCTC and GNAA i was in all this shit. I fought the Scientologists, in Chanology, i fought the AIDS in Habbo... I fought the AIDS in SL FurNation, We closed the pool. I know its stupid what i am reminiscing on, but had death in family, and i focus on other things, because it causes like a Split Personality reaction reaction But I miss the 4chan before cuck threads and constant trap threads...
>>710657950
Hey life is pretty shitty at the moment right? So it can get a lot better. Funny thing is: I've had a gun to myhead before, Im guessing the hammer was half way drawn (revolver) before I changed my mind, i dropped the gun and looked at the clock, as the seconds ticked past I thought to myself "these were almost the earths first seconds without me since my birth"
Can't say I'm 100% satisfied with my life (Who on earth is satisfied in their mid twenties?) But I'm so glad I didn't pull that trigger.
>be me
>13 and depressed
>I meet a girl
>we become friends
>she's an attention whore
>always texting me about her problem
>she wants sympathy
>I'm completely oblivious and give her attention
>start catching feelings
>I think she has feelings for me too
>she comes over to my house
>she holds me and we talk
>she kisses me
>I'm over the moon
>tells me later she isn't feeling a relationship
>she still needs my attention though
>she continues to pretend she loves me
>let her force all her problems still
>Mom becomes worried
>I have no other friends anymore
>all I care about is her
>I get help
>she doesn't like this
>realizes if I get better she can't control me
>tells me not to take my pills
>never says she loves me anymore
>I'm still oblivious and wonder what I did wrong
>says I never help her with her problems
>tell her that it's too much for me to take on
>I just wanted to be happy
>she has no use for me anymore
>I won't blindly follow her orders anymore
>I won't drop everyone for her anymore
>I want my own life
>she's not happy about this
>starts treating me like trash
>everyone sees this and side with me
>I feel truly happy
>>710694122
I feel you. I really have no interest in killing myself but life is fucking painful. I'll just have to ride it out.
remember the good old days?
>>710690171
Easy fix: If they aren't like, hardcore religious and super against porn, save some softcore pictures in a place they will find. Boom, not gay.
>>710694868
Sometimes I legitimately thing about what the world would have been like had the Nazis won. I feel like in a lot of ways it would have been pretty good. No gays, no modern feminism, no people born disabled, etc.
>>710694868
I wish I was a solider during that time. I could fight my heart out and die an honorable death.
>>710694649
Get a hobby, one that requires a lot of time to learn, make it your goal to learn, that's what I did. (Learned a ton about computers)
>tfw you won't have a nice fellow German girl starstruck over you, a handsome, brave Tank Commander in the Waffen SS armored divisons
why live ?
>>710690171
My family has straight asked me if I'm gay before
Inspirational hymn to old 4chan
We raided COS despite foxnewsfags
We closed the pool, when it was infested with aids
we b/rothers had no need for Fame
and they came from the seas Cucks and Traps with their hands, they fucked up our board, and never got banned, Social justice did nothing, but cancer and aids, our freedoms were slain, before our eyes. With three seperate people they shared a cruel joke, to ban b or stop the critique but then our b people knew what must be done, to end the oppression, oh b became one! forged by lulz, Anonymous rose, and drove the cancerfaggots back to LGBT! when the enemies begged for the mercy they lacked , B voices as one shouted No more Newfags! Forged by lulz, our story be told, no faggots can end us, whether Newfags or old...
>>710672194
>>710672194
"But i still want you in my life"
Translation: I want a backup plan.
Cut her out of your life. She is sane enough to plan ahead and use you as a backup plan, she wont kill herself, crazy bitches like to use that as an excuse, they also like to word "bipolar"
CUT HER OFF. You'll be on the path to happiness once you do.
>>710657950
make sure you do it outside, or in a bathtub or something. last thing other people need is you permanently fucking their property-value and causing them to pay thousands for refurbishing a room.
>>710672194
>Bitches that say this
I dunno whether they're trying to let you down easy, of if they're telling themselves "hmm, I can still feel emotionally fulfilled because I know this guy loves me. Therefore, I can use him to keep my confidence up without being intimate. It's win win for me". I'm assuming the latter. What a selfish bitch. Just stop talking to her.
I had to get rid of my ex from social media and throw out all the shit she left at my house. Took a long time to get over it, but that was step one.
>>710695943
Shes a manipulative cunt, tell her to go fuck herself.
>>710676816
Yeah, happens. You'll get over it. Me and my ex used to play Minecraft together (I'm 21, pls no underaged b&) I stopped playing it when we broke up and switched to League Of Legends, but guess what, I've been making a minecraft server for 2 weeks now, this is the first time im thinking of her in years and it doesn't hurt one bit.
>>710659493
well thats sad
>>710695854
God damn man my names Ryan too. Fucking hitting me with the feels and I don't know the person.
