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So I've been sick for a while now, coughing and coughing

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So I've been sick for a while now, coughing and coughing for hours on end, headaches and all that good stuff.

However, before that I felt that I'd begun losing motivation, not just to work out, but to study. talk with people, get a job... to fucking live.
I feel so fucking empty, like theres no reason to do... anything!

But amongst all this angst and sadboyz feels I have this constant gnawing at the back of my mind. If I fuck up my studies I'll be no further than where I started, but with a huge loan to booth.

This shit is really taking a toll on me, I seek motivation in "manliness" and all that gay shit. I have a fucking viking heritage for fuck sake, my ancestors were fishermen, farmers, warriors, craftsmen, fuck it, some of my distant relatives is famous artists and architects.

Also, my father is amongst the greatest men I've ever known. He may be a chubby 40 year old man who spends most of his time playing Civilization V when he's not at work, but holy fuck does that man work hard for this privilege to actually sit down and enjoy 2 hours of beer and strategy games. He's regularly sent of to the Barents sea to do research, this can take up to a month at a time, he's been on TV several times and his nettoworth I could probably round up to about 10 million dollars, house, boat and car included ofcourse.
But holy fuck did this glorious bastard work for this shit, he started out with some really shitty tech-building shit, boring work and just above avarage wage, but he got a...how do you say, "trial period" on a decent job amongst these scientist, and won't you know he became their fucking leader in a matter of months.

Meanwhile I'm sitting here in a different city, 20 years of age, writing this shit on an anime dedicated imagesharing forum. Actually thinking about this fucker gave me quite a spark of motivation, but I fear I'll just wake up tomorrow, skip lectures because I feel "a little under the weather" while he will be out at sea providing for his family.
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I have a loving girlfriend who keeps me motivated also, she's harsh as all hell whenever I start getting wimpy, so I "man up" for her, but underneath I'm just as broken as before her loving motivational speeches.

I'm thinking of calling my old man up and confessing this shit to him, just to hear his voice and let him yell some sense into me...
He's a really stern and serious person, but he does have some love for his children. I fear nothing of the sort about it being "demasculating", but I'd rather just have some random guys from the internet talk some sense into me before I REALLY take the plunge and execute the final solution.


So yeah...
>tl;dr: Talk some sense into me before I have to stress out my loving old man
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>>672918360
Its ok anon.

My family has a norse background too, and my dads damn near the same way, but without the net worth and with a dash of mental illness.
I look up to him.

How often do you call out?
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>>672918360
Feels shitty dude, been struggling with the same thing tbh, but the only thing that drives me forward is the fact that i want to be more, i want to be better than others, kind of egomaniacle of me, but that´s what keeps me going, can´t make much of urself if u can´t even push urself through collage/university. Besides it´ll prolly be a passing thing and if you give up now u´ll regret it later when you finally find the motivation again, but those are just my thoughts on the matter. It´ll get better if you keep pushing
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>>672919037
>How often do you call out?

Never, my mom calls me once in a while to check up on me and the mistress, but I haven't talked to my man since I was home for christmas.

He's really shit at talking over the phone, and so am I...
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>>672919594
You sound like me.

How often do you call in sick?
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