Good evening, Anon. How are things? Feeling down? Need a hug?
Let's talk.
>>746156075
You first
>>746156075
I have to put my first pet down tomorrow. Pretty rough.
free bump
>>746156562
No.
>>746156624
It is rough, Anon. How are you handling it?
>>746156770
Thank you. How've you been?
>>746156848
Well, in that case. Me and my monkey can't sleep, and the music I put on doesn't seem to soothe him so now I'm at my wits end
>>746156848
Not well. I've been lucky enough that only 1 person close to me has died. But this is much closer than that person... I'm just trying to make sure I do everything I need to so I don't look back and think "I should've done or said this".. I know I'm going to forget to do or say something
>>746156848
im all right. got some exercise in today. we'll see if i keep it up throughout the week.
>>746157025
Hm. Could you feed him, or give him something to calm him down?
>>746157053
Don't focus too much on specifics, Anon. You gave your special little guy the most attention and love you could. You're doing your best, and you shouldn't expect more of yourself.
>>746157251
That's good. Did you go on that walk on the trail? That reminds me, I should be getting more exercise... been too busy to play basketball.
>>746157318
it was rainy so i biked indoors on my trainer thing
>>746157318
I've already tried that, he isn't hungry so I strew it around in his favorite places to stimulate him. He just whines and wants attention. I might throw a hissy fit soon, and that'll just wake up my neighbours if he hasn't already. The female just sleeps through it all, but I don't know for how long if he keeps whining
>>746157430
Oh, that's good. How do you feel?
>>746157504
Huh. Weird. Are you sure there's not something wrong with him? Odd how animals can be attention whores like that... well, he doesn't know any better.
>>746157590
Hey! I'm back from my camping trip in canada!
How have things been?
>>746157590
I'm pretty certain he's completely healthy, just had him checked recently, and I keep him on a strict diet since I've been told to. Maybe it's because he can't munch as much as he wants he is like that. I don't know. the little fucker. I wouldn't dream of hurting him though, just yell at him a little. Maybe that could quiet him down if I tried ?
>>746157318
Thank you very much. I appreciate someone listening to that. I've been kind of all in my own head about it
>>746157709
Cool! How did that go? What was the best part?
Things have been pretty okay. Weather's been a little wacky, but I've been getting things done, and had a good time at comic con.
>>746157791
You might scare him into submission. Is that what you want though?
>>746157860
Sometimes I try, Anon. Sometimes that's all you need, isn't it? Someone who will listen?
I hope you can handle it, Anon. You might feel miserable for a while, but that's okay. That's natural. It'll pass, and he'll move into your positive memories.
>>746157993
As compared to this, I'd be willing to try nerly anything that doesn't hurt him, only scar him a little psychologically, he'll come around once he realises who's the boss. Or maybe I could try and give him his favorite berries even though I've been advised against it due to his teeth, but just one maybe ?
>>746157590
feels all right. the prospect of doing physical activing is really daunting until you actually do it and you actually feel good while you're doing it. i always thought that was weird.
>>746158158
Just one can't hurt, right? Don't take my word for that, I don't know anything about monkeys. If it might shut him up, go for it.
>>746158193
I know exactly how that is, and you're right, it's really weird. The anticipation is always far worse than the actual thing.
>>746158451
It's more his teeth I'm worried about, nahhhhh... I'll bring him in again tomorrow and have them recheck him, maybe they hurt. Now he just lies with the berry in the cage and has stopped whining for a while, only soft whimpers (or whatever the hell you call it). I think he might have a tooth ache since he isn't eating. Maybe they missed something in the last check
>>746158789
Huh. That's really strange. Well, at least he isn't making so much noise now. But that is worrying.
>>746156075
Fenn
>>746158913
What?
>>746157993
It went great! My favorite part was patch trading. Some guy had this kickass black and gold patch with a roman chariot on it, he wasn't willing to trade it though. I'm gl;ad you had fun at comic-con! weather was insane there. high of EIGHTY SEVEN DEGREES that day.
man there are three other threads of this style going on at once. you might not have many new figs tonight.
>>746156075
I'm having trouble admitting I'm bipolar. I really need to get help, but in order to get it I need to tell my mom about it. I doubt she would judge me, so I really don't know why I'm having such a tough time with this.
>>746158887
He just lies and stares at the berry, but it's god sent that he isn't whining anymore. I'll finish my wine and head off to bed. Thanks for the little advice you could give
I think it's a good thing I didn't yell at him if he's hurting
>>746159022
Oh, nice. Did you get some good ones though?
Weather's been hot here too, surprising after how cold it got a few days ago.
>>746159036
Well, we seem to have enough to keep it rolling here. Just wait.
>>746159192
She won't judge you. You're her son. She wants to help you, and she can't do that if you won't tell her that you need help. She'll know much more about what needs to be done, too.
Tell her tonight, or if that's inconvenient, tell her tomorrow morning.
>>746159257
Poor little guy. I hope he's alright in the morning.
Yeah, it's certainly for the best. Whatever is going on, it probably isn't his fault.
Hey Fenn-bro, I need some help, can you tell me how can I invite a girl that I don't know that well to the movies without sounding like a creep or an autist?
>>746159351
Oh yeah. i got enough patches to have all 50 states worth of councils!
How are you feeling?
>>746156075
>>746156075
I think I might start drinking again, or at least for tonight.
>>746159385
I can offer some advice on this.
Before you invite her to that, spend a few weeks getting closer to her (as a friend). After a few weeks you can ask her out. Just make sure you somewhat know her before. Also you get the added benefit of knowing if shes right for you before you ask her out.
>>746159385
Call her up.
"Hey, this is Anon. I was wondering if you wanted to come see this movie..."
Something like that. Don't overthink it. Make it casual. Pay for both tickets.
>>746159444
Oh, nice. That's pretty impressive.
I'm feeling good. Little tired, but feeling better than I did this morning.
>>746159515
Why? The cravings hitting you hard, or is something wrong?
>>746159678
>Also you get the added benefit of knowing if shes right for you before you ask her out.
>tfw nobody is right for me so I don't ask anyone out
>>746159515
Did you have a drinking problem earlier in your life? if so, don't drink. You can make it through this without drinking. I know you can.
>>746158973
How did you spend your Sunday?
>>746159810
>Why? The cravings hitting you hard, or is something wrong?
I was in the process of fixing my car and stripped a bolt, and spend too long trying to get that stripped bolt out, to no avail.
>>746159837
There's always someone right for you man. it just takes time. You got this!
>>746159901
I had a drugs problem in high school, but I stopped all of that for years, for the most part.
>>746159678
Wow, thanks for the neat advice Anon, no w that I think about it you just saved me from making a really dumb move, so again, thank you very much!
How do I deal with the fact that she doesn't love me and never will
>>746160180
Get over it, nothing lasts forever
>>746160095
Didn't do much. Went to church, read a bit. Enjoyed it.
>>746160099
That's miserable. Worthy of drinking again? Maybe. Do you know someone with more tools that might be able to get it out for you? Or could you saw it off?
>>746160180
Stop thinking about her, Anon. No matter what you do, it's going to hurt for a while. But it's hardly something to die over. Eventually you'll need to get your mind off her and onto another girl.
>>746160168
Sure man :)
>>746160142
That's great! I would really try to avoid drinking tonight. I know you can do it.
>>746160180
Hey you never know. Maybe Someday she may. But the healthy thing is to move on. try and find someone else. Who knows, maybe someone new will be a better match for you than she ever would have been?
Been looking for a job for over a year now, any money I come into from odd jobs just goes to drugs to forget about the fact that my mom abandoned me before I even got out of high school living with one her friends for free constantly feeling like a freeloading piece of shot.
>>746159810
That's good. Were you not feeling good (besides tired) this morning?
>>746160424
>That's miserable. Worthy of drinking again? Maybe.
