>tfw you relapse on heroin after 80 days clean.
What do I do now? I made it through all the horrible withdrawal symptoms and stayed strong through the worst cravings early on but these past couple of weeks have been really tough cravings-wise. I finally caved tonight after having arguments with myself for 2 weeks over whether to buy it or not. It's like there's 2 people in my mind, one that wants to be clean and the other that wants nothing more than to see the other fail. I probably sound like an idiot but I'm just pretty high.
Don’t worry the shock of relapse to your body will surely kill you with the amount you thought was safe
>>767462963
Heroin is bad for you fren. Didnt you ever learn to just say no
>>767462963
Don’t succumb to the demon. Choose your own fate.
>>767463031
Yeah I'm not a complete retard, I know my tolerance is very low hence I had a tiny dose and continue to dose small amounts until I'm feeling good.
>>767463068
Thanks for the advice bro! I just said no and I'm happy to say I'll never do heroin ever again. You cured me!
>>767463148
Easier said than done. It was like the longer I tried to ignore it, the louder that voice saying "do it" became.
>>767463312
Dude, just make sure not to get high of marijuana, (cannabis). It will kill you. What if a dealer mixes some into your heroin? Fuck man.
>>767462963
surround yourself with friends.
trust me.
People with no social life are more likely to have a problem with drug abuse.
Take veterans for example. Most of the crackheads from the 60's were former us military personnel who returned to nobody. Veterans who returned to a family/friends were almost always clean.
Omg dude it’s called suboxone. Grow up and get on it.
Stay the fuck away from opiates. People began fucking up in the early 80s, only to discover that opiates will take over your life. It's sad, but it's continued since that time.
There is nothing cool about heroin. It displaces the receptors your identity is stored in -- so are you yourself or are you a poppy in a field in Afghanistan? Creepy shit.
>>767462963
You should've learned to use drugs in moderation. Seems like it's too late for you now.
>>767463695
I was on it for a while when I first quit. It didn't do jack shit for my cravings but it stopped most of the major withdrawal symptoms.
>>767463561
Yeah that's actually a solid point. I've been trying to get a girlfriend for many years now but I get rejected everytime which only makes me feel worse about myself. I have a good group of friends but I still feel lonely from lacking a romantic partner. Just last week I met a girl at a party and we hit it off and I got her FB and was chatting to her but then she ghosted me. I either get flat out rejected or ignored everytime.
So, the reason for the relapse is pretty common. It's referred to as the pink cloud. You go through the pain of getting off of the heroin and the withdrawals stop and you start feeling good again. your body starts to naturally produce dopamine again and you feel so good that it tricks you into thinking it's okay to go get high again, that's why a sober support network is a good idea.
>>767463312
bro i don't think you want help. if u want to kick it you just gotta keep that discipline. it sounds like you're looking for some miracle advice to get you off it rather than facing the fact that you're weak and it's not the solution that is the problem but you yourself. but if you want some radical advice, go ham and hit rock bottom and if you really are the person that is above and better than the one that fiends then that person will make it out on top.
>>767464189
You're right, I don't want help - I know I'm the only one that can help myself. I made it 80 days and I can do it again, this time for longer or even forever. 80 days was a good milestone for me because for the 2 years before that the longest time I'd been clean was 14 days before relapsing again.
>>767464122
That’s usually something I hear from people who used it improperly.
What was your dose?
How often did you take it?
Was it managed by a doctor?
>>767464586
When I first quit I tried 8mg ~26 hours after my last dose but it didn't do much, then I had another 8mg an hour later and it cured most of my withdrawal symptoms apart from making my legs even sorer than they already were. Over a few weeks I tapered down to 0.5mg/day for a while then down to 0.25 and I jumped off because I've heard Suboxone withdrawals last way longer than regular opiates so I wanted to get off it before my body got used to it.
Don't get me wrong, it worked well for getting rid of the physical symptoms but didn't really reduce my cravings, I still thought about H many times a day.
Find a new addiction - I hear pornography is good.
>>767464918
I'm also addicted to making money but I kinda wish I didn't have so much because then it wouldn't be as easy for me to spend so much on H. I guess I'm lucky compared to a lot of addicts who have to resort to stealing to fund their habit. I make enough so that I hardly noticed the $100-200/day I was spending.
Porn is good but it's too different to take over from an opiate addiction
>>767462963
Can you get into a methadone program?
>>767462963
Wait until you come down and start over. Take it one day at a time. There are people here who are worse off than you (I was in a mental hospital last week, no joke, and I still relapsed after discharge). Relapse is a part of recovery. You are not overcoming your addiction. You are overcoming yourself.
Yeah you fucked up big time.
Relapse is part of the process.
Either you give up and go back to being a fucking useless loser, or you start all over trying to quit.
Eventually your brain will click over and you will stop doing this to yourself.
But you life probably has lots of problems outside of just heroine addiction. So if you take away the heroin without solving any of those problems, then you will just end up right back where you are.
Take some time and work on the things you neglected during your addiction. Work on your diet and exercise. I cannot stress this enough DIET AND EXERCISE. That is how you get your brain back on the right track.
>>767462963
My friend always says, it's not the first few weeks that are the hardest, it's the last few.
>>767462963
>>767462963
This analogy is so fucking stupid only somebody whose brain is damaged would find it to be clever or interesting.
Heroin addiction is more like digging a hole that only you can take yourself out of but instead you keep digging; Getting yourself more addicted and less chance of getting out.
>I failed
You try again
No excuses
>>767465855
Have you ever been addicted to Heroin or something similarly physically/mentally addictive? What I wrote is exactly what it feels like.
just stop again before you get addicted no harm done way less withdrawal if you stop right now it won't even matter that you relapsed just stop
Eh. Fight bro. Got a xanax situation I’m trying to “deal with” myself. Jesus fuck, the withdrawals.
I've read stories about the horrible shit that addicts do to the people they supposedly "love". They'd cheat and kill their own parents just to get that next fix. Is it a hopeless situation for them? They can't even feel compassion for others, so are they even human anymore? Should they just be abandoned by society?
>>767462963
Research and practice Stoicism. Fortify your mind.
Yes you are.
>>767462963
the stuff was more pure back in his days