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Working in retail horror stories? I worked in retail for about

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

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Working in retail horror stories?

I worked in retail for about 1.5 years, Best Buy to be precise, and it was terrible. I was hoping to see some stories of fellow anons experiences with working retail. Anyone interested? The first story that comes to my mind isn't that great, but gives you an idea of the assholes you deal with on a daily basis.

> Get stuck as a cashier for a shift because that department had very high turnover
> Man and woman come to check out wearing clothes that look like they're cosplaying Assassin's Creed
> I greet them by saying "Hey, guys"
> The dude gets offended and asks if I think his girlfriend is a guy
> I say no and he continues to question if I see two men in front of me instead of this asshole and his girlfriend
> I explain saying "Hey guys" is an informal greeting
> He says I can't be informal at work and demands I apologize to his girlfriend
> I look at his girlfriend who is sporting a confused yet agreeing facial expression
> I apologize (beta mode engaged) and ring them out

Like I said, not much of a story, but I was hoping to read some others. I'm happy to say I have a much better and higher-paying job now for nearly 2 years. Retail sucks.
>>
that kids more beta than you
>>
bump
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Also, I forgot to mention that after I quit my job my former female manager started texting me and we ending up fucking a bunch of times. I fisted her too. Complete whore haha probably the only semi-decent thing to come out of the whole mess.
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>>692246650
Bump, got one for you need type to type
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>>692246650
I actually got hired at best buy to work in the computer department. but after they told me about the quota and having to care more about selling computers than helping people, i never went to get the drug test and just disappeared from their radar for good.
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>>692246916

At the time I had a car payment, student loans, rent, and other expenses and I was making like $400 every two weeks. So I apologized so as to not make a huge deal of it at work and potentially loose my job. I regret being nice after that faggot gave me a hard time to this day.
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>>692246650

Worked in an ice cream store when I was still in college. I really can't imagine a more retarded clientele.

>What does the vanilla taste like?

I swear to you I got this question at least once a day. Still fucking boggles the mind how someone could let this sentence slip out of their dumbshit mouth.
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>>692247160
Okay, so in about 2008 I worked at Kohl's. One morning a lady came in trying to return a pile of shirts and pants and we turned her down. This happened shortly after opening at 8 (back then it wasn't the return whatever the fuck you want policy that it is now)
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>>692246650
I never worked retail but I like going into ice cream shoppes and asking what the vanilla tastes like
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>>692247649
>What does the vanilla taste like?
Seriously? What country? I can not imagine anyone in America not knowing what vanilla taste like
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>>692247225

Good for you. Avoid retail at all costs. Did you end up getting a better job? God, I remember having to go in at 5:00 p.m. Thanksgiving night for 12 hours for early black friday. Fuck that place.
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>>692247651
Continued
So she runs away from cs in a huff and we assume she left the store and was going to call back and raise hell. Well she didn't, instead we get a bunch of complaints about a raunchy smell in the dressing rooms. We go over and one stall was locked, and it smelled so aweful.
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>>692247649
I worked at Poundworld and the amount of customers I wanted to punch in the face for asking how much something costs is unbelievable.
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>>692247649

Any customer-facing position puts you in direct fire of complete idiots every shift. I honestly wouldn't know how to answer the "vanilla" question. It tastes like it fucking tastes!
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>>692248032

America. California. Hipster Bay Area college town full of liberal baby boomers. Maybe they were expecting me to say "organic." I really don't know.
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>>692246650
Just this morning I had a lady want to return a lawn mower because she said there was oil in the oil filter.
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It was last year and I was working for a big grocery store called marianos. That day, I worked as the guy collecting the carts from the parking lot. A lady pulls up to the disabled parking and parks knowing that a fucking cart is blocking her way so she could full Park the car. All my Co workers walked up to her and offered to help but she yelled saying she's fine ( old folks are cranky as fuck). My Co workers didn't tell me about this old bitches behavior and they stood behind a glass door to see me get humiliated. I walk up to this old bitch and she yells at me for trying to help her old "I've fallen and I can't get up" face ass. I go back inside to witness my Co workers laughing there ass off. Literally the worst job you can ever take and the pay was $8.80.
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>>692248462

Sauce
>>
>work at a game store
>mtg tournament
>legacy, for those who know formats, so mostly decent folks with disposable income and social skills
>round two
>someone has pissed all over the bathroom floor
>nobody noticed, everyone walked in it and spread it around
>mfw I don't have to clean it up
>mfw I don't have reaction images on new computer yet

Seriously, though, fuck that guy.

also

>working over a weekend, like I do every weekend
>boss is away at a big event, as usual
>some chick comes in with her bf, they play a game at our tables all day
>don't give a fuck, they buy like a case of soda between them and the store was dead anyways
>don't bother to check women's bathroom at end of day, since there was literally one woman in
>two days later, boss comes back
>apparently, chick "died out her ass in one of the toilets"
>still didn't have to clean it, no fucks given

I have a couple more stories. My boss can be a huge bitch sometimes, but it's funny when directed at someone else.
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>>692248124
Continued
I grab a broom and reach over the door and swing it at the latch and after a few tries it releases. There is a pile of clothes piled up, yes, the very ones she tried to return, and they looked wet, when I poked around and pushed them with the broom, it became obvious that she had shit and pissed on most of them and wiped with the rest. I about puked and got the fuck out. Our poor supervisor had to clean it up. Still grosses me out to think about the god mode spite that went into that. She damned the roughly $200 worth just for revenge.
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>work at market
>people come to my register
>ask for manager
>manager comes to listen to them
>they complain that the vegetables are too wet
>spend 15 minutes explaining why the vegetables are wet to idiots
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>>692248892
Lord of the Rings movie, can't tell which one
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>>692246650
That's why I always lead with "how are you folks". It's gender neutral and no SJWs can go nutty about it.

Backstory for my greentext- I work at target mobile and sell carrier phones, but fraud is high and drug addicts come in a lot
>me working
>an older guy and a lady come up to the counter
>the guy says very quickly he wants to buy an iPhone
>his speech indicated mental disability or drug use
>I panic and start asking what kind
>we usually say we're out of stock with these guys but I was an idiot
>he says which one he wants and I tell him the cost of it and the plan
>he starts bullying the lady with him for money
>I get a phone and run his credit with the first carrier
>$500 deposit required
>he ain't having that
>he's practically drooling over my shoulder, standing inches away
>i start getting more nervous because he gets loud with his lady about the money
>about two seconds away from calling security because I'm scared of this guy
>tell him I can't sell him a phone and he needs to go to a carrier store
>still way too close asking for an explanation
>gets mad and leaves
>I'm fucking shaking and have to take five
He came back a few minutes later but I stayed behind the counter and told him in no uncertain terms he wouldn't get one from me.
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>>692246650
Nah you're not beta for doing your job. A kiss-assy apology isn't a big deal in the long run; it's all about the money. That faggot got off on belittling someone who couldn't do anything about it, just shows how sad of a life he must have. Probably one of those losers who posts on /b/ or something. Fucking faggot...
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>>692247313
don't bro nothing else you could've done, if you had've arched up then management would've taken the customers side. you did the perfect right thing, that guy is a wankstain.
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>>692249118
Do entitled cunts like her even understand that employees aren't in control of coorperate?
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Work at pet supply store. Hasidic Jew comes in wants 100 feeder goldfish (at 15 cents each) individually bagged.
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All I'm gonna say is that I've worked at a walgreens for 5 years. 4 in photo and 1 as a manager.
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>>692249302
"If you don't want wet veggies you don't have to buy them, but I'll let coorperate know about your complaint. Unfortunately I have no control over biology."
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>Working at the ol' dirty don's
>Regular shift of wanting to off myself as per usual
>Some tourist bus rolls in
>Seniors everywhere
>I mean everywhere
>Cooking them burgers and mcniggets
>Co-worker bursts in
>"I DO NOT GET PAYED ENOUGH FOR THIS SHIT"
>oooooothisgunnabegood.jpg
>Women's bathroom stall completely covered in diarrhea
>no fucking way
>Old lady totally shit all over the floor and toilet and continued to go back into restaurant lobby like nothing happened
>Other co-worker cleans it up for crew meal
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>>692248947
Good story sir! Here is a reaction for your troubles!
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>>692249314
Kek
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>>692250634

One today:
Q: What size do your crickets come in?
A: Small medium and large.
Q: Ok what size are medium?
A: between a small and a large.
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>>692248892
Fucking Ariel rebel dude
Short chick brown butthole
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>get hired at Family Dollar after mass walk out all over city
>hired on basis I'll pass a drug and background check
>live in state where they can only check 7 years back
>first week, manager quits
>interim manager is dumb
>first night, store is totalled at -$1500
>she quits
>next day the fire me though the mail
>used out of state background check to loophole fire me
>was only other employee at store

Fuck you Family Dollar.
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>>692246650
>Implying retail is bad compared to foodservice
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>>692250930
Crew meal?
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>>692251217

Funny you should say that because at the same time I worked at Best Buy I also was a barback at a local restaurant. Both were awful jobs. It was humiliating work, honestly.
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I work at a gas station on the western side of North Dakota, we got meth heads , drunks, blacks, lesbians, etc.

