ITT: We describe movies badly and others guess what they are.
>Tootsie visits the dentist
Movie 1
>A caring father forms a troubled but rewarding mentoring relationship with his young son's friend
>A woman shares some ice cream with her doorman
>A best selling novelist receives phone calls from a dedicated fan
>"I'm not laughing at you, I'm laughing with you!"
>"But I'm not laughing."
Additional hints
>Russian taxi driver seduces sister who wasn't laughing
>Doctor says lay off the salt. Last thing we see is man salting food heavily
Movie 2
>A man walks into town with his cock in his hand
>What he does with it is illegal in 49 states
Hints: I've never actually seen this movie, so I can't tell you anything about it. Kek! I just know that the production company came up with that as a tagline, then decided not to use it for obvious reasons.
Movie 3
>Be me, depressed Japanese man
>Attempt suicide; Fail
>Move to Thailand; Meet qt 3.14 thai girl
>Wash her dishes
>Attempt suicide; Fail
>Start to enjoy life in Thailand
>The lizard is lonely when he realizes he's alone
>Ambiguous ending
>Also, Yakuza
>>750733001
>ayy lmao
>common cold
>movie ends
>it's terrible
>>750733372
Every Steven Seagal movie ever made.
>robots look human
>guns
>stuff blows up
>>750734140
Terminator.
>>750734140
Cool Running's
>>750734552
Yes! Actually, there's a lot of movies that fit that awful description.
>>750734660
Slightly less accurate.
>>750733231
war of the worlds
>emo vampires
>party
>cruise through the night
>talk about art and poetry
>Gay guy beats people up
>Faggoty friend makes a porn with him, filming man in shower with dildo
>Gay guy rapes women to prove he's straight
>Gay guy dies; gets eaten by crabs
>kylo ren
>drives bus through the night
>thinks about art and poetry
>>750734915
Patterson
>>750734865
>>750734915
Are these the same movie? Wat?
>>750734812
Correct.
>>750734915
uh, thank god, i'm trying to get this solved for days..
>correct
>>750733085
Marathon Man
>a convience store
>a video store
>drug dealers
>shit happens
>Women go some place that's like a festival
>People look like vampires
>Vampire guy tears girl's shirt off, exposing her breasts
>Are these people really vampires?
>>750735135
Clerks
>>750735093
Right.
>>750735135
Clerks
>>750735135
Clerks?
iron man becomes black and jack black experiences intense withdrawal symptoms
>girl gets job
>hates boss
>quits
>>750735270
Tropic Thunder
>>750735275
The Devil Wears Prada
>badass cop is badass
>itsatrap.jpg
>an hero?
>>750735320
yup
>Therapist talks to various people in a town
>Everyone spills their guts to therapist
>Therapist never really says anything, just listens
>People heal themselves by talking to him
>Therapist isn't really a therapist
>Also, Earl rides his skateboard
>people shoot in warehose
>stevebuscemi.jpg
>the end
IT'S NOT FUCKING RESERVOIR DOGS
>>750735411
>IT'S NOT FUCKING RESERVOIR DOGS
Reservoir Cats
>honker
>jeopardy
.>vampire slayer not slaying vampire
>John Connor goes to prison
>Kevin McCallister's dad can't get him out
>The Green Goblin wants to buttfuck him but becomes a mentor instead
>John Connor and the Green Goblin stab Roseanne's ex husband
>midgets walk around a lot.
>>750735539
Dracula (1992)
>>750735411
Con Air?
>>750733001
>Let them use phone
>Get buried in the yard
>>750735587
Animal Factory.
>>750735797
Better Luck Tomorrow
>>750735822
Correct. I'm impressed. Even though I made it kinda obvious, I didn't expect anyone to get that for a while.
>entourage really good at writing equasions on windows
>make a lot of money
>still unhappy
>>750735848
nope, but I'll put it on my list
>A mans wife cheats on him then he goes on an adventure with a black man and sets himself on fire.