>>710672194
don't kill yourself over a woman, dude, it's just too small a thing.
if you really are committed, though, kiss the muzzle of a twelve-gauge. Hemingway knew his shit.
>>710696574
What's going on here. Did she just go from that to "yay gn love?"
>>710675250
What does she like?
>>710657950
do it you wont
>>710696808
I have no clue I never responded to her after that. This was from her not three days ago
>>710689745
doge is resting her head on my leg right now. feels bittersweet man
>>710697822
Wow. This is really confusing.
>>710697822
:(
>>710672194
There is only one way to be happy, and that's to cut contact. You can feign and even convince yourself you're content with being plan B, but there are billions of fish in the ocean. You'll meet another, even if you're a shark.
>>710697822
>710697822
No bitch is worth killing yourself over,
I got turned down today, a girl i love, in fact one of only 2 girls i have ever fallen for. Its painful, but it ain't worth dyin over. Suffering is caused by attachment to the temporary. enjoy it while it lasts. but let go, do not dwell. it will cause heartache. >> I am a buddhist
>>710698519
saved
You'll never be part of the Invasion to defeat the aggressors.
why live?
>>710676469
Jesus fucking Christ, had to hold my breath hoping this didn't go wrong
You'll never defend the Fatherland like your ancestors did
Feels Fucking Bad Man
>>710672215
Mu nigga with a RuneScape name, hell yeah
>>710671822
4 am is also, you know, for people like me who start work at 5
>>710676297
I remember that thread, good story man
>mfw the guilt won't go away
>mfw I'm not sure I'll ever be in mutual love again
>mfw love songs have the same effect on me as actual sad songs
>mfw I'm still insecure
>mfw the inferiority complex won't go away
nights like this one suck
>>710657950
if you keep climbing that tattered rope you'll eventually fall anyway. just cut it yourself.
>>710700532
>>710699555
>>710699577
>>710699777
Only a baww thread gets 3 in a row. You guys are awesome, and I hope you keep trying long enough to live the life you deserve. Hard to think that a couple months ago I couldn't think of a reason to keep living. Keep going anons, you never know when things will turn around.
>>710670901
This.
>>710670901
This got me man...
From another thread
>>710675250
Couch by Benjamin Parzybok
Y'all want my good feels or bad feels?
>>710701608
Aww, he didnt do anything wrong and he probably dies just because he was alone
I have a friend who's way smarter than me, but his family is pretty low income. He makes a 4.0 at one of the hardest schools in the state taking honors classes. He says that his sister is even smarter than he is. He doesn't know if he can afford college, whereas my family makes 6 figures. Sometimes, I wish I could kill myself and ask my parents to stop funding my success and give opportunities to people who have the willpower and smarts to be great.
>>710666485
it's absurd!! I have exactly the same case and problem
>i'm actually serious
>>710702006
Kek
TFW you are a pretrans tg person in the south but you came out people hate you already for being you as a dude, and changing would make people wanna kill you
>>710700359
bruh
>>710700359
Shit.
>>710702511
I'm really feminine as is and people call me a bitch, or treat me like I'm worth less for being that way. It kind of makes you get why women think they're treated differently than men, but saying that makes me a sjw.
>>710703083
I hear ya, my thing is i know its because i am a repressed autogynephilic who is also extremely unhappy with being a dude.
>>710696340
dude, that fucking pisses me off to no avail
>>710700359
That's painful, her dad's supposed to be her superhero.
>>710657950
OP PLEASE READ
I'm not going to tell you to not kill yourself. I'm going to tell you how.
>buy sword, shield, and honey
>go to yellowstone forest
>cover shield in honey, and start walking
> a bear will find you
>kill it.
You will either die like a bad ass or kill a bear with a sword, at which point you will be so hyped on yourself that you will want to live. Worst case scenario: the news tells about a badass who dies fighting a grizzly with a sword.
Thoughts?
>>710702902
well, that one got me a little.
>>710703716
hell because of how much people hate me already,i have been tempted to be like a translesbian Islamic hijab wearing white person to piss all the southerners off. lol
>>710700359
The feels
>>710702984
Holy shit...
>>710701608
>cat in hood
>will bounty hunt for food
Fuck
>>710698635
I'm glad I wasn't here for this :"(
rip Timmy
>>710660773
You sound like the kind of person to suck off your dad
>>710704520
well, this thread was pretty nicely free of assholes until now. hope you feel that little sense of accomplishment.
>>710689958
this hurts
When Based Bob said this, he was dealing with the death of his wife from cancer.
I believe he is right. I know the "good times", I've had them. The problem is that the darkness hasn't waned. It's still here, and isn't going anywhere. Everything went to shit when my ex left. She fucked me, and then broke up with me after 6 years. I've been with girls since then, but it's only made me feel more empty inside. Any girl I've been with since she left has gone to shambles, and it's not been my fault. My last gf literally told me that I was the "perfect boyfriend", but she left because she had to work on "herself" and didn't feel she could devote the time necessary to the relationship.