I wouldn't say it's that specifically, but everything else with that on top of it.
>Do you know someone with more tools that might be able to get it out for you?
No.
>Or could you saw it off?
I've given up for the day, and that makes me feel bad about myself.
It's in a tight space, I'd need a small saw. I have said saw, but it may not be powerful enough.
>>746160424
What do you like to read?
>>746160485
>That's great! I would really try to avoid drinking tonight. I know you can do it.
I guess that decides it, then; I won't drink tonight.
>>746160492
It's gonna be okay man. Do you have any other family you can rely on? Is there any rehab center you could go to?
>>746160492
You may need to quit the drugs to get a steady job, Anon. You can move on from here, but it'll take a lot of work and willpower.
>>746160567
I, uh, did something pretty awful the other day. Lost a community because of it.
>>746160641
Forgetting about it for now does seem like the best option. Get some rest, leave it alone for a while. Have a beer, but don't go overboard.
>>746160678
Mostly science fiction. Right now I'm chewing through The Worm Ouroboros.
>>746160905
Nice! I'm really proud of you!
>>746160921
My family's focusing more on my aunt who recently got divorced and is struggling to raise two kids. I doubt I need rehab because I don't get addicted it's mostly psychedelics, pot, benadryl, tried meth wasn't a fan, and a lot of alcohol
>>746161034
>Forgetting about it for now does seem like the best option. Get some rest, leave it alone for a while. Have a beer, but don't go overboard.
I've decided not to drink, but I'll indulge in some snacks, instead.
>>746161102
>>746161034
Farewell.
>>746160375
How do I get over it. That's my question
>>746160424
> Eventually you'll need to get your mind off her and onto another girl
I don't want to love ever again. It hurts anon
>>746160485
This false promise that someday she may is what led to me sticking around her. We're in a casual friends with benefits thing but the sad part is that I will always want more and she will never know that from me. I'm too scared to reveal it
>>746161034
Drugs are really my only source of happiness anymore I find joy in the side jobs but I don't know if it's for the money, eating time, or actually enjoying work
>>746161034
Want to talk about it? It's okay man, I won't judge, I promise.
Everything is gonna be okay fenn.
I finally felt okay talking about the time I was raped only issue is it was to 4Chan and I feel like telling anyone will just become an issue
>>746161370
That's good. You're a stronger man than I, Anon. Take care.
>>746161415
You don't now. You have to wait until the pain stops. That may take a long time, and you may need the help of a friend to get through it.
>>746161433
It could be for all three of them, Anon. They're all good reasons to enjoy something for. Maybe you would enjoy a steady job even more.
>>746161499
Not everything is going to be okay.
I'm fine. Nothing is wrong with me. Just dealing with some angry people, some disappointed people, and some confused people. I can handle it.
>>746161614
Well, maybe you don't need to tell anyone ever again. Do you? Is it something you can live with just talking about anonymously?
>>746161614
Do you have anyone close to you that you can trust? like a sibling, best friend or SO?
I'm here to talk if you want to. I understand what you're going through.
>>746161685
>>746161614
I don't know the biggest thing I'm worried about is if they do it to someone else
>>746161685
>You don't now. You have to wait until the pain stops. That may take a long time, and you may need the help of a friend to get through it.
Its funny anon. It's exactly how she got into a casual fwb thing with me. Because some idiot she loved told her he loved her when he didn't and broke her fucking heart.
I'm that friend for her. And now, I'm in that same position she is in.
>>746162014
Is that a real danger? Do you know this person?
You might be able to report them anonymously to the cops.
>>746162040
Now you need someone to be to you what you were for her. Who could that person be? It's a little ironic, but that's just how things happen sometimes.
>>746161685
Okay. Can I help at all? Let me know if you ever want to talk about anything.
You got this. I know you can.
>>746162014
Continuation
I have a friend that knows something happen but I don't feel I could fully come out with it. And as for my SO I tried to tell her but she just laughed and made fun of me about it when we were still together
>>746162202
It's someone that all my friends at the time knew and casually talked to but it's been years since it happened no clue where they are now
>>746162202
I don't need that friend anon.
I need to deal with this alone. I can't fully sleep at night and my first thought when I wake up is her.
How do I learn to fucking sleep again
>>746162220
That sucks. Do you think you can trust your friend not to tell other people? if so, tell them if you're able. They could be able to help.
Do you want to talk about it here? it's okay to say no. I'm here to help.
>>746156075
Hey man
Anxiety's been getting a lot worse recently. Don't know how I'm going to deal with it
>>746162210
I'd like to talk about it later. Do you have email, or Discord?
I do got this. I have other people.
[email protected]
Fenn#4548
>>746162220
That's kind of awful, Anon. How well can you trust this other friend? Opening up about it to someone solid would help you a lot.
>>746162340
Maybe you'll need to find someone else then. What other friends have you got? Any close ones?
>>746162504
You're not invincible, Anon. If you need help, it's okay to admit that. This is a hard road to travel.
To sleep... melatonin? Nyquil? White noise? Video games until you can't keep your eyes open?
>>746162636
Have you talked to a therapist, Anon? They can help a lot with anxiety. It's a terrible thing to have to deal with on your own. What do you get most anxious about?
>>746162713
Social anxiety, mostly. Its starting to affect work. And no, therapy isn't something I can do right now sadly.
>>746162636
Hey, I'm not fenn but I'm here to help. Anxiety is tough to deal with, and I understand what you're going through. Do you have anyone you can talk to about this, like a friend or SO?
I'm here to help if you need me to. If you want to vent or talk about how you feel I'm here.
>>746162812
That's pretty hard, Anon. What part of social interaction gives you the most trouble? Is it just being around people, or talking to them?
>>746162713
I'll send a test on each. gmail starts with 19, discord starts with "gal"
>>746162913
Don't really have anyone to talk to about it, no. Thanks for the offer. It's getting pretty rough recently, don't have any good methods dealing with it.
>>746162999
Talking to them, I'm really bad at that. Go way out of my way to avoid doing it, and when I do I'm a wreck.
Are we getting free blowjobs tonight?
>>746162562
It was when I was a freshman in high school all my friends hung out at the public library. This one guy hung around the group he was 22-23 and he gave us smokes, and occasionally beer. One day he invited me to his house. Didn't connect two and two spend most of night heavily drinking all's fine till his fiancee came home then light drinking but my head was swimming with alcohol he convinced me to just sleep in his bed since the two of them would be up awhile longer. I agree wake up at later time. He's pumping a vodka bottle in my ass while he fucked his wife. Take minutes to realize finally understand. Manage to break his elbow and wrist I think. Pull bottle out and break on his back run two miles home with no shoes made it home at 3:30 mom was to pilled out to care.
>>746162713
>>746162504
Irrespective of when I sleep or how awfully tiring my day was, I wake up in the middle of the night.
I'll look into melatonin but I don't want to pop pills.
Why doesn't she want to love me anon
>>746163277
If you're offering...
>>746156075
what do dreams mean i never have dreams but all of a sudden im having dreams every night about all kinds of stuff
>>746163376
No, that's Fenn's job.
Yea I'd like to talk.
I just started college (UK not US so its not like US college) after missing around 2yrs of school, in 3 months I got the grades to go to college so i was pretty siked. but there's one problem, I'm anti social as fuck and actually have autism (high functioning) so sometimes I do some stupid shit or say stupid shit and I'm 17 in 3 months and have never kissed or done anything with a girl, obv had gf in primary school but that doesnt mean shit, When I was younger I neglected my hygine and I've fucked up yellow teeth and I'm sorta overweight and I just want a female in my life that just cares about me and wants to hang out to do cool stuff I'm not confident enough to ask people I talk to at college (small group of people). I just feel like shit recently because of it :/
>>746163199
It's okay man, you can get through this, I know it's tough, but you can do it. Just keep working on it, and you'll see improvement. For methods, can I suggest something? For when you're nervous, make a box of things that help calm you down beforehand, then take that out if you need to. Drink something warm, try to take it easy, and if you're really panicked, use combat breathing to help calm you down a bit. Breathe in counting 1, 2, 3, 4
Stop and hold your breath counting 1, 2, 3, 4
Exhale counting 1, 2, 3, 4, and repeat the steps.