The worst customers:
Middle Aged white guys and lesbians
Never ever ever offer a lesbian a bag fellow anons, even if she is getting 10 monster energy drinks do not offer a bag they will get so fucking triggered
Ask me anything
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>>692247016
Winrar
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>>692251394
a crew meal is a complimentary meal given to mcdonald employees for doing over par work
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>>692247649

you don't just give them a sample to shut their fat mouths up?
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>work at movie theater
>we have alot of hispanic customers
>this particular hispanic doesnt know english
>takes something i said the wrong way
>he thought I insulted him
>tiny mexican guy tries to fight me over counter
>other concessionists are laughing at him
>i call manager bc i aint trying to get fired for fighting with this small angry man
>he starts cussing at us in spanish and getting more angry bc he cant jump counter
>nerdy manager limps (he has bowed legs) out to lobby to calm him down
>we laugh bc its funny
>mexican dudes white gf is trying to calm him down, basically taking his punches
>manager calms him down and gives him something free
>the day is saved
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>>692251542
Is it true if you don't ask me if I pumped fuel I can leave without paying?
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>>692251518
Not all food service is terrible. I work at McCallisters and the people are pretty positive. Some customers are stupid, but if you keep in a mindset of 'I'm makin money' then you're aight.
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>>692251045

"I've been feeding my cat dog food for 3 months...is my cat going to die?
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>>692251542
Funniest triggering of dyke?
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I used to work in a high end retail store as a janitor and I have a lot of horror stories.

Every Wednesday one bathroom stall would be covered in shit. From the floor and all the way up the wall. I mean the stall would be covered in fecal matter.

Multiple backed up toilets from flushed tampons.

Extremely snobby costumers with the I'm better then you mind set.

One old dude who shit in one of the changing rooms on top of nearly 5k in suits.

I don't think I mentioned the sheer amount of shit that we had to deal with.

I could go on and on about that one store alone.
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>Working in retail
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>>692251542

whats up with the bag?
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>work at Walmart
>cart pusher because they fucked me over and lied about a stocker job since they were opening a new store and desperately needed anyone who applied
>co-workers rarely show up to their shift
>get stuck doing all the carts most evenings
>very popular store, opened in an area with no walmarts anywhere close
>constantly get pulled in to door greet as well
>get pulled in on one night where there are no other cart guys and nobody to at least try to get carts while I'm door greeting
>decide that the stress from covering for a bunch of lazy cunts isn't worth the pay
>clock out, don't talk to anyone, and just leave and never come back
>a week later, it's Black Friday and I decide to pay them a visit just for fun
>practically no carts inside the store, a lot of angry customers and a single fat CSM is out slowly pushing carts in

Now I do accounts receivable shit for a small mom and pop, which is a beast of its own, but I don't get home at midnight wanting to kill myself so that's a plus.
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>>692251822
Fuel is pre pay in the region I live in, although We do have the power to activate pumps, primarily for testing purposes. The only way to pay outside is to use a debit/credit card, the pumps will NOT work if you don't slide your card in first, so many dumb fucking people act stupid like it isn't pre pay and bitch about the pumps, however I rarely have problems showing people how to use them, the real problem is when I'm the only one working and there are customers in the store, in that scenario I cannot help those outside.
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>>692252109

I worked at borders for a bunch of years, and the crazy places people would shit in the store astounded me. In the elevator, on the countertop in the mens room, in the business section, on the floor in the handicap stall and the taking the shit and drawing a happy face on the wall....
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>>692251542
Trigger story
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Not a retail job but i work as a sushi chef and this couple walks in and eat $60 worth of food and walks out without paying and when i confronted them they said they didnt feel like it was right to pay because the service was bad. The "bad service" was basically us not letting them take leftovers home after they ordered 10+ rolls and ate nothing. Even though it clearly states on the menu that we do not let leftovers be taken home.
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>>692251518
I work a cashier job and a burger job
The cashier job is easy as fuck and relaxing
The burger job is shitty, hard work and they want me available all the time but only give me like one day a week so I'm about to quit
Fucking females ruining everything
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>>692252610

Or they'd sit in the pleather comfy chairs and just piss into them.
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>>692252819
I wouldn't have payed either lol
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>>692248462
I think it might just be a stupid way for people to suggest a taste test without really asking for it. I would probably say "why not try for yourself?" since I know most places like that tend to offer samples.

Or they're just retarded. I don't know.
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not retail but story
>be chef
>colleague and i in prank war
>grab his knives after work from kitchen without anyone noticing
>make molds of his knives
>get agar agar powder and make perfect clones
>get to work extra early to put his knife roll back without real knives where it was
>his face when all his knives are now jelly
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>>692246650
Holy shit OP, you've been working at best buy for 15 years? Are you at least like.. a store manager or something?
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>>692252819

I can't even express the level of rage I'd get if I was told I couldn't take home food I just bought. Seriously, how many times per hour are the cops there because someone is flipping their shit?
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>>692253359

That's awesome
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>>692248056
Kinda, I was still in college so I just went back and found a part time job as a academic advisor. I like helping people so it's cool in that aspect but it's not enough hours to be livable. I'm looking into getting evolved with a start up company because all these white collar desk jobs feel like they'll suck my soul away
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>>692253369
damn youre retarded...
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Working in a dollar store you get to witness the lowest parasites of society come in. A lot of them are women and women love using the bathroom if one appears 30ft within their fucken radar.
Women are disgusting, always. Most unpotty trained fucks ever. Women's bathroom is always unnecessarily disgusting. Hope you never have to walk into one because the shit they do never makes sense.
>pic related
The bucket they pooped in was three feet from the fucken toilet.
>fuckenwhy.jpeg
Tossed the poop bucket in the dumpster for the dumpster divers to find their prize.
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>>692246650
Best Buy is fucking toxic. But im inventory, so i dont have a name tag, so when i piss customers off, i just tell them my name is Mark. When they ask for a last name i tell them Fischbach.
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>>692253429

Was it a buffet?
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>>692252819

huh? why don't you let customers take home leftovers? or is it a buffet kind of place?
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>>692246650
>be cashier at clothing store
>have social anxiety
>act awkward during every transaction
>can't keep a straight face
>no dexterity, visually uncoordinated

I know I'm not the only nervousfag here
>>
When I worked at Wal-Mart in 2003 when I was 18 someone has a miscarriage in a women's room toilet, I shit you not, and all the manager's refused to clean it. They told me to do it (I was a cashier) but told me they were out of latex gloves. I walked out on the spot.
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>>692253174
>>692253429
>>692253623
Yeah forgot to mention it was a buffet and they thought they could abuse the all you can eat thing by ordering a shit ton and eating a coupek of pieces and wanting to take the rest home with them>>692253654
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>>692248652
I understand the question. Different brands taste different. And French vanilla isn't the same as creamy vanilla etc.
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>>692253174
>>692253429
>>692253623
Yeah forgot to mention it was a buffet and they thought they could abuse the all you can eat thing by ordering a shit ton and eating a coupek of pieces and wanting to take the rest home with them
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>>692252046
> fat lesbian dyke with half black child comes in
> she gets like 8 monsters, some chips, and a bunch of other shit
> asks if she would like a bag
> she looks at me like I just said she was fat
> "I don't need no fucking bag"
> she then gathers up all her shit and tackles through the door
> mfw all the employees in the store always ask her that and trigger the fuck out of her
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>>692253597
hahahah wtf
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>>692253687

I got into retail in the first place to try to get over my social phobia bullshit.
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>>692251784
>mfw I'm Mexican, short, and have a white gf

Fuckity...
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>>692253687
im like that, and thats mainly the reason why i never apply for cashier type jobs
>>
Don't EVER work in retail. Ever. Not even as a manager. Just don't do it. Work in a fucking factory or shoveling shit at a farm before retail. Even if your a teen who needs experience, you don't need that kind of fucking experience.
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>>692254101
are you a hothead too?
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>>692253744
I call bullshit. They would have "store use" some off the shelf.
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>>692254006
hahahaha
>>
Semi-related to topic

