jhgf
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
jhgf
Is it bad to want to make a guy male pregnant after too much anal sex?
>leveling anything but str
>>680171077
Yes
Kids are awful
>>680171037
That level of failure is absolutely astounding.
>>680171077
Since it's impossible no value judgment is really necessary.
>>680171075
Yeah, I lost track of patches/siegward/greirat at some point. But I completed the Anri quest by accident and made sure to take care of muh sorcerer.
Now I want to reread The Penisman
thanks katia you fucking faggot
>>680171240
You make no impression in general.
>>680171231
And that's why I summon. B-but I invade a lot too I'm a real man.
>>680171323
ky
>>680171323
look it's your own fault for loving cock that much dude
>still waiting for Bue Sentinel summons
>>680171228
I killed Yuria because I wasn't all that interested in getting that ending and as a result missed out on the Elite Knight set, was not worth.
>>680171434
I'm really mad about what happened to Anri. I actually didn't expect it. I don't know how I'm stupid enough to think anything involving darkstalker kaathe would turn out well, but after I beat the soul of cinder and before I enter NG+ I am killing the SHIT out of that bitch.
>>680171355
>>680171388
It was a good series
about a man who has a penis for a head
SHUT UP NEF YOU DUMB WHORE NO ONE CARES
>>680171330
You are not a real man unless you kill half the bosses in the game by yourself with a
+4-7 bandit knife.
Dgdadvs
FUCK YOU KATIA YOU JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND QUALITY YOU TRIPLE-PEASANT SCUM
>>680171724
If I played dark souls for the PvE experience maybe but I never have. Beating bosses in challenge runs is entirely an execution challenge once you know the moveset and I don't play games for that. Destroying a similarly matched human being is a mental challenge.
Mound-Makers invasions in the swamp are very fun though, be summoned by a poor host just to lead him to the Darkwraith.
>>680171596
I'm still trying to wrap my head around that ending, I don't quite get it yet. Considering the Dark Lord ending of DS1 had you do something completely different.
>>680171964
I don't know what happens in that, or any ending, since I am too busy being a dickwraith (dickfinger?) to finish the fucking game. But if I understand what usurpation of fire entails, what you're basically doing is making yourself hyperpowerful, consuming the first flame like a soul.
faggot
I am a casual and that is why I play offline
Got a cold last night so I took a shower, shaved and went to bed. I apparently knocked all my sheets off myself and was walked in on by my roommate.
Wat do
>>680171844
Its ruined. I invade 10 people in a row and its host and 3 summons and then some blue faggot pops in as reinforcements.
I dont even bother for a fight when I invade now, I just accompany the party through the level and spew poison at the worst possible time. Or waste their time so they dont advance.
>>680172255
>>680172255
You are a fucking garbage baby shitbird loser.
>>680172268
1. learn to gankspank
2. blues only show up if someone's wearing a way of blue ring so you'll see it less in later game areas (also killing the blue is worth more as a rosaria finger)
3. often you won't be the only invader. I've had 3 on 3s where it's me, another dark spirit, and then like a mad spirit. Sometimes those jackasses kill me, since they can, but generally everyone's aware that going for the host and company is the best outcome for us.
>>680172263
go back to sleep?
>>680172115
Why not invade as a Warrior of Sunlight instead? Jolly decapitation.
Maybe I'll watch a video of the ending and see what he does, my current character has a different ending in mind.
Well, I must be
You're the expert in these things
>>680172263
what kind of roommate do you have where it's a big deal if he sees you naked? on my birthday I got hammered and threw up so much on my clothes that I woke up wearing my roommate's pajamas and no underwear.
>>680172556
>jolly decapitation
That's fucking rich. Anyway because I didn't get the warrior of sunlight covenant (I know where it is, I'm just lazy) and this character isn't faith anyway. Plus being the equivalent of a dickwraith feels right. When I make a faith character I'll try that though.
>>680172492
>>680172461
What if I told you that I didn't even buy the game
>>680172492
I kill other reds so they dont leach my kill.
>>680172730
oh well if you pirated that shit then we're all good
I literally only bought it since I love PvP so much
>>680172756
We both get the reward you enormous jackass!
>>680172730
Casual.
>>680172687
I had great fun invading with a complete Solaire cosplay on, I was just missing the Lightning Spear component.