Want to talk about anything specific?
>>746163544
fuck your academic folderino paperino collegerino
studyrino schoolrino
Bump of logistic support.
>>746163199
Practicing might help, but could turn you into a stressed-out mess. Is talking on the phone easier? Are you forced to talk to people a lot?
>>746163277
Not free tonight, Anon. $14.98
>>746163336
Melatonin isn't a drug, it's a mineral. So it won't affect you as badly as some stuff. It helps regulate and enforce your body clock.
I don't know why, Anon. You may never know why. Sometimes you just have to live in ignorance of the motivation of others.
>>746163435
Dreams don't mean much, Anon. But they can be a way for your subconscious to let out what's been bothering you, or drifting around in your mind.
>>746163544
Don't worry too much about when you get a girlfriend, Anon. Plenty of people don't have a meaningful relationship until they're in their twenties. The eternal virgin thing is a meme.
You can lose weight with time and some effort. Do some cardio and start lifting on weekends, cut back on carbs.
Don't be afraid of asking new people to hang out with you, Anon. The worst that can happen is that they say no, or are mean. You can handle that. If you're polite, and treat 'em well, chances are they'll say yes.
I think you can overcome your fear of people, Anon.
I'm okay. Just came off a big depressive episode. It had been the first time in a while that I thought about suicide. If it were not for my brother, and my family, and him. I dint think I would be here. Which is bad concidering that if they died I wouldnt have any reason not to.
hugs anyone?
>>746163826
Thanks for the ideas. I might try them. Nothing specific I guess, the social anxiety just kind of feels overpowering recently and it's starting to get to me. It's led to me being really alone in life.
>>746163998
Talking on the phone is no easier. I'm even a little nervous now typing to complete strangers. I'm forced to talk with people a lot for work, yeah.
>>746164157
Yes please. I could really use someone right now
>>746163998
>You may never know why
This is what is killing me anon. Am I unlovable.
>>746164061
hey man it's okay. I'm here for you. You want to talk?
What's with the other threads Fenn?
>>746164444
That's why I'm here
>>746164444
>4444
>>746163280
I'm sorry for being so fucked
>>746164061
It's okay to rely on the people close to you sometimes, Anon. As long as you can trust them, and have enough of them.
Don't let yourself relapse. Keep your chin up, and keep moving on. You got this.
>>746164157
*hugs you delicately*
no dick pls
>>746164208
Is therapy impossible because of the cost? Insurance could cover that... I'm sorry, I'll admit that I'm a little out of my depth here. Are you constantly in fear of them judging you?
>>746164337
Let's talk about it. What's on your mind?
>>746164400
You're not unlovable, Anon. This one girl decided she didn't want it to happen. Not necessarily because of you or something you did. And even if it were because of that, it wouldn't matter. You don't need to rely on what she thinks. You are your own man.
Hey, its car crash victim again. Today hasn't been much easier. Can I have a hug? It hasn't been a pleasant 24 hours
>>746163280
hey sorry i didn't see that.
That's a pretty rough story. I can't imagine what you're going through. Everything is gonna be okay man. I promise. Are you going to therapy?
I wish I was more alpha than I am. Where I am outcome dependent, confident and cocky.
Can a man pretend to be alpha and get to that place?
>>746164667
Yeah therapy isn't an option for cost, I don't have insurance...sorry I didn't mean to impose or anything...and yeah it's that, constantly worrying about what they think and what I'm going to say and that sort of thing.
>>746164667
>You are your own man
My parents never showed any love toward me. My best friend doesn't love me. Maybe I am unlovable
>>746164707
*many hug*
It's gonna be okay anon.
You're gonna be just fine. I know you will.
>>746164808
I went to therapy for awhile but my therapist ignored the issue since I was their for anxiety not so much depression
>>746165008
You probably are, yeah. If even your parents couldn't love you, you must be a real piece of work.
>>746164472
I don't know. I asked why there were so many, and didn't get a conclusive answer.
>>746164707
*hugs you tightly*
Did you talk to that nurse again? Have you met with your family?
It's good to hear from you again, Anon. I hope you start feeling better soon.
>>746164870
Pretend, Anon. Pretend long enough, and it will become real. Act cool and relaxed, act like you're on top of everything.
It works.
>>746164904
Hm, okay. You're not imposing, I'm just not very good at this. I could tell you all night that it doesn't matter what they think, and you can just say anything and roll with it, but that probably wouldn't help much. Have you heard all that before?
>>746164667
>Let's talk about it. What's on your mind?
I don't know what love is anon. I feel like I'm a monster. I got raped when I was 9 years old. It's led me to only attaching intimacy to sexual relationships and not emotional relationships like friendship. I feel like I'm a monster
>>746165172
Are you a femanon?
>>746165172
Yeah, I've heard that sort of thing before. I guess it's maybe just a problem I can't solve right now, I'll have to live with it. Sorry for bothering you.
>>746164667
God I wish it were easy. Basically anything will send me I into another episode. I am just thinking of getting on something because my bipolar is far more detrimental than my ADHD
>>746165172
Yeah I talked to her. She's so full of love and care, she's an angel. My dad came by today and dropped me off some steak dinner after my surgery to fix my lung. Not much has happened since. I feel so lonely
>>746165008
You're not unlovable, Anon. I love you as much as an anonymous stranger on the internet can. You may have been surrounded by terrible people, but that doesn't make you a bad person. Don't judge yourself by their actions.
>>746165217
You're no monster, Anon. I know a couple, and you're nothing like them. That's a terrible thing to deal with. Was it ever resolved in your mind?
The association might be changed slowly over time. I don't know much about that though.
>>746165271
No. I am not.
>>746165345
I wish I had more to tell you, Anon. I'm sorry that I can't help. But maybe things can't change just yet. You're not bothering me at all. I like talking to people.
>>746165461
What would you take for that? What has your doctor said?
>>746165539
That's wonderful, Anon. But to be lonely when you're like this is a terrible thing. Does talking here help with that?
>>746165625
>I love you as much as an anonymous stranger on the internet can
Thank you for this anon. Thanks for talking to me.
I guess escapism is my way out of this. I'll just live in denial until I have to deal with the feeling when it comes up again
>>746165625
Have not talked to one about this. I don't have immediate coverage right now
>>746165625
>Was it ever resolved in your mind?
No, anon. I can't talk about it because I'm ashamed of my past. I feel like people are going to give me pity and sympathy when I don't want any of that. I just want normal.
I just don't know what love is anon. My parents surely love me as does my brother but I have no idea how to see that love. Or how to feel it.
>>746156075
I just worked 4 days of 16 hour shifts in 90+ degree heat. And I feel like I just lost a fist fight with Satan. My girlfriend is at her mother's cabin in the Upper Peninsula for a family reunion where I'm fairly sure she's gonna wind up getting drunk and fucking her sister's boyfriend. I'm completely exhausted, but I can't sleep.
>>746165625
I don't have any issues, I just wanted to let you know that you're doing an excellent job here. I and many other anons appreciate this, especially when it feels like there's no where else to go.
Hi Fenn. I've talked to you a few days, you probably wouldn't remember me. I'm going to be offing myself soon, just wanted to say thanks for all your support. It was nice to have someone to talk to about it.
>>746156075
It may be selfish, but the worst thing I have encountered in life is being able to have anything you want, through personal effort, but not being able to have the one person you want the most. It is easy to get material things, like a fast car or a fancy place to live, but it hurts to know the one person that makes you the most happy, just by their very presence, is the one thing you will never have.