I was in Walmart looking for something specific I can't remember but it's an item you don't buy often and can't ever remember where it's at in stores. So I ask the first blue vest I see 'excuse me miss where can I find this item?" This bitch looked up at me like I was her kid and I couldn't find my socks again. She clearly only took this job because her parole officer made her. She asked "WHAT?" Just one word, what? I was silent I've never been talked to like that as a paying customer. I repeated politely I'm looking for this item. She said nothing just started walking to the end of the aisle. She stopped abruptly and dropped her hands against her thighs doing that fucking leg slap thing. She found where the item was supposed to be but it was empty. I asked well would there be any in the back? Wrong fucking question she started bitching about how she was going to have to take apart a full pallet because they're buried under a thousand boxes and she's already behind and blah blah menstrual cramp fml

Anyway I stood my ground and she brought me the item I wanted. When cashing out by registers I saw there was a hundred more on the wall by gum and sodas

I think it was beef jerky but that's irrelevant
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>>692246650

>used to sell fireworks for july 4th
>the shitty type that sparks and does absolutely nothing
>did it because my friend told me that you "have to see the people that buy fireworks"
>he was right.
>how many poor fucks (white, black, brown, you name it) with a dozen kids, no clothes, no shoes
>spend hundreds of dollars on shit you'd probably have a better time lighting a toilet paper roll
>we had a stupid one called, "purple rain"
>do you know how many fuckers kept talking about that stupid ass prince song?
>btw, for dealing with ridiculous shit, i made $10k the week of july 4th.
>>
>>692249583
Wait did you just call me a "folk"? I do not identify as human you fucking cispig, I am aardvarkkin, GET YOUR MANAGER
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>>692251845
will probably go blind and die if she keeps kitty on that diet.
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>>692254025
You ever get over it?
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>>692249583
>target mobile
So you come in late, leave early and get paid to give no fucks as long as nothing gets stolen out of the lockup?
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>>692254472

That's what I told her. No taurine in dog food. Good job anon!
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>>692254238
Far from it actually, I noticed after lifting I was slightly more irritable but no one's ever called me short tempered
>>
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>>692248947
>"died out her ass"
Fucking kek
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>>692251045
I fucking hated bagging crickets those disgusting fucking things
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>>692254398

>why the fuck do people want to shove their fingers into the tube holes that are covered over by paper?

>why the fuck do you bring a lit cigarette into a tent of fireworks? you fucking dolt

>moms. suburban milfs. one lady bought a $200 package for her kids. actually, that was really nice of her. what got me was she called it, "the motherload." when she said it, i just visualized her getting a facial and calling it "the motherload..."
>>
>>692254537

Kind of. I still have social phobia, but not nearly as bad as before. However, i feel like every day at work sucks and I drink myself into oblivion when I get home.
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>>692254181
Not all retail is bad. I worked in a private community store. Was nice. Mostly played on the computer since like 5 people came in per day. Rich white people. Never any trouble.
Also worked a job with janitorial responsibilities, in a building filled with more rich white people. The bathrooms in common areas were heavily used but always still spotless at the end of the day.
Can't stand to be around 90% of them but I never had to deal with people shitting all over the place or being violent.
>>
>>692246650
Well I WANTED to post a story but my nigger phone just fucked it up.
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>>692252719
Apparently my phone is retarded and didn't post my whole green text....
Ill try again
> Unstable looking rednecks who work on roofing come in
> one of them asks me to come over to where he is at, the soda machine shit
> line of customers forming
> I walk over to him
> he is sipping soda from his 44oz
> he then dumps it out, the whole thing
> "this tastes like shit" he exclaims as his eyes bulge out and his neck awkwardly bends and his balance becomes more awkward
> tell I'm ill go to the back
> I go to the back and don't see his fucking Mountain Dew shit
> run back straight to the register and ring up a bunch of customers
> I then go back to roofing guys and tell them we are out because of the assistant manager not ordering enough for the week
> they just get regular maintain dew and that's that
> one of the pissed off customers in line earlier snuck back in and sprinted out like a faggor with a Gatorade
> Air Force guy lays for the stolen garorade
I can also tell you of the lemon man if you would like
>>
>be chef
> at work one day and old fat bitch starts making a fuss out front about being highly allergic to gluten and complains how just because of that how dare they suggest she not get any of the items containing wheat
>mfw she says she can eat any type of wheat product just not those with gluten
>turns on bitch was just one of those people that hear a health buzzword and trend diet without knowing anything
>>
>>692254537
Fuck no, I trained up on every position I could to avoid cashiering or working sales floor during hours.
>>
>Work at Gabriel Brothers
>After Christmas
>All of the Christmas items in domestics get marked down before they're actually marked down in the system
>Customers get pissed off when I tell them I can't do anything about the price
One guy, in particular, was awful. He's an old man, has a "JUST" hairstyle, twitchy eye, looks like a bum. I call him the IED, because whenever he comes in, he fucking goes off on somebody, no matter what. That time it was me.
>Brings a shit ton of stuff up
Now, nobody told me about the Christmas items getting fucked up, I went into it blind.
>Start ringing him up
>He says something to the effect of "WHAT?"
>Before I can get a word out, he starts screaming and spitting in my face
>"WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS HORSESHIT? WHY THE FUCK ISNT THIS THE PRICE LISTED?"
>Start to realize what's gone wrong
Now, normally I can handle these situations pretty well, but this was something else.
>"Sir, these items aren't marked down in our system. If it were one or two items I could probably mark them down, but I can't with this many."
>"I DONT GIVE A SHIT, I WANT THEM FOR THE LOWER PRICE."
>I had a fucking line of people behind me, everyone is looking my way
>My manager comes by
>She starts yelling back at this guy and basically just called him a fucking idiot for yelling at me
At this point I'm just fucking laughing.
>He looks at me with a nasty glare
>I look back at him with a smile and a wink
>He goes nuts
>Starts throwing shit everywhere, pounding his fist on the table, and just looking like he was gonna assault me
>Tell him "If I were out of work right now I'd knock your fucking ass to the ground."
>Right in front of my manager
>She laughs as I say that
>The guy basically just walks out, yelling obscenities the entire way
>The next customer up just says to me in a sweet tone "Don't feel too bad, he does this everywhere he goes. I saw him yesterday up at the mall doing the same thing, and they kicked him out."
So yeah, that's the IED story.
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>>692253597

Maybe the toilet stalls were occupied and they couldn't wait.
>>
>>692255021

Cleaning the dead crickets when we get like 3000 of each every Friday sucks so very much.
>>
ITT: betafags who don't know/understand that they are getting paid actual money (and that money is earned, not given) to do a job.
>>
>>692253536
>damn your retarded....

fixed that for you
>>
>>692255303
Single bathroom single toilet door locks behind you, no stalls. They were inside the bathroom and shit in a fucken bucket
>>
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>>692251127
>Background check to work at Family Dollar
>>
>>692252517
Are you from coquitlam?
>>
>>692254359
greentext that shit
fuck I hate summer
>>
>>692255524
No.
>>
>>692246650
Hey will you buy me an HDMI cable?
>>
>>692248438
I took ur mum to poundworld
>>
>>692251127
What did they find in your background to fire you for? I mean, it's Family Dollar. Do they want a top secret security clearance or what?
>>
>>692254430

Folks? Do you take us for country bumpkins?? How dare you, never been so insulted
>>
>>692254796
good one anon, dont live up to bad stereotypes
>>
>>692255172
>Lemon man

Go on
>>
>>692253359
haha good oen
>>
yesterday i was working box office and this damn ghetto rat with her 8 kids started fighting with me over a damn dollar. I battled with her for a good 10 minutes, telling her she was in the wrong and the best thing she could do was insult me. I give the loud bitch her dollar just to shut her ass up and the other loud black people defending her.
Later, when I went to get cashed out, i was a dollar short bc of that nasty piece of trash.
In my years of working in retail, black people have always been the worst. The second are old white people.
>>
"IS IT A CHIP READER OR DO I SWIPE????"
>>
>>692246650
I work at a pizza place, I tell customers to fuck off all the time. Sorry you had to work for a massive soulless corporation.
>>
>>692255172
does the lemon man steal lemons?
>>
>>692251827
>aight

This is why you work in food service
>>
>>692255522

I got drug tested and background checked to work as a fucking doorman.

Less than a year later I was acting manager overnights and widely regarding as critical and the best employee, since apart from being competent I could fix a bunch of shit that normally required service calls (e.g. stuck elevators with people trapped).