Do you even get anything decent for ranking up in the Fingers?
bombing of exam unsuccessful
kinda wonder how bad bernie is gonna lose ny
>>680172850
I saw a few of my friends play DS2 in PvP, they were certainly not enjoying it, I wouldn't enjoy it either
>>680172908
That's exactly how I position myself
>>680172942
good
>>680172939
no, you get a nerfed fog ring and later a dumb staff.
stupid nerfed fog ring didn't even stop silver knights from blasting me.
>>680173043
They were BAD.
>>680172556
Why not invade as a Warrior of Sunlight instead? Jolly decapitation.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eT53-4SXCBE
>>680172942
0/10
>>680173052
did u send
>>680172850
That NOT enough for me. I do not feel fulfilled with sharing.
Sunbro for life u also look good when rekking scrubs. Tobad most phantoms are useless turtling
Fuckheads
>>680173199
And I would be even worse
>>680173233
NO NOT YET I DIDNT GO TO SCHOOL TODAY ILL DO IT THURSDAY AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
>>680173043
>pink stockings
Hnng
>>680173256
It's not even sharing. If one red kills a host, he gets x amount. If 2 reds kill a host, they both get x amount. You are simply an asshole.
>>680173292
turtling is TERRIBLE in ds3
>>680173359
You git gud.
>>680173199
Shame, rewards for WoS and Watchdogs were pretty good since they're the only ones I've been able to farm the items for.
>>680173200
Reminds me that I need to be summoned into the Catacombs, equip that ring and then destroy the wooden bridge before Wolnir.
What are the locations for all of you bottoms anyways?
>>680173367
>>680173535
I wanted to pursue the watchdog covenant but I didn't get a single invasion for them in the entire time I was sitting in farron fucking bullshit swamp.
>>680173613
you said subs last time, changing one word does not make the question less stupid.
>>680172687
The kind you've only had for 2 weeks
>>680173673
alright that's fair
>>680173471
I have a very weak ability to git gud. I get tired of failing pretty quickly.
>>680173471
Yup all they do is run behind the bos when you have agro with their shield raised then occasionally
Swinging until they get agro then they usually die
>>680173471
It upsets me seeing other people succeed, Only I should succeed so I have to kill everything or at least make their time as horrible as possible.
>>680173671
There's 3 enemies outside the Keep Ruins bonfire you can farm the items from. Takes ages, but my reward was a neat curved greatsword and Artorias' Greatshield, my favourite one.
>>680173613
Likely nowhere near you.
Cause I'm in the middle of nowhere.
>>680173535
Serious though, if you've not watched Iron Pineapple before - his videos are amazing.
>>680173750
You are soft, and moreover brittle enough that not even whetstone could sharpen you. I abhor failed men. Kill yourself.
>>680173845
dude
use shield breaker
like 30 million different weapons has it, you get an instant riposte
>>680173889
it's good to know that you're a dick at least.
>>680173947
since I'm using tiny little girl weapons on this character I wouldn't bother. Also I hate leveling covenants from goddamn PvE
have it*
>>680173471
This is also why I have no motivation to beat the game because I know tons of people beat it before me.
>>680174024
No
>>680174163
And now I understand why nibbles is a virgin.
>>680173996
Aww, but where though?
>>680174024
Im talking fellow phantoms against bosses
>>680174000
Got this from his twitter a while ago.
>>680174024
Felt as bad as it did trying to farm for Loyce Souls, at least I only had to get 30 this time...
yay it's subby
>>680174401
Arkansas. Central.
>>680174439
Oh right.
Well, that's a more or less optimal strategy, irritatingly.
>>680174489
God farming in dark souls 2 was HORSESHIT. Also I can't wait for ds3 cheat engine. I have so many builds that need making.
>>680174549
bad timing. I'm leaving for class now.
noooooooooooo
kek
>>680174024
The game frustrates me because there are few "Funhouse" places to make it 10x worse.
>>680174277
I thought things were apparent.
>>680173613
Canadian bottom here
>>680174401
The Netherlands but not a bottom tho
>>680174665
Unfortunate that they carried things like the horrendous amount of farming and crappy covenants over.
At least they didn't carry any characters over. Oh how I enjoyed finding Gilligan dead.
>>680174401
Where you from?
>>680173613
Scottish bottom :3
>>680174620
Dang, so far from everyone...
>>680174921
How is maple syrup land treating you?
this is a goteposting thread, right?
>>680175533
Nah its far worse than that
>>680175114
Nobody's perfect.
>>680175591
>>680175448
I've seen one guy in thread from Arkansas before. He stepped out before I could chat at him though.
i wonder how many people bottom simply because they are too lazy to top
>>680175646
nothing is worse than butts
>>680175448
Not bad, severe lack of Canadian tops in these threads, wish I lived in AZ or AK, seems to be where they all reside.