Have isn't even used as in a possessive sense... it is just to mean the one person you can spend your time with, to share experiences and make memories with. To sit on the porch at night, stare up at the stars, and talk.
But that will never happen.
Not now.
When you can have anything you want, but not the one thing you need the most: love....
>>746165625
Yeah it does, it makes me feel I have at least some sort of connection with people now a days
>>746166135
Why do you feel like you can't have love anon?
>>746166079
Hey it's gonna be okay man, you don't have to do this. Is there any chance you could take a trip to a psychiatric hospital and see if they could help?
>>746165791
Sometimes hiding is the only way, Anon. It's strange and can still be painful, but if it works, it works.
>>746165861
Is there a chance you could get a free consult?
A doctor might be able to help you, a therapist may be able to help you even more.
>>746165941
Well, you care for those people and wouldn't want anything bad to happen to them, right? And you want them to be happy? Do you feel that? That's a kind of love.
>>746165949
You're a real man for enduring that, Anon. Can you not sleep for fear of what your girlfriend might do?
>>746165978
Ah, thank you Anon. I appreciate the kind words.
>>746166079
I'm sorry to hear that, Anon. I wish I could talk you out of it, but I don't think I can. Thank you for coming back. Which one were you? Give me a little more information, and I probably will remember you.
>>746166135
There's something that can be hard for everyone, regardless of financial standing or ability to work. Odd how the playing field is leveled there.
Where have you been looking for love, Anon?
>>746166250
That's good. We can talk until the thread dies, and then, if you want, we can talk some more. Do you want my email and Discord?
>>746166510
A psychiatric hospital? Is that a thing? Sorry I'm kind of dumb, never heard of that.
>>746166579
Yeah, I appreciate you being willing to talk though. I was just some mopey guy chatting with you. Thanks for understanding.
>>746166579
>Well, you care for those people and wouldn't want anything bad to happen to them, right? And you want them to be happy? Do you feel that? That's a kind of love.
I think that's just human duty, right?
>>746166348
I usually feel like I don't relate to most people on an inter-personal level. Each time I have 'opened up' it usually just ends in sadness.
>>746166579
There was this one girl I had feelings for for quite some time, but I am coming to grips with the reality that there will never be anything between us. It is difficult fighting your own mind. Most of it has been fighting off depression, and when she came around it was like a light through the clouds. But it is obvious now that the light was superficial, which makes it hurt worse.
>>746156075
I need rule34 of op's pic, is what I need.
>>746166996
>Each time I have 'opened up' it usually just ends in sadness
And how many times have you done that anon? I feel like your sample size is really small
>>746166739
You're not dumb. Psychiatric hospitals are a real thing.
I like talking to people, Anon. I don't mind a little mopeyness. You seem cool to me.
>>746166905
That's not just human duty. You're going beyond just fending for yourself. You care for them, and that is what love is. Granted, it's not as deep or as strong as some other kinds, but it's a start.
>>746166996
It's hard to deal with Anon, but eventually you'll be able to move on and find someone else. This pain won't last forever.
>>746166999
Check Danbooru.
>>746167524
Hmm. No idea where I'd look for one even if I wanted to go. Not sure why I would. I'm not cool really lol but thanks.
Just got back from a deployment my girlfriend ditched me for a guy she was more than likely cheating on me with. I'm back on leave right now but really the only thing I want to do is go back overseas away from everyone. My drug and alcohol use has also gotten worse
>>746167524
>That's not just human duty
I guess it's a start. But I feel like I can never go beyond this
>>746167346
Sorry if I don't have to have opened up to 10+ people to be emotionally scarred from the one that died.
>>746167981
You can't expect to get it right on the first try anon.
You let your walls down and let someone in. Then got stung for it. You won't get over it. It's a memory, a lesson, another gamble of love loss and life. Unpredictable but worth the risk.
And you have to take the bandaid off eventually. You have to let it bleed. Feel that pain and greet it with defiance.
Pull yourself together /b/ro cause it sounds like your mind is messing you up more than the girl did. Don't become your own enemy
>>746167663
Do a little research. You might have better luck with an independent therapist.
>>746167698
That's awful, Anon. Maybe it would be best to get away for a while. When you come back next, you'll find some new people and get going in the social world again.
>>746167906
Why not, Anon? Much of love is founded on trust. How much do you trust the people around you?
>>746168221
Thanks. I have reached the same conclusion that you have already. I am battling myself, which is the worst possible enemy. So far being here each day has been a success. I try and remind myself that once you reach rock-bottom it is the perfect foundation to build upon.
>>746168536
Yeah maybe. We'll see. But since likely not, goodbye.
>>746168536
I would love to get away. The problem is I have to be back on base this week so really I can't get away like I want to until my contract is up
>>746166579
>Can you not sleep for fear of what your girlfriend might do?
Part of it is that. Another part of it is pain. I dropped a 22 inch car rim on my hand, smashing 3 fingers between IT and the balancer spindle friday. I'm pretty sure at least one, if not 2 of the phalanges in those fingers are broken. Another part of it is loneliness. My girlfriend is a great girl, but even though we've been together for over a year, I still feel like I'm a stranger to her. I dunno, I think I'm just fucked in the head anymore.
>>746168536
Not much anon. Mistrust might as well be my middle name. None of my closest friends know this and ever will.
I don't even share my phone lock code for the fear of being judged for my actions
>>746168716
Sleep well, Anon. Take care.
>>746168870
Well, you're stuck. You'll have to wait this one out. You can do that. You're a strong man, Anon.
>>746168902
Ow, that's bad. That's really bad. You've been to the doctor, right? They might not heal right if you don't get them treated.
Have you and her not really opened up to each other about what makes you tick? Do you not know each other on a level deeper than the superficial?
>>746169119
Trust can be built up. Don't share your phone lock code. Start trusting people with small things, though. Find out who you can really trust.
>>746169119
>>746169295
I feel like anonymity is the only place where I'm comfortable sharing anon. It's my comfort zone. I don't think I want to get away from there
>>746169119
I am alot like that, I keep to myself and don't really like talking about anything I do because I've been judged harshly in the past.
Trust is something that needs to be earned, and if people haven't earned it, Then so-be-it.
Is there something that's caused this mistrust in you?
>>746169540
My dark past anon. I was raped when I was 9. I'm a guy
And what sucks is I feel like I'm the monster
Death is the only cure for my disease. I want it all to stop. The desires the loneliness, but its not lts like any woman would want me. I just don't want to harm any kids, and make them go through what I have to. God must really hate me.
>>746169752
are you
>>746169618
What should someone do with a hopeless love?
>>746169811
No anon
>>746169618
You're not, What happened to you is horrendous, but Not everyone is going to take advantage of you like that.
>>746169450
It's not the best solution, but it's certainly better than holding everything in your head forever. Why don't we settle for this as a current but not permanent state? You may feel differently at some point in the future.
>>746169540
Oh, hello.
>>746169873
how long have you known you were sexually attracted to children?
>>746169752
Are you unable to live with it anymore? Why are you so certain no woman would want you?
>>746169868
Move on. Let go.
>>746169929
I wish I could believe that anon.
>>746169946
I guess anon. I just wanted to share. I want to feel like I'm not ugly
>>746169295
>Do you not know each other on a level deeper than the superficial?
I know her probably better than she knows herself. Which is why I'm so worried about her this week. I know before she met me, she had a long series of relationships where she ruined them by cheating. For over a year she has been 100% faithful to me though. But I also know she had (or probably still has) a huge crush on her sister's boyfriend, so I don't know if she'll fall into her old habits this week or not.
As far as her knowing ME... That is a whole different matter. How exactly do you sit down, and tell someone about being forced into foster care because your mother tried beating you to death, only to be physically, and sexually abused for years? It's not a subject I willingly visit often. It's made me a stranger in a room full of friends my whole life.