They wanted to drug test me again, and I failed it on purpose to teach them a lesson about drug testing people for non-safety-critical jobs like holding a fucking door open.
>>
Not retail, but it still was a weird situation.
>Be me
>work at an ice rink
>distributing rentals for learn to skate kids
>clueless father walks in with kid for first time
>does not know child's shoe size
>puts child on counter and begins removing her shoe to check her shoe size
>line is growing behind him
>lessons start in a few minutes and lots of kids still don't have skates
>ask next clueless dad to come get skates
>first clueless dad is upset
>insinuates that I should be the one checking his kids shoe size, and I shouldn't be skipping over him, and how rude I am
>apologize, but worry, because line is getting long and shitty hockey boss will come by and yell at me
>get shoe size and give clueless dad the skates
>clueless dad is bewildered
>clueless dad claims that it is my responsibility to tie his child's skates
>other clueless dads and not clueless moms look at him like he has 2 heads
>clueless dad demands I tie his child's skates, while at least 6 kids haven't gotten skates and the lessons have started
>I tie the kids skates and boss finally shows up and starts distributing skates
>I ask clueless dad if he would like me to show him how to tie skates for the future, mention that I often leave a tied skate on the counter, so parents can use it as a guide
>clueless dad explains to me that he isn't paying (whatever the price is for the lessons, from my understanding, it's reasonable) for 6 weeks of lessons so he can tie his own kids skates
>spends next hour while his kid is in a lesson explaining to me why skiing is just like skating, except harder because it's "3D" and that'd he'd be a pro from the start and then starts flirting with me
>clueless dad goes on public session with child
>falls and bangs his head on the wall almost immediately
>threatens to sue rink
>I have to clean up his blood
I hated that job. It was never the kids that were the problem. It was always the parents. I have more if anyone is interested.
>>
>>692255350
That shit stinks so Fucking bad.
>>
>>692255355
Have you ever worked retail?
>>
"$19.87? That was a great year! Har Har Har!
>>
>>692255985
It's a valid question.
>>
>>692256249

Less valid when you have to answer the same question 100 times every day.
>>
>>692255507

Maybe they had a phobia about sitting on toilet seat
>>
>>692256230
There's no price listed I guess it's free! HA!
>>
holy shit what a faggot
>>
Does this have tap?
Yeah?
*BEATS THE FUCK OUT OF DEBIT MACHINE WITH CARD*
I DONT GET IT WHY WONT IT WORK
>>
>>692246650
>work at gamestop as a manager
>customer comes in, looking like one of you faggots
>picks up pokemon OR and a few other 3DS games
>get all his games together
>he looks through them while breathing like a fucking gorilla through his mouth
>tells me one of the inserts is missing in the Omega Ruby case
>calmly explain to him that the previous owner must have taken it out and that's the risk you take when you buy games used like that
>he goes full on rage mode, damn near yelling about how he held GameStop to a higher quality than selling incomplete products
>tell him to leave after a few more minutes of his shit
>knows over game bins and signs on his way out
God I fucking hate people. Have more if anyone is interested.
>>
>>692256451
"Haha $4.20!"
>>
>>692248892
Tom Cruise, The Last Samurai.

Thank me later.
>>
>>692255522
i worked at a dollar tree and they did background checks. trust me, you really really want them to.

>we hired a new cashier
>she was nice middle aged woman
>showed up on time, did a good job
>finally someone who doesn't suck
>she doesn't show one day, ask store manager whats up
>fired her for copying customer credit card numbers when they handed them to her for manual input

background check came back a few days later, history of credit fraud and identity theft.
>>
>>692255985
I've been to several stores that have the chip reader devices the system isn't set up to do the chip read
>>
*scans item* nothing comes up.
"Must be free! Har Har HAR!
>>
>>692256168

only if you show your tits.
>>
>>692247016
Former female? Ha, gay.
>>
>>692252819
You don't let people take home the food they paid for but didn't finish?
>>
>>692256227
Fucking A right I have. I also understand that when a company hires me to do a job, I just handle my business and dont pretend that they (the company, or customer) owes me anything before working.

Yes, there are times where working ANY job sucks, but being a whiney millenial bitch about it is really fucking annoying. So what if somebody snaps on you, it isn't like they are taking your money or your personal time. Man up, put on a smile, and do your JOB.
>>
>>692256680
Do these people just stand there wait for her to write down their info and just not realize? I mean how the fuck?
>>
I've got some shitty fast-food stories (also some funny ones, as I've seen a few others post)

>be me
>GM always puts me in window because im the best in the store at it
>dead of winter
>knuckles cracking because of cold
>fuck head comes through drive-through
>fuck head orders food
>"is the order on your screen correct?" Is mandatory to ask customers
>fuckhead gets to my window
>i give him food
>"this isnt right"
>oh shit here we go
>"sorry about that sir, we'll get it fixed"
>have grill team make something else for this douche
>trying to keep him occupied with conversation in the mean time
>in the most polite tone i could muster i say
>"so we can make sure this never happens again, just make sure you check the screen after your order is taken to be sure that everything is correct"
>he's visibly pissed
>can't accept responsibility for his own fuck up
>"no no no, IM NOT THE ONE WHO WORKS AT MCDONALDS"

The thought of this douche still pisses me off to this day. GM wanted to make me a manager, but i ended up leaving the week of my review. Honestly couldnt do it anymore, that job killed me.
>>
>>692256168
>I have more if anyone is interested.
Go for it ice rink chick
>>
>>692256751
my father does this every time, and it bothers me the person shopping with him
>>
>>692256974
That's going to be a no. Sorry.
>>
worked at the same retail store for about 5 years now. different locations but same company. any way new store heard about this story from my manager.

>customer came in and wanted to buy a purse
>no sign up for price, but someone had left a "buy one get one" sign topper near them
>She proceeds to yell at the cashier she wants them for the price on the sign.
>calls my manager who comes out to explain that its not a sign but a topper and even though they arent buy one get one free that shes going to honor it
>customer enters ultimate bitch mode. "I DIDNT SAY BUY ONE GET ONE FREE!!" I just want what the sign says
>Manager gets confused by this and asks her to clarify
>customer gets all red and angry and says i dont want them free i want what the sign says!
>manager offers her them for buy one get one free again and says that what the sign says
>the customer gets to the point where shes yelling loud enough for the whole store to hear now that she doesn want one free, she wants what the sign says, and she doesnt want an explanation.
>Manager confused by this tells her shes going to fix the sign and put the correct price up.
>Customer throws all her things on the ground and says that she cant do that. that shes going to call corporate and the police because thats illegal. Curses at everyone and leaves the store slamming our door and cracking the glass on her way out.

Ill never understand some people
>>
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Around Christmas was awful.
"YOUR NAMETAG SAYS NICK, GUESS JOLLY OL' ST. NICK HAS ARRIVED EARLY!"
>>
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>Be me
>Third year of working at a pizza joint
>Not bad, pay wasn't all that good but it was a job
>Big party comes in for buffet
>Bunch of old people with their grandchildren
>Get through the rush just fine, get assigned to clean the restroom
>Guys bathroom went as good as cleaning a guys restroom could go
>Enter girls restroom
>Instantly hit with a wall of putrid stench
>Cany find out where the smell is coming from, just assumed someone ripped ass
>Got done cleaning the toilet, now to change the garbage
>Literally almost vomit into the garbage can
>MFW someone dropped an enormous shit in the garbage can
>Come back to the kitchen and say I don't get paid enough for this
>Everyone laughs, including my boss
>Bathrooms are awful
>>
>>692256686

Explaining how to use the chip reader is making me want to slit my wrists.
>>
>Work at the old Mcdongalds
>pretty chill, just close and make like 1000+ sandwiches an hour

>Guy is known for saying he doesn't get food, namely a six nugget.
>has two kids, always orders 1 mighty meal, then comes back to get a second one.
>I come out of grill with the food, tell my friend to record me making and handing the food out.
>guy comes in saying he doesn't get the six nugget.
>I show him the video. He flips out
>starts knocking shit down, we throw him out and tell his kids it's going to be alright, give his kid the meal anyway.