>slaps a frog
>?????
>lollipops
>Be me, socially autistic faggot
>Literally forget to eat because I'm such a sperglorg
>People make fun of me for being a wizard
>Run around in circles all day
>Almost kill some innocent people just for the fuck of it
>Become social outcast
>Spend rest of life total pariah
>Travel to Heaven
>Turn into Jesus v 2.0
>Go back to Earth
>Try to teach other people how to become Christlike
>They still tell me to go fuck myself
>>750736060
The Marine
>>750736021
Toy Story 2
>beta starts to dream about spiders
>beta sees himself but alpha
>alpha fucks beta's wife
>beta gets alpha's wife
>turns out to be a goddamn spider
>>750736175
Cocoon
>girl new job
>talks to guy about art and poetry
>shoots someone else
>>750735897
Good will hunting
>>750736144
no, but it's acceptable
>>750736267
no but close
>>750735675
Game of thrones
>>750734895
Bully
>>750736295
Cool.
Another guess: Hell Comes to Frogtown
>>750736342
A winner is you.
>>750736342
good flick. true story too
>>750733506
Top fucking lmao
>>750736344
did i mention kung fu?
>dude has oneitis
>dude and friend crash a party
>meet qt3.14 at party
>oneitis forgotten
>qt3.14's cuz is angry, kills friend
>dude kills cuz
>dude and qt3.14 both an hero
Probably still to0 easy.
>>750736222
Nope
>dudes appearantly don't like each other
>fight
>martha wins
>Be me, undercover cop
>I'm the good looking Hollywood hunk of the moment, so it doesn't even matter that I can't act my way out of a wet paper bag
>Hang out with good guys
>On the trail of bad guys
>The bad guys might not be bad guys
>The good guys aren't the good guys
>Maybe I'll become a bad guy too
Which two movies does this describe?
>>750735411
You posted this last night and someone got it...and I've already forgotten what it was.
>>750736670
no, as long as i was in the thread no one got it
>the good nic cage movie
>no, not gone in 60 seconds
>the other one
>>750736670
22 jump street
>>750736726
The Rock
or
Leaving Las Vegas
>>750736726
Wicker man
>>750736736
I stand corrected. I very accurately described four movies: that's one of them, which I wasn't thinking of, and there's another that also fits the formula.
>>750736518
romano and jillette
>girl pissed at older sisters bf
>sends him to jail
>bf and sis die
>>750736335
Close
>>750736726
breathless
just a bunch of people sleeping but it's really dramatic with epic music scores
>>750736175
i forget the name its like enemy or something
>>750736720
I don't want to spoil it for others since I didn't guess it myself. But someone definitely gave a movie that matched the description (illy-bay athgate-bay, if I recall correctly).
>>750736964
Correct! It's enemy
>dude good with books
>travels through europe
>fucks satan
>>750736949
Vanilla Sky
Probably not the movie you're thinking of but it fits.
>>750735403
Sixth Sense?
>>750735587
American History X
>>750736750
>>750736788
>>750736938
Nope, although these aren't bad choices
>>750736726
Matchstick Men. Adaptation
>>750737014
>illy-bay athgate-bay
???
>>750736726
Lord of War
>>750736820
Close enough.
>>750733001
you ill never guess this one.
The movie teases you about raping a 16 years old, the rape happens but there is no escene... FUCK YOUR AUSTRALIANS!!!! wasting my time
>teenage dickbag terrorizes town
>watches movies in jail
>good man
>jk hes still bad
>install gentoo
>the feels
>get dumped
>>750737087
>American History X
It was Animal Factory, as >>750735822 guessed correctly.
>>750737087
>Sixth Sense
I haven't seen it, so that might also fit, but it's not the one I'm thinking of.
Hint1: The two movies did come out the same year.
Hint 2: Mine isn't supernatural.
