>ctrl+f "feels" >0 results feels thread. let's
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
>ctrl+f "feels"
>0 results
feels thread. let's bawl together, b. here's my story.
>be me
>like a decade ago
>junior high
>"fuck everything i wanna kill myself" all this angsty shit, right?
>basically i'm a dumbass
>only have a few friends but that's fine by me
>best friend's name is arielle
>she has long black hair
>similar interests, all that
>never really had a friend this close before
>in retrospect, never really had friends before that
>it's nice to feel like you belong
>call on skype every night
>talk about vidya and anime and other stupid shit
>the internet is cool i guess
>she likes the legend of zelda
>thatsprettygood.tiff
>still kinda depressed, not sure why
>arielle makes it alright though
>we both have problems and we help each other out
>find out that she cuts herself
>never really knew what self harm was until that point
>worried about her, i think. don't really understand cuz i'm a moron
>doesnt really click at the time that i'm being a dipshit with my "depression"
>she has real problems and i'm just a loser, etc. i want to help
>start noticing scars on her arm at school. it feels bad.
>kind of develop a small crush on her but whatever we're just friends
>hang out at school and talk on skype every afternoon
>i love hearing her sing and talk about stuff i didn't really understand. shes really smart
>not sure why we don't actually hang out irl outside of school but idgaf
>6th grade, decide to ask her to the school dance near the end of the year
>nervous as shit
hit the line limit or some shit. continuing.
continue, im reading
>>708009056
Cont
(Pro tip: type everything first, then make thread and just paste the story part by part so it doesnt take too long)
>>708009056
Cont
>she accepts
>we go to the dance I'm sweating like fuck
>some stacy starts teasing arielle so we have to leave early
>I go back to her house to comfort her
>first time in a girls house
>I'm sweating like a rabid dog
>she starts to touch my cock in her room
>instant diamonds
>i start to touch her breast
>all of a sudden
>her mom opens the door
>get on the floor
>everyone walk the dinosaur
>>708009056
¿Fuck, op, whats taking so long?
>>708009056
>never really asked a girl out before
>deduce that theres probably a certain charm to not giving a shit
>just not thinking about what you say
>like "holy shit this guy doesnt give a fuck i guess i gotta go out with him"
>or something
>just sitting there at lunch next to her one day
>this is my chance
>fear of rejection, but fuck it lads
>hey
>"whats up"
>do you wanna go to the dance with me
>"uhh sure"
>tfw it was that easy
>oh shit im going to the dance with arielle
>hype
>going to the dance costs like $5 or some shit
>taking admission at lunchtime
>go up and pay for myself and her
>she's like holy shit you didn't have to do that thanks
>i'm suave as shit, basically
>later that week, it's the dance
>it's nothing formal. just wear regular clothes. stay after school in the cafeteria
>"dance"
>there's a dj and shit lol
>shitty outdated music
>i may as well not have asked her out, we're just hanging out like normal
>i'm fine with that i guess
>sitting outside on some benches by the basketball court
>pretty awkward
>she turns to me, "sorry"
>wat
>she walks off
>this is fucking middle school wtf
>what i do wrong
>hope this doesn't fuck up our friendship
>feel like shit
i later found out that some other guy named garett had a crush on her and she felt bad for him so she "broke up" with me so he didnt feel bad. like what the hell arielle. you lovely, selfless fuck. i wonder how shes doing. anyway
continuing
>>708010127
you're not op my dude
>>708010347
Nuh-uh
building a screenshot, I got this covered bros.
>>708010347
>in typical mid-puberty fashion, blow everything out of proportion
>she hates me she hates me she has to hate me
>want2die.wav
>looking back i was so fucking cringe. and i don't like saying cringe. but fuck
>talk to her that night on skype
>"i'm sorry"
>oh, uh, it's fine
>why is she apologizing to me
>i'm sorry too
>"no no no you didn't do anything. it's my fault. i'm sorry."
>worried about her
>you didnt do anything either. it's all just stupid. i don't know. i'm a mess.
>"its okay. um, i i have to go."
>where? arielle?
>call ended
>im freaking out. shes legit suicidal and shit.
>try to call her on skype and text her and call her on the phone
>nothing.
>radio silence.
>ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
>not a fan of this predicament tbh
>try to sleep that night. havent heard anything
>theres actually nothing more i can do for now but hope shes not kill
>dont hear anything the entire weekend
>she knows i worry about her why is she doing this if shes fine
>kind of pissed but also worried sick
>school monday
>nervous. where is she
>see her walk in
>ARIELLEEEEE
>feel like weight lifted off my shoulders
>she ignores me
>she doesnt sit where she usually sits, next to me
>she goes and sits at some random table just to avoid me
>idk what i did but it fuckin hurts
>still have other mutual friends but she is my connection to them
>if i lose her, i lose everyone
>pretty sure i'd be miserable or some shit
>wait out the day
cont. sorry for being slow i was taking a shit
bumping so it wont 404
Bump for end. Keep posting anon
Sure I'll give it a bump as well.
Bumping for feels.
boring as fuck but bump anyway
bump
bumping
>>708011585
>miserable all day
>she sits someplace else at lunch too
>i sit with usual people
>i dont really talk at all
>just feeling bad
>day ends, go home. didnt say one word to her.
>idk what i did wrong this sucks dick
>this goes on for most of the week
>pretty bummed
>that weekend she calls me on skype
>answer that shit so fuckin fast
>hey
>"hey, uhhh i i don't know. uh i knew what i was gonna say but it's slipping my mind now haha."
>ok
>"i'm sorry for being like this. i've been being an asshole. i don't know what i'm doing. are we cool? are we good, or whatever?"
>yeah we're good. i've just missed you all week
>basically things go back to normal
>she starts dating people
>jealous.jpg
>she tells me on skype about shit she does with them/him
>feels BAD
>"yea i sucked his dick"
>YOU ARE LIKE 12 YEARS OLD ARIELLE
>STILL JEALOUS THO
>tfw i'm not that guy
>it's not about getting my dick wet
>it's about her
>feel like i'm in love with her
>"love"
>i always felt like she felt the same but i never really understood hints ever
>in retrospect she literally dropped hints all the time
>i was a jackass, we've been over this
>she tells me that a mutual friend of ours has a crush on me
>her name is shelly
>oh i know her she's cool
>...she's not arielle tho
>roll with it
cont.
>>708013197
I used to date a chick who would act in the exact same manner, but every time she would say she was sorry, then do everything again, and I leg her do that for over a year because I liked her so much. She still hits on me from time to time because we are in the same school and have the same friends so we end up seeing each other frequently. Know your feels fellow anon, continue your story.
please continue op
hurry OP
>>708013197
>start talking to shelly more
>she's cute. she's cool
>still long for arielle
>talk to shelly on skype sometimes
>growing distant from arielle
>not a fan of this
>i might have a crush on her but she's still my best friend
>skyping shelly one night
>she tells me that arielle has a crush on me
>what the fuck
>they literally drag me into a group on skype and its the three of us
>asking me to choose between them
>are you fucking kidding me with this horseshit
>both of them have 0 self-confidence
>shelly wants me to date arielle
>arielle wants me to date shelly
>god fucking fuck come on
>this goes on for a few days, i dont choose anyone
>eventually decide god dammit fuck
>arielle wants me to choose shelly right
>and arielle is who i want
>so i should listen to her and date shelly right
>flawless fucking logic
>start going out with shelly
>she lacks the charm that arielle always had
>arielle has always seemed like mysterious and cool
>i wanted to discover more about her
>shelly was not this
>nothing against shelly, but arielle was like the goddess to me
>i dunno
>"dating" was basically sitting together and holding hands sometimes
>this is junior high
>didnt kiss anyone until high school
>shelly always feels like i want arielle
>and shes not wrong but
>but i like them both?
in retrospect i was leading her the fuck on. i liked her but i don't think it was ever in that way. i feel like a dick but whatever
>i want to please arielle
>man im a prick
cont.
bebump
does anything happen or this shit just a middle school sob story
bump
I hope nobody dies. or else my week is ruined.
>>708010074
listen to anon next time ples
>>708014423
The same shit happened to me in junior high. Like all of it but it was in person because Skype didn't exist. I feel your pain op
>>708014423
Your story has many similarities to some stuff I went through OP, I can greentext it after you are done if anyone is interested
>>708013724
>>708014994
Interest I've had a similar experience
Taking another shit, OP?
>>708015129
Alrighty, I will start typing it and when OP is done I post it
>>708014423
>eventually shelly and i break up
>things are all awkward
>feel like a loser but still lusting after arielle
>summer happens. dont talk to her as much
>beginning of 7th grade year now
>arielle and i still talk on skype sometimes but it's not the same
>the distance is palpable
>i feel alone
>start getting depressed
>i don't know what depression is at the time so i just describe it as being tired
>being sad
>don't understand
>feel like i don't have any friends and shit
>feel like a downer if i try to talk to someone
>dont want to bother people with my bullshit feelings
>i cant fucking articulate how i feel very well when i get the chance
>arielle listens and nods and smiles very convincingly but i probably sound crazy
>start missing school because im a depressed lonely sad fuck or something
>i thought life sucked before or whatever but man this really sucks
>i don't understand at all why i feel this way
>but it sucks
>i wasn't diagnosed with depression until my sophomore year but that's another story
>near the end of the first semester of 7th grade
>around november, december
>talking to arielle
>"hey. my mom can't find work around here. and she needs a job. i'm moving to georgia this winter."