Or wherever you're from I guess~
>>680175652
What can i say im an ass man
Also pawjobs but those don't exist >:
>>680175664
dude looks like a lady
>>680175767
good morning phagot
That's deep.
>>680175397
Have you gotten your boy-cooter poked yet?
>>680175821
Strange how wrong can be so right
>>680175179
Dead gilligan was a glorious moment.
>>680174798
haha, I tricked you! I will shitpost from class!
>>680174815
I think farron keep is pretty good for fucking people over.
>>680175841
I bet if you tried hard enough, you could look like a lady.
>>680174489
I fucking keked so fucking hard that I squeezed my fleshlight so hard that it broke in half
>>680175913
Good morning there pumpkin
how are you doing this lovely day
>>680175664
that wont b u if u dont send
>>680176041
hey do you remember what I said about ferrus mannus/iron hands
this is why /tg/ is the best.
>>680175214
Texas. It's... okay.
>>680175829
There probably are said tops that come in but they pop out before you even notice them.
>>680176041
stop it your lies are tearing this family apart
>>680176041
You mean the spot where the wraiths are fighting the creature people?
>>680176179
It's good that they can laugh at themselves.
>>680176224
I didn't want to BE a family, but your GODDAMN CATHOLICISM forced it! I'm fulfilling my responsibilities now leave me the fuck alone, woman!
>>680176287
Nah, the first bonfire labeled farron keep. Basically anyway there's poison is good.
badger I am home if you are here
>>680176207
Hard to grab their attention without straight up asking if anyone is a top from the PNW that's dtf.
>>680176510
what's with the namefield
>>680175686
Well if you ever want to come even more south, don't ask me why, I'm sure you probably would find some needy dick to be sat on.
>>680176207
Texas isn't too far away. I have to go down to Dallas for an interview soon.
don't hate on dawn's name
>>680176536
jesus almighty christ could you people just download grindr and fuck off
>>680176356
pls
>>680176541
dom gave me a name
>>680175834
You could always make a guy wear gloves or something while he handjobs you.
>>680176654
star warhammers. Best crossover.
>>680176673
>dom
disgusted.
>>680176053
I wouldn't even have to try very hard, just let my hair grow out and wear girly clothes.
>>680176081
Going alright, looking like it's gonna be fuckall kinds of hot again today so I'm staying in. Went on a long ass walk yesterday though, to the point where there was blood in my socks when I took them off. Now it hurts to stand so I'm gonna just hang out here for a day.
>>680176541
he's being fucking GAY
>>680176635
Grindr is gross
>>680176765
beste
>>680176240
Why the quote?
>>680176632
I now have to.
>>680176777
what a goddamn queer piece of shit
>>680176836
it is the correct place for what you desire
>>680176852
cultist katia close second
>>680176765
>>680176605
Well, now you just have to post an image of your ass and mention if you want to be seeded or not.
>>680176716
Im to closet fur for that shit man
>>680176956
We will agree to disagree about your name.
>>680177049
that is acceptable
poor freklz
fuckin imperial guard
humanity fuck yeah
>>680177202
this
>>680177183
Tragically I cannot talk to you about anything interesting since I'm shitposting innaclass and can't listen to music.
>>680177216
Nationalism is infinitely better than humanism.
>>680177251
it's okay i like ur name
>>680177018
You have kik, so we don't annoy people in the thread?
the name bothers me because Dawn is the name of one of my sisters.
>>680176777 (checked)
but wouldn't going for a swim in hot weather be more funner
yikes, well better your feets than your ass to be bleeding. if you cant stand then how will you get food?
>>680176356
Oh the swamp.
>>680176777
I could fap to it.
it is a SHITTY NAME
>>680177353
damn
I'd ask you what you think of dark souls 3 but I've already gleaned your opinion on it from the thread
>>680177366
thx anon
>>680177441
sux
>>680177516
ur a shitty name
>>680177441
Barry is the name of a famous cross-dresser.
>>680177547
SHUT UP AVERY
>>680177375
I wish to give you a trophy.
>>680177441
Suddenly, incest fetish.
>>680177465
Of course. Make the most miserable part of the game more miserable.
I also like invading the area after pontiff sulyvahn—I realize it's high traffic, but NOTHING is more satisfying than fucking with kids when they're on the rafters or trying to fight the douchebag crocodoggos.