>>750737038
9th gate
>dude can't speak good
>dude sees doctor
>brother gets married
>dude learns to speak
>>750737137
Win
>>750736949
Inception
>>750737377
yup
>>750737136
Pig Latin for Billy Bathgate, which was the movie I thought someone gave for your Steve Buscemi.jpg mystery. But I guess that was the wrong movie too.
>>750737432
yeah, that wasn't it...
>Horses
>Capital is taken over
>Some run away
>Come back and kick ass with friends
>>750736726
Adaptation?
>>750737473
Ben Hur
Bad at hockey
Gotta save grandma
Mmm subway
>>750737215
beautiful kate?
>>750737411
Of course.
>>750737503
nope
>>750737237
clockwork orange, too easy
Time for an easy one.
>Hurr durr, I'm a fucking retard
>Hurrr durrr, droning on like a fucking idiot
>Hurrrr durrrr, I'm crippled and shit
>Jk, not really retarded
>Jk, not crippled
>I might be a pedo, though
Basically pic related in movie form.
>>750737514
Happy Gilmore
>>750735327
Ace ventura
>>750737380
the king's speech
>>750737514
happy Gilmore?
>>750737514
jesus christ...
>>750737622
The Usual Suspects
>>750737523
nope
>>750737658
holy shit you're a god
I even fucked up by calling him a doctor
>>750737593
>stretch legs with some friends
>sandniggers chimping out
>1v340 me feget
>ded
>>750737777
WHO GOT THEM QUADS BOI
>Fat ass and son bets legend something that hasn’t been done before
>28 hours
>Picks up hot bride
>Police Chase
>They make it and evade the cops somehow
>20 years in one room
>framed for murder
>set free
>find out why
>fucking gross
>>750735897
Social Network
>Be me, hot sauce salesman who thinks he's Jesus incarnate
>I'm famous. I'm evil. I'm a fucking manipulative psychopath.
>Loser faggot on other side of country gets fired. My sides!
>I'm rich
>He's not
>My life is awesome. People love me.
>He's a loser. No one respects him.
>I ignore him. I treat him like shit.
>Audience is made to feel sorry for loserfaggot.jpg
>Everyone roots for him when he challenges me to a contest
>But I win anyway
>Or do I?
>>750737907
Oldboi
Teenage girl uses a walnut and a Tatoo to save a painting from being destroyed
>>750737841
smokey and the bandit
>>750737907
Oldboy
>>750737919
yup
>>750733085
Django unchained
>>750737741
Transformers 3
>twisty riot gun
>missing kid
>muh eyeballs
This one may be hard.
>>750733001
angus, thongs and perfect snogging
>>750737841
Go
>>750737708
Winrar.
>>750737215
American Beauty?
>>750736021
Nothing to Lose
>>750735675
Time Bandits
>>750738006
nope
>>750738027
Formula 51 (US Title)
The 51st State (UK Title)
or
The Princess Bride
>>750737955
>>750737986
nailed it
>>750738054
NOPE.... is kinda of new i think,.
>>750738025
Minority report bro.
>>750738153
Bravo!
Time for a tough one. Don't fail me now, anons.
>Be me, literal badass who chews bubblegum and kicks ass
>AllOuttaBubbleGum.jpg
>Gotta go on a mission someplace scary
>Bitches try to act cool but they really want the D
>I can't run away because my balls and cock might blow up
>"You have aroused the three snakes!"
>Legendary B Movie.
>>750737841
Smokey and the Bandit
Movie 1:
>people getting very upset when you don't answer their questions the way they want you to
>that thing is actually meaningless
Movie 2:
>guy kills kid's dad, kid swears revenge
>not even sort of weeaboo
>would be worse with guns
>>750738002
It was Marathon Man. Solved already.
Out of curiosity, how did you get Django?
>>750738341
Hell Comes to Frogtown.
I cheated tho.