>fucking devastated
>i thought i was alone before but now i'm really alone
>get even more depressed
>realize she was really the only tie i had to my other friends
>feel more alone and sad than ever
>everything is shit
continuing. next one is the last one, friends.
>>708014994
i'd love to hear it
>>708015395
Sounds good the the girls in my situation were named Starr and Bethany
Bethany is a cunt and I gave her address to a local rapist but nothing ever happened. I'm still in contact with Starr. She's a good friend she's like 30 something and she likes edgy stuff 13 year olds today like
bump
bump
>>708015730
>we talk maybe once or twice after she moved, but not much else
>miss her like crazy
>i cry a bit because she's gone and she was my best friend
>i come to realize she was all i really had
>never talk to anyone at school
>no one ever talks to me
>it's miserable. it's really miserable
>barely make it through middle school
>high school still sucks
>barely feel alive
>hear from arielle once my freshman year
>we talk on skype, on cam
>she has a chessboard on her cam and i tell her where to move my pieces
>we're playing chess
>it feels nice to talk to her again
>she has a new boyfriend she tells me about
>im glad she's doing well
>i made other friends myself in time but i never had any friends in person
>the internet is cool, right?
>still depressed. we caught up a bit.
>she's doing alright. and i tell her i'm fine.
>it's nice.
>life is alright, i suppose.
fast forward to this morning, saturday, october 15th, 2016
>hear from an old friend i hadnt heard from in ages
>her name is samantha
>she asks if she can call me am i busy
>uhhh no im not busy. call me
>she calls me
>she sounds teary-eyed
>"hey... uh. i've just been going around to some old friends all day. letting people know the news."
>what
>"um arielle, from middle school. i'm sure you remember her, uh... she- she committed suicide thursday night.""
>oh my god
>start to tear up
>"i just thought you should know. i know you two were close"
>i hear she starts crying a bit but she composes herself
>i say thank you. it was good to hear from you.
>"you too."
>i hang up
i just wanted to share this.
she was a wonderful person. and a wonderful friend.
that's all. you can share your stories. i'll be listening.
Come on
>>708016845
>>708016845
If its true I feel you OP. Dont really have much to say. Just know that someone far away from you wishes you luck.
>>708016845
Sweet fucking hell. Feels, Just know that love was true anon. I hope you're doing well. Thank you for the story.
this is one a little complicated
>be me
>met girl online awhile ago
>She started messaging me again
>meh
>go along with it
>I know whats gonna happen
>basically a repeat every time she wants to get back in touch
>Have no one else and nothing better to do
>I go with it
>by week 2 she does this I'm in love with you shit
>go with it knowing whats gonna happen
>she starts dropping hints that she wants to get dirty
>knowing this is nearing the end
>play dumb and dismiss them on purpose
>fuck it
>give in
>start sexting
>she wants pics
>meh
>she lives about 1500mi away anyway
>fuck it
>knowing there's about a week left before she decides to leave again
>start losing feelings for her on purpose
>called it
>guess what
>she blocks me on her social media
>wow big surprise
>meh
>fun while it lasted
>same shit happened every other time
>don't miss her since I know she's gonna pull this shit again
>>708009056
>>708010127
>>708010347
>>708011585
>>708013197
>>708014423
>>708015730
>>708016845
SCREENCAP
I love you OP, stay strong
Ok I said I had a similar story so i ll post it, sorry if i take to long or sound dumb
>be me
>14
>dont have any deep friendships but i have a group of ppl i hang out with in school
>never been to a doctor to get diagnosed but very depressive and suicidal
>girl, will name her Layla, that was always alone, is invited to our group for a school project and starts hanging out with us, turns out she is very nice and interesting
>grow a crush on her, but dont really talk to her
>summer vacation, im absolutely isolated and about to kill myself
>Layla out of nowhere texts me and starts small talk with me, no one had ever done that to me so it feels very special to me to have someones attention and interest
>seems like she is into me too
>dont kill myself, vacation is over
to cont.
>>708016845
I'm so sorry, stay strong OP
>>708017821
continuing
>we start frequently talking to each other alot in person and in text
>we would stay up till late at night texting one another even though we had to get up early because school
>turns out we have a lot in common in every possible way, it seems impossible
>i never dated a girl and had very low self esteem so i wouldnt pick up on hints that she had interest on me
>we become extremely close friends, go out and talk all the time, ppl refer to us as a couple
>one day we go out to a park with some other friends, Layla seems kind of distant
sorry, took too long because im writing the whole thing at once and got distracted
Anyone want me to keep going?
>>708009056
Nothing can be said that will cheer you up at the moment. I am truly sorry for your loss OP. I hope you find a way through this awful situation
>>708019158
I'm still reading
>>708019158
go on
>>708016845
Yeah the second girl I mentioned, Bethany, was a bitch.
>be me 7th grade long hair, pretty edgy
>know a girl named Starr introduces me to Bethany
>blah blah blah
>Bethany is slowly making me want to kill myself
>too stupid to realize
>this girl is a leech
>she takes happy people and takes their happiness and makes them depressed
>if happened to me
>Bethany and I start dating
>she makes me feel guilty for being happy
>She brainwashes me into hating Starr my best friend
>Bethany constantly says "oh I wanna kill myself and you aren't helping"
>blaming me
>start cutting
>feelsgoodmanbutfeelsbadmanatthesametime.png
>fast forward to the summer of 7th grade
>still dating her
>she's touched my cock
>I touched her boobs
>still brainwashing me
>makes me feel like shit for trying to clean up my life and be a better person
>want to die
>fast forward to July of 7th grade
>she sucked my happiness dry
>I'm empty
>she breaks up with me by pretending to have amnesia
>pretends I don't exist
>when I try to talk to her she says "who are you"
>yet she still hangs out with her friends
eventually I reconnected with Starr and I'm still recovering from the damage Bethany did
Btw, I'm on my phone and moving so not my best greentext
>>708016845
fuck..
>>708019158
yes
>>708019158
Sure
I've kinda got a small baw story but its somewhat drug related, lemme know if anyones interest ill type it up.
On mobile though so it might be a bit slow.
>>708019665
Go ahead anon
>>708019158
keep going im listening
>>708016845
Good story OP, not many stories touch close to home as yours. Sorry for your loss, especially since you've been losing her for so long.
>>708019665
i'm not going anywhere
>>708019158
>friends rent bikes and go around the park, i stay with Layla under a tree because she wanted to sleep there and i didnt want to leave her alone
>Layla says shes really going to sleep so i shouldnt bother her
>she puts a coar over her head and just lays on the grass
>i say something close to "lol you arent actually gonna sleep like that, are you?"
>she responds kind of mad, grabs her phone and doesnt talk to me
>tells me sometime later that a friend of hers is passing by because he is walking someones dogs for them so he is gonna come and say hi
>oh ok
>very short 27 years old man with no dogs show up, lets call him Daniel
>Layla and him talk a lot and i just stay there awkwardly
>well ok then didnt expect that
>Daniel leaves, me Layla and another friend go to this friends place
>we talk and start watching a movie
>i sit next to couch next to Layla, we are hugging and cuddling
>i think about kissing her, she has her face close to mine
>scared af cuz very virgin
>parents call me, i jump out of the couch, i didnt expect that
>they used my phone tracker to see were i was, they were there and were going to pick me up at that very moment
>very mad at parents for doing that for no reason, very frustaded i didnt kiss Layla, but oh well
>next day, she asks me to come over to her place, never been there
>i really want to but i live far af, would have to ask for my parents to drive me there, and couldnt do that because we fought a lot and didnt want to talk to them
>she insists but i was stupid and ended up not going, i say im sorry
>she is kind of sad about it, she really wanted me to go
>doesnt affect our relationship, we move on
my internet is very bad so its taking a long time to upload, sorry
>>708019808
Gotcha.
>be me
>grow up kinda a shitty wee, picked on, family problems, etc
>had one pretty sweet group of friends through my whole childhood, all love eachother like family due to the escapism we provided each other
>thanks to home problems i always had a desire for intimate love, maybe because parents were divorced or something psycological idk
>through those years have edgy depression and shit like that, ultimate cringelord in some cases, fuck i was a dumb kid but whatever
>eventually move away from home town, couple states north; mom tumors.jpg ftw
Cont.
>>708009056
hope you enjoy it:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TR3Vdo5etCQ
>>708020521
Jesus what a comic, thanks for opening my eyes anon.
threads like these remind me /b/ really is full of humans
i love you faggots
this one always gets me
>>708020626
Cont.
>new town and school lets me reinvent myself; this is 9th grade-ish, literal late bloomer, basically just decide fuck it and stop being all quiet and shit
>had gfs before but date a couple actual 9/10s and just sorta..reach a sort of psuedo popularity with most of my grade, start coming into my own
>still mostly a nerd but dont engage much in that discussion or activity unless with my two/three close friends there
>eventually date this band chick, who isnt as pretty as the others i had dated there, not by technically usual society terms; but to me she was gorgeous.