>>746170178
So deep down, you believe I am going to take advantage of you?
>>746169981
I'm>>746169752
Since I was 18
>>746170101
I don't know when I am going to have a lapse in judgement. I'm a 5'2ish manlet fat and socially retarded.
>>746170386
oh whoops i might have replied to the wrong post lol. tell me anon, do you only have attractions towards kids or are you also attracted to women your age?
>>746170178
I wish that I could make you feel better, Anon. You're not ugly, you're not a monster. But I don't know how to convince you of that.
>>746170248
Has she never asked? You may need to force yourself to open up about it if you want things to work out in the end. If she knew and could support you, that might help you a lot.
>>746170386
Restrain yourself. Divide your mind into your inside life and your outside life. The outside life part would never dream of hurting anyone. The inside life part of your mind is where you are genuine with yourself, but only in private.
>>746170498
Some women and some men. Mainly short hairsd girls and twinks
>tfw you're 24 and should have your life sorted out
>tfw you feel ugly af and think everyone feels the same about you
>tfw your friends give you compliments but you think they are just trying to boost your ego
>tfw you constantly feel like a failure
>tfw you never improve anything you put your mind too.
>tfw you start to Question why even try to fix yourself
>tfw you feel inferior to all your friends but don't wanna say anything because what is there to say
>tfw when you feel like you're just coasting in life
>>746156075
Hope in not too late! Im moving soon and everything is packed up... Dont wanna go... feels bad.... tonight is the last night ill get to sleep in my own bed tommorrow ill be sleeping on an air matress with a sleeping bag and a pillow and may e once in a hotel. Then we wont be done unpacking for a few weeks.... *hands teto to OP* heres teto btw....
>>746170797
What exactly is teto?
>>746170688
that's an important thing to take note of. many people are only attracted to kids and to them they feel only desperation. you do have options open to you anon. if you feel you aren't attractive or witty enough to find a partner, the first place to start is to improve the way you feel about yourself.
what you should know is that the attractions you feel aren't a sinister monster that will consume you or turn into something outside of your control. we don't turn into werewolves at the full moon and go on a rampage. you don't have to be afraid of the attractions you have for kids. does that make sense?
>>746170958
A fox squirrel..
>>746170706
It's never too late to get better, Anon. Do you want to talk more about it?
If your friends are complimenting you, it's because they think good things about you and they want you to know it. Give them the benefit of the doubt. You're not a failure Anon, though you may feel like one. You've done plenty of worthwhile things.
And you can start improving yourself now if you put your mind to it. Improve your attitude first. Let a little bit of hope take root.
>>746170797
Never too late to join one of these threads, Anon. Thank you for the squirrel-fox. You have to go, Anon. It's time to let go. You've done all you can, and this is the end. Say goodbye, and be gone.
I like a girl but I have a girlfriend. Girl I like never responds to me anyway so whats the point.
>>746171138
Well ive been here since elementary school, i lost all communication with all the people i knew in highschool, so im ready to leave. But ill miss afew good friends i made while i lived here... *hugs* but ill be fine i guess.
>>746171164
Do you not like your girlfriend?
>>746171364
*hugs you back*
You guess? You will be fine. Do you plan to keep in contact with them?
You will find new people. You will do well in the new place. It'll be good.
>>746170587
>Has she never asked?
I guess I rely on the "I don't wanna talk about it" rebuttal a lot. She's seen my scars. She knows I've been through some shit. I guess I worry the real reason she's still with me, is just because I'm comfortable.
>>746171006
Yeah it makes sense. The only problem is I keep escalating. I started with shotacon ans now I'm on /bl/ fapping to pics if real boys in undies. I need to learm how to stop myself. I've been around kids before try and learn how to control myself
tickle my densely forested taint OP
>>746171476
Yeah if possible, were both in college and he has a gf now, also were gonna be states apart. Hopefully i do meet new people, but im really shy and quiet, so its gonna be hard.
>>746171138
What is there to talk about ? I'll talk but don't really know what else to say..
>>746171599
Hm. I think it's very important that you open up to her about it at some point, Anon. And better sooner rather than later.
>>746171684
No.
>>746171732
It'll be hard, but that doesn't mean you can't do it. Have some confidence! You've got this.
>>746171810
What games do you play?
I feel so cold right now, can I have a hug? I'm so sad at the moment
How to deal with my LDR where it doesn't feel right?
>>746171924
*hugs*
We all need a hug friend
>>746171912
Don't really play any vidya
>>746171912
I hope so...
>>746170376
No. It's only in anonymity that I find comfort anon. You can't take advantage of me because you don't know. You can't judge me because you can't see me.
>>746171642
i would urge you to steer clear of real pics, legal or not. it's really hard to stop once you've started. i know that. you will feel worse and worse about yourself afterwards. and i don't want you escalating in the material you use for pornography. i personally stick to 2d, and i never feel bad about it afterwards. quitting real pics was the best thing i did for myself in the last 5 years i think. do you think you can do that? do you think you can stop looking at real boys?
as far as being around kids, i never really had many opportunities to be around them. the few times i did were beneficial to me. i can't explain why. i felt less afraid of myself. but although we're not werewolves we can still do foolish things when we are sad and lonely.
>>746171924
*hugs you tightly*
Why are you sad, Anon?
>>746171942
Well, what could be the source of this uncertain feeling, Anon? Has she been acting strange?
>>746172050
Okay. Do you have any spare time? What do you do with it?
>>746172100
I know it. You'll be fine.
>>746172351
I spend the majority of my time on youtube/ porn and on dating websites, no success though.
I'm trying to stop watching porn and have been going to the gym to improve my life. Been almost a month though and no progress, gonna keep at it because I'm in the routine now.
I also spend copious amount of hours on 4chin
>>746172177
I won't take advantage of you because it goes completely against my morals.
It's hard to believe, and you don't have to trust me, But not everyone is out to get you. Like Fenn, and myself.
>>746172608
The progress is there, you just can't see it yet. 4chan is a terrible place. /b/ especially. That's the big thing to wean yourself off of.
>>746172659
I understand anon. But if we met in person I'd find it difficult to open up yo uoi
>>746172351
Ok, im gonna head to bed *hugs tightly* thanks fenn.
>>746172351
I'm sad because of my gf. I really feel I don't deserve her. I'm a creep and she's like Aphrodite, I just don't deserve her. I don't think I make her happy.
>>746172351
More like when she say's "I love you" it doesn't feel genuine. I don't feel like she really means it. She's rather impatient, most of the times immature, anxious, and really doesn't bother with meaningful talks. Often complains about being tired, irritable, stressed, or pissy and is your typical "school is so hard, I want to die". We're both young and whatnot but I'm really looking for something serious, whereas, it's almost like she doesn't care most of the time.
>>746172763
It's addicting and I feel like I can be myself since no one can judge me. I'm also on the same boat as
>>746172777
It's easier to be open when no one knows you. I hate opening up to people that I know because they start worrying about you, or they don't really care about it.
Ppl on b don't care about you but theyll listen and offer suggestion without the worrying aspect. You can get the best advice on b when you look past the KYS comments
>>746172321
Yeah I can do that I'll stick to stories. Anyways ive been talking to this guy, he doesn't know but using him as a substitute helps, even if it seems all he wants is my body
>>746156075
i just saw a picture of "her" happy with him.
the way she was looking at him.
Was a distant reminder of how she looked at me.
And a testament to how hard I tried and gave it my very best but it wasn't good enough.
>Id be a liar if I said I wasn't envious
And that being said I feel envious rage.
>What did he have that I didn't?
>I'm charming
>good looking
>intelligent
>Im unique in every way
>and im superior in every way
If i had it my way I'd rip you both limb from limb.
>Im tired of this so tired of losing all the time
Im better then this and before I'm done everyone will know who I am.