>literally complete victory.
>>
>>692255699
Literally ANY felonies. I had a felony assault like 8 years prior.
>>
>>692256680
Fucken Christ, so this is the reason they're taking away the ability to manually input this shit? Wtf
>>
I work at an adult toy shop, and a man who looked in his mid-20s came in and after I greet him he rushes to the counter and asks for my name. I told him my name and said I would help him if he needed anything. I started to clean our DVDs so he would leave me alone. Manager calls in and asks if I am okay I said yes and he reminds me that 6 people are watching me and that I will be okay. As he browses around he tries to get "buddy-buddy" with me which we have to ignore and do work. He then asks about what kind of toys I use and when I get off. I tell him it's information I cannot give out and I can see he got upset. Another customer comes in so the man goes into the DVD area while I help this customer. Quickly after the customer left, the man came back and said "Does your boyfriend let you go out like that? It's like you want it to happen." I was literally wearing black pants, a black long-sleeve shirt, and a zipped up black jacket, It was freezing and our heater didn't work. I get the uneasy feeling but still ignore him. Every customer has 20 minutes of browsing so I tell him he has to leave and he tries to "pick me up." I respond to him he has to leave and he "accidentally drops an item on the counter across the room while he left. I went to pick it up. Time is getting closer to closing, which is at 12:00. and I hear police sirens. They surround my car and I am watching from the video cameras from inside. The man was hiding under my car, waiting for me to get off of work. Turns out when I went to pick up what he dropped, he rushed and hide under my car and my coworker watching me called the police but didn't want to scare me. This job has its ups and its major downs.
>>
>>692248032
I had a co-worker who, in her mid-twenties, had never had ice cream. She was not lactose intolerant, she just never got around to trying it. She is also from the American Midwest, so culture had nothing to do with it either.
>>
>>692256680

> that reminds me.
> worked at a pizza place
> manager left applicants paperwork
> read it
> woman writes about her past history that is just sketch
> then mentions she has hepatitis A on her application
> wtf!?
>>
>>692254667
Pretty much. I try not to be a lazy nigger and I help out electronics as much as possible though.
I don't get the mobile people who treat electronics like shit.
>>
>>692257598
Jesus fucking christ man
>>
>>692256168
wtf is wrong with some people, and who doesnt know their own kid's shoe size, cmon
>>
>>692257438
Slit them then Fggt. You're Bitching about something so simple like a teenage girl. I'd be fine if that was the worst shit I'd deal with all day. Kill yourself
>>
>>692257457

Just Remembered one much funnier.
>big fat black bitch from out of state comes in freaking out that "an employee stole my phone from the bathroom"
>I tell her shes nuts, tell her call the popo and they will search my (female)coworker.
>I can see this lady's phone on the back wall from here.
>police come, I tell them the phone is over there.
>She had outstanding warrants in another state
>gets arrested.
>kids crying as she gets carted off.

>literally complete victory.
>bang female coworker
>>
>>692257339
>bathrooms are awful.

Aw shit here we go, walked in to take a piss.
>guy rushes in.
>knocks the stall door.
>Fucking rips ass
>can't help but laugh.
>Go back in a few minutes later
>See a giant puddle off shit next to the seat on the fucking floor.
>vomit to boot.
>walk out say nothing
>next day it got cleaned up.

I know if I would have said anything I would have to clean up that shit. Fuck that
>>
>>692249583

Or the simple, yet effective, "welcome to ____"
>>
>>692254251
It's fucking WAL MART. They don't give a fuck.
>>
>>692257241

i promise i'm not like the clueless dad. i know my kid's skate size.
>>
>>692257820
I am the youngest girl working there, boyfriend wants me to quit it.
>>
>>692257797
oh god the best part of being an assistant manager was getting to read the application.

how the fuck do some of these people function in the real world with no ability to read, write, or do math?
>>
>>692257201
Funny story time

>be me
>working back booth this time
>customer comes through
>looking at his phone, not really paying attention
>watch his back window roll down
>wtf?
>customer then proceeds to slam his head into his closed front window
>visibly embarrased as he rolls down the right window this time
>"i bet that'll give the crew some laughs"

Im honestly glad he was cool about it, because i laughed my ass off after it happened. Pretty great guy, i enjoyed helping out customers like him. Tossing the recipt even though im required to give it to them, etc. Petty shit like that, but they made my job easier so i tried to hook them up as best i could.
>>
>>692255906
>>692256017
>Older tall white guy comes in to get coffee all the time
> One day we don't have anymore lemon juice packets
> He looses his shit
> older co worker tells him we are out
> he turns to me
> ANON OPEN THESE CABINET DOORS AND LOOK FOR ME
> I systematically go through every fucking cabinet door where all condiments are
> he starts shaking his head
>" I know there are fucking here you liars"
> he comes in again next day
> still no lemon juice for his coffee
> Anon where is your manager I need to speak to them
> I get assistant manager since she is the one who orders all the shit in the store
> Assistant manager smiles and says "I'm ordering it but it's not coming in"
> lemon man leaves his coffee and storms out of store
> a week passes
> we finally get like 3 boxes of fucking lemon juice packets
> stuff them in sight for lemon man
> I decide to try some of it on my coffee
> it tastes like complete shit and kinda smells like piss
> no wonder he was so pissed off all the time
Here is another story of lemon man
> out of decaf coffee
> lemon man looses his shit and starts going through all our shit and he makes it himself
> he is just staring at the coffee slowly being made
> after dealing with lots of customers he appears in the line
> I ask him if he got his decaf
> he says he definitely did
> after he exits store notices pot is full
> mfw when he took house blend coffee instead and lied
> mfw all he had to do was remove the coffee pot and lit the fresh coffee drip straight into his cup
Turns out he is like a liberal arts college teacher or something.
>>
>>692257241
excuse me but do you know how much im paying for these lessons little lady?
>>
>>692254667
But to be fair I work a 7-8hr shift just like you guys, our hours just run differently.
>>
>>692258100
I could see why.I would do the same thing for my girlfriend. Hell i'd go up there and make a scene just to get her fired if I had to. Any more stories? I've always wondered how working at one of those places would be.
>>
>>692250580
Of course not.
>>
>>692257598
Authentically interested in hearing stories from sex shop workers. Must be interesting. What are the best things that happen there?
>>
No real horror stories just the usual apathetic bullshit.
>soccer moms are the worst customers, any women coming into your store between the hours of 8:00-11:00 are guaranteed to be the biggest cunts on the planet, while not soccer moms themselves women in business wear especially

>idiots coming in to buy cameras and electronics without have even remotely considered what they want
>have to walk tons of people through basic decision processes
I know not everyone has the time or interest to be super tech savvy but if you need a point and shoot, want a point and shoot, please don't have someone spend an hour showing you DSLRs and learning you up on basic terminology.

>every time a new nintendo product would come out a horde of people would form up at the doors and as soon as they opened would speed walk back to electronics, regulation fucking speed walking, one foot in contact with the ground at all time, plenty of fedoras, trilbies, and adventure time hats among them. dorks so severely dorked they'd stick out as losers at an anime convention. every now and then i'd recognize one of them as having been in the furry or anime cliques at my high school.
>similar but much smaller crowd would come in each trailer day and pick through the new hot wheels and action figures

>people who don't know the name of the product or item they are searching for but expect you to know exactly what they are describing poorly

>staff from the nearby Renaissance fair coming in pirate outfits because Renaissance fair just screams pirates and steampunk to some people

>>692257807
everyone of our mobile reps were terrible.
>>
>>692257220
Sure. I'm writing as I go, so these take a while.
>be Sunday
>Afternoon public session is always packed
>Kids just finish learn to skate classes, church groups come, birthday parties
>It's the perfect storm
>for public sessions, we offer little PVC goal-looking things that are 2 feet tall
>Little kids can hold onto them and push like a walker if they have trouble skating
>personally don't like giving them, it's an unnecessary crutch, when they should be learning to skate on their own
>also they were made by hockey boss and are super shitty
>break all the time
>parents constantly ask for them
>we only have two
>before the Sunday session starts two people came and requested the walkers
>More parents come and ask if they can have them after
>shrug
>parents who have walkers, just give it to whoever asks them, I have no control over this, and I don't care enough to regulate
>one parent leave a walker by the door to take their kid to the bathroom
>another parent poaches it, just as the other parent comes back
>The two start screaming at eachother as to who gets it
>a fucking brawl breaks out over a fucking plastic walker
>I have to stop two parents from beating eachother over PLASTIC FUCKING WALKERS
>this was not in my job description
I have more...
>>
Earlier today I literally spent 10 minutes on the phone explaining to this girl the "types of tacos we have" and "why the nacho cheese flavored ones are more expensive".
Also a bonus Story:
>dude calls store at like 10:30pm
>"yall fucked up all my food"
>ok sir what did you get
>"like uhhh two 12-packs and 3 giant nachos"
>so the shift leader tells him to come in tomorrow
>whale human waddles in next day
>"you guys messed up my order"
>tells us completely different order from last night
>manager catches bullshit and tells guy to fuck off
people are scum bags
>>
>Be me a few years ago
>Telecommunications Major at reputable university
>Be working at Microcenter
>Old man makes me spend 15 minutes explaining the differences between CAT5,CAT5E,CAT6,CAT6A cables, why you would want to use certain ones over other, etc
>Had just written a paper about various cabling weeks prior, outlining crosstalk, etc
>Guy turns to me and says "I don't think you have a damn clue what you are talking about"

