Lets have one of those threads
>age
>how many women have you fucked so far
>some crazy shit you have done or seen that will never forget tldr version
>22
>1
>I almost fucked a purebred mare
>>707883785
>19
>technically 0, was drunk at the time and couldn't get my dick hard enough to get farther than the tip inside.
>put my finger in my ass once when i was 13 because i was curious how it felt.
>>707883785
>age: 20
>Women: 3 (though 2 of them were only one time fuck sessions and the third was barely even a minute since she stopped it)
>Crazy shit: Coworker I was friends with fell from a scaffolding and I saw his dead body in a corner in a pool of his own blood wheezing.
>>707883785
29
10(ish)
I ran someone over for giving me a phony $100 bill when I used to sell blow
1. Age 23
2. Current gf of 7 years. Prior to her my first sexual experience was in a restroom at Malta. Got my dicked sucked. The slut couldn't take more than just my head though. Was drunk as fuck. Went back the day later for a 2:nd BJ. Never came.
3. Jerked off into a female co-workers Aole Vera drink. Watch her as she drank it all. Experienced a palpitation for a few sec afterwards. The kick was real.
>22
>3
The craziest thing is undecided for me. Let me just do a tl;dr of the two that aren't tie breakers
>when I was 19 I lost my virginity because a friend called me saying he met a girl at a park that wants 3 way and he wanted me to lose my virginity
>I fuck this girl with my friend for a month only to find out she was 15
and next is
>last year I went to Europe and fucked a first cousin
>but we got feelings for each other and she's pregnant and she's moving to America to live with me by February
What's worse?
>>707885664
The pregnant cousin is worse, because that actually has lasting consequences.
The chick in the park actually isn't that uncommon. In HS, some friends and I would regularly gangbang a 14yo (legal here -- we were all 17-18 at the time) who had a 3yo daughter.
>>707886062
What the fuck, where do you live, New Zealand?
And I suppose the cousin one is the craziest. But I'm happy to be a father and I'm in good hopes that I will have a good future.
>>707886278
Good on you, for stepping up as a father.
And no -- Canada, about an hour outside of Toronto.
>>707883785
>28
>11
>had my friend (who is a dude, obvi) fuck me in the ass while my girlfriend gave me head once. Also we both pissed on her once after having an extremely drunken threesome in a hotel room in Manhattan.
>>707883785
Tell us about how you almost fucked the horse?
>>707887150
>>707886630
Damn man, a 14 year old having a 3 year old daughter and wants to get gang banged. It sounds like the good ol' Greek times.
>>707887294
Awesome statue
>>707883785
30
10 (4 ltr)
saw a dude get shot in the head point blank at a street race in oakland
>21
>36
>had first three some at 14, second at 16
Must of peaked, because I haven't been with two girls at once ever since
>>707887406
Greek times? This chick could play the double-aulos like a pro!
>>707883785
27
0
When I was 18, I left my house and walked naked around my neighborhood, at about 3am.
25
8
kidnapped a train (no kidding)
17
1
Have seen someone get head stomped in at the age of 11 and have been pulled over in a car homecoming night with 3 individuals who were under the influence of thc and alcohol. We had about 4gs in the trunk along with drug parafanelia inside the car. The cop new exactly what was up, but for some reason let us go.
20
4
Had a threesome with my first gf and her best friend when we were 17. Still best sex I've ever had.
>age: 18
>body count: 14
>saw a dude fuck a dead cat; cat died during intercourse.
>>707883785
20
0
Threatened a teacher with a knife. I was 8
>>707883785
>19
>4
>Saw my friend kill himself right in front of me
>>707888077
Underage b& pls leave.
>>707883785
29.
About 100.
Seen a guy get his head caved in with a clawhammer when on a cocktail of drugs at an illegal warehouse rave. I basically saved his life since I was the only guy that noticed and managed to get him to a hospital via stopping the rave and notifying the DJ and anyone who would listen to me.
Fucked a girl outside her boyfriends bedroom window on a main road for so long that the sun came up and people were walking their dogs and people were driving by beeping. Her boyfriend obviously found out and kicked her out the next day.
Had a police helicopter chase me for petrol bombing random shit with stolen illegal pink diesel on 2 occasions. Got away both times.
I've seen and done a lot of shit but those are what come to mind right now.
>23
>9
>first was my qt, ex now, my first love, break up in april, all this shit happened after, i don't know what the fuck my life is now
>2 chink streetwalkers
>5 black girls
>1 chubby 17 years old french girl
>got a blowjob from a sandnegro girl with the rag still on
>craziest shit: barebacked a tranny in the woods at 4 am, got my car broke into.
>got my cock sucked from a little twink fag in my car, was working uber, he bought us mcdonalds after, spent 1 and a half hour in total, 3.0x surge, which converted to burgerdollars would be 82 cents per minute.
>saw a bunch of arabs stab a negro in the tram ( living in paris )
>>707889715
>Things that never happened for 200, Alex.
>>707889324
how he do
>>707888061
Tell me more
>>707890122
Blew his brains out with a 12 gauge.
Happened when I was 15. Fucked me up, still does around the anniversary.
>>707883785
>22
>12ish
>fucked my cousin in a residential buildings staircase at like 6pm
>>707883785
>18
>1
>DDOS'd my school which happened to redirect to what was Northern California's School District Provider and knocked off a thire of the state's schools, from what I was told. Said I was going to kill myself and they dropped everything against me.
>>707888061
For real how did this happen
>>707890709
>DDOS
You must be such a cool hacker anon, are you a part of anonymous?
:^)
>>707883785
>31
>Probably triple digits
>Thai hookers are still the best at everything
Best non-hooker experience
>Dated a 44yo tiny hot milf for about 3 months. She loved swinging, my foot fetish, and being dominant... Also had a fascination with trannies. Would suck tranny cock again to find her.
>>707890948
I actually tell everyone they could've done it.
Now I'm just known as the kid who turned off the Wi-Fi.