>20000 bucks torpedos but no electrical wire for 20 cents
>>750738486
>I cheated tho.
Bruh, you can't cheat! That defeats the whole purpose of the thread.
Aussie cunt almost kills a potato
>>750735403
Vanilla Sky
>be me
>be constantly confused with some other faggot named like me
>not too bothered by it, all things considered
>>750738474
>people getting very upset when you don't answer their questions the way they want you to
>that thing is actually meaningless
Pulp Fiction
>guy kills kid's dad, kid swears revenge
>not even sort of weeaboo
>would be worse with guns
The Princess Bride
>>750738692
Office Space
>>750738341
They live
>>750737339
Her
>>750738474
Movie 2 is true grit with swords
>>750738625
madmax beyond thunder dome
>>750738692
The Big Lebowski
>>750738692
the bug lebowsky
>>750738649
Wow. That does fit extremely well. But the movie I'm thinking of came out a few years earlier.
>>750738776
Very close.
>awkward sex scenes
>great bad movie
>no self awareness
>man has annoying gay brother
>gay brother ruins club business
>gay brother is a cock block
>brass knuckles
>>750738851
The Room
>>750738714
1 is right, 2 is wrong. I was hoping to ward off that answer with "not even sort of weeaboo".
Also:
>/g/, but IRL
>be me
>play vidya for a living
>life is meaningless
>boss is impressed with my minecraft skills and gives me a promotion
>VR girlfriend
>life is still meaningless
>why did I watch this movie?
>solves babbys first graph theory problem
>bangs an English girl
>John boy is a chav
>blacker than black
>saviour of the Jews is arrested at the end
>In Space
>Robot is a dickhead
>>750738875
The ballad of gay tony
a black guy about to go to college gets shot in the good
>>750738787
Nope. Let's just say there are more knives than swords involved.
>>750738939
2001?
>>750738780
indeed, have these tits
>>750738939
Hitchhikers guide to the Galaxy
>>750738939
lost in space
>band plays gig
>crowd not into their music
>lots of bandmembers die
>>750739017
correct
>>750739051
Green Room
>guys that hunt valuable rocks with niggers now hunts bears
>actually bear hunt guy
>guy dont care for the bear, only cares for vengance
>>750739046
He said dickhead, not suicidal depressive.
>>750739100
yeah too easy
>>750739090
no robot in 2001 you tard
>>750738939
the last Alien film?
Talking on the phone while driving.
... That's actually a very good description of this movie.
>be me
>try to get free tv but get more than i bargained for
>didn't matter, had sex
>>750735675
The Hobbit
>Patrick Bateman gets a job as a carpenter
>Dies
>>750739127
revernant
>britbong goes to the Middle East
>becomes leader of a group of goatfuckers
>>750739277
The Cable Guy
>>750739191
Wasn't the monolith an extremely advanced computer/A.I.?
Teen uses soda to defeat bully before fighting final Puerto Rican boss
>>750739315
Lawrence of Arabia
>>750739277
cable guy
>>750738988
Don't Be a Menace to South Central While Drinking Your Juice in the Hood
Fuck, that took a long time to type.
>>750739320
Wrong genre, wrong year, wrong everything.
>oh yeah, I also run a tv network
>spherical hole in space
>a wolf man
>a clown
>chased by the FBI the Japanese
>gangster chokes a hamster
>>750739466
Interstellar.
>>750739346
monolith was some kind of god object
computers are not robots
>>750739367
dude wheres my car
>Potato niggers chimp out and kill people
>Ron Jeremy is there but it's not a porno
>The Green Goblin says don't be a fag
>>750739562
Nope
>>750739251
Forgotten the name of it but that one with Tom hardy where it literally is just him in a car
>>750739567
The Boondock Saints
>>750739514
It was described as an advanced computer built by an ancient civilization in the book, so he's got that part right.
>>750739567
boondock saints
>>750739567
Boondock saints
>>750739510
Yep.