>date for a few solid years, have good senses of humor with her, decent sex, etc etc.
>but overall she was kindve a massive cunt that used jealousy and manipulation to rip down that personality i had built & was honestly super proud of.
>back to depression and self doubt; eventually after 4 years decide to dump her even though i still loved her, just couldn't deal with her shit anymore
>she says fine since over the years she had threatened to dump me constantly and i always noooooo'd
Cont.
>>708020606
>on another occasion i did go to her place, turnes out her dogs loved me and that was very rare, she said
>didnt bang her ik i was stupid k
>valentines day comes, i comment i would stay out of home all day waiting for my parents to do whatever, she invites me to stay at her place instead, i say yes and go to her place
>we cuddle a lot hug a lot, from time to time we would just stay silent looking at each others eyes
>i didnt kiss her because i was extremely beta and wanted her to take the inciative
>i go home but ask her to if we could go out the next day, she says she couldnt because she had to go to a family meeting
>well ok then, some other time
>next day, i go to watch a movie with my brother and my father
>having dinner at about 10pm, text her "hey, what did you do today, how was the family meeting?"
>"oh i didnt go to that yet, and i dont even fell like going to it" "today i just stayed home and had the best sex lol"
>i dont know how to react, she said she wasnt able to go out because she had this meeting but instead she stayed home the whole day and had sex
>try thinking to myself "well sex could be something else other than her fucking someone, maybe she masturbated or whatever, stop getting jealous anon"
>im very jealous
>she apologizes for texting that out of nowhere and she doesnt know if im comfortable about it
>"nah it cool lol, well good for you, gtg now sorry, talk to you tommorow"
>next day
>>708020606
still listening do the thing
>>708009056
will you shut your pussy mouth up , faggot?
>>708022350
Kill yourself. This is a feels thread. Go to a cock rate thread or some shit
>>708021391
Cont.
>a day after i leave her she texts me, "hey you" (her cutesy way of always saying hello when she was happy to see me, usually made me melt.
>not this time.jpg
>i was mad
>told her to fuck off, and she did.
>time passes and slide deeper into depression, miss bandgirl. Tries to reconnect but shes moved on, which hurt but i tried. This period of time is what actually led me here so ive only been a lurker since like..late 2014, newfag and all that
>anyways
>months later im just sort of empty and lost, but somehow hopeful, working a decent job and have those same close friends who i love
>awesome people, L, M, and M's gf Kate.
>always doing shit, camping, vidya, ygo, etc. Movies. We loved movies man, any one movie you could either really love or really hate, we saw em.
>but im still somehow in this pit, though im surrounded by good. And that old personality is i suppose making a small comeback. I suppose to them i looked strong because i seemed good. But i was just sort of bitter.
>but the inevitable bad shit; ended up talking to Kate a lot. Bonding.
>she cheated on him, with me. And he was...at the time my best friend.
>and fuck man, ive made my peace with it. Literally. So I'm not going to denounce the whole experience as horrible.
>but for me, with loyalty beinf sort of the cornerstone of my morality for so long before that..it crippled me inside a bit.
>goes on for a bit, she breaks things off with me and they fix things. Which is good, but im ostracized, in a strange place.
>the depression kicks unto overdrive, on top of guilt. Everything bad that happened i told myself i deserved, and i did.
>lost my job since i stopped going in, lost my apartment due to that.
>ended up back with my mom for a bit, didnt do much but work a part-time and play vidya, generally a piece of shit.
Cont.
>>708021878
>next day we text alot, im acting kind of distant, i didnt expected that from her
>talking she mentions that Daniel was at her place the day before, and how the dogs liked him too
>she immediatly realizes that she revealed that she fucked Daniel
>immediatly apologizes a bunch
>i text talking about how i felt betrayed about it, that i thought we had something going on and etc
>she continues to apologise
>feel very bad for her, i never get mad at anyone and much less let it show, so she must be feeling very bad
>text "god i cant believe how Mel (name of one of the dogs) did that to me" so she thinks im talking about the dogs and not us
>she lols, we keep talking like nothing happened
>i cried a lot
continues
>>708022829
bump
>>708022656
Cont.
>eventually reconnect with one of the guys from the old group, my hometown original group.
>call him Josh. Josh was/is the ultimate friend. Bonded over awesome rpgs and have similar ideals and interests, been through the same shit. Back in the day we were inseperable, especially when we realized we had a mutual friend in Harry, who had been my friend since elementary, and was like the groups jolly fat man. Which sounds horrible i guess but to all of us it was just his lot and he bore it proudly.
>anyways
>get to talking about old days, and i had basically stopped being a bro cause i at that time absolutely hated the idea of drugs of any kind; still a bit brainwashed about weed back then. And Josh was essentially the introducer of substances to the group. Essentially just pot back then but during my absense it escalated a lot.
>eventually i decide i wanna come back home; and Josh, being the ultimate bro, understands my plea and helps me out.
>bout two months later im back. Seeing some of the old crew. Josh and Harry were still lucid and around, thank fuck for that.
>start working again, dont really care for the job ut Josh got it for me and hes my ride so i do it; still dealing witj all the guilt and depression from before.
>josh knows all that and is as supportive as anyones ever been, tells me of his history amd how lsd had saved him from suicide
>having already considered lsd before, (basically my view on drugs changed once i alpha'd, fucked my best friends girl, and then got smacked with guilt and realized im not so holier than thou)
>few months pass, some shit happens but we all pull through, not too important
>plug gets found
>and i drop acid for the first time circa few months ago
Cont.
>>708022829
>she acts distant for the next few days, we dont talk as much but still friends
>she would mention Daniel whenever she could to push me away
>i fell very heartbroken because that was my first time actually in love with someone and things were ending, but decide to move on, i was lonely before i can live with it
>she comes back to being intimate with me, we are back at talking to one another frequently
>im stupid so i just stay happy about it
>winter vacation is coming, Layla plays the bass in this music school and she is going to have presentations
>(Daniel plays the guitar in the same school)
>she says that she considers inviting me to it even though she is very shy about that kind of stuff
>we talk about what we are going to do together in the vacation, she says she is going to practicaly adopt me and take me everywhere and im going to travel to her granparents farm with her etc etc etc
>im super happy
>she out of nowhere starts getting distant from me for no reason
>we talk less but im ok with it
>Layla doesnt want me to go to the presentation on her music school, she says she doesnt want to mix different social groups from her life
>i understand that
>winter vacation begins
>we cut contact almost completly and barely talk to one another
continues
>>708009056
i don't know where else to post this...
gf said she doesnt have feelings for me, didnt want to tell me because she was scared we wouldnt talk anymore
idk what to do honestly. i still love her and i don't know if it's best for me stay friends or to try to form a new relationship with her
>>708024425
Anon you should stay friends and pursue new girls
>>708024697
i want to be friends, but i really want to be with her
i cant imagine myself with someone else
thanks for responding
>>708024145
forgot to mention that during the day of her presentation Layla was texting me all the time, she was extremely sad and having a breakdown because Daniel showed up with another girl there. I talk to her until very late at night, she calms down, thanks me a lot and carries on. Next day she told me that that girl was the girlfriend of one of Daniels friends so its alright.
>during the winter vacation we would still text from time to time
>she would mention Daniel and sex with him frequently, i no longer give a shit
>im getting less friendly, back to where i began before i met her, depressive but less suicidal
>vacation is over, we see each other again at school
>goddamit i love her
>we are back to talking to each other
>>708025090
(it continues)
>>708025071
It's s tough situation anon. We've all been there. Try to stay positive about the future and if you can't be with her, be her friend. You'll feel shittier if you lose her for good.
>>708025071
Another anon here.
If you going for the friend route, at least take some time apart so you can disengage emotionally from what you two had. Make sure to let her know that it probably won't be forever, but that you need time to get over breaking up.
If you don't do this, you risk being hung up on her while she moves on.
bump
>>708025387
i just can't move on, i cant get over it
i feel so fucking stupid because i know i have to move on but i cant
i never wanted to lose her
>>708025197
>back at being close friends
>out of nowhere she once again backs off and stops talking to me
>she starts being very bitchy towards me and seems unconfortable talking to me
>i already expected it
>few weeks later she says she is sorry for acting that way, she has done it multiple times and knows it, but she has always been like that and doesnt know why
>i accept her apologies but stop talking to her
>back to depression and isolation
>months pass, i have become friends with some other girl who was constatly hitting on me, lets call her Lucy
>"i say fuck it why not, i like her "one day and decide to try to build a relationship with Lucy
>we become boyfriend and girlfriend
>>708014742
This gif is me the past 3 months
Bump
>>708026254
Listen, anon it might seem like the hardest shit ever right now. But it takes time.
Oc btw
>>708026254
Well that is more of a reason to get some distance, if she's made clear that she doesn't want a romantic relationship, you have to disengage to protect yourself. If you stay in your current state, you'll fuck yourself over and potentially waste a lot of time hoping against hope that things will change.
If she wants to end the relationship, you gotta respect that. On the flip side, if the is committed to this course of action, she has to respect if you need some alone time to get along.