>26
>10
>3somes, two times, and fingered a colleague at work under the table while others were sitting in front.
>>707883785
22
8
overdoses and bloody fights.
>>707883785
30
1
your mum's asshole
>28
>4F & 4M
>4th grade. Have big project I simply find stupid. Be good student, not a problem. Also have crack baby retard constant problem in class. Known for stealing stuff, causing problems in general. He actually did this project (did a good job too). Stole his, put my name on it. He protested to the teacher got called a liar.
>Not long after he goes to kid jail for fucking his little sister. Never gets out.
>>707890004
I don't have to prove anything to you, I have absolutely no reason to lie, even on an anonymous image board.
OP asked for stories and tales, I gave them.
The guy that taught me how to juggle was Britain's worst sex trafficker.
He had a whole TV show made about him.
Again, no lie at all. You don't have to believe me.
24
0
alcoholism
>>707883785
>28
>2
>Nearly let someone die, just to hide the fact that we were smoking hash. Its k he lived.
>>707891544
>Taking the bait
Wut r u doin m8
>26
>2
>One of the girls that I fucked it's my cousin
>>707886630
For clarification; the legal age of consent is 16 and if younger within 5 years or your age
>>707883785
30
20-ish
Crazy?
>Ran some one over in a parking lot for not getting out of the way. Drove off
>felt good at first... never went away though
>>707891775
am I the only one here who didn't fuck his own cousin?
>age
24
>how many women have you fucked so far
4
>some crazy shit you have done or seen that will never forget tldr version
Shat myself infront of ex's friends whilst wearing shorts, it splatted on my calf
Lots of attempted overdoses
Lots of breakdowns
>19
>0
Nothing too fucked up, but:
>in Portugal on holiday
>walking along highway to club
>woman on a moped pulls out of a side street
>t-boned by someone speeding down the main road
>car more or less obliterates her leg
>give first-aid with locals until ambulance comes
>almost certainly lost the leg
20
9
Watched a nigger get beaten and stabbed to death. Good experience.
>19( almost 20)
> 3
>Saw gypsies murder each other with knifes and axes, meanwhile me and my friend was betting who would win
> A dude suicided: threw himslef in front of the train, i was walking my dog and found him. ( the train driver did't even notice him) called the ambulance, helped them to collect skullbone pieces....
A lot more if interested
Age 18, girls 5, fucked one of them in the girls bathroom at school, current gf 15 yo
>>707883785
>>33 y.o.
>>17 grills
>>Was with my ex for 6 years and for one of our anniversary she planned this whole romantic stay at the Queen Mary. Shes all into the whole spooky movies and haunted places shit. Anyways, after dinner and the scary tour they give you into the engine room she was getting frisky and we went bank into our room. While I was fucking her brains out; aside from the room being erie weird shit started happening. Faucet turned on, weird breeze was coming from the corner of the room and weird knocking sound from the side of the boat.
There was more but tldr
>>707890253
details
>>707883785
>33
>dunno. Over 50, probably less than 100. I'd estimate 80% were hookers, though.
>Once kicked a donkey in the head
>>707892016
No, I haven't. Granted I had a chance, at Mt sister's wedding of all places. But I was a porky fucker at the time and passed cause the fat hide some of my dick. And I'm all about the show.
It's a shame too, she was my type. Scene, petite, had daddy issues.
>28
>1
>a girl decided to peg me. i fucked her first. i asked another girl if they have toys she said no i call up my boyfriend/ go to the bar.
>15
>15 girls (i like the chase with sluts)
(Im rather good looking, and im a fuckboy lol)
>nothing too special
>seen 3 people getting stabbed by muslim gang
>seen a major drugdeal across the street
>>707883785
https://discord.gg/xfh4EWj
Official Raid Server !
Over 500 active raid members
We're going raiding again in 5 hours
>lel-chan
>>707892304
moar. do it.
>>707883785
Before you even think about it
>>707883785
>23
>with Prostitutes prob10 or more, Without 4
>loosing my virginity to a prostitute when i was 19 cuz i couldn't wait anymore.
pretty tame here
>27
>5
>had a foursome with another couple from work but only for 8 mins, then we all started laughing
>> 27
>>15 this year alone, 60+ total
>> Had a 3some with two emo roommates I met on tinder. Got head from twins at the same party separately without either of them finding out. Made a sub girl drink a full glass of my piss while on her knees...then she ate out my ass before I fucked her ass hard...good times.
>>707892692
lol why laughing? was it awkward?
>>707892341
His parents had recently gotten divorced and he already had crippling depression. His dad liked to hunt/had guns. I guess the divorce out him over the ledge, went over to his house to play some halo 3 and I walked in on him pulling the trigger. On his birthday. We were born a day apart and knew each other since we were three. It killed me that my best friend would do that shit, makes birthdays a little bittersweet.
>>707883785
>22
>1
>accidentally killed a kid from my school at the age of 13. Nobody has ever discovered it was me.
>>707891757
I'm a fish mate, it's my perogative.
31
about 30
no real crazy shit i can think of it all seems very hum drum at this point
>>707892842
wth how? and why
>>707892842
Until you posted it here and they trace your IP.
>>707892344
why kick the donkey kek
>>707892182
do tell
>>707892798
we were in a hotel room drinking tons of champagne and decided to move our flights back to the next day and only realised that after we started fucking, incredibly stupid laughter for no reason
>>707883785
>30
>Around 30
>Dated a girl with major daddy issues who liked to pretend to be anywhere from 8 to 13. She also liked me to piss in her mouth.
>>707892921
>>707892930
Kid bullied me. So one day I had enough and when he was alone I pushed him. The stairs were just next to him. He fell down the stairs and the hit his head badly. Wasn't my intention tho. I was just mad. But nobody saw me pushing him.
22
5 (might be 6, but absinthe blurs shit out)
Took a shit down the air-vent of my old school day before school started, causing a few rooms to be locked off for a week. Not exactly my craziest action/memory, but can't think of shit right now..