I spent the next hour in the breakroom contemplating leaving and going to the bar across the street.
>>
>>692255985
Ha, ha, ha. You're an uptight asshole.
>>
>>692254359
It's fucking Wal-Mart. Do not expect customer service from Wal-Mart. The don't give a FUCK. They don't train anyone anything and no one knows shit. They have become such a monopoly they don't give a fuck about your business because they know there are 100 more cucks just like you who will shambling in and burp and fart and buy evey last product they need in their lives at fucking Wal-Mart.
>>
>>692252819
Why the fuck is that a rule?
>>
>>692257457
i feel bad for those kids
>>
>>692248947
MOAR
>>
>>692256230
That was a good year, faggot.
>>
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>>692257908

Look at the edge on this kid! Isn't it past your bedtime?
>>
>>692258393
Sorry to hear that man. Our DM is huge on us building a relationship with our stores, so maybe that's why. Hell, my best friend is an electronics TM.
I spider wrap and help guests the best I can, although when it comes to stuff in infant and toys I'm useless.
I'd talk to your store manager if your mobile people are being shitty, escalate that shit as far as you can.
>>
>>692258065
It's not unheard of to know your kids shoe size.
>>692258193
He called me "Miss" a lot. Especially when he wanted my attention. I actually saw him a few more times. I didn't always work the day he came for his kids lessons, thank God.
>>
>>692254398
Hillbillies and FAS inbreds have hard ons for fireworks something fierce
>>
>>692258255
I have some more. I started working there in January but on my two weeks notice. My boyfriend doesn't live where I am so he just sits there and listens to all the stories I tell him.

>>692258278
One time 3 lesbians came in looking for a stripper pole, I show them our 4 stripper poles. They asked about strap-ons or gag gifts so I showed them. As I ring them up, they invited me to go to their party after work. I know I am not supposed to but. Fuck it. So I did but wasn't there long since it was after 12 and I was needing to go home for a phone call. I got $50 just for installing the stripper pole.
>>
>>692251784
>doesn't know English
>Lives in the US

Can we start euthanizing these people?
>>
>>692257821
Can't tell if sarcastic or not.
>>
>>692257913
I never understood why people do that, is it that hard to poop in the giant opening?
>>
>>692257598
wtf man
>>
>>692246650

Bitch you think working at retail sucks? Try working at a call center, specially one related to financial services.
>>
>>692258739
Well then start typing girl
>>
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>>692257201

There's a McDonalds manager near my home that talks to me in the most condescending voice and gets visibly irritated every time I order with him. I swear to god one of these days I am going to lose it.

> Went in one time and ordered some McNoogers
> Ask him for honey mustard
> "We don't have honey mustard"
> "That's fine I'll just have some spicy mustard then"
> "We don't have that either"
> I can plainly see the mustard at the end of the condiments....
> Ask him again for spicy mustard
> Manager repeats, almost yelling at me
> "We have HOT mustard, buffalo etc."
> mfw
>>
Here's a story about a good friend of mine who is the worst retail employee on the fucking planet

>be me
>shopping at barnes and noble
>text buddy
>"Hey, are you working? I want to use your employee discount on some books."
>he texts back "Yeah, I'm in the bathroom."
>"Don't text me while you're in the bathroom. That's gross."
>"I'm just sitting in the stall, waiting for my shift to end."
>"When does it end?"
>"In about 4 hours."
>"What the hell? Come ring me up. I want a discount."
>"Just take them."
>"What?"
>"Just take them. Nobody will try to stop you. Nobody fucking cares."
>"Okay, cool. Have fun at work... see you later."

he eventually got promoted to management
>>
>>692257912
lmfao
>>
>>692258442
When someone insists that you don't know anything about what you deal when you really do is the fucking WORST.
>>
>Worked at a second hand shop for 3 years
>pay was shit but better than nothing and the city had little to no jobs
>We got people in all the time, we were pretty successful
>We have this rule for glassware:
> 4 for $1 or 50c each
>we had a shit ton of glassware so we practically gave it away
>In case youre wondering, buying 3 would be $1.50
>One day, smartarse lady comes in
>Wearing sports clothing, fit, energetic like she finished running or something
>"Hey id like to get these glasses please"
>3 glasses on the counter
>ok thats $1.50, but if you want, you can get 1 more AND itll be 50c cheaper
>"hmmmm can we pretend its $1?"
>uhhh (hate doing shit against policy)
>"like what if i bring over another glass and i give it back?"
>sure kek
>put through transaction of $1
>"ok! here you go, id like to 'donate' this glass"
>sorry maam we're not accepting donations of glassware at the moment
>Her face went straight from "i just won a million dollars and broke the system" to "someone ran over my cat"
i got lots more stories about that job if anyones interested?
>>
>>692257438
You sound like a pussy.
>>
>>692258169
you wanna hear the teachers stories of how fuckwitted you are?
i mean lemon here is a faggot, but i gotta say
>>
>>692254398
holy shit, i always thought fireworks were a hillbilly thing until i moved into the ghetto... niggas light that shit off every fuckin night in the summer. if someone started shooting up the hood i wouldn't even know cause i'd just assume it's some asshole who spent all their welfare check on fireworks
>>
>>692248056
there is worse than retail- fast food.
>>
>>692258169
>liberal arts college
not surprised. Literally cancer.
>>
>>692257339
Have not laughed this hard in years. Cheers mate.
>>
>>692258994
I'd love to hear more
Literally 50c did this.
>>
>>692259184
yep... not that poster but also living in the ghetoo...

I don't even have to watch football or basketball games or look up scores to find out who won. I can tell by the fireworks and gunshots.
>>
>>692259046

you sound like a samefag
>>
>>692256432
Maybe if you stupid fucks didn't take 20 years to upgrade your systems. Tape. Over the fucking thing or put a sign, stop being a stupid nigger.
>>
>>692259063
He has a right to complain he didn't do anything wrong other then think we lied to him, so no not really, he was pisses at the assistant manager not me since I made an effort to look for the shit for him
>>
>>692258722
by little lady i meant tits plox nao
just kidding you dont have to but nao plox
>>
>>692258992
I work as a consultant now. It gets better and worse. Men in suits drill the fuck out of you and make you repeat the same shit, but you make the $$$ by knowing your shit.
>>
>>692258911
Did u take the books?
>>
>>692248438
Wtf is pound world?
>>
>>692254359
Bet she was a nigger.
>>
>>692255355
Shut the fuck up faggot, I live on your tax dollars go back to your wagecuck job to pay my way fuckboy
>>
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>>692246650
>>>692250634

>A: between a small and a large.
>>
>>692255384

is this cunt serious?
>>
>>692258877
It wasn't too bad. But it's ridiculous how there are no guards there and thank god they were watching.

>>692258894
We had a customer who bought a DVD pack of pornos. I wasn't on the clock but my male coworker was. Turns out my coworker sold him the wrong DVDs and the customer come back complaining that once he got home he saw the DVDS were wrong. They man went through 3 coworkers trying to get his money back or exchange, but we do not do that ((obvious reasons))
I tried to help him as best as I can but I was just an employee and I have no power over that. Days later I was out at iHop and I went back to my car and I found a note threatening me that he would find me and kill me. I told my manager the next day at work and we banned him from the shop, but it didn't stop him from harassing me every time he found my car ((Which is extremely easy to find.)) I filed restraining orders against him he paid in debit so we had his I.D. printed due to we have problems of un-happy customers stealing our fucking traffic cones.
>>
>>692259563

I assume it's like Dollar world, but for britfags
>>
>>692259483
It's really not happening, I'm sorry. I'm not showing them to piss you off, I'm doing it because I don't really want my tits on the internet, even if no one knows it's me. Please don't take it personally.
>>
>>692247649
Id imagine they're wondering if its sweet, plain, or has a strong taste
>>
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>>692258911

My nigga thats how you work retail
>>
>>692246650
Worked as a Cartpusher at Walmart and went to school for CNC.
I was yelled at by store-security, and by my main manager for not 'policing the parkinglot' when a man parked in the firelane.

> Be pushing carts, doing my job
> security comes out, waves me over.
> "Anon. There's a vehicle in the firelane. I called the police."
> "Okay."
> "You aren't going to do anything about it?"
> "You said you called the Police. What do you want me to do about it?"
> "Shows how much you care about your job, anon. We're going to have a talk with your supervisor."
> "I'm not the Police. My lot is clear, I'm not getting what you want me to do about it."