>>750739616
Yup.
>>750739567
gangs of newyork?
>>750739760
That also kinda fits, now that you mention it.
>>750735175
Raw?
>>750733001
girl learns to walk despite her father's wishes
>>750739191
HAL9000 is considered a robot
Guy shoots up a bar and fucks a librarian
>>750739667
>the book
thread about movies
>>750739800
The Little Mermaid
>>750739845
Desperado
>>750738002
Candie vs the dentist
>>750739514
>completely autonomous
>moves on its own
>makes decisions
>interacts with its environment
>not a robot
>>750735889
>Rich lady throws a contractor hired to make a closet for her yacht into the water, and refuses to pay.
>Strange turn of evens lady shows up int he hospital with amnesia and nobody is claiming her.
>Contractor makes up fake marriage to bring the rich lady home.
>She cooks, cleans, deals with kids.
>Literally calls her his slave
>They fall in love.
>Real husband comes back.
>>750738479
>>750738002
Also, I just jumped on the 2nd post and didn't scroll down to see the solve :p
Everyone wrong so far.
>be me
>try to get free tv but get more than i bargained for
>didn't matter, had sex
>oh yeah I own a tv network
>putting video tapes in places they don't belong
>>750739891
Yes. I honestly didn't think this would go that quick.
>>750739814
robots are mechanical
HAL9000 was a supercomputer
>>750739863
>a movie based on a book
>>750739978
VIDEODROME!
>>750739864
yup
>Colored men shoot each other over diamonds
>>750739944
Knight Rider The Movie
>>750739796
That might also fit, haven't seen Raw, but the movie I'm thinking of came out about 25 years earlier (at least).
>>750737741
300
>>750740071
There's the answer. Well done.
>>750740136
Snatch
or any other movie with niggers and diamonds.
>>750737421
yup
>too young to fuck
>too young to fight
>fucks then dies fighting
>also it might be the 1950s, might not be
>dog gets new roommate
>they go outside and have to dodge gangs and law enforcement
>friends go looking for them
>dogs join forces with a gang
>it turns out at the end one of the dogs likes to masturbate in front of women
>irl troll this rich bastard
>thought i got away, but got caught
>irl troll some other richer bastard
>>750740151
win
>Three guys fight over treasure
>>750739944
>moves on its own
is in a room and only operates ships systems
a robot is a mechanical that is controlled by a computer or other source
a computer that controls a thing is not the thing its still a computer
if you control a robot with a remote you are not a robot
>>750740269
Dogfight
>>750740394
A Simple Plan
Good fucking movie
>>750740191
Wrong, guess again
>play an unreasonable amount of vidya
>everything worked out better than expected
Could describe 2 movies
>>750740343
The Talented Mr. Ripley
>>750740469
>Wrong, guess again
You don't tell me what to do.
>>750740324
Secret like of pets
>>750740394
Pirates of the Caribbean 2
>>750734140
Bladerunner
>>750739953
goldee hawnn
>>750740529
'fraid not, pepe.
>>750740448
So close. They do fly planes
>hottie from the sea
>fire breathing dragon
>kill asian guy
>>750740444
I was talking about the monolith, so good job.
>a robot is a mechanical
>a computer that controls a thing is not the thing its still a computer
So robots aren't robots?
>if you control a robot with a remote
HAL doesn't use a remote lmao
>>750740532
>s.l.o.p.
winrar
>>750740518
tron, tron legacy
>>750740049
>game of thrones
>based on a book
>not same as book
>who would have thought it?
>fucking retard
>>750740631
Need a hint. Is this animated?
>>750740653
Uh.. no. There's no unreasonable amount of vidya playing happening in either of those.
>>750740444
>A robot is a machine—especially one programmable by a computer— capable of carrying out a complex series of actions automatically.[2] Robots can be guided by an external control device or the control may be embedded within.
Wow. Nice.
>>750740467
wrong movie