>>707892826
fuck man, sorry to hear that.
how long ago?
>>707893481
lol what the fuck you win pal you jsut admited to have killed a guy and got away with it lmao
>>707893048
Well, a few years back, I was staying up at my mom's house in the country while my place was being renovated.
I would go on long walks, because there's not much to do out there, and there was this one farm I'd walk by every day that had this donkey that just plain didn't like me for some reason. Whenever I'd walk by, it'd hiss and charge the fence and shit.
Anyway, one day I'm walking by, and this fucking thing managed to half jump-half scramble over the fence and comes right at me. Now, I'm thinking I'm fucked, because I'm not gonna outrun a fucking donkey, but I did do Muay Thai for years and I kick fucking hard, so I figured might as well give it a go, maybe at least hurt the thing enough to make it think attacking me was a bad idea.
So I kicked the thing right square in the jaw, and it kind of stumbled a bit, hurt like fuck, it was like kicking a rock, but the fucker backed off, and I took off running as fast as I could. Dunno what happened to the donkey, but it wasn't there anymore after that day.
>>707890253
Sorry to hear about that bro, sounds totally fucked up
>21
>10
>Left gf in woods lost and alone 5 miles from civilization, no food no water, never reported missing never heard from her again. Probably got more lost I hope.
>BEST WAY TO BREAK UP. Period
>Impregnated girl without her knowing, she was passed out drunk. Will never find out it was me, she alread has had it
>feels good man
27
22w + 3m
Have had threesomes with my wife with both men and one woman. Also sucked lots of cock, cum in a guys ass bareback as he came, fucked in public and got caught by a park ranger(though he didn't care and drove right past), been with a couple squirters including one that shot like 8+ft, and some other shit.
>>707893770
>because I'm not gonna outrun a fucking donkey
Put this on my grave stone, I want people to ask questions.
>>707893697
>>707893971
4 years. Spent two being an absolute wreck, dropped outta high school. Burned all my bridges in anger. Finally am getting around to rebuilding the life I had. Shits hard, but I take it day by day.
Never realized how hard networking in a town where everyone doesn't like you is.
>>707894172
maybe move to a new one?
>25
>1 women older than me was 21 she was 29
> lost my virginity with first gf 4 years ago
> planing to get anew gf
>>707883785
>34
>50 +(Cant remenber exact total)
>Choke girls,cut them, beating and urinate on them(Consensual)
>>707883785
>31
>35
>Lost my virginity in a tool shed at 15 to a 15 year old who is now my ex-stepmother.
>28
>2
>Will never forget my latest ex who was into anal and enjoyed letting me give her rimjobs
>22
>5
>Lost my virginity at 18 to my ex girlfriends mom while we were dating. (She was 34) The sex continued for 2 months until her husband become suspicious. Can share more in /b is interested
>>707894502
Groddy
>>707883785
https://discord.gg/xfh4EWj
>RAIDS IN 5 HOURs
>JOIN
>We'rE
>RRAADAIIDIDAIDDINGINGGGG
>>707894768
Also, the third woman I slept with was when I was 19, she was my cousin but hot af (she was 23).
>>707894768
Tell us faggot
>>707894716
Current gf prefers anal, which makes her the best gf.
>>707895058
>Me 18, virgin
>GF at the time was 16 but really boring. She would fall asleep at like 8 when I came over to visit.
>First time something started was in the lounge, we made a big place to sit on the floor with pillows. GF was next to me, I was lying down in the middle and her mom came in and asked if she could sit.
>I said sure and she sat next to me
>10 mins into the movie, gf asleep, the mom and my hand touched
>Started holding hands while she rubbed my hand with her thumb
>I looked at her smiling and she smiled back
>Her husband was often away on business trips and away at the time
>She asked me if we wanted to go into the other room.
Shall I cont? (Also her husband was rich af and she had implants
>>707894502
russian/10
>>707892483
Ok Amigo, I can't prove anything but what I will say that there is pictures taken and they're in my old laptop and old laptop is shit.
During the tour
>Inside the closed pool
>everything dark
>taking pictures with flash on
>just me gf and tour guide lady
>seeing shadows
>when we see picture no shadow
>just orbs
>orbs everywhere
After the pool you get the option of going into the showers which is much spookier
>just me and gf
>tour lady had a bad experience and says fuck that
>says something about a little girl
>gf has camera and tells to walk to the very end of showers
>I'm a guy so can't be scared
>but in reality shitting bricks
>half way down the shower i heard little kids in front of me which is dark
>i tell gf to start taking pictures
>still walking forward but scared
>i see my shadow from flashes
>hairs standing on end
>turn around and speed walk the fuck out of there
>i asked gf to never show me the picture of the shower
>She says that she had to deleted them because of what she saw
>That whole night she wanted to tell me but told her that i don't want to know
There's more, interested?
>>707894841
Yeh, I was pretty disgusted, too.
>>707895433
NY/10
>>707895132
Yeah, maybe I will forget my latest ex when I find a gf who happens to like or prefer anal.
My first gf did not like it. I brought it up and she just said no. Also, I once just tried hotdogging with her and she jumped, that's how much of a prude she was.
Btw I'm pretty inexperienced for my advanced age cause autist. I swear if I were a bit worse-looking, I'd soon enough become wizard for sure.
>20
>0
>I like to shoot the legs out on wild animals and play with the struggling bodies, I dunno, death and suffering interest me.
>>707894064
My fellow bi heathen.
17
0 girls fucked not even kissed mega virginfag here
Craziest thing done was broke into a building with a friend did parkour in and around it, middle of night pretty fun
>>707895685
yea, thats why your at 0 faggot
>>707895745
You're not wrong
>>707895397
Cunt. Please
1. Age 21
2. Fucked 2 girls, messed around with 6 others.
3. Got caught having sex with exgf by a cop once. Cop must've been a 40 year old virgin because he was super uncomfortable and just told us to get going.
