Sup /b/ Im getting married in a few months and ive been contemplating

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Sup /b/ Im getting married in a few months and ive been contemplating life the last few months.

On the surface im your average joe working the 9-5 train, pay my taxes blah blah blah but behind the scenes i've lived a pretty crazy life and even through some terrible shit has happened I met this awesome girl and I managed to get her to say yes so yay for me but it has started making me think.

I have a wild fascination with the world have have started travelling to a few country(live in south africa so poor fag when shit comes to travel and need to safe up for shit long) and have never stopped myself from experiencing shit in life, partied hard from early on ,sex drugs and rock'n'roll, dealt for a while making some scratch to survive ,growing up in a troubled household you get tough or get dead,

then i get exposed to my fiance's normal family life, real american dream type shit, dad's a respected deputy principal, mom's a home maker, sister is a accountant, brother is a lawyer, noone's ever even smoked a jay never mind done half the whack shit i've pulled, fairly well off due to granpa leaving behind quite a hefty sum in his will.

i just cant see myself ever being that normal.

now to give some back story of exactly how fucked up shit can get here is a lil meet the family we tried organizing about a month ago

we arrange a family vacation for a weekend away and her entire extend family falls in ( and i mean everyone /b/ros like uncles aunts granma the whole goddamn family) and make it this super vaykay and my shithole fam never even pitch coz they had a bitch fit with each other and just fucked off

now back to the point of the post, i have been doing some serious soul search due to the upcoming wedding and i dont know if i can be this person, how /b/ do you leave a lifetime of thoughts and experiences behind and become normal???