> in security office.
> YOU ARE THAT LAZY THAT YOU COULDNT HAVE CALLED THE FUCKING POLICE?
YOU ARE CATCHING A WRITEUP. WE'RE SICK OF IT.
> "Well. I'm sick of you being a little bitch."
> his mouth drops
> brought to customer service where my manager is. security is steaming

> Okay. That is a level SEVEN SUPERVISOR , YOU WILL SHOW HIM RESPECT
> > Does that make me a level 1 cart-pusher?
> "I'm not the parkinglot police.
> Okay. WELL. I DON'T CARE WHO IT IS, IF JESUS PARKS IN THE FIRELANE, I WANT YOU TO CALL THE POLICE ON JESUS
> Alright. I'll call the police on Jesus.
> signed writeup
>>
>>692249583
I'm not your parents
>>
>>692258994
kek on you good sir
>>
People that want fresh fish but don't want to wait for it to cook
>>
>anything else?
>a million dollars

Every. Fucking. Time.
>>
>>692259476
i was just defending teachers, not shitty customers.
you i love
>>
>>692249583
Quit if you haven't already. Especially if you're in Lance laudun's district. That peice of shit will sell you down the river in a heartbeat for a pat on the ass from his superiors.
>>
>>692258881

This is now a call center stories thread

>working for a citi call center
>My job mostly consists on taking payments and redirecting people to the refunds department.
>One day some middle aged dude calls
>says he had made a reservation for a hotel but he will now be travelling to a different state so he wants to have his money refunded
>ok theres a refund request everyday I already know this shit like the back of my hand
>Explain to him that he has to contact the hotel manager first, because they're the ones who must try the refund first.
>Says he already did and that the manager told him to call us because he couldn't refund it.
>Check his transactions
>It's on transit, so nobody had a hold of that money, literally the only thing he could do was wait like 1 day until the payment posted on his statement so that we could refund it
>Explain "OK sir since the money is in transit, the only thing we can do is wait until it posts to give it back"
>"I do not want it to post, I want a refund"
>"Sir you're getting a refund, but we cant make it yet if it hasn't posted because
>guy cuts me off
>"I dont want the fucking thing to post"
>losing my temper
>Sir look let me explain, it has to post because
>guy cuts me off again
>"Are you fucking stupid? I dont want the payment to post
>Im annoyed as fuck so my accent is showing
>"oh I see youre a fucking retarded indian
>mfw im german
>Im about to fucking blow up and send this guy to hell
>he literally only had to wait a day and he'd get his full money back and it wouldnt fucking affect his credit record
>theres literally nothing else we could do
>transit values mean nobody has the fucking money yet
>guy requests for a local US agent
>tell him to fuck off in german, french and spanish
>"what was that?"
>hang up

gosh I fucking hated that place.
>>
>>692259465
A pussy with bad hearing, huh? You're going to do poor in retail, then.
>>
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>>692254006
someone needs to draw this scenario, fucking seriously please
>>
>>692259784
If anyone gives me shit about it I'll tell them I picked it up while I lived in the south.
Can't really think of an alternative.
>>
>>692258169
lemon juice in coffee sounds awful. Is this common?
>>
>>692258423
oh lord....
>>
>>692260001

really, you still at this?
>>
>>692259763
corporate drones, put em in a situation where they have to think and watch their lives unravel.
>>
>>692258911
>>692259708

he's right. Businesses by definition have to pay you less than you're worth to turn a profit, and retail is especially horrible in gladly exploiting workers who were raised hearing "you just gotta work hard to get ahead at a job" and "minimum wage for minimum work isn't how you should do it." all that happens is you work hard and make the same shit pay as the guy who steals books and eats food on the clock.

Trust me, those businesses would cut your grandmother's throat for a nickle. I literally got threatened with being fired on the spot when I asked why a seasonal hire they kept on was being paid more than me, despite me being able to work more departments and having more experience. "ask about pay again and we'll fire you."

it's not the 50s anymore. you don't get to be a CEO by hard work and decades with the company. lateral movements that have room to be promoted is how you move up.
>>
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>>692259763
you did good, and what you could
>>
>>692259987
do you live in europe or are you an european living in the US?
>>
>>692259184

sad thing -- all the shit i sold was terrible. like sparklers and colored clouds. and the shit was expensive.

actually, you know about sparkler bombs? you need sparklers with a specific chemical (i forgot what it was). we sold the sparklers with out.

do you know how many people bought the fucking shit out of sparklers thinking they could make a bomb out of it? we sold dozens of cases of sparklers by july 4th...
>>
>>692259763
This week on "Shit Anon Makes Up . . . "
>>
>>692246650
The ending explains why you think that easy as shit job is "terrible."
>>
>>692260315
nah. it happened.
>>
>>692259763
to answer your question, yes, I think cart pushers are lvl 1 at Walmart.

Lvl 7 isn't even like super fucking big, they're 2 steps below actual managers. They're still fucking hourly iirc lol
>>
>>692258438
amen
>>
People who try to get in after the front restaurant closes by knocking on the door for minutes on end or going and knocking on the drive through.
You can't order from the drive through without a car, go away.
>>
>>692260178
A pussy with bad hearing and poor comprehension skills? What a bummer, dude.
>>
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>>692258423
mon dieu the madness
>>
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cirkle k night shift here. ( statoil´s new name )

in sweden we recently had our students graduating, so i had a lot of drunk fuckers in my store, and one of them decided to take a dump, on top of the toilet lid. i had to scoop that shit out with a take-away-box...
>>
>>692259654
What is so notable about your car?
>>
>>692259987
>This is now a call center stories thread
No its not. go fuck yourself.
>>
>>692256581
I don't blame him. GameStop is a rip off and knowingly resells broken and defective used products.
>>
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>>692257339
This reminds me of another incident from the women's bathroom I had (already posted about poopbucket)
>had to piss
>take cleaning supplies to clean the bathrooms and get it done with after I pee
>men's room
>seems fine few pee droplets on the seat
>few tp squares about
>clean then piss
>next up women's bathroom
>walk out and see a women walk out with a wide eyed expression
>complains that the toilet is clogged
>told her that I just cleaned the men's she could use that one
>they're single bathrooms with locks.
>walk in and hit the invisible wall of shit.
>look in the toilet
>wtffml.jpg
>Fetid shit lasagna
>two different women
>covered someone else's shit with brown paper towels that you can't flush and shat on that
>two different women because two different poop colors
>dark brown with burnt Siena
>other horrid green
>no fucken consideration of the backsplash from the previous shit soup
>ohgodwhy
>had to hold back the paper towels with the plunger while I flushed the shit piles down.
>never under any circumstances go into the women's bathroom.
>>
>>692260673
so you
took it away?
>>
>>692260556
People who mumble into the drive through speaker and then YELL at you when you ask them to repeat them self.
Alternately, people who SCREAM into the speaker. Like I will turn the headset down, but when the first noise you make is a shout it catches everyone off guard.
>>
>>692258393
Regulation speedwalking. Forty keks
>>
>>692246650
So tf what you fag? "Customer service".

/thread
>>
>>692260715
That it is a piece of shit. But it gets me to places.
>>
>>692258994
>>692259424
Fantastic!
>Working counter as usual
>a 50-something year old lady walks up to me talking on her phone, wearing bright lipstick, jewelry galore, etc
>"Excuse me, can my kid use your bathroom"
>Lil kid right next to her practically pissing himself
>Only employees are allowed to use the bathroom so that no one someone steals
>uhhh (hate doing shit against policy)
>Remember this one time a kid pissed all over some books for some dumbshit reason, family just watched and left immediatly without paying for damages
>Sure, but only your kid can go
>"yeah whatever, go on Savane"
>Kid waddles/runs to bathroom
>back to business
>few hours later, closing time
>We always rang a loud bell to tell people to stop browsing and either go pay or leave
>Door opens behind me
>this fucking kid walks out like he just woke up
>say to my boss "didnt that kids mom leave several hours ago?"
>"oh fuck"
>boss proceeds to drive kid to police station, i have no idea what happened next
TLDR: Milf forgets child at my store who went to sleep in the bathroom somehow unnoticed
more stories?~
>>
>>692247313
$400 every two weeks?! You fking slave.
>>
>>692259680

such a polite way to say no for b. whats wrong with you?
>>
>>692260768
Girls restrooms are ALWAYS worse than the guys, seriously they are pigs when they use them
>>
>>692260747
I don't know what kind of shit experience you had but we don't knowingly resell broken shit. And he was talking about one of the white page manuals. If you get pissed about that then you're a fucking autist.
>>
>>692256997
You have never worked retail. This is the exact mindset of a spoiled, entitled baby boomer.
>>
>>692258709
Sounds like Lance Laudun to me. Don't ever trust that faggot for a second, never text or call him for anything. Find out his address and burn his house down if you can.
>>
>>692261148
My store has a small bucket thing for pads/tampons/whatever and it's always fucking coated in period blood like come on
>>
>>692260604