>monsters arent born, they are made
>>746172777
Which is completely understandable, In person is much harder than here. I can't tell you how to live your life, but I can suggest forming a personal connection with someone and opening up to them when you're comfortable.
>>746173041
There's more than a few of us that Actually care.
>>746172841
Sounds good. Sleep well!
*hugs you back*
>>746172878
She's with you because she wants to be, Anon. Respect that, and be the best you can for her.
>>746172998
Hm. Have you talked to her about how she's not taking this seriously and that bothers you? If she won't talk to you about that, this may just not work out.
>>746173041
That is true. But eventually you need to get used to the real world, where people will judge you, and you will be held accountable for your actions. It's important to understand that, and to learn to live every aspect of your life as though it matters.
>>746173288
Who can fathom the mind of a woman, Anon? But to think of yourself as superior to another man in every way is just narcissistic. You may be telling yourself with to deal with not feeling good enough.
Move on from this girl. She's not worth getting this upset about.
>>746173342
Why do you care so much about ppl on b?
>>746173435
Not so much about people on here, I care about the world at large.
I am fated to make those lives around me better, in some way. If I can make people smile even for a few minutes, I have done my job.
>>746173418
I agree with the actions of being accountable and you should always think before you act.
With expressing emotions thoufh there's no point in expressing your failures with your peers. Why put someone you care about through the troubles of worrying about you, or why tell them your problems when they don't really care. It's a waste and 4chan is an easier outlet for that.
I only will express emotions of joy or happiness to my friends and family, haven't had alot of those recently though lol.
>>746156075
A bunch of my friends kicked me out of a possible living arrangement after they didn't have a use for my credit score for leasing and now refuse to hangout or talk to me and I don't know what I did that could have made them act like that or even if I did anything.So now I'm trying to get my head around having 3 less friends.
>>746173114
that's good! the more you focus on relationships with other adults, i think the less your other attractions will trouble you. i hope you're wrong and he doesn't only appreciate you for your body.
do you have any friends, online or off, that you're able to talk about your issues with?
>>746173418
I've talked to her about these sorts of things but eventually, it ends up with her saying I'm "stressing her out" or "I'm too tired for this, let's just stop, you're right, whatever" or "oh my god why are you so pissy", which is why I don't bother with these talks any more.
Legit, what's the point if it's always gonna end up this way?
>>746173591
Why do you feel like your destiny is meant to be that?
>>746173899
Nooo. That is why in post here. That id the fastest way to lose friends
>>746173288
Im so tired of everything.
>Im not looking for pitty
I can handle more then most people.
>so dont you ever fucking look down on me
Im tired of
>being betrayed
>manipulated
>then discarded
So I don't care anymore, about anyone.
Ambitions of love and a normal life have left me.
Every time I see a happy couple I turn my head in disgust.
>the envious re hateful of everything they dont have
>because thats what they want the most.
>>746156075
Hey fenn its Z and im back
>>746173807
But isn't that the whole point of having reliable people? To have someone to rely on in times of need? 4chan is a pretty unhealthy way to deal with it. It's better than holding it in your head, but it's not nearly as good as it would be if you had someone in real life to talk to.
>>746173887
I don't think you did anything, Anon. They just don't see you as a resource anymore. It's hard to get your head around, but things can be weird and sudden like that. I'm sorry Anon.
>>746173917
Well, don't bother. If she won't connect with you emotionally, you can't sustain a long-term relationship or a marriage.
>>746174122
Z! How've you been? It's been a little while since we last talked, hasn't it?
>>746173932
So that people like you may be happy.
My streak of having good days ended. Back to being lonely and miserable.
>>746174242
But I'm not happy. Why is that Anon
Why does it hurt so much to try my hardest to be happy? Why does it fail.
>>746174273
Will the good days come again, Anon? I think they will.
>>746174211
Yeah it's been some time, haven't had much time in the field but I've been alright. Socializing more and feeling slightly happier but....I still have this empty feeling inside me....
>>746174457
Hey, that's not so bad. You're improving. What's causing the emptiness? Do you know?
>>746174407
You've gotta have the bad to know when the good is, if life were all good, it would all meld together in a bland mess.
>>746174129
But in real life they'll ask for progress and when I don't have any progress then it's just back to square one. It's like a broken record.
Maybe once I see progress I'll start indulging this information to my friends
>>746156075
I'm 24 and a loser, and it turns out I'm actually autistic, and my parents just decided to ignore it, I could've gotten help, I could've been taught to have a social life or interact with people better, but my parents were just "those doctors just want more money"
I genuinely hope they go to hell for what they did to me
>>746174061
that's definitely true, unfortunately.
i do have a bad habit of frequenting Fenn's threads lately. but if you like, you can always make a quick email account and touch base with me. you can always shoot me a line at [email protected] which gets checked daily or every other day.
if you need a quick email account you can make one at cock.li, it doesn't require anything stupid like your phone number or real name.
>>746174129
But I feel like I won't find someone as close to my tastes bar personality. I've only been on a couple dates and that's led to nowhere. I don't know who else would date a waste of space like me. Sure, I'm tall, dark, and most definitely not handsome, but I really don't think any one else will give me a decent enough chance.
>>746174532
I...I think it's this feeling of perpetual lonliness I feel inside....everyone around me has someone they're dating, married to or whatever but me....I haven't been able to find someone in like 4 years
>>746174129
Yea it's been an eye opener. The people that are still my friends are on my side about it but it's a big change for me
>>746174532
Hi again Fenn. How's things tonight?
>Fucked over by my mother when I was a kid
>Now I don't even feel worthy to have relationships
>This lack of self confidence is ruining my chances of ever marrying and having kids because any time it starts to go anywhere I shut down
>Have turned complete 'sour grapes' on women because of this
What do I do bros? How can I stop sabotaging myself and learn to act in my favor? My current projected path is dying alone on a rainy thursday afternoon, and I don't want that, but I honestly cannot see a way out of it.
>>746174694
Maybe the real life interaction is what you need in order to make progress. When progress isn't made, they'll be able to adapt to help you get better.
>>746174743
You can't change the past, Anon. You just have to deal with it now. Can you build those skills up on your own? It's unfair and it's hard, but if that's what you want then you'll need to get it yourself.
>>746174835
Keep trying. Don't give up because of what you expect them to think. That's stupid.
>>746174861
It takes some people a long time, Z. That's okay. Don't be mean to yourself for it. You don't need to focus too much on finding someone special yet.
>>746174891
It's how the world is, Anon. The world is a strange and terrible place.
>>746174949
Hello. Things are going pretty well for me tonight, aside from my internet being slow again. How are you doing?
>>746156075
I'm fine, but I know this suicidal chick and I'm afraid she's going to off herself
>>746175196
Have you talked to a therapist about this, Anon? They can probably help you a lot. But ultimately, you're the one who has to dig yourself out of this.
Not all women are like her. There are a few really good ones. But they can be hard to find. Don't let yourself base your judgement of all women on such a small sample.
>>746175442
Is there anything you can do to help her? Will she listen to you?
>>746175287
Maybe. I'm going to go to bed now though. Got work tmrw morning
Thanks for listening to my problems. I'll thinknaboutbyour advice and hope to update you with positive progress during your next thread. Do you make these threads on the regular?
You'll know it's me. I'll end the first post I make with:
Ilikeseeingredlights
>>746175287
Thing is I want to find someone....I want to get rid of these thoughts of the people who broke my heart I want someone to make them all go away
>>746175513
I think she will if I said the right thing. Whenever I say anything to her she doesn't listen. I want her to listen to me but I don't understand how. I'm not a psychologist.
I have a girlfriend, we've had a long distance relationship for almost a year, she's made me really happy for the entire time I've known her because I've never cared about my life, we've still been happy with each other, her parents never knew I existed but when they found out they tried to block our communication, and i haven't talked to her in 1 month because of it, what do I do
>>746175287
I'm pretty good. Things aren't great but ill live :).