>>707895603
It's great - was an anal virgin when we met, and I've slowly been working her up to being anal only. Feels good, man. Good luck in your search.
25 year old
42 women
I don't have any cool stories, most of them are pretty fat or ugly. I am a self-deprecating alcoholic that sticks his penis in everything then hates himself for it later
>>707895397
>>707895909
Cont.
Going to keep this short as I have to go fairly soon
>We go into the other room
>I tell her I have always thought of her in a naughty way
>She admits she has thought about it as well
>Small talk
>Tells me to take off my pants
>Starts to give me a handjob.
>Mind exploding at this point,
>She starts to give head. Holy fucking shit what is going on
>Within 2 minutes I feel the cum about to explode.
>I say "I'm going to cum"
>She thought I said "Insert name for gf" is coming
>The mom jumps up and runs out the room to the other bedroom
>I spray my cum all over myself.
>Mom comes back in 2 minutes and asked what happened
>fml
>She says don't worry, we will be alone again sometime soon
It was 2 days later when my gf went to school that I went over and had sex with the mom.
Can cont that story if requested...
>>707895564
your gay
>>>>707890198
>>707890712
Were drinking with me and few buddies. Around 7am sunday morning, drunk as fuck. Come to this village train station and there is whole train. EMPTY!!! the conductor was somewhere having breakfast or coffee... idk... we just walked inside. it wasnt locked or anything. I watched documentary like a week ago abou trains so i knew how to start that shit and drove like one kilometer with it before we stoped it wth emergency break and escaped. Picture related.
>>707896325
Why ask if you need to continue
>>707892182
aye. greentext story pls
>>707896535
Because dono if anyone even gives a shit
22
Low 40's
>18
>0
>almost killed myself. was "saved." fuck this gay shit.
>>707896649
So continue please
Wanna read all you can before you have to go
AGE 25
girls fucked: between 15-18 can't remeber them all
Once I got raped by female bartender, but I liked it so I didn't consider it a rape literally.
32yo
6, but 3 of them were/are gfs.
>>707883785
age
>36
fuck count
>who the fuck knows
crazy shit:
>choking women till they turn purple
>bi gangbangs, gloryholes, etc
>drugging/unconscious fucking (consensual, though)
>lots of things where I take control, and basically turn the woman into a slut
>>707895553
Fuck Yea!
I remember an episode of Gene Simmons Family Jewels (real. quality. television) where Gene and Shannon spent a night onboard. It was spooking as F even for The Demon himself.
Your possible ghost story is better than all these virgins bragging about their imaginary fucks.
19
0
Rose from the dead one time.
>>707896378
holy shit.
>>707896779
you will never be president now
>>707885216
Faggot
>>707896779
rape? tell us more.
>>707883785
23
0
i did a lot fucked up shit as a kid that bothers me everyday. im pretty much a hardcore loner forever. but at least im not suicidal
>>707893481
I though you got sent to Rikers, became homies with Freddy and his crew and became a drug addict. Also, I thought the kid survived
>>707889715
what a load of bullshit hahaha
>>707886278
Naw cousin thin is really common tbh lots ff peopee do it many just dont talk about it, my bro has two really smart kids with his cousin granted hes divorcin her but it was good while it lasted
>>707888077
Wow mad lad at the second one thc AND alcohol?! Jesus Christ...
>>707897300
>hardcore loner
Explain this edge.
>>707893770
9/10 bc running away after
>19
>1
>be 17
>true kvlt black metal
>tried to put fire in a church
>failed miserably
>got in jail
>after 2 days i was free cause you can do everything being underage faggot in Brazil
>attempted to put fire in the same church again
>worked this time
>cops beat the shit out of me
>they throw me in jail for real just for lulz
>get spanked again by the prisoners, they were all christians
>after 5 days im free again
>5 more churches and 1 school were burned down cause of me
>I started a riot in my city
>mfw
>>707888995
So the cat was dead then he fucked it until he died again? Or you just wrote it like that so you could use a semicolon?
>>707897654
when and where u did it, anon
>>707897480
I did some things that normal kids wouldnt do growing up. Lets just put it that way. Pretty much caused extreme panic attacks at age 8. I am a lot better now, but I tend to avoid people at all costs. I have a great job with great pay but if people knew how I used to be, it would change their perception of me
>>707896986
I was helping in animal shelter and I provide animal adoptions as well, so I was found by this chick on the internet, I provide her a dog and after some time I went to her city to check up on the dog, then she take me to the bar, we got drunk as fuck and she took me to her place, I was barely concious so I went straight to bed, there were some chains on the wall but I didn't actualy care.
Seconds after I got my clothes down I found my sel in those chains and she was riding my like I was a fucking horse. Then she ride my face and then the dick again. In complete silence, not even a moan. That was a bit scary.
Fucked up is I was so drunk I didn't cum, but I really wanted to. When she was done, she fell on her side and cover her self, but not me.
It was january and the windo was open. :/
In the morning when I was almost freezed to dead she untied me, made me a coffee and then kicked me out.
>>707883785
>23
>7
>lost virginity in a threesome to a couple of hookers
>>707896649
cont pls!
>>707883785
>age
50
>how many women have you fucked so far
~17-20
>some crazy shit you have done or seen that will never forget tldr version
eating delicious clean dominican's ass and she sharted. she's embarrassed, I'm ewwww, but we cleaned up in the bathtub and had first anal
>23
>20ish chicks and 2 dudes
>riding freight cross country
>>707898082
I'm sorry to hear that Anon. Hope you're doing okay.
>>707883785
>30-something, don't know or care
>0
>trick animals into raping my asshole
>29
>7
>While blind drunk, a friend bet me a caribou that I wouldn't be able to make a pool shot (triple bank) with a broom handle. I did, we left the bar, went back to his place to pick up four more bottles of whisky, and hiked out into the nearby nature reserve to hunt for a caribou. We woke up in a hedge with no memory of the event, and were told about it by his roommate who stayed at his place after we left the bar. Apparently we'd been stopped by the police three times on the walk back from the bar to his place.
