I'm the asshat of an Anon who tried to kill himself with a Methlyphenidate overdose last night and failed to accomplish this one simple task. I'm back again partially to attention whore but also to seek some medical advice from any medfaggots lurking around here, mostly pertaining to some of the bad side effects of this most recent OD. To state the obvious, nothing I did last night was good for my body, but goddamn I did not expect it to be this bad. It's about a quarter after 3 in the afternoon right now where I am and I took the 1300mg around 930ish last night. I'm still having chest pain and trouble breathing and everything is a bit blurry like there's an abstraction layer between my inner and outer selves, if that even makes any sense at all. I'm still having quite the high here with heightened sensitivities to colors, lights, and sounds especially. I've been at home all day and I can't leave my room until my roommate is gone because of how absolutely fucked up my skin is. It's all red with a tint of purple in some areas where it seems like some of my blood vessels or whatever burst from how high fucking my blood pressure has been for more than half a day. Good God I'm in pain everywhere. My lip is also busted from me unconsciously chewing on it. At the height of my Ritalin induced high (about 1- 6am) I blacked out. I don't have any memories of this chunk of time at all. I opened the thread again and I'd not posted at all from what I could tell. I'm still not sure what I was up to during this period of time but I know that I wasn't sleeping but I wasn't too terribly active as I was nearly paralyzed by this point. I snapped out of this suddenly at around 6am this morning and I went inside and called in sick to school and work and then started to browse /g/ and 12pm came around in what felt like exactly 20 minutes. This is the fastest I've ever had a day go by like this.
Fuck it, I'm just reusing the last OP image I used for the original attention whoring bread
For reference I weigh 300 pounds, I'm 5'9 tall, and I'm a regular smoker. I have no serious known pre-existing medical cconditions other than being a tub-o-lard.
So can any medfags tell me what the fuck is happeing to my face? Please help me out here. I'm afraid that I'm going to end up even uglier than I am already! I don't even know how that would be possible but with my luck it'll probably happen sooner rather than later.
>inb4 muh 100 "go to le hospitals" shitposters
These shit-stuffed cunts can fuck right off with their insufferable trash.
Please /b/ I don't want to have to explain this shit to a doctor. They'll stick me with needles and try to keep me overnight against my will for wanting to leave this horrible world, and my only crime being failing on the execution of my plans. I hate this bullshit. Dear medfaga, please offer your skills to this neckbeard for just a moment!!!!!!!
Also I look like I was wearing goggles out in the sun lmao
Also my fingers are swollen and a little bit purple and cold to the touch. My hands look dirty in this picture but they aren't. That's the discoloration from the blood or something.
>>768123828
Just pick a better method retard
>>768123886
I don't have enough money for a gun or anything. I'm poor as fuck. That's why I live with someone else. If you have something that's not too painful and cheap, feel free to recommend me alternative methods.
>inb4 helium bag on head
I tried it and it didn't work. I guess I had a bad seal around the bag and it wasn't working after about 10 minutes with the bag on my head and so I gave up.
>>768123207
>>768123389
>>768123828
You died. Welcome back.
Welcome back faggot.
I remember reading your post thinking you picked a really fucking rough way to go about it.
Swelling I would imagine is edema from your heart not working well during the OD. Should go away eventually.
If you were to go to the hospital, treatment for methylphenidate OD is sedatives like benzos.
>>768123207
Go to a Hospital. Get help, after they release you go to a church and find God
>>768124156
rope is cheap
>>768123207
>tries to kys
>concerned about how look and how feel after
Anon I..
>>768123207
>attention whore
>>768125764
You missed that part.
>>768124214
Oh man I really am here forever. Is 4chan hell or something?
>>768125036
>I remembered reading your post thinking that you picked a really rough way to go about it.
How so? It would be better than getting hit by a bus or something like that. There are far more painful things I've felt than just being hyper and ehausted and just not getting up from the chair.
>edema from your heart not working well during the OD.
I really wish it wouldn't have worked at all. This is garbage. Well, thanks for the information on that.
>>768125200
No.
>>768125415
It's also painful. I've tried to hang myself before by just dropping onto my knees and not a full body drop. It was extremely unpleasant. Being killed by asphyxiation isn't fun at all.
If I'm going out it'll be on my terms with a method that I'm comfortable with.
>>768125764
I'm still alive, jackass. I'm not just going to stop feeling pain because I've lost my will to live, you absolute cunt.
>>768123389
You look like a fat Mark Zuckerberg.
Did you really try to od on ritalin? Wow, what a fun way to go. How about, you google amphetamine overdose and read what's written about it? Mostly i would stay in bed for a day if i were you.
>>768126243
>Absolute cunt
And yet here you are, bitching about the after effects.
>I've tried to kms 52 times and failed
You don't want to die, you want attention.