I don't know what to do anymore. I know that there will be better times eventually, I don't know if I can make it that long. I enjoy cutting myself too much. I like the feeling of the blade slicing my legs, and watching the blood flow all over. It is so cathartic.
I have a friend who I was talking with last night, who opened up and told me that she was a cutter, and wanted me to promise to not hurt myself at least for that night and maybe the next. I think she wanted me to know that there was hope. All I could think about was whether or not she was trying to tell me that she liked me, even though I've known her for years and there's never been any sort of romance on either side before, that I know of. We are the only single people in our group of friends though. But there I was....on her porch, talking about my anxiety, hearing her tell me about hers, and thinking that I needed to be with someone, so it may as well be her. If she made a move, I would immediately jump into her arms. Not because I think that I really like her, but because I need to feel someone close to me. I need to lie next to someone and feel their arms around me. It's not sexual at all. Why do I do this to myself, and believe that any girl being nice to me wants to date me? Every day I hope for death.
>>710704563
The first time someone made a cancer joke about him it just killed it, could never watch it the same way again....
what hurts isn't having friends like this; what hurts is realizing you are one of these people.
>>710704756
You have trust issues I understand. With 3 billion females on the planet it is statistically impossible that none would be interested in you
>>710701608
This fucking hurts man, I was homeless for 6 years after I got back from overseas. Nobody didn't give one fuck about me. I just wanted to be happy and live my own life but even that was taken from me. I was robbed about 6 times over those year; I haven't even seen my son since I left. God man this fucking hurts me
Thought about doing it myself. A lot. I just never went through with it because i keep telling myself soon things might change. They never did...
People around me think i'm normal. They act as if i was and make "normal people questions", in which i usually have to evade or lie so they won't know i'm a complete loser.
Been depressed for about 8 years and counting...
>>710704415
Me with my pup..... without taking it out on her.... I miss my little schnauzer... and border collie...
I buried her under a pine tree... I held her in my arms as she passed.... she gave a death rattle as she put her head in my arm cradled... and drew her last breath. a look of peace and almost love and happiness that she was in my arms. after that my other dog, the schnauzer, never left my side...until she passed of cancer. was always laying by my side or near me. anywhere i was she was. Dogs never break my heart... Until they pass away. i have seen the look of peace in not just animals, but in humans too. my uncle passed a few hours ago... The day before he was looking around the room, and seemed to be seeing heaven. his wife asked him, do you see the gates, and are you gonna pull one over me? keep in mind, his brain was dead from a massive stroke mostly... He smiles, and closes his eyes and kisses her hand. during the night after... he passes away. Sometimes, despite not being a heavy believer in god, i think there is a heaven for good people.
>>710705695
There is a heaven, where no evil is found
>>710705940
I hate myself more than anything. I cannot stand my lack of friends really. The only friends i have are my Sis and Bro in law, and family and, besides my Sis they are all elderly... Most of my family are over 50.. and the few friends i had, always leave. so... theres nothing really left but to Focus on loving solitude here.
Besides my friend, who i blew a relationship with by not engaging, because i don't have a drive for relationships with women, despite being interested in her... I am almost a self induced Monk. I feel incapable of love sometimes, because i am so detached, due to being overly attached to BPD levels before.
>>710706167
Heaven is essentially your own world after death.
whatever heaven is for you... For me, its the idea of Being able to free the world of the pain it endures now. If i could have all the money in the world or peace on earth, guaranteed, and no more wars and death, i would choose no more wars or human induced suffering upon others.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yjx8ye1T-V8
Fiddler on the green
>>710705276
How could she fuck me two days before she breaks up with me? After 6 years too? She wanted to do it at a Starbucks. She asked to meet me there on Saturday, February 28th 2015. I told her if she wanted to dump me, she'd have to come to "our" apartment and do it. I wasn't going to have a mental breakdown in public.
That bitch is engaged to someone else now. After all the stuff that she was "afraid of commitment" and "didn't know what she wanted", barely a year later and she's engaged.
Everything since then has been downhill. I'm not doing anything with my life. I'm a college grad, working a shit job that barely pays the rent. I'm not going anywhere. I'm not advancing. All I want in life is to get married and love someone until I die. It's so stupid, I don't know if it's even possible anymore. I just miss the joy of going to bed every night and someone being there, falling asleep with my arms around them. That was my bliss.
I'm so close to 30 now. Most of the women that I am attracted to are already in relationships, engaged, or married. Sure, some of the women in the world will be attracted to me, but I probably will not like them back. It happens every so often. I feel with every passing day that I will be alone forever. The dream that I had isn't possible anymore. That's what makes me want to die. What's the point without real, true love?