>Be me sophomore in highschool
>stereotypical attractive/popular guy
>Did modeling part time
>The problem was dating
>every girl that ever went out with me, didn't go out for anything regarding my personality.
>my exterior was so amazing, it overshadowed the real me
>i was only the attractive guy, not truly a person.
>knowing how id be worthless without my looks, completely devoid of anything, got to me.
>i spent my time cheating on my girlfriends, for some thrill to take my mind off everything else in my life, or i spent my time isolating myself from those who only saw me as half a person.
>Enter the girl
>the one girl who saw through my exterior, she spoke to me as an equal, to her i was a whole human.
>every other girl i had ever spoken to always tried to do so in a very flirtatious way
>but not her, she was the only person who truly knew me
>We became really close by the end of the year
>Turns out shed been in the foster system since she was 7
>her scumbag biological dad beat her unconscious when she was 7
>She suffered short term amnesia, Brain Swelling.
>CPS took her away after getting checked into the hospital.
>when she was at her most vulnerable, in her most fragile state, she was taken somewhere alien
>she was lost without either parent.
>She told me all of this, and Ive never forgotten it, the true backstory of the one person who'd throughout this year i learned, i was in love with, the one person who gave my life purpose.
>The problem was i was terrified of asking her out, what if we broke up and shed never speak to me again, would i be back to the same person i was before?
cont?
>>708020521
Holy fuck anon I was bout to kill myself but that ending saved me
>>708023933
Cont. Sorry, phone fucked my last attempt to reply to this post.
>it was incredible.
>i was with josh, harry and their excellent friend rob who they met while i was gone
>in one night, in the space of seven hours,i faced and came to terms with all of my demons. Bandgirl, M and Kate, depression, self doubt, desire for intimacy, family history, etc. All of that shit.
>it just..figuratively evaporated.
>on the come down, order 2 because the experience was so magnificient.
>around the same time, new girl starts working where Josh and i work, and immediately become attracted because of physical similarities to Kate from before, especially the smile which is my kryptonite.
>after a few days (retrospect..i know i know. Fucking hell) get up the nerve to try and get her number, not because i really want to go anywhere or do anything with newgirl...just to see if i can.
>personal validation i suppose, or tangible evidence of what lsd showed me
>to my actual surprise, she says yes but kind of..puts it off, which i later realized was her being too polite to say no
>not a big deal, kept moving
>later on, trips again with Josh and his older ex military brother named Michael. Another excellent adventure; where the first one was about discovery, the second was about confirmation. And did it.
>we spent a decent section watching the Yellow Submarine, and while they got blasted by it, the only thing that fucked me up was googling the runtime mid-trip
>i suppose they were impressed i handled 2 so well, keep in mind i was and still am generally a drug virgin
>few months pass without any squares
>eventually new girl kinda becomes part of the group, she inevitably has a crush on Josh, since hes reached sort of the..animal magnetism/casual sex stage of his life
>for a single second it annoys me, but i hurdle that quickly since i saw it coming, and have decided that im more focused on me now rather than someone else
>eventually, new girl trips with us
Cont.
>>708026269
>a few months pass, its summer vacation and im texting with friends in a group text thing idk how to call it
>other people stop talking and its just me and Layla
>our intimacy is very visible, we know each other too much
>we start to talk on private
>hey we need to talk it has been a long time blah blah blah small talk
>Layla wants me to come over to her place som day and watch a movie with her sister and her sisters friend, i say fuck it sure
>i go there, we watch the movie, talk a lot
>during talk we stayed very close, then she would back off and ask me how is Lucy doing and etc, tell her she is doing alright
>i realize that i have been using Lucy just to replace Layla and dont actually like her, i feel like shit
>me and Layla back to talking more often
>i start getting very awkward and distant to Lucy
>i start avoiding Lucy
>school is back, on the first weekend Layla asks me if i want to go to the beach with her
>hell ye i do
>>708021202
Me too anon.
>>708026254
This happens to us all anon. It will happen in time.
>>708016845
op here. i just found this letter. fucking kill me.
>>708022350
Get back to your totally-not-gay-if-it's-a-feminine-penis trap threads, Pedro.
>>708027669
Oh shit man I'm sorry
>>708016845
Fuck this hit hard...sorry for your loss
>>708027299
>on the beach with Layla
>theoretically still Lucy's boyfriend
>i should have broken up with Lucy a long time ago but i didnt
>me and Layla alone on the beach house talking
>i wear her shorts for the lolz
>my boner is very visible on those shorts
>we start getting close
>she sits on my lap
>we start making out
>Layla asks if thats alright, as im dating Lucy
>"yeah i have been thinking about breaking up with her for a long time now"
>we just dont fuck because we hear her dad get in the house
>he sees me on his daughters shorts
>everybody lolz, nothing bad happens
>me and Layla whenever we are alone we are making out and putting our hands here and there, we dont go further than that
>weekend is over
>back in school, i delay for a week but i break up with Lucy
>Layla stops talking to me once again
>mfw that shit again
continues
>>708027165
Cont.
>the trip roster was me, josh, rob, newgirl and their other friend, we'll call her Sam
>it was good shit, me and new girl are on 4, sam and rob were on 6, and josh was on 8, and it was just a rolling good time
>newgirl calls me her anchor at one point mid tripb and later seems to consider me in charge when most people consider it to be Josh, myself included
>its a strange chink in my armor because i had always and still admire newgirl from a distance though theres no emotional input
>shake it off as the trip quickly becomes heavy, newgirl cries as she figures things out, josh is absorbed by the ecstasy of his musical choices, sam seems to think everyone is mad at her, and rob has a full-on egodeath and essentially swallows the rest of the trip in his panic.
>but im still rock fucking solid and even i dont know why, not entranced by anything rhe same as the others
>josh and i are rhe only ones who truly survive the trip super positively, and through discussion decide that my general nihilism and ability to pay attention to the world around me mid trip is why im not swept away
>generally have a good night
>up to now, start having dreams about newgirl; physically it isnt her but my mind registers it as her
>do not want
>not going down any path emotionally with her, since i know it couls cause problems as this is essentially the lsd roster for the future trips; including Michael and Harry
>could cause issues since shes so after Josh but hes very averse and non commital at the moment
>just gonna let the feels die and keep watching fractals and shit
>doing 8-10 hits soon
Thanks for listening anons. Not really too much baw i guess and some of you have it worse, but i felt like getting that out.
If you guys have questions or shit lemme know, ill be lurking.
As ever.
Today marks the 5th anniversary of my fiancées death.
How it happened:
>met at 14
>got together after some months
>been together for 7 years, everything seemed perfect
>both 21
>driving home from a concert, it's snowing
>green light at crossroads, I drive
>a car hits us from the side, the side she's sitting
>car flips, nothing happened to me
>look to the right side, she's bleeding a lot
>she tries to say something..I can't hear it
>she closes her eyes and dies.
The other driver was drunk and drove into red light.
>>708027669
holy fuck anon im so god damn sorry.
>>708028974
It still hurts.
>>708027669
This is fucking ridiculous. I'm so fucking sorry man. I love you.
>>708028974
I really honestly hope this isn't real because it's not fair at all
>>708027669
Trying a bit hard there no ??
>>708016845
Oh shit really tore me up. Hope you're alright OP
>>708028315
>me and Layla get back together
>we stop talking again
>she comes back, apologizes, i accept appologies and appologize too, we go back together
repeat xA Lot
>winter vacation coming
>we are together, at the peak of our intimacy
>she invites me to one of her presentations, this time she actualy lets me go
>there will be two but on the second one she would sing too and ahe didnt want me to see that, italright
>very unconfortable during presentation, Daniel is there and Layla from time to time would be talking to him, hugging him, etc
>dont mind it too much even though im very jealous, she invited me there and i was happy about it
>next day, in school
>Layla was skipping classes because the first presentation went until late at night and she had another one that day, it would be tiring
>i have a huge mark on my neck from making out with Layla some other day
>friend notices, she asks who did that
>i say it was Layla
>ask her not to talk about it with Layla tho, im not sure if she wanted other people to know that we had some sort of relationship
>she talks about it with Layla
>Layla is very mad at me for doing that
>instead of appologising i act stupid and try to escape it and explain myself
>Layla hates that profoundly
>she says she cant trust me anymore
>im in panic, cry lots
>winter vacation begins
continues but its comig close to the present
>>708017580
thank you
>>708029430
shut up bitch nigger
>>708026254
Im in the same boat anon, Ive dated her off and on for 3 years now.. This is the end though. Its hard but we have to move on, for ourselves.
>>708029191
It is.
I feel like I live a completely different life now.
guys just remember things get better
>>708030227
yeah but when
how long do i have to wait for myself in order to continue my life
>>708030339
That's where you wrong.
You don't wait. You change it yourself.
Everything that has happened to you was because of something you did or did not do. So, instead of whining, change something.
>>708030339
You've got things backward. You continue your life little by little and eventually you feel better.
If you just sit around waiting for it, it won't really happen.