>How so? It would be better than getting hit by a bus or something like that. There are far more painful things I've felt than just being hyper and ehausted and just not getting up from the chair.
Well, alright. Could have gone a lot worse for you then, like a non-fatal arrhythmia that just makes you feel like you're having a never ending heart attack.
Have you tried getting really high in church? That might turn your life around
>>768126243
Christ. Grow the fuck up. Take some accountability for who and what you are. >lost muh will to live
You don't even know what living is. You're barely more than a child.
>go to hosptal
>try to OD on some morphine or some shit there
How about trying curing your depression faggot ?
>fails to kill himself
>gets back to /b
>no time stamp
>no skin pic
>>768126513
I've heard worse. I'll take compliments where I can get them.
>>768126582
No, I haven't done much reading. I just heard that these meds can be fatal in high doses and they're controlled substance for a reason, right? That's usually a sign that it's either deadly or fun to abuse, so it's a win-win for me. Well I thought I'd down the bottle and give it a go.
>>768126614
The attention is a side benefit, really. At the risk of sounding incredibly edgy, I've always found death to be interesting. I put on this show of things not so much for the attention I get, but for the benefit of the people viewing. If I was in your shoes I'd rather enjoy watching myself die.
>>768126725
A fair point. But I'm not really worried about that because it hasn't happened to me yet. Sounds narrow minded but that's the way I think of medical related stuff.
>>768127050
>I deliberately entered a thread of things I don't like just to be offended by it
How about you grow up, faggot. Leave the thread if you don't like me or the content of my thread.
>>768127142
I'm depressed because the world is a terrible place. This is a legitimate case of me blaming my problems on others, and I'm totally justified in doing so. I literally do nothing wrong except fail at being an hero. I get out of bed and go to class and then work, I support myself, I don't break any laws (aside from trying to off myself and abusing prescription drugs). I think I do a pretty okay job at being a good citizen. I pay my taxes and obey traffic laws. But what do I get in return for it? Absolutely nothing. I get a bunch of shitty communist jew propaganda shoved down my throat day after day. My family won't have me because I'm "too far right" when I'm just a normal guy and everyone else is going nuts.
So fuck it. I want out of his hell.
>>768127050
This anon talks a bit of sense.
Life gets tough and shit some times, but let’s be honest here have you really tried ? Have you really tried to be the best version of yourself you can be?
Have you ever fully committed to anything ?be honest about that to yourself.
I think before you do anything like this again why don’t you give yourself a real hard shot at maximising you’re potential. If you’re wanting out you’ve got nothing to lose by buckling down hard as fuck and just chasing a dream. Least when you decide to leave this world you can leave knowing you gave your all.
>>768123207
should have tried something more fun lad
i suggest:
-DMT
-KETAMINE
>>768123389
ello sean brown
>>768128187
Jesus mate, you are contributing shit, you are in your hole doing nothing. by killing yourself nothing will change, libtards will have an obstacle less in the real world.
DO YOU WANNA DO THEM A FAVOR YOU ASSHAT ?
Jesus Christ just get active, even if we are stuck in this loop hole of a life, it doesn't matter, the now matters. And what matters more is what you leave behind this world.
tl;dr stop being a faggot
>>768126243
>I've tried to hang myself before by just dropping onto my knees and not a full body drop
sounds like you're a pussy to afraid to actually end your life and are either subconsciously or consciously making the decision to pussy out at the last second, or do it in a way that you know will not lead to death, perhaps in an attempt to receive attention....
it was painful cause you did it wrong
also would you say it is more or less painful than what you have been going through thanks to this more recent method?
you saying a 12 year old had more balls to off herself than you?
>webm related
>>768128187
Idk if you'll believe me but I have some experience when dealing with people who have commited suicide (and actually accomplished it). I can tell you that your suffering will only get worse if you do it.
For example, once I helped a man who had hanged himself to leave earth. He had spent around 30 years feeling as if he was being asphyxiated, very little of human consciousness was left to him. It took around 12 hours to remove the ethereal rope that was still on his neck.
>being this far up your ass
>>768127508
This all day long.
>>768129179
I honestly ask you to no kill yourself. Yeah life is complicated and it make us want to quit, but you won't accomplish an "end" by doing so.
>>768128187
Yeah, find a cheaper method. I once stayed up for 5 days taking copious amounts of cylert, ritilan, adderall, concerta - on the 5th day I took a barbiturates and could no longer hide my insanity. Started telling my roommates about how badly I was hallucinating... If I can't kill myself with 60+ pills in 5 days, doubt you'll be able to
>>768128187
Tie an actual noose and hang yourself from a tall building. If you don't break your neck, you won't live long anyway - if the noose breaks - you just jumped to your suicide. I would sit here and tell you life gets better and all that - which it does. But if it's your choice to go out like this, god speed.