>>710706398
Loneliness has been killing me too. Everyone from my family has many friends, make new ones from time to time... Me? Nope. 26 and lonely as fuck. Never had gf or anything and just keep going on pretending i'm normal everywhere i go.
I posted this last night on a separate feels thread, but I was pretty proud of it.
(1/3)
>be me
>senior in HS
>another sleepless Friday night
>at moms
>moved to my dads freshman year, my mom was devastated
>I drive up ever other weekend or so, when I dont work or I dont have plans
>looking around old room
>find old ipod shuffle with its charger still in
>fuckyea.jpg
>charge it up real quick
>plug in some headphones
>first song that comes on is Nothing by The Script
>flashback to middle school
>back when I still lived in moms town
>first day of 6th grade
>qt3.14 walks through the door
>my first crush I'd ever had
>too beta to even try and talk to her
>get my friends to hype me up one day
>gather enough confidence to talk to her
>become somewhat good friends
>later on down the road, ask her if she wants to go on a date
>immediately shot down
>but Im persistent
This goes on for a little under a year, into 7th grade
>>710707263
(2/3)
>one day in 7th grade, she says yes
>wat.jpg
>"I'll give you a shot, and I'll be your girlfriend, anon."
>literally the happiest Ive ever been
>two weeks in, take her to go see a movie
>shitty horror flick, but I'd been saving up for it
>working extra chores and mowing a fuck ton of lawns, saving up for the date
>pay our way in, share a large popcorn and a large drink
>my best friend and her best friend were dating at the time
>they tag along with us
>try to put my arm around her during the movie
>fuck it up like the beta fag I am
>she says I hurt her neck or something
>"Anonette, I am SO sorry"
>assholes behind us laugh at how beta I am
>after the movie
>"Anon, we're over"
>heart shatters
>"this was all just a dare, anon. My friend dared me to date you. I felt bad for you, so I just went along with it. Im sorry."
>tell her its okay, walk home with best friend
>spend the night at his place
>cry myself to sleep on his floor
>after the break up, her and I become super close friends
>we stay up until 3 in the morning some nights sharing songs we found, mostly love songs to each other
>the song we both love to death is Nothing, we both jam out to that song constantly
>think I have another chance
>last day of 7th grade
>walking anonette to her moms car
>"I'll miss you, Anon."
>cant believe what I just heard, do my ears decieve me?
>"I'll miss you too, Anonette."
>we hug
Music for this thread
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iRUD2Daz5q8
>>710707417
(3/3)
>text her over the summer
>her friend finds out anonette cuts herself
>even I didnt know this
>see picture
>her thigh is torn to absolute shreads
>just like my heart
>Anonette is forced to go to therapy because of the cuts
>asshole therapist says Im the mental stressor causing the cuts, and makes Anonette avoid me
>first day of 8th grade
>Anonette ignores me, never talks to me even if I beg her to
>get depressed
>try and make her jealous
>dad takes me weight lifting
>become alpha as fuck
>start pulling bitches left and right
>only doing this for attention from Anonette
>go through 20 girls, Anonette doesn't give a shit
>she starts flirting with my friends in retaliation
>depressed as fuck still
>go through all of 8th grade without her talking to me
>final dance night
>the 8th grade banquet
>dance with all my friends, party, laugh, cry a little
>I know I'll never see these guys again, Im moving to a high school in a different town
>final goodbyes
>Anonette is handjng out hugs left and right
>go in for one
>I dont even want this hug for romance, just to tie up loose ends and get some closure before never seeing her again
>she grimaced, stepped back, and helf out a hand for a handshake
>snap.jpg
>"FUCK YOU, ANONETTE."
>absolute shock on her face
>storm out of the hall
>never talk to her again
Its been forever, but Im considering texting her again. I chickened out of it last night, but she's still on my mind
>wat do
I am literally wish for vengeance through divine retribution sometimes, not that i would do anything, but i feel like on death, due to the hatred sometimes i hold in my heart i would be like the ghost from the grudge. Its not to sound edgy, its part of my belief system after all. Those are hungry ghosts and vengeful ghosts. those who find no peace in death, and no solace, and have nothing but contempt for people, instead of trying to help others... as much as i want to, they act like i don't exist, like i am like a horror movie villain. stupid comparison? yeah probably. but I feel like i exist on the same level as the grudge does to most people. i do not. No one really wants anything to do with me besides family, unless they want something.
>>710704487
That'd be a great premise for a game.
>>710707119
One of the last things my ex said to me before she broke up with me was that she would always love me, only a couple of days after she left me she was already fucking somebody else.
>>710707588
Here I am at step 2
>>710707687
>>710707746
i feel like someone who holds contempt for mistreatment of himself and loved ones and the innocent, becoming a vengeful spirit to rain judgment on the wicked, would be a good basis for a game to some degree.