>>708016845
RIP OP, stay strong man
>He who sows in tears shall reap in joy
>>708020521
You have opened my mind to a whole new realm of opportunity
this is hard feels
>these kids parents watched three of their kids wither away die of cancer, one by one
link
http://www.nydailynews.com/life-style/health/girl-10-sibling-family-die-cancer-article-1.2534944
>>708029923
kys
>>708029855
>me and Layla barely talking, but this time for a reason
>she would frequently mention another guy, John
>we see each other when going out with a friend in common, we are ok
>text and properly appologize to her (we talked about most things through texts so there wasnt any problem about not being person, we did that a lot)
>she says its cool, and said she was sorry for overreacting
>ask her if she wants to go watch a movie or something
>she says i can come over and will watch something
>there she acts very distant, barely even looks at me, a lot on her phone texting
>i say sorry again about acting stupid the other day, she says its ok
>go home
>we stop talking for the rest of the month until school was back
>we are kind of awkward with one another but not mad, just weird
>she now has a boyfriend, John, who she started talking to a month before
>i hate that, me and her were dating for a long time but she would always stay away from starting an exclusive relationship with me and she meets this guy and in a month he is her boyfriend
>hate it but am not angry
>carry on with life
>on a friends party i meet the guy, he seems nice but i avoid Layla and him the whole time
>when they are leaving, Layla hugs me and John pats me in the back, as if consolating me
>want to punch him in the face but control myself
>back to isolation
>a few weeks have passed and here i am
>Idk if Layla still goes out with John, dont want to talk about it with her
>we are back at being close friends
>she still is kindo of flirty with me
>on one occasion she almost kissed me but i didnt let her, i take pride from that moment
>i still love her and cant carry on, met this other girl in a party, we made out but didnt go further than that because i had Layla on my mind, and that girl reminded me of her
>back to isolating myself
>welp end i guess
fucking hell, OP. You don't know me but i wish you the best in life. Keep it cool tonight ok?
>>708031588
Back to your cock rate threads, Jose. Andele.
>>708031812
sorry for taking so fucking long, but there it is
>>708016845
Nigga wtf. You used a real chess board? You know there are a shit ton of online chess websites right?
>>708031588
shut the fuck up underage little cunt. I bet your favourite "entertainer" is leafy
>>708016845
That sucks man. When's the last time you talked to her?
rip images over 2mb
http://imgur.com/gallery/lLCtX
>>708032214
it's been years.
>>708031812
Dude you gotta do something about this. She can't keep on treating you like this and expect you to just take it.
The next time she gets flirty, tell her to get serious about you or stop doing it.
Her keeping you on the back burner is not fair to you and it's a shitty way to treat someone.
>>708027669
Real sadboi hours
>>708032000
>>708032126
Having some fun in mama's basement ??
>>708032509
She has kept me on the back burner many times and i let her, this time im not.
Cant really help not being friends with her, we still end up seeing each other in school and with mutual friends so i cant avoid her, but every time she gets too close i just ask her what she is doing and she backs off
>>708032929
Yeah i'm here for the weekend before i deploy.
>>708028710
thanks for the share
Hope you will get newgirl and have more nice trips
>>708032983
Keep doing that I guess. She can't toy around with you like that. Have you ever asked her why she treats you like this?
>>708028974
>feelsbadman.jpg
I'm the dude who's girlfriend of 11 months bailed when he told her about the diagnosis he got.
Someone told me to talk to her, and I did.
Turns out she didn't just dump me for being a burden, but also because she met someone else behind my back.
I am really in the shitter now, I have no idea what to do with myself now.
>Inb4 'kill yourself'
I am not stooping that low.
>>708033147
When we were cool i had no reason to insist on asking her why she treated me like shit, and when we werent cool i would ask her but she didnt like anwsering me so she would avoid it or just say she is sorry but doesnt know, or we wouldnt talk at all
After our most recent discussion before she started going out with John i insisted and she just said she doesnt need to anwser, doesnt want to anwser and asked me to stop
She admited it was very childish, but i dont want to give a shit so i dont bring it up anymore
Thanks for the advices btw
>>708016845
She didn't deserve you, OP. Nobody deserves suicide, but she put you through a lot of pain you kept taking. Don't wonder "what could have been"... Those who say sorry and repeat their actions aren't truly sorry
>>708033563
God thats awful, sorry to hear mate
>>708033085
Appreciate it man.
And ah, idk. Newgirl actually isnt right for me as a person. But id fucking destroy her in bed though, goddamn.
Aye! Many good trips ahead.
>>708033879
It's pretty fucking shitty, I'll find a way to manage however!
Where there is will, there is a way
>>708033563
Fuck her man, she's a bitch and you're better off without her.
The only thing you can do is live life the best you can and not let her bring you down.
>>708033661
Huh sounds like she is kind of messed up. Just keep taking care of you mate, no one deserves to be treated like a backup plan. You're welcome for the advice. I wish someone had given me the same advice so i didn't have to learn the hard way.
>>708034075
Thats true, wish you the best for your life mate
>Girlfriend went to party last night
>Today she told me we need to talk
>I asked about what
>She wouldn't say
>I asked if it was bad
>She wouldn't say
>She said she'd text me tonight
Honestly I'm thinking she cheated or some shit. If you guys keep the feels threads going I'll give you an update.
>>708034119
That was my plan, I'm doing what I can get forward, as I said in
>>708034075
Where the is will, there is way
>>708034242
Thanks Anon, I would blessings you way, but that's pretty gay
>>708034326
Jesus, don't medicine and engrish
I would send blessings*
the girl I love is going to a party to get real drunk for the first time, and I don't even know who else is there
hold me guys
>>708034275
Fuck man that sucks. Hang in there bro
>>708034275
Ugh I hate when girls do that. Can't they just wait to bring the bad news at a time where you are in front of each other?
>>708034326
Good on you mate, keep on keeping on.
>>708034449
Does she know you love her?
>>708034326
>Thanks Anon, I would blessings you way, but that's pretty gay
lol fair enough
Thanks man
>>708017580
that screencap is shit tbh
>>708034479
Right? Or at least text me what the fuck she needs to say and then let me try to figure shit out.
>>708034518
No, I don't have the courage to tell her, and part of me actively doesn't want to
I'm a really stupid person
>>708033062
Did I stutter, you lonely little spic? Shoot yourself in the head with a .22 and die slowly.
>>708016845
You need to post a picture of her, or all of this was for nothing. Let us properly pray for her soul.
>>708034449
holding you my boi, i know the feels
it gun be alright
>>708021202
This one is slam poetry and it's fucking amazing.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vnKZ4pdSU-s
today's story
>yay saturday i love it
>vidya to play and books to read
not so fast anon
>father is home
>he's drunk againg
>he's pissed
>idk why
>he hits me again
>screams and all that
>mom said it's my fault because provoked him
>i'm going into my room
>fuck all this shit, I want a normal family for god's sake
>cut your legs again
it's not so sad and it's also not the first time but i really was in a good mood today
Alright guys, here goes nothing.
>be me
>2007-8ish
>just moved back from colorado after two years, so I haven't connected with my elementary school friends
>8th grade
>be friends with some kid with two moms and a jewnose, let's just call him that
>me and jewnose are pretty close, hangout all the time after school, play vidya, browse interwebs, nerdy kind of stuff
>except I was a psuedo-popular kid because of football
>get some random text one day
>who the fuck is this
>"its ashli"
>this bitch spells her name weird as fuck
>whatever
>tell her to fuck off and die, literally
>she starts crying
I should have known right there she was crazy but she's not that big of a part in the story anyways so whatever
>say sorry and that she's probably really nice and that I'm just not good with people
>she starts being overly nice
>thanking me and shit
>wtf.jpg
>talk for a few days
>tell jewnose about her
>we get pics, shes pretty hot
>tigole bitties for an 8th grader
>jewnose thinks shes hot too
>jewnose gets his own bitch
>stephanie
>shes pretty ugly
>and kind of annoying
>But whatever it's cool
>hangout and play EuroGunz every day because vanilla IJJI gunz sucked in comparison
>talk to ashli all the time
>jewnose talks to her too
>jewnose starts talking shit about me to ashli
>fucking jew
His mom was actually jewish, btw
>so I decide to do him dirty back
>ask stephanie if she'll be my girlfriend
>she barely talks to jewnose anyways, all they do is hold hands and sit by eachother sometimes
>"w-wait.. r-really anon?"
Remember, I'm a psuedojock and she lurks the halls like a ghosr
>yeah! Sure. You're cute
>Executerevengefile.exe
>walking home from school the next day
Cont?
>>708021202
Loved this so much I had to find the source. Fuck man, I don't have OCD but I can understand this level of obsession over a single beautiful creature
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=SHCqv88akDI
>>708034731
I had an ex ruin my entire work day doing that shit.
Sent me a "we gotta talk" text in the morning and then spent her sweet time to come find me hours later. That was the day she became an ex. Basically told my boss not to expect anything out of me that day because I was dead inside.
I hope that whatever she need to talk about is just some stupid shit you two can get easily through.
>>708034773
You're not treating yourself well mate, you gotta take your own emotions seriously and take the risk that your love isn't reciprocated. On the bright side she might like you back.
The only way to know is doing something about it though. If things are gonna go tits up, you'll at least know that you did something about it.