LOL I was just thinking today.
>"I despise all those who wish to kill themselves, if only I had the span of their lifetime added to mine I could accomplish so much more"
I'm a workaholic who's going to move the world.
As long as you want to kill yourself do it in the most painful way possible so that I may have some sympathy for you.
I hate weak people so at least you're taking the initiative to end it.
>>768129666
hi satan
>>768129086
what a waste of perfectly good loli,,,,too bad....
>>768129666
satan detected
>>768129844
agreed
was a sad week
>>768129666
>>768128301
Anon, are you serious? How can I be my best when my best wouldn't even be good enough to keep me afloat in this sea of filth and shit. Society is going down the shitter at an alarming rate. I know I'll sound like a spoiled child saying this but I've been deprived of everything a child should've had. I was deprived of a 2 parent household with a loving mother and father. I was deprived of a proper education in public schooling because of all the inner city diversity transplants that have been fucking that up for decades. I've been deprived of job opportunities that my great grandfather had with an 8th grade education. I work in manual labor right now and I need a high school diploma for that now too. I'm finishing high school because I have no choice anymore. And on top of this a bunch of retarded boomers have been telling me all my life that it's my generation that has it easy. We have it 10x harder than our great grandparents had it. They could support families of four on steel mill and assembly line wages but I do construction work and I can hardly scrape by supporting myself. Fuck this bullshit. Why would I want to be a part of that?
>>768129061
Why is it my job to go fight the shitlibs? What's worth fighting for? They've already spread their societal AIDS all over the place and ran everything nice into the ground a long time ago.
>>768129086
>hurr ur a puss if you don't behead yourself with a chainsaw or [insert other inane shit here]
Fuck you, faggot. If someone doesn't have a built in self defense mechanism that's impossible to override then they're a medical anomaly. A lot of your reactions to pain are automatically handled by the brain stem without being handled by higher parts of the brain. You can fault me for many things bit not for feeling pain. GTFO, faggot.
>>768129666
Hello Satan. Trips have been checked
.
>>768127508
>>768129384
What, yall wanna see my man tits and a timestamp? At least buy me dinner first you rude fags, goddamn.
>>768130271
Hey anon, it's me. Satan.
Would you like to see my room?
>>768130534
Sure, why not.
>>768123207
Try cyanide. It should be a really bad death but it's not expensive and works well
>>768130632
Where do I buy it?
>>768130271
too bad you pussy foot around suicide while whining about how much you want to end it and the only reason you feel pain during is because you are doing it wrong purposely because deep down you are afraid of killing yourself
you can lie to yourself all you fucking want faggot, keep coming up with excuses for why it's not your fault, or why it is because of other things out of your control
but in the end its all under your control
and you're just a pussy faggot to afraid to off himself the right way while simultaneously crying for attention after every failed attempt like a true edgy teenage faggot
>A lot of your reactions to pain are automatically handled by the brain stem without being handled by higher parts of the brain.
so you know this yet still choose to give yourself obvious outs when trying to commit suicide
okay i change what i said earlier, none of it is subconsciously, you know exactly what is gonna happen and hope for it
otherwise you would be making sure to cover your bases so the chances of survival are slim to none
you're just a pathetic faggot that wants to whine about life, not do anything about it, then cry for attention when you purposely fail at your own suicide because deep down you are afraid of doing it.
fuck off faggot, i hope you live a long miserable life
>>768130690
In the same places where you buy lab supplies, lurk a bit for online stores as well.
In my country it's really easy to find and it's well known that it's mostly used for suicide rather than mining or jewerly.
>>768130577
I keep them on my wall everyday...
>>768130743
>you are afraid of killing yourself
No shit, faggot. I'm trying to permenantly remove myself from everything I've ever known. I'd be lying if said that I don't fear death. Nearly everyone fears death. It's a very natural response. Are you fucking retarded or something? I know I sure am and I'm willing to admit it. But even a retarded fucker like me can see clearly that this is bait. I'm not taking it.
>>768130908
Thanks Anon. How much does it take to kill you? I ask because I'd like to avoid any nosey workers prying into the quantities I'd buy. Keep in mind that I'm a fatass (if that'll make a difference).
>>768131277
Is this some kind of origami week shit?
>>768129179
Says the schizotypal
>>768132133
>this is bait. I'm not taking it.
>after proceed to take the bait
you clearly don't understand what not taking the bait means
>>768132133
Don't get so cocky, I can resolve the will to accomplish anything via these faces telling me what to do.
I am God and always was God.
Goodbye now. It was fun.
>>768132133
I'm guessing that a houndred grams would be enough but you actually need to use like 10 grams to kill yourself. Sodium or potasium cyanide will work