yep, samefag. back to grandma's basement you go.
>>
>>692260790

yeah, had to =/ new at my job so i cant let shit slide...
>>
>>692260273

im a european living in america. I really hope they dont have any call centers in europe
>>
>>692261148
yet another reason to have different sex bathrooms.
>>
>Live in nowheresville
>work in ski town ~45 miles away
>pizza place
>just answering phones really
>order for two philly cheesesteaks
>no cheese
>no onions
>no mushrooms
>no bell pepper on one of them
>winding down so dishes before I clock out
>come back to main area
>coworker accidentally fucked up three times
>I walk out with some free philly cheese
>this wasn't a horror story
>>
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>>692247649
> Working a Friendly's
> Nignog women orders a warm brownie sundae to go
> She calls 20 mins later
> "Yo I jus got home n muh ice cream be melted!"
> Well ma'am I'm sorry but you did order a warm brownie sundae so it's expected that the ice cream would melt if not eaten anyway
> Dat bullshit lemme talk to yo manager
> Speaking ma'am, what can I do for you?
> Fuck u I'm not cumin dur anymoe
> Idgaf *click*

Obviously exaggerated but you get the point

> Pic semi-related, one of my creations there
>>
>>692261163
He was probably one of those faggots that try to collect CIB games. (complete in box)
>>
I worked retail for the last 4 months, now out because I broke my foot at work but they're not giving me workers comp and they fired me, but that's another story. I worked in a supermarket bakery, and some people were fucking stupid
>one customer as, I shit you not, if we made any Guinness Cake, like the beer. I still don't know what the fuck that is
>Can you write Congratulations X and Y on this cake, when it was like a 5" cake
>do you have cherry pies? (I show them where they are) no sorry I meant the cherry turnovers
>do you have any more x in the back? No bitch this is the bakery section, as in fresh made
There was this one encounter that was awkward, some qt girl came up to the counter and asked if I can write on one of those cookie cakes, I said yes, and she said "Eat Me. Yeah, can you write that one the cake?" I wanna say she might have been flirting with me, but I'm fat and ugly so...
>>
>>692246650
>Sorry, I thought at least one of you was a man, until I noticed you were on the rag.
>>
>>692254006
Lmao what
>>
If the Target mobile fag is still here, ya mind telling me which district you work in? I worked in the SW district.
>>
>>692259987

The worst fucking part about call centers is when people fail to understand that the agent is using a SYSTEM to get his work done.

If youre a client you dont fucking know how the system works.

Dont fucking ask me why im asking X question

Im asking X question because the system requires me to do so

dont try to tell me some way I can "bypass" stuff because I fucking cant.

YOU.DONT.KNOW.HOW.THE.SYSTEM.WORKS
>>
>>692246650
This is my dad's from working at a burger place.
>Dad is a manager for a burger place
>Business as usual
>Customer comes up with her fries half eaten
>"I would like new fries please, these ones are gross."
>dad: "Oh of course, but may I ask what was wrong with them?"
>"Yeah, they tasted like potatoes."

People are so fucking used to shit like McDonald's that they don't realize that fries AREPOTATOES.
>>
>>692261571
Most call centers for american callers are located in india. Very rarely youll get american or german.
Most of the time I call its about an hour on hold, then Ill get connected to some shitskin with the thickest accent, struggle to hear them, get doxxed for the next 10 minutes, then theyll give me some bullshit about how they wont help me or do their job in any way shape or form.
>>
>>692261827
I work in WA, not really sure which district that falls under.
>>
>>692261827
I mean southeast. Sorry, drunk as fuck
>>
>>692261287
Same here, the worst bit is when there's a poorly wrapped bloody tampon stuck the bottom and you have to peel it off
>>
>>692261652
I'm fine with people that want to buy CIB shit. I can understand the appeal, but that's like picking up a legendary case for a game used and expecting the season pass to work in it. You just don't try to buy that shit used.
>>
>>692246650
Thecustomerisalwayswrong dot com

TONS of customer service nightmares.
>>
>>692261969
Probably northwest. Glad you're far away from my old district. The SE dm is gonna wake up with a knife in his back with all the enemies he's made.
>>
>>692249583
God, you sound like a real pussy.
>>
>>692259654
Now we know why your bf want you to quit
>>
>>692257598
I would have shit my pants
>>
>>692262079
Exactly, that's some stupid fag that wants CIB on the cheap. Same guy that will screw over a kid for a deal.
>>
>>692254025

Fair play giving it a go. Have a mate who was always a little jittery and over anxious when we worked retail together.

One of those electronics stores where you have to ask a million bullshit questions about buying addons for their items, being added to the mailing list etc at the point of sale.

He used to say excellent, when someone said no to the script because he was nervy and would then get reamed out by the manager for not trying to "sell" the a mailing list entry.

Retail sucks balls. I ended up going self employed doing security and network installs before becoming to cripple to get out of the house
>>
>>692262212
Yeah from what I've heard some DMs run their districts like real cunts. I can only imagine what it's like working there in the south, people can be awful.
What state were you in?
>>
>>692261881
I sorta know what she means though. Its like when I order a fry and they all taste like fries but then I get a random mouth full of rotting potato taste.
>>
>>692257912
Beautiful.
>>
>>692255384
Either troll or stupid, can't tell which one
>>
>>692262545
Fucking Louisiana. Worst goddamn niggerish customers. Even the white ones somehow...
>>
>>692262308
Yup. But I love what I learned from working there, for bedroom reasons of course. And I actually enjoy talking to people about pleasure and showing them how to tie someone up etc.

>>692262341
I kept my taser and pepper spray close. Along I am a black belt. Try my hardest to keep myself safe.
>>
>>692262344
I just don't want his tard rage tearing up my store
>>
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>Work at Burrito place
>night shift
>go to clean men's bathroom
>only one toilet and sink, spacious too
>notice lots of pee stains all over toilet
>looks like the toilet grew freckles all over
>pee stains looked dark so assume they're from this morning
>the air around the bowl smells stale
>mfw it wasn't pee
>a week goes by
>older guy comes in
>smells exactly like the toilet that day
>enemyspotted.jpg

another small one

>Go to women's bathroom this time
>notice finger sized smudges on wall
>call co worker
>ask her why the hell someone would wipe a ground beef burrito on the wall
>"that's not ground beef" she says
>she walks away

girl who did it prob poked her finger through the cheap toilet paper into her flush pipe and wiped it on wall after
>>
>>692255384
Holy shit you're dumb
>>
>>692257598
Holy shit
>>
>>692261919

Most are actually located in latinamerica now. Since its cheaper and a higher quality service than india. As far as I know, citi only had 2 or 3 call centers in the entire}ity of the US.

And we say taht shit because if we dont we get fucking penalized, and that makes us inelligibly to participate in bonus programs for a month.

Also, like some other anon pointed out: You dont know how the system works. Theres no fucking way to bypass it. A woman called said she wanted her interests removed, I submitted a request to do so, system says yes or no, it said no, boo fucking hoo theres literally nothing more to do

"What thefuck, a friend of mine called and she did had them removed, remove them!"

"I cant remove them the request was denied"

"My friend had them removed!!! do the same!!! now!!!"

FFS, its a fucking lotto. Do you fucking think I dont want every call to last at least 30 seconds?
>>
I work at jcpenney
Ama
>>
>>692262696
Oh lord, yeah that's pretty bad. I lived in SC for a while and the people there were terrible, I can't imagine further south.
Did you go up north? It's nicer here.
>>
>>692262720
Unfortunately Gamestop is a big draw for those goddamn autists. I love games, but I'll never work at a game store because I can't handle the cringe.
>>
>>692262856
have you ever worked at jcpenney?
>>
>>692256997
lmao fuck off femanist. we are here to let out some anger . go back to your knitting.
>>
I'm of Mexican descent and work in a sporting goods in walmart. I get told "I'm buying ammo so I can shoot mexicans in the border" at least once a week. Been there for 3 years
>>
>>692252517
I'm Italian and i find this ilarious.
So in USA shops pay people to retrieve carts and if those cart retrievers fail the entire shop is fucked up, did i get this right?
>>
>>692255355

Guessing you enjoy a spot at the top of the greasy pole where you use 100 calories worth of energy a day while we break our backs for the shittiest pay and conditions in the first world.
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