>>708035091
I didn't see someone else had posted before mine, sweet you appreciate this as much as I did though
>>708035137
>>708019445
Post Bethany. I want to see her eyes.
>>708035225
I hope it's some stupid shit man, I really do.
>>708035120
Very sorry to hear anon
Sending you hugs and the gayest kisses and luck
>>708016845
My god OP, almost crying here. Stay strong, man.
>>708035134
Hell yeah
>>708035666
HAIL SATAN, TRIPS OF TRUTH
>>708035134
Fuck yeah, cont.
before this thread dies, someone please bake new bread. currently working on a better screencap than that other shitty one, but it'll take a bit of time
>>708035134
Whatever, cont. anyways
>Walking to stephanies after school one day because I wanted to make jewnose mad
>she lives literally a block away
>"s-so anon.. uh.. How long is it til we should wait for sex.. is two weeks okay"
>WHAT
>mind racing
>virginity yearning for its loss
>absolute D I A M O N D S
>"yeah, t-that's fine.."
>my heart is fucking pounding
>sit at her house and play vidya all day
>Just thinking about sweet sweet sex
>jewnose confronts me
>"wtf man why are you with her? She was mine"
>idk didnt seem like it
>he's salty but he gets over it eventually
>couple more days pass by
>walk over to stephs again
>"anon I don't want to wait. We should have sex today"
>Shiiiiieeet
>get naked
>get on too, missionary obviously because virgin
>no condom
>ohfuckohfuckohfuck
>I back out because I'm a little bitch
>say sorry and run out and go home
>wtf did I just do..
>>708035666
Satan is here
>>708036194
Cont, dont stop
>>708036194
Fucking pussy.
>>708014742
That file name......
>>708020521
The fuck... He didn't touched her eyes.
>>708035064
thanks friend
>>708035225
I tried to think rationally about it, about WHY I love her, this worked before, with other people, other emotions, there was an "artificial" reason for those feelings, and with her I couldn't.
When I think about her with my brain, trying to find an answer, I can't find it, I don't have anything in common with her, we are so different, she and I.
That's the problem, my heart says one thing, my brain says another, I can't decide which one I'll follow, I can't choose between my two parts, they're both important for me to ignore
I don't know what to do, I wish I could just turn off my emotions, this feeling is so hard to deal with
not sure if it constitutes as feelsy but if anyone wants to hear about my first time asking a girl out and getting rejected then i'll tell it
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xJKfm3VcOEQ
>>708035305
Absolutely agreed. I don't have OCD either but that one brings some tears to my eyes whenever I listen to it. It's amazing
>>708029430
HAHAHAHAHA. Gotta love /pol/.
>>708036756
You need to unify your mind and body mate, if you walk around with them being separate entities it's gonna fuck you over. Lemme guess you are prone to anxiety and overthinking things to the point that they become Operatic dramas?
If so, I highly recommend mindfulness meditation. It's a lot easier to sort out your emotions if your body and mind are in balance.
Im just an autistfag, if i told you any of my stories you'd laugh at me but sometimes shit hurts else way...
>>708037058
>>708037505
tell us, that's what the thread is for
>>708035503
thank you really
and actually femanon here so there's no need to be gay
>>708037058
If it gives you feels, it's pertinent to the thread.
wish I felt something positive
or anything different than this
>>708036194
>next day
>go over to stephs house
>100% prepared
>I even bought condoms
>almost the exact same situation
>even in the exact same position
>absolute diamonds again
>except this time I fuck her
>lasted about 20 mins
>was extremely surprised I lasted that long
>apparently so we she
>"hehehe that was really good anon"
>fuck like 3 more times that day
>for the next month we go at it like absolute jack rabbits
>I start even sneaking out at midnight just to go fuck her more
>Don't realize I instantly developed virgin syndrom
>about a couple days after we first had sex we started telling eachother we loved eachother all the time
>eh whatever idc still fucking her
>time goes on, we have a lot of sex, start trying new things in bed, I get my first blowjob from her
>lifeisgood.jpg
>about 6 months in
>it's freshman year of highschool
>everyone knows us together, my popularity has somewhat downgraded since I spend every second of the day at her house
>one day she tells me she's tired and that I should just go home after school
>alright she's just not feeling good
>she does this every day for weeks, but then tells me to sneakout and come over
>whatever, nbd
>She's taking a nap today, but I'm out down the street with some friends
>wait, who is that walking down the street?
>see stephanie walking down the other street to her house
>see her go in, she doesn't notice me, but I notice her
>I go over to her house, call her and ask if she wants to hangout
>"oh sure anon I just woke up come inside"
>something is fuckin up.
>"So you were taking a nap right?"
>"yeah anon, what else would I be doing"
>this fuckin bitch
>all of a sudden her phone vibrates
>on the screen "damn girl can't wait to see you again tomorrow :)"
>my heart drops
>I don't know what to do but I grab the phone
>start looking through the texts with lets call him martin
>see nudes she sent him
>one of them has "I love martin" written on her chest
>she's always refused to send me nudes
>>708033563
Finally finished this, sorry for crap editing, I am on medicine
>>708037795
that is ccold anon :(
good night /b/ros
hope you'll have a good one tomorrow
>>708027669
we love you, brother
>>708037795
oooooooooohhh the playa gets played... what a fuckin cunt tho
>>708016845
Well fuck..
U guys hirin?
>>708038130
Sounds like you dodged a bullet mate.
>>708037412
thanks friend, I'll look into it
I drank today, i'm not an alcoholic though, < 20 times per year, all I wanted today was to cry a little, externalize my feelings a little
All the knowledge I have doesn't help me in this, feelings are something so complex, I never learned how to express/manage them properly
I'm so scared of the future, i think about it so much, I wanted to be right here right now, at least for once.
Sorry to dump this on you, my friends
>>708037584
>>708037645
thanks fam
>be me
>decade or so ago
>14, 8th grade of middle school
>school formal/semi-formal coming up
>last dance of the year and it's only for us 8th graders
>have had a crush on this asian girl who's in most of my classes for a while
>have never had a GF or asked someone out before
>have had crushes on girls in the past, of course, but there was something special about this girl that made me want to ask her to the dance
>after weeks of working up the courage and my friends pushing i decide to ask her on the day of the dance
>ask her after class with my friend and hers watching from the sidelines
>"will you go to the formal with me?"
>"yes!"
>excited af
>"wait, nvm, i promised i'd go with my friends"
>sort of bummed, but at least she would have gone with me
>still going to dance anyway
cont.
>>708037795
>absolute meltdown
>throw her phone at the ground
>bounces up and hits her leg
>start yelling incomprehensibly
>absolutely freaking out
I was never an angry person up until this point, actually quite the opposite, I was shy (or at least that's what i considered it til later but that's a different part of my life, might get to that here, might not)
>leave and slam the door and anything remotely in my path just because I'm that mad
>my whole life is upside down
>something inside of me just switched
>get home and cry myself nearly to sleep until my phone rings
>it's her
>I'm going to ignore it, fuck her
>I answer it almost autonomously, I had no control over my hands
>I don't say anything
>"anon? Hello..? I'm sorry.."
>I start crying harder
>"what do you want stephanie you hurt me enough"
>"I want you. I love you. I'm sorry anon"
>I start to go off on this rant about is he better than me what did I do wrong blah blah blah
Martin was one of my friends btw, he was 22, shes 15, it just added insult to injury
>She denies all of my rant but was honest about seeing him
>said they didnt have sex
>I dont believe her at first but she manages to talk it into me
>I calm down and we start to decide what we're doing
>Of course.. I decide to stay..
>>708038485
There is no problem in dumping that on us, its a feels thread, thats what its meant for
Wish you the best of luck, and I recommend therapy if you dont already do it, can help a lot
Am I 911 now? lol
>>708038485
Start small and work your way up man. The more you express your emotions, the easier it gets.
Another good thing that can come out of this, is that if you start sharing with people in little increment, they'll see this as a sign of trust and feel gratified by it.
Just remember that whatever you are feeling, no matter how alone it makes you feel, someone has felt it before and knows how it is. None of us are unique in these emotions, as they are part of the human condition.
>>708017580
Kill yourself.
I feel like Im not the manliest of men
Im also extremely mediocre looking.
While I do try to improve myself, I find that supplementing my inferiorities is the proper course of action for the time being
To what end, I am not sure.
I suppose that I need to feel like Im not a generally inferior individual.
What do I mean by supplements?
Well.
Although I can barely play notes on my guitar, that has not stopped me from having it strapped to my back everywhere.
I wear mostly western and military regalia
I am not a cowboy
I am not a soldier
I live in New York.
I drink black coffee and make it a point of fact to those around me
Do I prefer that way, yes.
Should it be something I say every day, no.
I generally speak with an air of knowledge in things of a more rugged nature.
I speak of handywork, maintainence, etc.
I know very little on the matters but act as if I hold some deeper knowledge.
Im a damned accountant
Why? Why do I do this?
I believe the most sensible answer is I generally hate myself.
I hate people like me, therefore I hate me
Is my skeleton my uniform? lol
>>708039022
>>708039125
thanks, it's good to be able to open up with someone, talk about this kind of things
you gave me much to think about
thanks for your insight
Is existence work?
Does that make space... DANDY!?