>>707897845
três passos - RS / Brazil
when I was 17
>20
>1
>Ive manipulated friends in the past and it makes me feel terrible to this day. I'm very self-destructive and it affects relationships
>>707898750
>>707898875
I dont see the revelance
>>707898875
I dont see the relevance
>>707887935
You are the hero this world deserves, naked virgin.
>>707883785
>20
>13
>Fucked the girl I was trying to be with's (S) best friend in S's bed next to her while she was asleep.
>fucked up their friendship and our friendship
>still disappointed
>she had an amazing ass though
>>707899107
This
>23
>3
>Got hit by a bus and before I hit the ground was hit by a car, nearly died lol
>>707898265
how was the threesome?
>just turned 19
>12
>fucked my cousin (i was pretty young tho, I dont count her in to my body count)
>>707899219
God damn man thats hardcore, glad you didnt rip
>17
>3 (One was just a one off bitch from tinder)
>Crazy shit.
>Take fat shit in public pool
>Get out as fast as possible
>Watch shit floating around
>Out of nowhere a kid raised to the surface with my shit smears all over his head
>Log falls off his head and makes decent splash noise
>He screams and everyone evacuated
>Best kik I ever had.
>23
>22
>When I was 5 I sucked my best friends dick and told him it was justified cause Jesus told me to. Haven't touched a dick other than mine since then though.
>27
>13
>when i was 16 i found my mom dead after she killed herself
>18
>0 (fell asleep before penetration)
>saved my mums dog by hitting an eagle with a rock mid-swoop
>>707899254
I smell a wincest story
>>707883785
>age:
40
>how many women have you fucked so far:
lost count at 50
>some crazy shit you have done or seen that will never forget tldr version
jumping out of airplanes at night in the army. the jump's all kinds of fucked up. end up in the trees 500m from the drop zone.
some guy in the distance got stabbed with a tree limb, is screaming bloody murder. bunch of other guys with broken legs.
get my shit and GTFO trying to make the assembly area. As I'm walking, see a dude lying on the ground, dead. his chute didn't open, chest caved in. Run over to company assembly area, tell chain of command "dead guy on the drop zone"
holy mother of fuck.jpg
report goes through the radio net, fucking officers going apeshit
fucking brigade commander shows up with his staff and says "take me to him".
I'm like "yes sir!" while thinking "oh fuck, where was he? it's dark as shit out here"
get lucky, found him. everyone stands around for a while. then: "someone's gotta get his night vision goggles out of his chest cavity and check the serial number" says the colonel.
fuck me.jpg
no one wants to do it, guess who's the lowest ranking dude there? me. I knew there was no way out of it.
it was gross.
TL:DR pulled a guy's night vision goggles out of his chest after his parachute didn't open and he went splat
moar
>>707883785
>20
>1
>almost died while sailing trough a storm
>>707899625
I dont know really. It's not very sexy. She was 8 I was 8, fucked her 3-4 times with my small half-limp dick. Wasnt very cash
>>707892025
It's OK bud, you're gonna make it.
>>707892187
interested.
>>707899643
cool jihad story bro
>>707892376
no you haven't you twink cunt.
>>707895553
I'll continue anyways.
Before the tour
>gf and i
>exploring top deck of boat
>prohibited of going up there
>i say FUCK it we might never come back again might as well
>enter a huge room looks like a bouquet hall
>i see another opening to another room
>start walking towards opening
>light turn on
>see vending machine
It's a habit to always check lose change
>as I'm fingering the machine
>a shadow from the corner of my eye from the other room
>thinking it might be an employee
>gf and i try to find said person
>enter this room which was smaller
>and no exit
>lights turned off in both room
>can't see shit
>exit both rooms and keep exploring
This was prior us checking in. If you ask nicely the person at the front desk might give you a map of boat where people say they have experienced shit.
>Lady at front desk mentions something about a room being closed to the public for whatever reason.
>GF says can we go visit
>Lady says yes but you under any circumstances may NOT go in
>gf says it's ok we just want to go visit
>ok lady says and give us room number
>i remember it being at the very end of this long hall way on second floor
>we get there and gf start hearing and feeling weird
>i confused because i don't hear or feel shit
>try opening door and it's locked
>put ear next to door like an idiot
>hear crying from other ear
>look at gf with tears
>Wtf
>she doesn't know why she crying
>she wants to leave
>we leave the area she forgets wtf just happened and starts laughing like if nothing happen
I didn't question it and never brought it up
24
0
Nothing im boring
23
27
I robbed mi local train station after I got the guardian drunk, while I was getting out get shoted in the leg, drag myself home and stich the wound, that's how I paid my third year of medical school. Not even kidding
>>707900002
did you fuck onboard? I forgot if you mentioned that in your OP.
>18
>9 or 10. About half were one night stands
>watched a man wreck his fourwheeler and he later died due to his injuries. I was 8.
On the brightside i met my soul mate that day, just can't figure out who she is or where she's at. It was love at first site.
>>707883785
>20
>0 Because work too much
>watched a 15 year old girl explode after being hit by a freight train. Her head was lodged against the windshield
>>707899237
Pretty fucking great man. They both gave great head, got footjobs from both of them. Plus they taught me a few things and gave me the confidence boost I needed to put myself out there and get chicks without paying for it.
>>707883785
28
maybe more than at least 170
fucked a mother and her 20 yr old daughter
fucked my boss got her pregnant
fucked mother in law
fucked the maid
fucked the sister in law
fucked the maids daughter
ughh lots man i live a sexually active lifestyle
>18
>0
Story
>Me 14
>Me and friends putting fireworks in peoples letter boxs
>Get caught and chased by group of grown men
>Run across field and hide in wooded area
>friend screams
>look over and see the shape of a body hanging from tree
>Run like fuck crying like a bitch
>>707900495
Sight* my bad.