>>680177547
I can elaborate.
cat gun best gun julian
>>680177656
>>680177595
no u shut up
>>680177603
go for it, bearing in mind that I played dark souls 1 for about 3 hours 3 years ago
>>680177375
It's been ages so I don't even remember. You could just post anyways though.
I also think you should just post your butt to everyone because butts.
Also, seriously, fuck the crocodoggos.
>>680177864
catboy best boy
>>680177920
DO NOT MAKE ME USE YOUR NAME
Fuck this Fluffy Yaoi.. Ist so disgusted learn to love Pussy(<3).
>>680177999
>>680178218
I do tho...
>>680177516
>>680177516
>>680177516
>>680177516
>>680177465
I'd like that.
>>680177446
>MORE FUNNNER
I can stand and walk lol it's just a good excuse to be on my ass. And I could go swimming, were it not for the fact that I have no trunks nor do I want people seeing my awkward torso.
>>680177603
NO
>>680177920
The level design is substantially better than dark souls 2, and slightly better than post-anor londo dark souls 1 but worse than pre anor londo. Mechanically it's easily the best game of the 3, I also think it's by far the most challenging from a PvE perspective. The atmosphere is magnificent and it looks very, very good.
My main problems with it are that plotwise it's basically dark souls 1 redux, and the netcode is fucked. Not all covenants are created equal, either; getting invasions for rosaria is easy as hell but then trying to level up in blades of the darkmoon is hell on earth.
>>680177929
Nah, I'm good.
I only have a face picture atm and don't want to charge my phone to take more atm.
freklz has a better name than katia imo
>>680177375
>>680177929
I mean post Kik anyways.
>>680178263
B
I have the best name.
>>680178303
>were it not for the fact that I have no trunks nor do I want people seeing my awkward torso.
there's a feel
>>680178305
did the previous games have the same issue with the covenants?
>>680178356
>>680178303
fine
less funner
It would also be a good excuse to make [redacted] get you food and babysit you for a day
>I have no trunks
i like your style barry.
>>680178345
BondoOtter is my kik.
>>680178589
yeah. Covenants have never been well executed.
>>680178697
what is the mechanic behind those exactly
what does one do with them
If they don't add in the Blue Eye Orb, the Blades are fucked. Sentinels even have priority over them, to make it worse.
>>680177603
I have not made it that far. I went in and got one shotted so I said fuck it.
>>680178303
Well what can I say, I like long haired boys.
>>680178783
join them, do (usually multiplayer) stuff to level up in them, get rewards.
>>680178820
The fact that there's not a blue eye orb is making me extremely salty. How can I be fantasy judge dredd now?
>>680178417
Your name is alright
>>680178659
Alright, probably look at that later today
>>680178873
how the fuck did sulyvahn one shot you? What's your vigor?
>>680178912
my first name is god tier, my last name is shit tier and I will change it.
>>680178950
My first name is pretty good. I am happy with it.
It easily becomes a nickname
>>680178950
I put everything into dex and stamina and whatever the hell stat the increases my equip load.
>>680178924
Alright, I'll leave it up.
>>680178885
I would've thought they would've seen that the Way of Blue was shit in DS2, kind of silly to not change it. Also no actual Dragon covenant, which is odd.
>>680178885
but the multiplayer stuff has long queues based on the popularity of the covenant?
>>680179271
>>680178303
Honestly, I actually think I'm like the only one here that wouldn't want to be fucked by a slime and penetrated by tentacles.
>>680179146
I don't know what it is, tell me on steam later
>>680179171
That was stupid. Endurance levels super slowly so it's barely worth it, equip load is SUPER not worth it if you're not using big weapons/shields. I wear 3 pieces of fallen knight armor and the sage hat, with a longsword, staff, and grass crest shield, and with the ring of favor I'm still below fatroll at default vitality for sorcerer.
>>680179257
CAN WE TALK ABOUT HOW UGLY DRAGON TRANSFORMATION IS?
IT IS VERY UGLY
>>680179310
They're not queues really. It's just there's less opportunity for some covenants to advance because of the context in which they're allowed to invade.
>>680179171
so you're basically that pic you posted, but with 0 vigor
well no wonder
>>680179458
I used it once and killed myself to get rid of it. Archdragon Peak was a great area, though.
>>680179458
I will not
oh wait, you don't get the ring of favor until after sulyvahn. I was using havel's before that.
still before that I only leveled int/attunement/HP and nothing's been one shotting me.
>>680179617
Again, haven't gotten there. Last boss I killed was the dancer. God I need to hurry up I've played like 34 hours.
>>680179691
Why not?