... :D
if anyone wants to talk i'm here, you can add me on skype (fufubomoge)
>>708039257
You need to go on an adventure anon, go become the man you pretend to be. Spend time learning all the things you pretend to know. Get out of the life where you hate yourself and do something to grow the personality you want.
>>708039501
Don't mention it buddy, I've been where you are, so I just see it as helping myself out in the past. Work on this for long enough and you'll be the one recognizing yourself in someone else and handing the advice on.
>>708038776
Alright guys, this is where it starts to get feelsy, bare with me
>I decide to stay, a couple days pass by before we hangout though
>when I do see her, I notice that she has a bruise on her leg from where I threw the phone
>I instantly feel awful, like the biggest piece of shit
>we carry on as we were for about a week
>She gets a new phone
>I start discretely watching her and her texs
>she's still talking to him
>instead of anger, I feel sorrow now
>I feel guilty as if I'm the one who pushed her to this
>I snap myself back and start thinking logically
>I confront her about it
>she gets on the defensive
>says that he's a good friend now and that she's broken it off
>I tell her I don't approve
>she tells me that I'm just a sadistic controlling piece of shit, look at the bruise I left on her
>holy fuck she's right
>"Maybe if you actually let me see him and be happy you wouldn't be such an asshole"
>no dude wtf fuck you, were dating MONOGAMOUSLY
>she tries to hide it for a couple weeks but doesn't do so well
>I see the smile on her face when she texts him
>sometimes she'll bring him up and tell me about how happy she makes her
>I sit there and listen in shock because I can't find the words to say
>one day I bring it up again, she starts saying the same things but gets frustrated and tries to punch me so I grab her arm hard
>apparently I left a bruise this time
>she does the same riot act, how I'm awful and should let her be happy with him
>So I ask if she wants to breakup and be with him
>"No anon.. I love you and want to be with you.. Please don't leave he just makes me happy but you make me happy in other ways"
>I decide to stay
>she starts to talk about him all the time
>she tells me almost daily that Im a piece of shit for not being happy for her
>she tells me that I physically hurt her and that I'm a piece of shit
>she tells all of my friends that I'm a woman beater
>become truly alone
You guys are honestly the best friends I've ever had. We have the same sick sense of humour, we feel shit, even the guys who call everyone pussies in feels threads because its banter. I can get drunk with you dysfunctional retards and feel more at home than anywhere else.
made a better screencap of op's story. letter included. i'm sorry op
I want to know.. if i do push ups while being drunk do i still get gains?
>>708040149
She sounds borderline, was she borderline?
>>708040442
Probably, I can do more push ups when I'm drunk than when I'm sober, and ache like Hell in the morning. So most likely its gotta count for something.
>>708038564
>buy tickets at lunch, go home, get ready, etc.
>parents drop me off at school at like 6 or so
>get there
>not many people there
>eventually cafeteria (where the dance is held) fills up
>see friend
>friend points her out to me
>see her
>she looks beautiful
>after about 10 minutes of contemplating what to do, i say fuck it
>walk up to her and say "you look beautiful"
>"aw, thanks"
>that's that
>she goes back to hanging with her friends
>this sort of thing happens throughout the entire dance
>i'll go up to her, talk to her a bit, she has to go back to her friends
>basically stand at the wall drinking coke for the majority of the rest of the dance since i can't dance for shit
>one her friends and one of my female friends talks to me
>at least i have some company
>she eventually gets girl i like to come over and talk to me
>nervous as shit
>crush walks up to me, female friend goes to dance and leaves us alone
>akwardsilence.7z
>eventually get the balls to say "kamerin, i really like you
>"i like girls"
>shocked
>i knew that she wouldn't return the feeling but i didn't expect this
>didn't expect her to be so blunt about it
>one of her friends comes up to us
>specifically crush
>crush's friend is touching crush and stuff
>not sexually, but not a way normal friends would
>crush has been hanging with this friend throughout the entire dance
>hits me like a ton of bricks that they're probably fucking in love
>crush asks if she can leave
>"yea, sure"
>fall to ground
>my friend walks over
>sits next to me
>talk all about it while some song plays
>don't remember name or even tune of song unfortunately, but remember it was sad at the time
And that's the first time I confessed my feelings to a girl. Honestly, I think it made me a better person. I was still a bit nervous about talking to girls after that of course, but I think ultimately it gave me more self confidence.
Dear god, you fuckers suck at telling stories.
>>708040720
So post yours and show us how its done. Everyone has a story to tell, what's yours anon?
>>708040718
That sucks man, but at least you did something about it.
I'll turn into an alcoholic the moment I start living alone
I'm so weak
>>708037505
>>708037584
Ok, here goes the "How i realised i was very stupid (and still am)" one
>Be me
>15
>Not a beta fag but also not alpha, just normie kisless friend of my friends
>Winter break
>Be in a bar back in my hometown talking with some friends taking some soda just passing time
>I live in the nearest city from my town but its still far af so i go there for holidays
> Talking to femanon "so i've never even kissed no one yet"
>She answers "reeeeally" and i was like "yup whatever"
>I didnt really give a fuck about it but the conversation went like this idk
>So she tells me she has a friend who's looking for a boyfriend and i go like "yea sure tell her we can meet and see if something happens"
>2nd january of that year, i have a date, in fact it was a blind date, because i didn't even know who she was
>She's really cute, same age (15) and has a really kawaii voice a can't forget nowadays
>We talk and shit and she throws me a lot of hints about kissing and shit
>Mfw being so nervous can't even hide an erection for just talking to a girl in this romantic way
>We go home and this mutual friend tells me via messages everything the girl told her to me "she wanted you to kiss her and so..."
>I was like i just met her and this is going too fast for me i need to chill
>Mfw realised the same night i wasn't coming back to hometown in 1.5 months
>Coming back after 40+days without seing her
>Pretend nothing happens
>Meet up with her and kiss her (my first kiss) just right there before knowing she got a boyfriend in theese 40+ days without being in touch at all with me
>And then i realise how really stupid i could be (and still am)
Now i just remember this and laugh a lot but it got my feels crushed (did i mention i was stupid back then)
>>708040887
Its probably pretty shitty if hes here telling us we suck.
>>708040720
Go on then, memory shaman, hit us with your most gigantic tale.
why? what happened to you anon?
>>708039257
this tends to not work well friend. I've found people can usually detect it, especially women.
>>708029855
checked
>>708040149
>time goes on
>she does this all the time
>except now it's more than just him
>at least I'm still getting laid right...?
>I become a social pariah at school
>everyone hates me because they think I beat my girlfriend
>Time goes on, she tells me she's pregnant
>my life is fucking over
>I don't know what to do
>she leaves me
>now I have nothing.. not even my girlfriend
>she gets an abortion
>tells everyone at school that I left her when I found out, and then forced her to get an abortion
>I'm so hated at school that it gets to the staff, and I get called into the deans office and asked if I actually forced her to
>I tell them no, that never happened, she broke up with me and I haven't talked to her
>they believe me, thank god
>time goes on and she just kinda wanders back into my life
>she says she wants to be with me and that I'll be the only one
>I decide to get back with her because she was the only thing at the time that was going to stop me from killing myself
>I start sharing my feelings with her
>she consoles me at first, but as time goes on she starts telling me that maybe I should kill myself
>I finally decide to stand up for myself amd leave
>Im finally free
>life is starting to look up
>everything is good
>I found a new girl, new friends
>my old reputation is disappearing
>but one day her mom leaves for two weeks
>hosts almost a two week long party
>its my first time ever getting drunk
>we fuck every single night and sleep together
>and as quickly as it came we start dating again
>she starts telling me the same things over and over
>she starts saying that she's depressed and it's my fault
>I honestly believe her
>I hurt her didn't I?
>Maybe if I had just let her do what she wants I wouldn't be like this
>I wouldn't feel this way and she wouldn't say these things
>maybe she's right
>I don't know what it feels like to trust someone anymore
>I can't trust her
>I can't trust my friends
>but the other week felt great
>I didn't feel anything at all
>>708040149
still waiting for you, do take your time....
why do I love someone that I should almost hate?
It doesn't make sense.
Fucking heart don't think
>>708031812
cool
>>708041688
i feel u anon
>>708041688
and worse, all my soda is gone, how i am going to drink my vodka now? my stomach is weak
I want to cry
>>708041867
(u dn't fl nethng)
>>708041527
>I never want to lose that feeling again
>So I didn't.
>I started drinking every day
>Hangout with people that drank every day
>my life completely revolved around alcohol
>I would get blackout drunk by 6pm on schoolnights
>but at least I'm free now
>I don't have to deal with her anymore
>stephanie slowly fades away into being just a bad memory
>I would be happy sometimes
>depressed other times
>drunk, all the time.
>I partied all day every day
>it was the golden age of my life
>and I didn't want to miss out by not partying
>eventually I would meet girls and have flings
>but then one came along
>lets call her mariah
>she was great
>she'd take care of me when i was drunk, so she had to be a keeper
>as time went on the relationship grew sour and I started fucking this other girl more than I fucked her
>I would get in trouble with the police on a near dailt basis but it just didn't matter
>I still had alcohol
>mariah was always around for the parties but I'd always take off and do my own thing
>but it was cool
>I was fine
>people started to say stupid shit like "dude you have a problem "
>what the fuck did they know? Not my fault you can't hold your liquor
>things would get kinda bad sometimes
>Id wake up in strange places with different clothes and people I've never met
>but I always found my way home so it wasn't too bad
>my probation officer started to get fed up with the constant police contact
>but again what the hell does she know right?