>>707896849
Never seen that episode but i know what show you speak of.
The whole thing about the Queen Mary is that it's scary looking specially the closed area where not everyone had access to them. If you asked nicely they'll let you in.
I really wish i had access to them pictures to validate the authenticity of my story but meh.
>>707900002
>>707892370
so youre first and only girl ended up fucking you in the ass?
>>707900526
how did u got it?
>>707900654
oh yeah forgot spent a year in thailand
fucked and sucked a ton of ladyboys so if we inlcude them then maybe number goes from 170 to 300-400
been gangbaged
been fucked while getting sucked while sucking a cock
satyriasis!!
>>707900758
A website called naughty reviews.
>>707886062
ever get gangbanged so hard you give birth to a 3 year old?
>>707883785
28
41
I probably won't forget this overdose
>>707900983
did you paid then?
>>707900252
Yes, we stayed the night. GF set up this whole romantic/spooky night for our anniversary. She got us a room where previous guest have experienced things.
20 (soon to be 21)
18
Me and my last girl explored my darker fantasies, used a new exacto blade to slice her skin open during sex.
>>707901247
Yeah. People can say whatever they want, but that was the best $400 I've ever spent.
>19
>3
>On my 17th birthday i fucked a 14 year old in a movie theater.
Came about a foot from completely spattering this dumb bitch on a bike crossing the road in traffic
>22
>18
>My fraternity little brother and I had a 4-some with some random freshmen girls
>23
>6
I fucked my english teacher when i was 14
> not listening in class get yelled at, teacher is hot af 24 yr old, tells me to stay after to discuss behavior, calls my dad after class to come and have a meeting, she asks me to sit down. Then after a few minutes she asks why i have to be rude to her, tell her im a teenager and cant control impulses
> she sits on desk leaning in front or me, low cut shirt, muh dick, im staring at her tits and, she said okay ill make you a deal no more rudeness and you have to get an A and ill let you see them.
> confused and horney
> she pulls out her nice round tits and presents them to me.
> she tells me that I'm goingto be a handsome man.
> wut.jpeg
> i reach out and grab one
> instinctivley rubbing my dick now while hodding tit
> shes asks how far away i live told her its across entire town 30+mins with school traffic
> oh, well i guess we have time, she tell me to aay down behind her desk
> she proceeds to take out my dick and start sucking and i blew in her mouth in about a minute, but she didnt stop oh gawd my dick
>then she spit on it and slid her skirt up nnd moved her panties to tbe side
>asks if ive had sex, tell her no, she tells me shell fuck me until my dad arrives
>lol dad texted me that her doesnt care and woulndt be coming imediately after she called.
> seriously fuck her in all positions and come like 5 times and then she gets a phone call
> still fucking while on the phone
> says she has 15 minutes
> she sticks my finger in her ass and says okay lets try it
> fucking anal and i cream her inside but i doubt there was much left
> i go back to pussy and cum again
> sore entire weekend
>monday stay after class and do it again
Did this for about 2 months then school ended, i went to ber house for a few days and lived in he r vagina
> she went back to michigan for summer
See her when school starts, baby bump,
Tells me its mine.
> keep fucking her until she takes maternity leave
>>707896378
Fuck yes
>>707902166
Next time a i saw her she had our baby, cute looked like me, i fucked her again for about a month, she moved back to michigan and i never saw her again its weird a have like a 8 year old son out there somewhere
>23
>fukd 7 biches
>i let a girl suck her period off my cock to save herself from embarrassment.
>>707896045
are you me?
31
6
killed my stepdad
>>707903388
tjekked. also pics or it didnt happen
>>707883785
>39
>1 and married her after 10 years relationchip
> invaded and destroyed the catering area of metallica after a cheap show without encore at an open air festival
>>707883785
>24
>14
Haven't done anything super crazy, took 3 virginities, current gf is into bondage so that's cash
>21
>5
>worked at the red cross as paramedic, saw a guy at a car accident trying to stuff his guts back into his belly, he died 15 minutes later
25
18, half of them this year
craziest shit I ever did?
>had a threesome with me and two other dudes
idk what else I've done wilder shit than that on the criminal side of things but can't remember
also fucked a chicks throat until she puked up the tacos i had just made for us.. thank god it was in the shower, i almost puked at the smell of puke tacos
>>707900495
hahaha good shit
>>707900654
can you green text some of your fun times? for science
>31
>~80
>Married sons babysitter fucked her sister and her friend cheat often and usually with girls 18-19
>23
>15-20, lost count + bad memoru
>Had threesome with my girlfriend and one of her female friend.
>Lost virginity at 12, she was 12 too.
>Had sex with this 40-50 woman, she is married and has two children.
>21
>2
>Wanted to try anal, stuck two fingers in her ass in attempt to spread it for the cock
>my fingers had poop on them
Never tried anal cuz now she's afraid
>>707883785
in b 4 lier
>33
>192, mostly hookers
>i was drunk and fucked a trap. dat was disgusting.Never again.
18
0
not much really, really boring honestly
was molested by my step dad from the ages of like 8 - 10 idk
>22
>4
>bribed a cop with $200, it worked!
>>707896378
Now that's impressive
>>707883785
22yo
23 women
Sold the literal shirt off my back, in public, for mushrooms
Have had sex with amputee women on more than one occasion. The second time, I didn't realize until the next day that she had one arm
There's probably a lot more, I can't think.
>>707883785
>25
>28
>Bottomed for a passable tranny
>23
>10
>I used to take park in a cocaine-fueled fight club
>>707883785
> 29
> 4
> Once watched a Jeep roll over onto a girl and crush her head.
>26
>too many to count 100+ (99% whores)
>one of the whores who I saw was quite new and after I had finished fucking her ass she spun round and started sucking my dick
>mfw I saw shit on my dick and she didn't as she was too quick to get it down her throat
18 minus 1
3 girls
After my first time I went downstairs and started playing video games with my friends while she was still in my bed
28
0
N/A
>20
>3
>dude pulled a knife on me at trade school and I clubbed him with a piece of hot freshly welded metal.