>>680179240
Why would you be traveling anyways?
disgusting tripfags
>>680179458
oh, that's totally within their power to change
I suppose they wouldn't want to make certain instances of that feel shoehorned though
>>680179720
I like to pretend people won't be able to find me if I don't give up my full name
>>680179458
I dont get hit in pvp unless its like 3 people attacking me at once, I usually fuck people up with the falchion/bandit knife. So it works out.
>>680179608
Dual swords are shit though, I just use a knife/Falchion along with poisons to piss off phantom parties.
>>680179751
Job interview.
>>680179863
this reminds me of a guy who draws some shit.
>>680179943
Yeah, it's a difficult balance between lore logic and multiplayer pragmatism. They got it right with blues in dark souls 2 though and it feels like they've reverted.
>>680179971
dude you live in fucking australia. Not only am I not qualified to find you, I am never going to that hellhole.
>>680180032
Still, leveling END feels really unimportant in this game.
>>680180133
that is specific
>>680179774
disgusting normie
>>680179751
Assuming you mean when:
Two weeks from this Thursday.
>>680180173
I can't remember the name and could easily find it but I'm not looking up porn in class
I mean there's porn to the side but in thumbnails.
>>680180133
I mean through google.
>>680180133
It helps when you have 5 faggots chasing you with stale shit like katanas and claymores.
>>680180133
well when you change the story it'd get easier or harder to execute
or was that not story-based
>>680180298
fair enough
>>680180211
Normies?
Here?
On the internet?
Appalling.
>>680180373
oh yeah I know but still who cares.
>>680180385
So does HP, and that helps in other contexts.
>>680180413
Lore based, not story based. There was no lore reason for the change to blue invaders.
>>680180421
it's kinda weird anyway
anime traps post y/n
n
y
>>680180547
o i c
Hi :3
>>680180586
table flip
>>680180547
No, because if you get hit once the rest of the fag brigade will stunlock you.
n
>>680180646
I like to imagine the one on the right as katia.
>>680180547
I care. Some people are weirdo stalkers, like Katia. I'm surprised poor Kiss can sleep at night knowing that demented lunatic lives across town
>>680180035
Good luck man
>>680180786
no im this mid
>>680180550
Do it.
>>680180646
GODDAMMIT
>>680180711
if they have any ability to read rolls they'll get it anyway. Look, you're not winning a 5v1 unless they're terrible to begin with.
>>680180797
yeah but ~I'm~ normal.
>>680180797
Has anyone heard from Kiss in the past few months?
HMMMMM.
>>680180978
yeah he was in thread yesterday
>>680180978
yes, he's been posting recently
>>680180978
he was literally here earlier today
>>680180978
>Has anyone heard from Kiss in the past few months?
What? He's been posting regularly in the threads for like 3 weeks now
>>680180928
How do I know you're not pretending to be normal?
>>680181018
Ah, maybe he's finally getting more social again, then.
>>680181045
I was literally at work earlier today.
>>680181166
I've been trying very hard to convince you all I'm exceptional, actually.
>>680181166
I don't come by here much anymore.
>>680181217
sounds like something a normal person would do
dotter for up to date information
>>680181296
correct.
ooh, I didn't have that one
>>680181351
mighty suspicious
>>680181328
Aye.
Maybe I'll try adding him on Steam again.
>>680181271
Forgiveable
>>680181217
Sounds sociopathic
>>680181393
I'm afraid the truth is slowly coming out.
>>680181456
Narcissistic. Different, but related trait. Dark triad traits are normal, though.
>>680181456
Not that I've been doing anything interesting instead of being here, but y'know.
>>680181393
>ooh, I didn't have that one
did you want the dropbox link?
wait that last one was kinda lewd
>>>DUMPING
>>680180868
You are very supple, katia, yum.
>>680180928
I roll AWAY, I have more stamina so they are unable to keep up with, then I poison cloud the party or throw poison knives at the faggots.
The goal is to make the moment as unpleasant as possible.
>>680181824
sry
they're just too cute I cant help myself
>>680181837
You know roll away is punishable, right?
>>680181583
yes
>>680181537
D:
what will you do when your secret is revealed?
>>680181867
look I am rarely here at least be vaguely accommodating to my autism
>>680181877
I never get hit, if they try to sprint at me and stab I just roll into them and back again, works like a charm.
freklz make a thread
:fmad:
>>680182013
Yeah, they're bad.
>>680181583
Is that character off a show?
>>680182126
The one I am posting is Nefelpitou from Hunter X Hunter. Anime and manga.
The one I mentioned dropbox links for was a different one.