>>708042043
u dnt know meh
>TFW 18 and still kissless, handholdless, and virgin
>>708042792
Relax dude, I lost my virgnity at 18 and it wasn't really a big deal. Just get out there and meet people and it is bound to happen.
>>708042155
lol, I don't.
I'd anyone.
>>708042136
>couple years pass by
>still on papers, no jail time though so i cant be that bad
>so i go to a party like usual every friday night
>some douchebag is here talking shit about me fucking his girlfriend or whatever
>shut up roodypoo, no one cares
>night goes on, the drinks flow well, its a good time
>Annnnnd
>blackout.jpg
>What. The. Fuck
>Where the fuck am I?
>Is this a fucking hospital?
>Why can't I move
>fuck it hurts to move
>I hear crying
>mom? Is that you?
> I look over and I see my mother in tears
>"Anon.. look at you.. what are you doing to yourself anon"
>fuck is she talking about
>I see police officers standing outside
>A nurse comes in
>"How are you feeling?"
>pretty damn hungover and kinda sore. Can I ask whats going on?
>She shows me my face in the mirror
>I can't even recognize myself
>My jaw is broke, both of my eye sockets are broken, my nose is broken, I'm bleeding out of places I didnt even think possible
>"A police officer found you in the middle of the street unconscious last night. You had alcohol poisoning and you were beaten to a pulp, you're lucky to be alove, amd surprisingly, you don't have brain damage"
>my whole world falls away for a second
>I can't remember anything.. What could have happened to me..
>Apparently none of my friends know anything about what happened
>apparently after I woke up I went into a rage, they had to tie me down because a sedative would have killed me
>My mom begs me to stop what I'm doing
>and you'd think after something like that I would
>Nope. I didn't.
>>708043025
know
>>708040887
These stories run in circles and pray for self pity. You think they will 'walk the dinosaur' becausae of the drag, but they don't, that's how boring they are.
A story of mine, not really special but get on my nerves every time.
> join an NGO
> amazing group of loving people, plenty of hotties too
> start talking to a cute girl that was also volunteering
> two weeks later i ask her out
> she agrees
> get laid that night
> 2 months dating and banging
> one day she says she's having hard times and ask me over at 1 AM on a wednesday
> 'oh shit nigga gotta work in a few hours'
> go anyway
> 3 days later she says i have to make a bigger effort to conquer her (the fuck nigga)
> stop answering my texts
> stop texting her for 2 days
> the day after theres a NGO hang out, beers, weed and music.
> noone knows we are dating
> she shows up with one of my friends
> hugging, flirting, being all over each other
> i'm boiling inside
> we are 8 guys and girls sitting in a circle chatting and being stoned/drunk, while she and my friend are in a corner giggling.
what do you do here guys? The two people i told about this said they would chimp out.
>>708043130
Fuck her best friend dude dont gratify her skanky behavior by letting it make you mad
>>708043130
kek
you deserve it chad
>>708043382
she doesn't have friends, that is one of the reasons i think she is just a piece of shit.
maybe her sister but she is way too young and a a saint
>>708043552
chad?
i got in a bus for one hour on a wednesday at 1 am because one of her teachers yelled at her
I like being an undead. It's fun.
>>708043743
> two weeks later i ask her out
> she agrees
> get laid that night
> 2 months dating and banging
>not chad
You'll get used to the smell. If there's such a thing.
>>708043839
she made all of the effort tbqh
i just didnt want to tag her as a skank so easily because feminism equality and all that
You know, like... chocolate milk?
Mmm, and... chocolate covered strawberries. That's hot~.
>>708043061
shit continue anon
> *thhhjbbbjhb~*
>>708044380
Right? Wtf
I'm having teenager tier existential crisis etc.
Slowly growing distance with high school friends, they are making new friends and shit, the whatsapp group created on the last year of HS it's RIP. A matter of time I guess.
I'm incapable of making friends for some reason. I don't feel good around people, I don't feel good alone.
I feel like shit lately and I feel even worse when I want to talk about feeling like shit with someone and realize I have no one to do so.
I want someone who really understands me. Someone who connects with me. I'm not talking about a girlfriend, it could be totally be a dude, I don't care. Just someone I would be comfortable talking to, someone who would just sit at the beach with me to watch the sundown without saying a word.
Blaaahh~.
>>708035064
JUST FOUND OUT THERE'S 40 PEOPLE THERE
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH
>>708044710
I was and still am in the same situation when I first went to highschool...now I barely have one old friend that I can talk to
>>708045032
Decreased by-- man, what's taking so long?
>>708045165
sorry, i'm drunk
what do you mean?
>this thread
>>708014742
Holy shit every fucking day. Why
>>708045258
You know what remote neural monitoring technology is?
If not, I understand and you have my sincerest apologies. =]
>>708045533
nice try, that doesn't exist
>>708045324
Change your behavior today and open up to one of the people who care.
>>708043130
no one answered what to do here.
>>708045656
Lol, neither does nanotechnology.
I bow to you, anon, good person of the maybe lands~. x]
>>708045765
She made her own bed. Just cut her off from any intimacy and be a better person than her.
>>708045765
you got to let that shit go chad, fuck that bitch
Guys how do let a girl you've never spoken to know you like her subtley without soundy too needy and like a faggot
>inb4 underage
>>708034449
I actually feel for you man, know what it's like
>>708045871
Yeah, what this person said! :D
>>708045914
How do you know you like her if you've never spoken together?
>>708045933
"Veins." Or is it vains? Veins, vains? Meh.
>>708045866
yeah this is it i think, i have a big ego and it hurts to let go sometimes.
>>708045871
>>708046013
thank you guys.
>>708045914
anon, talk to her first, then ask. dont just go by looks
>>708046145
> mmM?
stop by if you are looking for someone to talk to tonight
https://discord.gg/8PTWJ
>>708046145
im desperate at this point and to tell you the truth i've never really spoken to girls before
>>708046309
No, go by looks THEN talk! :D
>>708046309
how do i do that though without being a faggot. I'm scared ill be like this all my life
>>708044710
hey. it's happening here too.
my friends are slowly growing apart, it's a shame because our meme squad goes to university in the same area, all of us.
one is now a frat, super popular (he was popular before but now he's a butterfly in comparison)
another is talking to my frat friend, but still off in his own little group.
the last, is my best friend i've ever had, my bro. (despite being differently colored).
it just really, really, really hurts when he gives me the cold shoulder. i try and do whatever it takes to get him to talk to me, but he just seems so distant and i can't reach him. i let him borrow my ps4 (because his broke before destiny RoI came out and i knew how important it was to him), i offer to hang out with him. we used to play lots of video games, now naught. i don't know if he thinks that he's elitist and better than me and just doesn't want to subject himself to shit-tier play, or just doesn't like me anymore. i really do try and not a moment escapes me without me wondering about what he's doing, if he's okay. the people around me i barely mesh with, there's one anon who's pretty cool he looks fashionable and plays video games, anime, etc, etc. but no one here just feels like my old friends do. no one does; not even my old friends. i hate myself for not being something more, for being pathetic.
i hate myself for thinking about it all the time, i can't help it. i just want to know if he's okay.
you know who you are, if you're reading this.
i get so scared when i talk to him because i don't know if i might say something and put him off.
why did it all have to go away. it was all bish-bash-bosh we were hanging out so much and playing vidya having a gay ol' time (not like that), i hate it that i'm still attached to him.
i fucking love him like a brother, i make it clear to him, i even wanted to do a blood-brother thing like in the movies.
i'm here for you anon. we're all here for you.
>>708010127
fuck u
Im putting time and effort into my website and its going nowhere..the eorst part is a few years ago i was getting more and more hits every day and my life fell to shit...i dont know what to do
>>708046376
Hmm, you need to take some steps before jumping into a relationship then. You need to normalize yourself around women. They're people too.
If you have a hobby that people tend to meet each other in groups to participate in, go to one of those groups.
If you're a super anxious guy, I'll recommend mindfulness meditation like I've done earlier in the thread.
It's really hard to be in love with a person you don't know, so I would posit that you are more in love with the notion of being in love, than actually in love with the girl of your desires.
>>708034449
Then go to the party and grab her by the pussy,that`s the only way ;)
maurice
i fucked up big time. i love you and miss you so much. not a day goes by that i dont think about you. i want to write to you but im afraid youve moved on and dont want to mess with your new life, but if you see this and feel the same, please message me. you know how to reach me.
>>708046582
Love your hair~. Mm, work it~.
>>708046956
it's so easy for you to say
if i had the courage/means to do this, I wouldn't have to do it in the first place
>>708016845
At least you can say it's how she'd have wanted to go.
>>708046956
Yeah! Like you keep doing to me. =]
Bros smoke a cone or two the read this stuff. Really put it in perspective for me