>>707898726
>Tricks animals into raping him
>doesn't know how old he is
I'm not sure which part I find more bizarre.
>>707883785
>27
>48
>Crazy shit: fucking on a rain canal next to a wall three feet high facing a major intersection for $20 for her to score her Blue Sky.
>>707883785
>22
>14
>The first time I got poop dick
>>707883785
>next week 23
>lost count college parties and tinder help a lot with that
>hard to chose...
>grew shrooms in my parents' house when i was 16,
>burnt down an abandoned house with some friends when i was 17,
>had a 14 yo girlfriend when i was 20,and we are still friends with benefits...
>>707899643
jesus.
>>707908035
>>one of the whores who I saw was quite new and after I had finished fucking her ass she spun round and started sucking my dick
Shit. Didn't realise we were couting prostitutes. I'm
>>707907871
And my number of partners is closer to 25
>>707892025
If you shit yourself in front of people the only thing you can do is hero I think...can't think of anything els I would do
>>707883785
>21
>1 guy cuz femanon
>look from car window, see passed out drunktard about to be violated by another drunktard who was accompained by a kid
>>707902325
Hot as fuck, anon, do you have a picture that looks like her?
Also I think the wrstbtjing I've ever done was like five finger death punch for like a year
>>707903388
>killed my stepdad
Story?
>>707894024
Hansel!! you're a fuckwit
>>707909250
>>707909250
YES GREEN TEXT THAT SHIT
>>707894024
cunt
>>707897742
well a cat has 9 lives so now it only has 7 :^)
>>707896649
Continue ittt
Age: 40
Still a virgin
Work in a electronic store.
Craziest thing I ever did was wax my chest !
>>707910660
for a men, who have lots of hair, sounds painful
>>707887781
>36
Holy shit man, whats your secret?
In the 60s. I'm 30. Last year for my gfs birthday I fucked her and her best friend in a limo
>22
>3
>had a bisexual threesome M/M/F
>>707884207
How was he wheezing if he was dead?
>25
>4
>i assfucked my older sister and still feel bad about that
28, average guy, fucked 43.
Craziest thing was this 45 year old woman who fucked me in the sauna at a hotel I was staying at with my girlfriend while we were visiting her family for thanksgiving. I was fingering her and heard someone coming so we stopped and tried to act casual and it was the woman's daughter asking for her room key. The second she left we looked at eachother and started laughing and then fucked raw.
>>707889807
shit is so cash.
>>707883785
20
2
See someone shit in public
>>707899511
Dakota?
>>707889807
What was the breakup over?
>>707907234
r u a fgt now?
>19
>8
>Had this one fuck buddy for a few weeks once. I like feet so I would suck her toes during sexy time, and she had a nice ass which I loved eating. One night, to my surprise, she sucked on my toes (I guess to return the favor, maybe she didn't know I had a fetish), it felt pretty nice. Then, out of nowhere, she stuck her tongue in my asshole and it was the best feeling in the world. Will never forget.
>>707913395
She made you call her mommy. Didn't she?
>>707883785
>19
>1 (been dating her for the past 4 years and we fucked in the first few months)
>fucked my gfs ass for the first time while she was asleep on the couch in the living room, we were both 15. Also we're both dead inside, so we've done some very fucked up shit together.
>>707912437
Story? You have my full attention.
>20
>3
> put an ice cream cone on my dick, and let a giraffe kinda lick/ grab at it with its tongue
>24.
>31.
>Killed a man in self defense.
>>707914109
explain. Were you attacked by a wild nigger? Pls tell me you blew his brains out
>>707891055
I lol'd
>19
>none
>riding a dirt road past a junky old house and saw some guy wearing overalls walking a guy wearing nothing but a shirt, under pants and glasses on a leash with a chiuaua on a leash tied around his neck (not joking either lol)
18
3 girls
Crazy shit: was at the mall with ex gf, got tired of walking around and she told me she was horny. So we went and fucked in the bathrooms. Got caught by a cool as security guard on the way out, not allowed back in that mall
>>707883785
>age:20
>a lot, have fucked a shit load of hookers and just general sluts. Have a gf now though and am now faithful and monogamous.
>has to be some of the junkies I've fucked, nothing weirder than making a chick gag on your dick while she's still on a heroine high.
>>707897893
give explicit details anon
>Age: 25
>Girls: 14, I was lucky enough to go to a college with a huge ratio of girls to guys
>Crazy shit: saw a bike fall from the top of a shelf in a store and split my Mom's skull open. She is totally fine now though!
>>707914268
Got in a fight with another guy (got punched in the back of the head), punched him in the throat.
The end.
p.s didn't get attacked by a nigger.
>Age: 19
>Girls: 4
>Crazy shit: My girlfriend dead from a drug overdose
>>707896649
Continue you cunt!!
>>707896847
>unconcious fucking
>consensual
How? Details anon
>Age: 16
>Girls: Fingered and ate out about 12 chicks but never fucked any (no place to, at parties and shit)
>Crazy shit: I'll reply to this when I think of the best one
Someone at my school is trying to collect statistics.,
Please fill it out with a bunch of fake info.
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSe-uNdrbu2Ok8UVMTg2YeEnlDjetWMBX_4cvj08Keh-P7OeAA/viewform
>>707919451
Oh shit yeah, buttfucked my cousin on my grandma's roof during the 4th of July.
I just usually don't count that as a girl I've been with because she's my fuckin cousin.
>>707919565
everyone fill it out and put 420 as the last answer, for the lulz
>28
>6
>walked in on vice principal banging science teacher in middle school.
>>707886278
Anon from NZ here.
Legal age is 16, no exceptions to whether she is 15 and you're a day in to 16 or what ever. I think it's pretty dumb since teens are horny little shits.