>>746175461
>Therapist
nah. Being anonymous is a shield, I wouldn't say any of this to people's faces.
>I have to dig myself out of this
I know, but I don't know how. Right now I just don't think about it, but that doesn't help.
>Not all women are like her
Fuck I hope not, but even if I do find that rare unicorn, why should she pick me over some guy that's actually good?
I feel bad for bitching about something so small but this is probably the only place that I can say stuff and not regret it later.
Just hoping I don't have AIDS. Might have the clap or something. I can live with that. Just please not AIDS.
It's genuinely touching to see this side of /b/
>>746175642
Make a fake account if it is social media wise, or own up and take a week off, and go see your lady.
>>746175549
Sleep well, Anon. Don't feel obligated to come back if you don't want to.
I make these threads almost every evening. I'll do my best to remember you.
>>746175564
The answer could be somewhere you don't expect it to be. Did you see the therapist, or are you planning to? Have you met any girls you're interested in?
>>746175641
I've never been able to say the right thing either, Anon. I wish I could help. But I can't.
Do something different from what other people would do. They'd all be sympathetic and all over her with worry, right? What can you do that's different, that will stand out?
>>746175642
Hm. That's pretty bad, Anon. There isn't much you can do for her. She'll have to work that out on her end.
Have you considered looking for other girls closer to you? You can't hang onto her forever, if this goes on.
>>746175776
Do you want to talk about them? You sound like you're handling everything pretty well.
>>746175915
I think you need to get over your fear of real people and talk to a therapist, Anon. It's not as hard as you expect it to be. They'll be able to help you dig yourself out.
Not thinking about it will never get you anywhere.
She won't pick you because you don't act like you're good enough.
Act like you're good enough, or better. Look at what successful men do, and model your behavior after them.
>>746176102
Are you waiting for test results to come back?
It's scary, Anon.
But if it turns out you've got HIV, that may not necessarily turn into AIDS. Right?
>>746176163
I'm glad you like it, Anon. It's hard to do sometimes.
My girlfriend of 8 years died 2 years ago. It still hurts now just as much as it did then. I just want the pain to go away.
>>746174061
i'm actually going to sign off for the night since i have work in the morning. maybe i'll see you around anon. may a beautiful shota visit you in your dreams and make you feel happiness.
>>746176297
I only know her on the internet but I've known her for ~3 years. I thought we could meet up somewhere IRL, because I know she listens to IRL friends more than the internet ones, but based on pictures she's posted I think she's on the west coast, and I'm in the midwest.
If we do live close to each other and meet up I think I could keep her from killing herself. I could physically be there, y'know.
>>746176297
No to all three...seems ng a therapist is still stupid hard in the army.... We just had a guy go AWOL because he couldn't see one and while I'm more sociable with the people I work with....going out and....flirting still sends me into an anxious meltdown
I have two different therapists that i talk to weekly because I'm fucked in the head.
I find both of them attractive, how best to get them into a 3-way?
I want to cry but I can't feel
>>746176297
Can't get tested until the end of the month but lets just say I've been a degenerate idiot recently. When I got throat thrush a while a go it alarmed me although I think I've had that before on a clean bill of STD health so who knows. I need to stop playing russian roulette with sluts. Gonna at least get tested for the clap and stuff next week as I have weird burning sensation around my right hip and my piss kind of stings.
>>746176432
You're still thinking about her Anon, and you're not thinking about anyone else. Find someone else to rest your mind on. Open yourself up to finding another girl.
>>746176563
Meeting her IRL doesn't seem feasible at this time. Are you certain you can't talk her down online? Could you video call her?
>>746176616
Hm. Yes, you've told me... that is hard.
Flirting is a later stage. Okay, I tried to jump too far ahead. You're taking small steps Z, and they're in the right direction. You are getting better.
>>746176659
Ask them directly. Seems like a terrible idea to me though.
>>746176674
Why not, Anon? Do you know?
>>746176858
Hm. That is worrying, Anon. All you can do at this point is wait and hope. Good luck to you. I hope it isn't anything serious.
>>746176974
I think I could online if I had a deeper understanding of psychology. I never thought of a video call that would probably work better than kik
>>746176974
I just know I just don't want pain. Everyone leaves and it feels like everything is melting.
I wanna die so bad right now, I just want it to end. Can you spare a hug please?
>>746176974
Thanks me too. Of course google doesn't help. Everything is Cancer or AIDS on the internet.
>>746177218
Hug <3
I'm talking to non existent people.
>>746176974
It's just no matter how hard I try to move on I only think about my ex....and then I look at myself and realize that I have no traits women today think are attractive....even my hobbies are considered unattractive
>>746176974
i've been mulling it over for 2 days now, and i cant decide if i want to go try and fuck this girl that used to be part of my friend group. she did some shit and basically alienated a member of our group for like 2 months, and all of us were under her whiteknight guise, so all of us felt really shitty about it, but we've basically stopped talking to her and reconnected with the previous friend. i kinda want to go see if a can fuck this girl so i can just lose my V card, but i also dont want to go behind my friends backs. i know if i bring it up with my friends, ill get a bunch of shit like, "oh, shes such a bad person though" or "why would you want to have sex with her, she's unattractive, and might try and fuck you over"
>>746177397
i exist
>>746176974
I've tried, but it has yet to work. All of my thoughts just go back to her. I don't want anyone else, I just want her back.
>>746156075
Was kinda fapping, then had to stop suddenly, now my right ball hurts a bit, is this the fabled blue balls?
rough day anon, landlord died today; building to be sold. Missed by competition by a technicality; 6 months till it can be made up. Mildly poisoned myself; use a dust mask kids.
Can be my own being but, rough day nonetheless.
>>746177116
Try to convince her to use Skype. You might have better luck with that.
You don't need a deeper understanding of psychology. You need to give her someone to talk to. Be there to listen.
>>746177196
Everything is melting? That's an awful feeling, Anon. Can you find new people?
>>746177218
*hugs you tightly*
Why do you want to die, Anon?
>>746177227
Never trust the internet when it comes to diseases. Don't even look. It'll only increase the dread.
>>746177397
Well, you're talking to something. It may just not be what you expect.
They exist.
>>746177403
>women today
Look, you're way oversimplifying and overgeneralizing. Somebody likes what you look like. And somebody will like what you do. But nobody will be able to find you if you keep tearing yourself down like this, Z. Don't plan out what they're going to think of you. Put on your best face, and let it happen. Open up your expectations.
>>746177458
Which is more important to you? Having sex, or upholding the morals of you and your friends?
You might look for some other easy girl.
>>746177609
But you can't have her back, Anon. Something else needs to change.
>>746177622
If you finish now it should feel better, and if you leave it it'll hurt more and then eventually go away.
>>746177788
What a combination of events. You're putting a good face on things, but that's got to be hard to deal with. I'm impressed, Anon.
>>746177923
damn I cant finish now...
so it is blue balls then? fuck...
>>746178068
It could be. I don't know exactly what that is, sorry. Just leave it be, and get some sleep. It'll be uncomfortable for a while, but it will get better.
>>746156075
I would like a hug too please. My head hurts.
>>746177923
I can find people. Just can't seem human cause I don't want to be emotionally attached. OP you're the best for listening.
>>746177923
THANK YOU! I forgot she got a discord a while back. Nobody ever uses it but if I can find her account we could do voice calls. Unless discord does video calls I haven't used it in a while. I could probably go to a video call from there on skype/whatever, and I think that'll be enough contact between us for me to be able to listen to her, and get her to listen to me.
>>746177923
I'm just so used to rejection at this point in life....I'm always kept around to other can feel happy and then dumped like I never meant anything....for fucks sake my best friend of 4 years used me and my emotions just to escape a bad engagement and then abandoned me like I was nothing to her....