Had a friend who was in a real pickle, he was 16, she 15 and her parents wanted him burnt at the stake.
>19
>3
Back when I was 13, me and a buddy were past curfew at campsite and this woman, probably 40's and really fat, came out from the "patrol lounge" that we were near. So, me and my buddy hid on this hill. And watched her squat and pee.
>>707883785
>20
>none (Sorry, straight woman here)
>got eaten out by a dog
>>707883785
>19
>6
>Fucked a girl on a balcony in a hotel and asked the neighbour one down one to the left if he wanted to come throat fuck her after i was finished with the bitch
>20
>7
>6/7 were prostitutes, spent nearly $1,500 on paying for sex and actually spent that summer selling myself to gay older men just so i could pay for sex more.
>22
>0
>Almost had sex with a gross fat old man
> 26
> 4
> Shot a nigger who broke into my house. He'll never walk again, and I got to pick spine pieces out of the cracks between my floor boards. Three rounds of 44mag do a number to a human torso.
>>707884207
fuck dude
where do you work? thats fucking awful.
also
>20
>2
>my lifes so fucking boring compared to this thread
>24
>8ish not including dudes
>youngest and only male of 4 older sisters and was "raped" by all of them. Also have fucked my passed out sleeping mom.
>>707883785
> 27
> 11
> Fucked a friend's wife in the staircase of their apartment building, only 15 feet away from their front door, while he was inside oblivious.
>>707883785
>age
19
>how many women have you fucked so far
somewhere in the high 20s
>some crazy shit you have done or seen that will never forget tldr version
watched someone flay their arm open trying to kill themselves at school at my lunch tabel
No girls, but birds. I'm 28, i used to masturbate onto birds at a local park. Not a thing that I'm particularly proud of but I became quite good at it. I was taking zinc supplements so I was shooting massive loads and it became something of a sport to me. For anyone interested here is your best strategy. first, you need to find an isolated spot so you don't become a sex offender. I found a short kind of channel area where I saw the pigeons would congregate. Next, you arouse yourself. I was usually content with envisioning the occasional jogging lady coming over and taking a shit on my chest and that was enough to fuel the fire but if you're not as sexually charged as me just take some porn on the go. After you're good an horny, you get some bread. My pigeons preferred white bread but healthier birds might have a taste for honey wheat or maybe even multigrain. Fat, unhealthy birds are slower and easier to hit so remember that. Once you are seated on the bench and ready to do the deed, whip your roosevelt out and scatter bread out within a few feet of you. use your judgement based on how far you know you can cum. I was a lonely and depraved soul who could hit targets the size of a thimble at distances up to 4 feet. You wait for the pigeons to begin eating and to get comfortable with your presence. At this point, you want to coo gently and talk sensually to them to gain their trust. Now you're finally ready to cum on your bird. This is a tough part because the rapid motion of masturbation is very frightening to the birds, so you have to be subtle. Once you master a technique, you simply wind it up and let it go, aiming depending on your past cumming experiences. I always came high so I would aim for the neck of the bird and catch it right in the face. It's an extremely satisfying and erotic feeling, seeing those birds reel around covered in cum and maybe even transporting it to other places in the city.
>>707883785
>26
>at least 4 girls + a paid whore
>I might be bi, gay or trans
18
1
My body tried killing me once. That was fun.
>Age 29
> Women fucked 30
>Crazy Shit: Me and 2 crewmates slashed a bunch of yacht buoys in Juneau Alaska while drunk one summer. Yacht buoys are different and much more expensive than normal boat buoys. I have also raped 2 women while they were sleeping.
>femanon
>18
>11 guys 2 girls
>>707883785
>21
>about 10 hookers
> groped women a lot of times
>>707925619
i'm going to need specifics
>>707926274
Diabetic ketoacidosis, Only one in the family
>>707883785
41
3
Puked on my my ex's asshole when I was barebacking her.
>20
>0
will fuck a girl monday, cant wait but im afraid i will explode as soon as she grab my wiener
>>707883785
>24
>0, but I lost my virginity to a trap yesterday
>watched a guy try to kill himself by chewing his arm off (didn't work)
Is one of the 4 your sister? Which one?
>>707883785
>23
>14
>felt up my younger sisters friend once
>we were in the car going back home, i was in
>the front seat, she was directly behind me in
>the back seat of the car, had my mother
>driving the car,
>she loved it, felt good, hnnnn
>then she told my sister at home
>then my sister told my mom
>mom gives me good old hiding of my life
>done other shit but that's enough for now
>>707883785
>26
>3
>3 some with this girl i went to her
>2nd time just us
>i fisted her then stuck my penis in her pooper >keep_fisting.exe
>her sister who she shared a room with >masturbated to us doing the deed then she >steal_man.ini
>while i was mid whatever you call that
>she began to blow me, over to her bed
>dick compliment.wav
>she said i had the perfect sized dick
>popped her eye out
>this_is_really happening.mp4
>she gave me a skull job.
>her sister got so jealous after crying
>she pulled a gun out and shot her in the head >while i was skully penetrating her sister..
kept my dick and my sanity after her dead body gargled.
>3 days later
>her sister has been throwing this party
>pimped out her dead body.
>i only find out by showing up
>subsequently leave with no std's
>>707883785
26
17
A bunch of black people fucking in my hot tub.
57
10
A police helicopter was searching for some campers who got lost, but saw us smoking pot instead.
>18
>3
>felt up my sister
>25
>0
>
>>707883785
>20
>1
I have no stories. But one time when I just started anxiety medication (lexapro) and smoked some weed, I fucked her for like an hour straight without coming. She came twice she says. I was disappointed with myself. After an hour, she should have came more than twice, but whatever.
>>707890709
damn, wow lol. glad you didn't kill yourself man
it's weird how hard they punish people for ddos
>>707908666
satan.
26
2
when i was a kid 4ish i saw a couple of times in christmas my uncle and grandfather kill pigs with a knife
>>707927623
>
>kek