Maybe...it's because I really am nothing to people....maybe God or whoever is up there, if they even exist, made me just to be alone forever
>>746177923
I want to die because I got jumped by people who I thought were my friends.my own fucking brother was in it and he broke my fucking nose. Everyone is going to ask questions tomorrow and I'm not ready to face this yet. I wanna die so much because I feel like I don't matter, I feel so betrayed.
>>746178172
it's okay, thanks anyway! Damn isn't my bedtime...ill have to grind through the pain!
>>746156075
I am feeling okay but me and my girlfriend recently got into an argument and she told me how the spark was gone, how she would always try to get me to change my habits to build a stronger relationship and I would neglect her and then she goes and makes this decision where she wants to have a Courting relationship...but now it's long distance since she goes to a UK university.
I made a thread about this before and all that anyone tells me is that I'm being cucked or cheated on and that this is an excuse to leave me so on and so on.
>>746176297
7th guy.
I realize that, but on the other hand I am conflicted. This feels like a big issue to me, but if it's not preventing me from doing my job in a general sense, then is it really a big deal in the first place? There's other anons right in this very thread who have way worse issues than I do, I don't feel like going to a therapist over something so minor, objectively speaking, is worth it.
It does weigh on my mind, but maybe it's small enough that ignoring it will make me forget about it.
>>746178362
Pieces of fucking shit. Press charges and make sure those assholes regret it.
Jumping people is one thing. Betraying people is far worse. Don't let this slip just because they were your friends, anon.
You faggots are really lucky the mods are cancerous cunts now and gorebombing is now a bannable offense on /b/.
>>746178890
y u mad tho
To be honest Ive been really lonely lately. I dont have any friends let alone a girlfriend. I had a few friends before I moved across the country 5 years ago. I havent made any friends really in these 5 years. I started college a few weeks ago but havent really met anyone. I want friends and maybe even a girlfriend and to not be a loner.
>>746177923
i think it would be a little bit petty of my friends to get mad at me for trying to lose my virginity, but my friends in total. it was just really fucking exhausting going through highschool being slightly less than average and getting less than 0 girls, especially when you tell anyone "i cant get girls because im not thin" and everyone shits on your because "oh, so and so got a girl friend, and hes 180lbs". like, nigga, im fucking 220lbs, until pretty recently no job no car, and no actual experience with girls. it doesnt fucking help i spent whatever 2 and a half years on here learning to be a bitter virgin who thinks all girls are "total sluts who just milk dicks for money" and "why would i be friends with a girl for anything but pussy, i can get everything else i need at a better quality from my dude friends"
>>746156075
Finally saw a psych, almost a decade after deploying to Afghanistan. Psych believes I am bipolar and have PTSD.
>>746178952
>implying you have trolled me
lurk moar and kill yourself cancer
>>746178230
*hugs you gently*
Can you take an Advil or some aspirin for that, Anon?
>>746178245
Are you afraid of being hurt?
I'm far from the best. Sometimes I try to do good things.
>>746178260
Discord doesn't do video calls. At least, not that I know of. But it does do voice calls, yes. Good luck, Anon. I hope you can make it work.
>>746178327
But you do mean something, Z. You mean something to me. I want you to feel better, and to succeed. I want to see you improve.
Maybe you'll be able to find a girl who wants to help you to get better.
But don't resign yourself to eternal loneliness. You'll never get anywhere if you believe that you'll never get anywhere.
>>746178362
Damn. That's awful. Do you know why they did that? Maybe others will side with you against them.
>>746178440
Sleeping will make it easier.
>>746178493
Hm. It sounds like she wanted you to change to suit her. And then she thought you didn't pay enough attention to her?
Weird. What do you think of all this, Anon? What's your impression of her?
>>746178529
It can certainly be a big deal if it puts you in fear of death or misery. Don't compare yourself to other anons. Your problems matter just as much to me as theirs do.
If it bothers you enough, don't stop yourself from going to a therapist. Do you think you really can handle it on your own?
>>746178890
Oh well.
>>746178959
It took me five years to start making friends after I last moved, Anon. You may need to be more aggressive about getting to know people. They won't just fall on you. Seek out people who seem interesting. Ask to study with people after class.
>>746179216
>being buttrustled enough to threaten gorebombing
>"I'm not mad"
>>746178890
When did it change? I haven’t browsed here in awhile and was suprised to see how different it was.
>>746179290
yea sleeping will im sure...or cumming...but...idk
>>746178890
>a bunch of people are having meaningful conversations on /my/ board
>REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>746179290
Why would anyone ever choose me though....I offer nothing....I'm like a puzzle that's missing half the pieces. Nobody would want that....if given the chance they would go for one they could actually finish
>>746179290
I hate people leaving. Makes me sad, so now I just don't get attached so that doesn't happen.
>>746179529
anon, the best place to start building is from the ground up. if you think you have boring/no hobbies, take one up. working out is a great place to start considering it improves you health/attractiveness, plus its easy to make friends at the gym if you need someone to spot you. in my experience, most people at gyms are really helpful and encouraging.
>>746179529
Different anon.
Everyone. Every single person on this planet is an unfinished puzzle. Everyone we meet, we're swapping puzzle pieces for the ones that fit in the empty spaces. None of us are complete, but the people around us, complete us.
>>746179156
1st step is to get off 4chan. 4chan will not make you a better person. /b/, /pol/, and /r9k/ will do nothing but make you worse.
Then, pursue women. Get to know girls, and ask them out. Getting a job will help.
>>746179212
Can you get those confirmed by another doctor? What can you do about them?
>>746179261
Is it?
>>746179340
Choose one.
Flip a coin.
Good luck.
>>746179529
Stop telling yourself that. You don't know what they want, or why. You're projecting what you expect them to want onto them, and that's almost cruel. Stop it. You're a good person, Z. But you need to start believing it.
>>746179594
It's hard, but it's something you need to learn to deal with. It can't always be avoided. The happiness and satisfaction gained from getting close to people should balance it out in the long run, if you really commit to them.
Am I a bad person? I'm told I'm not, but every day I hate myself more and more, and I don't know what to do anymore.
>>746179290
I think she's a nag but at the same time I did always say no sorry I can't talk otp... Like all the time and I would never message her sometimes and just sleep all day
>>746179529
You offer more than you know, anon. And besides that, you can always work towards self improvement. You haven't reached your full potential, not even close. Establish goals and work towards them. If you're overweight, drop some pounds. If you're not well read, get a library card and work at it. Never stop trying to be the best version of yourself, because when you stop, you fail. And when you fail, get right back up and work twice as hard as it. As many times as it takes.
>>746179801
I hate going to gyms though, especially on base. I end up feeling weak because I can't do anything remotely close to what everyone else can and I feel like I'm being judged.....
>>746179350
>meaningful conversations
>larping and avatarfagging
pick one
>>746179960
>>>746179290
>I think she's a nag but at the same time I did always say no sorry I can't talk otp... Like all the time and I would never message her sometimes and just sleep all day
Gf problems anon btw
>>746176297
I'm sure explaining wouldn't hurt. I get sad quite a bit, but it is okay. I love my family and I have friends, so it can't be all that bad. A loving dog, too.
>>746180124
Oh, and I was that poster. I forgot my totoro picture
>>746179885
V.A. doctor, so it would mean getting disability depending on how they estimate the severity. Can get up to 50% which would help a lot with bills. But yes, a second opinion would be nice. Can't afford anything outside the V.A. though.
>>746179885
I...wish others saw what you see in me....I wish I could see it too but....all these years of just being broken down time and time again....all the people I trusted my heart to only to have it returned in a million pieces....
>>746179853
Seems like people just take pieces of me and leave....
>>746180020
What's wrong with avatars? I can't expect someone to know which convorsation I'm continuing? You sound like you don't belong here.
